Asian Outlook Spring 2007 Issue #2 by Asian Outlook

Table of Contents 20

Columns 4 5

Letter from the Editor

Where is the 'China' in China Night?

by Peter Lam

by Tansy Woan

Letter from the President

by Man Fung Wong

Relationships by Dan Dan Liu

Notes From Reality The Rat Race to Equality

Panda Economics: Porn and Poop Shedding Light on Buddhism More from the Editor by Peter Lam

Poets Slam Binghamton! by Devek Singh

by Lali Ha

by Will To

by Don Sornumpol

Boys are Better than Girls?

by Katherine K. Lam

by Jarucha Jiradacharoen

by Yi Cheung

Words from the Wiser

Featured 7

China's Insatiable Monster: Piracy

Racist Love: The Model Minority Myth and Why It's Bad for Asian America

by Melissa Chan

Cover Image Provided by: http://www.piracyisacrime.com/img/press/large/generic/dvds.jpg

Staff Editor in Chief: Peter Lam Conscience Editor: David Lee Assistant Editors: Yi Cheung, Fang Fang Fu,

Will To Layout: Oliver Hansen, Jonathan Li Publicity: Andy Ye Treasurer: Jie Lin Webmaster: Yi Cheung Asian Outlook

Asian Outlook is the art, literary, and news magazine of the Asian Student Union at the State university of New York at Binghamton. Conceived and designed to challenge and reconceptualize forms of awareness of Asians and Asian Americans, it serves to protect the voice of those in the minority, whether by ethnicity, gender, or political organization. All materials contained within do not necessarily reflect the views of the editorial board. Asian Outlook reserves the right to edit submissions and to publish materials as deemed appropriate.

Conscience

Artwork by Fan Chen

First Love: A Madd Real Poem

by Kaming Cheung

by Rekstizzy tha meal plan peeimp 28

Artwork

Wednesday Aint It A Shame by Devek Singh

I Tried But Now I Am Died Pt 2 by Rekstizzy tha meal plan peeimp

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve Seen These Before by Hugo Delgado

Photography by Peter Lam

China Trip by Dan Dan Liu

Why I Am a Chinese Nationalist by Will To

A Month Away from Home by Yi Cheung

Artwork by Ronald Kim

by Hugo Delgado 30

Untitled by pcl

by Kris Lau 29

Artwork

Senioritis: A Photo Journey to Nowhere

Contributors: Melissa Chan Fan Chen Kaming Cheung Hugo Delgado Lali Ha Jarucha Jiradacharoen Ronald Kim Katherine K. Lam Kris Lau Dan Dan Liu Devek Singh Don Sornumpol Tansy Woan Man Fung Wong

by Peter Lam 16

Asian Outlook

I stared at a pile of dishes two sinks deep the Friday before the end of Easter/Passover break.. My ride decided to come back early to finish some work, much to my chagrin. I walked into my empty apartment that Friday afternoon to discover the aftermath of a particularly rambunctious potluck we had hosted over a week ago. I approached the stack of stained plates, smelly pots and spotted glasses of various sizes regretfully. The mess was a sort of monument to a great moment of triumph for me. Back around the close of the summer right before my first semester of college, a friend of mine had implanted in me such a strong sense of camaraderie and nostalgia that I was inspired to plan a final get-together for all my high school friends still in the city at the time. Unfortunately, I had misinterpreted a series of courtesy "maybes" as "sures." Needless to say, when the afternoon of the event rolled around, I came to understand the concept of the RSVP much more clearly. Since then I've avoided having anything to do with any sort of planning for any type of social event. It's an aversion I've maintained for the past four years. That all changed the Thursday before our most recent break. The staff figured it was a good idea to celebrate the release of the first issue of the semester. I thought the easiest and cheapest solution was to host a potluck at my apartment. Of course, I had my hesitations, what with being traumatized and all since my last major attempt at hosting anything; but, then again, the Editor-in-Chief's got to bite the bullet (responses like that have gotten me into so much trouble in the past). I was so paranoid that I spent a solid week planning this thing and cleaning up the apartment. Halfway into the night of the party, I found myself leaning against a wall with Yuta, our cartoonist and president of BUJA, watching over twenty of our friends and regular staff sharing laughs over the results of one of those silly paper-and-pen party games. "I wasn't expecting so many people," he said to me. I shot him a huge grin. "Neither was I." I think I was up late one night, watching "Batman Begins" for the hundredth time, when I actually thought about that line that Katie Holmes' character delivers to Bruce Wayne. It was something like "you may still be that nice kid underneath, but but it's what you do that defines you." Maybe it was sleep deprivation that would have me resort to pop-culture references to start off my last Letter, but I'd like to think it can lead to something somewhat insightful. Those types of lines have haunted

Letter from the Editor me for most of my college days, and now, at the end of my career here in Binghamton, I think I've finally developed a solid definition of who I am. My life as an editor has had a much deeper impact on me than I expected. I used to worry that I was becoming one of those kids who didn't have much beyond books, and for a while, I was when I started my life here in Binghamton. Through the past two semesters, I'd like to think that I've redefined myself - no, it's more like I finally defined myself. Last year's staff had enough faith in this kid who has never had any experience in leading anything ever and voted him the magazine's chief administrator. One year later, I've never been so proud before - not only of my work with the magazine, but the work that the staff has put in as well. I've been blessed with such a set of passionate writers that consistently produces works of incredible caliber. I've also been supported by intelligent and concerned members of the ASU and its Presidents (and ex-Presidents) who always manage to rejuvenate my efforts as a leader. And, of course, I wouldn't be able to claim any sort of accomplishment without the support of our readers and alumni. Your input has truly kept me going during those long nights of layout when I wonder if anyone even cares if we publish. On that note, I humbly submit to you this last issue of Asian Outlook during my time as Editor. The magazine has been my great achievement during my sojourn in Binghamton, and it will forever be a part of however else I end up defining myself in the years to come. In the end I did clean those dishes. No matter what kind of bizarre attachment I held to the mess, I had to do it if I ever wanted to use the kitchen again. And now that I'm about to graduate, I have to leave my personal triumphs as Editor behind me and pass the magazine onto the next pair of capable hands to lead the magazine to an even better place. There's no way to know when and how I'll be applying my efforts afterwards (I ended up ordering out after doing the dishes), but I'm learning that, no matter how endearing the chapter may be, I'll have to flip the page to finish the book. And as I finish off my last page, I thank you for all that you've done for me. You have no idea how wonderful you've made my time here. --Peter ao.editor@gmail.com

Asian Outlook

Letter from the President We live in a turbulent time where race relations are strained and repressed. The slightest spark can set off a chain reaction in this powder keg problem. The recent scandal with the radio personality, Don Imus and the Duke University fiasco opened the world to the fact that racism is not isolated to certain groups and that there is clearly a double standard between racial groups. The so called leaders of the current civil rights movement are now seen as instigators and hate-mongers and seek only to further strain relations between the masses in order to push their own agenda. When your focus is to force the question of race where it does not belong, you start losing credibility between your constituents and America as a whole. At some point, the involvement of race will take a backdoor to cases where it actually matters. As leaders, we must be careful of how we approach volatile situations and seek only to expose the truth. That is the one thing that can make or break the credibility of your work. It may be easy to take the easiest route to your goal, but the high road is what separates the true leader from the rest. During my time with ASU, I had the privilege to learn this valuable lesson that I now apply to my everyday life. I have seen how far a good leader can bring an organization and the problems weak leaders bring upon themselves. Sometimes you have to put a little effort to get to where you want to be. As I prepare to graduate from this university and find my place in the world, I reflect upon my time here with ASU. It feels weird to let go of something I believe in and love so much. No other group has brought on a sense of belonging and responsibility like it has. No other group has offered me an opportunity to make a difference in this community like it has. No other group linked me with so many interesting people within this campus. I am thankful to have been a part of something this big and great and I hope that the future leaders of this organization expand on where I leave off just as I expanded on where my predecessor left off. There is a strong student and alumni network at our disposal and all it takes is the proper leadership to guide and inspire them towards our goals. Fortunately for us we have a lot of the right people here in this school. When I graduate, I will commission into the army as a Lieutenant and will be attending the 2nd and 3rd phase of the Army Officer course. Unfortunately this means that I will not be able to come back as an alumnus for any ASU events. The memories I retain however, will keep me company in the battlefield or to wherever I may end up. I urge you all to take the opportunities I had with ASU and be a part of the difference. We may not be very influential as individuals, but collectively, we are strong. --Man Fung Wong Man Fung is the outgoing ASU president, having served as such for the last four semester.

