Meet Me at the SLC! The Lane Student Life Center

By Jennifer Turner, Editor & Director of Content

When the Lane Student Life Center opened in October, it achieved a long-planned goal of creating a central location for Ashley Hall’s already robust signature programming in wellness, college counseling, and student life. Although limited by the ongoing challenges of the pandemic, the Center quickly exhibited how well the School’s Department of Student Life has continued to fulfill its crucial role of serving students’ needs.

Offering 6,000 square feet of repurposed space for students in ninth through twelfth grades, the Lane Student Life Center (SLC) seeks to meet students’ needs by gathering under one roof critical services and guidance opportunities. “We know that in order for true learning to occur and to have a healthy campus life overall, it is vital to address the mental health and the social-emotional needs of our students,” said Upper School Counselor Katie Neighbours. “Having a space dedicated to these needs prioritizes these important aspects of student life.” The SLC features a wellness classroom, a café, administrative and counseling offices, additional classroom space, and areas designated for collaboration, study, socializing, and movement. Although pandemic health and safety policies have required some of these offerings to be gradually phased in, Upper School students have already come to appreciate the building’s unique purpose.

“This year’s seniors are very intent on spending as much time on campus as possible and have really taken to all areas of the SLC,” said Dean of Students Kelly Sumner. “I think they feel safe and supported as well as valued and heard in this building. They know it is a place where they can have so many needs met as well as a place to just seek solace in the café or with a trusted adult.” In addition to prioritizing opportunities for mentoring and relationship building, the center is also the place where students make plans for their future. “We are better able to help our girls understand that the development of all aspects of their lives will best direct them in their college choices,” said Director of College Counseling Amanda Murrell. “The SLC will encourage conversations that explore how all aspects of our lives are intertwined.” “ I love the study rooms and the ambiance of the first floor. I think it is a mentally happy space for being productive and also spending time with friends. —RUBY SLOAN ’21 ”

| L-R: Sarah Marshall, Kitty Goldman, Ruby Sloan, and Grayson Brewer, Class of 2021, chat over coffee in the SLC. Photo by Meredith Frazier

Members of Ashley Hall’s Department of Student Life recently shared how their work has adapted in response to the many challenges of the pandemic and how they are helping students thrive in a time of stress and anxiety.

“Looking back at an old appointment calendar, it was three years ago, almost to the day, that Mrs. Muti and I met with an architect to share a vision for a new student center on campus. With the opening of the Lane Student Life Center (SLC), we are thrilled and grateful to so many to see this vision become a reality for our community. Ashley Hall has long been committed to health and wellness as a core component of the student experience; our wellness programming is founded on the belief that a student’s social-emotional learning is crucial to her ability to advance in her academics, athletics, arts, and career aspirations and to lead a fulfilling life, developing into the person she is meant to be. The design of the SLC was to provide a central place for information, community building, support, and sustenance. This repurposed ‘addition’ to campus includes communal areas, study rooms, multipurpose classrooms, a wellness studio, a dedicated student leadership work space, a small café, and the offices of devoted student support personnel (Dean of Students, Director of College Counseling, Director of Student Affairs, the Upper School Administrative and College Counseling Assistant, and the Upper School Counselor), all intentionally designed to support and positively impact the growth and development of adolescents.

By creating a space that emulates a college campus student union, the SLC will offer opportunities for student independence, self-regulation, and agency, providing instances whereby our girls develop and hone decision-making and time management skills. Our café will utilize a point of sale system linked to the student ID cards of ninth through twelfth graders, helping prepare them for the ‘one card’ system used in many colleges. We visualize time for reflection, relaxation, and mindfulness with yoga, meditation, or exercise in a multipurpose wellness studio and chances to commune with friends and classmates in the banquette style seating or the standing desk computer charging stations in the SLC’s commons area. Ultimately, our hope is that this space fosters a sense of belonging for our students, allows them to feel both cared for and independent, and gives them the tools they need to flourish and become the best version of themselves. We believe every student

can discover ways to find the professional or peer support she needs for selfknowledge and self-care. Through this kind of agency, she also learns how to be accountable for her decisions and how to practice the critical skills she needs to cultivate inner strength and resilience.

The vision for this renovated space was conceived before the arrival of a global pandemic. Despite our thoughtful design process, we did not anticipate what protocols a pandemic would require.

