The Poisoning Thought by Adam King

The Poisoning Thought How to Locate the Survival Codes that Cause Our Relationships to Suffer By Adam King

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The Poisoning Thought How Our Survival Codes Cause Us Suffering I have had the same dream almost every night for the last two weeks, she leaves me. Over and over again, I upset her, we argue, and then she is gone. I exhaust this emotional experience in my mind, only to wake up with her lying peacefully next to me. Almost in tears, I am grateful to realize that it was just a dream. But, it continues to haunt me. It haunts me so much, that it brings poisoning thoughts into my physical, waking life. I wake up stressed, tired and confused. I know it's not real, but the possibility is, and that's what scares me. Our relationship is very strong, no cheating, little arguing and completely entwined spiritually. So, why these dreams then? Why is she always looking for someone else, searching for ways to leave me, cursing me, belittling me? This is not her character. It isn't long before she starts having the same dreams herself. Not of leaving me, but seeing me as angry, upset, or a threat to be dealt with. Then, she wakes up to see this is just a dream too. But is it? And, what is causing this mental torture? It is clear to me that there is something underlining our relationship that causes me to suffer, for her to suffer. Something, an idea, a fear, a jealousy of some sorts, a survival code. Wait a minute, is it a code? If so, what is it, and why can't I see it? Is it something I'm bringing into the dream? Or, is it the dream itself causing this suffering within my physical life? The next night before drifting off to sleep, I hold onto this thought. This one idea that there is a code hidden deep within me, that is causing both of us this suffering. But, I know better than to seek it directly. I know that if I seek this code straight forward, I will not find it. Simply because I will be looking through the very same perspective that is causing it. Instead, I must make a shift in my perspective in order to see through my eyes instead of from them. I fall asleep and once again, I allow the dream to haunt me.

I see her, she begins to act as if we were never even together. She is with another man, someone else in her life that takes precedence over me. I begin to feel the anger, the frustration and the fear. She notices me and angrily comes closer. It's as if her eyes are judging me, if I am a stranger that she is fighting to get away from.

"It begins to take the information and emotions before me, and dissect them with lightning speed."

"Its' not my fault she says, you forced me to do this because of all you've done to me." she says. I can feel my emotions begin to grow, defend, and retreat. But then, just as my emotions hit their greatest high, it's like a voice from the heavens reaches down and calls for me to listen. This voice, this thought, rings in my ears without taking sides. It is a clarity that has no definition, it just feels right as it begins its charge to cover the wrong. "Listen, it says. Pay attention. This is your chance to get clear." In that moment, my anger subsides as I open my heart to my wife in utter altruism. "Please, tell me why you're so angry, what have I done?" I ask her. I look into her eyes and there is no answer, only the resonance of anger and judgment. She looks back to me and shrugs, "you just don't get it do you?" I look back with even more empathy, "No, I don't get it, please help me to understand. I don't want to lose you." In that moment, this new perspective, this new voice, jumps out at me like a freight train. This voice, this perspective from the sky, from some other part of myself, reaching up, begins to direct my questions. It begins to take the information and emotions before me, and dissect them with lightning speed. These questions and the recognition of her own anger, immediately give me answers. I don't pay enough attention to you. I don't ask you how you are feeling often enough. I throw my stress onto you without regard to your emotions, your fear. I have been making it all about me without even noticing it. I have been making all the decisions, and never asking for help. ÂŠCopyright 2011 Adam King/Tesseramethod.com All Rights Reserved 4|Page

