contents VOLUME 1 ISSUE 1
DEPARTMENTS
4. Knocked up? Don’t get down. How to maintain a healthy body and mind during pregnancy. 6. Infertility support. You don’t have to face it alone.
16. Are you a tired mommy?. How to ease the burden
of motherhood. 18. Don’t sleep on this advice. Ways to beat the
afternoon slump.
19. Time to buddy up. Friendships are vital to a
woman’s happiness.
22. This makes cents. To succeed financially, live
below your means.
INSIGHTFUL GUIDANCE IN MIND, BODY, SPIRIT, AND FINANCE FOR HER WELL-BALANCED LIFESTYLE. BROUGHT TO YOU BY
← ON THE COVER BFFs
How women balance their lives with strong, and enduring friendships.
WOMEN AND FINANCE
Don’t waste your mind or your money
MOTHERHOOD
Tips for conception, infertility, and coping
May 2019
The right reception for conception Getting pregnant is not just a physical affair. Story: Saskia Roell
Eating healthy foods is essential preparation for your body to conceive. But it’s not the whole picture. Your physical, emotional, and mental bodies work seamlessly together. If you are eating too much junk food, it can create hormonal imbalances. However, if you are relentlessly depriving yourself of foods you love, you are living in a guilty, unhappy mood much of the time. I believe getting pregnant should be fun, not a chore. Fertility is a mind-body affair. Stress affects hormones, not to mention mood and thoughts. Scientific research shows that when mind-body work is included with intrauterine insemination (IUI) and in-vitro fertilization (IVF), the success rate goes from 10-20 percent to 42-52 percent. Of women who did natural conception and a mind-body program, 55 percent were pregnant within six months, and 95 percent got pregnant within two years. Here are steps to ensure you have a healthy body and mind so conception is a wonderful journey you never forget: EAT HEALTHY BUT HAVE FUN
Summer is the perfect time to get your body in shape for your baby. Food has a tremendous effect on your health. It’s important to eat lots of organic fruits, vegetables, lean meat and fish. Taking good supplements can help, but don’t go overboard. Trying to get pregnant destroys your life balance and makes you feel your life is on hold. Your relationship with your husband can be tough because nothing’s fun anymore, and lovemaking is a chore. If you have a glass of wine, you feel guilty and beat yourself up. And you always think you’re not doing enough.
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When I see a woman who feels guilty because she’s had a sip of wine, I see a stressed-out woman who gets cranky on date night with her husband. Getting pregnant is not just a physical affair. It’s important to apply the 80/20 rule. Eat healthily, and every now and then, enjoy something you love. Have your guilty pleasure. Your baby wants a happy mom. When you are happier, your husband is happier. You’re more attracted to him. You see other pregnant women and think, “That’s me!” You begin to believe, behave, and embody your fertile energy. You are in “conceive mode.” Your body can now open up to conceive. CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS NOW
We have 60,000 thoughts every day, with 80 percent of them being negative. Worry creates a contraction in the body. Change your thoughts. For example, change “What if I am too old?” to “What if I am the perfect age to conceive?” My client, Sarah, released her deep fear of miscarriage, changed her daily thoughts, and became pregnant at 43 in four months.
Food has a tremendous effect on your health. It’s important to eat lots of organic fruits, vegetables, lean meat, and fish. Taking good supplements can help, but don’t go overboard. As a certified clinical hypnotherapist and specialist in somatic healing and fertility therapy, I want every woman out there to know there is hope. If you have unexplained infertility, there is almost always a reason—not a medical reason, an emotional one. When I work with clients, we do mind-body work to release the fear keeping them from conception. They enter an emotionally centered, happy state. They change negative self-talk and begin to welcome their babies home. This is why seven out of 10 of my private clients become pregnant. Women ages 35 to 45 get pregnant naturally, usually within two to six months. If you change your thoughts, you mind will change. Your body can relax and let go. Conception becomes easier.
RECONNECT WITH YOUR BODY
A lot of women are focused on what’s wrong with their bodies. Connect to your body again. Before you go to bed, and just after you wake up, place one hand over your heart and think about someone you truly love. And then place your other hand over your belly and imagine that same love and give it to your belly, to your womb. Now you can start connecting both hands from your heart to your belly. Do this for a week, and you’ll notice a shift. You’ll start to connect more to your body. YOUR BABY WANTS TO COME TO YOU
Feed your body healthy food and feed your mind healthy, positive thoughts. If you can feel that little soul sitting on your shoulder, talk to him or her; welcome your baby into your life. My wish for you is to be a happy mom. If you are trying to conceive and would like a little help, find out the No. 1 reason that blocks your baby from coming to you. Go to getpregnantnow.com.
