July 2022

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JULY 2022 | TAMUZ • AV 5782

Game On!

Maccabi is Here


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Contents JULY 2022 | TAMUZ • AV 5782

PUBLISHERS

Mark Edelstein and Dr. Mark Moss EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

Jacqueline Bull

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32

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ASSISTANT EDITOR

Nathalie Feingold

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR

Eileen Sondak

CREATIVE DIRECTOR

Donna D’Angelo

SENIOR CONSULTANT

Ronnie Weisberg

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

27 Ben & Esther’s Deli: An Interview with the King of

Emily Bartell, Linda Bennett, Leorah Gavidor, Emily Gould, Judith Fein (Senior Travel Correspondent), Paul Ross (Senior Travel Photographer), Patricia Goldblatt, Pat Launer, Sharon Rosen Leib, Andrea Simantov, Marnie Macauley, Rabbi Jacob Rupp, Saul Levine, Rachael Eden, Sybil Kaplan.

30 North Coast Rep Makes a Bold Move With an

Jonathan Ableson | Senior Account Executive Alan Moss | Palm Springs

Features 24 “Once In a Generation” San Diego Maccabi Games

Vegan Jewish Deli Food Original Musical

Columns 11 From the Editor | Learning from Optimism 18 Israeli Lifestyle | Bridge Over Blessed Water 20 Examined Life | Gun Violence in America: An American Tragedy and Travesty 22 Religion | How To Embrace Your Future While Succeeding in the Present 42 Advice | What You Should Never Ask an Allergic Person

Departments 12 The Scene 14 Our Town 16 What’s Up Online 32 Local Offerings 34 News 39 Food 40 Diversions

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assistant@sdjewishjournal.com SDJJ is published monthly by San Diego Jewish Journal, LLC. Subscription rate is $24 for one year (12 issues). Send subscription requests to SDJJ, 7742 Herschel Ave., Suite H, La Jolla, CA 92037. The San Diego Jewish Journal is a free and open forum for the expression of opinions. The opinions expressed herein are solely the opinion of the author and in no way reflect the opinions of the publishers, staff or advertisers. The San Diego Jewish Journal is not responsible for the accuracy of any and all information within advertisements. The San Diego Jewish Journal reserves the right to edit all submitted materials, including press releases, letters to the editor, articles and calendar listings for brevity and clarity. The Journal is not legally responsible for the accuracy of calendar or directory listings, nor is it responsible for possible postponements, cancellations or changes in venue. Manuscripts, letters, documents and photographs sent to the Journal become the physical property of the publication, which is not responsible for the return or loss of such material. All contents ©2022 by San Diego Jewish Journal. The San Diego Jewish Journal is a member of the American Jewish Press Association and the Jewish Telegraphic Agency.

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COVER Maccabi co-chairs Larry Katz, Kira Finkenberg and Adam Jacobs.

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Learning from Optimism This month our cover story is about the Maccabi games which are due to start at the end of this month. We initially covered San Diego Maccabi in Sept. 2019 when it was originally slated for summer of 2020. And again in March of this year when it was rescheduled. We’ve featured it three times because it is a massive deal. It is the biggest gathering of Jewish teens in the world. It brings together athletes and families from about 70 different cities and nine different countries. And like the Olympics, the opportunity to host the games doesn’t come by that frequently. The next time it comes to San Diego could be 15 or 20 years from now. I was heartened by the stories of the lasting friendships made by the games from past teammates or host families. An anecdote that didn’t make it into the bigger feature is that Larry Katz’ kids who were supposed to be the bat boys for Team San Diego switched to Team Austin because they bonded with the Austin players that were hosting. Over the past year or so of thinking about the games, I’ve wondered what the “secret sauce” that Maccabi has that makes such an impact and it reminds me of one of my other favorite topics in the pages of SDJJ: theater. Theater and sports both are team-oriented and involve a group with a common goal. I think perhaps being in a context with one mission fosters deep bonds. Kira Finkenberg mentioned how this was one event where many different parts of Jewish San Diego truly come together on one goal. I think we can learn a lot from these collaborations. Is it the common goal? Is it simply because the cooperation is absolutely essential and there is a need for it that makes it happen? It is just us responding to the need? Is it because we feel ownership and pride over the San Diego name and want to represent well on the global stage? Is it because it is for the younger generation? Is it the fun nature of the event? It is probably a combination of things and I think in this case sitting with these questions is more important than knowing the answer. Whatever it is that makes it special, I’m just glad to see how it has united our community. If building enduring Jewish connections is something you are passionate about, I encourage you to look to Maccabi or other organizations and events that you see are successful at building those connections and see what you can learn from them. A

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The Scene

FAR LEFT Hosts

Cindy and Larry Bloch.

NEAR LEFT Gary and Jerri-Ann Jacobs.

Speaker Debbie Simmons and daughter Emily Ascencion.

Gala co-chairs Shari Schenk, Jean Gaylis, Cindy Bloch, Mary Epsten and Jane Ottenstein.

Seacrest Foundation 2022 Women’s Auxiliary “Reunion Gala” The “Reunion Gala” was a memorable evening featuring a variety of performances and activities to entertain guests. Truly a reunion gala, this extraordinarily special event was the first gathering of the Seacrest community of supporters in over two years.

Upon entering the main event area, guests were welcomed by dynamic emcee and improv comedian, Renee Kohn, and performance by a local band, the JMANN Trio. Dinner was overlooking a magnificent vineyard and featured a 3-course gourmet meal paired with exquisite wines.

Guests enjoyed performances from classical guitarist Fred Benedetti and “living vines” that gradually came to life in an awe-inspiring, mesmerizing transformation. An engraver was on site to custom etch wine glasses for all guests.

All proceeds raised through sponsorships, underwriting and ticket purchases will support Seacrest Village Retirement Communities’ Resident Assistance Fund which provides charitable care for residents who are most in need.

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“The Music Returns” at Camp Mountain Chai’s 2022 Gala Camp Mountain Chai’s Annual Gala, “The Music Returns,” held on May 1, 2022, was a wonderful success. It highlighted the new Mental, Emotional, Social and Spiritual Health (MESSH) initiative which is part of the overall Camper Care program. CMC exceeded its fundraising goal by over 50%, allowing for the expansion of these vital services, now and for years to come. The world famous Maccabeats, a Jewish a Capella group, gave an inspiring performance at the beautiful San Diego Mission Bay Resort. It was a fantastic way to start off the camp season which will bring the largest number of campers in Camp Mountain Chai’s history!

Champions of the Arts honorees Pam and Hal Fuson.