Asian Outlook

But I can't help feeling that there has to be something there, that perhaps he is interested in me too. Am I imagining the look in his eyes when our gazes By Dan Dan Liu meet? Am I just overanalyzing things? I still hope even after he told me he has a "sort of" girlfriend that perhaps there is still a chance for us to work out. It is so easy for me to tell myself, "Maybe he will end the 'sort of' relationship soon." Or, "Maybe he's just clinging on to something that he needs to let go of." "Maybe he wants to be with me, but he just needs to sort things out." "What is a 'sort of' relationship anyway!?" Even as I write this article, I am hoping that perhaps he will read it and realize how much If you are a female and read He's Just Not That Into he wants me. You, by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo, you would have had I have always one of the following two reactions. You either had an had a knack for detecting epiphany, realizing that you finally understand how men when a guy has an interthink, or like me, you thought it was a big load of bull. The est in me. My womanly whole book basically says one thing: if a man does not bother instinct has not failed me to ask you out or go out of his way to be with you, he's just yet. But maybe it's time not that into you. Imagine how offended I felt when my to let go of my instinct. roommate gave me this book as a gift. Anyway, here is an Maybe I should take Greg excerpt from Chapter One: Behrendt's advice and just move on. Maybe I You seem to think at times that we're "too shy" or we "just got out of something." Let me remind you: Men find it very thought his book was so satisfying to get what they want. If we want you, we will find you. full of bull because I want to believe that not every It might seem simple: a man will ask you out if he guy is like that. really likes you. However, in reality, it is an incredibly diffiI want to think that Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Just Not That Into You cult concept to grasp. This is the exact situation that I am in. I this guy is just terribly shy, or was so Or hurt is by he?his last relahave a crush on a guy who I hear is shy about asking girls out. tionship that he cannot start another one yet. I want to Furthermore, he seems to have just left a relationship. Or believe that the guy I like so much feels the same way for rather, he's still in a "sort of" relationship. Apparently, he is me. in a relationship with a girl from another college who has a This doesn't mean that I believe the book is an lot of work, so he "leaves her alone." explanation for all relationship probI guess I just don't understand lems, as it suggests. The book is just the situation. I know that if I had a a wake up call for the many women relationship with a guy from another (including myself) out there: if a school, no matter how much work I man is not making the effort to sathad, I would never want him to "leave me isfy you, then you can find someone alone." I don't care how much work I have, else that does. Maybe this boy is indeed I will still have time to call him to whisper good night as I interested in me, or maybe he is just not that into me. drift off into sleep, or tell him about my awful day. I would Perhaps he said he was in a "sort of" relationship to get have him come visit me. We can even do our work together. I me off his back. Regardless of the reason why he said would just want to be in the same room as him and sneak a that, or what he meant by it, or whether or not he likes peek at him every so often. So does this guy really have a me back, I need to find someone else that can show me "sort of" relationship, or did he make that up to get me off his this explicitly. One great point that the book did make back? My friend declares this a relationship in "hibernation," was that there is definitely someone out there for you that or one that is "parked there and not moving." Is that the type is willing to show that he cares for you. That is the sort of of relationship he claims to be in? My gut feeling asks, "Who optimism that one must keep alive. would willingly be in such a relationship?" However, my natIn conclusion, if you are in a situation where you ural instinct is to believe in what he says. Some people call need to get someone off your back, don't say, "sort of." this behavior gullible, but I prefer to call it trust in humanity. That is absolutely the most ambiguous term to describe a I believe him, and I respect that he has a "sort of" girlfriend, relationship. --Dan Dan is our monthly relationship columnist. so I retreated.

Please Don't Say "Sort Of"

But I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t help feeling that there has to be something there...

Asian Outlook

pupils that resemble those of a cat rather than other spread attention they deserve in the media. This is true bears, whose pupils are round. Perhaps the most unique aspect of the panda not only in the United States but in Asia as well. is that they served as ambassadors of sorts, usually However, we occasionally hear news of animals miracborrowed from China for a large sum of ulously being saved or members of rare money. Giant pandas not only serve as species being born. One such animal an unofficial symbol of China but that defies all odds is the panda these beloved creatures have been because it is not only a celebrity on crucial in international politics. Yahoo news but worldwide as well. Starting in the 1960s, "panda When baby panda Mei Lan was diplomacy" became all the rage. born in Zoo Atlanta in September 6 In 1972, Chairman Mao gave by Jarucha Jiradacharoen of last year, she became a star in her President Richard Nixon two pandas own right. There was even a naming cernamed Hsing-Hsing and Ling-Ling after emony for her based on the Chinese tradition of naming pandas 100 days after their birth. The public Nixon visited China. The pandas were seen as a sign of friendly relations between the People's Republic also had a voice in the selection of her name through of China and the United States. Recently, China has an online poll. Her name means "Atlanta Beauty" or tried to mend its relationship with Taiwan by offer"Beautiful Orchid." ing the island two pandas in 2005. Even though the People rejoice when a panda Taiwanese public wanted to accept the gift, Prime is born since the female becomes pregnant only once a year and have very few offspring. Minister Frank Hsieh stated that he would not However, their rate of fertility dramatically decreases because it was a sign of the One-China policy. The when they are living in captivity. The fact that they are pro-Independence groups in Taiwan have long endangered worsens the situation because it is estimat- argued for separation from China even though ed that only 1,590 of them are living in China. Genetic China views Taiwan as part of their territory. Thus, research has estimated that the total number may only in March 31, 2006, the government officially refused the pandas, on the grounds that the animals be 3,000. The rest are in zoos in the United States, were not suited to the subtropical climate of the Mexico, Germany, Austria, Japan, Hong Kong, and islands. Thailand. Despite their incredible popularity, the costs It is not surprising that these distinctive bears of maintaining pandas in zoos are staggering. The attract a great deal of attention and universal adoration. The black circles around their eyes and their play- expense for their upkeep is five times of that for an elephant. Zoos in the U.S. pay about $2.6 million ful manners make them the most popular animal in the zoo. There are even internet webcasts documenting per year to host a panda and the costs can increase their daily lives. Not many people know about the giant to $4 million when twin cubs are born. Pandas are treated like royalty when they are hosted because panda's unique characteristics, they are monitored on surveilthough. For example, they have a lance cameras, given devoted paw that consists of five fingers care by veterinarians, and and a "thumb" that helps them offered tons of bamboo and hold bamboo. Pandas also have a other treats. They are even tail that is about fifteen centimegiven plastic tubs and containters long. When raised in captivity, ers to play with. In addition, they can live for twenty to thirty each U.S. zoo is obligated to years. Although 99% of their diet is donate $1 million each year to based on bamboo, the panda is China to help protect these considered a carnivore because it rare animals and preserve also eats fish and eggs. It even eats their habitats in the mounhoney like the familiar brown bear. tainous regions of provinces The taxonomical classification of the panda has also such as Sichuan and Shaanxi. Money also goes into been hotly debated. Scientists were divided over research and education on the pandas' characteriswhether pandas were more related to the bear family tics and behavior. Loan agreements also account for or the raccoon family. Genetic testing reveals that they a large sum of money, and are a difficult process are in fact in the bear family. Strangely, pandas have

Environmental issues rarely receive the wide-

Panda Economics: Porn and Poop

Asian Outlook

with many hurdles. Nowadays, the host country must show that pandas will actually benefit from the visit and not serve as merely revenue generators for the zoo.

