Voice Magazines - Selston, Pinxton, Jacksdale & Westwood Edition - August 2023

12 EDITIONS READ BY OVER

162,000 RESIDENTS

10TH AUGUST 1675

King Charles II lays the foundation stone of the Royal Observatory in Greenwich.

SELSTON • PINXTON • JACKSDALE • WESTWOOD

Blundstone #587 Rustic Black

Blundstone #585 Rustic Brown

From the Editor

Dear Readers,

So now I’m just starting to think I’m a little bit psychic about the weather (or I’m Storm from X-Men) as last month I said, and I quote; “I just pray for rain”. If ever there was a lesson in being careful regarding what you wish for!! At the time of writing, we are a week away from the Y Not festival and as such, I am whole heartedly, categorically NOT praying for rain. I am a fair weathered camper/ festival go-er and as such, some nice warming sunshine has been requested.

Although one thing I am grateful for regarding the copious amounts of rain – the blasted midgies have gone to ground again! I had a bit of a nasty bite from one of them – obvs left it for a while (like 10days or so, probs shouldn’t have) until needing a killer dose of antibiotics. I wasn’t too worried until the Nurse Practitioner looked at it and went “Oooh, yep, antibiotics and if you don’t see significant improvement in the next 48hrs, get yourself down to A&E”. I said – “OK, what for?” (somewhat naively) and she said, “because you will need antibiotics intravenously by then if the tablets aren’t working”. No panic then #eyeroll. Anyway, a bit of googling and several panic attacks later, it’s all good thankfully.

Another month, another World Cup – Nope not the Football, this time it’s Netballs turn

and it is showing on the Beeb! As an avid fan and (fairweather) player, that’s me sorted for entertainment!

Speaking of entertainment, whilst most people were choosing between Barbie and Oppenheimer this month #Barbenheimer, we ended up at Elemental courtesy of our eldest Niece’s birthday. I can’t say I identified with the story of a fiery tempered young woman but I am now tempted to change my purple hair to red!

Workwise, we’ve created a lovely high street feature in the Matlock & Darley Dale magazines. Honestly, it is such a glorious place to go to and the high street is so beautiful with lots of varied shops – they deserve lots of support to keep them thriving. Our next features are scheduled for Christmas……sorry to mention it but it is coming around quickly!! That is assuming we can get some people to fill our Sales Vacancies – why wouldn’t you want to work here if you have experience in business-tobusiness sales?!

Happy Reading

WHAT HAPPENS IN AUGUST?

August is traditionally holiday time here in the UK, schools are closed, the weather is (hopefully) behaving itself, and Autumn still seems a while away, but what else is the month known for?

Here are a few fun (and not so fun) facts I discovered:

➤ August 1st is Lammas Day; this marked the start of the harvest season during the Anglo Saxon period. The name derives from an Anglo Saxon word - hlāfmæsse - meaning “loaf mass”. Bread was made from the first wheat harvest and blessed before being broken (not cut) into four pieces and buried in each corner of a barn that would be used to store the full harvest. Another loaf would be shared amongst loved ones. Both rituals were thought to protect the upcoming harvest.

➤ In the Roman calendar, August was first known as “Sextilis” - the Latin word for six - as until around 700 BC only ten months were counted. When an extra two months were added, Sextilis was bumped to the eighth month. The name August was not adopted until 8 BC, when it was renamed in honour of Emperor Augustus.

➤ In a non-leap year, August will not share its starting day with any other month. Of course I had to check! This year August 1st will fall on a Tuesday; of the other eleven months of the year, three start on a Wednesday, two on a Sunday, two on a Saturday, two on a Friday, one on a Thursday and one on a Monday. So it appears to be true - but as two other months this year also fall into this solo category, I’m not sure it is such a startling fact.

➤ The Earl of Sandwich “invented” the first sarnie in August 1762 and picnics have never been the same since. To be honest, I’ve always found this “fact” hard to believe - I mean, he couldn’t have been the first person in history to stick a bit of meat between two slices of bread.

