Seven Days, December 6, 1995 by Seven Days

ODD, STRANGE, CURIOUS AND WEIRD BUT TRUE NEWS ITEMS FROM EVERY CORNER OF THE GLOBE Hit-and-Miss Preposition A federal trial in Philadelphia, which resulted in the conviction of mob boss John Stanfa, featured testimony by his inept hit men: Philip Colletti, John Veasey and Rosario Conti Bellocchi. Veasey described using a power drill to torture a man, but explained, "the drill bit broke." He and Colletti said they were driving down a street in August 1993 when they spotted Stan fas rival, Joseph "Skinny Joey" Merlino, and opened fire. Aithough they killed his companion, they only wounded Merlino, then realized their car could be traced to Colletti since it was leased in his name. They planned to report it stolen, only first they doused it with gasoline. Just as Colletti tossed a match, Veasey spotted some coins inside and reached for them. At home, he soaked his severely burned hand in lighter fluid and set it on fire a second time to establish an alibi, informing neighbors who heard his very real screams that he burned himself trying to light a grill. Bellocchi told how he ran into a restaurant and leveled a shotgun at the pizza maker, an out-of-favor gang member. "I put the shotgun in his face and I shoot," Bellocchi testified. "The shotgun didnt go off. I shoot again. Again nothing." Finally,

he discovered he had loaded the weapon with the wrong-size shells.

Looking

for

Trouble

When a car pulled up next to a city ambulance in Washington, D.C., the three men inside shouted at the driver that he was going too slow. According to Emergency Medical Services spokesperson William McLaughlin, when an ambulance crew member told them to go ahead and pass, one of g if

^ SI the men in the car appeared to reach for a weapon. The ambulance driver turned on his emergency lights and headed to the nearest police station. The car followed, and police hadn't far to go to arrest the occupants. • Between performances at » Edinburgh's Fringe Festival, Oscar, a Labrador retriever billed as the worlds only canine hypnotist, ran off. Reuters reported that the owner warned anyone seeing Oscar not to look him directly in the eye.

Duh

assaulting and intimidating J i uHappens pf/CHO <wo«.vuMMg luwiinMuuug a a Scientists have discovered the flight attendant in October while origin of feces: the so-called %ing Buenos Aires to New 1

After being hit in the head by a train, Robert Ricketts, 19, of Bowling Green, Ohio, told police that he was trying to see how close to the moving train he could place his head without being hit. Reach Out a Some One Police in Ogden, Utah, looking for the suspect who stole a pager, along with other items f r 0 m two cars, activated the pagers number. An hour later, their page was answered, and they ^^^ traced the call to a A W motel room, wHere V officers arrested a 13> year-old boy. • In Memphis, Tennessee, Donna McGee was listening to a police scanner she had gotten as a gift when she overheard a conversation over cordless telephones that turned out to be a murder plot. As other members of her family listened in on the conversation, McGee's daughter recognized the name of a playmate. Once the McGees realized the identity of the intended victim, they notified police, who investigated and charged their neighbor Jacqueline Lee Greene, 32, and Christopher Scott Davis, 21, with conspiring to murder James Kenneth Greene.

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Until then, according "to John first-class section saw Fi M,- Hayes of Indiana University, "with his pants and underwear the atmosphere had little oxygen. down defecating on a service cart Algae produced some while carused by the flight crew. Finneran ryine out photosynthesis, but then used linen napkins as toilet

posed by bacteria. Using fossil records, Hayes and his colleagues theorized that the sudden burst of evolutionary diversification gave rise to animals with mouths, guts and anuses that drifted in the ocean and excreted waste. Fecal pellets dense enough to reach the ocean bottom used little oxygen during decomposition, enriching the oxygen in the ea and the atmosphere. • In November, British farmer David Cannon of Newcastle sprayed four tons of cow manure on the offices of the National Westminster Bank. He explained that his five-year dispute with the bank had cost him $158,000 and that he acted "to let people know what these professionals can do to working-class people." The mess took two weeks to clean up, according to bank manager Alan Bell, who noted, "The effluent was too deep to walk into the bank unless you had waders on." • Investment banker Gerard Finneran, 58, was charged with

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vice implements used by the crew, Finneran also tracked feces throughout the aircraft." * The flow (urine, that is) from the visitors to the nation's two largest artificial lakes has polluted them, prompting officials from Arizona, Utah and the federal government to meet in October to discuss water quality. As many as 10,000 people a night camp along the beaches of Lake Powell and lake Mead. With only 64 toilets scattered along nearly 3000 miles of shoreline, some of the tourists go to the bathroom on the open shore. Others dump waste from portable toilets in the water or sand instead of waiting until they get to pumping stations. "I don't know what happens to people," said James Vanderford, chief of maintenance and engineering for-the Lake Mead National Recreation Area in Boulder City, Nevada. "They do their thing where they shouldn't. They leave their inhibitions and training at home. It's really crazy." •

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SCOPE, N O T HOROSCOPE I just wanted to say how much I've enjoyed Seven Days and, especially, watching it very swiftly grow from an entertainment review into something closely resembling the old Vanguard. It's literate, entertaining, has some concern with scope, and appears interested in reporting. The Vermont Times, by contrast, has become as perfunctory as the Free Press, and Vox is mostly a calendar, and I don't bother picking them up anymore. The only criticism I have is of the fullpage horoscope column, which seems to me a waste of space that might be filled to greater profit with almost anything else. Continuing good fortune with Seven Days., .'it brightens my Thursdays. — John Engels Burlington A

TAXING SITUATION The statement, "most people pay more property taxes than all other taxes combined" sure does conjure up comforting thoughts and feelings for me. For 20 years the town of Duxbury has "demanded" payment of outlandish property taxes from me to them with zero benefits in return. This tax scenario smacks of pre-Revolutionary War days when the cries of "unfair taxation without representation" by the colonists fell on deaf ears until the Boston Tea Party got British royalty's undivided attention. The rest is history. The politicians of today pretend to listen, but are not hearing the frustrated cries by "we

the people" for tax reform. My patience is worn out. I am fed up, outrageously livid and pushed over the taxation edge by inept and corrupt politicians and the quagmire they have produced and nurtured. Left with no other choice, I, for one, in the name of reform, do hereby secede from the town of Duxbury, Vermont and declare myself and property independent from their taxes and jurisdiction. You have to start somewhere, why not at the beginning? It is tea time. Does anyone want to party? — R. Peter Bertelson Bolton PIPING U P Contrary to your item in the "To Do List" of the November 29 issue, pipes are hardly "passe." Anthony Newman, still very much a period instrument specialist, has not "switched" to electronics. When I interviewed him the night before his VSO performance, Newman made clear that he in no way endorsed electronic organs over • pipe organs. The sad truth is that very few American concert halls contain pipes. Newman has chosen to bring music for organ and orchestra to a broader audience by using electronic where pipes are not available. Most world-class organists concertize in Europe, where fine instruments are plentiful. The pipes vs. electronics controversy is distinctly American. Newman is the only major artist using electronics to reach American audiences, and he has done so only in the past few years. He believes that digital technology has finally produced an instrument which is acceptable, but certainly not superior to a fine pipe organ. — Yvonne Grover South Hero Yvonne Grover is a music critic for the Burlington Free Press

S H O P P I N G W I T H THE K I N G OF KITSCH Art professor Ed Owre gives the gift of tack — to Newt Gingrich, David Letterman and the Hot Dog Lady By

Pamela

Polston

Technician of jazz guitar meets technician of laughter: Bill Frisellpays tribute to Buster Keaton By Mark M a d i g a n

Send to address above, or call for more info.

Retired math professor Ralph Preston follows his passion — with tweezers By Amy

Rubin

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1 was E-mailed the following story, ts there any way you could confirm this? "When Apoilo mission astronaut Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon, he not only gave his famous 'one small step for [a] man, one giant leap for mankind' statement, but followed it by several remarks - [mostly the] usual COM traffic between him, the other astronauts and mission control. Before he reentered the lander, he made the enigmatic remark, 'Good luck, Mr. Gorskyf "Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some rival Soviet cosmonaut. However, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian or American space programs. "Over the years many people have questioned [Armstrong] as to what the 'Good luck, Mr. Gorsky' statement meant. On July 5, in Tampa Bay, Florida, while answering questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26-year-old question to Armstrong. He finally responded. It seems that Mr. Gorsky had died aid so Armstrong felt he could answer the question. "When he was a kid Neil was playing baseball with his brother in the backyard. His brother hit a fly ball which landed in front of his neighbors' bedroom window. The neighbors were Mr. and Mrs. Gorsky. As he leaned down to pick up the ball, he heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky, 'Oral sex? Oral sex you want? You'll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!" - Ted Maas, via the Internet I couldn't reach Neil Armstrong, not that I killed myself trying. However, NASA denied this story categorically and, I might say, somewhat huffily. (The guy didn't so much as chuckle when I read it to him. Whatsamatfer, nobody appreciates a good blow-job joke anymore?) Finally, not that if proves anything, this apparently first showed up on the Internet on rec.humor. But I personally believe every word, dangling participles and all.

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Regarding my earlier column on the Social Register, Gregory Nigosian refers me to geographer Stephen Richard Higley's recent book, Privilege, Power, and Place: The Geography of the American Upper Class, which maps out where rich folks live based on their listings in the 1988 SR. Great book, not least because it explains what "dilatory domiciles" means: listings that the listees turned in too late to make it into the main book (DDs appear in the summer supplement), along with changes of address. Higley confirms what everybody suspected: The SR is heavily skewed toward old money and the East Coast. The seaboard states from Maine to Virginia account for two-thirds of the listings, with nearly one-third located in just two states, New York (5838) and Pennsylvania (4200). New money is grossly underrepresented. California has 2517 SR households, fewer than Massachusetts (3231), although it has five times the population. Texas has just 424 SR families. (It's hard to imagine Ross Perot at the polo club, although the '94 book lists several other Perots). At the bottom of the list is North Dakota with one SR family, no doubt the toast of Fargo. Higley does not have much useful advice on how you can get info the SR. (Evidently you can just apply, like you can probably just apply to be the Pope.) But he does point out that it's pretty easy to get kicked out. There were 38,000 families in the 1984 book, but a great purge the following year reduced that number by 3500, and more have hit theroadsince. Sad evidence of this comes from H.M., an SR listee from Chicago. H., who, according to his listing, is actually H. the third, got in because his mother's side married info a Mayflower family. But his four sisters were de-listed because they married members of the steerage crowd, thereby diluting the gene pool. His mom thinks he'll get the boot, too, once he marries his sweetie, whom H. rather ungallantly describes as NOXD - "not our kind, dear." If he doesn't, though, we might begin to see a suspicious pattern, know what I mean? We hope H. will keep us informed - CECIL ADAMS

can deliver (tie straight pope on topic. Write Cecil Adams at the Chicago Reader, 1 1 1 Illinois, Chicago, IL 60611, or e-mail him at cecil@chireader.com.

DAYS

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6,1995 -

Tlthea's Revenge

She's been kicked out of the Association of County Judges on a 27-0 vote, charged with perjury and found lacking in "judicial temperament, integrity and veracity." She's under investigation by the Judicial Conduct Board as well as«the board that keeps tabs on unethical lawyers, and she's facing impeachment by the legislature. She's the laughingstock of Chittenden County, perceived by many as a kook who has resorted to witchcraft, but guess what? Althea Kroger is still on the bench and she still has her fingers on the county purse. As you read this, Chittenden County officials are in the process of preparing a budget for the next fiscal year, which starts in February. The first public meeting on the county budget will be Monday night. But already there are strong signs that a disaster is in the works thanks to Althea the Hun. According to Eric Benson, the executive director of the Vermont Association of County Judges, "Chittenden County is on the road to a budget collapse." Benson says Althea the Hun is adamantly supporting a 33 percent increase in the county sheriff's budget (Called as a witness by Althea at the recent hearings, Sheriff Kevin McLaughlin testified to her "inquisitiveness" about the operation of the sheriff's department), and just as adamantly wants to do away with funding for her fellow assistant judge's health insurance. The problem is, only two people have the power to decide how county funds are spent — Elizabeth Gretkowski and Althea the Hun. Benson says the Association will work to get a bill through the legislature in January that will protect the county from the impending train wreck. It would permit the county to continue to operate under the previous year's budget in the event no new budget is adopted. Jeffords Bumped Again — Vermont's junior U.S. Senator Jim Jeffords should be in line for the chair of the Senate Labor and Human Resources Committee. After all, he is the ranking Republican and, with Committee Chair Nancy Kassebaum of Kansas not seeking re-election, the skids should be greased for good old Jeezum Jim, right? Wrong. Our Washington sources tell us that Vermont's maverick doesn't have a prayer. The word from Capitol Hill is the post will go instead to Indiana Senator Dan Coates, an old buddy of Dan Quayle. Jeffords and Coates both entered the Senate in 1989, though Jeffords was ranked above Coates. "It's not a technical violation of seniority," says UVM political science guru Garrison Nelson, "but it is a violation of the ranking." Nor will it be the first time Jeffords has been bumped. It happened when he was all set to be the ranking Republican on the House Agriculture Committee back in 1983. Instead, the Republican leadership brought in Ed Madigan of Illinois. The word is, Jeffords and his staff are well aware of the situation, though that didn't stop him from telling the Rutland Herald the other

december

6,1995

day, "I'm operating under the assumption I'm^ going to get the chairmanship." Sorry, James. Nelson says he thought Jimbo's pal Bob Dole "would protect him better." But Big Bob is busy running for president, and the number two Republican in the Senate, Trent Lott, happens to be a moral majority type and a Phil Gramm supporter to boot. With moderates like Kassebaum, Alan Simpson and Mark Hatfield dropping out of the Senate, says Garrison, "Jeffords isolation is only going to increase." The Wal-Mart Wars — Now that Wal-Mart's destined to open next summer out at Taft Corners, the real battle has begun. Stop and think for a moment. Who more than anyone dreads the arrival of the nation's retail giant in Chittenden County? That's right — Sears, K-Mart, Ames, etc. Sears has been at its present Shelburne Road location since 1965. Back then a 47,000square-foot store was a monster. Today it's a * midget. Sears Manager Bob Flowers tells Inside Track that Sears is "suffering from its space limitations." Flowers says "all options are being pursued," to deal with the impending landing of the Wal-Mart space ship. And that means moving to bigger digs. The question is, where? City Hall Follies — Burlington's Progressive Mayor Peter Clavelle had an interesting explanation the other day for his decision to hire the high-profile and quite controversial Montpelier lobbying firm of Kimbell & Sherman to represent his interests under the golden dome come January. You see, the problem is Kimbell & Sherman also represent such staunchly progressive concerns as Wal-Mart, Hydro Quebec and Las Vegas casino developer Eric Nelson. Since Burlington's Progs have long positioned themselves as the sole voice of truth and justice in the Queen City, hooking up with these particular hired guns presents a little public relations problem for da' mayor. But not to worry. The ever-crafty Clavelle had a beautiful spin on this one. "I view the decision by lobbyists to represent certain clients," said Pedro, "similar to the decision by attorneys to represent certain clientsH't's a professional decision. When you hire an attorney, do you ask, 'what rapists or murderers have you represented in the past?'" Enough said. The proof will be in the pudding, and if Kimjbell & Sherman can do as much for the Clavelle administration as they did for Eric Nelson, da' mayor will have a lot of explaining to do. Media Notes — The phone's been ringing off the hook this week because the natives are quite restless over at The Burlington Free Press. That's because the Freeps is instituting a new mandatory drug-testing policy for new hires. Current employees, we're told, will have to pee on demand if management suspects someone is under the influence. About time, some will say, since many readers have been of the opinion that the folks who put out that paper have been on drugs for years. Just kidding.