PHOTOS: VINCENT ANDRUNAS

David Bark, Board Chair. David Ellenstein and Denise Young, Gala co-chairs Laura Applegate and Sarah King, honorary chair Jamie Carra and Bill Kerlin.

Deena and Todd Kobernick, Founders.

Andy Mayer and Heidi Gantwerk. Vangie Lake and Holly Carney.

2021 Champion for the Arts honorees Julie and Jay Sarno.

North Coast Repertory Theatre 2022 Spotlight Gala

Gala entertainers The Maccabeats.

North Coast Rep held their annual gala at the Fairmont Grand Del Mar on June 6. The event featured dinner and drinks, auctions and live entertainment. The gala serves as the main fundraiser for the theater and this year recognized Pam and Hal Fuson as San Diego’s Champions for the Arts. This accolade is awarded to those who have dedicated their time and talents to benefit visual and performing arts in San Diego. Tamuz–Av 5782

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Our Town by Linda Bennett and Emily Bartell The San Diego Food Bank held its 10th Annual Gala, “Chefs Cork & Craft Gala: Hang Ten!” on April 23rd in such a lovely setting. Held outdoors on the grounds of the Food Bank’s facility in Miramar, co-chairs Ellen Gruer & Cindy Hickman created a fabulous evening themed after the local surfing culture, while ensuring the safety of all in attendance. The Chef Committee Chair, Sara Polczynski, created a delicious selection of foodie delights. Among those at these sold out events were Joyce Camiel & Brice Westphall, Amy Blum & David Zubkoff, Marie Steinberg Elias, Lindsay & Phil Serghini, Nancy & Alan Spector and Margie & Sheldon Derezin. We were so delighted to attend the Camp Mountain Chai 6th Annual Gala on May 1 at the San Diego Mission Bay Resort. David Bark and the Gala Committee, put together a great event highlighted by a truly entertaining performance by “The Maccabeats” which brought us to reflect joyfully on our past camp years. Some of the other Camp Mountain Chai supporters on hand were Theresa Dupuis & Gary Kornfeld, Andrea Musicant & Peter Huot, Lisa Kalal, Susan Levin, Rosie Jacobson, Olga & Oscar Worm, Stacey Coleman, Myla Wingard & Lou Rosen, Jennifer Clifford & Kevin Klein, Cindy & Frank Korn, Rebecca & Daniel Schaerer and Todd Kobernick. What a wonderful read! Recently, the “Union Tribune” interviewed national early childhood policy analyst and a children’s book author Minh Lê. Living in La Mesa with his wife, Aimee and two boys, Jacob and Ezra, he has received praise for his achievements through a number of award-winning picture books, including “Drawn Together,” “Lift” and “Let Me Finish!” along with writing about picture books on his blog “Bottom Shelf Books” and his work on the board of We Need Diverse Books, a nonprofit advocating for changes in the publishing industry that lead to the creation of more books featuring diverse characters. His latest collaboration with Caldecott Medal-

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winning illustrator Dan Santat, “The Blur,” is about how fast children grow up from the parents’ perspective. The 32nd Annual San Diego International Jewish Film Festival held a mid-season screening of “Fiddler’s Journey to the Big Screen”; a behind the scenes look at what it took to bring “Fiddler On the Roof” to the big screen. Some of those in captivated by this amazing film were Elisha Blatt, Joy Heitzman and Jack Cohen, Avrille Copans, Phyllis & Mo Gold, David Friedel, Rosie Jacobson, Linda & Peter Levine, Michele Kipnis, Kim Kipnis, Margo Gordon Engelstein, Diane & Gordon Kane and Carol & Danny Strub. Such a joy to be able to share in our family’s pride as Annika Cooper Nies was called to the Torah at Temple EmanuEl on May 21. Daughter of Lisa & Dustin Nies and Grandchild of Linda & Michael Bennett, family and friends looked on with pride as Annika became a Bat Mitzvah. The celebration continued into the evening at Paradise Point Resort. A fabulous celebration was held in honor of Rabbi Cantor Arlene Bernstein’s 25th Anniversary at Congregation Beth Israel on May 7. Held on site, folks strolled around the grounds decorated as an Israeli Shuk. Kudos to the entire Event Committee, co-chaired by Silvana Christy and Robin Spiegel. The evening celebration also announced the creation of the Rabbi Bernstein Israel Travel Scholarship Fund. It will offer scholarships based on financial need for youth and/or adults participating in approved Israel experience programs. With over 400 people in attendance, some of those honoring this great person were Julie & Howard Haimsohn, Lorraine Kimel Hennesy, Robin & Joth Layton, Marty & Gail Levin, Lil Weiner, Sheryl Baron, Si Coleman, Perla Meyers, Linda & Larry Okmin, Sylvia & David Geffen, Marg Katleman, Rusti Bartell-Weiss, Susan & Richard Ulevitch, Helene


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& Allan Ziman, Meg Mandel, Carol Levy, Lesley & Scott Lyons, Bonnie & Barry Graff, Mary Ann & George Scher, Stephanie & Michael Epstein, Jerry Goldberg, Herb & Ellen Hafter and many rabbis from all around the San Diego community. Mazel Tov to Mark & Laurie Spiegler, on the birth of their first grandchild, Aine Rue Spiegler, born on Feb. 14. Happy parents, Jessica & Michael Spiegler will be moving their new family here to SD in July. AZ Grandparents, Molly & Wayne Butler are excited to welcome the new edition as well.

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WHAT’S UP

Online

Texas Rabbi Who Founded Underwear Nonprofit Named CNN Hero by Jackie Hajdenberg, JTA News A Houston rabbi was named a CNN Hero for her work as the founder and CEO of Undies for Everyone, which provides underwear and dignity to children in need. Rabbi Amy Weiss founded the project in 2012 to assist the majority of students in Texas’ largest school district, Houston ISD, who are economically disadvantaged. Undies for Everyone has provided more than 2 million pairs of underwear to children across the country who are living in poverty. In times of natural disaster, Weiss’ organization has stepped up to include adults in need, too. In 2019, Undies for Everyone expanded to eight other states. This year alone, the organization has distributed 1.1 million pairs of underwear to children in need, giving them the “daily dignity” of clean underwear. CNN Heroes is a program that honors ordinary people who lead charitable causes. Every week, a different CNN Hero is profiled on CNN and CNN.com.