➤ August is also the month of…Weeds! In the days of the Anglo-Saxons, August was known as “Weod Monath” or Weed Month, because it was when weeds and plants grew the fastest.

➤ August 26th, 1936, saw the BBC transmit its first high-definition television pictures.

➤ Martin Luther King delivered his famous “I have a dream speech”, August 28th, 1963.

➤ On August 24th, 79 AD, Mount Vesuvius erupted, destroying the cities of Pompeii and Herculaneum. One thousand eight hundred and sixty six years later, on August 6th, 1945, the US dropped atomic bombs on Nagasaki and Hiroshima.

➤ August 13th, 1964, Britain carried out the last two executions before capital punishment was abolished.

➤ August 16th, 1977, Elvis Presley packed up his blue suede shoes and left the world behind.

➤ Princess Diana died in a car accident in Paris on August 31st, 1997.

Whatever you do this August have fun and remember that we could have been stuck with a month named Sextilis - imagine the innuendos!

All Around the Shire

MEMORIES OF MY MOTHER’S DRESSING TABLE

Some of the recent items we have acquired for our reminiscence sessions are a box of Carmen heated rollers with pins and a vanity set for a dressing table (a long-handled mirror and brush set). This has started me thinking about what my own mum held dear.

Although she had no time to sit and preen at the dressing table, my mother always found a small space where she could lay out some special items. Her vanity set had been a gift to her on her 21st birthday, it included a hand-held mirror with a matching brush and comb.

She owned a wooden, shell-encrusted jewellery box containing her earrings: clip-ons or screw-back type were the fashion then. Her beads, necklaces and paste pearls were laid out on a tray, with the longer strings hooked onto the side of the mirror. The tray also held a variety of trinkumtranks like odd buttons, curtain hooks, pins, coins, dry-cleaning tickets, hairpins and hairnets.

A lidded glass pot contained scented talcum powder and a soft puff for dusting after a bath. She also always had a pot of

Pond’s vanishing cream at hand and was never seen without lipstick.

A bottle of Tweed perfume and Avon “Sweet Honesty” stood together with a small flask of 4711.

At the back of the table was a spray bottle of hair lacquer and, later, a set of Carmen heated rollers and a bonnet hairdryer.

Some items came and went as the years passed but the object she treasured most on her dressing table, was an aged photograph of her own mum and dad.

I do hope you have memories of a dressing table that belonged to someone special in your life.

THE LITTLE RED HEN HOUSE NORTHUMBERLAND

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Guess the words and Fill in the crossword ! Pitcherwits®

Pitcherwits® are crossword puzzles where some of the clues are in pictures. Sound easy? It’s not called “Pit-your-wits” for nothing! The mixture of cryptic and picture clues, combined with Professor Rebus’ unique sense of humour, will keep you entertained for hours.

Across

8 Link ID to URL in a glaringly vivid way (5)

9 Roast boar in five to make sure it’s well done! (5)

10 Secretory organ is the last in England (5)

12 Composer of velar form (5)

Down

2 The 30cm monarch? (5)

3 Dance the tango in Polynesia (5)

11 Bid farewell to aide, in turnaround (5)

1 Sip merchant’s brew to keep time, squaddy! (5,2,4)

5 Lion is a bit put out by attachment (7)

14 Ignore a difficult time? (4,3)

15 Kit destroyed after rum place for ‘apples and pears’ (5,6)

Down

1 Was dismissive about hog, filmed at odd angle (4,5,2)

4 Polly to fight with a difficult bit of sparkling (4,2,5)

6 Increased, and put on a pair, so to speak (5,2)

7 Brie is a dish for cold place (7)

13 Sweater pattern found in Ken’s CV (1-4) ANSWERS FOR LAST

This puzzles has been devised by the brilliant Professor Rebus. For more of his puzzles visit www.pitcherwits.co.uk

The Kia Electrified Event.

Top tips for first time student renters

If you can’t find a record of your deposit, then you are likely to be able to make a claim for up to 3x your rental deposit, and the claim amount increases each time your tenancy was renewed.

