Asheville Daily Planet - October, 2011

‘The Alien’ sculpture finally ends up in Asheville museum • Pg. 9

October 2011

Vol. 7, No. 11

An Independent Newspaper Serving Greater Asheville

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Extreme weather termed climate change in action

Daily Planet Staff Photo

Having the time of their lives

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Students with the Asheville Ballet & Dance Company perform a routine during the Dirty Dancing 2011 Festival Sept. 16-18 at Lake Lure. Hundreds of people attended the second annual celebration of the film “Dirty Dancing,” where some scenes for the film were filmed. Highlights included an outdoor screening of the film, a dance competition and performances by several top-notch beach music groups. More festival photos appear on Page 8.

From Staff Reports A-B Tech’s Institute for Climate Education explored recent exreme weather trends during a Sept. 22 seminar in Ferguson Auditorium on the school’s Asheville campus.

Derek “Deke” Arndt, chief of the climate monitoring branch at National’s National Climatic Data Center, addressed “The Extreme Weather of 2011: Is this Climate Change in Action?” About 50 people attended. His presentation was followed by a question-and-answer session.

Arndt is also chairman of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration’s Climate Extremes Committee, established in 1997 to assess the scientific merit of extreme meteorological/climatological events.

“We’ve seen a really extreme weather year,” Arndt said of second the hottest summer in 117 years or recordkeeping, which was preceded by an unusually cold winter.

The year also featured the biggest drought in 12 years in parts of the country, while “more and more of the country has been dealing with more and more water (precipitation) ... We had a really violent spring for tornadoes.”

He noted that this year has already hit the record books with 10 separate weatherrelated disasters in the United States, each with economic damage costs of more than $1 billion.

Derek “Deke” Arndt speaks at A-B Tech during a Sept. 22 seminar..

“It’s pretty clear that greenhouse gases are driving the temperature change,” Arndt said, noting that “almost all of the increase (in greenhouse gases) is manmade.” He also asserted that “the greenhouse effect, itself, has been here since we’ve had” an atmosphere. However, he added, “The case is really never closed in science ... In science, you’re always open to new and better information ....

“The bottom line is, it would be irresponsible to blame it (the recent weather extremes) on climate change. It was would be just a irresponsible to dismiss the role of climate change.” He also stressed that the assumptions in his presentation “are all based on physics.”

See WEATHER, Page 7

Castro’s daughter rips dictator’s communist regime in Cuba

Alina Fernandez

By JOHN NORTH The daughter of Cuban communist revolutionary Fidel Castro interspersed vignettes of her personal experiences as a toddler and a teenager, with her recollections of her father, the revolution he led and the often horrible results it spawned during a speech Sept. 28 at UNC Asheville.

Alina Fernandez’s 30-minute speech, followed by a 45-minute question-andanswer session, drew a standing-room-only crowd of about 400 people to the 300-seat Humanities Lecture Hall.

Fernandez, 55, an outspoken critic of the Cuban communist regime, is the author of a 1998 book titled “Castro’s Daughter: An Exile’s Memoir of Cuba.” The program was co-sponsored by UNCA’s chapter of HOLA (Hispanic Outreach for Learning Awareness) and the Student Government Association.

She began by asking, rhetorically, “Why am I here tonight? I was eventually (after three years of trying) able to escape my

own country in December 1993” to Spain with the help of a fake passport and disguised as a Spanish tourist wearing a wig.

She fled because of her dissenting political views. Her daughter escaped later that month and they celebrated New Year’s Eve together that year. From Spain, she moved to Miami.

“In my case, everything started with something called a ‘revolution’ ... I come from a country where ‘the revolution’ is endless.”

She told of the trials and tribulations of living under her father’s stern — and often ruthless — rule, from when he seized power in 1959 until she fled the country 34 years later.

As an illegitimate daughter of the Castro, she lived her young life with her mother, Natalia “Naty” Revuelta Clews, who was born in Havana in 1925 and married to Dr. Orlando Fernández. Alina became a model and public relations director for a Cuban fashion company, according to

the University Program Board..

As for her personal life, she recalled her sadness — at the age of three — of Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck cartoons being replaced on Cuban television with executions ordered by Fidel Castro, as well as the dictator’s daily seven-hour speeches.

Natalia, her mother, “was beautiful and turned into the toast of Havana,” with her long blonde hair, tanned features and voluptuous figure. Fernandez said “good luck seemed to follow” her mother in whatever she did.

After Natalia married a doctor, Fulgencio Batista in 1952 took over the country in a coup d’etat that, Fernandez recalled, “was not popular with most of the people.

“Sometime after the (Batista) military strike,” Castro, then a young rebel leader, received a key from Natalia in an envelope, inviting him to use the house (in which she and her husband lived) to work out of” to stage a revolution.

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Asheville Daily Planet — October 2011 — 3

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Free-market pundit predicts U.S. economic collapse in 2011 or ‘12 Third in a series of three stories

By JOHN NORTH LAS VEGAS, Nev. — The United States will suffer an economic collapse this year, or in 2012 “at the latest,” Peter Schiff said during a luncheon speech on July 16 during FreedomFest 2011 at Bally’s hotel-casino.

Regarding the impending economic apocalypse, Schiff said. “It’s like the last nail in the coffin.”

He said the collapse is the easily predictable result of unsound economic policies espoused

by President Barack Obama’s administration and mismanagement by the Fed. Schiff’s specially Peter Schiff ticketed talk, titled “Why the Dollar Is Doomed: What’s the Next Crisis?” attracted more than 200 people.

FreedomFest, a three-day conference that drew an estimated 2,400 liberty-minded people, also featured major addresses by GOP presidential candidate Herman Cain, U.S. Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky., John Mackey, Wayne Allyn Root and Steve Forbes.

Schiff is chief executive officer and chief global strategist for Euro Pacific Capital Inc., a broker-dealer based in Westport, Conn.; and CEO of Euro Pacific Precious Metals, LLC, a gold and silver dealer based in New York City. He also is an author and a financial commentator.

He “is known for his bearish views on the dollar and dollar denominated assets, while bullish on investment in tangible assets as well as foreign stocks and currencies,” according to Wikipedia.

Schiff began his address by noting, “Last year, I ran for the Senate (in Connecticut) and spoke a lot about that” at FreedomFest.

While he lost in his bid for the seat, he said he learned a lot.

“The (Obama) administration is blaming capitalism as causing this problem” of a weak U.S. economy, Schiff said. “I ask: ‘If they don’t understand the problem, how are they going to solve it?’

“I said any economic recovery is an illusion” right now. “We were just spending more money” for any brief uptick, he said.

“We were on the verge of a very, very big and necessary recession in 2008 and 2009. Because we didn’t address it, things got worse, rather than better.

“In 2001-2002, we had a serious bursting of the stock market bubble of the (President Bill) Clinton years ... We got a housing bubble, with Americans on a spending binge.”

He added, “If anyone thinks the government stimulus is a good idea ... well, they’d have to think the housing bubble is a good idea,” Schiff said.

Even liberal thinkers such as economists Paul Krugman and Robert Reich, “understand that the average American basically is broke,” he said.

Schiff asked, “How are they going out to spend? I mean, the average American has no savings with which to spend ... The jobs come from savings ... We get to enjoy the fruits of our labor.”

Regarding the liberal school of economics that is influencing President Barack

Obama’s policies, Schiff noted, “The Keynesians say we need to spend more ...

We need to spend more like we need a hole in our heads.”

Rhetorically, he asked, “Where does the government get its money? From the people. They say, ‘From (Fed Chairman) Ben Bernanke.’ People are actually poor for all that spending, with higher prices for good gasoline.”

He said the reckless spending pattern is why “the dollar hit an all-time low this week (in mid-July) and gold hit an all-time

high. You need $1.21 (in U.S. money) to buy a Swiss franc. In 1991, when we went off the gold standard, a Swiss franc cost 23 cents (in U.S. funds).

“Despite all that’s going on with Europe, the Euro’s gaining,” Schiff said. “But the dollar’s doing worse than the Euro.”

When questioned by U.S. Rep. Ron Paul, R-Texas, a few days before Schiff’s talk in July, “Ben Bernanke said gold isn’t money,.” To Bernanke’s response, Paul asked, ”’If that is so, why don’t central banks around the world hold diamonds rather

than gold?’ Bernanke said, ‘It’s tradition.’”

Schiff recounted that Paul then asserted, “‘It’s tradition because it’s money.’”

Next, Paul asked Bernanke to explain why he thinks people are buying gold, to which the Fed chairman replied that people “are worried about political uncertainty.”

From his own perspective, Schiff said, “It has nothing to do with uncertainty. I’m buying out of certainty — I’m certain Bernanke’s reckless policies will continue ... I don’t think he’s as important as he thinks.”

See FREEDOMFEST, Page 5

MREs for earthquakes? Water filters?

Google Elenin for updates ... Oct. 16, Nov. 11, Nov. 22

FreedomFest

Continued from Page 4 Regarding Bernanke, Schiff said, “I think he’s a liar because he’s so nervous ...

Everybody’s been talking about the Fed’s economic strategy ... Who’s going to buy those worthless mortgages?”

He accused the U.S. government and the Fed of being “addicted to stimulating the economy.” However, once one starts the stimulation process, it is hard to end it. “If we stop the quantitative easing, we’re going to have a big recession,” Schiff said.

“The economy they’re trying to keep alive refuses to die,” despite the bad policies being pracited. “It’s like Frankenstein’s monster.” With the government’s continuing quantitative easing efforts, “it’s like we’re trying to sober up a drunk by giving him more alcohol.

Schiff also said Greece, Spain, Portugal and Italy exemplify the spread of the sovereign debt crisis. “The subprime is just the tip of the iceberg ... All of the morgages have the disease, it just shows up first in subprime ... We’ve got all the problems of Greece in, they just haven’t manifested yet” in the U.S. “We’re actually paying less in interest payments today with twice the debt, as we did 10 years ago. That’s why the Fed keeps interest rates low. The cost of keeping rates low is inflation.”