It’s official: Biden to visit Israel, West Bank and Saudi Arabia in mid-July by Ron Kampeas, JTA News President Joe Biden will visit Israel, the West Bank and Saudi Arabia next month. The statement said Biden’s visit will “reinforce the United States’ iron-clad commitment to Israel’s security and prosperity,” and in a phone call with reporters on Monday night, a senior administration official said Biden will discuss joint missile defense efforts with Israeli leaders. Biden wants to “rekindle a new political horizon” for the Israelis and the Palestinians, the official said. Biden has said resuscitating the prospect of a two-state outcome to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict is a foreign policy priority and twice since assuming office has intervened to tamp down outbreaks of Israeli-Palestinian violence. Continue reading these articles at sdjewishjournal.com

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Jewish basketball legend Sue Bird will retire after this season by Jacob Gurvis, JTA News This season will officially be WNBA superstar Sue Bird’s last. The Jewish four-time league champion and five-time Olympic gold medalist announced that she would retire following the 2022 season. “I’ve decided this will be my final year,” Bird shared on social media, accompanied by a picture of her playing basketball as a child. “I have loved every single minute, and still do, so gonna play my last year, just like this little girl played her first.” Off the court, Bird has been a leader in the movement for equal pay in women’s sports. Prior to the 2020 Olympics, Bird led a successful effort to secure more pay for players who wanted to train for the Games — without having to go abroad to make money. She also helped WNBA players negotiate a new contract that allowed stars like herself more than triple their salaries.


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ISRAELI LIFESTYLE

LIVING ON THE FRONT PAGE by Andrea Simantov | andreasimantov@gmail.com

Bridge Over Blessed Water 27. This is the number of years that have passed between this morning and the day I landed at Ben Gurion Airport to begin a new chapter. I was so smart. So certain. So noble and more than a little cocky about the correctness of making aliyah. We lined up our ducks, crossed the “T’s” dotted the “I’s” and with straight backs and raised chins, embarked on the adventure. I knew so much. I knew it all. I knew nothing. With only a smattering of Hebrew, neither family nor friends, no cultural or financial connections upon which to rely, I jumped off of a spiritual diving board into an abyss that was filled with little more than assumptions and blind faith. The assumptions were mostly wrong but the aforementioned faith helped keep me tethered to the shaky dream, even as I was confronted with unexpected outcomes at every turn. These were the days before Nefesh B’Nefesh was even a pipedream; indeed, a miracle organization that offers career guidance, job placements, identity cards, language classes and community guidance even before the new immigrants board a plane to the Holy Land. My personal aliyah consisted of one nasty meeting with the Jewish Agency in Manhattan in the spring before our departure where we were warned of the difficulties that lay ahead should we embark on this foolhardy journey. Vive la difference? Not so much. That first year I sat in the house and hid. When a neighbor asked why I wasn’t at Rosh Hashanah prayers, I lied and

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said that I’d gone to the other shul. (Thankfully, there are a plethora of synagogues in Jerusalem and people temple-hop like nobody’s business.) I sent the children to school with wholesome lunches and change for the public telephone and prayed that no one would ask me for help with their homework because I felt useless. Even when I heard a report or two that concerned me about their education, I felt unable to speak with a principal or homeroom teacher. 60 days after our arrival, Prime Minister Rabin was assassinated and I drove to a local grocery store to find someone who could explain to me what had happened in words I might understand. I willed everything to be alright. But my will wasn’t enough. Things weren’t alright and after seven years, my forever-marriage ended in divorce and the children were flung hither and yon; school mattered little and the nearperfect life I’d so smugly constructed in my mind was irretrievable. I had to work even though I had no marketable skills, no language. Decisions about every tomorrow beckoned. But I didn’t make decisions. Instead, in a state of perpetual mourning, I let life “happen,” leaving almost everything to chance. The cost was incalculable.

And still, there was the adventure that comes with not knowing what lies around the corner or on the steep drop at the end of the path. When my car was repossessed, I learned to navigate Jerusalem’s terrific public transportation system. I cleaned houses, babysat, wrote articles, pinched shekels and most days, kept the lights on. I made friends, went to lectures, walked to the Western Wall and, years after my arrival, I discovered my personal Israel. This discovery is still happening with unexpected surprises popping up each day. The gematria for the number 27 includes both ‘to weep at or for’ and transparency/clarity. Both work for this aliyah anniversary as I wax nostalgic, remorseful and deeply, deeply satisfied. Because the one thing that remains constant is an ironclad yiras Shamayim, faith in Heaven, the same faith that initially fueled the desire to return home. A


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EXAMINED LIFE

OUR EMOTIONAL FOOTPRINT by Saul Levine, M.D., Professor Emeritus in Psychiatry at UCSD

| slevine@ucsd.edu

Gun Violence in America: An American Tragedy and Travesty Within the span of a single week here in the United States there were four mass shootings in different cities and locations (arena, subway, store, Church). In each instance, legally acquired automatic weapons were utilized. We are not even halfway through 2022 and there have already been close to 200 mass shooting experiences in this country. These have occurred in a variety of venues including private homes, schools, markets, concert halls, temples, offices and other choice locations. Over the last two decades, there have been hundreds of mass shootings in the United States, resulting in thousands of innocent people killed and wounded. No other developed and supposedly civilized country or nation in the world comes close in gun violence. I write these serious words, having read the copious disturbing data on gun violence in the United States and having heard the news media over decades and still the beat goes on. Each time a mass shooting occurs, we get a sick feeling in our guts, a shock to our brain and especially to our hearts and souls. Each time, we seek wise explanations and comforts, to no avail. Why is this happening here, we plaintively ask. Why are other developed and wealthy countries spared? Other nations also have citizens who are

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stressed, or emotionally disturbed, or disenfranchised, or who experience domestic violence or use drugs, or have access to weapons, yet our gun-violence rate per capita is far worse than other high-income countries. (Our insanely soft gun sales and control laws would be laughable if they weren’t so painfully tragic.) Why do people in the United States have easy access to handguns, rifles and semi-automatic high capacity weaponry, or caches of weapons (of war!)? For gun duels? For family protection? For hunting and target practice? A standing militia? Even weapons at home supposedly in locked cabinets, ostensibly there for purposes of protection, have been widely utilized in domestic disputes and other solo or mass killings. Even if these guns exist for avowedly “acceptable” reasons, they are frequently utilized for purposes of fury, hate, mayhem and murder. Why must Americans relive this experience every few days or weeks in a preternatural ritual of regret and recriminations? Even though outpourings of heartfelt “thoughts and prayers” are expressed by politicians and other officials, we are decidedly not comforted. We are sad outliers in the developed world. Why does this country regularly suffer through these tragic rituals of

group massacre, provoking profound feelings of loss and pain, followed by umbrage, political attacks and blame? Why do the citizens of this country, comprising 4% of the world’s population, own almost 50% of the world’s privatelyowned weaponry? Why is the Second Amendment seen as the Holy Grail by so many Americans? The “Right to Bear Arms” has become a self-destructive mantra. Why can just about anybody (racist or hateful, unstable or mentally ill) buy a lethal firearm in this country? Why do many Americans not believe the valid scientific data which correlates these killings with the ready availability of guns? Why do we ignore irrefutable facts? Why do we not learn from other countries and scientific data which demonstrate that when strict laws limiting purchase and ownership of guns laws are enacted, these murder rates drop significantly?! Why are so many of our politicians obviously polarized and paralyzed, unable or unwilling to pass pro-social legislation which can help citizens and society? When will the next mass shooting tragedy happen here? When will we ever learn? A