Legal Aid can help you fight eviction or disrepair

Choosing a letting agency vs private landlord

Before beginning your search for a property, you need to consider who you will rent through. Student letting agencies offer you additional security as they ensure your tenancy agreement, and the state of the property are legally fit to rent. But they can be a bit more expensive in the short term. There is nothing wrong with renting from a private landlord, but understand you’ll need to do a bit more legwork to ensure the tenancy agreement is legal and fair, and you’ll have to liaise with the landlord directly if there is ever a disrepair problem in the property. If you go down the private route, ask your university if they have a list of accredited landlords in the area. They will know best on which landlords to avoid.

Your deposit must be held in a scheme

Landlords are required by law to put your deposit into a secure government-backed scheme, so that it is safe and legally protected. This means they can’t simply put it in their own bank account. When you pay your deposit, they should be giving you a leaflet and the full details of which scheme your deposit has been placed in. At the end of your tenancy the landlord will notify the scheme, and the scheme can mediate any disputes if your landlord is threatening to withhold your deposit for unpaid rent, charges, or damage in the property.

There are only three schemes that they are legally allowed to put your deposit in. You can check for your deposit online by entering your name, postcode and tenancy start date.

• Tenancy Deposit Scheme: www.tenancydepositscheme.com

• My Deposits: www.mydeposits.co.uk

• The Deposit Protection Service: www.depositprotection.com

If your landlord is filing a possession claim or eviction, that would make you homeless, you can apply for Legal Aid to cover the cost of legal representation to help you fight it in court. There is a legal process they must follow; they cannot just change the locks without having gained approval from the court.

If the property has serious disrepairs such as mould, broken stairs, or pest infestation. You can also apply for Legal Aid if the disrepair in the property causes harm, or risk of harm, to the tenants.

Talk to your potential neighbours

The best research you can do before choosing a property, is to physically go see the property. Photos can be old or misleading, you can’t see exactly what the neighbourhood is like, and it gives you a great opportunity to knock on a door and ask someone, who actually lives there, what the landlord and neighbours are like. So don’t be afraid to knock on a door, you’d be surprised what useful information you will uncover by simply introducing yourself!

Resources you can trust

There are two great websites for student renters, that offer you a wealth of tips and checklists that will make this process easier for you.

• www.savethestudent.org

• www.ucas.com

And if you have problems, contact your local law firm with a Housing Law department and ask them for advice or help. Hopkins Solicitors is here for you, with offices in Mansfield, Sutton, Ashfield and Nottingham.

01623 782 789

info@hopkins-solicitors.co.uk

www.hopkins-solicitors.co.uk

Food & Retail

FRIDAY 9am & 10:30am

SELSTON PARISH HALL Mansfield Rd, Selston, NG16 6EE Sue: 07738 118 130

THURSDAY 5:30pm & 7pm

SELSTON PARISH HALL Mansfield Rd, Selston, NG16 6EE Maria: 07860 830 095

Slimming World Recipe

Diet Cola Chicken

Method:

1. Spray a large non-stick pan with low-calorie cooking spray and place over a high heat. Add the chicken, peppers and onion and stir-fry for 5-7 minutes, or until lightly browned.

2. Add the diet cola, stock, passata, tomato purée, garlic, Worcestershire sauce, soy sauce and herbs and stir well. Bring to

This is a true Slimming World Classic and for good reason. Packed full of flavour that will have you going back for more!

the boil, cover, reduce the heat to mediumlow and simmer for 12-15 minutes.

3. Add the sugar snap peas, stir and increase the heat to mediumhigh. Cook for another 10-15 minutes, or until the chicken is cooked through and the veg is tender.