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HOT SHOT: Photo shoots and book signings. Writers dread them both. Except those lucky authors who end up sitting — or "writhing on the floor" — for ex- | Vermont photographer Marion Etdinger. "Aspiring novelists have asked her to take their pictures before they've even written books," New York Observer noted last week in the first story hailing Etdinger as the hippest — and most publicity-shy — literary photographer in New York. It also made mention of her recent appearance in a New York Times Magazine spread devoted to the heirs of the "beat" generation. And her very cool decision to skip a celeb-studded opening at the Whitney to hear "a rock band called The Cuts, formed by friends from Vermont." Only five years ago, Brooklyn-born Etdinger was still shooting music covers for theVanguard Press — though shed already started shooting for magazines and book jackets for Knopf, with subjects like Cormac McCarthy, Truman Capote and Ken Kesey. But she was reluctant to leave Vermont altogether, and kept a Church Street apartment for years after making the move to Manhattan. Even in New York, Ettlinger keeps a low profile. She avoids all cameras except her own — the head shot in the Observer was a rare exception. And she maintains a break-neck schedule full of reading, schmoozing and marathon photo shoots. One writer describes her black and white beauties as "intellectual pinups." Says Ettlinger, "Good looks don't make a good photograph." Good photographers do. EAT YOUR KAEL:

Middlebury deejay Jeff Kaufman is not your typical radio talk-show host. Formerly a pre-Tina Brown messenger at The New Yorker magazine, he was a housesitter for Janet Malcolm, a human punching bag for St. Clair McKelway, and a friend to film critic Pauline Kael, who, says Kaufman, "was kind enough to be nice to me." Last week he scored a telephone interview with Kael, who was full of holiday recommendations for 'good little movies that didn't get a lot of attention in the press:" Second Best, Before Sunrise, Cobb, High Tide, One False Move, Law of Desire. As usual, Kael offered delightfully unpretentious commentary on everything from Casino to Dumb and Dumber. Tune in to WFAD next Wednesday at 11 a.m. for the whole show.

"The perfect match for Keaton's movies...The music, in its studious avoidance of silent-movie music tradition, radicalizes films that could just as easily be viewed as simple slapstick." j i

-The New York Times

IN BRIEF: Middlebury College waited a long time for Susan Stockton — hiring committee members spent months scouring the country for a new director of the arts center. Six months after she took the job, Stockton appears to be easing out of it. She spends three days a week on campus, jhe other two working from home in New Hampshire. "Its not ideal," she concedes, noting she had "personal reasons" for not making the move to Middlebury. Her new "contract" comes up for review in February. Could be a long, cold one. . .Santa came through this year for the Jazz Mandolin Project. The local trio is playing post-Christmas at the Knitting Factory with Michael Ray and the Kosmic Krewe. The East Village club has hosted everybody from Thurston Moore of Sonic Youth to John Zorn and Bill Frisell. "We are really psyched," says mandolinist Jamie Masefield, calling the cutting-edge nightclub his "dream debut." The band plays Boston for the first time Thursday. . . "Little Mister Man" has landed, and it reads like a sick "Calvin" from outer space. Slave Labor Graphics printed the new one from Burlington cartoonist James Kochalka. Twenty diousand of them. Particularly whacky are the blurbs on the back. "What is the point of printing such idiocy? one reviewer commented. Another? "I'm waiting for everyone who's praised his work in print to suddenly admit it was all a joke." If anyone understands that any press is good press, it s our Superstar. . .Vermont writer Tom Paine is on a roll. Less than a year ago, he published a short story in The New Yorker. Last week the same piece eafned him an O. Henry the literary prize, not the oes candy bar. The winning word comes with a con+e me tract — his will be one of 20 stories in a prestigious anthology of short stories published this spring. With those credentials, who needs a masters? To say nothing of the weekly haul from New York to Charlotte. •

Live at Burlington's Flynn Theatre Friday, December 8, 8 p.m. For Tickets Call 86-FLYNN Bill Frisell's music for the films of Buster Keaton's movies is recorded on Noncsuch Records.

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NONESUCH

SEVEN

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rom

aniela

one day last week it occurs to me that a person with limited means and warped sense of humor — like me — would do well to shop for holiday gifts with Ed. And, of course, it would be fun. He agrees. But first, we need a hearty" breakfast. We go to the Oasis. Diners, after all, are the kitschiest of restaurants*. All that stainless steel makes me want to eat fried food. O n our way there, we begin to compose our must-buy-for list. In addition to significant others and a handful of friends who could appreciate — or tolerate — kitschmas presents, we come up with the following beneficiaries, for no particular reason: Bill and Hillary Clinton, Newt Gingrich, the Pope, Ann Landers, David Letterman, Little Richard, Peter Clavelle, Homer Simpson, Althea Kroger, Richard the Clarinet Man, the Hot Dog Lady, Rush Limbaugh, Miss Manners and Brad Pitt. The good thing about kitsch is you can give it to people you like and people you don't like. We've barely poked at our eggs and home fries when Ed informs me that he not only likes to buy things, he likes to buy presents for his things —like his car and his tools. "For example, gadgets to make my saw go faster," he explains. "I'm trying to be more efficient." This, I decide, is going to be an interesting day. Ed wasn't always a kitsch^ , : collector. It started four of five years ago when he felt compelled to buy some horrendous ceramic figures from the Salvation Army. "For some reason," he confesses, "I just couldn't pass them up." No 12step program could fend off his growing kitschoholism. Gradually Ed's collections took over his office, and finally graduated to its present shrine. One of the items is an oniondome jobbie from his wife's Bulgarian aunt. As he describes it, he sketches it on his napkin and paints its dome with Welch's grape jelly. "It was this really hateful craft item," he

d ecembe r

6 ,'1 9 9 5

says. "I gave it to Paul." That's Paul DeCausemacker, woodshop technician at the art department, with whom Ed later organized the Museum. " v Ed says he and his brother in St. Albans send each other kitsch, especially in the tool department. His latest acquisitions are a "rolling ruler" and a gun-like gizmo that slaps together two flyswatters, "But I don't like to kill flies," Ed says, "so I don't use it." Breakfast finished, we're off to shop. O n the way, Ed decides he wants to find an elephant brooch for Newt Gingrich. "I'll keep my eyes open," I say. Our first stop is Architectural Salvage on lower Maple Street, which for some reason is colder inside than out. I guess they haven't salvaged any woodstoves lately Ed spots a four-foot iron X with rings on each of its points. "I have a lot of X's in my work," he says, momentarily forgetting

Rockwell illustrations on the much money for the cards. It's $1.98. "Who shall we President," he says. He settles give this to?" I ask. "The on a $7 ceramic turtle planter Pope," he responds decisively. for his friend, fellow art profesWe take a quick spin sor Bill Davison. through the Salvation Army on "This is the second turtle North Winooski Avenue, and I've gotten him for his dashturn up the following: green board," Ed explains. "Does he boiled-wool socks for Ed's wife like turtles?" I ask innocently. "Hates 'em," Ed replies. "He hates all this crap. :§li| informs me that That's why I get it — to loosen him up."

not

only

lilies

down the street we discover generations of toys we missed out on, like a Rock 'Em Sock Em boxing game between Batman and The Penguin. Ed jumps on a colorful plastic assemble-your-own woodwind kit that looks like Plumbing 101. This, he announces, is for Richard the Clarinet Man. I throw in a fit Fisher-Price color-* coded xylophone to to luy expand his horizons. And I'm thrilled to find a mint-condition game to iuy of Clue for five bucks — for myself. I'm really things. getting into the kitschmas spirit now, is cjouuj andpick out a like-new . I bottle of bright red Wet

We dash across the street to Second Hand Rose. For things, fie iifces Hillary Clinton, Ed selects a pair of political-wife starpresents jbr his shaped earrings for $2.98. He finds suspenders for art J his, - j decide, prof Frank Owen, but balks when he learns they're f ;x' almost five bucks. After all, t be an interestinq dau. v wild naii polish for Frank's not the President. A " ^ Althea Kroger. And 98-cent Florida-souvenir tray Brenda; a Giants Superbowl since we've still not found an catches my eye, and Ed buys it elephant brooch, I grab a $1.49 for me. "It's always more fun to XXV cap and matching turnpirate sword for Newt to help shop for yourself," he concedes. bier for Bill Clinton; a pair of needlework ducks still in their him slash the budget. "The He spies a quartet of handhoops for the Museum; three price is right," approves Ed. made ceramic napkin rings. Danielle Steel paperbacks for They're clunky, brown, and Little Richard; a musty set of ^ \ ! ext we motor over to Two look like they belonged to the Women Traders in Flintstones. We i&mgL^ Time-Life books on American our mission. "What is it?" I history — in digestable Winooski, an antique store * think Jkm 20-year increments with high-quality but still ask. Without missing a beat he they're j^M affordable stuff. Nice ambience, — for Rush says, "It was an early rack used Kk tooj wliat with all those *'Z to stretch babies." i k cherubs. Among a shelf of dogWe come upon a perfect Kk gie bric-a-brac, Ed discovers an vintage pinball machine. "I ^ ^ Avon bottle cum Yorkshire terwould buy this in a second H B ^ rier with sequined eyes. "That's if I had a mansion," he Hk For Princess Di," he says. says, fiddling with the ^E&r We keep finding things knobs excitedly. Ed gets aniBH& for people not on our list. mated when he finds a particuLike the commemorative larly good treasure. "But $450 plate from the 71st — that's outta sight." H e annual convention of decides the game would be * the Association of a good present for Postmasters in Burlington Mayor Peter 1975. I want to Clavelle. "He could give that to Harry assign different slots to J » suggests Ed. r j eachu ward, at the Burlington Before our fingers go numb, Post Office. I he selects a $4 glass brick for remind Ed that we Ann Landers to look through still haven't found "to see the future." I wonder jjgiL anything for Brad if Ed realizes she's not a clairIM^^IL Pitt:- Brad's always voyant. '^^pl; been hard to buy for," O u r next stop is less Ed agrees. metaphysical: Dough Boys. But Two Women Little did I know that at this *' iu J l Traders provides inspiraPearl Street institution more tion for others: an than the doughnuts are glazed. , antique "walking" Popeye Owner Wilma Boutin has filled for Homer Simpson; a display case with her handan emaciated, ill-propor- 5 made ceramic items. Ed and I tioned figurine of "David" o immediately vie for the bust of V sv for art history professor Bill perElvis — until we find out it Lipke; a Canada-souvenir ^ fect for costs $55. "Oh, that's too candy dish for Ed's mother Miss dear," Ed says for the first of ^ — to be filled with her Manners. I note many times today. But this Limbaugh; favorite Canada mints; a > that thrift shops are Elvis is a beaut, and I seriously and a handmade print featuring two cats the repository of a lot of unsuc consider coming back later to wooden potty chair in the wearing ties for Ed's daughcessful clay and yarn projects. get it for the boyfriend. Ed shape of a rocking horse for ter; and, of course, lots of thinks it would be just the tick-, While Ed checks out the coats, David Letterman. "It could be things for ourselves. "This is a I locate an unopened Bridge et for Bill Clinton. "It's not too a planter," I suggest. . . * t , .. continued on r paqe 10 6 Giftpack with faded Norman At Janets 1 hingamajigs

litssf i

SEVEN DAYS

page

CROCODILE ROCK

Urbanity icc^n no 242 Main this Saturday what Newjerseys coolest electro-synth band Crocodile Shop, and city club deejays jejj""The Emperor" Johnson (NJ) arid Psychotrope (NY) join Burlingtons technoweirdcore unit }hexdumpl Its a digital-dance for all ages.

T H E BEST CLASSIC R O C K OF T H E '60S, 7 0 S A ® '80S T H E EAgfi.ES J A N I S JffPLIN THE W H O STEVE M I L L E R B A N D ELTON J O H N

WEDNESDAY

V E R M O N T ' S BEST V A R I E T Y OF CLASSIC ROCK 101.7

COMEDY NIGHT, Club Metronome, 8 p.m., $5. THE SKATALITES (jam^an ska), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m., $12. JOHN LACKARD BLUES BAND (blues), Buddah's Hard Rock Cafe, 9 p.m. No cover. HEARTATTACK WITH ROBERTO RENNA (DJ), 135 Pearl, 9 p.m., $3 under 21. THE ZEN DOGS (rock), Nectars, 9 p.m. No cover. ANDY TAYLOR (rock), Patches, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. No cover. OPEN MIKE ACOUSTIC JAM, Java Love, 8 p.m. No cover. OPEN MIKE (acoustic), Burlington Coffeehouse, City Market, 8 p.m. No cover. BLOOZOTOMY (blues), Alley Cats, 9:30 p.m. No cover. TODD FITCH (acoustic), Thrush Tavern, Montpelier, 9 p.m. No cover. BREAKAWAY (bluegrass), Sneakers, Winooski, 9 p.m., $2.