Recently, interesting news have been appearing online regarding pandas. Researchers at the Chengdu Giant Panda Breeding Base in Sichuan are currently trying to convert panda excrement into high quality paper; the only problem is finding a paper mill that will conduct the business. The forty pandas in the base are producing two tons of poop a day. There is no doubt that it can get very smelly after a week if the waste is not removed. Surprisingly, this is not a new idea since Thailand has been producing multicolored paper from the waste of Chuang Chuang and Lin Hui whose home is in Chiang Mai Zoo. The process is rather complicated and includes boiling the waste in soda solution, bleaching, and sun drying. One may be puzzled at the concept of using paper made from an animal's excrement. Researchers in China, however, stated that people won't be able to tell what the paper is made of, much less smell the source material. This creative idea is both beneficial to the environment and the pandas themselves. Paper from panda poop can

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The forty pandas in the base are producing two tons of poop a day. There is no doubt that it can get very smelly after a week.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; reduce the problem of disposing a lot of waste and it will also help generate more funds for the conservation of these adorable animals. One must wonder, though, what the texture of the poop paper would be.

Even though the panda population in captivity has increased by the birth of Tai Shan and Su Lin in 2005 and Mei Lan in 2006, pandas still face a serious threat in the wild. Zoo officials in Thailand tried to get Chuang Chuang and Lin Hui to produce a cuddly cub. To expedite the reproduction process, Chuang Chuang was actually shown panda porn on television to teach him how to mate, with the expectation that he will replicate the techniques he has seen onscreen. First, zoo officials only showed him images, but it was quickly discovered that he paid more attention when sounds were included. In addition, Chuang Chuang needed to lose weight because he was too heavy to mate with his partner. After being placed on a low-

carb diet, he lost seven pounds. Despite the stimulation, Chuang Chuang didn't seem too eager to consummate his marriage (the couple was given a wedding ceremony). Panda porn failed to help Chuang Chuang mate, forcing researchers to resort to artificial insemination. The process was used for the first time in Thailand although Chinese breeders have successfully done it in the past. These days, pandas are acting more like humans with their dieting, porn watching, and superstar treatments. However, we need to keep in mind that pandas are not the only endangered animals that need our attention. There are many other species whose survival is threatened because of human actions. The habitats of polar bears and penguins, for example, have rapidly declined due to the effects of global warming. The case of the giant panda serves as a high-profile reminder that the planet does not belong to us alone but is shared by all living organisms. References "China's Panda Ambassadors." <http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asiapacific/4508873.stm>. "Forget Panda Porn: Breeders Try Last Resort." <http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17920434/>. "Panda Bear." <http://www.bearplanet.org/pandabear.shtml>. "Panda, Inc." <http://www7.nationalgeographic.com/ngm/0607/feature1/>. "Panda Poop to Be Used As Raw Material." <http://biz.yahoo.com/ap/070326/ odd_ panda_poop.html?.v=1>. "Taiwan "Unlikely" to Want Pandas." <http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/ 4594452.stm> "Thai Panda Gets Daily Dose of Porn." <http://au.news.yahoo.com /070326/21/ 12vy7.html>. "Voters in Online Naming Poll Selected "Mei Lan"." <http://www.zooatlanta.org/ zoo_news_panda_mei_lan.htm>.

Asian Outlook

Shedding Light on Buddhism

Before his Enlightenment, the Buddha practiced extreme asceticism, which eventually reduced him to skin and bones. The five ascetics in the background would eventually become his first five disciples.

By Don Sornumpol

The religion of Buddhism is still commonly viewed as an "Asian" or "Eastern" religion. Although there has been strong interest in Buddhism by Westerners in the past century, this is greatly offset by the degree of ignorance that still exists. For example, a common misconception that stubbornly persists is that the historical Buddha is the same person as the jolly, obese Chinese folk god, "Laughing Buddha" or Budai even though the two are totally unrelated.1 Even vast numbers of Asian Americans, who variously follow Christianity, Islam, ethnic Buddhism, atheism, or agnosticism, are largely ignorant of Buddhism proper. Therefore, the purpose of this article is to shed light on the religion, dispel some common misconceptions and also to clarify certain aspects of Buddhist doctrine (i.e. the dhamma or dharma.) Hopefully, this article will inspire Asian Outlook

interested readers to properly research the religion on their own and will foster a greater degree of inter-faith understanding and harmony, especially in the Asian American community where no single religious faith dominates the entire population. 2

[A few notes before proceeding: those Mahayana Buddhists who read this article will realize that it is somewhat biased towards Theravada Buddhism. I apologize for that but I have tried as hard as I can to merely reflect the "basics" common to both sects. Also, the foreign words used to describe Buddhist terms in this article are in Pali, followed by Sanskrit in parenthesis where applicable.] 9

Q: So, the Buddha isn't that jolly, obese guy I see whenever I go to a Chinese restaurant? A: No, he isn't. The historical Buddha or the Buddha Shakyamuni was not at all overweight. In fact, when he practiced asceticism before His Enlightenment, the Buddha was reduced to skin and bones, on the verge of starvation due to his practice of eating a single grain of rice per day. 3 The Buddha was born as Siddhattha Gotama and hailed from the Sakya country (located in present day Nepal). His father was chief of the Sayka confederacy, but Siddhattha renounced the life of royal luxury to pursue a spiritual journey. The Buddha carried out his ministry throughout northeastern India. In the Lakkhana Sutta (sutra or discourse), he is described as having an athletic figure, blue eyes, and curly hair 4 contrary to usual depictions. The misconception is most likely due to the procedure that all bhikkhus (Buddhist monks) shave their heads.

followers from idolizing him, but said that to truly "worship" him, all one had to do was to practice his teachings. 6 However, it is fair to say that if forms of devotion to the Buddha encourage one to practice the dhamma, then all for the better. It is only important that this devotion should not fully replace the practice and proper understanding of the actual dhamma.