For more information visit www.slimmingworld.co.uk

Ingredients:

• Low-calorie cooking spray

• 4 skinless and boneless chicken breasts, cut into bite-sized chunks

• 1 red, 1 yellow and 1 green pepper, cut into bite-sized chunks

• 1 onion, finely chopped

• 330ml can diet cola

• 200ml hot chicken stock

• 8 tbsp passata with onions and garlic

• 4 tbsp tomato purée

• 2 garlic cloves, finely chopped

• 2 tsp gluten-free Worcestershire sauce

• 1 tbsp dark soy sauce/tamari

• 1 tsp dried mixed herbs

• 200g sugar snap peas

Serves: 4 Ready in: 55 mins

Syns per serving: FREE

PINXTON & SOUTH NORMANTON: HISTORY GROUP

JOHN KING AND HIS PATENTED DETACHING HOOK

The year 1841 will ever be associated in the English mining industry. The year evidence was collected relating to the employment of children in the coal mining industry. It is, also significant for the introduction of the statutory reporting of all fatalities occurring in the industry.

It soon became apparent that although fatalities associated with shaft accidents were rare, when they did occur, multiple people were killed.

Unbelievably, because the job of operating the steam winding engine was not considered to be an arduous job, boys in their early teens were often employed to act as ‘winder’.

The revelation that many miners were being killed in shaft accidents resulted in a fresh look at the situation. One of the initiatives resulted in seeking a way of ensuring lives were not lost, if and when the cage was overwound and went over the headstocks.

Enter one John King, a resident of Pinxton. John was born in the Loscoe, Heanor area and initially worked as a mechanic in the hosiery industry; he was an inventor and invented a railway signalling system which brought him to Pinxton, a recognised railway centre.

He then set about obviating the tragic loss of life through coal mine shaft overwinds. He was not the only one. At least four others were also concentrating their efforts on the same task.

In the 1880’s The Institute of Mechanical Engineers tested each of the five devices in use. Of the five categories King was best in four and second best in the other.

The main criteria were ‘certainty to work’ and simplicity of operation (less risk of failure).

John King’s invention has never been bettered. Today it is in use in well over 50% of all the world’s deep mines. Today, the patent is owned by Bellambie Mining of South Africa.

Now comes a co-incidence which is so improbable, it is difficult to believe, but nevertheless, true. Several years ago, the author met the Chief Engineer of that company. He was born in Pinxton, in the Old Post Office which once stood on the exact spot on which the memorial to John King now stands.

The author of this article had the honour and privilege of officially unveiling the memorial. This article has been compiled by The Pinxton and South Normanton

The Society meets on the third Monday, monthly at The Post Mill Centre at 7pm. Visitors welcome.

Pinxton 1 & 6 shafts, where Kings Mine Cage Detatching Hook first used

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SUDOKU #37 Fill

Vintage Rambles with rafaand Flake

We have been saving this walk for a nice summers day and luckily for us we chanced upon one, not least because the heavens opened not long after we got back to the car!

Rafa has now fully retired from the rambles. At 14 years (98 in dog years!) it is just proving too much for him. So Flake has taken on full responsibilities. Rafa has been teaching him all the important stuff, like how to pose for a nice picture, which way up to hold the map and which pockets Mum keeps the treats in. So, we will need a new name for the walks... any suggestions gratefully received!

6 MILE CIRCULAR WALK FROM PLEASLEY CHURCH

A medium length walk which should take you and your dog around 3 hours to complete. There are a few short sections of road so please take care. Most of the walk is on paths and trails but please wear appropriate footwear and please follow the countryside code.

START: CHURCH OF ST. MICHAEL, CHURCH LA. PLEASLEY , MANSFIELD, NOTTS. NG19 7TD.

1. Standing on the road with your back to the church, turn right along the road to the very end. Then take the footpath on the right hand side of the road and follow it uphill and round to the left. Where the path splits take the right fork and pass beneath a pedestrian flyover.

2. Continue along the path beside a dual carriageway. After a short distance turn left onto a signposted footpath down some

steps. At the bottom of the steps turn right and then after a very short distance at a T junction of paths turn left.

3. Continue to pass through a metal width restrictor and then continue for some distance until reaching a path on your right. Turn right along the path going uphill with a stone wall on your right.