DESIRED EFFECT (jazz), Halvoisons, 9 p.m. No cover. OPEN MIKE, Cactus Cafe, 8 p.m. No cover. BNB, SAM'S PLANET (acid jazz, funk), Club Metronome, 9 p.m., $4. WIDE WAIL, IAIN, LIVING BREATH (alt rock), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m., $3/5. BUCK & THE BLACKCATS (rockabilly), Nectar's, 9 p.m. No cover. CRAIG MITCHELL (DJ), 135 Pearl, 9 p.m. No cover. ANDY TAYLOR (rock), Patches, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. No cover. RAY LEWIS (blues), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9:30 p.m. No cover. GORDON STONE TRIO (bluegrass-jazz), Last Elm, 9 p.m. Donations. TABLE WINE (alt-folk), Sneakers, Winooski, 9 p.m. $2. DAVID YOUNG & BILL MILLER (folk), Local Legends Coffeehouse, Daily Bread, Richmond, 7:30 p.m., $3.50. THE MANDOLINQUENTS (bluegrass), Mad Mountain Tavern, Waitsfield, 9:30 p.m. $1.

Available in fine record stores everywhere

FRIDAY

tor* j?

* 1

CLYDE STATS TRIO (jazz), Windjammer, 4 p.m. No cover. KID WITH MAN HEAD, JESUS NUT, SOUP SANDWICH, FUNBOX, BUBBLE (alt-rock, hardcore), 242 Main, 7 p.m., $4. MURALI CORYELL, Club Metronome, 9 p.m., $4. MOTEL BROWN, CONEHEAD BUDDHA, (funk), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m., $4/6. SUECONKLIN (blues-jazz), Samsara, 9 p.m. No cover. BUCK & THE BLACKCATS (rockabilly), Nectar's, 9:30 p.m. No cover. CRAIG MITCHELL (DJ), 135 Pearl, 9 p.m., $3/$5 under 21. DAVID BUDBILL (reading), Last Elm Cafe, 8 & 9:15 p.m. Donations. ANDY TAYLOR (rock), Patches, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. No cover. SMOKIN'GUN (rock), Wolf's Lair, Colchester, 9 p.m., $2. LAURA SIMON & THE SHADES OF BLUE (blues), Williston Coffeehouse, 8 p.m., $4. BLOOZOTOMY (blues), Charlie-o's, Montpelier, 9 p.m. No cover. MARY MCKENZIE & JULIET MCVICKER (acoustic), Deerleap Bookstore, Bristol, 7 p.m. No cover. THE PARKS DEPARTMENT (rock), Mad Mountain Tavern, Waitsfield, 9:30 p.m., $3.

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THURSDAY

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LIVE IRISH MUSIC, Speeder & Earl's (Pine St.), 2 p.m. No cover. ROSIE FLORES & WANDA JACKSON; '80S DANCE PARTY WITH DJ CRAIG MITCHELL, Club Metronome, 9 p.m., $3. STRANGEFOLK, NEW BROWN HAT (groove rock), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m., $5/7. DAVID KAMM (alt-banjo), Last Elm Cafe, 9 p.m. Donations. CROCODILE SHOP }HEXDUMP{ (electronic dance) WITH DJ JEFF JOHNSON AND DJ PSYCHOTROPE, 242 Main, 8 p.m., $3. BUCK & THE BLACKCATS (rockabilly), Nectar's, 9:30 p.m. No cover. DAN SHAW (DJ), 135 Pearl, 9 p.m., $3/$5 under 21. NERBAK BROS, (rock), Alley Cats, 9:30 p.m. No cover. ANDY TAYLOR (rock), Patches, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. No cover. SMOKIN' GUN (rock), Wolfs Lair, Colchester, 9 p.m., $2. CLANGERS (blues), Charlie-o's, Montpelier, 9 p.m. No cover. ROCKIN' DADDIES (rock), Mad Mountain Tavern, Waitsfield, 9: 30 p.m., $3.

GORDON STONE Gordon Stone - Banjo Jamie Masefield - Mandolin Stacey Starkweather Bass Jeff Salisbury - Drums Gene White Jr. Violin Paul Asbell - Guitar Dave Grippo-Alto Sax a l c a z a r M I ^ M ^ H F + i H H

Gordon Stone Trio

Thursday, December 7, 9 p.m. at the Last Elm Cafer Burlington

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

PATTI CASEY, BOB GAGNON & MATT MCGIBNEY (acoustic), Burlington Coffeehouse, City Market, 11 a.m. No cover. SUNDAY MASS WITH REV. CRAIG MITCHELL, Club Metronome, 9 p.m. No cover. RUSS & CO. (jazz), Nectar's, 9:30 p.m. No cover. MAGIC BUS (rock), Alley Cats, 9:30 p.m. No cover. JEAN CHARLES (classical guitar), Williston Coffeehouse, 11 a.m. No cover.

MONDAY

TUESDAY

WOMEN'S NIGHT, Last Elm Cafe, 8 p.m. Donations. CAPLETON, QUEEN CITY ALLSTARS, Club Toast, 9:30 p.m., $10. SPILL, TOKYO STORM WARNING (alt rock, hardcore), Club Metronome, 7 p.m., $10/12. OPEN MIKE WITH UVM'S BRIAN, JUSTIN & JOHN (acoustic), Java Blues, 7 p.m. Donations. SQUEALING SQUEALERS WITH ONE LOVE JAM (rock/reggae), Java Blues, 9 p.m. No cover. ALLEY CAT JAM (rock), Alley Cats, 9:30 p.m. No cover. SMOKEHOUSE (rock), Nectar's, 9 p.m. No cover.

FOLK JAM (acoustic), Last Elm Cafe, 8 p.m. Donations. &RISS0N & ABAIR (acoustic rock), Alley Cats, 9 p.m. No cover. FLASHBACK: HITS OF THE '80S (DJ), Club Toast, 9 p.m. No cover/$3 under 21. GROOVE LINE (live acid jazz), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. No cover. JALAPENO BROS, (rock), Nectar's, 9 p.m. No cover. PARI MA JAZZ BAND, Parima Thai Restaurant, 8 p.m. No cover. NIGHT OF A ZILLION POETS (open poetry festival), Java Love, 8 p.m. No cover. SNEAKERS JAZZ BAND, Sneakers, Winooski, 9 p.m., $2. HOODOO REVUE (blues), itches, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. No cover.

WEDNESDAY

GOV'T MULE, BIG SUGAR (groove rock), Club Toast, 9:30 p.m., $10. COMEDY, SAM'S PLANET (Rink, soul), Club Metronome, 10 p.m. No cover. JALAPENO BROS, (rock), Nectars, 9 p.m. No cover. HEARTATTACK WITH ROBERTO RENNA (DJ), 135 Pearl, 9 p.m., $3 under 21. OPEN MIKE, Burlington Coffeehouse, City Market, 8 p.m. No cover. OPEN MIKE ACOUSTIC JAM, Java Love, 8 p.m. No cover. JOHN LACKARD BLUES BAND (blues), Alley Cats, 9:30 p.m. No cover. ANDY TAYLOR (rock), Patches, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. No cover. DALE CAHILL & THE LOST NATION BOYS (bluegrass), Sneakers, Winooski, 9 p.m. $2. TIM CAIRA (acoustic), Thrush Tavern, Montpelier, 9 p.m. No cover. All clubs in Burlington

BAND page26

NAME

O F T H EW E E K :

SEVEN DAYS

unless otherwise

COLONCL

noted.

MUSTARD decernber

GAS 6,1995 -

Pamela

Polston

l BILL

FRISELL

n BAND/

BUSTER F R I D A Y ,

ROSIE BILLY

FLORES, ROCKAFILLYi Hight one, CD) —

Rosie Flores wears her heart on her sleeve, as it were: The CD's cover art — a child's crayon drawing of a girl with her guitar — hints that San Antonio Rosie made up her mind early in life to become a rock 'n' roll queen. She started an all-girl band at age 16, and has come a long way since: A star of the alt-country scene in Austin and L.A. for the past decade, Flores bops with the best of rockabilly retreaders, and is one of few women to do so. This month, a magazine with the youth vote, CM] New Music Monthly, oohed and aahed all over retro Rosie's latest. My guess, though, is that the reviewer has never listened to original '50s rockabilly firecrackers like The Collins Kids, nor, for that matter, the two sassy singers — now in their '60s — who dropped in for guest harmonies on Rockabilly Filly. Wanda Jackson and Jan is Martin. If she had, she might have written that Flores has spunk, plays a mean guitar solo, knows how to pick a good band and covers, and writes great tunes herself. But she might have tempered the praise, as I do, by suggesting that Flores is still hotter onstage than in the studio: The passion she reportedly pours into live shows is oddly manicured on most of these tracks — as if careful efforts to recreate an "authentic" sound polished the j.d. rawness that makes rockabilly rock. As if Flores just can't get over being born on the right side of the tracks. This quibble aside, Rockabilly Filly is still lots of fun; 13 "female Elvis" toe-tappin' bobby-soxin' tunes that are sure to drive a live audience of any age to the dance floor. Bring your sox to Metronome this Saturday for a test run. And by the way — Wanda Jackson is coming, too. Yahoo.

D E C E M B E R

A T

KEATCDN

P M

Drawing on jazz, rock, and country music, acclaimed j a z z / new music guitarist Bill Frisell plays his new scores for the screening of silent film star Buster Keaton's movies Go West, High Sign, and One Week.

What a perfect pairing: Frisell splendidly captures the essence ofKeaton." (CD

REVIEW)

S P O N S O R E D BY IN A S S O C I A T I O N WITH ^ ' 'J

FlYMM 153

MAIN

ST.

BURLINGTON

8D2.863.5966

v ± - v < ! • N n o • oo - o o - v i - v d • N n o- od- d o -V ± - v d • N n o

TABLE WINE, CALL MATT?? (self-released cassette) — At firsi I thought the title of this tape referred to someone 1 should ring up for more information. Like the band's manager, only they couldn't remember his last name. Like maybe the band's name hinted at some kind of induced dementia. But no. Call Matt??s\mp\y warns of Table Wine's warped sensibility, wherein silliness, sexual innuendo and toilet humor co-exist peacefully with self-deferential, satiric, story-with-a-moral and even political-message lyrics. On the other hand, the Burlington alt-folk duo which recently became a trio (with multi-instrumentalist Erek Ostrowski) can be over-serious and sentimental. In general, vocalist-guitarist Rebecca Padula leans toward the latter, while vocalist-bassist Christopher Burrage contributes unabashed goofiness — such as the tape's opener, "Puppet," which includes the line, "I love to dance when there's a hand in my pants." The acoustic production on Call Matt?? \s appropriately clean and spare, and recorded in part at Padula and Burrage's alma mater, St. Michael's College. It captures Padula's voice as a pleasant, smoky soprano, but shrills out a bit on the high notes. Burrage contributes a quirky baritone and snaky bassage. Formed in 1991, the all-original duo/trio has charmed its way onto the coffeehouse circuit, and arrives this Thursday for Sneakers' "Local Color" series. The band promises free tapes while they last.

Want t o g e t r e v i e w e d i n SEVEN i n f o and p h o t o t o S o u n d A d v i c e .

FOR INFO OR DEMO, C A L L 425-2178.

DAYS? Send y o u r CD o r t a p e ( n o d e m o s , p l e a s e ) , SEVEN DAYS, P . O . Box 1 1 6 4 , B u r l i n g t o n , VT 0 5 4 0 2 .

RAUNCH D R E S S I N G

Big Sugar does the same thing with blues that '60s-era British aficionados like Cream did: play up the grit, the growl and the volume. Think Howlin' Wolf with a Marshall stack. When the quartet-based bottleneck-blues band opens for Gov't Mule next week, Warren Haynes will have a tough act to follow. The Les Paul-wielding guitarist for the All man Brothers returns with his own roadtested power trio — also in the vein of superamped, blistering blues but with a southern drawl. Next Wednesday at Toast.

december

6,1995

SEVEN

DAYS

i^-r-

ADVANCE

Advance Music Centre 75 Maple Street, Burlington, VT05401 863-8652 in VT 800-660-8652 page 9

teasct Aromacoio^ AustraQa.

soaps

and candies from

&reet\[eaf fresh

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robes and

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pajamas.

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^ H o u r s : £ K p n . - c T f t u . 10 2Fri.

& Sat.

Sun.

scents.

