Friends, Family, or Farm Animal? Dorothy Crosby

Friends, Family, or Farm Animal?

Dorothy Crosby - Stoddard, NH

We’ve all been there; someone points out, in your dire situation: it’s “just a horse” (or a dog or a cat or a…). Ask any animal person, and in the species of their choice, the specific representative in question is a family member, a “fur baby”, a partner. That animal lover is emotionally invested; life without this precious one is unimaginable– they dread the day that emptiness occurs. To say it’s “just” anything is a major infraction and has caused many a rift in relationships.

Just one more time humans can learn from animals!

Non-animal person Friend: How do you tell them apart? (in all fairness, at home I have bays: dark, mahogany, brown with points…)

Me: Can you tell your kids apart? Friend: they don’t look alike! Me: yup. Friend: ?? But… Me: Does your dog look like mine? Friend: Your dog is a different breed than mine. Me: Yup! Friend, during a child’s lesson: that horse doesn’t respond the same way the other one does... Me: yup.

In horses, the hierarchy, or pecking order, is important! But most horses don’t care if they are number 1 or number 101; they just need to know their place in line: who is ahead of and behind them to function happily in a group. There’s an Alpha in charge, a passive leader selected and respected by the others who rarely has to enforce their position. Sometimes an aggressive leader is aspiring to be boss; he rarely has friends. Horses stand together but retain their independence.

Every horse has a unique personality (horse-onality?) that identifies it as different from the others. We have a boy-ish gelding needing a baseball cap and a worm in his pocket and an elusive boy who rarely shows any emotion or attachment, but loves attention and happily hangs out if the bodywork is an option. We have the mare putting others in their place and literally making faces at the perpetrators. We’ve had the shy, submissive one hanging back, rejecting any responsibility, and the old respected one, who simply leads the way. We’ve loved honest and giving lesson horses, and those who don’t give anything away for free but expect precision and attention to detail for their perfect response. We know the funloving silly ones, who like to play and Fall 2020

sometimes need reminding their humans are not horses. We have completely submissive, opinionated, or independent -yet cooperative- types. Some horses are suited for and love their jobs, some are not but tolerate them, some express loudly and clearly that life is not what they expected and they should be able to call the shots, some carry on despite their disdain. There are those who are social with other horses, some who are social with humans – who comes when we whistle or shows up for that carrot? - and those who prefer being alone when the situation allows. Some are affectionate and love a good rub after a happy ride, some are not much into touch. Many are driven by food or their favorite treats; some are beggars and others are so polite and careful. Some are anecdotal, some pranksters, some playful, some serious…and I am talking about the horses!

Pairs of horses, students, or owners and horses, can change the dynamics of any interaction. Not all horses are compatible, but when they bond, they are loyal friends. I can pair a horse and student for a lesson, but have a completely different lesson if I pair another horse with that student or another student with that horse just an hour later! One owner and a horse will have a different relationship than another owner with the same horse. The skill level of the rider can determine the outcome, but the sensitivity of the horse can, too! And we all have good and bad days/ hours/moments… all of us!

As with people, their level of education or fitness can make a horse more or less capable of doing his job. Or she may be a natural at tackling a particular type of task. Regardless, so many variables may determine suitability and attitude, both in work and play and in relationships. The rider/owner and horse can seriously impact the way each other views life…and their working relationship, as partners in a common task, can define their existence both together and individually. The souls of two species intertwined are something animal people understand and applaud.

However you interact with your horse or other animals, in whatever defines your relationship together, I hope it is a mutually beneficial and satisfying relationship that provides pleasure and meets the needs of both of you. May you have the absolute joy that is possible from this unconditional and binding relationship that feeds both of you in various ways!

Owner of Equi-librium and based in Stoddard NH, Dorothy Crosby is certified as both a Level III Centered

Riding®Clinician/Instructor and CHA English and Western Instructor. Director of the Riding Program and

Barn Manager at Southmowing

Stables in Guilford VT, she loves working with riders and horses of all ages and abilities. Recently certified with Conformation Balancing, a program for fascia release in horses, Dorothy loves the softening and changes in the horses. Dorothy offers clinics, lessons, workshops, and fascia release bodywork sessions both on and off the farm. Fall 2020