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RELIGION

POST-POLITICAL by Rabbi Jacob Rupp | rabbirupp@gmail.com

How To Embrace Your Future While Succeeding in the Present In last months’ article, we discussed the value of creating a clear vision for your future. Creating this vision unlocks feelings of opportunity and abundance. But oftentimes we come crashing down to earth when we hit the tree called “reality.” As we consider what we want in the future, we need to also contend with our current responsibilities. Sometimes we feel so stuck by these demands that we either forsake our dreams entirely, or wish to just drop our lives and previous commitments while we attempt to go after our desires. Neither of these approaches will lead us in the right direction. There is a false notion that the only successful people are those that have nothing else but their career or family in their lives and they are solely focused on one thing. But instead of this being a model for success, this is a recipe for a lack of completeness. While it is true some things take more time or focus at one point or another, we can’t neglect our responsibilities and see them as a burden; rather one must unapologetically accept they are part of the package. If you owe money, don’t put it off or pretend it doesn’t exist. Don’t beat yourself up either; learn how to budget to pay it off. Restructure your debt or

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Use the constraints in your life as leverage to work harder and have a bigger goal.

your company. If you have kids, don’t be upset that they demand time or more money from you. If you have religious obligations, don’t get upset at the religion — it’s who you are and it’s your burden to shoulder as you climb your mountain. As a personal aside, in my early dark times, I’d feel bad or suffocated by the fact that I had a large family that needed much of my time and finances. I would wish that if I could just be free and go on my own, I could be so much more successful because the barrier to entry as a completely detached person is lower. However, as my wife so wisely reminded me, the responsibilities in our lives often make us more driven instead of less. So rather than being upset that we have constraints, use the constraints as leverage to work harder and have a bigger goal. Thus be realistic about what you need and who you are. This will limit the

tension between who you are and what you are doing. If you have a big vision for your company, but for whatever reason it can’t or isn’t at the place you want it to be, you will again begin to feel the tension between who you are and what you need and the process will repeat itself. Even if your company creates the monetary abundance that you want, but you aren’t just motivated by financial gain from the work you do, you’ll be miserable. The same applies with finding a relationship. Be who you are. If part of who you are is someone that needs to be very close to family, don’t date someone that doesn’t want you to be close to your family. The more work done up front in this area, the more pain you escape later. However, it makes sense to have an outside trusted opinion of what truly is required for your lives and what isn’t. Maybe you think living in a certain location, or having a certain luxury in your life is necessary, when in reality it isn’t. Learning to do without often gives you tremendous freedom. Billionaire investor Chris Sacca gave the timeless advice that living well below your means gives one a sense of wealth and unlocks tremendous creativity. Living below your means might mean giving up your new BMW or your expensive gym membership. But it doesn’t mean not continues on next page >>


Post-Political

continued

paying your credit card bill or paying for your children’s private education if that’s what they need. An outside source often can objectively tell us what we need and what we want. A word on finding said outside sources; they should know you well and hopefully have more life experience than you. The reason for this is that someone who doesn’t know you well might just dismiss something which you need as something you want. Taking their advice would be detrimental and lead you to feel disillusioned, upset and unfulfilled and back to the crisis process you go! This month, focus on what you need and what is needed from you. Who in your life needs you? What obligations have you committed to that you shouldn’t just walk away from? How does this need to fit into what you are doing now? Hint: If you’re married with kids, consider that your spouse might need more from you than the capital you generate in the office. Make your plans that include your current responsibilities and consider how you can succeed brilliantly with them as well. The vision you create that takes into account your current reality with your future desires is one that is not only profound, but also uniquely yours. A

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JUL 31 THROUGH

“Once In a Generation” San Diego Maccabi Games

AUG 5

by Jacqueline Bull It’s here. It’s time. After years of planning and the long Covid postponement, the JCC Maccabi Games are here in our very own San Diego. Having the Olympic-style competition of Jewish teens in your home city is a once-in-a-generation big deal on its own. It is special for a whole host of other reasons too. It is the first games post-Covid, it is the first games to pilot the Access Games for Jewish teens with disabilities and it is the first games not divided across two cities — that means that San Diego will have about double the amount of participants of a typical year. When I spoke to the three co-chairs of the event (Kira Finkenberg, Adam Jacobs and Larry Katz) the planning was entering its final stages.

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“We’re working to cross all of our ‘T,’s dot all of our ‘I’s to make sure the venues are set, the volunteers are trained, the uniforms are ordered — all the final details,” Kira said. Kira was in opening ceremonies mode when I talked to her–getting each delegation’s music and helping choreograph the seating arrangements and order. Larry Katz was focused on securing host families. Adam Jacobs had come out of a meeting finalizing the food menu. The rescheduling posed many challenges — like athletes aging out of the 13-16 range — and it also gave those on the planning committee a second glance at the logistics. “This was a chance to reboot. When you are running the games every year,

you may not have a chance to really analyze what’s working and what’s not because you don’t have time,” Adam Jacobs said. One of the most notable changes to this year’s games from the ones planned in 2020 is the scheduling of two of the biggest features of any Maccabi games. The opening ceremonies are historically on the first night of the event, the Sunday night. With so many athletes traveling from around the world in many different time zones, it creates a very long day for some of the competitors. Wanting to create a high-energy and memorable event (especially being the 40th anniversary of the games), they decided to move it to the Monday night. And now to start off the games, the first day will be the JCC Cares programming.


PHOTO: TED REIDERSON PHOTOGRAPHY

FEATURE

The community-centric elements like JCC Cares speak to the heart and ethos of the games. Adam explains it as Jewish peoplehood-building through the lens of sports.