Schiff said the dollar’s exchange rate, “if it collapses, won’t affect domestic inflation.”

In yet another swipe at Bernanke, he said, “I don’t think Ben Bernanke is qualified to be a bank teller, much less chairman of the Fed ... The dollar’s purchasing power at home affects its value overseas. But look, if low interest rates would solve the problem, we’d have no problem.”

As for his solution to America’s economic problems, Schiff said, “In order to rebalance our economy, just get (the government and the Fed) out of the way and let the economy do its thing ... Interest rates need to go up, then we’ll have more savers, jobs and capital spending.” Instead, with Keynesian policies holding sway, “housing prices have reached new lows since any time in the (economic) decline.”

U.S. policies are so wacky, he said, “It takes a bank a year or two to get you out of your house, if you stop paying on your mortgage. So you can stay that long rentfree.

“The debt ceiling came in in 1917, when we let the Fed” take over as America’s central bank and Congress “decided to put in a debt ceiling. We’ve raised it all the time” ever since. “Pretty soon, the only thing we’ll be able to do is pay interest on the national debt ... When interest rates go up, we (the U.S.) will go into default anyway.”

He added, “Actually, default is better.

The worst thing is inflation — everybody loses who holds dollars. You get hyperinflation, which is worse than anything.

“The one ray of hope is, capitalism is a very dynamic thing. If we could have sound money and a constitutional government,” the private sector would rebound.

He also said if current trends continue much longer, “it might take a violent” revolution to restore the U.S. as a constitutional republic and land of opportunity.

“Our grandkids, they’re not going to stay here” and pay the taxes that will be required to cover the debt that is being accrued. “They’ll leave” for nations where there is more opportunity, Schiff predicted.

With a note of pride, he said, “My ancestors came here for freedom and opportunity ... The whole world is changing and much of it is embracing capitalism, just as the United States” — to its detriment — is going in the opposite direction, Schiff said.

Asheville Daily Planet — October 2011 - 5

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Cuba

Continued from Page 1 “The day, in 1953, when Fidel attacked, my mother was dispatched to delver the revolution’s manifesto to Havana. “Many men died on both sides. Fidel escaped to the mountains.”

She said Castro’s then-wife discovered her husband was in love with another woman, when love letters mailed by the rebel leader and Fernandez’s mother accidentally went to the two spouses excluded.

Fernandez told the crowd that there are two lessons to be learned from the situaton — that “men can cheat, even if you’re in jail — and, if you’re looking for a way to divorce, this is a cheap way.

In the end, they (Castro and her mother) got together and they produced me.” (The crowd applauded.)

By Jan. 1, 1959, Batista had left Cuba and “the rebels and their revolution triumphed. “Frdel Castro arrived in Havana sevral days later to give his first speech — it lasted about seven hours.”

She said that, despite the length of his speech, “he was charistmatic and mesmerizing.”

She noted that when Castrol and his men marched into Havana, the capital city, “women on the streets threw flowers at the hairy rebel men” in delight.

Fernandez recalled that the TV screens in Cuba quickly went from “liberation” to “to the wall,” meaning mass exections ordered by Castro and his top leaders.

Many people fled Cuba after Castro took over “and I was told there were traitors — ‘worms’ — that’s what they called people who left the island.”

She added, “Private property was seized or destroyed, including hotels, even parking meters.” With a laugh, she quipped that maybe the destruction of the parking meters was one of the few bright spots in Castro’s revolution.

On a more personal level, Fernandez recalled, as a toddler, seeing ‘the tall, hairy man (Castro) in a cloud of blue smoke (from his cigar-smoking) in a chair in the living room” of her mother’s house.

Meanwhile, executions (of alleged traitors) were to take the forefront.” Amid the horrors, she said 48,400 children received visas to go to the U.S. in an operation called the Peter Pan Transport.

“The first institution destroyed” under Castro’s dictatorship “was the family,” she said. Also, “Fidel Castro got worred about (so many) people leaving the country, so it (immigration) was made much harder.”

What’s more, she said, “Churches had to close down. Freedom of speech, too,” was ended. “Intellectuals were called ‘homosexuals’ and sent to ‘cultural’ camps.”

Farms were transformed into collectives and “since 1960, Cubans survived with what’s called a rationing booklet ...

It was never enough (food and drink)” on which to comfortably survive. “That’s why Cubans have had to live on a black-market basis.”

Fernandez, who was a toddler in the early years, said, “A child is able to adjust to anything.” Instead of her beloved American cartoons, the Cuban TV screens were filled with Castro and his lengthy speeches.

There also were silent Russian cartoons, which, Fernandez quipped, “Even if they had sound, they would have been boring.

“But these times were so creative and exciting” to many Cubans,” she said. “The first idea was literary. Fidel Castro decided everyone needed to be educated ... He taught farmers how to read.”

Another “masterpiece of the time,” she said, with a decided note of sarcasm, were committees for vigilance, which she described as “a sort of secret police.”

Fidel Castro in his early days.

The committees were formed, resulting in neighbors spying on neighbors. “It was very sad — family members began accusing each other,” with the consequences severe for those accused.

As for Castro, she said, “This man ... visited our house very often — mainly at night because, as many people know, Fidel Castro is a night person.” Fernandez said her mother always “was very excited” to see Castro, “but my grandma called him ‘the devil.’”

In Cuba, “Fidel was everywhere,” Fernandez recalled. “He was on TV about nine hours every day. His longest speech was 12 hours,” which she called a world record.

Fernandez marvelled that, in just one year, Castro had accomplished so much, as he took over as chief of the army, “executed any potential enemy of the revolution,” made an ally of Russia, “established ‘Hate to America’ at an international level,” and basically controlled every institution and person in Cuba. “‘Hate to America’ was his main campaign theme,” she sressed. Castro dwelt on that angle to distract his countrymen from the abysmal situation on the island.

In looking out the crowd at UNCA of mostly young faces, Fernandez asked, “Did you know Cuba was involved in every guerilla war of the 20th century?”

The Middle East and Africa, in particular, have been areas where concentrated Cuban guerilla efforts have been focused since 1960, based on Castro’s whims, she said.

“By the time I was 10 years old, I was told (Castro) was my real father. I wasn’t surprised,” Fernandez said evenly.

She eventually married and had two careers. She gave birth to her daugher in 1977. Fernandez said she saw behind the deception of the revolution early in her life and joined the dissident movement in 1979.

“The revolution becomes a dictatorship when the state owns your personal life,” she said.

She praised a Spanish tourist for helping her to leave Cuba with a falsified Spanish passport. Fernadez also thanked the American government for helping her get her daughter into the U.S. During a question-and-answer session, someone asked her for “the truth” about Cuban revolutionary Che Guevara.

There are “lots of stroies about Che Guevara,” Fernandez replied. “He was sent to the Congo” to fight after the Cuban revolution succeeded. “After that, he was sent to Bolivia,” where he met his demise.

“Che Guevara had a very sad role in Cuba. He was in charge of executions on half of the island. Fidel Castro was in charge (of executions) on the other half.”

Another person asked her view on U.S. foreign policy toward Cuba.

She said the trade embargo has “lots of holes in it.” Also, she said Castro has used the U.S. blockade as his “biggest propaganda tool ... Fidel is a genius, there’s no doubt about that. ... He could turn defeat into victory” on a regular basis.

Another person asked if Castro — through the revolution — had a vision of a

free Cuba “and it failed. If so, why?”

“That’s what we don’t know,” Fernandez replied. “History is written by the victors ...

Maybe being admired by all those people affected him.”

A woman noted that she has visited Cuba and, “if they’re raised to hate Americans, I have never seen it.” She said she was treated wonderfully by the Cubans.

“No — (they are friendly) because they love your dollars,” Fernandez said.“It’s a love-hate something.”

Someone asked what happened to her mother.

“Well, she’s still there,” Fernadez answered. “She’s one of the believers and thinks things will change for the best,” eventually..” To another question, she revealed that she and her mother “didn’t have a very good relationship.”

Another person asked, “How intrusive were the secret police in your family” when she was growing up?

“If you have contact with Fidel Castro, then you’re watched 24/7,” Fenandez replied.

“Was your father (Castro) subject to a moral code?” a man asked.

“I don’t know,” Fernandez replied. “He was so far from a normal person ... He’s a very bizarre person, emotionally. ... I think he sees emotions as a weakness ... My mother (often) felt very betrayed by him ..

He was known as a very big liar.”

Another person noted that Cuba is known for sending its doctors and medical students around the world to help others in need.

“It’s a good thing (for places) elsewhere,” Fernandez said. “It’s a great propaganda tool” for Castro. “In Cuba, there’s a doctor for every 80 to 90 people.” At the current rate, she quipped that, soon, every Cuban will have a personal doctor. “They are paid $100 a month,” which she termed

big money in Cuba. She said most people do not know that Cuba “exchanges” its doctors to other countries for oil and cash.

A young man questioned Fernandez’s portrayal of Cuba’s guerilla efforts abroad, noting that South African leader Nelson Mandela appreciated Cuba’s help in the battle to end apartheid in South Africa.

He added that Mandela’s love of Castro is well-documented.

“Some people are over-loved,” Fernandez replied. “I can tell you we’ve got some poliitcal prisoners in Cuba who have been in jail longer than Mandela.”

As the young man expressed further disagreement with her assessment, Fernandez asserted, “I’m saying we (Cubans) didn’t deserve to be used for that (guerilla warfare on foreign shores).” She reiterated her characterization of a scenario, when, on an island of 11 million people, Castro violently seized power and, under his dictatorship, “we paid a terrible toll (in lives) for that.”

Another person asked, “Would you ever go back” to Cuba?

“I don’t know,” she answered. “I wouldn’t be the first person on the first plane ... It took me three years to get out of that place.”