We are making necessary adjustments to ensure the building can be used both purposefully and safely, while still honoring its intended users: our students!

Perhaps now, even more than ever before, the health and wellness of our students are of utmost importance, and the literal and figurative space to allow them to practice the skills needed in today’s world in the safe and supportive environment of the SLC will be a most welcome and compelling addition to our campus.” 3 WAYS THE LANE STUDENT LIFE CENTER WILL HELP STUDENTS Thrive

I think the café is going to be a big hit with the students. I love the open design of the commons area, which will encourage collaboration and fellowship, and I am excited that our student leadership will have their own space for the first time.

Having the Upper School Counselor, College Counselor, Dean of Students, and Director of Student Affairs all in one building together will give the students the most support possible. The reason we all get into education is to spend time with students, to support their growth and development, and to learn from them along the way. This building is just an avenue toward making that possible.

As the only independent girls’ school in South Carolina, we know that a singlegender school provides more leadership opportunities and an environment of female mentoring that cultivates confidence. This space will certainly enhance that.

10 WAYS TO MAINTAIN Calm WHEN APPLYING TO COLLEGE DURING A PANDEMIC

The internet can be your friend. Use online resources, such as tours and webinars, as much as possible.

Amanda Murrell Director of College Counseling

“We miss having students sitting on the couch in our office and chatting. However, in terms of working individually with students, thanks to the wonders of technology, little has changed. My days are filled with Google Docs and Zoom meetings, but I can see the girls without masks when we meet, so that’s a plus for me! All our college visits also have been virtual this year, but we have been the beneficiary of some visits that we wouldn’t have had in the past because of travel limitations. We’ve had representatives from international schools schedule visits, as well as a greater number reaching out from schools in California.

The greatest challenge for me is that many of our seniors have not been able to visit a lot of college campuses. Virtual tours and conversations with college representatives are useful, but our students are accustomed to being able to travel to see campuses in person. The silver lining is that the girls seem to be willing to look at schools that wouldn’t have been on their radar otherwise. They are attending virtual open houses and other online programming and learning about colleges that appeal for all of the right reasons, whether it is the mission of the school or academic opportunities.

The new building is a wonderful gathering place for everything student-related. Having Student Life and College Counseling under the same roof makes great sense because our worlds overlap so much. I look forward to having the café open and enjoying some time with our students in a relaxed, collegial atmosphere.” Use who you know. Reach out to family, friends, and Ashley Hall alumnae to talk about their specific college experiences.

Applying isn’t attending. Apply to a broad range of schools. They might all appeal for different reasons, but that’s ok early in the decision-making period.

Only consider Early Decision if you really want a school. Don’t let panic drive your choice. If you need to wait, wait. The right school will be there for you.

Remember that your parents want to help. All suggestions and offers of help are made out of love and concern. Don’t forget that.

Show discretion. You don’t need to share every detail of your application search with your friends.

Beware of unsolicited advice. See above. Remember that not everyone you meet is an expert on a particular college or on getting into college.

Trust yourself. You know what matters to you. Listen carefully to that voice when you are choosing the schools on your list and when you are applying.

Don’t obsess about college. It can be hard not to, but the year moves quickly, and there are lots of high school things you will be doing for the last time. Remember that.

Reward yourself. Reaching the senior year of high school and applying to college are big events, regardless of the college decisions you receive. You deserve recognition for everything you have already accomplished. Well done!

Katie Neighbours Upper School Counselor

“Creating for students a ‘hub’ dedicated to meeting their (mostly non-academic) needs helps demonstrate both to students and our greater community how much we value these needs and the subsequent services provided to meet those needs. Ashley Hall is more than just a school; it is a community comprised of individuals who genuinely care about students and want them to be the most healthy and happiest versions of themselves. We are already doing so much to address the social-emotional needs of students through our ongoing Wellness programs and initiatives, and the creation of the SLC is simply a demonstration of that priority.

The consistent and continual care for students’ mental health and emotional well-being is always a priority, even more so during the pandemic. I’m not necessarily doing anything differently, other than making sure that even our distance learners know that they can continue to access mental health support even though they are not here on campus. I check-in with students via email and conduct counseling sessions via phone or video conference.

