Voice Magazines - Alfreton & Villages Edition - May 2023

Dear Readers,

Here we are in May, the month of all the Bank Holidays! Did I mention it is my most favourite month?! And as a super bonus, we’ve got an extra one for the Coronation. Whether you are a Royalist or not, as a working person, I am more than happy with that, especially since I’ve had a super busy month, so the bank holidays are always good to catch up with the ‘adulting’ chores for me.

Speaking of the Coronation – what do you think to our Coronation special? Our very talented designer Lisa has spent a good deal of time on the last few months to create the front cover but I hope you agree, it looks pretty spectacular. We’ve also got some other lovely articles relating to the Coronation, The King and all things Royalty (including another wonderful humorous verse via Mike’s Musing – this is your last call to purchase Julie’s poems via Mike’s page and help raise some much-needed funds for a wonderful charity). I hope you enjoy it as much as we’ve enjoyed creating the mags this month & we hope that it lands in your collection of keepsakes that can be referred to in years to come.

Also, because we weren’t busy enough (hence the need for some additional sales support), Our Matlock magazine has launched!! We had some lovely discussions with the advertisers, so we’re hopeful that it will be as well received in the community as all our other editions.

In other news, our rescue dog Flake has been in for a small lump removal this month, on his ear. The bandages make him look like a cosmonaut from the

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1960’s (see pic!), which is very funny. For anyone that has endured the ‘cone of shame’ on their beloved furry friends, you will feel my pain as he charges into every piece of furniture at full pelt and walks around the house in the middle of the night, boshing into everything – please send fast healing well wishes and all the coffee if you see me! I’m considering a ‘Gofundme’ page for the coffee actually, as it is now a luxury item in our house due to the daylight robbery that occurred when picking up the bill! It’s a good job we love our boys!

Anyways, I’m off to walk past some coffee shops for the smells!

See you next month,

Long Live the King!

The coronation on May 6th in Westminster Abbey will make Charles the 62nd monarch in the last 1,200 years to serve these isles. At the age of 73 he will be the oldest ascendant to the throne. Born in 1948, Charles became heir apparent at the tender age of three when his late mother, Queen Elizabeth II ascended to the throne in 1952.

It could of course all have been very different. Had Charles’ great uncle, Edward VIII not abdicated in December 1936 the line of succession would not have passed to Charles’s grandfather, and thus to his daughter Elizabeth and ultimately to Charles.

Charles was the first heir apparent to attend school instead of being home tutored. He was also the first heir to the British crown to earn a bachelor’s degree. He studied archaeology, anthropology and, history at Trinity College, Cambridge.

I can’t help but wonder how different Charles’s life would have been without the yoke of the monarchy around him. He seems a rather gentle man, maybe not the most intellectual of people, but one who cares deeply about nature. Perhaps he would have been happier pottering on a country estate somewhere, instead of tending to the affairs of state.

We have such a long and rich history in the UK, but even so, it may be hard to comprehend that the first king of a, more or less, unified England was Æthelstan in 927! His territory covered most of what we now define as England, but not Scotland, Wales, or Northern Ireland. It wasn’t until 1603 when King James VI of Scotland ascended the throne as King James I that a single monarch reigned in the United Kingdom.

Staying with the history of the monarchy, who knew that William the Conqueror was the first king to be crowned in Westminster Abbey? Well, at least his was the first documented coronation to take place there.

Until relatively modern times, and in particular since the advent of televised ceremonies, the average person would have no knowledge of the proceedings at a coronation. A process that has remained pretty much unchanged since the late 14th century. Since that time, every coronation ceremony has basically followed the same order of service laid down in the Abbey’s magnificent medieval illuminated Latin manuscript, the Liber Regalis.

The coronation of King Charles III will presumably stick with this age old tradition - but unlike our ancestors we will be able to watch live coverage of the proceedings. I know I will be watching - will you?