An older man said that, in his view, Castro was the only leader in Latin America who seemed to want to help his people.

“Well,” Fernandez said firmly, “I encourage you to go there and spend your last years there.” Her comment triggered applause from the audience.

Another man said, “The problem is, we’ve been free so long, we don’t understand what freedom is. We appreciate your speaking up.”

Besides thanking the man for noting the tendency of Americans to take freedom for granted, she thanked the audience for allowing her to speak freely. She was given a standing ovation at the program’s end.

Asheville Daily Planet — October 2011 - 7

Weather

Continued from Page 1 To get violent weather, four conditions are necessary, he said, including instability, wind sheer, a front and lots of moisture.

Arndt distinguished between weather and climate, comparing climate to the individual who trains a boxer and weather to the one who throws the punches. “Heat waves in the summer are all weather. But that fact that they (temperatures) have been increasing in the last 30 years, that’s climate.”

He said climate change “is only one thing that might be driving this ... It could be due to El Niño or La Niña,” the Arctic Oscillation, global patterns “and then there’s natural weather.”

Therefore, he said, “the suspect is across the board,” but “the increase seems to be due to an increase in greenhouse gases,” which are gases that trap heat in the atmosphere.

During the question-and-answer period, a man asserted that weather experts do not understand cloud physics and it has resulted in a huge controversy.

“We understand cloud physics,” Arndt countered. “I’m not so sure it’s as big a controversy as you might think.”

A woman wondered if the earth’s orbit around the sun has an effect on the weather.

“We’re not in a fixed orbit,” Arndt replied. “There’s some wobble ... There’s been a long-term sloshing phenomenon — not just El Niño. Also, volcanic eruptions” are affecting the weather.

A man said, “It’s always good to err on the side of caution ... Unless we find ways” to solve today’s problems, “it would be good if the science went back thousands of years” to provide more data for projections.

“There’s a lot of science that is a hundred years old or less,” Arndt answered.

“I hope I haven’t come across to (suggest) what we should do ... I think I tried to tell you what is going on.” However, he did say he is “looking forward” to the scientific community getting a better grasp of what went on during earlier periods of history.

Jim Reeves of Weaverville asked who compensated Arndt and other U.S. weather experts during a recent trip to a United Nations conference. Reeves said if they were compensated by the U.N., Arndt and the others were guilty of “a conflict of interest.” He added, “it’s not the U.S. that’s going to benefit from carbon derivative trading,” as proposed by the U.N. Arndt said it is good for scientists to meet, compare notes and learn from one another, as at the U.N. conference. Arndt said he and others from the U.S. were not compensated by the U.N. He later told the Daily Planet, “In the science community, our integrity is pretty much what we have.”

He added that the U.S. pays dues to the U.N. A man told Arndt, “You keep mentioning ‘climate change,’ but you don’t define it ... If you go back, we’re definitely cooler than the Roman period.”

After going back and forth in discussion with the man, Arndt declared, “Again, understanding the physics of what is happening is helpful.” He added that the rate of climate change “is pretty constant.”

The seminar was the second for the institute, with more to follow, including one on Oct. 13 with a focus on hurricanes and tropic storms, and at a date still to be determined in Nocember, focusing on what kind of winter Western North Carolina can expect.

The 2011 weather disasters exceeeding $1 billion in damage include the following: • In late January and early February, the Groundhog Day blizzard killed 36 people, brought major U.S. cities to a standstill, leading to $2 billion in damages.

The Heart of Downtown Asheville...

Weaverville resident Jim Reeves questioned whether U.S. weather experts had a“conflict of interest” in their work for the United Nations.

• The April 4-5 outbreak of 46 tornadoes in the Midwest and Southeast killed nine and cost $2.3 billion.

• Three days later, April 8-11, nearly 60 tornadoes swepth through the central and southern U.S., causing $2.2 billion in damage.

• Three days after that, April 14-16, another outbreak of 160 tornadoes in the southern and central U.S. killed 28 people and caused $2 billion in damage.

• Barely a week later, April 24-30 saw 305 tornadoes rip through the Southeast, Midwest and Ohilo Valley, killing 327 people and causing more than $9 billion in damage.

• A month later, a May 22-27 outbreak of 180 tornadoes killed 177, most of them in Joplin, Mo., and caused more than $7 billion in damage.

• Historic spring and summer floods on the Mississippi, and recordbreaking floods in summer on the Missouri and Souris rivers, led to at lest seven deaths and a cost of $3 billion to $5 billion. The total damage of the two weather disasters have yet to be tallied. Loss of crops and homes led the list of damage, and thousands of people evacuated as the floodwaters surged.

• The Southern U.S. is in the midst of a historic drought centered on Texas. Coupled with a record-setting heat wave, the ongoing weather disaster has runined a majority of crops and cost $1 million a day in wilfire-fighting costs.

The disaster’s cost is $5 billion and climbing.

8 - October 2011 - Asheville Daily Planet

‘Dirty Dancing’ Festival rocks Lake Lure

The Embers performed Sept. 17 at the 2nd annual “Dirty Dancing” Festival 2011 at Lake Lure, where part of the movie was made.

Daily Planet Staff Photos

The Asheville Ballet & Dance Company showed good styling.

A scene from “Dirty Dancing” was replicated in Lake Lure.

The Clovers, best known for “Love Potion No. 9,” entertain during an evening dance at the gala.

Billy Scott sings at the festival.

Asheville Daily Planet — October 2011 — 9

Art Bell’s ‘Alien’ statue finds home in city paranormal museum

“Art Bell’s ‘Alien’” reportedly has moved around his new location.

Special to the Daily Planet An icon of paranormal broadcasting is now on public display in Joshua P. Warren’s Free Museum behind Pack’s Tavern downtown.

It’s “Art Bell’s Alien,” a 5-foot-tall wooden statue, rumored to “come to life” sometimes at night.

Originally owned by Rush Limbaugh, it was gifted to North Carolina native Art Bell, a Radio Hall of Fame broadcaster who created “Coast to Coast AM,” the country’s top overnight radio program, where it stood at Bell’s home studio through decades of classic broadcasts. It has never before been on display, but will be, for this fall, in Warren’s Free Museum behind Pack’s Tavern, 4 Marjorie St., downtown Asheville.

“Art Bell called me and urgently wanted this thing out of his house,” Warren said. “I’m not exaggerating.

He said his family was disturbed by the creature, some claiming it came to life at night. Despite Bell’s sentimental attachment to the iconic figure, it had to go.”

Warren commissioned a friend to personally visit the home of Art Bell, a famous recluse, in Pahrump, Nevada, to retrieve the large statue. Bell signed the alien, while being photographed, and even provided a handwritten letter of authenticity, all on display.

“We’re doing further background research to learn about how Rush Limbaugh attained it. Rush called it ‘Carville,’ since he thought it looked like Democratic political pundit James Carville. We’re not sure, but I’ve heard Rush got rid of it because it was freaking out some of his family, as well.”

Warren, who has traveled extensively investigating “haunted and possessed” objects, like Robert the Doll “Coast to Coast AM”overnight radio show founder Art in Key West, Fla., is delighted to own this rare piece Bell urgently wanted to get rid of his “Alien” statue, of broadcasting/paranormal history, and has numerous which has found a home at Joshua P. Warren’s Free experiments and tests planned for it. “When you stand Museum behind Pack’s Tavern in downtown Asheville. there and look directly into his eyes, the alien truly does have an eerie, life-like quality,” he said. “You just have to see it in person to understand.”

Warren’s general museum is free, but the statue is kept in Special Collections, and may only be viewed with supervision, usually by reservation. To see it, one must take Warren’s Classic Haunted Asheville Tour (the city’s original) or contribute a small donation to keep the museum open.

For more information, see www.HauntedAsheville.com, or call 335-6764.

Warren is an Asheville native who has appeared on the National Geographic Channel, Discovery, Travel Channel, History Channel, SyFy Channel, TLC and Animal Planet.

The author of numerous books, including “Haunted Asheville,” he hosts “Speaking of Strange” on local radio, and frequently appears on “Coast to Coast AM.” In 2004, he and his team made the cover of the “Electric Spacecraft” scientific journal due to their groundbreaking lab experiments on the Brown Mountain Lights. His website is at www.JoshuaPWarren.com Top-rated radio talk-show host Rush Limbaugh first owned “Alien.”

Paranormal expert Joshua P. Warren is proud of adding “Alien’ to his Asheville museum.

Paranormal investigator Shelley Wright says “Alien” does resemble James Carville.

10 - October 2011 - Asheville Daily Planet

Calendar

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To place an ad for an event, call 252-6565.

Thursday, Oct. 6

HOUSE SPEAKER’S TALK, 12:30 p.m., Magnolia’s Raw Bar & Grille, 26 E. Walnut St., downtown Asheville. North Carolina House Speaker Thom Tillis will speak during a luncheon for fellow Republicans and independents in the area. His talk, hosted by the Buncombe County GOP, will offer an update on the state House of Representatives as well as a discussion of issues in Buncombe and the state.

AUTHOR’S TALK, 7 p.m., Malaprop’s Bookstore/Café, 55 Haywood St., downtown Asheville.

Josh Ritter will discuss his novel “Bright’s Passage.”

CONCERT, 7:30 p.m., Lipinsky Auditorium, UNC Asheville. A contemporary music concert will feature student performances of 20th and 21st century music, as well as their own compositions.

CONTRA DANCE, 8 p.m., Bryson Gym, Warren Wilson College, Swannanoa. A contra dance is held weekly, preceded by beginner’s lessons at 7:30 p.m. Admission is $6.

Friday, Oct. 7

LECTURE, 11:25 a.m., Lipinsky Auditorium, UNC Asheville. A lecture on “Nationalism and Religion: Modernity and the Ottoman Empire” will be presented by Rodger Payne, associate professor of religious studies. The lecture is free

and open to the public.

