Aly P’s Life Hackz IT’LL BE OKAY!
“Sometimes life can be tough, and that really sucks”
– Aly Petersen
About the author’s decision to make this book. It was a hard decision to write this book.
time and space to be relevant to anyone,
For years people have demanded that I
anywhere that is taking part in the weird
share the wisdom that keeps me going
journey we call life.
through the hardships of high school, strict parents, a body that hates me and is actively trying to have me killed by natural selection, and being a teenager in a world that doesn’t understand me.
The making of this guide coincided with an end to a very long journey in my life and this outlet provided the perfect way to reflect on what has become clear to me over the last 7 years of my life.
I made this decision with lots of thought
Some things can be hard, some can be
and deliberation. I also used a thesaurus
less so but there are always tips to make
because I cannot think of enough
it easier.
different words to fill a decent sized eBook. I sincerely hope and wish that this eBook becomes the treasure that I know deep down it is. That it is able to bestow upon others the wisdom I have compiled in my brain over my long 18 years of life. That it can withstand the troubles of
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Those I couldn’t have done it without.
Firstly, to my editor and idea-bouncer, Ronald. This project felt like a random idea that was created out of boredom one day (because it was) and look at it now. The humour in these pages wouldn’t have been achievable without your support. To those that contributed without knowing, yes, I asked you for help and you didn’t even realise (mwaha). I also paraphrased what you suggested so no, there are no copyright infringements. Also I love you all and Life Hack #13 goes out to you all. Special mentions to; Hammers, you probably expected this to be a lot cooler than it is. Sorry I didn’t tell you, I’m annoying and wanted to surprise you... SURPRISE! (Also sorry this took an extra week) Elroy, the font choice was 1000% a decision to annoy you. I hope you hate every minute of this beautiful guide. (But also enjoy my wisdom) Lastly, to myself. You are incredible. You made this and should be extremely proud. You go girl!! (The one thing I learnt making this wonderful eBook was that you can never have enough self love.) Disclaimer: please don’t take this seriously xoxo
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1 ALWAYS BACK YOURSELF, EVEN WHEN NO ONE ELSE WILL
YOU are YOUR own greatest asset!
Sometimes in life it seems that nothing
ability to be your own saviour, to lift
is going right. Unfortunately this will
yourself up from despair when you need
occur frequently and is something that
happiness. Tell yourself a funny story!
we must all come to accept. Yet there is
Look yourself in the mirror and say that
a way to combat against this negativity
you look bomb af today. Because you
even when everything around you seems
deserve to back yourself, you deserve
bleak and hopeless; YOU! You have the
that support. Be the one you need.
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2 NEVER REJECT FREE FOOD, UNLESS YOU ARE ALLERGIC
Never risk YOUR safety. YOU are YOUR priority!
In life, one of the very best possible
the immediate and only response is
things is free food. Well, good free
“YES!” There is one exception; if you are
food. For humans to stay in the land of
allergic. No food is worth the allergic
living we must eat, but eating can be
reaction. (Though, no pain, no gain.) Don’t
expensive and stressful. Food can be so
let free food go to waste, think of all
expensive sometimes it’s just not fair.
the children in Africa that would love to
So when someone offers you free food,
have your free food. Do it for them!!!! 4
3 TAKE SOME TIME OUT TO CHILLAX
Make sure you rest and have time to yourself!
Sometimes life can be a little rough.
working. Therefore it is IMPERATIVE
Sometimes it can be stressful. Through
that we take time to chill and relax (chill
these times, we need to remember the
+ relax = chillax) so we don’t stress our
positives, the peaks of the mountains
way into a nervous system breakdown.
when we are stuck in the valley. BUT,
(It can happen, google “Adrenal Fatigue”
this can be hard when constantly
symptoms, it might be too late for you...)
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4 THINK IT OUT! BEFORE YOU SPEAK IT OUT!
Words can hurt and you don’t want to cause any unnecessary damage!
Words have been deemed to hurt less
everyone’s individual responsibility to
than stick and stones but arguably this
filter EVERY! SINGLE! word they say to
is untrue. Words stick with you longer
prevent it from hurting others. Freedom
than a bruise takes to fade and you
of speech? That’s so 1990s. Political
remember words for longer than a
correctness is the latest fad and it’s
broken bone takes to mend. It is
definitely here to stay forever! YAY!