Don’t forget to mention Voice Magazines when responding to the Ads

4. At the top of the hill the path joins with another path. Continue straight to pass over a bridge, past a sign for ‘Mansfield’ on your left and after some distance past a footpath sign on your right. Continue straight and eventually pass underneath a stone arch bridge and then further on pass by a metal gate. After a short distance you will reach a road. Turn left along the road.

5. Continue along the road until reaching some houses on your left. At this point turn right along a single track road signposted for ‘St. Chad’s Church’. When you reach the church on your right continue straight ahead to cross over a metal stile onto a signposted footpath. Continue straight keeping a river over to your left.

6. After some distance you will reach a T junction with a lane. Turn right along the lane and after a short distance pass underneath a railway bridge. After this follow the lane around to the right and continue along the lane for some distance until passing through a metal gate onto a road.

7. Turn right along the road and after a short distance the road turns into a lane. Continue straight passing a ‘public bridleway’ signpost on your right and then further on pass a ‘public footpath’ signpost on your right.

8. Continue along the footpath and cross over a railway bridge. After cross over a stile and continue with a fence on your left. After crossing a 2nd stile continue until reaching a tarmac lane.

9. Continue straight along the tarmac lane until reaching a road. Cross straight over the road and continue along a single track road. Continue straight to the very end of the road and pass through a metal width restrictor onto a footpath.

10. Continue uphill with a hedge on both sides and then upon reaching a T junction of paths,

turn right to pass through a metal gate and cross an open field. At the far side of the field pass through a gap in the hedge to cross another open field. At the far side of this field upon reaching a lane, turn right along the lane and then immediately left to skirt along the edge of a field with a hedge on your left.

11. Continue to a large opening in the hedge on your left. At this point turn left to continue uphill along the edge of a field with a hedge on your right. At the top of the hill pass a yellow marker post on your left and continue to cross another field.

12. At the far side of this field pass a yellow marker post on your right, cross straight over a lane and continue downhill to cross another field.

13. At the far side of the field head into some trees and then down some steps onto a road. Turn right along the road to eventually pass back underneath the pedestrian flyover and follow the path around to the right back to the church.

This walk is for illustrative purposes only. Voice Magazines Ltd takes no responsibility for anyone who chooses to follow this route and encourages all walkers to obey all byelaws and signs and to respect the area they are walking in, ensuring they pick up all dog mess and obey the countryside code at all times.

To advertise please call Voice Team on 01773 549 035

MansfIeld Woodhouse St Chads ChurCH

PleasLey

From a Modest Garden Shed Enterprise to a Flourishing Established Venture:

Sliding Door Wardrobes’ Remarkable Journey

Today, we had the pleasure of meeting Ben Young, the proprietor of Sliding Door Wardrobes Ltd, at his impressive showroom in Nottingham. Sliding Door Wardrobes Ltd had humble beginnings in Ben’s parents’ garage in Kimberley, Nottingham, way back in 1996. At the outset, Ben’s mother, Jane, single-handedly managed the business. As time progressed and demand grew, the family made the decision to relocate to Bilborough, Nottingham, in 2001. Joining Jane in this thriving enterprise were Ben and his father, Peter, even though they were still operating out of a garden shed.

Following the unfortunate passing of his mother and his father’s retirement, Ben has taken the reins of the business. Taking it to new heights, he has brought the next generation on board, with his wife and daughter now actively involved in the company, along with the already established team, with over 40 years of combined experience at Sliding Door Wardrobes Ltd.

In 2004, recognizing the need for expansion, they took a pivotal step by opening a showroom just on the outskirts of Nottingham’s city centre. This new space provided a platform to showcase their bespoke, custom-built wardrobes. Their growth continued unabated, and in 2012, the showroom expanded further, offering an even greater area for customers to marvel at the beautiful wardrobes on display.