JCC Cares has the athletes doing volunteer projects around the host community. One of the projects this year will be packing backpacks for underprivileged students in San Diego. Moving this to the first day created an opportunity to involve the host families in the service projects as well. “This year it is athletes, coaches and the host families, so think of that impact. We are going to have 1500 athletes, plus all those coaches, plus 500 host families — look at all that people power. That is a really cool and exciting change,” Adam Jacobs said. The community-centric elements like JCC Cares speak to the heart and ethos of the games. Adam explains it as Jewish peoplehood-building through the lens of sports.

“After everything that we’ve been through over the past two years, I’m so excited for the community. All the community organizations are getting involved and are partnering up — whether it is Federation or Hillel or ADL — everyone is truly getting involved. I sit on six different boards here and they don’t all always work together and for this event they are all coming together to work as one and I think that is really special,” Kira said.

More Than Athletics

Adam Jacobs exemplifies the family connection in the Maccabi games. He was a teen athlete, coach, delegation head and now co-chair. Gary and JerriAnn Jacobs, Adam’s parents, were co-chairs the last time the games were in

San Diego. Even Adam’s wife Amy is on the committee for the JCC Cares. JerriAnn is still heavily involved making calls to get host families signed up. “My mom is a rockstar. I joke with her that it is a good thing that we have unlimited data and unlimited call minutes because she has been on her cell phone nonstop. If this was in the 90s when you could only make calls on nights and weekends, she would’ve been out of luck [laughs]. My mom is personally responsible for over half of the host families that have signed up,” Adam said. And on the nights when she watches her new granddaughter Aylana, she will even make calls during her naps. Kira remarked that Jerri-Ann is a great spokesperson having been a part of the games from so many different angles and has a big passion for what the games stand for. The proof of the long-lasting impact of being involved in the games is evident in Adam’s daily life. “All of the players that I coached for four years on the baseball team, they are still on a group chat today,” he said. These friends are not all from San Diego either. Often when cities don’t have enough athletes for a full team, they are combined. The team Adam coached had three players from Milwaukee. “They have all graduated college and are starting their careers. They are all now talking about working together on business projects or getting referrals to different organizations. It is so cool to see those connections made in the Maccabi games are flowing all the way through to today and the impact that is going to have on their careers and lives is just so cool,” Adam said. This group includes co-chair Larry Katz’ sons. “They are all over my house half the time. I come home and I’m like ‘Oh the Maccabi kids are here,’” Larry said. At time of printing, host families are still needed to house the incoming athletes. Visit jccmaccabisd.org to learn more. A

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BECOME A HOST FAMILY!

Families with at least one Jewish member are invited to host members of the community while they compete in the JCC Maccabi Games . For more information, scan the QR code.

Register Now! JCCMaccabiSD.org


FEATURE

Ben & Esther’s Deli: An Interview with the King of Vegan Jewish Deli Food by Nathalie Feingold As a child, Justin King grew up visiting his grandparents house and they would always have a spread of traditional Jewish cuisine laid out for him. Now as an adult and a vegan of 15 years, Justin realized that there was nowhere that he could go to get his favorite childhood dishes anymore. So, he decided to be the first when he opened up Ben & Esther’s vegan Jewish deli. “I’m vegan and I want to be able to eat the stuff I grew up eating. I love a good bagel and lox, a reuben — that’s what I was raised on. Whenever we would go to Ben and Esther’s house, Esther would cook all day. So, I always wanted to name something after them to honor them and

Justin adamantly believes that traditional Jewish deli food can be vegan without sacrificing an ounce of authenticity. I figured opening a store in their style of cooking was the best way to do that,” Justin explained. Justin said that his vegan values parallel his Jewish values like two sides of the same coin.

“Jewish values are often rooted in doing good, doing mitzvah and so I think they go hand-in-hand,” Justin said, “Ben and Esther were always trying to do good for their community, that’s a Jewish principle.” Justin directly gives back to the community through Ben & Esther’s Monthly Mitzvah program. On the first Tuesday of every month, the deli partners with a different nonprofit, they then donate 20 percent of the day’s sales to the group. Justin adamantly believes that traditional Jewish deli food can be vegan without sacrificing an ounce of continues on next page >>

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Ben & Esther’s

continued

authenticity. That’s why his menu is chock-full of classic Jewish deli staples. Some customer favorites include: the lox bagel, the reuben and the steak and eggs. The lox bagel is made from a base of thin-sliced, salt-roasted and brined carrot. “A lot of our customers–even the ones that eat salmon lox–actually prefer our lox, because it’s not as fishy tasting. We do stuff to mimic the fishiness, we put seaweed and flax oil in it and we smoke it. So, it definitely has that smoky, briny, fishy taste, but it’s not overwhelming,” Half of Ben & Justin continued, “We Esther’s customers have people come in all the time saying, ‘I’m not aren’t vegan or even vegetarian, but I love Jewish, they just your lox.’” enjoy the food. In fact, half of Ben & Esther’s customers aren’t vegan or Jewish, they just enjoy the food. “A lot of our customers who aren’t vegan or vegetarian still prefer to eat our food because it tastes like their childhood favorites,” Justin said. Justin believes that a high‑quality vegan Jewish meal starts with a deep understanding of the cuisine and by offering food that’s relatable to people. “The key to making a good vegan Jewish meal is understanding your dish and not sacrificing the quality. We sell so many reubens to non-vegetarians too, because they say it tastes just like a real reuben, and that’s because we use the right ingredients, we really don’t skimp on stuff.” Justin explained, “Just mimicking the real deal. I think that’s the secret, not trying to reinvent the wheel, just doing a vegan version of the classics, but we make them in a traditional way, so we’re not sacrificing anything.” According to Justin, there’s a lot that consumers can learn from veganism. “I think having good Jewish vegan food shows people that you can eat the stuff that you actually like, but in an ethical way. Our reuben is a real reuben — there’s nothing that says corned beef has to be cow, we as a society just decided that and agreed to it. But, there’s no reason we can’t start redefinining meat,” he explained. Thanks to Justin, vegan Jewish cuisine is now more accessible than ever in San Diego. Those who are interested can get high-quality vegan takes on deli classics at his storefront on El Cajon Blvd; he’s also opening another in Oceanside this summer. But he doesn’t plan on just stopping there. “I see opening a few shops every year, we’re trying to get to 20 locations within the next five years. Kind of like how in New York you have a bodega on every corner, well, I’d love to see a vegan Jewish deli in every city,” Justin concluded. A


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North Coast Rep Makes a Bold Move With an Original Musical A SDJJ Exclusive Interview with “The Remarkable Mister Holmes” Director David Ellenstein. by Nathalie Feingold

“The Remarkable Mister Holmes” is a world premiere musical comedy where the iconic detective Sherlock Holmes uses his unmatched sleuthing skills to solve a seemingly unsolvable murder mystery. The production is directed and written by David Ellenstein. Omri Schein is his co-writer and lyricist and the music is composed by Daniel Lincoln. North Coast Rep invites you to leave your troubles at the door and enjoy their brand new musical set to run from July 20 through Aug. 21. SDJJ: What first inspired you to create this musical? David Ellenstein: Sitting around the office one day, I decided to do a bit of research about what the most popular productions North Coast Rep had ever put on. Much to my surprise, the two best-selling non-musical plays we have ever done were both Sherlock Holmes shows. Most of the rest of our top sellers were musicals. “Ding!” A Sherlock Holmes musical. SDJJ: Can you provide some backstory on the musical?