5:30

10-8:00 11 - 5 : 0 0

O t h e r hours b^ appointment 46 Main Street,

MiddUSury,

VT.05753

800-300-1204

SHOPPING continued

from

page

wonderful store," Ed enthuses. "I'd come here first for people I really cared about." This shopping thing is getting a little tiring, but Ed insists on an excursion to Sam's Liquidation Center in Williston. When we get there, I immediately realize we should have come here first: Sam's requires a fresh head of steam. There are acres of shelves of all kinds of stuff, from hardware to damaged breakfast cereal. I start to feel overwhelmed, but Ed is gamely picking through the threefor-a-dollar bin, where we find a thoughtful gift for the Hot Dog Lady — a weenie-dog ashtray — and an inexplicable foam-rubber snowman head with Santa hat. That's Museum-quality. Now Ed's waxing rhapsodic over rows of steel wrenches from China, but concedes he'd rarely use them. "Just knowing they're here is enough," he say s. We move on to the video section, where I spot a musthave for George Bush: a movie titled Defying the World about Saddam Hussein. "We should remind him why he's retired," I suggest helpfully. Just after picking up a giant street broom with bristles the size of twigs for Frank Owen — "because he likes to sweep" — Ed needs to use the men's room. He disappears, arms heaped with goodies, while I browse among some really heinous ceramic stuff. Now we're cooking with gas, I think, when suddenly Sam starts yelling. "Hey, where are you going? Put that stuff over here! What are you trying to go into a locked room for? It's down the hall to the left!" Ed reappears, looking contrite. "Sam scolded me,' ' he whispers as he heads down the hall to the left. Meanwhile, I find a green ceramic parakeet with big glasses and a bow tie. Would Brad Pitt like this? Exhausted, Ed and I check out, and he graciously compliments Sam on the nice clean bathroom. On the way home, we review our purchases with satisfaction. He thinks I need to buy my car a present, and tries setting the turtle on my dashboard. Unfortunately, it's got a 45-degree angle. "I'm afraid it would fly off of there every time I stopped," I protest. "You just can't be so practical with this stuff," Ed retorts. When shopping for kitsch, I've learned, you've got to leave your Inner Mother at home. Now can I show you my list? •

SEVEN

DAYS

.deceinber

<6, 1 9 9 5

DOUBLE FEATURE Pianist Thelonious Monk once said a good jazz musician should know how to "play the silences," and no one used the spaces between notes to better effect than he did. When it comes to playing the silents, though, the master is guitarist Bill Frisell — who counts Monk among his strongest influences. Frisell will perform his original scores to three of Buster Keaton's presound-era films, The High Sign, One Week and Go West, this Friday at the Flynn. The show celebrates the 100th anniversary of film and of Keaton's birth. Frisell and his longtime bandmates, bassist Kermit Washington and drummer Joey Barron, will provide the music, while Keaton's work will be

screened above them onstage. The trio will coordinate their playing with the images by watching video monitors. In a telephone interview from his home in Seattle, Frisell commented on the logistical challenges of the Keaton project. "We actually set up a video camera that's focused on the screen, and that feeds the video monitors we watch," he said. "We'll be playing - with our backs to the screen. Sometimes Joey will even use a mirror facing directly backwards." The Frisell-Keaton project pairs two extraordinary artists. It is also unusual because, of course, one of the duo is long deceased. Frisell began to make his reputation as a sought-after accompanist soon after graduating from Boston's jazz-guitar hotbed, the Berklee

School of Music, in the late '70s. Fluent in blues, rock and country as well as jazz, he's performed and recorded with artists as diverse as Ginger Baker, Marianne Faithfull and Allen Ginsberg. Frisell's contributions to drummer Paul Motian's group established his credentials on the jazz scene in the early '80s. Since then, his work as a leader has garnered raves. One critic went so far as to call him "the single most important guitarist in jazz." Frisell's playing, particularly on electric, is distinguished by its sophisticated sense of melody, stylistic eclecticism and dynamic range. Keaton's place in the pantheon of comic actors is

look

w h a t

y o u ' l l

f i n d

L! N

I V F » S I T V

s y fCV* . fV

matched * * only by that of his contemporary, Charlie Chaplin. The son of vaudeville performers, he launched a prolific cinematic career in 1917 as a threeyear-old. In the '20s, he made 31 short and feature-length films, the best of which is marked by a skillful juxtaposition of humor and melancholy. Keaton's character is typically a

V E R M

N T

FOCUS S P U I N G 1496 C O U R S E

C A T A L O G

From advanced painting to beginning calculus, you will find a variety of courses in this spring's Focus catalog — The University of Vermont's comprehensive guide to Continuing Education. And in addition to the numerous course offerings described in Focus, you can also learn about many other resources and opportunities available through UVM's Division of Continuing Education. Whether it's the certificate program in Gerontology, the Summer Writing Program or Evening University and the Guaranteed Admission Program, when you open up a copy of Focus you open yourself up to a world of exciting new possibilities. All of which take place at The University of Vermont, a school that for nearly 200 years has provided students with a stimulating and challenging educational environment. So be on the lookout for the latest edition of Focus, or call 1-800-639-3210 to schedule an appointment with one of our Continuing Education advisors. Because when you take a look through Focus, things could really start taking * shape for you.

decerpber

6 * 199,5

lonely '

roman

tic who absorbs frustrations and failure but carries on with stoic persistence. It is Keaton's emotional depth that appeals to Frisell. "I had just thought of him as a really physical, slapstick, funny guy," the guitarist said. "What emerged after I got into it a little more was a darker side — that actually outweighs the funny stuff. There's a really sad Continued

on back

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MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE

Retired math professor Ralph Preston follows his passion — with tweezers

alph Preston is an armchair shrinks delight. W h e n he was barely old enough to walk, he loved to curl up under cardboard boxes. As a kid, he dug tunnels for himself in the backyard. As he explains it, "I was enchanted by enclosed spaces." He still is. Now 69, the Hinesburg resident is one of those mysteriously motivated creative souls who finds solace in that most anal of artistic pursuits: building ships in bottles. Yes, people really do still do that. Not many people — about 400 in the United States — but they're out there, snipping tiny sail lines with cuticle scissors, crafting pin-sized masts. W h a t drives them? T h e lure of the sea? A return-to-thewomb fixation? "It's a different world in the bottle," Preston says. "I think I'm putting myself in the bottle. It's comfortable in there." A retired math professor from St. Michael's, Preston is Vermont's sultan of small-scale. Mini whalers, clippers, schooners, galleons — complete with historically-accurate colors and thumbnail-sized crew members in period dress — have been Preston's painstaking pride for over half a century. As far as he knows, he's the only

bottleship builder left in the state. Internationally known for his lectures on the craft, and for over 200 models in private homes and museums around the world — his closest commission was from the Coast

forehead, high-intensity lamps shining and enough bass wood "to last me 50 years" at the ready, Preston spends five days a week in one of the two shops in his home. O n e shop is exclusively for power tooling — to

His love of restrictive spaces aside, Preston has never let himself be fenced in. He came "yay close" to a Navy court martial in World War II for telling off a commanding officer. His first job, as a product developer for a major electronics company, ended when "I was ordered to commit fraud and told 'em to go to hell." Old bosses and commanders are now immortalized — in bottles. They served as models for some of Preston's tiny sailors, eternally keeping his ships afloat. Born in the land-locked Northeast Kingdom, Preston grew up building model airplanes and reading about the sea. At 13, he tried his hand at a bottleship — the Normandy. It was a crude attempt, but he was hooked. By high school, he was ordering model plans by mail. Before long, he was doing his own research and finding mistakes in museum-published plans.

"It's a wild piece of architecture," Preston explains. "It doesn't fit any category." Preston takes pride in eluding categorization — even in his shipbuilding approach. It's hard to imagine anything more -o disciplined o than building ° a ship at oneis hundredth the ^ original size, ^ precisely cuts ting it apart, == then reassemo

AVAST! The battleship, steady as she goes Guard Academy in New London, Connecticut — Preston can imagine nothing more pleasant than a good fourhour stretch at his work bench. With a homemade fivepower magnifier strapped to his

restrict sawdust — the other is for hand work, where 90 percent of his cutting and carving is done. If pressed, he'll admit he built both shops. Oh, and he also built his house: two Aframes joined in a cruciform.

% bling it piece5 by-piece with long-handled tweezers inside a 19-gallon spherical laboratory flask. But to listen to Preston describe it, this procedure sounds less like a painstaking operation than an act of rebellion. "I have my own beliefs," he says. "Traditionalists build the ship outside the bottle, fold it like an umbrella, insert it in the bottle and unfold it. In art, you go setting rules and you're on very thin ice. You fence yourself in."

Preston's mechanic father approved of his son's hobby. Young Ralph was even allowed to use his dad's shop to make the model-building tools he still uses. But there was another hobby his father and schoolteacher mother didn't know about. He was sneaking out of Continued

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O Wednesday m u s i c PERCUSSION C O N C E R T : A student ensemble plays under the direction of Tom Toner. U V M Recital Hall, Burlington, 8 p.m. Free. Info, 656-3040.

d a n c e C O N T A C T IMPROV: Gravity plays a crucial role in a kinetic free-for-all. Memorial Auditorium Loft, Burlington, 7:15 p.m. $1. Info, 860-3674.

t h e a t e r 'SPEED T H E P L O W : Rachel Beddoe, A1 Salzman and Dennis McSorley perform in this "morality play" by David Mamet. See review, this issue. 135 Pearl, Burlington, 8 p.m. $6-15. Info, 6600869.

. e t c TRAVEL INDUSTRY C O N F E R ENCE: Business owners, managers and employees discuss how to cater to Vermont-bound travelers. Catch the last day of two-day conference at the Radisson Hotel, Burlington, 8:30 a.m. 5 p.m. $55. Register, 253-7287. BRIDAL FASHION HISTORY: A Dartmouth College costume designer covers the history and etiquette of bridal fashion. Fleming Museum, UVM, Burlington, 12:15 p.m. $2. Info, 656-0750.

thursday m u s i c

A M A H L & T H E N I G H T VISITORS': The college choir performs the one-act opera by Gian-Carlo Menotti. Concert Hall, Middlebury College Center for the Arts, 8 p.m. Free. Info, 388-MIDD.

t h e a t e r 'SPEED T H E PLOW': See December 6. 'MAMA DRAMA': The relationship of women to their mothers, children, friends and uteruses is the subject of a college comedy. Mann Hall, Trinity College, Burlington, 8 p.m. Free. Info, 872-2738.

a r t DRAWING SESSION: Artists get inspiration from a live model at this weekly drawing session. Artspace, Burlington, 6:30-9:30 p.m. $5. Info, 862-2898.

iv c

r d s

POETRY READING: Cora Vail Brooks, whose verse play was performed Off Broadway, reads at Cover-To-Cover Bookstore, Randolph, 7 p.m. Free, Info, 728-4206.

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Hinesburg Elementary School Library, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 482-2484. SAFETY SEAT EVALUATIONS: Car accidents are the leading cause of death for children under five — and car seats are far from foolproof. Certified inspectors show you how to secure your bundle of joy. Almartin Volvo, Shelburne, 3-6 p.m. Free. Info, 985-1030. STORIES: Kids aged two-and-ahalf to three-and-a-half hear tales at the Fletcher Library, Burlington, 11-11:30 a.m. Three-and-a-half to six year olds list e n 10-10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. f SINGLE PARENTS NETWORK: V Single parents and their children gather for community and discussion. Middle School, S. Burlington, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 863-6613. PARENTS ANONYMOUS: Terrible twos or teens? Get support for parenting while your kids play next door. I Burlington, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info, 800-6394014.

etc ARTS FUNDING FORUM: How should the Vermont Council on the Arts cope with federal budget cuts? Public feedback follows a focus group presentation. Conference Room 2B, State Office Building, 108 Cherry St., Burlington, 10 a.m. - 1 p.m. Free. Info, 800-545-5713. HUMAN RIGHTS PROGRAM: Amnesty International shows a film on The Universal Declaration of Human Rights and one on the arrest of student activists worldwide. Burlington City Hall, 7-8:30 p.m. Free. Info, 864-4838. T H E FRENCH PRESENCE': Professor Andre Senecal looks back to the French and Indian War in a historical talk on the "French Presence in the Champlain Valley." Special Collections Department, Bailey-Howe Library, UVM, Burlington, 4-6 p.m. Free. Info, 656-2005. NOW MEETING: Women meet to organize around feminist issues, including images of women, voter education and economics. Memorial Room, Montpelier, City Hall, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 229-9588. OUTRIGHT MEN'S GROUP: Gay and bisexual men under 23 talk about their issues. Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 865-9677. CANCER SUPPORT GROUP: People dealing with cancer get support based on the work of the National Wellness Communities. Cancer Wellness Center, Chace Mill, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Register. 865-3434.

O friday music 'CHRISTMAS SPIRITUALS': Robert DeCormier leads a concert of carols, cantatas and spirituals entitled, "Shout for Joy." Tenor Wayne Hobbs is the featured

soloist. Cathedral of St. Paul, Burlington, 8 p.m. $6. Info, 658-3794. 'MESSIAH': The Vermont Philharmonic is joined by the Barre Choraleers and the Campus Choraleers of Norwich University in a traditional holiday rendering of Handel's Messiah. St. Augustine's Church, Montpelier, 8 p.m. $10. Info, 476-8188.

t h e a t e r 'SPEED T H E P L O W : See December 6, 7 p.m. 'HOLLYDAZE': The Champlain Arts Theatre Company celebrates the season with multicultural traditions, participatory games and singing for all ages. Shelburne Town Hall, 6 p.m. $5. Info, 860-3611. 'SEASON'S READINGS': The Champlain Arts Theatre Company performs music, songs and literature, from the The Miracle of the Menorah to The Gospel According to St. Luke. Shelburne Town Hall, 8 p.m. $5. Info, 860-3611. 'LAUGHING WILD': Two on-the-edge survivors from our crazed end of the century present a comic world view. Students perform the work of Christopher Durang at Hepburn Zoo Theatre, Middlebury College, 8 p.m. $1. Info, 388-MIDD.

f i l m BILL FRISELL BAND: The acclaimed jazz guitarist and his band play new scores to three silent films by vaudeville comedian Buster Keaton. Flynn Theatre, Burlington, 8 p.m. $12-19.50. Seven Days' film critic Barry Snyder lectures on Keaton at 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 863-5966.

iv c r d s DAVID BUDBILL: To benefit the antiprofit cafe, the writer-editor reads from Little Acts of Kindness, Selected Writings of Roland Robinson and Judevine. Last Elm Cafe, Burlington, 8 & 9:15 p.m. Donations. Info, 658-7454. PEARL HARBOR POETRY: A group of local poets who call themselves AntiAtomic Flying Zero Kamikaze Warriors read their works in commemoration of Pearl Harbor Day. Cafe NoNo, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 6557061.

etc BLOOD DRIVE: The Red Cross recycles your "gift of life." Burlington City Hall,

• •

2 . CREATIVE CUTS: The Vermont Council on the Arts stands to lose about half its federal funding next year. Time to get creative about cultural funding. Coping with cuts, or "reconsidering priorities," is the purpose of a Thursday focus forum in Burlington. Bring your bright ideas — or a blank check.

c r d s

RAILROAD BOOK: Robert Jones discusses his latest book on the Central Vermont Railway. Better Planet, St. Albans, 2-3:30 p.m. Free. Info, 5246835. ARCHER MAYOR SIGNING: The Vermont author signs his latest mystery, The Dark Root, and the paperback edition of The Fruits of the Poisonous Tree. See review, this issue. Vermont Book Shop, Middlebury, 10 a.m. - noon. Free. Info, 388-2061.