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5 WRITE DOWN THINGS YOU WANT TO DO
Aim to achieve these things, but it won’t KILL you if you don’t.
If you write something down, it’s like a
what you want to achieve. But the best
promise to yourself. A mini contract that
part of writing it down is that if you
only the paper and yourself know about.
don’t achieve it, there are many ways to
When you write down something you
destroy the evidence and pretend you
want to achieve, such as; go for a walk,
never wrote it in the first place.
you and the paper are aware of this goal.
(Ripping, Shredding, Fire, Water, Dog
This encourages you to go and achieve
eating, just to name a few!)
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6 HAVE GOALS; BUT NOT TOO BIG BECAUSE THEY ARE HARD TO ACHIEVE
Be hopeful but don’t set yourself up for failure. Failing is NEVER fun.
Having goals is good. The feeling you get
rocket ship is WAY too hard of a goal. A
when you achieve goals is profound. Yet
better idea? Going to the shopping
sometimes it can seem impossible to
centre. Some shopping centres even have
succeed at these goals. Therefore I
a space-like aesthetic. To be more
have devised a method of being able to
authentic, wear a dress up astronaut
achieve all your goals; by having easily
suit. But hire it, don’t buy it (that shit’s
achievable goals. E.g. going to space in a
expensive to buy.)
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7 EXPECT NOTHING AND APPRECIATE EVERYTHING
If you have low expectations, you’ll ALWAYS be pleasantly surprised.
This is my life motto. Being happy is
nothing from any possible outcome so
something that is important to me and a
that if something good happens it’s a
way to achieve this is by being pleasantly
welcome turn of events. Furthermore,
surprised at all times. My method of
you must appreciate everything that
guaranteeing that you are constantly
does occur. Accidentally ruin a top? It’s
pleasantly surprised is by expecting
just an opportunity to buy a new one!
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8 HAVE HIGH STANDARDS AND DON’T LOWER THEM FOR ANYONE
You always deserve the best. You deserve NOTHING less than the BEST!
This can apply to many different life
the best. So you must make sure that
scenarios. For example, your standards
your friends are the best possible people
with relationships, both platonic and
and that your romantic interests are
romantic. Despite being able to back
genuine and kind. Furthermore, even if
yourself, you might need others to
you’re a 7/10 on a good day, don’t settle
support you in your life and you deserve
for a 5/10! You always deserve a 10/10!
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9 MAKE LISTS OF SIMPLE THINGS YOU’LL DO ANYWAYS
It makes you feel like you’ve achieved SOMETHING within your day and you can go to bed with a smile.
This is one of my favourite life hacks.
terrible feeling. Therefore, include daily
Each day it helps to make a list of all the
activities such as; brush teeth, shower,
things you need to do, but occasionally
eat lunch, go outside, breathe multiple
these things can be complicated and
times, etc.! Then at the end of the day
require lots of time. When the day ends
there are plenty of things that can be
and nothing has been completed; it’s a
checked off and you’ve succeeded.
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10 REMEMBER TO STOP AND SMELL THE FLOWERS
They tend to smell amazing, especially during spring!
Flowers are actually one of the best
sad. So, if you’re in the mood for
things ever. Flowers in the wild
something uplifting, head on down to a
especially! As much as I love a good
garden (or even a flower show) and fulfill
bouquet of flowers, the idea of cutting a
your heart’s desires to see all the
living, breathing organism out of the
flowers. Don’t forget to smell their
ground for aesthetic purposes is quite
lovely fragrances too!
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11 NEVER BE AFRAID TO DOUBLE TEXT.
Fear of double texting only increases the fear of the response. Be WILD! Be FREE!
Double texting, to some, is a very scary
at once, so send it off as you think of it!
phenomenon that they fear not even
Be free with your stream of
dare to attempt. I am the queen of
consciousness (filter it before you send
Double Texting. I have been known to
it though. Refer to #4.) Don’t limit
sexdecuple (16) text on occasion.
yourself to single texts, live on the wild
Texting is like speaking, sometimes you
side!
can’t think of everything you want to say 13
12 DON’T HOLD ON TO THE PAST. LET IT GO AND MOVE ON.
Build yourself a metaphorical bridge and get OVER it.