Whether you are planning a “watch party” with friends and family, hosting a street party, or a village green gathering…be aware of the history unfolding in front of you - 1,200 years of tradition in “these sceptred isles”.

For anyone born after 1953, King Charles’s III coronation in May will be the first in their lifetime - without sounding maudlin, I suspect that for a lot of younger people it won’t be the last.

These articles are researched and written by Laura Billingham, a local content writer and author. Laura moved to the Peak District several years ago to pursue her passion for writing.

ALFRETON & DISTRICT HERITAGE TRUST ALFRETON HERITAGE CENTRE 30 YEARS ON

Alfreton Heritage Centre is located in Alfreton Cemetery on Rodgers Lane, Alfreton and is housed in the old Cemetery Chapel which was built by the Alfreton Burial Board in 1891. The Chapel is substantially in its original form and houses a large collection of artifacts together with local photographs and documents, all of which are available to view.

The centre is managed by Alfreton and District Heritage Trust and was opened in 1993 although the Trust had been formed several years earlier and involved Rotary and Round Table groups along with local Freemasons and individuals all of whom contributed financially to its formation as did Amber Valley Borough Council who continue to do so. Their support continues to be appreciated and to the officers of the Council I personally deal with may I, on behalf of everyone at the Heritage Centre, say a public thank you for all your help.

The Centre is open from 2pm until 4pm every Sunday and we’re also open on most Wednesdays from 10am until 1.30pm (Check our Facebook Page to make sure we’re open) Our Volunteers are always willing to help our visitors and dropping in is likely to be an unforgettable experience! History is fun and we try to always make it so as our regular request for visits from local schools testify.

We work closely with our sister history societies locally, which in itself is most rewarding and also we host group visits as well as giving talks to other organisations. It keeps us busy but we always need more help.

If you fancy joining us pop in and have a natter. There will always be a Jaffa Cake and a cuppa as a reward. This will come as no surprise to those of you who follow us on Facebook as the Heritage Centre has become inextricably linked with them and indeed has produced a booklet on the history of the Jaffa Cake along with having a huge collection of them, acknowledged to be of National Significance!

The 3rd July is the 30th Anniversary of the opening of the Heritage Centre but as this falls on a Monday we will have an extended opening on Sunday, 2nd July, 2023 when we will open from 10am until 4pm. Jaffa cake treats will be the theme so if your children or grandchildren like baking get them busy. There may even be a prize! We look forward to seeing you there.

Hugh McKenzie & Amber Valley Mayor Charles Cutting Opening the centre in 1993

Interior today

Centre around 1900

Centre today

TIBSHELF & DISTRICT COMMUNITY FIRST RESPONDERS

WOULD YOU LIKE TO GIVE BACK SOMETHING TO YOUR COMMUNITY?

We cover Tibshelf, plus the surrounding areas, ie: Morton, Stonebroom, Shirland, Pilsley, Clay Cross, Shirland, Higham, Newton, Westhouses, Alfreton, South Normanton, and many more.

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COULD YOU BE A CFR?

• Are you up for a challenge?

• Would you like to help people in your community?

• Can you give up 16hrs a month?

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• Do you hold a full, clean driving license?

• Are you in reasonable good health?

If you answered ‘YES’ to these questions then you are just the sort of person we are looking for and you could make a real difference to YOUR Community.

Food & Retail

OPENING TIMES

Tue-Fri 9.30am - 2.00pm Sat 9.30am - 2.30pm

Alfreton’s only wool shop, for all your knitting and crocheting essentials at less than RRP.

54a King Street, Alfreton Inbetween (and behind sanam and signature hairdressers)

T: 01773 833717

Slimming World Recipe

Teriyaki Salmon

Method

1. Preheat your oven to 200°C/fan 180°C/gas 6.

2. Separate the white and green parts of the spring onion, then roughly chop the white parts and put in a bowl. Add the garlic, lemon juice, Marmite, soy sauce, chilli powder and 90ml boiling water and blitz until smooth using a stick blender or liquidiser.