The list goes on. More details come to me, images, pictures of myself working too hard, not being there emotionally, and not catering to her needs. I can see specific examples of my ignorance towards her feelings. Moments in the past, events, being with friends, family, it's all right here now, so irrefutably clear and so directly in front of me. All this from one shift, from one adjustment of my awareness. And, within a simple dream. Wow... I look back upon her and ask her if this is what has caused her suffering and the actions leading to her infidelity and anger towards me. She looks at me with teary eyes, "Yes, I just want you to be happy so we can be happy", she says. In that moment, she tells me that the other man meant nothing to her, I believe her. She tells me that she only did it out of anger, uncertainty, and frustration towards the way I treat her. I get it, totally. I now realize that she, our relationship, and my deepest caring for her, is all that matters. I remove the anger of her infidelity, and the remorse towards myself for not understanding her motives. After all, the events that unfolded were my very own creation. They never really happened. They were there for one reason and one reason only. So I could project the abuse of my survival codes upon the walls of Tessera, and so that I could reflect back upon myself, and see the truth. In waking life, I would have had full right to end the relationship because of her infidelity. However, that wasn't the intention of this gift that I have been given. The intention was to locate the true source of my codes, my fear, shame and guilt, before any of this could have happened. And that, I have accomplished. I woke up the next morning to see her lying once again, beside me. Like an angel, beautiful, faithful and fully in love. I slid my arm under her head and pulled her close to me and could feel a tear of gratitude slip down my cheek. She woke to see my eyes filled with joy, love and clarity. "What is it?" she asks. "Nothing, I just love you, so, very much." She smiles. ÂŠCopyright 2011 Adam King/Tesseramethod.com All Rights Reserved 5|Page

As I embraced her, I have one last thought. It was me that ran this dark scenario within my mind so that I could see what I couldn't see. It was not her that was disloyal, angry or upset. It was my own experience being shown to me through the eyes of my true perspective, not from the eyes of my survival codes. And, in order to see the code itself, all I had to do was question all perspectives within my vision. To looked past myself, to see her side of the emotions that were presented to me, so that I, once and for all, could realize that this was nothing more than a projection of myself, for myself. This, is my greatest breakthrough. To realize that I now have a place to project that which is around me, through me, so that I can reflect back upon myself in order to see this truth. It is this process, that shows the collaboration of our outer and inner worlds and creates our reality. That our survival codes, albeit sometimes a heavy constraint, must have a place of origin. They can be found, and they can be defeated. They are the reflection of here and there. And, within this reflection, they are covered up by our very own perspective being blinded by natural selfishness. The need to see only our side of the story, and not theirs. This is our time to finally be able to see ourselves as a part of the whole, without the emotional constraint of self-ignorance, so that we too, can benefit others. And, by doing so, we benefit ourselves. So, next time you believe someone is angry with you, upset with you, or about to leave you, remember, it is most likely the origin of the belief itself, that can become the thought poisoning the choices that can unfortunately become our reality. The work within Tessera is powerful indeed. However, we must learn to project that which is dark within us, so that we too, some day, can see our own light. Warmly, Adam King

About the Author Adam King is a visionary, writer and composer. He is the creator of the Tessera Method, which is a one-of-a-kind program that utilizes a technology called Mental Auditory Simulation (MAS). The program allows the participant to create a personal, non-physical environment (Tessera), so that they can locate, and work on personal challenges and constraints. This is done through the projection of the parts of ourselves not normally seen in daily life, (Survival Codes). And, then reflecting upon those projections, so that positive transformation can take place. The true power of Tessera, is that it is built through the collaboration of personal working memory and imagination. In short, it helps shows the participants their emotional blocks and helps replace those blocks with stronger, emotional breakthroughs, through the use of music, atmospheric soundscapes, and verbal auditory guidance from Adam himself. Tessera has been called "A powerful screen-less motion picture of the self" and, "A positive world in which to locate, work on, and defeat our challenges".

The Benefits of Tessera Tessera has helped individuals, coaches and doctors realize and break through to the true source of such constraints as:          

Creative Blocks Poor, or Self Defeating Emotional Behaviors Divorce Negative Relationship Perspective Anxiety Issues Low Self Esteem Loss of Purpose Financial Issues Grieving of the Loss of a Loved One And Much, Much more...

If you would like more information, or have questions, you can visit http://tesseramethod.com, or you may contact Adam directly at: adam@tesseramethod.com