Meet the Counsellors

An integral part of our student support system.

Student support services at Aberdeen Hall have always been robust due to our low student to teacher ratio, our focus on holistic education and our attention to personalisation of learning. The counselling department is an integral part of our student support system. They are a small department but mighty in their knowledge base, their professionalism, and the unconditional positive regard that they offer to every student in the Aberdeen Hall community.

Kayla Kuyvenhoven joined us in November of 2021 and quickly established herself as an absolute champion of students and all of their endeavors. She supports our youngest students when they need a safe space to sit with big feelings, and she helps our middle school students navigate the tricky times of adolescence. And then she goes to help coach rugby or basketball, depending on the season!

Emma Hanley joined us this fall, and she too has quickly embraced, and been embraced by, our community. She works with our senior school students and the experiences and connections she brings from community counselling have already made an impact in helping our students seek support and move forward with hope and resiliency. Emma has a “we’ve got this” presence about her that she also brought to the volleyball court as she co-coached the junior girls this past season.

I have the pleasure of working closely with these two intelligent, compassionate women and most of our conversations revolve around talking about other people's hopes and needs, so it was a treat to sit down and talk with them about who they are. I’m pleased to share some of that here.

What led you to a career in counselling?

KK: I have always been driven by the power of connection, what we can learn from one another, and how that supports us in moving forward, stronger. Throughout my educational and professional experiences, I’ve worked in outpatient mental health, probation services, inpatient addictions treatment, and schools both locally and internationally and through these roles, I realized it’s young people that have consistently challenged me to be better and support harder. I am amazed by the resilience of students, the power of community, and the magnitude of what listening can accomplish.

EH: Due to life experiences, my interests and my schooling, I knew I wanted a career in a helping profession but was unsure which direction to go in. After finishing my undergraduate degree in Sociology my first job was as a Counsellor at an intimate partner violence shelter. I knew very quickly that Social Work and Counselling was what I wanted to do. I saw the importance of community, advocacy and empowerment within vulnerable populations, and I knew it was a career that would help foster my interest and passion for social justice.

What’s something you wish everyone knew about the world of mental health and counselling?

KK: My favourite term in the counselling profession is “unconditional positive regard” which is a pillar of my counselling philosophy. This means that I need to give full acceptance and support to the person sitting in front of me, regardless of what is going on for them. I truly believe that the counselling space is used as a safe place to make sense of all of our thoughts. Once we do this, we can make room for new thoughts that can drive further positive feelings and behaviours. A challenge I find that consistently pops up is how “scary” counselling can feel for people. It does take an immense amount of bravery to use your self-awareness and speak with someone about how you are feeling. Destigmatizing the school counselling process has become a large part of my role. I want people to know that school counsellors are people who can listen to what’s going on and provide support in how to move forward. It’s about problem solving, future thinking, and resilience. Sometimes, it’s just about knowing someone is in our corner and really hears us.

EH: I wish everyone, especially the students, knew that everyone is dealing with something. I see so much comparison between peers with students thinking that so-and-so has it all together and doesn’t have insecurities or worries or trauma when the reality is that everyone has had to, or will need to, address their mental health at some point in time. If we can increase a sense of empathy in our youth it will set them up to be more supportive and caring adults. Life is messy and it can be hard and reaching out for support is important and a sign of strength, not weakness.

What’s a challenge that you’re working on?

KK: I find it challenging when I see students’ stressors increase and then see their capacity for self-compassion plummet. Watching students lose their love for themselves is really hard to witness. However, knowing that I play a role in reminding them of their strengths, worth, and abilities keeps me going; and I can sit with them until they feel strong enough again.

EH: It can be challenging to juggle the variety of needs that come through the door in one day: ages and developmental stages, cultural backgrounds, family and personal values, presenting with different concerns and understanding how to support each individual. However, I have to admit this is also a positive: there is rarely a dull moment in my day and I’m the type of person who appreciates a challenge.

What keeps you going on a tough day?

KK: On a tough day, one of my favourite noises (even though I rarely admit it out loud) is the hustle and bustle that is the Middle School hallway. There’s laughter, jokes, squeaky boots, encouragement, and imagination. I feel lucky to hear that every single day!

EH: I love that everyday I get to work in a career that gives me a sense of purpose and allows me to help individuals recognize their own inherent dignity and worth. Being in a school makes me feel like I am part of a larger community and it has been so wonderful working with such a great team, in a very supportive environment.

What do you do to take care of yourself?

KK: Over time, I’ve learned that the more I make time for little joys and wins, the more that I feel content with myself and what I can handle. I'm happiest when I am outside in the mountains eating noodles with a view, playing bocce by the beach, spending quality time with my friends and family, and experimenting with new recipes (even if they don’t always turn out).

EH: I have only lived in BC for three years so I prioritize making time to connect with family back in Ontario, and getting outside, regardless of the weather, to hike and appreciate the natural beauty of this place we get to live in.

Not only are they incredibly skilled in their field but they’re also impressive role models for our students as they authentically live our school values

Article by Heather Nolan-Wood Director of Well-Being

JENNIFER GALLI