For more information visit www.slimmingworld.co.uk

TUESDAY MORNING 9.30am

SOMERCOTES VILLAGE HALL Nottingham Rd, Somercotes, DE55 4HQ

WEDNESDAY EVENING 6pm

CHRIST THE KING CHURCH HALL Nottingham Rd, Alfreton, DE55 7GL

WEDNESDAY MORNING 9am & 10.30am

PALMER MOREWOOD MEMORIAL CLUB 36 Hall St, Alfreton, DE55 7BU

Tel : Sue: 07738 118 130

THURSDAY EVENING 5.30pm

ALFRETON & DISTRICT MEMORIAL HALL Grange Street, Alfreton, DE55 7JA

Tel : Ben: 07951 157 551

slimmingworld.co.uk

#YesYouCanWithSlimmingWorldslimmingworld.co.uk

#YesYouCanWithSlimmingWorld

This is one of my favourite dishes. Salmon and teriyaki is just an amazing combination. I love it with noodles and pak choi but it goes great with rice and other tasty green veg such as tenderstem broccoli.

3. Arrange the salmon fillets in an ovenproof dish, then finely slice the green parts of the spring onions and scatter over the fish. Pour the sauce over each fillet. Bake for 15 minutes or until the salmon is cooked and the sauce has thickened slightly.

4. Serve hot with vegetables and rice or noodles.

Serves: 4 Ready in: 25 mins

Ingredients:

• Small bunch of spring onions

• 2 garlic cloves, peeled

• 1 tbsp lemon juice

• ½ tsp Marmite

• 4 tbsp dark soy sauce

• ½ tsp chilli powder

• 4 large skinless and boneless salmon fillets

Syns per serving: FREE

THE LITTLE RED HEN HOUSE NORTHUMBERLAND

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MANDY’S TRAVEL PAGE

Hi I’m Mandy your Personal Travel Counsellor. Lake Como, St Moritz & Bernina Express

As the Sun has finally started shining a little bit more, it can’t just be me that is dreaming of hot days and adventures?! In which case, this one fits the bill for me, does it for you as well?

Savour lakes and mountains and take one of the world’s great railway journeys to Switzerland’s most celebrated holiday hideaway.

Spend a week on the shores of Lake Como, the most picturesque of the Italian lakes. Enjoy its elegant villas and glorious gardens – which have inspired artists and writers for generations – and combine rest and relaxation with some wonderful excursions, including a journey on the spectacularly scenic Bernina Express to chic St Moritz, famous refuge of the well-heeled, and opportunities to discover stylish Milan and idyllic Lugano.

Departures available on selected dates in September and October 2023 from £1069.00 per person (based on 2 people sharing)

WHAT DOES THIS PRICE INCLUDE?

• Seven nights’ carefully chosen dinner, bed and breakfast accommodation at the three-star Hotel Lario, Mezzegra

• Two boat trips on Lake Como

• A ride on the Bernina Express

• Entrance to the gardens of Villa del Balbianello

• Return flights to Milan from Manchester

• Comfortable coach travel and transfers throughout

• Fully escorted by a friendly, experienced tour manager, with specialist local guides where applicable

MANDY OLDKNOW T: 01773 318 540

mandy.oldknow@travelcounsellors.com www.travelcounsellors.co.uk/mandy.oldknow

COACH TOUR HOLIDAYS

CARDIFF

POTTERS RESORT – NORFOLK

NORTHERN IRELAND - BELFAST

25 Interesting Facts About King Charles III

1. King Charles III was born at Buckingham Palace on November 14, 1948,

2. He may be the last ruler of England not to be born in a hospital.

3. His full name is Charles Philip Arthur George.

4. He was christened in the Music Room at Buckingham Palace on December 15, 1948.

5. He is a descendant of both Queen Victoria and King James VI of Scotland

6. Charles became heir apparent to the throne at just three years old.

7. He ascended to the throne on September 8, 2022, following the death of his mother and was the longest-serving heir apparent in British history, a position which he held for 70 years.