LECTURE, 11:25 a.m., Humanities Lecture Hall, UNC Asheville. A lecture on “Sexuality and Identity: Contemporary Discourses” will be presented by Lorena Russell, chair and associate professor of literature. The lecture is free and open to the public.

BOOK-SIGNING, 5 p.m., Malaprop’s Bookstore/Café, 55 Haywood St., downtown Asheville.

Alchemist Robert Allen Bartlett will sign “Real Alchemy” and “The Way of the Crucible.”

AUTHOR’S PRESENTATION, 6 p.m., Accent on Books, 854 Merrimon Ave., Asheville. Rex Redmond will present his work, “Beaverdam Valley.”

CONCERT, 6 p.m., Chambers Gymnasium, Mars Hill College, Mars Hill. For the second consecutive year, The Dynamic Imperials will perform what is billed as “a classic blend of beach music and rhythm and blues” for the MHC homecoming dance. The band, formed during its members college years in the late 1960s as Bob Drake and The Imperials, reunited last year, more than 40 years after all 10 members graduated and went their separate ways.

BOOK-SIGNING, 7 p.m., Malaprop’s Bookstore/Café, 55 Haywood St., downtown Asheville.

Pat Macenulty will sign “Wait Unitl Tomorrow: A Daughter’s Memoir.”

EDDIE MONEY CONCERT, 8 p.m., Diana stage, Biltmore Estate, Asheville. Eddie Money, known for his blue-collar brand of rock ‘n’ roll, will perform. Money burst onto the scene with his 1977double-platinumalbumfeaturing“BabyHold On” and “Two Tickets to Paradise.” Hits to follow included “Think I’m in Love,”“Shakin,”“I Wanna Go Back,” and the Grammy-nominated duet with Ronnie Spector, “Take Me Home Tonight.” For tickets, which are $60, visit http://www.biltmore. com/visit/calendar/concerts/11_eddie_money.asp.

Saturday, Oct. 8

HOMECOMING FESTIVAL, 9 a.m.-1:30 p.m., upper quad, Mars Hill College, Mars Hill. Alumni will set up booths, sell their wares and demonstrate crafts. Student organizations also will run informational booths and sell items for fundraisers. Games for children will be available. The national champion Bailey Mountain Cloggers will

The Dynamic Imperials, first formed at Mars Hill College in the 1960s as Bob Drake and the Imperials and reunited last year, will perform a classic blend of beach music and rhythm and blues, beginning at 6 p.m. Friday in MHC’s Chambers Gymnasium as part of the school’s homecoming festival. The concert-dance will be preceded by a dinner — for all MHC alumni — of North Carolina barbecue. perform at 11:30 a.m., noon and 12:30 p.m. The festival will replace the MHC homecoming parade, which has been declining in popularity in recent years. In the homecoming football game at 1:30, MHC will host Wingate University.

FIESTA LATINA, noon-8 p.m., Pack Square Park, downtown Asheville The 14th Annual Fiesta Latina, a free event, will showcase Latin food, a children’s area, live music and dance classes, FUNDRAISER, 5:30 p.m., WNC Air Museum, 1340 E. Gilbert St., Hendersonville. A Red, White and Blue Jean Party Fundraiser will be hosted by the Henderson County RepublicanWomen’s Club.

The evening will begin with music by Cabin Creek country band and later with Tom Brown and his One Man Band. Also feature will be four-time world champion cloggers, Southern Connection, who will entertain as well as teach line dancing.

Barbecue will be provided what is billed as a “famous” chef from Kannapolis. The meal will feature beef brisket, chicken and pulled pork, as well as all the trimmings that go along with it.

Also, there will be raffle items, door prizes and a silent auction throughout the evening. The cost is $25 per person. Tickets must be purchased in advance, with no ticket sales at the door. For further information and to register, contact Eve Gregg, 236 Greenleaf Drive, Flat Rock N.C. 28731 (828-698-2772)This will be an evening of fun, food, fellowship and entertainment. Candidates and elected officials are invited to meet and greet but there will be no political speeches, just a time to meet fellow Republicans and support the HCRWC.

See CALENDAR, Page 9

Asheville Daily Planet — October 2011 — 11

Calendar

percent of Mensa’s test are eligible for membership. For reservations, which are required because of space limits, call Wayne Stanko at 2538781 or visit wstanko@ charter.net.

OUTDOOR CONCERT/ DANCE, 6-8:30 p.m., outside Firehouse Subs, Spartanburg Highway, Hendersonville. Tom Brown “One-Man Band” and Chuck Hill will perform music at the Cruz and Groove concert series. Attendees are encouraged to dance.

Admission is free.

CONCERT, 7-9 p.m., Town Square park in front of Hickory Tavern, Biltmore Park, Asheville.

Now You See Them will perform in a free outdoor concert.

Continued from Page 8

Saturday, Oct. 8

BOOK-SIGNING, 5 p.m., Malaprop’s Bookstore/Café, 55 Haywood St., downtown Asheville.

Marlin Barton will sign his novel “The Cross Garden.: CONCERT, 7-9 p.m., Town Square park in front of Hickory Tavern, Biltmore Park, Asheville. Common Saints will perform in a free outdoor concert.

SHAG DANCE, 8-11 p.m., Riverside Pavilion Restaurant and Dance Hall, 3105 Memorial Hwy., Lake Lure. The Lake Lure Shag Club will hold a shag dance, with music provided by DJs Sonny and Theressa Day. The cover charge is $3.

Sunday, Oct. 9

FUNDRAISER, 8 a.m.-4 p.m., High Vista Country Club and Community, 88 Country Club Rd., Mills River. High Vista will honor Capt. Jeff Bowen, a fallen firefighter with a fundraiser for the Asheville Fire Department to purchase specialized equipment in Bowen’s honor. In addition making a contribution for each game of golf played at the country club, HVCC’s “Birdies for Bowen” committee has been working with the greater community to offer items for raffles, a lemonade stand, selling hole sponsorships and much more.

Frankie Bones, located in High Vista’s Robinson Pub will be proudly serving the “Bowen Burger” – a favorite of the captain with 50 proceeds of the proceeds going to the fund. Children’s activities will be offered from noon to 4 p.m., including an on-site fire truck, emergency equipment, friendly, smiling fire fighters and a few surprises. Raffles will be announced at 5 p.m. — and one does not need be present to win.

AUTHOR’S READING, 3 p.m., Malaprop’s Bookstore/Café, 55 Haywood St., downtown Asheville. Ron Rash, the award-winning Western North Carolina novelist, will read from his new book of poems, “Waking.”

CONCERT, 3-5 p.m., Fine and Performing Arts Center, Western Carolina University, Cullowhee.

The Grascals will perform in a show titled “Dance Till Your Stockings Are Hot and Revelin’.” The Grascals, named the International Bluegrass Music Association’s Entertainers of the year in 2006 and 2007, pay a musical tribute to “The Andy Griffit Show” with their trademark take on traditional bluegrass and classic country. For tickets, which are $20 for the general public, $15 for WCU faculty and staff and $5 for students and children, call the box office at 227-2479.

Monday, Oct. 10

WEST COAST SWING CLASSES, 7:30 and 8 p.m., The Hangar, Clarion Hotel, Fletcher. Free beginners’ lessons for West Coast Swing will be held at 7:30, followed by intermediate lessons at 8 every Monday. The lessons are free. After the lessons, an open dance will be held.

CONTRA DANCE, 8 p.m., Bryson Gym, Warren Wilson College, Swannanoa. A contra dance is held weekly, preceded by beginner’s lessons at 7:30 p.m. Admission is $6.

Tuesday, Oct. 11

TANGO LESSON/DANCE, 6 p.m., The Boiler Room, Grove House Entertainment Complex, 11 Grove St., downtown Asheville. Tango lessons will precede a dance.

SWING LESSON/DANCE, 6:30 p.m., Club Eleven, Grove House Entertainment Complex, 11 Grove St., downtown Asheville. A lesson will be followed by a dance, with live music.

Wed., Oct. 12

LECTURE, 11:25 a.m., Lipinsky Auditorium, UNC Asheville. A lecture on “Medieval India” will be presented by Keya Maitra, associate professor of philosophy. The lecture is free and open to the public.

TEA TIME SOCIAL, 6 p.m., Ryan’s Family Steak House, 1000 Brevard Rd., Asheville. The Asheville Tea Party will hold its weekly Tea Time Social. All interested are invited to attend.

SHAG DANCE, 7-11 p.m., Shifters, 2310 Hendersonville Rd., Arden. The Mountain Shag Club will offer free shag dancing lessons with a DJ. Admission is $5.

Thursday, Oct. 13

CLUB DINNER MEETING, 6 p.m., Renais-

The Fab Four tribute show will be performed at 8 p.m. Oct. 14 at the Biltmore Estate in Asheville. sance Hotel, downtown Asheville. The Blue Ridge Republican Women’s Club will meet for dinner at 6, followed by a meeting at 6:30. The featured speaker will be Laura McCue, who will address “Taxes — Fair, Flat and VAT.” The meal is $18. All are welcome. For reservations, call 778-4186.

CONTRA DANCE, 8 p.m., Bryson Gym, Warren Wilson College, Swannanoa. A contra dance is held weekly, preceded by beginner’s lessons at 7:30 p.m. Admission is $6.

Friday, Oct. 14

LECTURE, 11:25 a.m., Lipinsky Auditorium, UNC Asheville. A lecture on “Imperialism in Popular Culture and in Asia” will be presented by Holly Iglesias, lecturer in the Master of Liberal Arts Program. The lecture is free and open to the public.

LECTURE, 11:25 a.m., Humanities Lecture Hall, UNC Asheville. A lecture on Globalization” will be presented by Surain Subramaniam, associate professor of political science. The lecture is free and open to the public.

SYMPHONY TALK, 3 p.m., Manheimer Room, Reuter Center, UNC Asheville. A “Symphony Talk With Daniel Meyer” will preview the next concert by the Asheville Symphony Orchestra, with Meyer, who is its musical director. The discussion is free and open to the public.