HOOFING IT: So much for the lonely runner. Participants in the annual Reindeer Ramble get roped into running — literally. It takes eight sets of hooves to make a Santa-Pede, a costumed team of seven reindeer runners with Santa bringing up the rear. Check out the aerobic team work, Sunday in Essex Junction.

k i d s SAFETY SEAT EVALUATIONS: See December 7, 10 a.m. - 3 p.m. STORY TIME: Kids over three listen up at the Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216.

music VERMONT SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA: Kate Tamarkin leads a Boston Pops-style concert of holiday favorites with choral conductor Robert De Cormier. Flynn Theatre, 8 p.m. $26. Info, 864-5741. JOHN HIATT: The songwriting guitarist plays in support of his new album, Walk On. Memorial Auditorium, Burlington, 8 p.m. $27-33.40. Info, 863-5966. CHORAL CONCERT: The Lamoille Choral Society joins the North Country Chorus for three sacred works by Purcell. Stowe Community Church, 8 p.m. $8. Info, 586-2273.

etc HOLIDAY STUDIO SALE: See December 8. CHRISTMAS FESTIVAL: See December 8, 10 a.m. - 5 p.m. MUSEUM RECEPTION: See December 8. A free open house is held 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. 'BEIJING & BEYOND': Films, talks and workshops explore the subject of women's rights. Billings Theater, UVM, Burlington, 9:30 a.m. - 4:30 p.m. Donations. Info, 864-0430. HOLIDAY CRAFT SALE: Pottery, clothing, jewelry and blown glass make great gifts. Drop a few dollars on local art at the anti-capitalist Last Elm Cafe, Burlington, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. Free. Info, 658-7458. 'HANGING OF T H E GREENS': Share legends and traditions of Christmas in music, story and song. First Congregational Church, Burlington, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 862-5010. GLASS BLOWING DEMO: Craftspeople manipulate molten glass at this studio open house and sale. Church & Maple Glass Studio, 225 Church St., Burlington, 10 a.m. - 5 p.m. Free. Info, 863-3880.

dance CONTRA DANCE: Ruth Sylvestre calls for Dent de Lion at a family-oriented folk dance. Holly Hall, Bristol, 8 p.m. $5. Info, 453-4461.

t h e a t e r 'SPEED T H E PLOW: See December 6, 7 p.m. 'LAUGHING WILD': See December 8, 3 & 8 p.m. ' N I G H T FIRES': Three tribes lay claim to one spot in this multi-cultural solstice performance. The music comes from India, the Middle East, Africa and contemporary U.S. Unitarian Church,

SAF£ SCATS: Child

"safety sears" are not all they're cracked up to be — 90 percent have some sort of problem, according to highway police in Vermont. Almartin Volvo sponsors free safety checks, and holiday kid vids, this weekend at its Shelburne showroom. It's the next best thing to strapping Junior into a Volvo.

STUDIO SALE: The Art Resource Association offers original fine art at affordable prices. City Center, Montpelier, 10 a.m. - 5 p.m. Free. Info, 229-0446.' CLAY STUDIO SALE: A dozen artisans exhibit their clay jewelry, clocks, wind chimes and pots. Vermont Clay Studio. Montpelier, 3:30-6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 223-4220. ARTIST SESSION: Artists and photographers get a new angle on their art with a live model. 150 Elm St., Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 229-5253.

O Saturday

k i d s SAFETY SEAT EVALUATIONS: See December 7. 'WALK SOFTLY': Chuck Jameson leads youngsters from eight to 13 on a hike and nature observation. Community Center in Jericho, 2:30 p.m. Free. Register, 899-4717. SONGS & STORIES: Robert Resnik entertains kids of all ages. Fletcher Library, Burlington, 11-11:40 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216.

to do list

Burlington, 7:40 p.m. $8. Info, 8631024. ' T H E LITTLE PRINCE': Theatreworks stages the charming planetary tale at Fuller Hall, St. Johnsbury Academy, 8 p.m. $8.50. Info, 800-805-5559.

11 a.m. - 3 p.m. "Donations." Info, 6586400. HOLIDAY STUDIO SALE: Check out hundreds of artistic bargains by Jude Bond, Ellen Spring, Sally Duval, Dianne Shullenberger and Carol Feirabend. Fire Robin Puppet Studio, Bridge Street, Richmond, 9 a.m. - 6 p.m. Free. Info, 434-3133. CHRISTMAS FESTIVAL: Forty juried crafters and the U.S. Bobsled Team entertain at the Vermont Teddy Bear Company, Shelburne, 3-8 p.m. Free, but bring a can of food to donate. Info, 800985-3001 x 4357. MUSEUM RECEPTION: "Holiday warmth" is the theme of this exhibit featuring quilts, coverlets and bed warmers. Sheldon Museum, Middlebury, 5-7 p.m. $12.50 p.m. Info, 388-2117. 'FEED YOUR NEIGHBOR': Donate much-needed non-perishable protein to a Seven Days-sponsored food drive. Price Chopper, Williston Road, S. Burlington, 4-7 p.m. Info, 864-CCTA. OUTRIGHT SUPPORT GROUP: Gay, lesbian, bisexual and "questioning" youth are invited to an ongoing support group meeting. Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 865-9677. SENIOR SWIM: Folks over 50 exercise in an 86-degree pool. YMCA, Burlington, noon - 2 p.m. Free. Info, 862-9622.

WARM FUZZ1 £ S: Imagine winter in Vermont without central heating. Pre-Gortex skiing. Cold nights sans duvet. Holiday warmth is the theme of an exhibit of quilts, lap robes and other historic warming devices this weekend at the Sheldon Museum. The candlelight preview is Friday night.

5 . ALL-CLUJAH: When it comes to holiday tradition, the Messiah is right up there. All we like sheep need our annual allelujahs. Comfort ye during the hectic holiday season with a sing-a-long Tuesday at the Cathedral of St. Paul. T h e Burlington Oratorio Society "handels" the hard parts.

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continued

ARTS & CRAFTS H O L I D A Y CRAFTS: Saturday, December 9. Shelburne Craft School. Clay Ornaments, 10:30 a.m. - noon. $30. Holiday Greeting Cards for foJks over nine, 1-2:45 & 3-4:45 p.m. $26. Register, 985-3648. Resident artists teach hands-on.

CAREER 'LOVING Y O U R J O B ' : Thursday December 7, 7-9 p.m. Career Networks, Burlington. $20. Register, 862-5483. If you want to change jobs but can't, learn to love the one you're with. CAREER C H A N G E : Tuesday, December 12, 7-9 p.m. Trinity College, Burlington. Free. Register, 800-6398885- Where to begin? Get tips from the admissions office.

COMPUTERS INTRO TO COMPUTERS: Wednesday, December 6, 6-8 p.m. Department of Employment & Training; or Thursday, December 7, 7:20 p.m. Burlington College. Free to Old North End residents. Register, 860-4057. I N T E R N E T T R A I N I N G : Saturday, December 9, noon - 2 p.m. Old North End Community Technology Center, Burlington. Free to Old North End residents. Register, 860-4057.

DANCE M O D E R N - J A Z Z D A N C E : Slowintermediate adults, Tuesdays 7-8:30 p.m. Intermediate-advanced adults, Wednesdays 6:30 p.m. Olympiad, S. Burlington, $9. Info, 985-5216. jane Selzer leads an ongoing class.

SPIRIT M E D I T A T I O N : First & third Sundays, 10 a.m. - noon. Burlington Sharnbala Center. Free. Info, 658-6795- Non-sectarian and Tibetan Buddhist practices are taught.

LIST JOUR CLASS: Follow the format including a live to 15 word decriptive sentence. Mail or walk it in, with $5 for one week or $15 jjor a month, by the Thursday before publication. Free classes are listed without charge.

from

page

CRAFT O P E N H O U S E : Resident artists and craftspeople show and sell their pottery, weaving, woodwork, paper and painting. Shelburne Craft School, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. Free. Info, 985-3648. HOLIDAY FESTIVAL: Pete Sutherland leads a sing-along while you shop for crafts, snacks and educational toys. Lake Champlain Waldorf School, Shelburne, 10 a.m. - 3 p.m. Free. Info, 985-2827. S N O W S H O E O R HIKE: Bring lunch and warm clothes on a hike along the Honey Hollow Trail. Meet in Montpelier, 9 a.m. Free. Register, 223-7126. CARRIAGE RIDES: Horse-drawn carriages give rides on the Church Street Marketplace, Burlington, noon - 4 p.m. Free. Info, 863-1648. VEGETARIAN MEAL: Food Not Bombs dishes out a free meal. Come at 9:30 a.m. to help cook or 12:30 p.m. to eat. Last Elm Cafe, Burlington. Free. Info, 865-0622.

etc

Sunday music

'MESSIAH': See December 8, Barre Opera House, 4 p.m. CAROLLING: The Quarter Notes set the tone for holiday shopping on the Church Street Marketplace, Burlington, noon - 3 p.m. Free. Info, 863-1648. ' N O W E L L SING W E CLEAR': Traditional British and U.S. holiday tunes, plus a Kentucky "Mummers Play," encourage audience participation. First Congregational Church of St. Albans, 2 p.m. $7.50. Info, 524-1507. HOLIDAY C H O I R C O N C E R T : "Lessons and Carols" are performed under the direction of Emory Fanning. Mead Chapel, Middlebury College, 4:30 & 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 388-MIDD. C H R I S T M A S C O N C E R T : The Randolph Singers make a choral offering to the community at Chandler Hall, Randolph, 3 p.m. Free. Info, 728-9133.

d a n c e M E N ' S TEA DANCE: The Mens Health Project presents the third annual "Ho H o H o m o for the Holidays," complete with buffet, prizes and surprises. 135 Pearl, Burlington, 7-10 p.m. Free. Info, 863-2437.

theater 'A C H R I S T M A S CAROL': The musical adaptation of Dickens' classical novel features period costumes, lavish sets and elaborate special effects. Flynn Theatre, Burlington, 7 p.m. $12-25.50. Info, 8635966. A U D I T I O N : Big City Players is looking for two young adult men for a February production about life in the time of AIDS. Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 863-5884.

C H R I S T M A S FESTIVAL: See December 8, 11 a.m. - 4 p.m. MUSEUM R E C E P T I O N : See December 8. A free open house is held from noon to 4 p.m. HOLIDAY CRAFT SALE: See December 9, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. GLASS BLOWING D E M O : See December 9. EARLY AMERICAN CELE BRATION: Contra dancing, ornament-making, hot drinks by the hearth. Old-time wintertime amusements make the holiday historic at the Ethan Allen Homestead, Burlington, 1-4 p.m. $4. Info, 865-4556. MEN'S MEETING: Men Alive welcomes all men looking for a safe place to •be. Bishop Booth Conference Center, Rock Point, Burlington, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 8652247.

-Fri, 7-

11 ill

crds

POETRY DISCUSS I O N : Judith Chalmer leads a discussion of New England poetry at the Kellogg Hubbard Library, Montpelier, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 223-3338.

t h e a t e r ' N I G H T FIRES': See December 9, Unitarian Church, Montpelier. A U D I T I O N : See December 10.

kids

kids STORYTIMES: Three-and-a-halfto five-year-olds hear stories at the South Burlington Library, 9:30 a.m. Those four through six listen up at 3:30 p.m. Free. Register, 658-9010.

etc

BLOOD DRIVE: See December 8, Vermont NIGHT LIGHT: A Siberian shaman Department of Health, 108 stars in Night Fires — a contempo- Cherry St., Burlington, 10 rary solstice play of light and dark. a.m. - 2 p.m. Experience the precursor of Christmas, H O U S I N G Hanukkah, Divali and Kwaanza C O O P MEETING: Find out Saturday at the Unitarian Church how easy it is to in Burlington, Tuesday at the earn equity and Unitarian Church in Montpelier. co-own your own building. Coop Federation, 279 N. Winooski Ave., C H R I S T M A S O P E N H O U S E : Turn • Burlington, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 862back a century, and tour a museum 5430. decked out for Christmas. Rokeby W O O D B U R Y COLLEGE I N T R O : Museum, Ferrisburgh, 1-4 p.m. Free. Free sessions showcase adult paralegal, Info, 877-3406. mediation, prevention and community M U S E U M O P E N H O U S E : Holiday development programs. Woodbury crafts, music and decorations adorn the College, Montpelier, 5:30-9 p.m. Free. Fairbanks Museum & Planetarium, St. Register, 800-639-6039. Johnsbury, 1-4 p.m. Free. Info, 748T E E N HEALTH CLINIC: Teens get 2372. information, supplies, screening and PFLAG M E E T I N G : Parents and Friends treatment for sexually-related problems. of Lesbians and Gays meet at the First Planned Parenthood, Burlington, 4-7 Baptist Church, Burlington, 2 p.m. Free. p.m. Pregnancy testing is free. Info, Info, 863-4285. 863-6326.

' T O G E T H E R READ': Kids in fourth, fifth and sixth grades read and discuss A Question of Trust with their parents. S. Burlington Library, 6:30-7:30 p.m. Free. Register, 658-9010. STORY T I M E : Listen at Children's Pages, Winooski, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 655-1537.

etc S P E C T R U M O P E N I N G CELEBRAT I O N : The new shelter and multi-service center for homeless, runaway and atrisk youth opens its doors — to the public. Spectrum O n e Stop, 177 Pearl St., Burlington, 3:30-6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 864-7423. HOLIDAY PARTY: Win a weekend getaway at the Inn at Essex at a seasonal shindig hosted by the Essex Business and Professional Association. New England Culinary provides the hors d'oeuvres. Inn at Essex, 6-9 p.m. $12. Reservations, 878-9305.