8. At the age of 73, Charles is also the oldest person to assume the British throne.

15. Charles is a staunch environmentalist and recently took on a role previously held by his father Prince Philip and is now the ranger of Windsor Great Park, one of England’s oldest landed estates.

16. Charles is also a licensed pilot and has flown various aircraft throughout his life.

17. He is a published author and has written several books on topics such as architecture, history, the environment and even a children’s book.

18. He is a patron of numerous charities and organizations, including the British Red Cross, the Prince’s Trust, and the National Trust.

19. He is a member of numerous royal orders and societies, including the Order of the Garter and the Royal Society.

20. Charles is a keen polo player and has played for various teams throughout his life.

9. Charles was the first royal heir apparent to be educated outside of the palace. The young prince first attended Hill House School in London before attending Cheam Preparatory School in Hampshire, and then subsequently Gordonstoun in Scotland. Both of the latter were also schools that his father Prince Philip had attended.

10. He graduated from Trinity College, Cambridge, with a Bachelor of Arts in 1970.

11. In 1969, was made the Prince of Wales and Earl of Chester by his mother, the Queen.

12. Charles broke royal precedent by being present at the births of his two children.

13. Diana and Charles reportedly disagreed on what their first son should be named. Charles originally wanted William to be named Arthur.

14. He is a passionate supporter of traditional architecture and has been vocal in his opposition to modernist architecture.

21. He is a fan of classical music and has attended many operas and concerts throughout his life.

22. He is a collector of art, including paintings, sculptures, and other works of art.

23. Charles could be considered one of the UK’s most successful living artists. Like his great-great-great-grandmother Queen Victoria, the former Prince of Wales is an avid artist. He prefers watercolours and paints scenes of natural beauty, like mountains and lakes. Though he describes himself as an “enthusiastic amateur,” he is an honorary member of the Royal Academy and the Royal Watercolour Society, and his paintings have sold for more than $2 million.

24. Charles speaks several languages, including French and German.

25. He has visited over 130 countries during his official travels and is well-travelled around the world.

SWIMMING CLUB

ONE HOUR MEGA SWIM

The Belper Marlin Swimming Club One Hour Mega Swim, a fundraising event returned this year with a new cause: supporting the Laura Centre, a Midlandsbased charity that offers free bereavement support to parents who have lost a child and children who have lost a parent or significant person in their lives. The event took place on March 26th, 2023, at Belper Leisure Centre.

The Laura Centre provides holistic bereavement support, including bereavement counselling, in a family-oriented, approachable, and welcoming environment. They respect the uniqueness of each individual’s experience of bereavement and consider the spiritual, cultural, and emotional aspects of grief.

Belper Marlin SC One Hour Mega Swim has previously raised funds for various charities, and this year, participants were encouraged to set up individual sponsorship pages to raise funds for the Laura Centre.

The swim was divided into different time slots for different age groups, with Mini Marlins also invited to participate and gain Rainbow distance awards. One participant, Oliver Henshaw, swam an impressive 184 lengths in a 25-meter pool within the hour-long event, showcasing his swimming prowess and dedication to supporting the cause of the Laura Centre.

Belper Marlin SC One Hour Mega Swim for the Laura Centre was a resounding success, raising a total of £6,639. Gail, co-founder of the Laura Centre, personally expressed her gratitude to all the swimmers for their incredible efforts. The Laura

Centre was founded by Gail and her husband 35 years ago after the loss of their 5-year-old daughter Laura to leukemia, which highlighted the lack of support available for grieving parents and siblings. The funds raised will directly support the Laura Centre’s mission of helping families come to terms with their loss.