ABOUT THE WRITER → Saskia Roell is a happy, fulfilled mother of five and a successful business owner who takes a bubble bath at 5pm daily. She is an IVF, fertility, and birthing coach expert, as well as a best-selling author.
May 2019
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ways to find support for infertility It can feel like a lonely battle, but you don’t have to face it alone. Story: Hethir Rodriguez
About 10 percent of women, or 6.1 million, in the United States between ages 15 and 44 have difficulty getting pregnant or staying pregnant, and the psychological toll can be great. Undergoing different types of infertility treatment, studies show, exacerbates the emotional pain and anxiety as women wait for news. Those who try a natural fertility approach may initially feel lonely or detached from mainstream doctors because it’s considered a nontraditional path to pregnancy. Most doctors tend to recommend medical interventions such as in vitro fertilization. Many women start researching different options online and try to make a decision; however; it can be confusing and overwhelming, and many couples can’t afford medical interventions. Regardless of which route a woman chooses, high levels of stress kick in, which makes it even more difficult to conceive. Sadness, despair, and loneliness often are part of the journey, and women struggling with infertility need support and sound direction on different levels. I’ve discovered four ways for women to find relief from the stress and sadness of infertility, and to maintain their hope of getting pregnant:
TALK TO SOMEONE YOU TRUST. It really helps
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if you connect with someone who understands what you’re going through—a loved one, therapist, or another woman who has gone through what you’re experiencing.
FIND INSPIRATION. This is a great way to keep
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hope alive. Many women eventually become pregnant after months or years of trying to conceive naturally. The key is to keep trying and never lose hope. There is a path to motherhood for most woman out there: natural conception, medical interventions, sperm or egg donor, or adoption.
MANAGE YOUR STRESS. Stress exacerbates infertility and potentially could make it worse if your body is constantly in the sympathetic nervous system response of fight or flight. Do things to take your mind off conceiving: start yoga, get involved with a spiritual group or your community, spend time volunteering, and practice gratitude for what you have. STAY CONNECTED. This process may take some time, so it’s important to stay motivated and connected with those you’re working with, in whichever fertility path you choose. You need a support structure. Don’t go it alone. When infertility becomes an issue, many women may feel like they have no one to talk to, but as they decide on a path to take, they find they can build a support team, along with a bank of knowledge, that keeps them strong and helps them realize their dream.
ABOUT THE WRITER → Hethir Rodriguez, a certified herbalist for nearly 20 years, is founder and president of naturalfertilityinfo. com, a website focusing on natural fertility, infertility, and reproductive health.
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DOLORES KELLER
GLENDA LAROE
Women and children first
AdventHealth Waterman opens its new Center for Women and Children with special care in mind. Paid Promotional Feature
It’s not uncommon for Glenda LaRoe to be interrupted at a restaurant by someone holding a baby. “You helped with my delivery!” Glenda repeats what they say. She doesn’t always remember names, but she loves the reminder. “It’s such a personal thing and such a blessing to be part of,” says Glenda, who is a nurse at AdventHealth Waterman’s Center for Women and Children and has helped deliver many babies over the last 39 years at the hospital, including some of her co-workers. “I was the nurse for Amber, our nursery nurse, and was at her bedside when she had her daughter,” smiles Glenda. She says sometimes she sees her ‘babies’ throughout the hospital, now professionals working toward a shared mission of patient care.
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Glenda has another connection with those she first met in the delivery room. She was born at Waterman Memorial Hospital when it operated out of the former Fountain Inn in Eustis. Her love of nursing came while working as an aide at Waterman Memorial and at Harry-Anna Crippled Children’s Hospital in Umatilla. “It’s my niche … seeing a life start,” said Glenda who, in addition to a labor and delivery nurse, cares for new moms, women who have had gynecological procedures and children in the pediatric wing. AdventHealth Waterman has invested in the Center for Women by adding new services, remodeling the department and making all rooms private. The hospital’s commitment to advanced care for area women and children continues with the Center for Women and Children’s move to the
new tower on the hospital campus. The new unit is housed on the second floor, above the newly expanded emergency department. Glenda says she looks forward to the changes at AdventHealth Waterman but cherishes the sense of familiarity that pervades within the hospital walls. She says Lake County is a close-knit community and it’s not uncommon that a patient comes in who may be someone she knows. She says that influences the level of care she and her coworkers commit to with each patient. “They may be part of our family. They know somebody that we know,” said Glenda. “In nursing school, we focused on the mind, body and spirit and throughout it hasn’t changed. It goes back to what we’ve always done. What is the most important thing for the patient?”