©Wednesday dance C O N T A C T IMPROV: See December 6. SCOTTISH COUNTRY DANCING: See December 12, Christ Church, Montpelier, 7:30 p.m. Donations. Register, 229-9811.

kids STORY T I M E : Babies and toddlers up to two-and-a-half hear tales. Fletcher Library, Burlington, 10:30-10:55 or 11-11:25 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216.

EARLY DEADLINE Listings for events from December 2 0 through January 10 are due in writing by December 15. Send to: S E V E N D A Y S , P.O. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402-1164. Or fax 802-865-1015. sevenday@togefher.net

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SCOTTISH COUNTRY DANCING: Dancers of all ages learn Scottish steps at the Champlain Senior Center, Burlington, 8 p.m. $1.50. Info, 862-3638.

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MESSIAH S I N G - A L O N G : The Burlington Oratorio Society sets the tempo. Bring your own music to the Cathedral of St. Paul, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. $5. Info, 658-3356.

A U D I T I O N : See December

'REINDEER RAMBLE': You don't have to be fleet of foot to win a prize — in the costume category. Runners of all abilities compete by team and age in this five-kilometer road race. Hiawatha School, Essex Junction, 1 p.m. $ 12. Info, 879-1376.

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O P E N REHEARSAL: Women bring their vocal chords to a harmonious rehearsal of the Champlain Echoes. Knights of Columbus Hall, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 864-6703.

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Open Daily Holiday Hours

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Bach's Mass IN B M I N O R - performed by the Vermont Mozart Festival Orchestra and the Oriana Singers, I i & William Metcalfe, conductor

Friday, D e c e m b e r 1 5 * 8 •if

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Pre-concert talk starts at 7 p.m. First Congregational Church, Burlington

For Tickets & Information, contact the Vermont Mozart Festival at (802) 862-7352.

Unique gifts 82. crafts Hot lunch 8l desserts Family entertainment

Co-sponsored by: Vermont Public Radio

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Saturday, December 9 10 am - 3 pm

Annual Open House WORKSHOPS • EXHIBITION AND SALES R E G I S T R A T I O N FOR W I N T E R C L A S S E S

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MESSAGE I N A BOTTLE Continued on page 13 the house to take ballet lessons. After three years of secrecy, the jig was up. "My father was sure I was gay," says Preston, who decided against a dance career because he was convinced he'd be a heterosexual outcast in the field. He never shook the dance bug, though. Most weekend nights, he drives into Burlington and boogies "with younger women" at Sh-Na-Na's. O f the six ships he's currently working on, Preston is most attached to his model of the Amistad, an 1839 Spanish

RALPH PRESTON IS ONE OF THOSE MYSTERIOUSLY MOTIVATED CREATIVE SOULS W H O FINDS SOLACE I N THAT MOST ANAL OF ARTISTIC PURSUITS: BUILDING SHIPS IN BOTTLES. slave ship famous for being successfully overthrown by its captives. It should take about five years to complete — a year shy of his average project length. Like all his constructions, this one will be given to friends or sold. Prices start at $2500 for his smallest ships. He is unwilling to talk price on larger models — his specialty is a 20-incher — but does say he's negotiating with a European museum willing to pay "record price" for a recently completed whaler. It's obvious bottleship builders aren't in it for the money. It's a labor of love — luckily, considering what one wrong move can mean. For Preston, that move happened five years ago. A few weeks before completing a model, he broke a mast. "I Said, gosh darn,' Preston says, adding, "I hope you don't believe that for a second." Removing, repairing and replacing the busted piece took 11 months. All the sweat and eye strain is worth it for Preston. But he's "a little worried" that future generations of artisans won't share his enthusiasm. So he speaks to school groups and is working to establish the first American bottleship museum to draw continuing interest in the craft. But his ultimate contribution to the tradition is his ships, and he knows it. As Ralph Preston puts it, "I want them to be around after I've gone to the great bottle in the sky." •

1 2 3 St. Paul St. (Across from City Hall Park) • 864-6142

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6,1995 -

GANG OF FIVE _ Chinatown meets Vermont Life in the latest — multi-cultural — mystery from Archer Mayor

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His last (Fruits of the Poisonous Tree) imagines the repercussions of a highly publicized rape in a tight-knit, semi-urban, politically overwrought town like Brattleboro. This adventure begins with a chance encounter on the Interstate: Gunther and a patrolman pull over a car whose three Asian occupants don't seem to know each other very well. The subjects' attitudes range from menace to nervous guilt, but the cops have nothing to go on but . the hackles rising on the backs of their necks. They let the trio go. It's another great Mayor opener, a threat so understated but undeniable that we're frightened from page two on. And we're not at all surprised to learn, much later in the book, that the hoodlums were on their way to a "hit" in Montreal. By then, Gunther is investigating an urban-style "home invasion" — an Asian underworld intimidation tactic that combines ransacking, rape and torture — that has struck a Chinese restaurant owner and his family. It seems a new Asian gang is moving in on the northern New England money laundering, alien smuggling and drug selling previously dominated by

Montreal Chinese. What's more, the contest seems to be a bloody grudge match, a war of revenge in which bystanders — victimized Chinese, Brattleboro's hopeless underclass, and anyone who gets in the way — are slaughtered without compunction. Like Italian society's cosa nostra, the "dark root" of the book's title is a euphemism for organized crime: in this case, the gangs that seem to permeate Chinese life, Hong Kong and Taiwan (and mainland China, by some reports), as well as the innumerable colonies of the "overseas Chinese," seem to be carrying this cultural burden into the 21st century. And now, Mayor explains, as gangs of all kinds move out to the country, and with Hong Kong facing takeover by the communist government, Chinese, "Vietchin" and other East Asian criminals are finding out how much money there is to be made in places like Vermont. Next thing you know, Gunther is chasing down killers from both gangs, and the body count — including cops — is rising so quickly that, if this were reality, the governor would probably declare martial law. For fans of the series, it is worth noting that The Dark Continued

SEVEN

on page

DAYS

Rhino Journals. Spiral bound for easy, lay-flat writing. Colorful and thought-provoking covers. Made from recycled paper - of course! Lined or Blank. $9.95.

M A Y O R A L R A C E S : Vermont's number one mystery writer unravels crime and culture o now I read in the papers where Rutland is having trouble with Latino street gangs. No offense to Vermont's most central big town, but I didn't know there were enough people in Rutland to sustain a gung-ho 4 H club, let alone minority gangs. And how do street gangs do business in a climate that makes toboggan runs out of thoroughfares for five months out of each year? Well, there's no accounting for the ingenuity of vice, which — like life itself — seems to find ways to thrive in the most marginal circumstances. And there's no doubting the criminological acuity of Vermont author Archer Mayor, whose latest novel, The Dark Root, featuring Brattleboro Police Lt. Joe Gunther, takes the idea of minority gangsters in snowwhite Vermont to thrilling extremes. Of course, Mayor has made a police-procedural career out of taking Green Mountain possibilities past the point of predictability. O f the five previous Joe Gunther mysteries, one (Borderlines) deals with murder in an Island Pond-like town that is headquarters to a controversial religious commune; another ( T h e Skeletons Knee) finds homicidal inspiration in Vermont's strong connections to the '60s radical counterculture.

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Root seems almost reactionary to its predecessor. T h e rape victim in Fruits of the Poisonous Tree was Gail Zigman, Gunther's long-time love, and that novel was at least as concerned with her emotional survival, Joe's reactions and the future of their relationship as with catching the rapist.

• T A

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Gunther — and Mayor —1 seem almost embarrassingly glad to have a straightforward chase in view. But those who missed the last book, or who choose The Dark Root as their first Joe Gunther novel, will only notice Mayor's masterly way with a plot, his immediate-

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All in all, it was an awful lot of introspection for an action-oriented series, though Gunther is a compelling narrator even when he's just watching his own emotions run amok.

ly convincing characters and vivid scenery. The Dark Root is a rousing addition to the kind of series people thank themselves for discovering. •

But The Dark Root gets Gunther's inner life out of the way right from the start. Though Joe and Gail have bought a house together, she has also started studying for a new career — as a lawyer — and is off at school for nearly the entire novel.

Archer Mayor will read from The Dark Root Saturday at 10 a.m. at the Vermont Book Shop in Middlebury.

The Dark

Reflection is simply not on The Dark Root's agenda. Colleagues die, get blown up and crack up, but Joe barely pauses to grieve or give aid. In the context of the series,

SEVEN DAYS

Root,

by Archer Mayor, Mysterious 368

pp.,

Press, $19.95.

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December 16 & 17 • 7:30 PM OLYMPIC CENTER

Saturday, December 9 at 8pm, The Flynn Theatre

— LAKE PLACID — PARKING LOTS OPEN AT 4:00 PM — ALL SEATS RESERVED TICKETS: CHARGE BY PHONE 518-523-3330 OR 802-86-FLYNN (863-5966) Olympic Center B 0 r Flynn T h e a t r e Regional B 0 , & U V M Campus Ticket Store ( B u r l i n g t o n , VT), Laser W o r l d (Essex, VT), S o u n d Source ( M i d d l e b u r y , VT), Peacock M u s i c , (Plattsburg, NY) For Directions & Info Call 5 1 8 - 5 2 3 - 3 3 3 0 or 8 0 0 - 4 4 7 - 5 2 2 4 ext. 122 PRESENTED BY GREAT NORTHEAST PRODUCTIONS, INC. page

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VSO HOLIDAY POPS AT THE FLYNN

SEVEN DAYS

Kate Tarnarkin conducts the full VSO and members of its Chorus in afestive

Holiday Pops concert, including music for the season by Leroy Anderson, Tchaikovsky and many others, along with traditional favorites and an audience sing-along!

Tickets start at just $7, and are available from the VSO TicketLine (864-5741) or from the Flyrm Theatre Box Office (86-FLYNN).

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CERAMIC ARTISTS SHOW & SALE , with Jane Kramer, Emily Rossheim and Sandra West. Jane Kramer Studio, Burlington, 658-1449. December 8, 4-7 p.m., December 9, 10-2 p.m. NAKED PAVEMENT, photographs by Spencer Tunick. Exquisite Corpse Artsite, Jager DiPaola Kemp Design, Burlington, 864-5884. Reception December 9, 6:30-9:30 p.m. NEW PAINTINGS , by Laura Emerson. Daily Planet, Burlington, 862-9647. Reception December 10, 4-6 p.m.

ongoing

IN THE STREETS, photographs from the Peoples Conference for Economic 1 Metropolitan Gallery, City Hall, Burlington, 863-6248. HANDWORKS/HAND WORKS , mixed media works by Els* Waller. McAuley Arts Center, Trinity College, Burlington, 658-0337. Through February 29. INK DRAWINGS, by Gregg Blaisdei. And DECORATIVE FRAMES with / antique jewelry and buttons, by Elaine Ducharme. Daily Planet, Burlington, 862-9647. A COLLECTION OF ALUMNI ART WORKS of eight graduates. Burlingtonj College, Burlington, 862-9616. Through January 1$. ANNUAL HOLIDAY SHOW, with 11 regional artists. Furchgott Sourdiffe Gallery, Shelburne, 985-3848. Through January 18. EXPERIMENTS I N SHAPE AND L I N E , oil paintings by Nikki Hill. McCarthy Arts Center, St. Michael's College, Colchester, 654-2000. IU Y i ^ W h e n Through December 8. Christine Cason isnt teaching PAINTINGS & SCULPTURE, group show with seven local artists. Wing art history, shes making it. Her Building, Burlington, 864-7480 Through January 31. suture fashions all-natural SEEING. FEELING, HEARING, a collaborative exhibition with painter Sean ^se27ndbotT'

C ^ Bill Heisse Metalworks % Class Blowing Demonstration & Open House Studio Sale SaUinl.n & Sunda) • December') Ac 10 . and 16 & 17.10am - 5 pm 225 Cluirch S(ree( oil (lie corner of Maple S(ree(. I'tirlin^lon I or inioinaUon call 863-:i«80

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Quality Artist Materials at Discounted Prices Located next to Vermont Studio Center, Pearl Street, Johnson 802-635-2203, 800-887-2203 OPEN: Wed. thru Sat 10 am - 6 pm. CLOSED: Dec. 25 - Jan. 2.