The generosity and hard work of Team Marlin and all the participants in raising the significant amount for the Laura Centre are overwhelming and greatly appreciated. The Laura Centre continues to provide invaluable support to countless families, and the success of the Marlins One Hour Mega Swim is a shining example of how individuals can make a meaningful difference in their communities by dedicating their efforts to a worthy cause.

If you are interested, please go to our website www.belpermarlin.co.uk and click “Join Us” or email us on

Vintage Rambles with rafaand Flake

This month we head to the area around Hardwick Hall. The countryside around the hall is beautiful and varied. This time of the year there is often lambs, so if you take your dogs, please take extra care.

6 MILE CIRCULAR WALK FROM HARDWICK INN AND AROUND HARDWICK HALL

A fairly easy walk for you and your dog which is relatively flat but has a few short stretches on country roads. The route should take around 2.5-3 hours. The terrain can be a little uneven so as usual a good pair of boots will help. And as Ever Follow the Countryside code!

1. Keeping Hardwick Inn on your right, cross the cattle grid and walk up the road into Hardwick Park. Stay with the road until it bends sharply left. At this point, go straight ahead to pass through a gate and into a field.

2. Follow the well-trodden path across the field to pass through another gate. You will begin to enter woodland. Follow the path up hill to a T-junction and turn right. Follow the path ahead and then down into a dip and up the other side. At the very end of the woodland, pass through a gate and onto a lane.

3. Follow the lane straight ahead passing a cottage on the left. Further on you will reach ‘Norwood Barn’ on the left. Here take the sign posted footpath through the large wooden gate to the left. The path will take you between the buildings, through a gap in a stone wall and on into an open field.

4. Go straight across the field and into a wooded area. Head down hill, cross a small footbridge and into another open field. Follow the path for a short distance and then into a small wooded area. Just inside the trees you will cross ‘Rowthorne Trail’. Take the path straight ahead signposted for ‘Rowthorne Village’.

5. Continue straight, passing through 3 hedgerows and eventually onto a road. Turn left along the road to reach a T-Junction and then turn right into Rowthorne Village.

6. Continue along the road until you see a footpath to the left signposted for ‘Ault Hucknall’. Take the path through a wooden gate and after a short distance through a metal gate into a field. Go straight ahead and then turn towards the bottom right hand corner of this field to pass through another metal gate. Keeping the hedgerow on your right, cross this field to pass through a wooden gate and onto a road.

7. Cross the road diagonal left and then go through a wooden gate into a field. Cross the field, then through a hedgerow into another field and eventually through a wooden gate onto a road.

8. Turn left on the road to pass Ault Hucknall Church on your right. Just past the church take the bridle path on your left signposted for ‘Hardwick Park’.

9. Continue straight along the bridle path passing a signpost reading ‘residents vehicles only’ and then onto a blue wooden gate. Pass through the gate and in a short distance where the bridle path bears right, go straight down to a road.

10. At the road turn left, cross the cattle grid and turn immediately right and head down hill, keeping a fence on your right. After a short distance turn right through a wooden gate. Follow the path passing four ponds on your left before turning left to pass between two ponds, heading for a kissing gate.

11. Pass through the gate and keep ahead across an open area to then pass by a wooded area with a metal fence. Keep the fence on your right and continue until you have reached the Hardwick Inn.

This walk is for illustrative purposes only. Voice Magazines Ltd takes no responsibility for anyone who chooses to follow this route and encourages all walkers to obey all byelaws and signs and to respect the area they are walking in, ensuring they pick up all dog mess and obey the countryside code at all times.

COMPETITION TIME WIN A PAIR OF WEEKEND PEAK CLUB VIP TICKETS

28th - 30th 2023 - Pikehall, Derbyshire

Peak Club VIP ticket holders benefit from all these added perks:

• Spacious Campsite,

• Nice Toilets & Showers

• Exclusive VIP Bar

• Pamper Tent with power for your use

• VIP Queuing Lane

Answer the following question to enter: In which Derbyshire town is Pikehall situated?

