On Optimal Friends Through Optical Fibers | Samuel Atkin

“I think that the odd part about it is that you can associate memories with solely just speaking and conversation instead of physical actions”

my friends list and we began queueing for another match. We played a lot over the next few days and began setting up a call in Steam to just chill and hang out during games. It turned out he was a high schooler living a mere 65 miles away from me in the same state. Eventually, he invited me to play with some of his friends and I ended up integrating myself into their group and soon, felt like I was one of the boys. They quickly became some of my closest friends, through the nature that I simply felt more comfortable being with people who I started out bonding with over a shared love and enjoyment for a specific interest. It’s been eight years and counting of a strong friendship. In writing this, I decided to ask some of those close friends of mine their thoughts on the uniqueness of our relationship. One of their responses? “I think that the odd part about it is that you can associate memories with solely just speaking and conversation instead of physical actions… also, it definitely allows people who are normally very introverted and shy to actually talk about their deeper feelings because you are talking to a screen and with others behind a screen.”

When he wrote this to me, I was reminded of the many nights we spent together discussing all aspects of our lives. I’d grown more distant since my matriculation to Binghamton, and only really popped into our Discord server occasionally over the weekends to check-in. Despite this, I still have more contact with these people I’ve never seen compared with some of my IRL friends up here on-campus. The final friend that I queried supposed that internet friendships are unique to our generation. He agreed that online relationships have a leg up over IRL ones in the sense that they begin with a shared interest. In normal face-to-face relationships, we often start out by trying to find something endearing about the other person with a series of awkward, interrogative pleasantries. We begin online knowing the other person is endearing enough for us to “friend” them and begin messaging them to deepen and expand what is already in place.

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