The Perspective The Normalization of Black Girl

The Perspective

By Antonio Hickman

I’m writing my article literally at the last minute. These last 3 weeks have been amazing from a few different perspectives. I’ve had the opportunity to put myself in other people shoes, sort of speak. I was able to speak with women ranging from the ages of 25 to 31 and one woman was in her early forties.

They all had one thing in common: they didn’t date because they don’t trust men. Especially men from Las Vegas (that came from two of the women). I understand their perspective with an open mind. Men and women are both flawed! Each and everyone of us will go through our trials in life. Which leaves me to look at life through different lenses; of what things truly are in life and not what they should be. We could often find ourselves missing the big picture.

What’s more important than one’s character? I ask this question because as a man, I understood why they would be reluctant to date. The expectations of anyone telling the truth would be real! However, giving a person a choice to accept the truth lies within the character of both individuals. Women would you date a married man? I’ll answer this: YES! Men, would you date a married woman? YES!

Investing your time and energy in a person is like investing in the stock market. A risk is involved for either party. We hope the value of that man or woman shows potential growth. However, we know it takes both parties to make a relationship work and not to see what you can get out of someone. So, why would a married man or woman go outside of their marriages? Flesh holds no value to the credo of what marriage represents. This is lesson I learned firsthand.

To have a perspective, we must see things as they are. Do we continue to suffer or do we choose to grow? To my beautiful women out there, no sin Is greater than the other. Believe me, a peace of mind is everything! And with love, comes divinity. Loving self first is required to see your divine purpose. This also applies to the men as well. We also must know our self-worth.

Men disregard having a relationship as soon as a woman shows no respect or appreciation for being a good man. More likely than not, they’re caught up in their own bravado. Talking to these young women left me thinking: what’s in store for my daughters? As a man, and knowing what the world is, I want them to understand who they are. I don’t want them to be cynical, bitter, nor afraid to love. Make good choices in a man’s character. That’s my job as a father: to lead by example and teach them not to get caught up with the idea of love, however, to see things as they are and to discern the difference between infatuations and love.