All answers are to be sent via email to community@voicemagazines.co.uk. Please ensure you give your full name, address and telephone number so all winners can be notified. Closing Date - 20th June 2023

16 LANE TENPIN BOWLING CENTRE WITH A LICENSED BAR, SNACK BAR, AMERICAN POOL TABLES AND ARCADE GAMES AREA.

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FREE AMPLE ON SITE CAR PARKING SITUATED JUST OUT OF THE TOWN CENTRE

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Book Review

There’s been an outpouring of affection following Paul O’Grady’s death. He was of course best known for his “blonde bombsite” Lily Savage character, his numerous TV shows and for his championing of dogs, especially rescue dogs. But Paul also wrote books.

Most of them have been autobiographical – there’s four in that series, and a great place to start is at the beginning – taking us up to age 18, and titled At My Mother’s Kneeand other low joints.

Paul wrote as he talked, very funny, warm, dry and very human. The characters in his life are people you feel you know – his ear for the way people talk is magic. He said that a lot of Lily was based on the women he encountered, particularly in his childhood and you can see that from his tales about his Aunty Chrissie, aka The Pride of Birkenhead Buses (she was a bus conductress) and from his descriptions of the slanging matches in the local shop.

We get to see Paul as altar boy, boxer, barman, civil servant and club goer on the Liverpool scene. Its brilliant stuff and some parts are so funny you might well end up crying with laughter. A great way to remember a lovely bloke.

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RASCALS RACE TO SUCCESS

RASCALS squad swimmers have had an excellent start to the calendar year with many incredible performances, lots of personal best times (PBs), plenty of Regional Times achieved and a League Series Win!

During the first couple of weekends of February, swimmers competed in the Annual Derbyshire County Championships, held at the new Moorways 50m pool in Derby for the first time, across a full Olympic style programme of events. The club had a massive 51 swimmers qualify for the event, an increase of nearly 15% on the previous year. In total the club had 42 finalists, 67 top six finishes and a huge 31 medals won. Beyond those making finals, each and every swimmer came away with fantastic results with multiple swimmers achieving PBs and over 20 swimmers setting Regional consideration times!

The squad swimmers have also been busy competing in the Derwent District Swim Series too, which is a 3 round league based competition swum across January, February and March, where all swimmers compete representing the club in both individual and relay events. The RASCALS swimmers led from the outset of round 1, winning the gala by 10 points from Dronfield Dolphins and in the second round, although it was slightly closer, Ripley won again, this time by a margin of 9 points to Belper Marlin. These two wins meant that we led the table by 26 points going into the final round.

The final saw much stiffer opposition, with Ripley having a massive tussle with Belper for overall glory throughout the entirety of the gala. And unsurprisingly it all came down to the final race with Ripley having a very slender 4 point advantage…. but by coming 2nd in the exciting cannon relay at the end of the gala the swimmers had done enough to become overall Series Champions for the first time since 2020! A magnificent achievement for a fantastic bunch of swimmers! The club’s attention now turns to the Regional Championships across April and May and our popular summer open meet at Alfreton LC in July, where we anticipate further excellent performances and PBs!

If you would like to expand your swimming activities or try something new, please contact us. contact@ripleyrascals.org.uk | www.ripleyrascals.org.uk

RASCALS squad for the Derbyshire County Championships

Some of RASCALS squad at the Derwent District Swim Series final

All Around the Shire

One of the most popular reminiscence sessions my husband and I perform to people in residential homes and other social groups is called “Happy and Glorious”. We developed it for the late Queen’s platinum jubilee and it has evolved to now become a celebration of King Charles’ coronation. We have collected a number of items of royal memorabilia: mugs, medallions, books, plates, biscuit tins and coins. Perhaps you have some too. In this coronation year, schoolchildren will probably be receiving commemorative items by which to remember this historic event. They may keep and treasure them for many years. It never ceases to amaze me how many of the people we come across met the Queen during her reign and what a powerful impact that short meeting of perhaps a couple of words had on them as they recount the stories many years later. Whether they met at a garden party, during a factory

or town tour or have been presented and decorated by her, the meeting remains a significant milestone in their lives.