Sometimes the past is awesome, which is
is no use dwelling on things that are
good. Sometimes the past is absolutely
unable to help or change us now. What
shocking, which is not good. But a
we can change is the present and the
common element in both these things is
future so focus on moving forward,
that the past is past. Therefore one
instead of backwards, just like a
must leave the past where it is as there
kangaroo and emu would do.
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13 CREATE AND CONFIDE IN CLOSE FRIENDSHIPS
Friends are there for you when YOU are UNABLE to back yourself.
Friends are the best things in life. Sure
and share you interests and passions.
you have family but you are stuck with
Being able to confide a secret or worry
what you got given at birth and
with a friend makes a hard and difficult
sometimes there can be issues. Friends?
situation much easier to deal with and
You get to choose them! They are people
can reduce one’s stress dramatically.
who understand you, that respect you
Trust your friends to support you!
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14 TALK TO ALL THE ANIMALS. THEY UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING.
They can HELP you study, cry, express your emotions and work through a complex sudoku.
Where would anyone be if it wasn’t for
clever mammals. Talk to them! For all we
their trusty animal companion? As
know, all dogs might be able to
humans we are #blessed with our smart
understand and speak Italian! Don’t
consciousness and we act like we are the
underestimate their abilities as they are
smartest organism. In reality, we are
the best animals to have around in a
surrounded by equally complex and
crisis and provide love and support.
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15 LISTEN TO TRASHY POP MUSIC EVEN IF YOUR FRIENDS HATE ON YOU.
Once you back yourself, no one can hurt you for saying One Direction is trash
Backing yourself is life hack #1 because
do you! If you want to listen to Lady
it’s important. Everything is possible
Gaga or Ke$ha on repeat, DO IT! Plus, no
once you back yourself, such as listening
one can dispute the fact that 2000s pop
to trashy pop music. (I write this as I
music makes any scenario nearly 200
listen to the One Direction Discography.)
times more enjoyable. (Haven’t you heard
Screw what the ‘HATERZ’ tell you, you
Mr. Brightside go off at a party?)
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16 MULTITASK TO BE MORE EFFICIENT WITH YOUR TIME
Always have AT LEAST two conversations and study occurring at the same time. It works wonders.
Multitasking is the essence of a
studying. Disclaimer; there are
successful life. There are so many things
situations where multitasking is a big NO
that are made easier but doing them
GO! Such as; driving and texting (BIG
together, examples of these include;
NO!), talking and eating (only a minor NO
eating and listening, eating and watching
but not the best) and lastly, sleeping and
TV, texting and talking, texting and
walking. (It results in all sorts of issues.)
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17 DON’T TRAP YOUR IDENTITY. ALLOW YOURSELF TO EVOLVE CONSTANTLY
Be like a tamagotchi that has unlimited evolutions. Constantly reinvent yourself or stay the same.
The YOU you are now and the YOU you
and the things you experience! Never
were last year are different. You might
feel like you need to limit yourself to one
even be different to the YOU you were
label or type. You are a tamagotchi that
last week! Your personality and identity
can grow and evolve forever. You never
is constantly shifting and forming based
have to be static! Stay as you are for as
on the people you surround yourself with
long or as little time as you wish!
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18 DON’T LET YOUR GRADES TRY TO DEFINE YOU
Grades are evil and will be constantly out to get you. Stay strong and stay in control.
Grades and school results have a mind of
POSSIBLE! 1. Remember that they have
their own. They have this hidden agenda
no control over you! 2. Remember that
to try and overthrow your control in your
being a good person is irrelevant to the
life, remove all your happiness and bring
chemical structure of a fatty acid. 3.
out the worst in you. These things are all
Remember numbers are just lines on a
tough to combat but with a little help
page and grades are just an assortment
from family and friends. IT IS
of squiggles on a piece of paper.