PREPPER CONFERENCE, 6-9 p.m., Cherrydale Place Church, 2300 Old Buncombe Rd., Greensville, S.C. A two-day Sensible Prepper Conference will address the many issues of preparedness.

In addition to a lineup of noted speakers, the conference will offer an opportunity to network with people in the area. There also will be displays of needed gear and vendors with items to sell.

Doors open at 5 p.m. Friday and 8 a.m. Saturday.

Friday’s conference hours are from 6-9 p.m., while Saturday’s are from 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. On Saturday, lunch will be provided by the Cherrydale Place Youth Group, with proceeds going to their Youth Fund. Meals will be $5, plus additional snacks and drinksavailablethroughouttheconferecnce.Adult admission is $2 on Friday and $3 on Saturday.

Children under 12 will be admitted for $1 per day.

FAB FOUR TRIBUTE CONCERT, 8 p.m., Diana stage, Biltmore Estate, Asheville. A concert featuring The Fab Four — The Ultimate Tribute With Ed Sullivan will be performed. The Fab Four is billed as elevating above other Beatles tribute bands due to their precise attention to detail.“With uncanny, note-for-note live renditions of Beatles’ songs, the Fab Four make you think you are watching the real thing. Attendees will hear what are billed as “record-perfect” live performances of such classics as “Can’t Buy Me Love,”“Yesterday,”“Penny Lane,”“Here Comes The Sun,” and “Hey Jude.”

For tickets, which are $60, visit http://www. biltmore.com/visit/calendar/concerts/11_fab_four. asp.

Saturday, Oct. 15

MENSA TESTING, 1:30 p.m., Community Room, North Asheville Library, 1030 Merrimon Ave., Asheville. French Broad Mensa, Western North Carolina’s chapter of the high-IQ society, will host a test. Individuals scoring in the top 2

Sunday, Oct. 16

CONCERT, 7:30 p.m., Lipinsky Auditorium, UNC Asheville. The UNCA Wind Ensemble will perform in concert, under the direction of Milton Crotts.

Monday, Oct. 17

WEST COAST SWING CLASSES, 7:30 and 8 p.m., The Hangar, Clarion Hotel, Fletcher. Free beginners’ lessons for West Coast Swing will be held at 7:30, followed by intermediate lessons at 8 every Monday. The lessons are free. After the lessons, an open dance will be held.

CONTRA DANCE, 8 p.m., Bryson Gym, Warren Wilson College, Swannanoa. A contra dance is held weekly, preceded by beginner’s lessons at 7:30 p.m. Admission is $6.

Tuesday, Oct. 18

TANGO LESSON/DANCE, 6 p.m., The Boiler Room, Grove House Entertainment Complex, 11 Grove St., downtown Asheville. Tango lessons will precede a dance.

SWING LESSON/DANCE, 6:30 p.m., Club Eleven, Grove House Entertainment Complex, 11 Grove St., downtown Asheville. A lesson will be followed by a dance, with live music.

Wed., Oct. 19

TEA TIME SOCIAL, 6 p.m., Ryan’s Family Steak House, 1000 Brevard Rd., Asheville. The Asheville Tea Party will hold its weekly Tea Time Social. All who are interested are invited to attend.

SHAG DANCE, 7-11 p.m., Shifters, 2310 Hendersonville Rd., Arden. The Mountain Shag Club will offer free shag dancing lessons with a DJ. Admission is $5.

Thurs., Oct. 20

CONCERT, 7:30 p.m., Lipinsky Auditorium, UNC Asheville. UNCA’s jazz combos will perform selections in concert under the direction of William Bares and Brian Felix.

CONTRA DANCE, 8 p.m., Bryson Gym, Warren Wilson College, Swannanoa. A contra dance is held weekly, preceded by beginner’s lessons at 7:30 p.m. Admission is $6.

Friday, Oct. 21

CHAIRMEN/EMBERS CONCERT, 8 p.m., Diana stage, Biltmore Estate, Asheville. The Chairmen of the Board and The Embers will perform their different styles of rhythm and blues music.

General Johnson and the Chairmen of the Board became super stars in the Carolinas beach music genre and have been dubbed “the Kings of the Carolinas.” This year, the Chairmen of the Board bring their 2011“Tribute to General Johnson”tour in honor of General Johnson who died in 2010.

Well-known hits include “Carolina Girls,”“Give Me Just a Little More Time” and “You’ve Got Me Dangling On A String.” I addition, The Embers, one of the most popular beach music bands in the country, have been playing a mix of rhythm and blues and heart and soul for decades. Named North Carolina’s Official Musical Ambassadors,

The Embers were inducted into the South Carolina Rhythm & Blues Hall of Fame. For tickets, which are$47,visithttp://www.biltmore.com/visit/calendar/concerts/11_chairmen_embers.asp.

Saturday, Oct. 22

DEMOCRATIC RECEPTION/DINNER, 5:30 p.m., The Grove Park Inn, Asheville. The North Carolina Democratic Party will host its 51st annual Western Gala. The reception begins at 5:30, followed by dinner at 7 p.m. Tickets for the reception and dinner are $250, while dinner-only is $100. For tickets, call Sallie Leslie at (919) 821-2777, ex.

205, or visit sleslie@ncdp.org.

CONCERT, 7-9 p.m., Town Square park in front of Hickory Tavern, Biltmore Park, Asheville. Rathkeltair will perform in a free outdoor concert.

Monday, Oct. 24

WEST COAST SWING CLASSES, 7:30 and 8 p.m., The Hangar, Clarion Hotel, Fletcher. Free beginners’ lessons for West Coast Swing will be held at 7:30, followed by intermediate lessons at 8 every Monday. The lessons are free. After the lessons, an open dance will be held.

CONTRA DANCE, 8 p.m., Bryson Gym, Warren Wilson College, Swannanoa. A contra dance is held weekly, preceded by beginner’s lessons at 7:30 p.m. Admission is $6.

Sunday, Oct. 23

CONCERT, 4 p.m., Lipinsky Auditorium, UNC Asheville. The UNCA Jazz Band and Stuio 18 Vocal Jazz Ensemble Concert will be held. Featured will be big band and jazz vocal selections presented by students under the direction of William Bares and Melodiee Galoway.

Tuesday, Oct. 25

TANGO LESSON/DANCE, 6 p.m., The Boiler Room, Grove House Entertainment Complex, 11 Grove St., downtown Asheville. Tango lessons will precede a dance.

SWING LESSON/DANCE, 6:30 p.m., Club Eleven, Grove House Entertainment Complex, 11 Grove St., downtown Asheville. A lesson will be followed by a dance, with live music.

Wed., Oct. 26

TEA TIME SOCIAL, 6 p.m., Ryan’s Family Steak House, 1000 Brevard Rd., Asheville. The Asheville Tea Party will hold its weekly Tea Time Social. All who are interested are invited to attend.

SHAG DANCE, 7-11 p.m., Shifters, 2310 Hendersonville Rd., Arden. The Mountain Shag Club will offer free shag dancing lessons with a DJ. Admission is $5.

Thurs., Oct. 27

CONTRA DANCE, 8 p.m., Bryson Gym, Warren Wilson College, Swannanoa. A contra dance is held weekly, preceded by beginner’s lessons at 7:30 p.m. Admission is $6.

Saturday, Oct. 29

OUTDOOR CONCERT/DANCE, 6-8:30 p.m., outside Firehouse Subs, Spartanburg Highway, Hendersonville. Tom Brown “One-Man Band” and Chuck Hill will perform music at the Cruz and Groove concert series. Attendees are encouraged to dance. Admission is free.

CONCERT, 7-9 p.m., Town Square park in front of Hickory Tavern, Biltmore Park, Asheville. Uncle Mountain will perform in the season finale of the free outdoor concert.

Sunday, Oct. 30

CONCERT, 4 p.m., Lipinsky Auditorium, UNC Asheville. A concert, “Mozart Mosaic,” will be performed by the UNCA Symphony, under the direction of Milton Crotts, and the University Singers, under the direction of Melodie Galloway.

Monday, Oct. 31

WEST COAST SWING CLASSES, 7:30 and 8 p.m., The Hangar, Clarion Hotel, Fletcher. Free beginners’ lessons for West Coast Swing will be held at 7:30, followed by intermediate lessons at 8 every Monday. The lessons are free. After the lessons, an open dance will be held.

CONTRA DANCE, 8 p.m., Bryson Gym, Warren Wilson College, Swannanoa. A contra dance is held weekly, preceded by beginner’s lessons at 7:30 p.m. Admission is $6.

12 - October 2011 - Asheville Daily Planet

Daily Planet’s Opinion

Memo to governor: ‘Whoa, Nellie!’

We hope North Carolina Gov. Bev Perdue either steps down or chooses not to run for another term in office — as we fear she might try to change the rules, or relax them, so that she could serve as governor-for-life.

To put it kindly, Perdue uttered some remarks that were ill-considered — or maybe sincerely meant — to the Cary Rotary Club on Sept. 27.

“I think we ought to suspend, perhaps, elections for Congress for two years and just tell them we won’t hold it against them, whatever decision they make, to just let them help this country recover. I really hope that someone can agree with me on that,” she told the Rotarians.

Of course, the move that the governor claims to be joking about would be unconstitutional.

The governor’s remark — and whether it was said in jest or serves

as yet another example of certain elected officials, including President Barack Obama intently wanting to waive the Constitution to achieve their own ends — was picked up locally by “The Matt Mittan Show” and nationally by The Drudge Report and Rush Limbaugh’s talk show.

Perdue spokeswoman Chris Mackey later said, “Come on. Gov. Perdue was obviously using hyperbole to highlight what we can all agree is a serious problem: Washington politicians who focus on their own election instead of what’s best for the people they serve.”

Before the gaffe, Perdue’s polling numbers were sagging — at 42 percent approval of the job she is doing.