I wonder what memories our schoolchildren will have of this event when they are 80, 90 or 100 years old. They may still treasure the coronation souvenir they receive. They may have met King Charles during their lifetime and remember that encounter.

Whatever the Coronation has for you, I wish for long and happy memories for you, your family and your friends to share for many years to come.

GOD SAVE THE KING!

Guess the words and Fill in the crossword ! Pitcherwits®

Pitcherwits® are crossword puzzles where some of the clues are in pictures. Sound easy? It’s not called “Pit-your-wits” for nothing! The mixture of cryptic and picture clues, combined with Professor Rebus’ unique sense of humour, will keep you entertained for hours.

Across

9 Give out over time (4)

10 Use of shirt splattered with cooking fat (4)

11 Confused by a teas-made! (2,3)

12 False god said to be inactive (4)

14 Said to be smart but he’s also a lace maker (4)

Down

3 Moose (from Selkirk) (3)

4 Look in Cheyenne territory (3)

6 Miscue a trial of radioactive stuff (7)

7 Is one sounding a bit sheepish, lady? (3)

13 Have a breakdown finally (3)

16 It’s mandatory to have a plus! (3)

17 May a peace surround terrier talk (3)

CORONATION WORDSEARCH

Firstly, find all the words listed below in the grid. They can be found vertically, horizontally, forwards, backwards or diagonally. (Letters can be used more than once and words may overlap).

Once you have found all of the words listed, the 9 remaining letters will spell another word.

Mike’sMusings

Mike has kindly stepped aside to allow for a special coronation creation of rhyming verse, or a poem to you and me Enjoy!

Mike is always glad to hear from you at : mike.musings@outlook.com

A Chaotic Coronation?

You’ll recall – providing you’ve been paying attention of course – the poems that Julie Sheldon kindly allowed me to reproduce, in January & February. Well, I’ve cheekily ‘commissioned’ her, requesting something amusing and topical to commemorate what, for many, will be the first British regal coronation of our collective lifetimes. I think she’s surpassed herself. What do you think?

A corgi threw up on the doorstep…

The King was then totally blinded

The King didn’t see and he slipped

He’d barely got out of the palace

But thought he had fractured his hip

Camilla’s hand reached out to help him

But she lost her balance and fell

The morning of their coronation

Had really not started too well

They set off for Westminster Abbey

The carriage looked fit for a king

But suddenly they were lopsided Because of an old rusty spring

They struggled to keep their composure

Whilst feeling a right pair of fools

For everything had become shaken

Including the King’s own Crown Jewels

From thereon, the plans did run smoothly

Until it was time for the crown

When put into place by the bishop

It started to slowly slide down

He’d dreaded this moment for years

The crown was now wedged in position

And couldn’t be prised from his ears

The Abbey was in a commotion

Whatever were they going to do?

There really was just one solution… A call to the local fire crew

A firefighter came to the rescue

By bringing a bucket of grease…

He smeared it around the King’s temples Which offered a slimy release

At last, they were back at the palace

They went out to wave to the throng

A face like a chip, and bones aching They didn’t stay out there for long

The King then did suddenly waken… He managed to stifle a scream…

At last came the realisation

That it all had been just a bad dream!

Of course, this is only a poem… A snippet of light-hearted fun

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So here’s to King Charles and Camilla I wish them the best from now on!

If you’d like to have your own copies of Julie’s poetic gems – they’d make a wonderful gift – her self-published (at her own expense) trilogy of titles viz. Lockdown Lyrics, Rocky Road Rhymes and Pandemic Pondering remain available with proceeds going to The Brain Tumour Charity.

