Jennifer Bonn

Focus on Improving Your Relationships

BY JENNIFER BONN

I always think of February as the love month, and love is the key in our relationships. It’s so important to strengthen our bonds with family and friends, and build our communities. So, this February, let’s improve the way we interact with each other.

There are many different types of good relationships: spouses, friends, family and colleagues. Although the type of relationship might differ, the characteristics necessary for a healthy relationship are generally the same. Here are some of those characteristics and why they are important.

Love

Love is the ingredient that makes everything else a little better. When you love someone, you want what is in the best interest of that person. You are willing to guide and help the one you love to accomplish those goals. Respect

Respect is as important as love. You always want to lift up your loved ones and make them feel supported. Let them know they are admired by you and that you recognize their gifts. Listening is part of respect. Hear your loved ones fully. Tell others how blessed you are to have them in your life. Do not tear others down, especially in front of other people. Humor

A good sense of humor is important in any relationship because things are not always going to go perfectly, and humor can diffuse many situations. Transparency

Being honest about certain things can also diffuse issues. Our loved ones can poke at us sometimes for whatever reason. If you acknowledge your shortcomings, it takes away the ammunition from the person trying to get a reaction from you. Transparency can also lead to trust. Solidarity

United we stand. It is an amazing feeling to know you and a loved one are a united front. Knowing you have support relieves a lot of stress. There is nothing uglier than watching someone criticize someone in public. Agree to build each other up instead of tearing one another down. Understanding

None of us are perfect, so we need to understand and give grace to each other when we are struggling. Differences make us more interesting, and we don’t need to fit specific labels. Be your true self, and if someone doesn’t love you the way you are then move on. Communication

Talk to the people you love or work with, and clearly communicate your thoughts and feelings. Fully listen to them, as well.

These basic elements will help build a strong relationship, but there are times when the best thing you can do is walk away. If someone tears you down, makes you feel inadequate, is an emotional or physical bully, or tries to control you, it is time to realize the relationship is toxic, and the best thing you can do is end it. Instead of rescuing the relationship, rescue yourself.

Jennifer Bonn is a freelance writer in Kennesaw and a recently retired 40-year educator. Her book, “101 Tips to Lighten Your Burden,” was recently released and is available on Amazon.

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