Co-writers Omri Schein and David Ellenstein.

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DE: It is a musical comedy murder mystery. It is a “who done it” using iconic characters and intricate plot twists. It is a comedic roller coaster whose goal is to create joy, humor and a good time, while tickling the intellect to try to unravel the mystery. The message? Leave your troubles at the door and enjoy the show!


FEATURE

THE REMARKABLE MISTER HOLMES: Bart Shatto (Holmes), David Ellenstein (Book & Director) and Omri Schein (Book & Lyrics).

PHOTOS: AARON RUMLEY

SDJJ: What are some takeaways that you want the audience to leave with?

SDJJ: What differentiates your musical from other retellings of Sherlock Holmes? DE: First and foremost, it is a musical and a comedy. The only other Holmes musical I know of was called Baker Street in the 1960’s. It was supposedly rather dreary and took a very serious approach to the topic. Our show is full-out fun. I like to describe it as a cross between “My Fair Lady” and “The Producers.” It’s a crazy murder mystery tinged with a Mel Brooks sense of humor with Sherlock Holmes right in the middle. I immediately brought in my friend, the extremely talented Omri Schein, to conceive the story with me and to co-author the book. Omri is also an accomplished lyricist and his lyrics are really funny. We then brought composer Daniel Lincoln on board to write the score which is quite amazing. SDJJ: Are there any specific parts of the musical that you’d like to highlight? DE: There are some fun twists and turns to the plot—it is never quite what it seems. Part of the premise is that Dr. Watson is away when the crime spree in London begins and Dr. Watson’s long lost sister shows up to become Holmes’

partner, much to his resistance to that occurring. I think we have created a plot that will have mystery buffs trying to put the pieces together. SDJJ: What are you most excited about in regards to this musical? DE: Watching it take flight! It is a new baby. We have been working on it for many years—watching it actually come together on stage and then to hopefully feel the joy it will bring to audiences is the reward that I am looking forward to the most. SDJJ: Can you tell us about the production process? DE: We are currently in pre-production, so it is all planning and logistics. Conceiving of a show with 18 original songs, multiple locations and an intricate plot with lots of characters is a tall order for North Coast Rep and our intimate space. This show will be a challenge to our ingenuity and creative thinking. I am lucky to work with such a talented group of designers and a crackerjack production staff at North Coast Rep. It is exciting to anticipate what we will come up with to solve all the challenges.

DE: Sheer joy — having had a grand time at the theatre. Even though there is all kinds of crazy stuff in our show, it also has a reverence for the underlying Conan Doyle material and for the classic form of musical theatre. I think — though brand new and filled with inventive twists — there is also something old fashioned about it — in a good way. I hope they will feel they have visited with an old friend and had an amazingly good time in doing so. SDJJ: I heard that this is your biggest show—Can you touch more on the big things you expect for this show and its future? DE: It is a huge undertaking for us. The set, the costumes, the wigs, the props, the music, the cast size. We will have to scale everything to fit in our space. We have high hopes. If all goes well and we can fulfill the promise of this show, it is the kind of musical that can play in large venues and be expanded proportionally to fill Broadway-style theatres. We hope that many others will see that too and that the production will have a long life beyond North Coast Rep. SDJJ: Anything else you’d like to add? DE: It is my sincere hope that we can create a great time at the theatre for the audience. In our troubled times, this show will hopefully brighten peoples’ outlook a bit and let them laugh and enjoy their time in the theatre and perhaps, for a while beyond. In many ways, this play is a love letter to the theatre. A

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Local Offerings La Jolla Playhouse

PHOTO BY JIM COX.

All content is available on lajollaplayhouse.org THRU JULY 24: Lempicka This musical follows the dramatic life of famed art deco painter Tamara de Lempicka.

PHOTO BY MATTHEW MURPHY.

▲ Deborah Ann Woll as Katherine (center) with the cast of “The Taming of the Shrew” at The Old Globe, 2022.

The Old Globe All content is available at theoldglobe.org THRU JULY 10: The Taming of the Shrew A contemporary take on one of Shakespeare’s comedies, that “The New York Times” called “an exhilarating new way to look at the comedy through modern eyes.”

Cygnet Theatre All content is available on cygnettheatre.com JULY 13–AUG. 21: Cabaret A remounting of one of Cygnet’s best-selling musicals: “Cabaret.”

North Coast Repertory Theatre All content is available on northcoastrep.org. JULY 20–AUG 21: The Remarkable Mister Holmes A world-premiere musical comedy where the iconic detective Sherlock Holmes uses his unmatched sleuthing skills to solve a seemingly unsolvable murder mystery.

Coronado Playhouse All content is on coronadoplayhouse.org JULY 15–AUG. 7: Two Gentlemen Rock Verona The San Diego Premiere of a twist on Shakespeare’s “The Two Gentlemen of Verona,” set to a rocking 1950s soundtrack.

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▲ Eden Espinosa as “Tamara de Lempicka” in La Jolla Playhouse’s production of Lempicka.

San Diego Museum of Art All content is available on sdmart.org WEDNESDAYS: Gilbert Castellanos Presents: Young Lions and the Wednesday Jam Session Enjoy swinging Jazz music, cocktails and SDMA’s sculpture garden every Wednesday at Panama 66.

San Diego Natural History Museum All content is on sdnhm.org. ONGOING: California Blooming This exhibition features 35 stunning photographs of California’s wildflowers captured by conservation photographers Nita Winter and Rob Badger.


