THE HAPPY PEOPLE

A simple truth about this complicated demographic

A couple of months ago at a graduation ceremony, I listened as one of the highranking students addressed the crowd with a remarkably complete view of her future.

Her view was remarkable because the newly minted graduate still has quite a bit to learn about how the world actually works.

But no matter. She said something interesting that I’m still thinking about weeks later.

Quoting her father, she talked about striving to achieve this particular piece of advice: Go where the happy people are.

Turns out that pearl probably is derived from a song by “The Trammps” during the 1970s; the song’s about a lonely homebody who “put my blues on the shelf” and headed to a disco to be where the “happy people go.”

That’s a simple piece of wisdom, and it’s more difficult to achieve than it sounds, primarily because finding “happy people” is more challenging as we venture further and further from high school.

Identifying “happy people” is something I’ve thought quite a lot about lately. I’ve learned over the years that “smiling” people aren’t necessarily “happy”; some of them are just really good at looking the part, even if they hurt a lot beneath the surface.

And I’ve learned that “scowling” people aren’t necessarily “unhappy,” since hard work and relentless pressure tends to bend even the strongest among us, curling the face muscles permanently downward even if the attitude inside isn’t necessarily that way.

So if hanging with happy people is a goal, yet finding them isn’t easy, what’s the real message?

Something I’ve noticed over the years is that the people who are happiest seem to have discovered a simple fact of life: You’re likely to be happy if you honestly believe you are really good at something.

From what I can tell, you don’t actually have to be good at a specific task to be happy; you just have to believe you are.

As an example, look at our presidents and those who are candidates for the office: Agree with them or not, they always exhibit the confidence that comes with sincerely believing they are the right man or woman for the job. And no matter how well others think they did in office, they seem satisfied with their effort.

Look at athletes, the elite and the beerdrinking alike: They are good because when the game is on the line, they believe they alone should be taking the shot or fielding the ball.

It works the same with teachers, with waitresses, with day-care workers, with truck drivers — those who believe they are best at what they do want to be in the middle of the action and seem most likely to be happy.

It makes sense: If we believe we’re good at something, we have reason to go home at the end of every day satisfied that we’re making a contribution to our neighborhood, to our companies, to our co-workers, to our friends and to ourselves.

And although simply going home each day happy to have made a contribution may not sound that earthshaking, those of us who have been at this awhile know that if it was all that easy, it wouldn’t be so difficult to “go where the happy people are.”

Rick Wamre is publisher of Advocate Publishing. Let him know how we are doing by writing to 6301 Gaston, Suite 820, Dallas 75214; fax to 214.823.8866; or email rwamre@advocatemag.com.

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Comments

New restaurant

[Benny’s Classic Grill] Hasn’t been open long but the kids and I are regulars already [“New restaurant from Lovers Pizza owners coming to Garland Road,” April 18]. They greet us by name, and the other day they comped our whole meal when we walked in ten minutes before closing. Fast food pricing but healthier choices and of course not supporting the big chains. I love the smoked salmon, artichoke and eggplant panino. I order green-bean fries instead of French fries. —Cindy

Bike lanes

Camp

How about some kind of user fee, such as an annual license/registration for cyclists [“City manager recommends 47 miles of bike lanes in bond package,” June 8]? At least those who use the bike lanes will not shift the burden onto others. After all, the city charges to use golf courses, go to the zoo, arboretum, etc. How about making this special class of citizens, cyclists, pay for their lanes?

Color proofs: because of the difference between the color proofing and the pressroom reasonable variation in color between color job shall constitute an acceptable delivery.

—Citizen Kane

Local street construction is paid for through sales tax, which cyclists already pay. —Stuart

Skillman rezoning

The owner has already run off two daytime small businesses (Paperbacks Plus and the Consignment Solution) and replaced them with a bar-restaurant (Matt’s) because they make more money on the nighttime-use lease [“Neighborhood residents uneasy about Skillman rezoning request,” June 7]. Proof of their real intentions are in the pudding! Second, if the rezoning is approved, it is forever. “Commercial retail zoning” never is rezoned to something to less. If rezoned, the land owner can put anything they want in there that meets zoning — bar, bar-restaurant, etc. So whatever they say now or whatever they may actually want to do now has no bearing on what could go there at anytime in the future.

—Lower Greenville Resident

Winfrey Point parking

attention to spelling, grammar, difference in equipment and conditions pressroom operations, a color proofs and the completed delivery.

Great work, Advocate Gerry Worrall knew about Mary Brinegar’s plans to privatize and commercialize Winfrey Point but said nothing to the stakeholders around the lake [“Advocate Radio: Who’s in charge of Winfrey Point parking?” June 7]. Joan Walne is simply an apologist for Ms. Brinegar’s plans to pave the park. Neither of them have any credibility on this issue. Councilman Kadane usually does the right thing on park matters. So here’s to that. All these appointees and departments report to the elected officials. And if the elected officials don’t do the right thing, we the