For Dolores Keller, easing anxiety associated with mammogram screenings is the most important thing she can do for patients. Dolores is an AdventHealth Waterman auxilian who volunteers in the Mammography Center. She is a breast cancer survivor and drives 17 miles each way from her home in Zellwood Station for her shift. “I was diagnosed 16 years ago from a mammogram,” says Dolores, who lived in Atlanta at the time. “The radiologist showed me a tiny spot. It was so tiny that she needed a magnifying glass to see it. I was astonished and shocked.” The diagnosis came as a surprise, she explains, because she has always followed a healthy lifestyle. Dolores’ treatment involved radiation and a lumpectomy. She said, when it was over, “I felt like a million dollars. I went back to what I was doing and in full force.” Dolores eventually moved to Florida. She began volunteering
at the AdventHealth Waterman Mammography Center three years ago where she greets patients and escorts them to and from their screenings. “Every Tuesday when I work, we have approximately 50 patients scheduled and I walk seven miles before the day is done,” said Dolores. She often tells patients her breast cancer history saying, “I’ll share my story to anyone who will listen.” Soon the AdventHealth Waterman Center will offer advanced 3D mammograms. The technology provides a series of images of the breast rather than a single x-ray picture. Radiologists can then view the breast in a series of slices – like flipping through pages in a book – so tissue is seen more accurately. With this advanced technology, there is about a 40 percent improvement in detection of cancers and a reduced rate of patients being called back for repeat scans. Because breast cancer can be easily treated
We’ve come a long way since Lake County’s first hospital opened in a Eustis hotel more than 80 years ago with 18 beds and six bassinets. As our community has grown, so has the need for advanced healthcare services. That hospital which operated out of one floor of the hotel is now AdventHealth Waterman, a 299 bed community hospital with comprehensive big-city medical services. This month, AdventHealth Waterman celebrates a significant advancement in healthcare in Lake County with the opening of its expanded emergency department and its new Center for Women and Children.
when detected early, the 3D mammograms significantly improve the chances of identifying tumors. Dolores stresses the importance of women getting their annual mammogram screening, no matter the age. “I tell everyone to get a mammogram. Mine was found when I was 68 so don’t ever stop,” says Dolores.
1000 Waterman Way, Tavares, FL 32778 / 352.253.3333 / adventhealth.com
May 2019
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These medical professionals are in…
good health Female providers at AdventHealth Medical Group share their views on staying healthy in body, mind, and spirit. Paid Promotional Feature
L- R: Sherryl Gordon-Spence, MD, Rosemary Cirelli, MD, Marilyn Mayne, DO, Gina Guzzi, PA-C, Valerie Thomas, MD, and Mamie Rogers, MD
With May hosting Mother’s Day, it’s natural to focus on women. Working women, busy homemakers, or retirees generally have to deal with full schedules. No matter what your age or the time of your life, stress is a part of it. Balancing life and career, caring for children, tending to older parents, or other life issues, you must take time for yourself. Time to relax, refresh, and renew your spirit. Female medical providers at AdventHealth Medical Group in Lake County are no different from other working women, wives, and mothers who juggle busy lives. Gathered in the AdventHealth Waterman conference room for dinner and discussion, the women gave a glimpse of their world. “It is a juggling act; there’s always something to be doing,” says Dr. Valerie Thomas, a pediatrician who admits to working many hours yet has enjoyed three decades of caring for children while also being a wife and mother.
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“You have to take time to do other things, to be with your family, and do things for yourself to be strong and healthy,” she says. Valerie begins each day at 5:30am with an hour of exercise. “Exercise is the best medicine,” she says. Her colleagues agree. “Exercise is definitely the best,” adds Gina Guzzi, a physician assistant in urology with Drs. Michael Fountain and Jason
Gerboc. “I exercise in the evenings, like 6 to 7:30. I run and do stuff at the gym. I always pretend that I know what I am doing at the gym.” Dr. Marilyn Mayne, obstetrician and gynecologist, enjoys running, walking, and biking around a lake; pediatric hospitalist Dr. Sherryl Gordon-Spence uses a treadmill at her home for exercise. During the dinner conversation, Valerie and Sherryl discovered
they both planned to become obstetricians until they fell for the babies in medical school rotations and decided they’d rather care for children throughout their early years. “My favorite part of being a pediatrician is I like watching a father fall in love with his daughter. It is the most beautiful thing seeing a big man get wrapped around his baby’s finger,” Sherryl says. Valerie cherishes receiving high school and college graduation announcements. “That’s the beauty of pediatrics, you get to watch your patients grow up,” she says. As female medical providers, the women believe it comes naturally to them to empathize and understand what it’s like when a mother worries about her sick child. “Sometimes just a cup of coffee and visiting with the mother means more,” Sherryl says. “It is very humbling.”
