FOUR WAYS TO MAKE DIVORCE EASIER FOR YOUR CHILDREN

Divorce has been around a long time. But when it is your divorce and your children, it really doesn’t matter how many other people have been through the same situation; you just want to know that your children are going to be okay. So how do you make sure your kids feel safe and unconditionally loved during your divorce?

#1. CLARITY: Divorce is a huge change in a child’s life. Clarity on a possession schedule and/or their living situation is very important for them. Structure in their life is something they want and need. Now there is no guarantee they are going to be happy with what you and your ex have decided to do, but at least have a clear understanding of what the plan is.

#2. CONSISTENCY: Minimize the disruptions in daily routines. Continuing schedules, rules, and structure as best you can, as it will help your children cope with the many changes happening around them. Whether it is doing chores, family fun night, or even discipline, children thrive in environments with regularity.

#3. CONFLICT CONTROL: Ending a marriage can put you and your spouse in a constant state of conflict, frustration, and, sometimes, feelings of hate. When children are involved, finding ways to manage and keep conflict at a minimum are essential. The last thing you want to do is to make them feel like they are caught in the middle of your ongoing war. Putting the animosity aside while co-parenting promotes your children’s best interests. Mediation, creating boundaries, mutual respect and compromise are all useful ways of doing this.

#4. COMMITMENT: Commit to positive co- parenting during your divorce. Reaffirm with your ex that your child’s emotional health is your mutual priority. Show up no matter what is going on with your ex and be there when your kids need to talk. Make sure your kids understand that the end of your marriage is not the end of the parent-child relationship.

Gregory Beane, a Lake Highlands resident, is Board Certified in Family Law by the Texas Board of Legal Specialization and an attorney at Verner Brumley.

4311 Oak Lawn Ave, Suite 450 · Dallas, TX 75219 214·526·5234 · www.vernerbrumley.com

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