BRIDLINGTON BEACH FUN & EUROPEAN YOUTH CHAMPIONSHIPS

A glorious weekend in June saw thirty-two enthusiastic RASCALS Lifesavers back at Bridlington for the much-anticipated yearly beach training session. A departure from the usual single day of fun, the beach event has become so popular with our athletes that a full weekend of beach training was warranted. For a lot of our younger lifesavers, it was their first time at a beach training session, so the Saturday instruction and demonstration day was exactly what they needed. After the very important warm up, it was straight into beach flag elimination race training, lifebuoy launching and beach sprinting. With some time to lunch and lounge in the sun, it was into wet suits and straight into the warm waves. Safety with our younger lifesavers is paramount. Our coaches spent time before each activity explaining and demonstrating the sea skills while ‘spotters’ stayed close to all the lifesavers in the sea. After a Saturday night of well-deserved relaxation and partaking in the local culinary fare (delicious fish’n’chips), it was back on the beach early Sunday morning to put Saturday’s instruction into action. It was Sunday competition day! Our lifesavers can be a competitive bunch, so all that energetic racing was not only great experience for the lifesavers, but super to watch for all the parents and carers who journeyed north for the weekend. July would see all that beach training tested when RASCALS competed at the Blyth Beach Festival and were delighted to take third place – not bad for a team based in land locked Derbyshire!

Mentoring the younger lifesavers on the beach were Heather Watson, Luke Waterfall and Freddie Postlethwaite. All three athletes have just been selected for the GBR Youth Team competing at the European Youth Lifesaving Championships in Gorzów Wielkopolski and Międzyzdroje, Poland. Congratulations on this great achievement and well done to Heather Watson who was thrilled to be named Youth Vice Captain. We look forward to following their competitive journey from the European championships (August) to the Lifesaving Commonwealth championships (September) in Canada. It just goes to show, who knows where a competitive lifesaving session in a pool in Ripley with RASCALS can lead! If you would like to expand your swimming activities or try something new, please contact us.

If you would like to expand your swimming activities or try something new, please contact us. contact@ripleyrascals.org.uk | www.ripleyrascals.org.uk

One of the largest showrooms in Nottinghamshire established over 30 years

From supply only to full installation we offer the full package. Our experienced and knowledgeable design teams are here for you, offering a full, free of charge planning and design service. If you’re after a bathroom or kitchen we are serious about creating the best design possible to suit your budget.

Time for a Story!

Enid Blyton stories were a huge part of my childhood, and I would guess the same could be said for many people my age.

Who can forget The Famous Five, Noddy, The Faraway Tree, Malory Towers, and The Naughtiest Girl?

But did you know that she wrote more than 800 books in her lifetime, making her one of the most prolific authors of all time?

Born in London in 1897, she trained as a teacher and in 1918 went to work in a boys’ prep school in Kent before becoming a private governess. In the 1920s she began to write for Teacher’s World magazine and also authored educational books. Her first foray into fiction was a very slim volume of poetry published in 1922, but it was 1938 before her first full length novel for children was published.

During the 40s and 50s Enid wrote prolifically, it wasn’t uncommon for her to write and publish 20+ books in a single year - as an author myself I stand in awe of anyone that can be so creative, so consistently.

Tragically, by the late 1950s, it became apparent that Enid was suffering from dementia. She passed away in a nursing home in 1968 at the relatively young age of 71. I can only speculate, but I expect that without dementia, she may well have continued to write and create her stories well into her 80s and beyond.

Enid’s stories were very much a product of the times in which she lived, they are very white, very middle class, and she expressed attitudes towards race that cannot be condoned in the 21st century. But at their heart, they are cracking good stories that appeal to children even today.

I’m pleased to read that many of her books are being reissued with minor modifications. The original language, which is so appealing to young readers, is being retained whilst words and themes that are not in keeping with today are being subtly changed.

Many of the books have been adapted into TV series and films around the world, and apparently, an Enid Blyton book is sold at the rate of one every minute! In total, over 500 million copies of her books have been sold globally…I bet she didn’t see that coming when she released her first volume of poetry.

Books and reading were a huge part of my childhood and I’m so pleased that my 2 year old grandson seems to be equally as enamoured with the written word. Sadly, not all children are so captivated by books, preferring TV, mobile phones, and online games instead.