MIND
MIND, BODY, AND SPIRIT
Q&A
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What would you do if you had an extra hour in your day? Dr. Mamie Rogers, OB/GYN: “I would actually do a couple things. I would spend a half-hour working out and then enjoy a half-hour of meditation. Meditation is great because it allows you to reflect on what has happened throughout the day.”
What things are still on your to-do list? Dr. Marilyn Mayne, OB/GYN: “I really want to live in West Africa for about a year, just to practice obstetrics and gynecology, and maybe help deliver babies in a village somewhere and teach safe practices in becoming a mother.” Are you kind to yourself? Gina Guzzi, urology physician assistant: “I try to be kind to myself. Something I’m working on as I get older
Gina works with an older population, such as families of patients with dementia. “You may have to explain something 15 times in 15 different ways, but maybe that 16th time is when it strikes the chord,” she says. “It’s worth it when the lightbulb comes on.” “I’m a physician assistant and have two male doctors that I work with, and it often catches me off guard when a 65-year-old male chooses me over the men who may relate to them better,” says Gina, who often hears men say that they appreciate the time she takes to listen. “I do see those who seek me out, and the female patients will say, ‘I’m so glad there is a lady here in the office to talk to about this.’” Valerie finds moms relate to her as a mother and want to know things she did in caring for her children. The doctors caution against relying heavily on the internet or “Dr. Google” for health concerns.
is being mindful how we speak to ourselves. If you’re kind to yourself in your thoughts and actions, then you’ll treat others with respect and be a positive factor in their lives.”
“Parents sometimes are more worried than they should be, because they don’t understand what they are reading,” Valerie says.
So, who do the women go to for a sounding board in their lives? “There’s always your mother,” Sherryl says, grinning.
“I do see those who seek me out, and the female patients will say, ‘I’m so glad there is a lady here in the office to talk to about this.’” — Gina Guzzi, PA-C
BODY What’s your guilty pleasure? Dr. Mamie Rogers: “I love sweets: brownies, cookies, cakes, pies. I have a sweet
tooth and few others and I eat chocolate chip cookies about every day.” What do you do to keep yourself healthy? Dr. Valerie Thomas, pediatrician: “I exercise
every day for an hour. I do whatever I can do that doesn’t hurt me: work-out, dance, walk. I’ve been exercising ever since I was a teenager.”
What is your favorite exercise? Gina Guzzi: “I like to run. I meet with a group of friends after work and it’s a great way to decompress after a workday. I’ve run two half-marathons—one in Key West and one at Disney World.” What’s always in your fridge? Dr. Sherryl Gordon-Spence, pediatric hospitalist: “I am into juicing. I always have my fruits, and I have my blueberries, kale, spinach, as well as other things in my fridge.”
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Ditto for Gina. Gina’s mother is a nurse, and she enjoys having a common bond of both being in the medical field. “For me, I still have questions for my mom about laundry or ‘What should I cook for dinner?’” she says. Sherryl is appreciative of instrumental mentors in her life.
“It’s nice because we realize we are not alone when we may have struggles being a professional, being married, coping with children of different age groups, and we’re sharing parenting tips, school tips.” —Dr. Sherryl Gordon-Spence
SPIRIT What’s the best advice anyone ever gave you? Dr. Sherryl GordonSpence: “For me, it was learning to laugh at yourself, stay humble, and not take life too seriously. I find if you get into a tough situation and you’re tensed or angry, it can rub off on other people and it makes folks uncomfortable. Trying to stay calm, trying to get people relaxed, you get a better outcome.” As a pediatrician, she passes on the same advice
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to new parents: “Take a deep breath, especially new moms.When the mom’s get to that happy, smiling, zen-like glow in their postpartum recovery, that is when the breast milk comes in. If you’re overthinking it and stressed out, it takes longer for the body to cooperate.
to my body and to take care of it better. I would also tell my younger self to protect my knees because that’s been the one limitation to my older self.
would’ve spent more time with her. She was sleeping on the last day I saw her. I kissed her on the forehead but didn’t wake her up. She passed away unexpectedly several days later.”
