Letter From the Chair

REFLECTIONS

By: Shawn Worsham, Worley

During the National and State ABC Conventions we have always been treated to excellent keynote speakers and presentations. The past National Convention in Grapevine, Texas was no different but one speaker, in my opinion stood out from the others. Kevin Brown spoke about heroes and how we define heroes. There are obvious heroes throughout the world in various capacities. It is easy to see heroes in our military, first responders, medical professionals and those that speak out for those who cannot. Some define a hero as “an ordinary person who does an extraordinary thing”. Kevin added to this “…and expects nothing in return”. During his speech he dropped a few nuggets that were worth remembering and spoke about heroes in his personal and professional life.

Kevin Brown first told us a very personal story about two of his heroes. He discussed why his son, Josh, and wife, Lisa, were two of his heroes. His son was born with Autism and he told the story of how the doctors, counselors, and education professionals first spoke to he and his wife about all the things that their son would never be able to do. They told them that Josh would be relegated to special education classes and most likely live a subsidized life. He said his wife was sad for about a minute and then got mad. She looked at the lead counselor for the school and said, “We are going to rewrite that script”. Think about how powerful of a statement that is to not accept what you are given but to instead seek a way to do better. We all can choose our path and should never allow others to write our script. Lisa began researching Autism and alternate teaching methods. She also focused on nutrition as it is common for Autistic children to lean towards certain foods. She was fortunate to meet educators along the way willing to spend the extra time it took for Josh to understand the subject matter. Never underestimate the love of a committed parent. Josh eventually graduated high school and attends college in Orlando because he loves Disney and wanted to be close to his “Aunt” Bea. Aunt Bea was not his real Aunt but instead a Disney Chef who he had befriended after an encounter when he was young. Bea went out of her way to prepare a meal that met his requirements and gained a lifelong friend by creating that “special moment in time”. That encounter led Bea to perform research and build a special dietary menu that was adopted by Disney. It shows that you never know the influence that an action can have in your personal or professional life. The story struck close to home as I have a child on the Autism spectrum. While he excelled at Academics and the Arts, his social skills and dietary habits were a challenge. Like Lisa, my wife devoted countless hours in helping our son learn to respond appropriately and understanding social cues. So, like Kevin, my wife is one of my heroes. Do you have everyday heroes? Thank them if you get the chance.

Moving to his professional life, he spoke of the various mentors who influenced his life. He was told by one to look in a mirror until he no longer saw himself but instead saw the reflections of the people who made him who he is. He saw his father and mother, his grandparents, coaches, teachers, and professional mentors and realized that each had an impact on shaping his path. It made me think about some of the mentors who helped me along the way and influenced who I have become. As you read, think about who you would see in the mirror.

I wish that I would have had more time with my paternal grandfather and father, but I think about the lessons of hard work that they instilled in me though they were very different individuals. My grandfather was a man of few words and was only educated through the fourth grade. He had apprenticed as a blacksmith and lost an eye when a mule kicked him. He eventually became an equipment operator and despite the lack of depth perception from only having one eye became a grader operator and did the finish grading for I-10 and other highways. I was the first-born grandchild and happened to be born on his 50th birthday. My parents promptly named me after him. He once taught me to hoe weeds in the garden using only seven words when I was very young. The first lesson was the 15 minutes it took to sharpen the hoe with a file. This was followed by a lesson on how to stop my fingers from bleeding.

When we got to the garden, he simply said “pay attention”, and with that he started skimming the surface of the ground with the hoe cutting any weeds and dropping them in the center of the row. When he got to a large clump of grass he said “watch”. He rammed the corner of the hoe under the grass and gave a quick upward thrust that unearthed the roots. He reached down and shook the excess dirt off the roots and threw the grass to the end of the row. When we reached the end of the row, he handed me the hoe and said, “do the next row”. Seven words was all it took. When we finished, he washed and dried the tools, rubbed them down with oil to prevent rust and then hung them in their dedicated space. Here ended the lesson. A two-word lesson was his record. My brother was appointed to a position in the local Masonic Lodge and was receiving some push back from older more experienced members. When he spoke to our grandfather he was simply told to “saw wood”. It took my brother a little while before he understood that he simply needed to do the work necessary and that other people’s opinions would either change or they would not. He progressed in the lodge and became a Shriner and Scottish Rite Mason. Eventually he received the highest award that could be granted for his years of service to the lodge and his community. Do you sometimes spend too much energy trying to satisfy the opinion of people who may have no influence on your success or happiness? My father moved in with a local family who owned a dairy when he was 12. The family had no children of their own and needed help milking the 50 cows each day. My Father worked for room and board for the family until he joined the Army at 17. Each morning he milked the cows before going to school and then again in the evening after his other chores. His work ethic was second to none and I never knew him to miss a day’s work, no matter his health. When he left the military, he worked with my grandfather on the portion of I-10 between the Sabine River and Welsh, LA. It was there that he met my mother which led to me and my six siblings. We never had much, but wherever we were we had each other. My father continued working until two weeks ahead of his death, when the effects of colon cancer made it impossible. One of my sisters-in-law asked why he waited so long to stop working? My response was that he enjoyed working and it would have been easier to have turned the tide than for him to change his approach to work. To this day, I smile when my boss says that I need to improve my work-life balance. I think to myself how much better my balance is compared to my father. I also tell my employees not to use my balance as an example, but I am thankful to my father for the lessons.

Hopefully I have made you think a little and would again ask you to think about who your heroes are and why? Are you living life by your script or by the opinions of others? Who is in your Reflection?

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