Lay Buddhists making the traditional offerings of flow-

Q: Why do I always see Buddhists worship ers, incense and candles in Wat Phra Kaeo (the most sacred Buddhist temple in Thailand). Buddha as if he were God? Buddha did not claim to be a God. Q: What exactly is the dhamma (dharma)? A: It is a form of devotion for Buddhists to show A: Dhamma has two separate but related connotarespect to their teacher, the Buddha. Therefore, Buddhists do not literally worship the actual statue tions. It refers to the whole of the Buddhist doctrine but it also refers to "the way things are." or depiction of Buddha itself. Nor do Buddhists really attribute any sort of "prayer" aspect to their Buddhists believe that the Buddha did not "worship" of Buddha. (However, it is true that folk expound a set of beliefs, but that his doctrine merely reflects how life actually works. Therefore, Buddhists do pray to Buddha to some extent.) the relationship between the Buddha and the When Buddhists display devotion to an image of Buddha, it is really done out of respect for him and dhamma is analogous to Isaac Newton and gravity or Benjamin Franklin and electricity. The to encourage the heart and mind to have faith in Buddha did not propose any sort of beliefs but and practice his teachings. Therefore this act of really discovered the underlying principles that "worship" is to be understood as a symbolic gesture and an auxiliary practice to the "real" practice govern all sentient life. Those principles are: Life is unsatisfactory and stressful. Life of the dhamma. The offerings of flowers represent (1) means suffering. morality, incense represents mental discipline and (2) The cause of this suffering and stress is candles represent the "clear vision of wisdom."5 due to the attachment, clinging and crav Those three faculties are to be developed by the ing for sensual desires, for things that are Buddhist practitioner. When folk Buddhists offer impermanent, for things that are insub water, drink or fruit to a Buddhist shrine, it is not stantial. In other words, things are always to be misconstrued as offerings to pacify a god, but changing. As soon as we find some meas it is merely meant to encourage generosity and ure of happiness and freedom in our lives, deter sensual craving in the devotee (this detterthings are bound to change sooner or ence is central to Buddhist teachings). It is recordlater. ed in the Mahaparinibbana Sutta that on his deathbed, the Buddha discouraged his 10 [Photographer: Laughlin Elkind, http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/ Asian Outlook

(3)

There is an end to suffering and stress. In other words, there is ultimate salvation, which almost all religions propose to its followers. It is not death, but it is not nec essarily "heaven" either. (4) The way to the end of suffering and stress is through the Noble Eightfold Path: right view, right intention, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right mindfulness and right concentration. This Noble Eightfold Path is centrally important and worth elaboration, but I will move on for the sake of brevity. 7 The Buddha originally referred to the religion he founded as "Dhamma-Vinaya" or the "Doctrine and the Discipline." 8 Other names for Buddhism are "Buddha-Dharma" and "Buddha-Sasana" (literally, "Buddhist religion"). Q: But how does Buddhism explain the "big questions"? What is the origin of the universe? How will the universe end? Is there a God? How did existence, as we know it, come to be? A: The Buddha answered such questions with the "Arrow Parable" 9 of which, I will provide an updated version. Let's say you're walking down the street of a dangerous neighborhood late at night. Suddenly, you are mysteriously struck and severely wounded by a gun shot. There are two different types of questions that you may now ask yourself. The first type of questions is this: Who shot me? Why did he shoot me? What did he look like? Where did he come from? What kind of gun was he using? What company manufactured the gun he was using? But you realize that it's useless and ridiculous to ask these questions because you'll die from the wound before you ever find the answers. Instead, it's more worthwhile to ask: Where is the nearest hospital? How can I get there? Is there a doctor or nurse around? How can I stop the bleeding until I find proper medical assistance? You can spend your whole life wondering the origin of the universe, whether or not there is a God, or the meaning of existence. But you'll die before having learned the answer. Instead, you should be asking how one can get to the nearest hospital, or rather, how one can stop this cycle of suffering caused Asian Outlook

by birth and death. Q: So then Buddhists believe in reincarnation? Why does reincarnation happen? How does it work? A: The Buddha explained the cycle of suffering, of birth and death through the doctrine of "dependent origination" or paticca-samupadda10: ignorance causes mental formations, mental formations causes consciousness, consciousness causes name and body, name and body causes the six senses (including mind), the six senses causes contact, contact causes feeling, feeling causes craving, craving causes clinging, clinging causes becoming, becoming causes birth, birth causes aging, sickness, despair, sorrow and death. I realize how abstract some of those terms sound, but the main idea to come away with here is that we are actually "born" before we are ever born into the womb. Becoming precedes birth. Here is a rough analogy: you get into your car and drive to the supermarket. In this particular instance, this movement to the supermarket is totally manifest in the automobile. But is movement conceivable without the car? Yes. You could have walked, you could have ridden a bicycle, you could have jumped on a flatbed truck, or hang-glided. The reality of movement precedes how it actually manifests itself. Likewise, one must cling to the five aggregates in order to become. Think of how a fire must cling to a log or the wick of a candle in order to become. In the same way does clinging and then becoming precede physical birth in the womb. Q: What are the five aggregates? A: In everyday life, we always refer to ourselves according to the five aggregates or five khandha (skandha) without even realizing it. These aggregates are: (1) the body (2) consciousness (3) perceptions (4) feelings and (5) mental formations. 11 The Buddha states that when we cling to one of those five aggregates, we suffer because we ultimately have no control over them. The easiest one to grasp is the first aggregate, the body. Supermodels are certainly people who identify with their bodies. When they look into the mirror, they say I am beautiful. But of course, they will grow old, their beauty will

ignored and we are focusing only on our breath, we become tranquil, peaceful and calm. We are as light as our breath. The successful completion of this goal is comparable to the "high" one gets when indulging in less seemly activities. Likewise, when samatha meditation ends, we "crash." The pleasure of samatha meditation cannot last indefinitely. But there is a more profound and lasting form of meditation. This is called vipassana or "insight" meditation. When practicing vipassana meditation, we are opening our minds to everything. Any sort of information or formation that enters the mind or the senses, we register and accept without personalizing it or judging it. For example, if our boyfriend or girlfriend has just broken up with us, we register the resultant hurt and pain for what it is. There is no boyfriend nor girlfriend, no I nor me. We experience the pain but do not cling to it as me or mine. It is no longer I am suffering, it is no longer he or she has caused me to suffer. It is only that there is suffering. The Q: Finally, how does goal of vipassana mediA giant 'Buddha-rupa' (or Buddha image) from Ayutthaya, meditation fit in with Thailand. It depicts the Buddha's "parinibbana" (or physical tation is to understand death). On his deathbed, the Buddha discouraged his followBuddhist practice? the mental experience as ers from idolizing him. What role does it play an impersonal series of in regards to the dhamma? mental formations. It is important to understand A: Meditation or bhavana is one of the faculties to that at every moment, we are constantly "reborn" be developed in the Noble Eightfold Path. The according to the series of thoughts that rise and most common kind of meditation that is thought of fall in our minds. Once we penetrate deeply into is samatha or samadhi. 12 This is because the impermanence of our thoughts and of oursamatha is a popular and straightforward form of selves, then we may ultimately come to realize meditation. It is the complete focus and concentra- the nature of all things, let go of it and achieve tion on a single object of meditation, usually the nibbana ("nirvana"). That is certainly an breath. This is a particularly difficult thing for abstract, distant and lofty goal. But a practical most of us to do due to the short attention span use for the practice of mindfulness is merely to that today's fast-paced society encourages. Also, it be aware of our actions at all times: mentally, doesn't help that focusing on one's breath is not a verbally and physically. In other words, we are particularly fun and exciting thing to do. But the really meditating at every waking moment of our goal of samatha meditation is that once we are lives. We meditate to consider: do our actions completely focusing on the breath, we become cause harm to another person or our self? Do our "one" with it. When all information or formations actions cause well-being for another person or from the senses and the mind are completely our self? What are the consequences of these actions? This is called kamma (karma). 12 Asian Outlook fade and their clinging to the body ultimately brings suffering. Let's say you're an Asian American person and you over hear someone say a racially insensitive comment towards Asians. You suffer immediately. First you cling to the body ("Hey! I'm an Asian!"), next you cling to your perceptions ("that person is a racist!"), next you cling to your feelings ("I am angry!"), then you cling to your mental formations ("I am going to punch that guy in the face!"), then you cling to your consciousness (you're so angrily focused on that person that you don't even see a friend waving at you). So long as you cling to the five aggregates and say that these are me ("I am angry" "I am beautiful", etc) or mine ("my desire is to punch that guy!") you are bound to suffer. A key understanding to come away with here is that these aggregates are inconstant and always changing. Our bodies grow old and our emotions change. So do those of other people. If you cannot control something, how could you ever say that it belongs to you? How could you ever say that it is you?

