Partnering with a therapist to strengthen your child’s EQ

In the busyness of life, many of us grew up thinking we must keep going despite how we feel, and if symptoms of mental illness are not screaming at us, then we are “fine.” In other words, because our symptoms are not always visible, we often neglect considering therapy until things get extremely bad. In my experience, many adults who started therapy later in life had symptoms that began in childhood and would have benefitted from seeing a therapist in their youth. Statistics show that 50% of mental health problems are established by age 14 and 75% by age 24, with it taking an average of 11 years after symptoms first appear for an individual to seek treatment.

Due to many common barriers surrounding mental health, parents tend to seek therapy for their child as a last resort when they experience difficulties at home and school - often after exhausting all other options. While more attentiondemanding symptoms like anger issues, wishing to harm themselves or others, or crippling depression are valid reasons to consider therapy for your child, therapy can still be beneficial for children with more subtle symptoms like social withdrawal, acting out, or experiencing the impact of recent life events.

Therapy is an individualized process where kids can acknowledge their own experiences and develop coping skills to work through their emotions, also known as strengthening their EQ, or emotional intelligence. In therapy, kids build confidence, social and emotional awareness, conflict resolution, anger management, problem-solving tools, stress management skills, selfawareness, and self-discovery (Many of us could use these skills even though our lives appear normal and healthy).

Although these skills can be taught at home, parents may run into roadblocks when they try to fix a child’s symptoms rather than address the root of their behavioroften unknowingly bringing in their own predispositions and biases. Alternatively, therapists are trained to put aside their beliefs and biases to hear their client’s voice and help them build healthier living habits. Throughout this process, parents can partner with their child’s therapist, ask questions, and receive advice as they support their child’s mental well-being.

While therapy is a safe place for children to share their experience and find support, it is also important for parents to create this space at home. Teaching a child healthy way to identify and manage their emotions at a young age will encourage them to avoid hiding their problems and know that they never have to face them alone. Each child not only has different experiences, but they also react to those experiences in different ways - even within the same family. Validate these experiences and normalize conversations around mental health, allowing kids to feel seen, heard, and acknowledged – knowing that no problem or feeling is too small to receive support or too large to overcome.

Summit Counseling Center is offering therapy groups for students throughout the summer, teaching skills to overcome anxiety, develop social skills, prepare for college, and more. Learn more about our groups and register your child at tinyurl. com/sccsummer23.