F L O W E R S

fo* a// seasons SCULPTURE, by Christine Cason, Red Mill Gallery, Johnson Studio Center, 635-2727. Through December 15. PORCELAIN SCULPTURES by Ann Young. Vermont Clay Studio Gallery, Montpelier, 223-4220. Through December. 1 5 t h ANNUAL FESTIVAL OF THE CHRISTMAS TREES, evergreens decorated by Vermont artists. And COMMUNITY ART SHOW, work by local artists. Helen Day Art Center, Stowe, 253-8358. Through December 31. . SPICE OF L I F E , group exhibition of nine Vermont artists. Firehouse Gallery, Burlington, 860-1792. Through January 13. > FIVE ARTISTS FROM GRACE, featuring Gayleen Aiken, Merrill Densmore, Larry Bissonette, Dot Kibbee and Phyllis Putvain. Artspace, Burlington, 862-2898. Through January 10. ARTISTS OF COLOR H. Lawrence McCrory Gallery of Multicultural Art, Bailey/Howe Library, University of Vermont, Burlington, 656-2023. Ongoing exhibit. SEASON ' S FLEETINGS, hand-pulled relief prints and monoprints showing seasonal changes in Vermont, by Roy Newton. Red Onion, Burlington, 865-2563- Through December. OPEN STUDIO, a small group of Burlington artists show their stuff. Wing Building, Burlington, 865-4435Every Saturday through December 15BEGINNING AGAIN, monotypes by Terry Racich. Unitarian Universalist Church, Burlington, 658-3564. Through December. THE STORY OF A RELATIONSHIP, narrative paintings by Dug Nap, Studio, Burlington, 658-5123. Call for appointment. WATER ON WATER, recent watercolors from the waterfront by Benjamin Stein. Wing Building, Burlington, 863-4105. Through January 10. AUTOBIOGRAPHY THROUGH THE SELF-PORTRAIT, student works. McAuley Dining Room, Trinity College, Burlington, 658-0337. Through December 8. BEHIND THE SECRET WINDOW, paintings by Nelly Toll during the Holocaust. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 863-3403. Through December 10. NEW PAINTINGS, by Janet Fredericks. Merrill Lynch, Courthouse Plaza, Burlington, 660-1000. Through December. RELIEF WORKS, wood blocks and prints by Bonnie Baxter. McAuley Fine Arts Center, Trinity College, Burlington, 658-0337. Through January 5. GILA MONSTER ART COLLECTIVE, oil paintings and photographs by six local artists. Java Love, Burlington, 864-3414. Through January 1. COLLECTIVE HISTORIES, Installations by Suzanne Bocanegra and Michael Oatman focusing on collecting and eugenics. Also MARK WASKOW'S COLLECTION, 19thand 20th-century objects from the eccentric collections of Vermonter Mark Waskow. Fleming Museum, University of Vermont, Burlington, 656-0750. Through December 15. POP-UP BOOKS FROM AROUND THE WORLD, for children and adults. Fleming Museum, University of Vermont, Burlington, 656-0750. December 7-March 31. PICASSO: MULTIPLE-STATE PRINTS, exhibition of lithographs by Pablo Picasso from the Ludwig Collection. Fleming Museum, University of Vermont, Burlington, 656-0750. Through December 10.

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TOUGH ROW T

here are so many overqualified theater people in Vermont, it's scary. Drama school grads and conservatorytrained actors are adjusting lights and sweeping stages all over the state. So where does Burlington's Michael Jordan Evans get off? Here's a guy with a social services background producing and directing his fifth production, and doing a pretty decent job of it. And it's David Mamet, for crying out loud. This month, Evan's Ratchet Theatre takes on Speedthe-Plow, Mamet's harsh, comic tale of high-powered Hollywood deal-makers. The results, while uneven, are worth seeing. One of Mamet's finest, Speed-the-Plow tackles his laundry list of beefs with the human condition — alienation, isolation and the struggle to find meaning in a society which values individual success over intimate connection. With brilliant language and sly humor, the play covers a day in the life of three film industry players and the Big Project that will make

or break their careers. This production's successes are due in large measure to actor A1 Salzman. As ruthless studio executive Bobby Gould, Salzman anchors the cast with his poised pacing, crisp delivery and insightful interpretation. Salzman's is the kind of performance that makes audiences relax, knowing we'll see the playwright's work instead of the actor. Salzman is nicely matched by Dennis McSorley as the

Speed-the-Plow, w r i t t e n by David Mamet, d i r e c t e d by Michael Jordan Evans. 135 P e a r l , December 6 - 7 , 8 p.m. December 8 9, 7 p.m. $6-15. ingratiating Charlie Fox. This pair's scenes together are the show's strongest — displaying director Evans' most attentive work. The duo makes the tough delivery of Mamet's requisite

overlapping, rapid-fire dialogue look easy. Their comic timing is right on. We're transported by the linguistic rhythms and stunningly juxtaposed sounds.

But Evans

PLAYERS GAME: Dennis McSorley, Al Salzman and Rachel Beddoe in Speed-the-Plow

drops the ball by letting McSorley shuffle his way through the evening. Rather than simmer internally and finally explode, McSorley's emotions dissipate through excessive movement. His vocal abilities and detail work generally outweigh this problem, but one can imagine the additional power he could harness by simply standing still and declaring his presence. Interpreting David Mamet's scripts can be a dream gig or a nightmare job. Unless a director and actor understand that — as Mamet told The New York Times— "words were invented to hide feelings," characters become flat, dialogue stiffens

and drags. Such is the case with novice performer Rachael Beddoe's one-dimensional interpretation of Karen — the seemingly naive secretary with a hidden ambition. It's clear Beddoe is capable of more, but doesn't yet have the experience to deliver it. Unfortunately, director Evans doesn't yet have the eye to detect the problem and help Beddoe learn who her character is. Without full exploitation of Karen's character, the plot can't work. Unless we suspect that she is as fearlessly self-serving as her male counterparts, the cast's ensuing actions make no sense.

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By act three, the problem takes its toll on the entire production, and is clearly too much for Evans to fix. His formerly punchy directing is largely absent. They players become less precise, and important turning points pass unnoticed. And ultimately, the play's theme of contemporary alienation is watered down. Still, Speed-the-Plow is an evening well spent. This isn't a professional company, but it's a far cry from good-try, hi-mom theater. It's a place for legitimate talents to develop — on and behind the stage — alongside their more polished peers. •

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ARIES (Mar. 21-Apr. 19): I hope you heeded my alarm last week. I hope that by now you re headed out towards the frontier even if that means you had to sell your C D collection to buy a ticket for the Greyhound and are reading this horoscope at 3 a.m. because the empty soda pop cans that continually roll back and forth across the floor of the bus are keeping you awake. Not that the road to adventure is necessarily a literal highway. It could simply be the few steps you walk to the phone in order to get in touch with the scary but riveting resource that'll drag you kicking and cheering into the future. TAURUS (Apr. 20-May 20): -Tis the season for protests, rebellions and dissidence of all flavors. This is one time when you don't have to just sit there politely with a grimacing smile as someone tries to swallow your soul. Complain. Talk back. Raise a stink. Nicety if possible, but hey — whatever works. By the way, I suggest that in addition to your personal uprising, you bitch righteously about a political cause you're passionate about. If you're in the market for one, try this: the obscene series of nuclear blasts France is detonating in the South Pacific. Boycott French products! 6 € MINI (May 21-June 20): Knowing how much passion the gods are churning up in your vicinity these days, I tried to get North America's sexiest psychic, the Weekly World News Serena Sabak, to be guest author for your horoscope. But she was too busy ministering to her fabulously rich and famous clientele, so I had to fall back on the runner-up to North Americas sexiest psychic — yours truly. I'm sorry you have to settle for second-best. I assure you that in all other matters involving romance and eros, you will have your first pick. CANCER (June 21-July 22): A Cancerian man from Utah recendy discovered that his wife, to whom he'd been married for over three years, was actually a man. In a similar vein, a Cancerian rock star I know suddenly realized he was not the most original musician in the history of the world. To top it off, a Cancerian astrologer who prides himself on not lusting for fame — yours truly —- embarrassed himself by indulging in a lengthy daydream about yakking with Letterman on national TV. From these data, I have to conclude that we crabs are losing our illusions — especially about ourselvps — at a rapid, almost shocking rate. L€0 (July 23-Aug. 22): Though I haven't officiated at a wedding for five years, I still have my own tax-exempt parish within the Universal Life Church. And I'm coming out of retirement this week to offer you my services for a unique ceremony. I'm moved to make this special dispensation because I sense that you're now at the height of your feelings of love and admiration for your own gorgeous self. To mark this hallowed occasion, I propose that you allow me to perform a kamikaze rite that sanctifies your marriage to yourself. Ready? I now pronounce you your own husband and wife. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Forrest Fickling is an astrologer who specializes in statistical analysis. In a study of 50,000 people, he concluded that of all the signs, Virgos tell the fewest lies, Virgos are the most dependable, and Virgo women work the hardest, with Virgo men not far behind. I'm telling you all this because these three qualities are what the folks around you need most from you now — and what you need them to need you for. Be their rock, their anchor. ^ LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): This past summer a wild bright new part of you awakened and bloomed. But now, as autumn climaxes, that wild brightness is dimming, its expansive spirit contracting. You have every right to mourn. The ebbing energy of your beautifxil change is truly a sad occasion. .On the other hand, you should know that this little death is simply your way of embodying the natural rhythms of the earth, whose flora and fauna are receding into quiescence as the ssun retreats. And .as ^ sure as the cherry trees will blossom again next spring, so too will that bright part of you —• even bigger and better. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): What were you doing last June 10-14? A Scorpio baseball player named Mike Benjamin was on the hottest hitting streak in the history of the game. Seven other Scorpios I know were making stunning breakthroughs in their work or outstripping all their previous accomplishments. I'm calling your attention to this not just because it's been exactly six months since then, but because it's a perfect time to cash in on the quantum leap you made at that time. I'll let you decide whether that means lobbying for a raise, taking your work to a higher authority or trading the credit you earned back then for a new and richer niche. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Janet V. Limes, a Sagittarius from Seattle, is this week's guest author, offering her rant on "How to Be a Sagittarius": "I walk the highwire without a net across active volcanoes blindfolded, spinning stacks of plates, holding a burning torch in my teeth. 1 want everyone to love and adore me as much as I do myself, so then I can stop hating myself for not being all things to all people. I'm fiercely allergic to fraud and injustice, and 111 rip the mask off even the most pathetic impostor with relish. I give all my best things away and expect this and more from people I love. 1 know precisely how to hurt anyone, especially myself. Believe in me and I'll sell my soul for you." CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): The new drug craze in India is snake venom. To get high, junkies induce a snake to bite them on the tongue. The rush is kinda nasty, even if it is a vacation from the humdrum of normal waking consciousness. 1 bring this up because I have a hunch you've toyed with the fantasy (at least subconsciously) of jolting yourself out of your current funk with some equally noxious thrill. Can I talk you out of it? I respect your need to substitute any feeling for the heavy moods you're nursing, but there are safer and more effective ways to do it than through arguments* accidents and apoplectic reactions. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): The German government funded a lengthy scientific study on dowsing for underground sources of water in dry regions. At the end of 10 years, the head researcher at the University of Munich said, "It definitely works, but we have no idea how or why." His statement would apply equally well to the mojo you're using to tap into previously hidden veins of clout. 1 don't know why or how you're drumming up better connections and more inside dope, but you are. Could it be dumb luck and supernatural assistance? Or is it simply your just reward for ail the dogged bridgebuilding you've done this year? PISCES (Feb. 19-Mar. 20): The time: June 1944. The scenario: the imminent Allied invasion of German-occupied France. General Eisenhower is about to launch 150,000 troops towards Normandy. As a trick, he also stations a phantom army in England just across the channel from Pas de Calais, France. This fools the Germans into believing the attack will come there: As a result, they decide against sending reserve panzer divisions to Normandy. The absence of this firepower proves an enormous advantage for the Allies, and they win the battle. Recommendation: All Pisceans study this tactic and incorporate it into their struggle this week. • © Copyright 1995

02/865- H E R B

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100 Main Street, Burlington, VT

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decernber

6,1995 -

Review

FILM FEATURES Time for one of the most popular versions of our quiz - in which we test your powers of reconstructive thinking with an assortment of famous features, for which we need the owners' famous names...

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FATHER OF THE B R I D E 11 Desperately in need of a hit, Steve Martin goes home again for the holidays. To the Banks home, that is. This time around, both daughter and wife (Diane Keaton) are expecting — and Dad's having a mid-life crisis, Desperately in need of a hit, Martin Short reprises his role as the accent-challenged decorator, Franck. •THE CROSSING GUARD You heard it here first: Don't be surprised to see Jack Nicholson snag another one come Oscar time for his performance in director Sean Penn's latest effort, the high-intensity story of a man whose child was killed by a drunk driver and who pays the guy a visit when he gets released from prison. With Angelica Huston. SABRINA You heard it here first: Don't be surprised to see this remake of the 1954 Audrey Hepburn romance sink fast, d la Warren Beattys Love Affair. Only this time its Harrison Ford who'll have a stunned look on his face. Sydney Pollack directs.

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december

6,1995

North A\r enue, Burlington, 863-6040. Never Talk to Strangers 3:15, 7:05, 9:25. Scarlet Letter 11:55, 2:25, 6:30, 9. American Quilt 12:10, 2:35, 6:40. 9:10 Clueless 12:20, 6:50. Babe 11:45. 1:30. Devil in a Blue Dress 2:45, 9:20. Evening times Mon-Fri; all times Sat, Sun.

CINEMA

NINE

Shelburne Road, S. Burlington, 864-5610. Father of the Bride* II 10, 12:10, 2:20, 4:30, 7:05, 9:50. White Man's Burden 2:05, 4:10, 6:50. 9:55. Toy Story 10:05, 12, 2:10, 4:20, 6:30, 8:40, 10:35. Casino 12:15, 3:40, 7:15. Nick of Time 10:10, 12:15. Money Train 10:30, 1,4, 6:40. 9:25. Goldeneye 10:15, 12:30, 3:35, 6:35, 9:35. Ace Ventura 2 10:20, 12:15, 2:30, 4:25, 7, 9:45. American President 10:20, 12:35, 3:40, 6:40, 9:30. It Takes Two 10:25, 1. Copycat 3:30, 6:30, 9:30. Evening times Mon-Fri; all times Sat, Sun.

SEVEN

DAYS

SHOWCASE CINEMAS 5 Williston Road, S. Burlington, 863-4494. Father of the Bride 2* 12:30, 2:30, 4:50, 7:15, 9:40. Toy Story 12, 2:10, 4:20, 6:30, 8:40, 10:30. Money Train 4:45, 7:25, 9:40. Goldeneye 1:10, 4:10, 7, 9:55. Ace Ventura 2 12:15, 2:35,' 5, 7:20, 9:45. It Takes Two 12:25, 2:45. NICKELODEON CINEMAS College Street, Burlington, 863-9515. Sabrina* 6:40 (Sneak Sat). Crossing Guard* 1:30, 4:20, 7:10, 9:40. H o m e for the Holidays 12, 2:20, 4:40, 6:40 (not Sat), 9:10. Get Shorty 12:20, 2:40,. 5, 7:20, 9:50. American President 11:50, 2:10, 4:30, 6:50, 9:20. Carrington 1, 3:30, 6:30. Casino 12:30, 4, 7:30. Seven 9. THE SAVOY Main Street, Montpelier, 229-0509. Mighty Aphrodite 2 (Sat & Sun), 6:30, 8:30 * STARTS FRIDAY. Times subject to Please call theaters to confirm.