Even if one gave Perdue the benefit of the doubt, joking about shelving the Constitution and democracy is highly inappropriate for a governor.

Is Perry ‘roast’ in North Carolina?

CHAPEL HILL — “After what he said about our barbecue, he is a dead duck in North Carolina.”

A Democrat was celebrating the report that Texas Gov. Rick Perry once made a disparaging remark about our favorite food.

According to a news report that quoted one of my favorite books, “Holy Smoke: The Big Book of North Carolina Barbecue” by John Shelton Reed and Dale Volberg Reed, Perry, when he ate Eastern North Carolina barbecue in 1992, said, “I’ve had road kill that tasted better than that.”

Sure enough, after the North Carolina barbecue road kill story started circulating, Perry’s campaign, which had been sailing along at a pace that made Perry look like the sure nominee, took a nosedive.

The news reports said his debate performance was sub-par. His opponents attacked his decision to require girls in Texas to be vaccinated against a sexually transmitted virus associated with vaginal cancer. They jumped on his advocacy for tuition support for illegal immigrants attending college in Texas. Then Herman Cain crushed him (37 percent to 15) in the Florida straw poll, and Mitt Romney did the same in Michigan (50 percent to 17).

“Don’t mess with Texas,” Perry says.

Maybe he will have to learn, “Don’t mess with North Carolinians and their barbecue.”

If he wants some background about the political implications of “messing” with our barbecue, he can talk to our former attorney general and secretary of state, Rufus Edmisten. According to “Holy Smoke,” Edmisten “learned a painful lesson” when he was running for governor more than 25 years ago. At the time, somebody heard him saying, “I’ve eaten enough barbecue. I am not going to eat any more. I’m taking my stand and that is it.”

Today, Edmisten can laugh about his mistake. “Holy Smoke” quotes him, “I’d be eating barbecue three times a day for a solid year, and I got up one night and, in a very, very lax moment — the devil made me do it — I made a horrible statement. I said, ‘I’m through with barbecue.’ Well, you would have thought I made a speech against my mother, against apple pie, cherry pie, the whole mess.”

It was not a joke during the campaign.

D.G. Martin On Sept. 20, 1983, a Wilmington Morning Star editorial, titled “Swine cooks the Rufus goose” took him to task, “If his opponents have the sense God gave a yam, they will mount Mr. Edmisten on a spit and roast him patiently on hickory coals until he is done, And then they will pick his bones.”

Now, another North Carolina commentator, Jeffrey Weeks, makes a similar suggestion in response to Perry’s “road kill” comment. “If Rick Perry wants to bring his campaign to the Carolinas we, of course, won’t reject him.

We’ll welcome him with good ol’ southern hospitality. We’ll even show him how to cook real barbeque, not with a cow (Lord have mercy) but with a pig. And I know just the pig we’ll roast. ‘Governor’ Perry.”

So is Perry’s campaign mortally wounded?

Is it “toast” — or, as Weeks suggests, “roast”?

Not so fast.

A couple of weeks ago, former White House press secretary Robert Gibbs surprised me with his comments about Perry. Although he declined to speculate about which possible Republican presidential candidate would be easier or harder to beat, he cautioned not to underrate Perry. Gibbs thinks that Perry could be a strong candidate in the general election, notwithstanding his seemingly over-the-top positions on Social Security and North Carolina barbecue.

What Perry has, according to Gibbs, that the other Republican candidates lack, is “that he is comfortable in his boots — like Ronald Reagan.”

If Gibbs is right, Perry will not be thrown off course by his campaign’s recent downturns, and this time next year, he will be a formidable challenger to President Obama.

• D.G. Martin hosts UNC-TV’s North Carolina Bookwatch, which airs at 9:30 p.m. Fridays and 5 p.m. Sundays. For more information or to view prior programs visit the webpage at www.unctv.

Letters to the Editor Political prostitution, procrastination decried

Political prostitution and proscrastination are two of our cultures’ greatest dangers.

Decisions made and acted upon, by those in power, reflective of financial rewards and enhanced power rather than reality or principle, are common.

Those decisions postponed through insecurity and proscrastination are equally dangerous and destructive. No decision and action is usually the worst decision regarding existing options.

It has long been known that the most effective individuals and cultures are the ones making and executing the most principlebased decisions.

The results of political prostitution can be seen in our failed I-26/bridge and Civic Center issues. It is obvious that Asheville’s political leaders are no different than our paralyzed politicians in Washington.

Hopefully, the voters will show a rapid and decisive action with a huge voter turnout. After all, the voters are responsible.

DON BOONE Asheville

Paper slammed for failing to enforce word-limit rule

Though I have no comment on the political content of the letter (in September’s Daily Planet) titled “Legislators urged to end N.C.’s spoils sytem,” I do, however, have a comment for your letters to the editor page.

Your regulations for letters state a 200word maximum, yet you allow this Lee Ballard to monopolize your column.

How is this fair to the people have have much to say, but learned as a child that rules are rules, so they fllow them?

You are allowing someone who thinks they deserve more than everyone else

special rights, when such person should go unpublished for not following the rules.

Like crossing against traffic or not parking your car in the middle of the road, there are reasons for such rules.

If you want to publish such letters, revoke your current regulations.

J.W. ABBOTT Waynesville

Fed’s lowering of rates termed wealth-destroying

Urgent and dangerous ... Right now — today! The Fed is trying to artificially lower interest rates AGAIN. This is a dumb, (or corrupt?) misguided policy because interest rates are NOT a problem for our economy.

Low rates destroy the value of our dollar, causing massive harm to low and middle class workers. As the dollar loses value, the price of everything goes up. Especially gas and food! The current low rates are also killing our seniors who depend on their bank CDs for income.

Lowering rates will NOT help American companies who are sitting on the largest pile of cash in the history of our country. If companies want to borrow, rates are NOT the issue; they are the lowest in over 60+ years!

Call and write your Congress and insist that the Fed stay out of our free market.

Many of our REAL problems are directly attributable to the Fed’s artificial, cheap/ free money policies over the last 10 years!

The current government is trying to “inflate” its way out of the debt crisis. If history is to be trusted, this will inevitably lead to disaster!

Call, write or e-mail today! Soon it will be too late ....

STEVEN CHASE Boone Continued on Page 14

On the right The Candid Conservative

Moral courage personified

Nobel Prize-winner Ivar Giaever was once an Obama mascot. In 2008, he endorsed him for the Nobel Peace Prize.

Things change — especially for independent thinkers with moral courage. It seems the good doctor recently returned his renewal as a Fellow of the prestigious American Physics Society.

Turns out he felt his peer group was running on auto-pilot in their advocacy for man-made global warming. Dr. Giaever noted the society’s own data stated that earth’s temperature has averaged between 58.7 and 60.2 degrees for 150 years — cause for celebration not calamity.

He amended his 2008 misstep with Obama with a 2009 retraction letter co-signed by 100 colleagues. His missive chastised PBO’s stand on global warming — calling it a “grossly overstated” scam.

Giaever is one of a number of prominent scientists resigning from the APS. That list includes physicist Hal Lewis, who, before his May death, identified global warming as “the greatest pseudoscientific fraud he’d ever seen.”

A solar money collector

In his must-read book for culturists, “The Vision of the Anointed,” American economist Thomas Sowell warned of the tyrannical impulses of the left.

More specifically, he cautioned that their arrogance of position inevitably leads to ends justifies the means thinking — the license to do pretty much anything you want to because you

Carl Mumpower believe your mission is special.

Despots and demagogues have practiced this harmful form of denial throughout time. It’s amazing what you can do when the rules no longer matter.

The PBO administration’s embrace of Solyndra solar technologies serves as a striking example. They’ve championed an investment of a half billion dollars in this boondoggle — in spite of repeated warnings from their own budget office.

The anointed run on emotion, not reason, and believe faith and good intentions will insure victory over reality.

Even out of business, Solyndra’s web site still states that its “power solutions offer strong return on investment and make great business sense.”

The vanities of big egos licensed by big government continue to make America another day older and deeper in debt.

• Carl Mumpower, a former member of Asheville City Council, may be contacted at drmumpower@thecandidconservative.com

Asheville Daily Planet — October 2011 — 13

14 - October 2011 - Asheville Daily Planet

On the left The Progressive-Libertarian

I-26 Connector ‘accelerated’

On Sept. 7, Gov. Beverly Perdue announced that several highway loop projects would be accelerated, thanks to infusion of federal funds, and reduced real estate and construction costs due to the recession.

The section of I-26 between I-40 and Haywood Rd. is among those projects to be speeded up. Aquisition of right-of-way is now slated to begin in 2018 and construction in 2020.

I note that this still leaves the highly problematic section of the I-26 connector somewhere out in the very indefinite future.

Letters

Cecil Bothwell For those who are eager to get the project built, that’s dismaying at best. For my part, I continue to believe that the long delay in reconfiguration of I-26 and I-240 will benefit the city.

Continued from Page 12

Jan Davis backed in bid for re-election to council

Allow me to add my endorsement and wholehearted support to re-elect Jan Davis to Asheville City Council.

His deep roots in the community and his four decades of civic and governmental service uniquely equip him to be the ideal member of council. During his two terms, he has demonstrated his leadership skills in facilitating, uniting and collaborating with all the stakeholders in the community.

Asheville’s future will be greatly enhanced with his historical perspective and realistic vision for the future. Let’s express our thanks to him for his unselfish and tireless efforts by voting for him and urging friends and neighbors to do likewise. We need his services on council now more than ever.

DORLAND WINKLER Asheville

Orange Peel criticized for sound, A/C problems

I went to see the Johnny Winter concert at the Orange Peel in Asheville on Aug. 11.

He is one of my favorites. The only one who is better than Johnny is his brother Edgar (who was not at the Asheville concert).

All and still, Johnny performed well.