They miss so much by not reading. They never get to feel the excitement, the delayed gratification of turning the pages to the next scene. Their imaginations are not fired. They miss out on the joy of sitting peacefully with a book, seeing the story unfold in their head.

If you have children, grandchildren, nieces and nephews, do them a favour - buy them a book…please!

Year 1560. Italy. 15-year-old Lucrezia di Cosimo de’ Medici leaves the safety of her family home in Florence to begin arranged married life with Alfonso, Duke of Ferrara. Within a year, she was dead. The rumour was that her husband killed her.

The Italian Renaissance was a time of treachery, plot, power and sumptuous luxury. It was a dangerous time to be alive, but it was especially precarious for women, effectively held captive by their families and by outside society with little hope of release or rebellion. Their lives were largely lived in the shadow of the men at their side.

Maggie O’Farrell’s novel The Marriage Portrait is based in history. She uses historical fact and real characters from the period so finely that you feel totally enveloped and transported to the time and place.

The book is a delight, detailed and compelling – and such a page turner. Lucrezia may be trapped in this world, but she leaps out into your head through this book. A real treat if you like to be captivated by your reading matter.

Mike’sMusings

Mike is back with a tall tale and a punchline that will have you wincing! Enjoy!

Mike is always glad to hear from you at : mike.musings@outlook.com

If it’s amusing tales you want?

(After the Roger Rabbit tale from a few months ago, the feedback I got was………… can we have more please? Well, try these out!”)

A group of four-year-olds were trying very hard to become accustomed to school.

The biggest hurdle they faced was the teacher insisting that they were now old enough to stop using babyish language.

She was constantly asking them to use ‘big people’ words, just like Mum & Dad. An example of this came on the Monday that she asked the class what they had been doing over the weekend.

“Kayleigh,” she asked, “What did you do?”

When the little girl replied that she’d been to see Nana & Pops, the teacher suggested that a more grown-up way would be to say ‘GRANDPARENTS’.

When Ryker then said that he’d gone to Matlock and had a ride on the choo-choo, he was mildly admonished and told that it would be much better for him to say that he’d been on a ‘STEAM TRAIN’.

The teacher than asked Carson what he’d been doing and was pleasantly surprised, but pleased, when he said he’d been reading a book.

“That’s wonderful,” the teacher responded smiling, “and what book have you been reading?”

Carson, not used to such praise, puffed out his chest and proudly replied, “Miss, it was Winnie the S**t.”

A woman I know recently accompanied her husband to the surgery. He’d been having a few health problems, and after his check-up, the GP called the wife into his office alone.

He asked her to sit down as she had some disturbing news to impart. “Your husband,” he began, “is suffering from an extremely rare and severe disease. This combined with a high level of understandable stress is such that if you don’t follow my advice, he is likely to die in the very near future.”

“Each morning, you must fix him a healthy breakfast and be especially pleasant as it’s vital that he stay in a good mood.”

“For lunch, I’d suggest that you make him a nutritious meal, and for tea, something special, that you know he’ll enjoy.”

“You mustn’t burden him with any chores as this could exacerbate his condition and it’s important that you never discuss your problems with him as the added stress that this will undoubtedly cause, may prove fatal.”

“Finally, and this is important, as part of a planned recovery therapeutic programme, you must allow him to actively pursue his conjugal rights, without developing a headache or the like, whenever he feels the need.”

“If you can do this for the next ten months or so, it is likely that your husband will make a full recovery.” At this, the doctor wished her good luck before opening the door to reunite with her husband waiting patiently outside.

On the way home, the husband broke the eerie silence by asking, “You were in there quite some time. What did the doctor say?”

“You’re going to die,” was the speedy response.

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The warm humid conditions of summer are good for many parts of the garden but may not be so healthy for ponds

They can encourage blanket and pond weed and blue green algae which can be dangerous for dogs and cause rashes to humans. You’ll know it’s blue green algae if you swirl a stick in the water and it comes out like blue green paint. However bubble fountains such as the little solar ones available in most garden centres help keep a pond healthy. Removing weed with a stick or net will improve its overall health, but leave the weed on the side of the pond overnight to allow any critters to crawl out.