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W I N T E R FUN PLAYMATE W A N T E D : Tall, 47-59, nonsmoker. Let's explore snow, slopes, skiing & snowshoeing, followed by hot drinks & a warm, toasty fireplace. Downhill/cross-country, your choice! Box P-15. MY C H R I S T M A S W I S H : To find a huggable teddy that isn't bashful for this wanting 45 YQ N S / D N lady. Under my tree or yours. Also for LTR. Box P-21. L O N G B L O N D E HAIR, green-eyed college student, looking for educated M who is outgoing, emotionally secure and a non-womanizer. Ages 18-24. Box P-22.

men seeking women

W S M 30-YEAR-OLD W I D O W E R , have good job, good-looking, respectful, likes movies, bicycling, going out to eat. Seeking good-looking woman around same age, respectable, nice, downto-earth-individual interested in dating and friendship. Box P-6. ALL YOU N E E D IS LOVE, D W M . I'm 44, 5'8", 145 lbs., open-minded, attractive. Fond of music, walking, talking, hiking, movies, sports, sunsets and possibly you. Box P-l3. T R U S T F U N D H O M E S T E A D E R , 40, heroic • hipster/dufus, lover of books, bad weather, adventure, romance...ha-cha-cha-cha! Box P-l6.

LONELY 2 N D S H I F T W O R K E R : SWM, 56, 5'11", 178 lbs. seeking LTR with S/D W F 40 to 55, full -figured 5'2" to 5'8," smoker and kids okay. I will pay your rent in Burlington area. Waiting for a letter. I like TV, country music, walks, holding hands and more. Box P-24.

I SPY W I T H MY LITTLE EYE a M who's sexy, sweet, caring, hairless, a morning person, huggable, has a fetish for cows and is keepable. Box P - l 4 . MARTIN'S, Dorset Street, Sunday 11/5, around 3. You had Tostitos, a baseball cap, a lovely smile. Ran out of aisles. Want to meet somewhere else? Box P-l7.

men seeking men

ARE YOU: Attractive, slender, healthy and fit? Do you run, bike, hike and love winter? Me, too. 30s to 40s female. Please write and I'll call. Box P-l 8.

E D U C A T E D MAN D W M 35, very attractive, educated, professional, published writer, poet, linguist. Humorous, sincere, sensitive, athletic, good conversationalist, romantic. ISO pretty,

FREE-FALLING T H R O U G H T I M E : Tall, built renegade seeks trim, foxy lady 40+ to fire retrorockets with, smell the roses and capture our wildest dreams together. R.S.V.P Box P-23.

F R I E N D IN DEED! Handsome, spirited, spiritual G M (37) seeks a comrade for intimacy. Also an "angel" who can assist me to access alternative medicines for living with HIV. Box P12.

Abbreviations: A-Asian; B-Black; Bi-Bisexual; D-Divorced; F-Female; G-Gay; H-Hispanic; ISO-ln Search Of J-Jewish; L-Latino; LTR-Long-term relationship; M-Male; NA-No alcohol; NS/ND - No smoking, No drugs; S-Single; W-White.

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HOME ALONE FOR THE HOLIDAYS? Find someone to trim your tree with a personal ad in Seven Days

PERSON to PERSON Circle Category: WOMEN SEEKING MEN MEN SEEKING WOMEN MEN SEEKING MEN WOMEN SEEKING WOMEN WRITE ON

I SPY

THE AD (First 25 Words Are FREE).

B I L L I N G I N F O R M A T I O N (If ad exceeds 25 words) Additional Words x $1.25 x 3 weeks =

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M A I L AD TO : Seven Days, RO. Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402 OR FAX TO (802) 865-1015.

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page

SEVEN

DAYS

decernber

6,1995

Classifieds help wanted HELP! Looking for someone ro run my business. N o experience needed, just a positive attitude. Unlimited income potential. 660-2544, ext. 15. COLOR ME GREEN Environmental co. expanding in Burlington area, seeks leaders who care. FT/PT, will train. High income potential. 660-2544. N E W H O L I S T I C MAGAZINE SEEKING INVESTOR or partner. $ is important, so is magazine knowledge. Both together is a definite +. 865-9263 or 865-5185. C H R I S T M A S CASH! Need extra cash for the holiday and beyond? International marketing firm seeks motivated individuals with leadership qualities to help us grow. 862-6656. YOUTH MENTORS NEEDED Mentors needed to provide live-in care for adolescent male with special needs in your home or be willing to find a home/apartment to share with rhis youth. Mentors will be expected to provide a structured and safe home environment and assist individual in acquiring independent living skills. Single, mature individuals with experience working with children and young adults with developmental

disabilities and/or emotional/ behavioral problems encouraged to apply. Training, support, respite and generous stipend provided. Send letter of interest and resume to: NFI, Attn: Carrie 112 Lake St. Burlington, V T 05401 or call for more information at 660-4822.

furnished apt. B U R L I N G T O N 1 BEDR O O M apartment. Lower Maple Street, offstreet parking, Heat & Utilities included. $500/month. 860-6126,

stuff to buy B R E W Y O U R O W N BEER! Homemade wine and soft drinks, too. With equipment, recipes, and friendly advice from Vermont Homebrew Supply. Now at our new location next to the Beverage Warehouse, E. Allen Street, Winooski. 655-2070. W O M E N ' S TELEMARK/ B A C K C O U N T R Y SKI B O O T S : Merrill Ultms. Size 7. All-leather, Vibram soles, great condition. $100. Call 4345546. PEAVY DYNA BASS 4 string, ebony neck through body. Pearl inlay active electronics, sunburst finish. Xlnt cond., $500. Also,

1-15" Bass cab. Made by Mike Gordon — make offer. 865-2528. G I B S O N ES-135: Just starting to break in. Asking $800. Call 863-0247. A U D I O : KEYBOARD-EPS 16+ turbo, sampling sequencer w/ 2meg RAM/SCSI interface, 1000's of sounds, $1000. Roland SBX80 S M P T E / M I D I synch box, $375. Shure M67M I C mixer 4X mono, $150. Phantom Power supply 48 volt, 4 channel, $75. Will consider trade for desktop stuff. Bill Kinzie, 658-1531. VIDEO: PANASONIC W ] M X 12 video/audio mixer, mint, $1,000. Sony V 0 9 8 0 0 - 3 / 4 SP, excellent condition, $3750. T B C - I D E N - I T V 7, mint, $850. Tamron Fotovix-film to video transfer unit, $350. Bill Kinzie, 658-1531.

housemates B U R L I N G T O N : Roomy house on river in New North End. W / D , large yard. Pets okay. On bike path. $400 + 1/2 util. Larry, 860-6898. A N O T H E R W O M A N wanted to join one man, one woman in cooperative household. Beautiful, sunny, organized 3bedroom apartment with garden space, parking and W / D . N/S, drug-free. Vegetarian preferred. $225+, 862-6727.

real estate C O H O U S I N G IS S H A R I N G RESOURCES A N D CREATI N G C O M M U N I T Y . It is happening in the Burlington area. Interested? Call Barbara or Don, 862-1289 days; 658-4857

Lee Gillies at 658-2861. Call BIG T O E P R O D U C T I O N S for quality, affordable, 24 ch. live sound, DJ services, and bookings. Contact: Rachel "Tex" Bischoff or Jenn Nawada at: 658-8772.

weight loss

T H E G R E E N ST. M U S I C S C H O O L for lessons in guitar, bass, drum kit, snare rudiments, African percussion, banjo and voice. Many different styles and levels taught. 865-2528.

LOSE 5 - 1 0 - 2 0 + LBS before the holidays. Doctor tested. All natural. Money back guarantee. 802-583-1521 or 1-800-311-5984.

BASS LESSONS: Berklee grad accepting students. All abilities, acoustic or electric. John Lilja (Science Fixion, Jenni Johnson, etc.) 655-3259.

music REHEARSAL SPACE coming soon. Burlington/S. Burlington location, living-room-like atmosphere. Rent by hour/ week/month. For more info., call Lee at 860-8440. Leave message. D R U M LESSONS: learn from 25 yrs. experience: N-Zones, XRays, H o o D o o Revue etc. Call Bruce McKenzie, 658-5924. " M I L D T O W I L D " DJ SERVICE! 500 C D s — ALL STYLES T O A D D P I Z Z A Z Z T O YOUR HOLIDAY PARTY! 2 HRS./$150, 3 HRS/$200, 4 HRS/$225. W O W ! 660-1982. S A X O P H O N E LESSONS: All levels, all ages, all styles. Call

session, $60. Tranquil Connection, 878-9708.

business for sale HAIR SALON — Moving. Must sell. Small full-service Burlington salon, 7 years in business, turn-key operation, low rent & util. Call 655-3983

martial arts MARTIAL ARTS FOR W O M E N : Self defense and fitness training for women only. Group and private lessons. 879-2554.

KEYBOARD LESSONS: R&B - funk. Studio musician/ seasoned pro. Brian Bull (Tough Judges) Affordable. Call 6581531 or 865-3930.

room for rent BURLINGTON, C O L C H E S T E R AVE. Looking for a 5th roommate for a big, spaciousbedroom. Plenty of parking, walking distance to U V M and downtown; $250+ util. 433-6263.

massage U N D E R STRESS? For ultimate relief, hot-tub, shower, massage or a gift for that special someone. For healing/energy. Regular session, $45; extended

freebies FREE T O A G O O D H O M E ONLY: Female German Shepherd mix. 660-4729.

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|Did you move to Vermont since 1 9 8 0 ? Did you bring a car with ou? G e t y o u r sales tax b a c k !

all Taxback at (802)864-2821

g for a non-psychotic housemate?

5 lines. 5 words per line. 5 dollars. Yahoo

& exp. date or a check to Seven Days, attn: Classifieds, 05402 , call 802.864.5684 with VISA/MC, or stop by treet, Miller's Landmark, Burlington. S E V E N DAYS

DOUBLE FEATURE Continued

from

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side to his movies." In the '30s, Keaton's work deteriorated due to his loss of control over production and direction, the advent of sound, and personal troubles. By the time he died in 1966, he had been reduced to playing bit parts in B movies. Frisell had not been interested in silents — or — Keaton — before ™ 1993, when Arts at St. Ann's in Brooklyn commissioned him to compose and perform music for the three films featured on the current tour. "As I got into it, I really fell in love with Buster Keaton," he said. "I've started to feel close to him in a lot of ways. I almost feel like I know him." Frisell noted similarities between the "depth" in Keaton's work and his own.

the films is now available on two Nonesuch recordings, released to high acclaim earlier this year under the appropriate title, Music for the Films of Buster Keaton. Compositions for the two short comedies, The High Sign and One Week, comprise

disc, while the music for Go West is on a second release. To Frisell's credit, the recordings depart from the lesser traditions of silent movie soundtracks. No ragtime cliches or gratuitous sound

effects here. Rather, the music is more subtle, moody and emotional. Tightly composed playing and adventurous improvisation characterize his tunes, as do the same bittersweet humor and joy in the unpredictable that are so much a part of Keaton's work. The High Sign and One Week were originally released in 1920. The former tells the story of a hapless protagonist who rescues a miserly character from robbers — replete with slapstick gag sequences and physical comedy. One Week finds Keaton — the "Great Stone Face" — resolutely building his honeymoon cottage according to the flawed plans in a how-to manual. The result is a structure of impossible architectural dimensions and highly comic proportions. .. "The first few times we did it," Frisell observed of his collaboration with Keaton-on-celluloid, "there was a lot of panic just to make sure that we got through it and got all of our

The music composed for

Bill Frisell/ Buster Keaton, Flynn Theatre, Burlington December 8 8

p.m.

$19.50/16.50/12.

cues right. As we've done it more, it really starts to feel like the lines between the music and film get more and more blurred. It's an incredible feeling when the energy of the film and the energy of the music become one thing." • In a pre-performance lecture on "The Genius of Buster Keaton, " Seven Days film critic Barry Snyder will discuss how Go West, The High Sign and One Week are representative of Keaton's work. At the Flynn Education Space, 147 Main St., Burlington, 6:30 p. m. Free and open to the public. Call 863-8778for more info.

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Did y o u m o v e to V e r m o n t since 1980? Did you bring a car with y o u ? Get your sales tax back!

Call Taxback at ( 8 0 2 ) 8 6 4 - 2 8 2 1

Not Everyone is Cheery and Bright• • • But your donation of a non-perishable food item, new unwrapped toy or gift of a piece of clothing can bring a smile to someone's face. Stop into the Bend?Jerry's scoop shop on 169 Cherry street anytime between now and December 17, with a donation of one of the items on our Wish List and receive our new 1996 calendar with a free cone coupon for every month of the year! Also, visit our Holiday Open House on Sunday, December 17 from 11:30 a.m8£>Op.m. for free cookies, hot mulled cider and entertainment. For a copy of The Wish List call862-9620and we would be happy to fax or send you a copy. Help us make the holiday season a little more cheery and bright for those less fortunate.

M P I P I I i l iilliipb

Almartin Volvo hosts Free Child Safety Seat Inspection at their Shelburne Road Showroom {Dec. 7 & 8 , 3 pm to 6 pm j Dec. 9 , 10 am-3 pm

GREG S

MEAT MARKET Give a gift everyone will enjoy ... a gift certificate from Greg's. * Any Denomination

THIS WEEK

•Inspections t a k e o n l y 1 0 minutes a n d a r e conducted b y representatives f r o m GovemoKsHigh way Safety Program a n d V e r m o n t S t a t e Police. •Everyone Welcome,regardless of t h e m a k e o f t h e car.

$1»29/<lozen Chicken Breasts

(Boneless/Skinless)

Whole Pork loin

$2.09/lb. $179/lb. $2»89/lb. $.79 ea. $2.99/R».

Call with questions.

3 E L M S T R E E T • MIDDLEBURY

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388-2162 OPEN 7 DAYS