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Votes on Two Critical Bills Follow Release of New Democrat Coalition’s Inflation Action Plan Rep. Scott Peters (CA-52) voted to pass two bills that reduce food and energy prices, address supply chain challenges and help get goods to the global marketplace faster: the Lower Food and Fuel Costs Act and the Ocean Shipping Reform Act. Peters’ support for these two bills comes days after the New Democrat Coalition (NDC) released a comprehensive

New Park in Stockton Neighborhood The city of San Diego officially opened Island Avenue Mini Park, providing a highly desired recreational space for residents in Stockton and the surrounding neighborhoods. What was previously a vacant lot is now a revitalized $3.1 million mini park which features new play and shade structures, swing sets, picnic tables, security lighting, improved landscaping and irrigation and ADA compliant pathways to facilitate access for all users. This project is part of a group of four mini parks being improved in Southeastern San Diego.

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Action Plan to fight inflation, lower the cost of living for Americans and promote the long-term fiscal future of the nation. “These two bills target the intertwined causes behind the high prices and shipping challenges that force Americans to make painful economic decisions,” said Rep. Peters.

Museum of Jewish Heritage – A Living Memorial to the Holocaust to Launch Digital Guide for New Exhibition “The Holocaust: What Hate Can Do” There is a new digital guide to coincide with the new exhibition at the Musuem of Jewish Heritage. The guide joins more than 70 cultural institutions globally on the Bloomberg Connects app. The guide will feature narration from Julianna Margulies, Eleanor Reissa and other guests.

App users can learn about works featured within the Museum’s exhibitions, watch videos of the Museum’s public programs and events, access Museum podcasts and download educational materials for use in schools.

San Diego REP Cancels Remainder of 2022 Productions San Diego REP has canceled the remaining scheduled productions in 2022 and has had to lay off all staff. Operating the theatre during an active construction site and lack of additional funding contributed to the closure. The board of trustees and leadership are working to restructure and bring back the theatre at a later date.


Reimagined. SENIOR LIVING

SDJA Leader Returns from Private Audience with Pope Francis Allie Hauser, Head of the Golda Meir Lower School (GMLS) recently returned from her international leadership delegation of B’nai B’rith’s trip to Rome and the Vatican. The delegation included diplomatic meetings, a conversation with the Cardinal President of the Commission for Religious Relations with the Jews and a private audience with Pope Francis. All were focused on fostering Catholic-Jewish relations. “The visit with the Vatican was both touching and inspirational,” said Hauser. “My personal goal was to learn more about the diplomatic importance of the Holy See. Professionally, I hoped to find opportunities to connect over shared values and link these values to the development of relational consciousness, social-emotional learning competencies and best practices for authentic education. The visit accomplished that and so much more. I left not only inspired by the potential for interfaith collaboration on theological and service-oriented projects, but also by the deep Jewish history in the city of Rome and the significance of the chain of thousands of years of shared Jewish experience.” In his remarks, Pope Francis commented, “Let us go forward together, on the basis of our shared spiritual values, to defend human dignity against all violence and to seek peace.”

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NOW PLAYING! MUST CLOSE JULY 24

The remarkable true story of the iconic Art Deco painter Tamara de Lempicka, told through rousing pop anthems and breathtaking performances.

SEE IT BEFORE BROADWAY! TICKETS START AT $25

Eden Espinosa as “Tamara de Lempicka” in La Jolla Playhouse’s LEMPICKA; photo by Matt Murphy.

GET YOUR TICKETS TODAY! LaJollaPlayhouse.org (858) 550-1010 UP NEXT! BEGINS JULY 26

BY MOISÉS

KAUFMAN AND AMANDA GRONICH

CONCEIVED AND DIRECTED BY MOISÉS A CO-PRODUCTION WITH TECTONIC

KAUFMAN

THEATER PROJECT

A world-premiere play which explores the repercussions of the arrival of an unexpected album of WWII photographs at the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum.


ADVERTORIAL

A group of visitors take a tour with Sandra Scheller and pose next to a life-sized Ruth Sax standing next to her mother’s dress worn in Auschwitz.

A photo of Ruth Sax, age 13, two days before entering Theresienshadt.

‘RUTH Remember Us The Holocaust’ Exhibit Open Through August in Chula Vista A Holocaust Exhibit in Chula Vista. Sounds crazy, no? But here, in this little city, they take intolerance very seriously and educate students about the Holocaust beginning in elementary school. Since January 2020, RUTH (Remember Us The Holocaust) has been an exhibit inside the Chula Vista Public Library. It features the stories of 13 Holocaust survivors that came to the South Bay. Inspired by Ruth Sax, a South Bay Holocaust survivor who tirelessly gave of her time to educate young people about the horrors of the Holocaust. Although Ruth is no longer with us, her memory lives on through this exhibit. One of the featured items is the dress that Ruth’s mother was forced to wear by her captors in Auschwitz. It is

Inspired by Ruth Sax, a South Bay Holocaust Survivor, the exhibit features the stories of 13 South Bay Survivors.

a stark reminder of the humiliation and derogation experienced by Nazi prisoners. The exhibit will expire at the end of August. On Sunday, August 21, the South Bay Historical Society and Chabad of Chula Vista will sponsor Brunch with Mayor Mary Salas, a fundraiser with special guest humanitarian speaker Lothian Skelton, Red Skelton’s wife. The funds will be used to continue educational programs and future exhibits.

“This was a good seed, but every seed must blossom. The need for a more extensive regional Holocaust Museum is more important now than ever,” said Sandra Scheller, exhibit creator/curator and daughter of Ruth Sax. Holocaust survivors unanimously agree that San Diego is ready for a museum, not just an exhibit. The exhibit has attracted many national and international visitors. The response has been overwhelmingly positive. Donations to the South Bay Historical Society funded transportation to the exhibit for over 10,000 students and created a YouTube channel, Holocaust Education for Chula Vista Schools, that features Holocaust survivor stories for the entire community. The exhibit is open during library hours seven days a week.

Chula Vista Public Library (Civic Center Branch) is located at 365 F Streeet, Chula Vista 91910 Library Hours: Mon–Thur, 10 a.m.–8 p.m. | Fri–Sat, 10 a.m.–5 p.m. | Sun, 1–5 p.m. Sandra Scheller is available for group or personal tours by appointment: 619-422-3429 or sscheller@cox.net.

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| SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM July 2022


Food

by Micah Siva

noshwithmicah.com

Strawberry & Feta Salad If you’re looking for a reason to eat more salads this summer, this is it! This lettuce free salad will please even the pickiest eaters! Fresh, seasonal berries pair perfectly with salty feta cheese and herbaceous mint and creamy pistachios. Unlike lettuce-based salads, this one won’t get soggy for your beachfront picnic or backyard BBQ! SERVES 4 INGREDIENTS:

PREPARATION:

• 4 cups strawberries, halved

1.