Keeping a decent shape to your lavender for next year needs action once the flowers have gone over – usually around August. Lavenders tend to look straggly if left to their own devices. When trimming don’t cut back into old wood as this may inhibit growth. Cut back to green stem and this will allow an inch or two of growth before winter putting it in a good condition for spring. Prune your blackcurrant and summer fruiting raspberries once they’ve finished fruiting. Cut back this year’s fruited canes and stems and leave the green canes for next year. If you’ve got a glut – what a wonderful thought, having a glut of rasps ! – freeze them on trays and bag for winter glee.

Top tip: Take cuttings of fuchsia, geraniums and pelargoniums for more plants net year. They’ll root easily now. Cut a healthy stem below a leaf node, make the cutting about 3 inches long, take leaves off apart from a few at the top. You can use rooting powder but they’ll probably be okay without. Plant round the edge of a plant pot in a perlite/compost mix and they should be away in no time. Take indoors or keep in a frost free space over winter.

Peak District Peat Bogs on the road to recovery

The word ‘bog’ doesn’t necessarily conjure up a positive image; in fact, it is downright negative. And yet the peatlands of the Peak are proving vital for our battle against changing climate and in holding back floodwaters through ‘slowing the flow’ when rivers are swollen after storm events. At the head of each main river catchment, the peat-bogs hold back vast quantities of water which are then released over time and alleviate potential droughts downstream. The bog moss alone holds about twenty times its own weight in water. What is more, the peatlands are wonderfully rich biodiversity sites too with unique species of plants, animals, and fungi. However, there is bad news because for over two hundred years people have drained and burned the peatlands, and our atmospheric pollution has killed off the vital sphagnum mosses which when healthy hold the water, provide habitat for rare species, and remarkably too, capture carbon that is laid down as peat. Two centuries of over-grazing by sheep has also done for the peat bogs and this reached its nadir in the late twentieth century. All in all, this is bad news, and a major cause of a collapse of what we now call ‘ecosystem services’ like floodwater control and carbon capture.

But there is good news today because with reduced sheep numbers, lowered air pollution, and some tender loving care, our bogs are bouncing back to life. Some of this is due to major investment in projects to block drains, alleviate soil acidity, and even to

re-seed sphagnum mosses back into the degraded peat landscapes. However, for me even more exciting, is the ability of nature to heal itself. My colleagues and I have been monitoring sphagnum mosses and rare flowers on Ringinglow Bog near Sheffield. It is doing what I call ‘self-rewilding’ as the peat-building bog mosses are returning with ten or more species now recorded in what was described as a ‘sphagnum desert’ back in the 1980s. This is in an area where there has been no artificial introduction of sphagnum, but nature has been left to repair itself.

Furthermore, the flowering plants of moorland and peat bog are also returning. The bog mosses are now joined by the elusive bog rosemary or ‘Andromeda’ which has returned in abundance. Last recorded in the 1960s and 1970s before the North Sea Gas pipeline cut a deep trench though both moor and bog, this plant has made a remarkable and unexpected recovery. Sundew is reappearing in its old haunts, along with one of my favourites, the diminutive upland lily, bog asphodel, and the archetypical flowers of wet bogs, the cranberry, and the cross-leaved heath. Not far away, the once extinct royal fern has reappeared and joins several other upland wet bog ferns such as hard fern, lemon-scented fern, and narrow buckler-fern.

As the bogs recover then so do associated wildlife species such as the upland dragonflies, goldenringed and black darter, and of course that often unnoticed denizen of upland bogs, the water vole. Golden plover, dunlin, and curlew are birds that also depend on these wetlands for their survival. Each visit holds the hope of the re-discovery of a precious species once thought lost forever.

Professor Ian D. Rotherham, researcher, writer, broadcaster on wildlife and environmental issues in the Peak District and elsewhere, is contactable on info@hallamec.plus.com. Follow his website