What would you say to your younger self? Dr. Rosemary Cirelli, pulmonary and sleep medicine: I would tell my younger self to be kind
What day in your life would you like to relive? Dr. Rosemary Cirelli: “It would be the last day I saw my mother before she passed away. I wish I
What inspired you to become a pediatrician? Dr. Valerie Thomas: “I wanted to have a role in helping children to grow up to be healthy
and successful. When I was in medical school doing OB/GYN rotation, I thought I wanted to be an obstetrician until I realized what I really liked about the OB/GYN was the babies. So, I changed courses. I’ve been in practice for 31 years, so I’ve watched them all grow up. I see their babies, some are third generations, and I feel
“If I wasn’t doing this (OB/GYN), I would have probably learned about seven languages.” —Dr. Marilyn Mayne
“My pediatrician in Jamaica was the first person I looked up to, and that was a role model going into pediatrics,” says the newlywed, whose husband is a physician, too. The women are members of a physicians’ providers group that meets for a monthly restaurant dinner outing. “It’s nice because we realize we are not alone when we may have struggles being a professional, being married, coping with children of
I’ve contributed to their lives. It’s been the best thing, and I really enjoy what I do.” If you weren’t doing this, what would you be doing? Dr. Marilyn Mayne: “I would have become a linguist. I love languages. Unfortunately, I only know French and English, but if I wasn’t doing this (OB/GYN),
different age groups, and we’re sharing parenting tips, school tips,” Sherryl says. “It’s good to realize that you are not isolated with the experiences that you are having.” The women made it clear with an empathetic “No!” that they do not watch TV medical shows. “It makes me anxious and very frustrated. They’re not realistic,” Gina says. “I’ll watch old movies from the ’30s, ’40s, the Turner Classic Movies,” Valerie adds. So, what other ways do these women unwind? By taking a nap? “No naps,” Valerie says. “What really relaxes me is going shopping.” “Looking for good bargains,” Sherryl chimes in.
I would have probably learned about seven languages and (be) working for the United Nations or something like that.”
“The thrill of a hunt, all by myself,” Valerie adds. “Shopping for clothing, shoes, it doesn’t matter. It makes no difference.” Being unplugged appeals to Marilyn. “For me, it’s to make sure when I am off on vacation, that I am unplugged and away from it all,” she says, grinning. But when it comes to working, the providers say they enjoy their chosen careers and the patients they serve. “I tell every graduating senior going away to college, ‘Whatever you end up doing with your life, make sure you enjoy it,’” Valerie says, “because you are going to spend more time doing that than you are going to spend at home.”
This evening provided an opportunity for women in healthcare to enjoy time together with peers, something every woman appreciates. Having a place where you can be honest, caring, and supportive is important for women, especially in today’s busy world. AdventHealth encourages creating a life of whole health by addressing not only physical health, but emotional and spiritual needs of every person. To learn more visit AdventHealthMedicalGroup.com or call 407.599.6111 for appointment availability.
What does spirituality mean to you? Gina Guzzi: “For me, it means mostly being at peace with yourself and feeling confident (about) what you do on a daily basis.”
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A mother’s love comes through What to do when motherhood doesn’t turn out to be perfect. Story: Kathy Chlan
Walking down the aisle 26 years ago to my Prince Charming, I wouldn’t have guessed my fairy tale would include a consistent number of roadblocks. I was dreaming of that house with the white picket fence, the great career to take me to new heights, and the fabulous, perfect children to make our family complete. Well, let me just say that God definitely laughed in my face. My journey was gonna be the ride of my life. But I can tell you honestly today: I would not change a single thing! My oldest, Casey, is developmentally and learning disabled. He is 25 and went through the special education system during his school years and graduated high school at age 21. From the first few days after his birth, I sensed something was not right. That maternal instinct kicked in full force. Casey was diagnosed with so many medical and feeding issues that it was overwhelming. The first few years, we took him to 15 doctors. You know it’s bad when you begin to call doctors by their first names. He lost all his hair, which is called alopecia, when he was 2 years old, and it never grew back. There were an unbelievable number of hospital stays for weeks on end. I would live there for two weeks at a time and then go home for a couple of weeks. The cycle continued like that for a while. Total hospital stays were about 16.