You do not have to be a Buddhist to practice samatha or vipassana meditation. In fact, you can be a person of any belief and practice Buddhist meditation. However, you may eventually get to a point where you realize that Buddhist insights have become incompatible with how you have always understood life. Whether or not to continue practicing the dhamma further is totally up to you. References and footnotes. [All references to Pali scripture are formatted in order of "Nikaya. Chapter number. Sutta Number." All referenced suttas appear in the Sutta Pitaka.] 1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Budai 2. http://www.asiannation.org/religion.shtml 3. "A Young People's Life of the Buddha" by Bhikkhu Silacara. Access to Insight edition © 2005 4. Digha Nikaya 13: Lakkhana Sutta. 5. "Buddhist rituals and observances" based on talks by Ajahn Sucitto and Ajahn Candasiri. Amaravati Publications © 2001 6. Digha Nikaya 16: Mahaparinibbana Sutta. 7. Samyutta Nikaya 56.11: Dhammacakkappavattana Sutta. 8. Throughout the Pali canon, the Buddha refers to his religion as the "DhammaVinaya." An example can be found in: Anguttara Nikaya 11.18: Gopalaka Sutta. 9. Majjhima Nikaya 63: Cula-Malunkyovada Sutta. 10. Samyutta Nikaya 12.2: Paticca-samupad da Sutta. 11. Samyutta Nikaya 22.79: Khajjaniya Sutta. 12. A book I recommend which touches on samatha and vipassna meditation is: "The Four Noble Truths" by Ajahn Sumedho. Amaravati Publications.

Asian Outlook

More from the Editor As if one page wasn’t enough... So I didn’t get to say all that I wanted to say in my Letter. Since I’m still the Editor-in-Chief for this last issue, I get to indulge in my writing tooth... if such a thing even makes sense. If you’ve been a loyal reader of our magazine for the past several semesters, you may have noticed several important changes. In response to reader input, we’ve introduced a good deal of consistency in the form of reappearing columns (Relationships, Letter from the President). We’ve received quite a bit of positive response from those of you who care to write us, and I’m pleased to say that we will be continuing those sections. Of course, as each year passes, the writers may change, but they will be there. This issue also sees the creation of a new section, “Notes from Reality.” Fueled by the support of AO alumni and subscribers, “Notes...” will feature submissions from former Binghamton students and AO writers describing their experiences beyond college and their thoughts on the real world. It also gives you readers an excellent networking opportunity, as a number of our alumni have entered a wide variety of industries and fields and are more than willing to share their wisdom. On that note, I’m calling for writers (both current students and alumni) interested in creating his or her own column to come to one of our meetings or to email us (ao.editor@gmail.com) your idea along with your work. Expect to be writing at least four times a year. It may seem a bit much, but it will guarantee that your unique voice will be recognized by our readers with each issue. Finally, I issue a challenge to our future editorial staff and contributors: follow up on the legacy of excellence that all our previous writers and editors have left you, and then trump us. Remind us of how much blood, sweat, and tears we’ve poured into the magazine, and show the entire community that it certainly was, and still is, worth it. Show them that we can be the “model” for others, for the right reasons this time. --Peter

Poets Slam Binghamton!

By Devek Singh

On the night of Tuesday, the 17th of April, poets Ishle Park, Taiyo Na, and Regie Cabico gave a free performance in the Old Union. Park and Cabico are well-known from HBO's Russel Simmons presents Def Poetry, and are a pretty big deal. The Filipino-American Cabico is a pioneer in spoken word performance, Artist in Residence at NYU, and gay activist. Korean-American Ishle Yi Park, touted as having "an angelic face and the soul of a rock star" is the current Poet Laureate of Queens, and has been since 2004. The younger Taiyo Na is a multi-talented poet, musician and actor. Though I would've probably went regardless, my presence was mandated by my English class; my professor, Lisa Yun, acting director of the Asian and Asian American studies program here at Binghamton, was involved in getting the event together. I was actually a little worried that the performers wouldn't show up, being the day after the blackout and the shooting. They still came, though. The room was packed and the chair shortage led to a good amount of people having to stand. The crowd seemed a little antsy as the event started half an hour late, at 7:30. Taiyo Na, whose appearance was not as publicized or advertised as the more established poets, started off the night. His head was shaved, his voice was raspy, and his clothes were baggy and casual. He had candor and genuineness in his words, and an overall affable personality. He talked about 2pac, read a few poems, picked up his guitar and sang a few songs. He strummed softly and gently as he wrenched out "Immigrant Mother," singing with passion and heart about the sacrifices his struggling single mother made to raise him. From Na's gratitude and dedication, his trueness, I think he's definitely going places. The other more established poets' gushing praise for him throughout the night sustained that thought. Ishle Park, the headliner, came out next, bubbly, with her hair in pigtails. She was very conversational and open with the audience. She gave shoutouts to Queens and Brooklyn, and began her first poem, describing

Asian Outlook

Ishle Park has good tasteâ&#x20AC;Ś in magazines.

beauty in the streets of New York, finding poetry in the everyday. Her performance was physical as much as verbal, arching back like a crescent holding the microphone so that her silhouette would have been more dramatic in front of more elaborate lighting. After a few more poems, she strapped up her guitar and sang a few songs. She did a beautiful rendition of Otis Redding's classic "These Arms of Mine" followed by an original song titled "Only." Her song covered a topic she frequented; relationships (not that she didn't mention more serious issues like domestic violence, seeing bruises on her mother). Ms. Park definitely struck me as a woman who follows her heart, follows love. The crowd joined in for her take on "Killing Me Softly" (more in the vain of The Fugees cover) and a lovely time was had by all. I was pleased that so many students knew all the lyrics, and it was definitely an experience I was not expecting. Regie Cabico came out to end the night, and, in my estimation at least, he stole the show. He came out like a sparkplug, flamboyantly spitting out hilarious anecdotes, thoughtful heartfelt poetry, and comments about life. Like the other poets, he had a strong connection with the audience; the crowd was constantly erupting with laughter or applause. His comfort on the stage definitely showed his experience and asserted his status as a sort of mentor to the younger Asian-American poets. Listening again to his performance, which I recorded in full on my cell-phone, because I like bootlegging things, I still cracked up at his pop-culture comedy and humorous relationship experiences, and I still was affected by some of his more emotional words, the last of which seemed to leave almost at the brink of tears. At the end of the night, I was glad and sincerely grateful that such amazing artists could come all the way out to nowheresville, and give us (collectively appreciative, no doubt) such an inspired show. I certainly hope to have the opportunity to see other performers of such talent and dedication visit our campus.