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19 BEING GOOD AT EVERYTHING IS OVERRATED AND REALLY F*CKING HARD TO DO
It’s easier if you just don’t even try. Chose a couple of things I guess, but not EVERYTHING!
I have some personal experience with
loves a Jack of All Trades, we all admire
this topic, and its super bloody draining
people who are talented in one area to
trying to be amazing at everything you
the extent where they are admired and
do! Mastering something is much more of
praised. This sort of achievement is
an achievement than being ok at
worth much more as you get the
everything. Despite how much everyone
accolade you deserve for less tasks!
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20 IF YOUR FRIENDS PUT YOU DOWN, THEY PROBABLY AREN’T YOUR FRIENDS
Unless it’s typical banter between the squad, because that’s acceptable, MOST of the time.
First it is important to differentiate
might believe they are joking, their
between banter and put downs. Banter is
words hurts (Refer to tip #4) and can be
reciprocal and friendly in nature; no one
tough to hear. These word-sayers that
cries after a sesh of good banter.
are harsh and non-banterous are not
Bullying and being put down is quite
TRUE friends, because true friends are
different. Though even the word-sayer
there to pick you up, not put you down!
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21 DON’T THINK ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS AFTER DEATH.
Because it’s probably NOTHING and we all just rot away. But that’s quite sad so just don’t think about it.
Death is an interesting concept. It’s
but in reality no one really knows what
something that we are all faced with
happens after death. Treat life like the
from an early age when someone we know
blessing it is and try to the best of your
(probably an elderly family member)
ability to enjoy every day that we get to
passes away. There’s the polite way to
be here on earth. If you’re religious,
explain it (they’re in a better place now)
believe in your afterlife, otherwise...
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22 MAKE FRIENDS ONLINE BECAUSE THEY ARE TOTALLY RAD & SUPPORTIVE
Ignore your guardian that tells you about cyber safety. That only applies sometimes.
Everyone has experienced those cyber
possible to create long lasting
safety chats in primary school about
friendships. If you’re wary of someone,
safe usage of Club penguin or in High
ask them to snapchat you (it’s hard to
School about privacy on your Facebook
fake that). If they have less than 3
profile. But don’t stress too much about
different types of social media that
creating online friendships. It is possible
feature their face, thats suss too and
to figure out who is fake and it is
abort mission ASAP! 24
23 TAKE YOUR MENTAL HEALTH SERIOUSLY. IT’S IMPORTANT.
If you experience mental health issues, talk to someone. DON’T suffer alone.
In an entirely serious note, your mental
your life. Make sure there are people you
health is one of the most important
trust that are aware of difficulties you
things. It can sometimes seem like
may be facing and never be afraid to
something that can be ignored or that
seek out a mental health professional.
isn’t as important as physical illnesses
You are your #1 priority.
but it still has a very large impact on
Beyond Blue: 1300 224 636 25
24 GO TO BED BEFORE 11PM. NOTHING GOOD HAPPENS AFTER 11PM.
Unless you are at a party, then EVERYTHING good happens after 11pm.
(This is ironic because I’m writing this at
know this due to too many tired days
11:57 pm, so maybe this advice is void.
from going to sleep at 3am. 2nd scenario;
That presents a real issue doesn’t it?)
Parties. Don’t leave the party until you
1st scenario: Day to day life. After 11pm,
are kicked out or are about to fall
that’s when sleep should occur. I know
asleep. Ideally, fall asleep at the party;
this due to many doctors’ advice, I also
combine two good things into one!
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25 ALWAYS FOLLOW YOUR OWN ADVICE
If you don’t, you look like a hypocritical DOUCHEBAG.
Giving advice; easy. Follow it? Super
either, follow your own advice. Trust
duper hard. When making hard decisions
your gut instincts, as lame as this
sometimes it’s extremely complicated to
sounds, because a lot of the time your
choose the right option. If possible,
intuition is smarter than you could ever
research it. If not possible, ask for
imagine. Plus, no one likes a hypocrite so
advice from others. If that isn’t possible
make sure you practise what you preach.
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THE END Thank God it’s Over
“All good things come to an end”
– Aly Petersen
Remember to Live Laugh Love!