As for Edgar, he’s got a voice and he’s multi-talented as far as instruments go — he can do anything with keyboards, clarinet and sax. Edgar still plays the guitar. Edgar is one of two people I know whose voice is clearer than the vinyl. The other one is Carol McDonald. She had a group called Isis from 1974 to 1979.

I went to see Johnny Winter before in a concert at the now-defunct Lone Star Café in New York City, back in 1984. But serendipitiously, I did not have to pay to see Johnny Winter because Dr. John “The Night Tripper” (Mac Revvenaack) was there. Johnny Winter was just as good then as he is now, if not better.

As for seeing Johnny Winter at the Orange Peel, he did not falter on a note. But the music technician did not know how to adjust the amplifiers, which made it bad.

Johnny might have lost some of his senses (sight issues and carpal tunnel syndrome in one hand), but man, he knows his guitarwork forward and backward — and then sideways. He was great and the operation was a success, despite the sound problems..

Someone as distinguished as Johnny should have had someone better at the controls, or maybe they need a better control panel. That was horrible for them to let that occur like that. The technicians at the Orange Peel didn’t have the foggiest idea of what they were doing, let the chips fall

Bluesman Johnny Winter where they may. Someone new needs to be hired there, at least for that realm of music category. That was the distrubing part.

Also, it wasn’t a real hot day, but it was uncomfortably warm in the Orange Peel.

They need to do something about the air-conditioning. I’ve seen other shows there, and every time, it’s pretty unsuitable for that habitat — and, by the way, it was crowded, but it was not sold out.

When I went to see George Clinton and the P-Funk All-Stars, that was soldout and very uncomfortable. On another occasion, I saw Bootsy Collins and it was uncomfortably warm.

That night that I went to see Dr. John, Johnny was there. He was sitting in a booth. I thought it was a chick in this black big hat, belting down the drinks, but it was Johnny.

M.E. BRANCH Asheville

GOP accused of backing corporations over Obama Let me sum up this (last) week for you: President Obama: JOBS, JOBS, JOBS.

NCDOT remains committed to an 8-lane highway here (which means 10 lanes including on/off ramps through most of that stretch), while other cities around the country are ripping out such huge projects to restore splintered urban centers.

• Cecil Bothwell, a member of Asheville City Council and a self-proclaimed progressive-libertarian, is running for the Democratic nomination for the seat now held by U.S. Rep. Heath Shuler, DWaynesville.

The Republican Party: NO, NO, NO. President (Barack) Obama presented his plan. The only plan Republicans have put forward is to say “no” to President Obama and “yes” to big corporations calling the shots, undermining the social safety net we pay for with our taxes, and, if you get sick: you’re on your own. In short: their plan is an assault on our values.

Their vision is dangerous – and we’re in danger of it becoming reality if Republicans flip just FOUR Senate seats in 2012.

We can’t let that happen.

That’s why the DSCC (Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee) needs your help to raise $585,000 before Sept. 30, so we can make sure Democrats don’t lose races that we can win. We literally can’t afford to fall short.

Rick Perry calls Social Security a “Ponzi scheme” and Mitt Romney compares it to a criminal enterprise.

And now one GOP congressman is complaining that President Obama’s plan would force him to live on just $400,000 a year. Once again, the GOP just doesn’t understand the challenges Americans are facing today.

The year 2012 will decide whether we focus on creating jobs, like Democrats want, or protecting millionaires and big corporations, like Republicans demand. We can win. But we need your help.

There are many reasons we’re Democrats. But perhaps one of the most important is this: We know that a strong middle class makes our country stronger. Thanks for joining me to fight for what we believe in.

KAREN FINNEY Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee Asheville

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Asheville Daily Planet — October 2011 — 15

Commentary Guest viewpoint

Capitalism’s good, but not immoral variety and enablers

EDITOR’S NOTE: Lee Ballard lives in Mars Hall.

• This is not a rant against capitalism.

Capitalism works. This is a rant against IMMORAL capitalism — and politicians who enable it.

Capitalism came directly out of the Protestant Reformation, which taught that work has benefits for the individual and for society as a whole.

Success is good. And Jesus didn’t condemn business, either; his parables assume business. What Jesus slams is the person/business that (Luke 12:21) “stores up things for himself but is not rich toward God.” Being rich toward God is what we can call “moral capitalism.” John Calvin’s guiding principle was, “Care for your fellow man.”

It’s easy to see how one person who owns a business can be rich toward God — generosity and being fair to workers. But should large corporations, with 50th-floor offices and thousands of employees, be held accountable as being moral or immoral? Yes, they should.

If we stand off and look, there’s one thing that underlies almost all immoral corporate actions: excessive greed. Businesses can make moral or immoral choices.

If financial institutions, for example, take huge risks, putting us all in jeopardy, that’s immoral.

Likewise if they send jobs overseas,

Lee Ballard showing no loyalty to faithful workers, that’s immoral. When Hanes closed a factory in North Carolina and moved it to Vietnam, the spokesman said they had to do it to be “competitive.”

Bull. They did it for more profit, for more wealth for the company. They had the choice to be good capitalists or bad capitalists and chose the dark side. They could have become the “good guy underwear people,” but they didn’t.

A historic parallel took place in the South in the 19th century. With the cotton boom in the 1790s, it didn’t make a lot of sense to industrialize like the rest of the world. But they didn’t have to do it with slaves. Growing cotton meant vast new land use and thousands more workers.

They could have used paid labor by free people. Why didn’t they? Because slavery brought MORE WEALTH. They could have been wealthy, but they wanted great wealth. So they imported more and more slaves until the 1808 ban and then bought from non-cotton-growing states.

Sociologist Max Weber, who wrote “The Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capital-

ism” over 100 years ago, said that Protestant capitalism was not simply the accumulation of capital and the love for wealth, but capitalism was “a rationalist capitalistic organizing of free labor.” Organizing labor efficiently. Yes! Unfortunately, this spiritual component of capitalism, where business is “rich toward God,” is all but lost today.

For one thing, Weber says capitalism from its beginnings needed and got stable rules of operation. Rules! Yes! But today in America, we hear every day that regulation of big business is itself wrong.

Corporations don’t want any restraint on their activity. If they can make a bunch of money doing something, they want to be able to do it, no matter if it’s in the best interests of their employees and society or not.

When one corporate CEO was asked

by CNBC’s Jim Cramer where he wanted changes made, the CEO said the National Labor Relations Board — the independent body that investigates claims of unfair labor practices — and the Environmental Protection Agency.

I ask: Is this the country we want, where big corporations are free to do as they wish with their employees and pollute as they wish? No, it’s not. It must not be. This is immoral capitalism. Excessive greed must be held in check, and this is an appropriate role for government. .

Think about it. General Electric made

$14 billion in profits last year–$5 billion in the U.S. – and paid ZERO TAXES. So what do they do? Last summer they announced they will move their x-ray business from Waukesha, Wisconsin, where it has been for 115 years, to Beijing, China. .

Businesses should be held accountable to the “triple bottom line” (see Wikipedia article) of Profit, People, Planet. In this concept a business is responsible not just to shareholders for profit but to STAKEHOLDERS — that is, anyone who is influenced by the actions of the business. This includes employees, society as a whole and future generations who will inherit the planet. Someday society will rise up and demand this.

I say we should note any politician who says he or she wants to get government out of the way so corporations can “create jobs.” Pure-bred bull. I say: Show me some morality, some loyalty, some patriotism, and then we make it easy for you.

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16 - October 2011 - Asheville Daily Planet

Faith Notes

Friday, Oct. 7

HIGH HOLIDAY SERVICES, 5:30 p.m., Sacred Heart Church, 100 Brian Berg Lane, Brevard. The Brevard Jewish Community will observe High Holiday Services, Kol Nidre.

Saturday, Oct. 8

YARD AND BAKE SALE, 7-11:30 a p.m., Grace Lutheran Church, 6th Ave. W., Hendersonville. The church will host a yard and bake sale.

FLEA MARKET, 8 a.m.-1 p.m., Grace Episcopal Church, Merrimon Avenue, Asheville. The church will host a flea market.

YOM KIPPUR,10 a.m., Silvermont Senior Center, 364 E. Main St., Brevard. The Brevard Jewish Community will observe Yom Kippur, followed at 5:30 with a concluding service and “break the fast..”

FALL FESTIVAL, 4-7 p.m., East Asheville United Methodist Church, 48 Browndale Rd., Asheville. A fall festival will feature a poor man’s dinner for a $5 donation, a silent auction and baked goods.

Sunday, Oct. 9

KIRKIN, 8:30 and 11 a.m., Brevard-Davidson River Presbyterian Church, 249 E. Main St., Brevard. A Kirkin of the Tartans will be held.

STUDY GROUP, 11 a.m., Mountains Branch Library, Lake Lure. Heidi Peck will lead a Science of Mind Study Group, beginning on Oct. 9. There also will be a silent meditation at 10 a.m.

ANNIVERSARY PROGRAM, 11 a.m., Asbury MemorialUnitedMethodistChurch,171Beaverdam Road (off Merrimon Avenue), Asheville. A service will be held at 11 for the church, founded on Oct. 11, 1801, featuring Bishop Larry Goodpaster as guest speaker. A luncheon will follow at the church.

ANIMAL BLESSING, 2 -4:30 p.m., gazebo, Lake Lure. A Blessing of the Animals will be held in an inter-congregationalservice.Participantsareaskedto contribute three to five cans of cat or dog food, or one bag of 3.5-10 lbs. of old towels or newspapers, for litter, all to be donated to the Rutherford County Humane Society and Community Pet Center.

CONCERT, 4 p.m., Central United Methodist Church, Church Street, downtown Asheville. The Blue Ridge Orchestra will perform works by Tchaikovsky, Stravinsky and others. Admission is $15 for adults and $5 for students.

Tuesday, Oct. 11

PRESENTATION, 7 p.m., The Lutheran Church of the Good Shepherd, Fisher Road, Brevard. Ted Schick will present a program on “Artificial Intelligence and What It Means To Be Human.”