Asian Outlook

Where is the ’China’ in China Night? A Comment on the Apparent Decline of CASU By Tansy Woan men and helpless women who needed to be saved by CASU's annual China Night event since junior those chauvinists, because raising that issue would incite me to rant, and that is not what this article is high, but often volunteered, watched rehearsals, or lent stage props to the presiding about. CASU e-board for use. When I entered As a sophomore this year, I ran for China Night coBinghamton University, I could not wait to finally be a part of CASU and finally contribute chair to restore the tradition and legacy of China directly to the event. This year, I served as “Had I been someone who attended China Night co-chair, at least until the current China Night to truly learn about e-board kicked me out. The e-board kicked me out because we had differences of vision for Chinese and Chinese American life, I China Night. I write this article in AO to show would have thought they were a what China Night could have been like, had bunch of vapid, bikini- or NorthfaceCASU opted to promote culture rather than egos. clad mongoloids”

As a resident "Townie," I not only attended

In the past (and I have even seen China Night performances from the 1980s), the show focused on Chinese culture or even Chinese American subculture. There were always several traditional dances, from the lion dance to open the show or fan and ribbon dances. The fashion show would exhibit traditional Chinese garb and the skit would always relate back to what it means to be Chinese American today. As China Night chair, all I wanted was to uphold this legacy that past CASU e-boards had built. The current CASU e-board this year, however, could care less about tradition and legacy. No proof supports this better than the disgusting way China Night 2007 came out. Even as a freshman last year, China Night stunned me. Nothing about China Night 2006 even pretended to care about Chinese culture or spreading sociopolitical awareness of life as a Chinese American. Had I been someone who attended China Night to truly learn about Chinese and Chinese American life, I would have thought they were a bunch of vapid, bikini- or Northface- clad mongoloids who shook their asses to hip hop. I dare not even raise the issue of how last year's skit glorified patriarchal 16

Night performances that Binghamton University has long been known for, before the past few years of inept student leaders. I coordinated undergrad as well as grad-student groups who would contribute cultural performances to this year's China Night. I wrote a script for the skit portion that would raise issues of race discrimination, particularly the adverse effects of the model minority myth of Chinese Americans today. The CASU e-board immediately rejected the skit, accusing it of being "too serious." They wanted a light-hearted comedy instead. In their own words, they wanted a skit that would "make people want to party and get drunk afterwards." Throughout the year, the CASU e-board and I bumped heads on almost every point regarding China Night. They wanted me out. Thus, when I had to be in Oklahoma for a debate tournament and thus forced to miss a BSSL meeting, which was entirely beyond my own control, the CASU e-board jumped at the opportunity to use that absence as an excuse to impeach me. Even though the entire time I was in Oklahoma I had been working on finalizations to another skit I had written on my own (due to a lack of other contributing writers that they are now probably going to pass off as their own) and on the phone Asian Outlook

Chinese culture in 1998...

...and 2007

every day with performers working out last minute details in regards to their performance. Despite all the hard work, the effort, the time and energy I invested in China Night, despite it all, they wanted me out. So I left. Now I see the advertisements for China Night-huge spreads of half-naked Asian women in bikinis posing under waterfalls in the Pipe Dream. Is this really the image of the Chinese Diaspora we want to give to the general student body and faculty members here at Binghamton? From my understanding of the direction this e-board wants to take China Night 2007, there also will be little to no promotion of cultural awareness. I am fine with the MODA performance because many Chinese Americans have integrated hip hop into our subculture. Fusion dances between the traditional and modern highlight how the lore and customs our mothers, grandmothers, and great-grandmothers gave us have been transformed in America by us, Americans. Chinese Americans. However, when all the dances are entirely unrelated to our culture and when the fashion show is nothing more than a chance to objectify Asian women and further perpetuate Asian fetishes and when the skit has Asian Outlook

absolutely nothing to do with culture, then I wonder whether it becomes a joke to call this a cultural show. China Night could have been an opportunity for Chinese American students to remember their past, their history, the struggles of their forefathers that brought us here; it could have been an opportunity to pay tribute to the trailblazers who ended racial segregation, who fought discrimination, who made the Civil Rights movement an Asian American issue; in fact, it could have simply been an opportunity for all of us to sit among one another's good company and be reminded of our rich heritage and how that heritage has been infused into American culture. Sadly, none of that happened this year. It is a mockery of our community, of the money Student Association allocates to subgroups for the very purpose of promoting Chinese American culture. To be frank, if China Night next year does not distinguish itself and show the importance of celebrating the Chinese American experience, then I do not see the purpose of having a China Night at all. 17

China's InsatiableMonster: Piracy By Yi Cheung On nearly any product in the United States,

difficult to track. Pirated software, songs, and "Made in China," is a phrase more popular than movies are not being limited to stores on street any brand name out there. In turn, U.S. products corners but they are also available online. are just as popular in China, with one small twist. Furthermore, consumers are not the only ones The Commerce Department estimated that the U.S. loses about 24 billion a year due to the ram- who utilize piracy for their benefit. Seller on the street corner would not be able to compete with pant piracy and counterfeiting in China. To put that into perspective, that's about half of what Bill the business across the street that sells movies for much less. Unfortunately, selling pirated media Gates is worth. has become the rule for survival in the market. For the past decade, the U.S. has been pressuring Both Microsoft and Nintendo have expressed their China to crack down on piracy and counterfeit support with the U.S. to cut down on piracy. U.S. products. Currently, the Bush administration has placed China on the priority watch list for Microsoft anticipates that sales will increase by 20% as a result of anti-piracy. Nintendo took a poorly enforcing intellectual property rights. Within this past year, the U.S. filed World Trade more active role, providing evidence that Hong Organization (WTO) cases to hold China account- Kong, Brazil, Mexico, and Paraguay were involved in piracy. Jodi Daugherty, Nintendo of America's able for her actions and to stop piracy. In senior director of anti-piracy, stated, "We are response, Chinese officials expressed outrage, commenting that great progress has already been pleased the US government is pushing China to comply with its trade agreements in an effort to made within this past decade. protect the lifeblood of the copyright and trademark indusApparently, China's progressive tries." steps towards anti-piracy were not large scale enough. It is not The harm that piracy causes is that China has not tried, but in not limited to the U.S. market, order to attack this problem effibut it has also greatly deterred ciently, attitudes of Chinese citiChina's economy. Recently, zens must be changed. Whenever stocks in Chinese companies China promises to crack down on counterfeit items, the promise only last for a cou- have taken off; however, that is not a trend that ple of days before the day-to-day piracy activities can be continued if startup businesses lose their products and, ultimately, their livelihood to constart up again. In other words, to foreign counsumers who steal software and digital media over tries, the anti-piracy fight seems like a faรงade, the internet. As a developing economy, China's including a recent effort made by China that future relies on the success of small businesses to declared this past March 15th to be Anti-Piracy become internationally competitive. Day. Additionally, in order for piracy to come to a halt, American and Chinese officials need to attack the heart of the source - the internet. Ever since the internet became widely accessible to average individuals, piracy has become increasingly more 18