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But I made a monumental decision during that time. This was the hand I was dealt, and I was not going to let it swallow me up. I was not going to be that woe-is-me girl who craved attention from her friends and that sorrowful look. I would wipe that look right from their faces! I made it my mission to teach Casey not to use his disability or adversities as a crutch, and to try to have some fun along the way. I come from a family filled with very funny women. When the crap hit the fan, so to speak, the room often would be filled with laughter. Our family motto was “Laughing is so much better than crying.” My father reminded me of this when I felt the walls closing in, along with other powerful sayings: “Life is like a card game. It is not about the hand you get, but how you play that hand. Play it with dignity and grace.” Casey has sure done that and more. Why couldn’t I do the same? Casey and his brother, Christian, are the two greatest accomplishments of my life. They are incredible men with big hearts who can make a room burst into laughter. That is a gift that I hope they carry with them throughout their lives.
So, if you ever feel like this roller-coaster ride of motherhood is not what you expected, here are some tips that helped me get through:
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DON’T COMPARE YOUR CHILDREN TO YOUR FRIEND’S. And don’t compare what kind of mom you are to what kind of mom your friends are. Stop the insanity. Every child has their own different journey, whatever that may be, and every mom has her own unique way of raising them.
NEVER BEAT YOURSELF UP OVER YOUR MISTAK ES, because there are going to be years’ worth—it is inevitable. This job never ends no matter how old your kids get. So, give yourself some grace along the way.
TRY TO TAK E TIME FOR YOURSELF. As moms, we’ve heard this a thousand times, but do we even do it? No matter what, we can never lose ourselves. Fight for that. A happy mom makes for happy kids, so lose the guilt at the door and be kind to yourself.
FIND THE JOY! Life goes by so fast and you blink and they grow up. Enjoy the small moments and take one day at a time. By doing this, you breathe and see the small moments more clearly and enjoy the process along the way.
But, most of all, embrace the chaos and uncertainty. There is no perfect family in the world. All families have their loops and curves on that roller-coaster ride. Believe me, laughing while being whipped around will get you through every miserable day. That, and a bottle of wine!
ABOUT THE WRITER → Kathy Chlan is the author of “Maternally Challenged: How My Special Needs Son Taught Me to Sack Up and Laugh” and the writer behind the popular website unfilteredmom.com.
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SPEND FIVE MINUTES IN NATURE
Just five simple minutes sitting in nature improves mood, decreases negative feelings, and increases your sense of awe and wonder at being part of something bigger than yourself, according to a study published recently in the Journal of Positive Psychology. If you have more time, combine being in nature with exercise. This can include hiking or simply taking a walk through a park lined with trees. This can reduce your heart rate and improve your ability to recover from stressful events. BRING THE OUTDOORS IN
Feeling overwhelmed and can’t leave the building? Hang paintings of nature scenes on the walls, look out a window, or watch a nature scene on your video device. It seems that even a picture of nature has the potential to reduce feelings of stress. BREAK OUT THAT ADULT COLORING BOOK
Can’t absorb any new information? Take a break and take out the adult coloring book you have not taken the time to use. This distraction gives the brain the space it needs to tackle the problem while you focus on the joys of choosing the colors that make you feel better. Pro tip: Choose yellow and other bright colors if you need a pick-me-up.
Enjoy an energetic afternoon 5 tips to get through your midday slump. Story: Eudene Harry
We have all felt it. After lunchtime, you’re lethargic, tired, and constantly checking the clock waiting for the day to be over. But, fear not! Your day no longer will be ruined by the afternoon lull. Here are some quick tips to avoid the midday slump and allow you to end your day rejuvenated:
INCORPORATE NATURAL MIDAFTERNOON BOOSTS
Grab some green tea; it is high in antioxidants, contains a small amount of caffeine, and also has an ingredient that can help create a sense of calmness. If you combine this with a little aromatherapy, either peppermint or lemon for a quick lift or lavender to keep the calm going, you might find yourself feeling better after a quick 10-minute break. QUICK EXERCISES TO DO AT YOUR DESK
These release stress and restore a sense of calm while improving moods. Do any exercise that helps bring the heart rate up a little. First, do some quick triceps extensions using a chair. Follow with a stretch that relieves tension. Shrug shoulders up to the ears and gently rotate forward then backward. Follow this with an open stance, arms open wide and slightly raised as if to open yourself up to receive warmth, love, and support, then simply cross your arms around your shoulders and give yourself a hug. Cross your arms until you feel the muscles in the upper back gently stretch and start relieving some of that built-up tension. Bonus: Hugs help relieve stress and improve moods. LAUGH AND BREATHE
Laughing decreases cortisol levels and improves moods. A simple way is to watch a funny clip or record a baby’s laughter and listen to it. That sound of pure joy and wonder can bring a smile back to your face and do wonders for your mood. Lastly, practice stopping and breathing; four counts in, hold for four seconds and release for four seconds. Do this about four times and feel the stress slowly ebb away.