Combine strawberries, vinegar, olive oil, salt and pepper in a bowl. Let sit for 15-20 minutes, or until the strawberries start to macerate and release juices.

2.

Once macerated, toss the strawberries with mint, feta cheese and pistachios.

3.

Enjoy!

• 2 tbsp. red wine vinegar • 1 tbsp. olive oil • Sea salt and pepper, to taste • 1 cup fresh mint leaves, torn • 1 cup feta cheese, crumbled • ¼ cup pistachios, chopped

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DIVERSIONS

Netflix releases Israeli period drama ‘Beauty Queen of Jerusalem’ by Caleb Guedes-Reed And Gabe Friedman, JTA News Netflix viewers can watch “The Beauty Queen of Jerusalem,” a period drama that follows a family of Spanish Sephardic Jews living in Jerusalem through different decades of the early 20th century. The first 10 episodes are available now and a second batch of 10 episodes will be released on July 29. The series, which won four Israeli TV Academy Awards this year after debuting there last summer, stars Israeli heartthrob Michael Aloni — of “Shtisel” and “When Heroes Fly” fame — and is based on a book of the same name first translated into English in 2016.

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| SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM July 2022

The series, which won four Israeli TV Academy Awards this year after debuting there last summer, stars Israeli heartthrob Michael Aloni.

The story flips back and forth between decades, from the Ottoman Empire era to the days of the British Mandate of Palestine, which eventually becomes the state of Israel. The series showcases Judeo-Spanish traditions and chronicles the dynamics of prestate Jerusalem, including tensions between its Jewish, Arab and Christian residents — with dialogue in Hebrew, English, Arabic and even Ladino, a rarity in Israeli TV. The plot involves the Armoza family, whose men seem cursed to marry women they don’t love. A


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ADVICE

ASK MARNIE by Marnie Macauley, M.S.

| marniemacauley@gmail.com

What You Should Never Ask an Allergic Person Shalom my dear San Diegans: We Jews adore questions. The answers — eh not so much. There are those rare times you shouldn’t ask because you might accidentally get a rotten answer. So, I’m here to help which brings us to today’s topic: Questions no one should ever ask an allergic Jewish person. Now, why have I chosen this particular subject? Simple. While, like my friends, I walked around my whole life schnarfling (my cross between sneezing and leaky sniffling), not too long ago, I awoke with eyelids (upper and lower) that were the size of dirigibles. Also there was the question of being blind. I ran to an ophthalmologist. I could see the local paper. “Marnie Macauley: Writer, counselor, speaker with seven fans passed away today. Cause of death: Fat eyelids.” The next day I resembled the Elephant Woman. Small children ran from me. I then ran to the E.R.. Six hours later, I got what I asked for: a massive shot of cortisone. “You’ll also need an EpiPen” the doctor said, adding, “Whoa! You were almost in anaphylactic shock. Don’t touch anything anywhere — ever. Wash your hands with, yada, yada.” So I graduated from Jewish schnarfler to eppes, a full grown Epi. I almost passed out. But I did get a free turkey sandwich. After my brush with death, I’ve become allergically-correct and thought it my duty to alert everyone, Jew and

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| SDJEWISHJOURNAL.COM July 2022

Gentile alike, to never ask the following questions to people who have things swelling, blowing up, or running from their person.

Questions You Should Never Ask an Allergic Person 1. “What foolishness! Don’t you know it’s all in your mind so the pharmaceutical companies can make out like bandits?” Mamalas, this is not a good question to ask people who, after passing a can of blueberries, resemble Violet Beauregarde, especially when they’re armed with needles. Trust me. Their nice Jewish kops don’t make them shnarfle at other people, scratch in strange places unless they’re baseball players or blow up and down. Besides, should you utter this question, you’ll get a lecture, 15 doctors’ notes and their family history of “bad” noses that started with Sarah. I suggest you simply say: “Rhoda, the shnarfling, the scratching, the blowing up and down really makes you — a stand-out in a crowd.” 2. “Darling, Is it really necessary to call over the chef and ask exactly who touched the food and with what in a five-star restaurant?” What? An allergic Yiddishe kop should trust some Frenchman who gives out

gold stars to adults? How do you know the history of that veggie burger or what it’s been through? If someone dripped into it? Blew on it? Sneezed around it? With our mazel, the server Mo had Yoo Hoo dribbling from him which he sopped up with a towel he brought when fishing that morning to hold his bait and walnut snack. He then turned it into a bandana and schvitzing on it, made that into a veggie burger. A street vendor in downtown Calcutta is safer. Better a person be a little annoying than you spending seven hours in the E.R. because her veggie burger contained major toxic chazzerai? 3. “Tee hee. And Judy, you didn’t even know I slipped a peanut in your shake five minutes ago, now will you admit you’re not allergic?” Judy can’t answer because her mouth is frozen in a horrific maw as her throat is turning into a blowfish. Sweethearts, surprises are nice if say, they include an intro to the single head of Mt. Sinai, tickets to Matisyahu, an old tape of Fanny Brice, a Krusty the Clown memorial pin. These are decent “surprises.” Killing a person “for-herown-good” is much like the episode of Seinfeld, when someone slipped lobster in Jerry’s girlfriend’s omelet. Even here, her soul might be affected, but not her continues on next page >>


Advice

continued

breathing apparatus. But more, causing death-by-Goober of a 33-year-old, trust me, will deeply affect your relationship with mitzvahs. 4. “I have absolutely no idea what’s in this water. It’s water! When has water killed a person?”

different Medical ID bracelets. Trust me darlings. If he’s in public school, the one thing he doesn’t need — is advertising. They notice him! On the other hand, if he’s in Jewish Day school, brilliant! From your idea you can start a new homebased business: KippAlert. A

He knows, mamala! Trust me, he has a list that includes seven people who took a shower and exploded. Three were in Afghanistan where their brightest terrorists were doing secret “testing” of the power of human dribble. Another lived in a cave near the Dead Sea. A fifth was an extra in “Singing in the Rain,” and the rest, a real tragedy … when their mamas’ poo pooed on them to ward off the evil eye. Much better to say: “Listen Sheldon darling... let’s invest in a raincoat.” Even if you live in Death Valley. 5. “Mamala, how about if Mommy lists your allergies on your yarmulke. Won’t the other kids think it’s adorable?” Your son schnarfles, has spontaneous nose bleeds and more hives than a beekeeper. He’s puffy. He asks strange children to scratch him. He sits out in gym, science, home economics, lunch, the playground and school trips to bread factories. He carries more pills than a 70s rock band and wears five

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