Asian Outlook

Boys Are Better Than Girls? By Lali Ha In 1994, the United Nations Population Fund and the Government of the Republic of Korea hosted a symposium to investigate a "missing girl" phenomenon in Asia. Many countries, including Mainland China, Taiwan, South Korea, and Vietnam have been showing a decreasing birthrate of female infants. Many researchers in the symposium expressed that the above mentioned nations use sex-selective abortions to prevent producing unwanted girls. Sex-selective abortions are extremely high in areas that show very strong preferences for sons. More recently, the ratio between boys to girls have been increasing in large numbers. Without any interference, such as sex-selective abortion, the sex ratio in most populations would range from 104107. In 1993, the sex ratio for males was reported to be 115.6 in South Korea and 115.4 in China. These numbers result from the deliberate abortion of female fetuses, neglect of young female infants, and female infanticide. Many have speculated that it is perhaps due to the underdeveloped social and economic natures of such countries. However, Taiwan and South Korea, two of the most developed countries in Asia are still practicing sex-selective abortion. Persistence of the "missing girl" phenomenon can be attributed to patriarchal cultures in Asia. In South Korea, for example, fathers are viewed more superior than other members of the family. In addition, women are considered as transitory members of a family - they marry and leave - whereas men can contribute to the family wealth and become heir. Parents may also favor sons more for their own emotional and financial dependencies Asian Outlook

following retirement. Routine check-ups during pregnancy such as fetal ultrasound have been used to detect the sex of fetuses in the past. It is now illegal to use prenatal sex detection and for hospital staff to reveal the sex as well. However, expectant mothers still try to work around the current laws through amniocentesis. Amniocentesis is one of the routine check-ups performed during the first trimester. The procedure involves extracting about 30 Tbsp of the amniotic fluid by inserting a needle through the belly into the uterus. This exam is done usually after the 14th week of pregnancy. Out of curiosity, I typed in "selective abortion" on a Korean search page, "daum.net." Not to my surprise, I found blogs dedicated to this very topic. Moms were sharing information on how to read the results from amniocentesis and where to find doctors who reveal the sex of fetuses to expecting couples. Personally, I think cultures that embrace these customs are immoral and selfish. Children are not necessities, trends, or toys one can just mess with. Most importantly, girls deserve the very same right and respect that boys receive from many Asian cultures. Even while girls grow up, they are still faced with judgment, stigma, and confusion. There have been many times when my relatives made me feel pretty damn insignificant. Being in a family of two girls was no fun during house parties. My grandmother always commented on the absence of a son in our 19

family. She engraved in my brain how strong, successful, and intelligent I had to be in order to make up for my parents' "misfortune." I was told not to be myself, and to act like I'm only here to fill in someone's shoes. I despise a lot of my relatives for not appreciating my existence as a girl. But that was not the end of it. One time when I was working part-time at an after-school program, I overheard a first-grader tell his younger sister, "Boys are better than girls." Oh, how nonchalantly he said that. I quickly sat in front of him and gave that boy the death glare. I thought: where did this little boy learn of such a thing! He had the balls to tell me that his grandmother taught that, not only to him but to his sister as well. I was shocked. I wanted to tell this boy off and throw him across the classroom, in hopes that he will crawl back to his sexist grandmother in tears. Not to mention a few broken bones as well. I wanted his grandmother to never corrupt him or hurt his younger sister ever again. I didn't want another girl to feel inferior growing up. A few weeks ago, I overheard a bunch of guys talk about the current situation in Asia. It seemed as if they were only worried about the stiff competition they were to face with less and less women available for them. They appeared to be jealous of how lucky women are, and how unfair it is for women to have more choices. On the flip side, female infants are being abused, abandoned, and murdered this very second. Unless one of you guys wants to switch places and have your own parents kill you, I don't think these monstrous acts qualify as being lucky. Sources: "Pregnancy - Routine Checkups." WebMD. Accessed 12 April 2007. <http://www.webmd.com/baby/tc/PregnancyRoutine-Checkups>. "Son Preference and Premature Death in Korea." The Journal of the International Institute. Accessed 12 April 2007. <http://www.umich.edu/~iinet/journal/vol4no1/son pref.html>. "Son Preference in Asia-Report of a Symposium." U.S. Census Bureau. Accessed 12 April 2007. < http://www.census.gov/ipc/www/ebspr96a.html>. 20

Racist Love: The Model Minority Myth and Why It's Bad for Asian America By Will To

Part I: Background "Virtually everything written about us today reveals our true racist value to America as a race of white right hands to hit the blacks and 'less assimilated' races in the head with." --Frank Chin, Confessions of a Chinatown Cowboy, page 108 In Asian America, all roads lead not to Rome, which has often held up as the pinnacle of Western civilization, nor does it lead to the Asia of old; instead, all roads lead to the model minority stereotype. It is a seemingly harmless, apparently beneficial (to Asian Americans, at least) perception that Asian Americans are hardworking, overachieving, and studious individuals who excel in math and science. As a result, doors in white collar businesses have opened to Asian Americans, allowing them to improve their standard of living and average income. Indeed, this tale seems to be supported by the statistics; for example, US Census figures showed that, by 1970, the median family income of Japanese and Chinese-Americans had already surpassed that of white Americans (5). Furthermore, Asian Americans are a common sight on many college campuses; at UC Berkeley, Asian students make up 41 percent of the student population (7).

Asian Outlook

Yet the Model Minority stereotype is not only false, supported by skewed and biased numbers, it is also detrimental to Asian Americans in multiple ways. This includes - but is not limited to - college admissions and government programs that were designed to aid and abet the less fortunate, and the area of race relations, where less successful groups may resent Asian Americans for having "made it", when, in actuality, Asian Americans face considerable barriers in American society today. As John Liu, former BU student, AO writer, and current New York City congressman, wrote, "in reality, the MMM is just what the third 'M' stands forâ&#x20AC;Śa myth." (8). But if this is the case, how did such a damaging, inherently untrue and unfair prejudice become accepted amongst the American population? When and why would something so blatantly false become a universal truth, believed in and adhered to by Asians and non-Asians alike? The phrase "model minority" was, as far as anyone could tell, coined by sociologist William Peterson in an article for the New York Times Magazine in January 1966; Peterson wrote about the economic success of Japanese Americans, and lauded them for not being a "problem minority" (4). Presumably, Peterson wanted to focus attention on Japanese Americans who succeeded through hard work instead of through vocalizations against the establishment, as African Americans were doing around the same time. Peterson was not alone; another article casting Chinese Americans in a similar light came out in US News and World Report almost a year later, in December 26, 1966 (4). Particularly interesting, however, would be the date of these articles, which, as mentioned before, were published in 1966. Anyone who Asian Outlook

remembers anything about American history from their grade school days would also recall that 1966 was also the height of the civil rights movement, spearheaded by Martin Luther King. The timing of these articles then, would have not been a coincidence; not only were such articles written to assuage a fearful and anxious white majority who saw racial rebellion at every turn, but these two highly significant pieces would also divide the civil rights movement. In effect, Chinese, Japanese, and later, Asian Americans, would be cut off from blacks and Hispanics. The latter deemed Asians "sell-outs" and "Uncle Toms" for their acceptance by whites, and protested against the perceived affluence and success of Asian Americans. Indeed, the story from US News and World Report was all too transparent, as it stated "at a time when Americans are awash in worry over the plight of racial minorities, one such minorityâ&#x20AC;ŚChinese Americans, [are] winning wealth and respect by dint of its own hard work." (9). Even without the causes listed above, there is yet another possible reason for the model minority myth, one that has to do with Asian immigration to the United States, and not with the constant raving about Confucianism and its emphasis on education (though that may very well be a factor). For the Asian American studies majors or minors amongst us, recall the 1965 Immigration Act, the piece of legislation which undid previous unequal legislation regarding Asian immigrants (such as that of the 1884 Chinese Exclusion Act). While the 1965 law did provide for the entry of Asian immigrants to the United States (though in very small numbers), a clause in the law allowed for only those of a certain educational level and professionals (2) 21