ABOUT THE WRITER → Dr. Eudene Harry is the medical director for Oasis Wellness and Rejuvenation Center, a wellness practice devoted to integrative holistic care. She is a veteran physician with more than 20 years of experience. Dr. Harry earned her medical degree and performed her residency at Thomas Jefferson University in Philadelphia.
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Left to right: Maureen Terrien, Eileen Sklon, Diane Brunovsky and Bev Katsoulis
You gotta have friends Close friendships are a vital part of a woman’s life. Story: Leigh Neely Photo: Douglas Tyler
You’d have to be living in a cave not to know that eating healthy food, exercising, and finding a positive way to deal with stress are essential to living longer. For women, however, another essential part of that regimen is close friendships. “With women today, their lives are full, they have a lengthy task list, and friendships are suffering because of this,” says Dr. Nisha Jackson, hormone
and natural health specialist in Oregon. “Often, women don’t realize how to optimize their health with friendship.” Dr. Jackson advocates getting a “Girl Squad” to fully enjoy the positive and continual support from other women. The author of “Brilliant Burnout: How Successful, Driven Women Can Stay in the Game by Rewiring Their Bodies, Brains, and Hormones,” Dr. Jackson says burnout is one of the largest epidemics
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among modern women. Her book offers information to help women thrive while meeting the demands of home and career and keeping themselves on track. “The benefits of positive and continued support from friendships with other women is vital,” Dr. Jackson says. “Brigham Young University did research about social interaction for women and found those who had regular, planned social activities lived longer.” It’s well known that men and women think differently, are emotionally different, and women are more intuitive than men. For example, women often can tell by the tone of a voice on the phone if there is a problem or if something good has happened. They share secrets and their lives and often clothes, makeup, or uncomfortable things like, “You have broccoli in your teeth.” A 2011 article in the Journal of Clinical Oncology states that researchers at Vanderbilt-Ingram Cancer Center and doctors at Shanghai Institute of Preventive Medicine found that women who had satisfaction with their marriage, close ties with family, and close friends had a 38 percent reduction in the risk of mortality with breast cancer, and a 48
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All women have circumstances where they have to face the truth of a situation. You may be too close to the situation to see the big picture, and a wise friend can help you back up and view it as you should.
percent lower risk of recurrence when compared with those who did not have close relationships. Dr. Jackson recommends that women have three types of friends in their “tribe”: the fearless adventurer, a wise counselor confidante, and a loyal bestie. If you work hard at home and at your job, you need to know there will be time for breaking loose and leaving that behind. Your adventurous friend will encourage you to play and laugh, releasing the endorphins that make you feel good. You also may feel great pride in doing something daring like riding a zip line or reading a risqué romance novel. All women have circumstances where they have to face the truth of a situation. It may involve setting tougher boundaries for a child or accepting responsibility
for moving a parent to a safer place. Whatever it is, it’s good to have a friend who listens to everything you say—how bad you feel, why you don’t want to do this, how it hurts you. You may be too close to the situation to see the big picture, and a wise friend can help you back up and view it as you should. Bev Katsoulis, Diane Brunovsky, Maureen Terrien, and Eileen Sklon became friends after moving to The Villages. “Bev and I have been friends for 14 years because we met when we moved in, and I became friends with Diane and Maureen through the photography club,” Eileen says. “Through her scrapbooking, Bev became a member of the photography club.” “Now it’s the basis of our friendship,” Diane adds. “We also don’t mind shopping and lunch. We do luncheons in our homes, and we occasionally include husbands at dinners.” The women say they share thoughts about their children and grandchildren—the good and bad times—and they have a lot of good laughs. “I would feel lost without you guys,” Eileen says to her friends. “Boy, do we have fun when we go on overnight trips.”
DR. NISHA JACKSON’S TIPS FOR IMPROVING SOCIAL CONNECTIVITY
• Don’t use the internet as your only social support. This superficial connection often is not deep enough to really help someone feel “heard,” confirmed, supported, or energized. • Visit or call to meet a neighbor, coworker, or relative that you typically don’t spend time with. • Engage in a group sports activity or just find someone to walk with. This is not only great physically, it’s also a great way to break the ice, loosen up, and connect with others.