Friday, Oct. 14

SOCIAL JUSTICE FILM, 7 p.m., Unitarian Universalist Church of Asheville, 1 Edwin Place, Asheville.

The film “Gasland” will be screened. The documentary takes a look at the largest domestic natural gas drilling boom in history that has swept across the nation, which has resulted in thr technique of “fracking.” Admission is free. A discussion will follow the film screening.

Saturday, Oct. 15

FALL BAZAAR, 8 a.m.-4 p.m., Grove Stone Bap-

Congregation Beth Israel Annual Rummage Sale has been scheduled!

Come check out the low, low prices on electronics, household items, clothing, books, toys, tools, furniture and more.

Great holiday gifts for the whole family!

Shop early for the best bargains and selections!

Sunday, Oct. 30, 2011 and Monday, Oct. 31, 2011 8 a.m.-3 p.m. (both days) at

Congregation Beth Israel 229 Murdock Avenue, Asheville, N.C.

(make right at light after Luella’s BBQ on Merrimon Avenue)

North Asheville

tist Church, 1568 Grove Stone Rd., Black Mountain.

The church will host a fall bazaar, including arts, crafts, baked goods, food and more available for purchase. The event is a fundraiser for Operation Christmas Child shoeboxes.

CAR-TRUCK-MOTORCYCLE SHOW, 10 a.m.2p.m., Snow Hill United Methodist Church, 4 Snow Hill Church Rd., Candler. The church will host its 5th annual car-truck-motorcycle show. The cost is $10 to register a vehicle. Features include 50-50 tickets, food, bake sale, prizes and music.

FALL FESTIVAL, 10 a.m.-3 p.m., Groce United Methodist Church, 954 Tunnel Rd., Asheville. The church will host a fall festival, featuring music by Honey Hollow and others, clogging, storytelling, dancing, face-painting, a bounce house, a bake sale and free hot dogs.

FISH FRY, 4-7 p.m., Local Grove Baptist Church, 330 Locust Grove Rd., Weaverville. The church will host a fish fry, with a $5 suggested donation.

DINNER, 5-7 p.m., Montmorenci United Methodist Church, Candler The church will hold a community fellowship dinner, featuring roast beef or grilled chicken, sides, bread and dessert. Donations will benefit the ministries of Montmorenci men.

Sunday, Oct. 16

HOMECOMING, 11 a.m., Mills River Presbyterian Church, 10 Presbyterian Church Rd., Mills River.

The chuch will hold a homecoming, with music by Sneak Preview. Lunch will follow the service.

BENEFIT CONCERT, 2 p.m., Unity Center, 2041 Old Fanning Bridge Rd., Mills River. The musicians of Unity will interpret a variety of style of classical music from the past to the present. Tickets are $12 in advance and $15 on the day of the show. For reservations, call 684-3798.

CONCERT, 6 p.m., Ridgeway Baptist Church, 525 Old U.S. 19/23, Candler. The group Balsam Range will peform bluegrass music.

Wednesday, Oct. 19

ALCOHOLISM PROGRAM, 7 p.m., Unity Center, 2041 Old Fanning Bridge Rd., Mills River. Suka Chapel-Horst will lead a program on “The Real Cause of Alcoholism and Other Addictions.” She will discuss Reward Deficiency Syndrome, which is an inherited, genetically caused deficiency in brain chemistry. RDS is the underlying cause of all addictions, including alcohol, drugs, medications, food, sex, gambling, shopping, and extreme sport addictions, she said. A love offering will taken.

Tuesday, Oct. 25

DISCUSSION SERIES, 6:30-8:30 p.m., Unity Center, 2041 Old Fanning Bridge Rd., Mills River. A discussion series on “Help Create a World Beyond War” will be held on five consecutive Tuesdays through Nov. 22.

Wednesday, Oct. 26

FALL FESTIVAL, 5:30-7:30 p.m., Calvary Baptist Church, 531 Haywood Rd., Asheville. The church will host a fall festival.

Sunday, Oct. 30

RUMMAGE SALE, 8 a.m.-3 p.m., Congregation Beth Israel, 229 Murdock Ave., Asheville. The synagogue will host a rummage sale, which will be held Oct. 30-21.

Asheville Daily Planet — October 2011 — 17

18 - October 2011 - Asheville Daily Planet

When thrill of chase subsides

My wife of three years complains that I’m not romantic anymore. In the beginning, I did romantic stuff all the time. I still love her very much, but I guess I’m subconsciously reacting to the fact that I’ve nabbed her forever. (There’s definitely something to be said about “the thrill of the chase.”) How can I let her know I still care?

— Comfortably Wed Your wife could be a mix of Angelina Jolie, Madame Curie and Sue Johanson (the cute little old lady sexpert from TV), and the thrill of the chase would probably still give way to the thrill of pretending to listen to what she’s saying while you’re watching the game.

You can try to keep the romance alive with some therapist looking disapprovingly down her bifocals at the two of you — or with the gift of a 50-cent purple plastic chimp. The chimp, happily, will not ask you to “own your feelings” or repeat awkward “I” statements. Of course, the chimp could also be a toy pig, a chocolate dog or some celebrity’s toenail clippings. I happen to have a thing for chimps, so my boyfriend gives me chimp thingiedoos. The point is to extend yourself in ways that give your partner a little lift even though you no longer need to chase her (you just reach over in bed and give her a gentle shake so she’ll stop snoring like an old wino).

Doing nice little things for each other regularly is the romantic version of car maintenance to keep you from ending up broke-down in Scarytown. A 2010 study tracking 65 couples by psych prof Sara B. Algoe found that a partner’s little thoughtful actions led to feelings of gratitude in the recipient partner, which led to both partners feeling more connected and happier with their relationship the following day. Algoe and her colleagues speculated that “moments of gratitude can act like ‘booster shots’ for the ongoing relationship.” Previous research by Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky (detailed in “The How of Happiness”) suggests that two of the most effective ways to increase a person’s overall happiness are feeling grateful and doing thoughtful things for others, so yes … the key to both a happier marriage and a happier life could be the occasional checkout line impulse item.

The husband you don’t want to be is the neglectful one with the miserable, angry wife he tries to placate with occasional seismic gifting — waiting until their anniversary and going bankrupt buying a diamond tennis bracelet or hiring the Three Wise Men to drop by her office with gifts of frankincense and myrrh. His wife knows very well what his gifts are: remedial romancing — a peace offering instead of a love offering. The wiser approach is replacing the thrill of the chase with the thrill of making your wife happy by being regularly attentive: Hug her and tell her she’s beautiful. Change her windshield wipers without being asked (you care about her safety!).

Slip out of work to get her a cupcake (at 3 p.m. on a Thursday, her happiness was important to you). Every now and then, mix the little things up with all that stuff guys do early on — stuff like sending flowers after sex, not sneaking out after your wife falls asleep and then avoiding your favorite bar for two weeks so you won’t run into her.

Soldier trying to cope with a girl with ‘wait’ problem?

I met a really great girl before deploying to Iraq. We’ve gotten as close as two people can while physically separate, but she is sexually frustrated to the

The Advice Goddess

Amy Alkon

max and wants to have an unemotional hookup. She suggests we each have a “last fling” before we start our relationship (when my deployment ends in 60 days). Well, I’m in an-all-male unit, and when I’m home, I want to be with her.

She’s attending a wedding this weekend (single guys, hotel rooms, open bar, etc.).

She says not to worry, but I know how much she wants this. I just fear that any hookup she had might stick in my mind and keep me from giving her my very best. How can I encourage her to hang on a little longer? Barring that, how do I get okay with this?

— Fraught Oh, yay. You, too, are allowed a last fling. And lucky you, you’ve got your pick of a bunch of big, dusty, sweaty men in camouflage pants. There’s no open bar, but there is an open desert, stocked with a variety of IEDs. Luckily, this doesn’t stop groups of young single females from wandering past the base, but the old bearded goatherd urging them on with a stick surely frowns on interspecies hookups.

Probably many readers’ first thought is, “Jeez, the guy’s off in a war zone. Can’t Miss Ants In Her Panties keep her legs crossed for another 60 days?” The truth is, maybe not, no matter what you say. The question is, can you deal? It may help to understand why you feel so threatened.

Your feelings go way back, and I mean way. Like 1.8 million years, to genetic adaptations that helped our male forebears guard against paternity uncertainty. Today, figuring out who a kid’s daddy is just takes a DNA test, and birth control can eliminate the question entirely. These vintage genes of ours are the problem. We’re wandering around the latter part of 2011 biologically and psychologically calibrated for life in the Stone Age, and complex cognitive adaptations like “Yo, DNA! In 1951, Carl Djerassi invented The Pill!” take hundreds or thousands of generations to get wired in.

It might help to recognize that sex isn’t special — or isn’t necessarily special.

Insects have sex, and not because one particular bug means more to them than any other, but because the urge to get it on is just one of many physical urges of living critters, like the urge to eat lunch. Yeah, okay, on a realistic note, you’d probably feel a lot less hurt and threatened if she were talking about some guy at the wedding slipping her a roast beef sandwich.

Still, assuming there’s no pregnancy, disease, or continued attachment, yesterday’s sex act is no more relevant than yesterday’s lunch. What gives it relevance is the importance you decide to place on it. Can you see this hookup as something she just needs to check off her single-girl bucket list? Or, will you preserve whatever happens like a fossil in amber, poisoning your potential future together with a neverending symposium on a tiny bit of her past?

To start fresh together, it’s probably wise to have a “what happens at the wedding stays at the wedding” policy. This way, you’ll lack the details (if any) to make a dirty little movie you can run on a loop in your head -- which may keep you from making the mistake so many jealous men do: turning their woman’s forgettable drunken hookup before they were even a couple into the most unforgettable sex she’s ever had.

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Asheville Daily Planet — October 2011 — 19

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20 -October 2011 - Asheville Daily Planet