I think one of my biggest challenges has been finding ways to keep students, particularly our senior class, motivated and positive. It is normal and understandable for them to focus on the things that they are missing out on or traditions that they have been looking forward to that are now being reimagined or done differently. I want to help them reframe their disappointment and find the silver linings, but it is challenging. I think the mentality of ‘we’re all in this together’ is helpful; I seek to be an empathetic listener while also encouraging them to lean into their roles as student leaders on this campus. Regarding silver linings and innovations: I believe this pandemic has forced all of us to reexamine our priorities and values. I know that personally, I have changed some of my focus and have rethought about what really matters to me, both personally and professionally. We also have had to become more creative in terms of our campus traditions and ‘how’ we do things. If we keep our focus on the joy that comes from being together in person as a community, we are reminded that we are resilient and can overcome any obstacle.” 4 WAYS TO Support TENSE, STRESSED, OR ANXIOUS TEENS

Validate emotional experiences. Parents and other adults tend to want to problem solve as much as possible for their child; however, sometimes teens simply want an empathetic listener. Actively listening (listening to understand versus waiting for your turn to talk) and helping teens identify their emotions, while also validating those emotional experiences, can be incredibly effective in calming intense feelings while allowing teens to feel heard and understood.

During this time of many unknowns and uncertainties, providing clear communication

is helpful. Communicate with your teen as much as you can regarding upcoming events and expectations. Get their input and give choices when possible. If you really don’t know something, it’s ok to say that too. Talk through the emotions that can bubble up in uncertain, stressful, or nerve-wracking situations.

It’s fairly common for teens to lash out when they

are tense or stressed. Parents and caregivers can often be the recipients of intense emotions. When your teen is upset or if you can feel your own emotions rising, give yourself and your child permission to walk away. Taking a break and coming back to finish the conversation when the emotional intensity has decreased can lead to fewer conflicts.

Practice gratitude. It can become easy to focus on the negatives. If possible, try to actively identify three positive things every day!

Kelly Sumner Dean of Students

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WAYS ASHLEY HALL UPPER SCHOOL STUDENTS ARE STAYING Connected

MORNING MEETING: Broadcast three times a week at the end of the first block class, it offers students a chance to learn news from their division and share in some community fun.

“This year is especially challenging—as we knew it would be—and the SLC is meeting the need to provide an extra layer of comfort and care to our students. All of our students are still processing the abrupt ending of school last spring, the loss of a summer as they would have experienced it, the daily challenges of mask wearing and social distancing, and the constant worry about what the rest of the year will look like. The SLC already feels like a ‘check in’ spot—not just for business but for yourself—a place to relax a bit, unwind, and meet with the adults on campus who are helping to guide you, support you, and cheer you on.

Our current challenges are gatherings, togetherness, and space. We are supporting students by helping them to reframe their expectations and find the beauty and the joy in getting to do things traditionally, but with a twist. We have had to reimagine what we do but are committed to capturing everything in a way that still honors the spirit of the event. It is easy to get caught up in something ‘not being the same’ just because it looks different, but it can still feel the same and have the same end result, maybe even a better one!

A silver lining is realizing a true appreciation for the opportunity to be together in community; students are gaining the ability to appreciate both what they have lost as well as what they still have in a way that wouldn’t have been possible without these restrictions. Daily conversations are happening in the SLC about triumphs, struggles, plans, ideas, worries, fears, and hopes. Questions are answered, tears are shed, complaints are heard, news is shared, excitement is expressed, and visions are co-created.” TRADITIONS: We have been able to honor several cherished traditions in new ways, including tie-dying masks for Senior/Freshman week, Big Sister-Little Sister outdoor meetups, and seniors enjoying the Shell House, physically distanced of course.

HOLIDAY CELEBRATIONS: Holidays have always been a way to bring the Ashley Hall community together, and we created new ways to celebrate, including socially distanced Halloween parades, a broadcast of the Thanksgiving Assembly, and an outdoor tree for the Gift Giving Assembly to donate gifts for those in need.

ASSEMBLY PERIODS AND ADVISORY MEETINGS:

Students gather with their advisor and advisory group once a week to participate in Assembly and twice a month to eat lunch together.

COMMUNITY ACTION: Students still serve others throughout the year, but we have redefined guidelines during the pandemic to help students find ways to support non-profit organizations within the parameters of our Panther Pledge.

GRADE LEVEL MEETINGS: Eating together as a grade once a month, students meet in Davies Auditorium and often listen to music or play trivia to happily pass the time. This creates opportunities for students to develop new friendships.