“We have cocktails in our room and then go down and have cocktails, too,” Maureen adds. Dr. Jackson says strong friendships benefit not only physical health but also can help reduce depression in women and men. Connecting socially supports the stress response in the brain that controls cortisol production, known otherwise as the stress hormone. This, in turn, reduces anxiety and mood swings, aids sleep, and even helps regulate glucose or blood sugar. “Life is full of moments of beauty, kindness, and triumph that we usually fail to notice because we’re so wrapped up in our own concerns,” Dr. Jackson says. “Today, most women hear from society or repeat in their minds the messages: ‘think big,’ ‘go for more,’ ‘climb the ladder
of success.’ But if you’re trying to do this without the help and support of others close to you, it will be an unpleasant and lonely grind.” Bev, Eileen, Diane, and Maureen admit they’ve become so close they share the same tastes in many things. During a photography convention, they all showed up with black-andwhite-striped shirts. “It was completely unintentional,” Maureen says, “but the next year we wore them for fun!” “Many times at lunch, we’ll all order the same things,” Bev adds. “And we always have something to talk about.” They call themselves the Lens Friends because of the photography connection and Diane adds, “We have a different viewpoint, that’s all.”
• Go on a date. This could be with your partner and another couple or just a date with someone you’d like to get to know or anyone you feel would enhance your connections.
• Be a joiner. Find groups with common interests and a place for potential friends. • Write to a family member. Letters communicate love and appreciation. • Call a friend. Talk to them instead of texting or emailing. You’ll be glad you did. • Recognize moments that work. Pay attention every day to moments that worked well for you and made your day easier so you stay positive. • Put down your work and call it a day. Enough said. • Load up on funny friends. Find people who will give you a good belly laugh. • Host a potluck dinner. It won’t cost much and helps you connect.
• Socialize as a family. Invite another family for dinner and games.
• Invite friends for a comedy movie night. A great stress reliever for BFFs.
• Get away from the TV and computer screens. Do something face-to-face with people.
• Reconnect with nature. A little sunlight, the sounds of nature, fresh air—no-cost ways to reduce stress.
• Volunteer. Helping others is always beneficial to them and to you.
• Find humor in your life. Instead of complaining, laugh about frustrations and aggravations.
May 2019
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Keys to financial survival Here are some smart tips to help you live below your means. Story: BE Conrad
It does not matter if you make $30,000 a year, $300,000 a year, or $3 million a year; if you spend more than you make, you will end up in financial distress. And while making more money does provide additional flexibility and freedom, even high-income individuals can find themselves in bankruptcy court. If you need proof that income and financial wellness are not always tightly correlated, look no further than the National Football League. These talented players earn enormous sums of money, but their careers are generally short. When those careers are over, some players find themselves back where they started, and bankruptcies are not uncommon. Even lottery winners can end up back in the poorhouse. There have been many high-profile cases of former lottery winners who regretted buying those fateful tickets, and while that is not the norm, it certainly is a cautionary tale. So, whether you are a former NFL player, a lucky lottery winner, or an ordinary worker, the key to financial security is learning to live below your means. Here are some strategies to make it happen:
BE CONFIDENT BUT REALISTIC Confidence is a key component of financial security and a characteristic that most financially secure men and women have in common. These confident individuals know how to create, and stick to, a household budget. They are savvy enough to pay themselves first, prioritizing saving and investing. Their confidence extends to the investment arena, where they seek out the best and lowestcost vehicles for preserving and growing their wealth. But they also know what they do not know and they are not afraid to seek professional help and guidance when they need it. This balance between confidence and overconfidence is a key underpinning of financial success and a skill that can be cultivated.
WEAR SOCIAL BLINDERS No matter how much money you make, there always will be someone who is making, and spending, more than you do. Social envy and the desire for status can derail even the smartest budget, so put your social blinders on and be happy with what you already have. The financially secure are less concerned than most with social status, and seemingly untroubled by envy. Instead, they are happy to be where they are, knowing they are living within their means and saving money for the future.
FOCUS ON VALUE, NOT JUST PRICE Bargain shopping is one way to squeeze more out of every dollar earned, but it is not always the best choice. The financially savvy know that true value often means paying a bit more for top quality, and they know the difference between a low price and a real value. People who consistently live within their means also recognize that buying quality used products can do more than save money. From quality antique furniture to amazing vintage clothing, used items often rival, and exceed, comparable products in terms of both price and value.
When it comes to getting out of debt and growing wealth, spending less than you make is definitely the place to start. Actually, it is easier said than done, and requires a change in attitude, the adoption of new habits, and the cultivation of new strategies. These strategies can help you become more financially secure so you can start building a better future.
May 2019
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