A bargain at £5 each (or £12 for all three), you can secure your own by contacting Julie directly via email at juliesheldon50@gmail.com or by phoning 07890 989868. She’ll be delighted to hear from you. Alternatively, you can contact me, as always, via mike.musings@outlook.com

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Time to enjoy the ancient woods

Springtime brings new life to the countryside after the long winter chill and so this is a wonderful season to enjoy the woods, and especially the ancient woodlands of the Peak District and nearby areas. These landscapes, so rich in wildlife species are good all year round, but particularly in spring. The tree canopies echo with songs and territorial claims of great tits, blue tits, and the warblers, chiffchaff, and blackcap. The blackbirds, robins, and tawny owls are well ahead, and many have already nested. In woods with ancient beeches and parks such as Chatsworth or Haddon for instance, the songs and calls of nuthatches ring out. Nearby, expect to hear the high pitched territorial calls of great spotted woodpeckers or else their drumming from the treetops. Leaf-burst changes the atmosphere of the woodland as bright green leaves suddenly brighten the canopy. If all goes well, and with climate change you just don’t know, the myriad insects (particularly caterpillars) that will feed on these leaves in May and June, provide essential food for the baby birds in the nest and then once again when they fledge.

From April through into May, the hazel catkins have died away but are replaced by other tree flowers such as the ubiquitous pussy willows, and not so far behind, the erect white flowers of bird cherry. This is one of our rarer tree species and more common in upland and western zones, but also one of the more striking flowering trees in our ancient woods. Indeed,

many tree flowers are hardly noticed perhaps because they are small and often, they are hidden high in the tree canopy. Some like birch catkins make their presence felt through hay fever! However, tree flowers can be especially important for pollinating insects such as honeybees, and the seeds produced in autumn and winter support birds such as siskins, lesser redpolls, and many others. Birch and alder are especially important along woodland edges in the former case and especially riversides in the latter.

The woods in springtime are also good for many butterfly species as they emerge from hibernation or from pupae and seek the warmth of sheltered, sunny glades. Small tortoiseshells, peacocks, and commas are amongst the first species to appear. They are soon joined by speckled woods, orangetips, green-veined whites, and holly blues. Males display against each other to establish territories and then, hopefully, to attract suitable females. The females once mated will seek out the right foodplants for their larvae and on which to lay their eggs.

In nearby gardens, these butterflies will explore these human landscapes as merely clearings in the wood, the treescape. They come in search of rides and glades and their flowers and sunlight. Plants such as the garden honesty or dame’s violet in a garden border will prove irresistible attractions for some species like the pretty orange-tips. Similarly, in a damp lawn, pond edge, marsh or meadow, cuckoo flower is an excellent flower to grow. Spring bulbs and early flowering shrubs all help support wildlife under pressure and your garden makes a difference.

Professor Ian D. Rotherham, researcher, writer, broadcaster on wildlife and environmental issues in the Peak District and elsewhere, is contactable on info@hallamec.plus.com. Follow his

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Gardener’s Calendar

Most spring bulbs will have gone over by now, but a good way to encourage them to return next year is to give them some tomato feed now.

Some species of tulips are unlikely to flower year on year, but others will, so be sure to deadhead them and even if they look messy, don’t cut back the leaves until they have died.

Don’t Mow May has become quite a thing – the aim being to leave your grass to grow so wildflowers come through and help pollinators such as bees. But if you find it a hard rule to stick to, you’ll still get daisies and clover surviving and leave your grass looking pretty tidy if you raise the height of the cutters on your mower. You can always lower them again later.

Top Tip:

There are lots of small starter tomato plants in nurseries and they are a great way of growing your own. Just remember that they don’t like sitting in loads of compost and if you try to transplant straight in large containers they may well rot. This is why you can put them in grow bags rather than proper pots - they like their roots crowded. So just keep potting on to the next size until they look well grown.

Weeds are growing like there’s no tomorrow. Pick a dry day to hoe. Drag the hoe through thoroughly and leave them on the surface to dry out and die – saves the bother of hand removing every one with a trowel.