or for those who already had family living in the United States to enter. Needless to say, it is also doubtful that lower class Asian immigrants could afford the fare for the trip to America. Those who did bargain with smugglers (known colloquially as "snakeheads" in Chinese) likely ended up in America working at brothels, sweatshops or restaurants in Chinatown, and were unknown to the outside world. Even upon closer examination, however, the model minority myth simply does not hold water. First, as has been pointed out by a number of researchers, from Ronald Takaki to Sucheng Chan, that a considerable percentage of Asian Americans live in urban areas, where the cost of living is considerably higher. Sucheng Chan, in Asian Americans: An Interpretive History, writes that "more than half of the Asian/Pacific American population in the United States lives in only five metropolitan areas - Honolulu, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Chicago, and New Yorkâ&#x20AC;Śthus, while Asian Americans (and others) living there may earn more, they also have to spend more." Anyone who has ever lived or even spent time in such areas can attest to just how expensive a day can be. Further, Chan wrote in 1991: "Nowadays, with the growing (for lack of a better term) gentrification of Asian Americans, many are moving out into the suburbs, into places such as Monterey Park, California, or Long Island, New York." The cost of living in these places, then, is at least as high as that of major urban areas, if not higher; land taxes in the Great Neck South area, which has a substantial Asian American population, reached approximately $6,661 in 2000 (10). Yet the incongruence does not stop here; another major point of contention centers around the statistic that Asian families earn a higher income than white families. This ignores the fact that most Asian families have multiple workers, as well as the 22

possibility that Asian Americans also spend more time at work than non-Asians. For instance, in a study conducted by Won Moo Hurh and Kwang Chung Kim of West Illinois University, if one is to use a formula of achievement divided by cost, then it can be shown that in order for Asian Americans to achieve the same amount as whites, Asian Americans must work harder (1). One major determining factor of this was the ROI, or return on investment; given that Asian cultures invest so heavily in education, especially higher ed, then it would make sense to look at the return that Asians received for each year of schooling (in addition to their mean years of schooling). The results of this research were dismaying: for every extra year that Asian Americans (in this case, Chinese and Japanese Americans) went to school, they received less return on interest than whites. For instance, while whites received 717.16 dollars, Japanese received 577.87 dollars, whereas Chinese received 596.23 dollars (1). One should also keep in mind, however, that these figures are just for native (that is, US) born Japanese and Chinese; the ROI rates for foreign-born Chinese and Japanese, Filipinos, Koreans, Asian Indians, and Vietnamese are much lower. Granted, the tables are from a paper published in the late 1980s, but these charts also reveal another interesting fact that many may not have known - even amongst Asian Americans - that is, not all ethnicities are equal. For example, Southeast Asian refugees who flee from war and turmoil in their native countries often find themselves in America -without a job, without money, and below the poverty line. One study conducted by the Asian Outlook

Defense Department in 1993 found that nearly 67.2% of Laotians were below the poverty line, along with 65% Hmong (an ethnic group scattered across Southeast Asia), 46% Cambodians, and 33% Vietnamese (2). These figures clearly sink the assertion that any Asian immigrant can simply walk off a boat and make it in America, Horatio Alger-style. Lastly, there is also the problem of under-employment, as well as the lack of Asian Americans in upper-level managerial positions. Sucheng Chan notes that more Asian Americans than white Americans are employed in the service industry, such as farm workers, day laborers and the like (5). Also, with the influx of Asian immigrants following the 1965 legislation, a considerable number of Asians faced occupational downgrading, where a highly qualified worker is forced to take a lower-paying job after arriving in America because they are unfamiliar with the language (6, pg 479). This issue is especially problematic amongst two demographics; the first are Korean immigrants, who, as they do not understand English, are forced to open small businesses (most notably family-run grocery stores); the second demographic are Filipino immigrants, the vast majority of whom, despite being trained health-care professionals, must work in occupations that are lower than what they trained for as their grasp of English is insufficient (6).

Lastly, there is the problem of the lack of Asian Americans in high business and government positions. Researchers from Sucheng Chan to Ronald Takaki have also noted that Asian Americans who list themselves as "managers" often neglect to mention the fact that such "managers" are self-employed, and not workers at a large company (5). One horror story, related by Takaki, records the view of a Thomas Campbell, a general manager at the Westinghouse electricity corporation, in which he expressed his view that Asian Americans were happier staying in technical fields and out of managerial positions (477). In conclusion, the model minority myth is blatantly untrue, built on flawed statistics and personal prejudice. In part II of this article, the consequences of the model minority myth will be discussed. Sources: (1) Hurh, Won Moo, and Kwang Chung Kim. "The 'Success' Image of Asian Americans: Its Validity, Practical, and Theoretical Implications." Western Illinois University, 1987. (2) Myth Versus Facts: Asian American and Model Minorities. April 29, 2006. The University of Daytona School of Law. April 2, 2007. http://academic.udayton.edu/race/01race/model02.htm (3) Le, C.N. 2007. "The Model Minority Image" Asian-Nation: The Landscape of Asian America. <http://www.asiannation.org/model-minority.shtml> (April 2, 2007). (4) Chin, Andrew. "A Brief History of the Model Minority Stereotype." Model Minority: A Guide to Asian Empowerment. April 21, 2001. April 2, 2007. http://www.modelminority.com/article72.html (5) Chan, Sucheng. "A Critique of the Model Minority's Statistical Underpinnings." Asian Americans: An Interpretive History. New York: Gale Group, 1991. http://modelminority.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=279 (6) Takaki, Ronald. Strangers From a Distant Shore: A History of Asian Americans. New York: Back Bay Books, 1989. (7) Egan, Timothy. "Little Asia on the Hill." New York Times. 7 January 2007. (8) Liu, John. "The Model Minority Myth Must be Dispelled." Pipe Dream. 20 March 1987. (9 Chin, Frank. "Confessions of a Chinatown Cowboy." Bulletproof Buddhists and Other Essays. Honolulu: U of Hawaii Press, 1998. 63-109.

Asian Outlook

(10) Great Neck, New York. City-Data.com. April 15, 2007 <http://www.city-data.com/city/Great-Neck-New-York.html>

Notes From Reality... The Rat Race to Equality (or something) By Melissa Chan

After graduating in May of 2006, I did absolutely nothing. I was bored out of my mind. My summer was absolutely uneventful. When I started law school in mid-August, however, I was really glad I took the summer off. At orientation, the professors welcomed us by saying that law school would be the worst three years of our lives. They scared the crap out of us. Suddenly, I was the busiest I had ever been. You know how at Binghamton you might cram before a test or skim the novel you're reading for class? Well at law school, I had to learn to read and dissect every word of every assignment. I quickly learned the meaning of "study." The semester flew by. I looked forward to finally relaxing after finals. However, I spent winter break working on an application for the New York City Bar Association Minority Fellowship, which included writing a paper. When school resumed, I continued the application process by going to interviews. After the entire process was over, I was lucky enough to be selected as a fellow and I got a summer position at a large law firm in New York City. About the Fellowship The New York City Bar Minority Fellowship places first-year minority students from the city law schools in law firms and in-house counsel departments for corporations. Fellowship candidates have to go through a multi-step application process, which includes submitting transcripts, resumes, and writing samples and acquiring letters of recommendation. Candidates have to go before their law school's screening committee. Students chosen from that pool are then interviewed by the Bar's Committee on Retention and Recruitment of Lawyers. Those selected participate in firm or corporate department summer associate programs. The Great Divide I have never revealed my race or ethnicity on any application I've filled out. I was completely against being distinguished by what seemed like a superficial characteristic. I didn't believe my race was a relevant trait that could accurately describe who I am. That's not to say that I was at all embarrassed or ashamed by my race, but I never wanted to be chosen for anything based on it; I wanted to be recognized for my accomplishments. 24

Asian Outlook

Notes From Reality... As you can imagine, I was initially pretty reluctant to apply for the minority fellowship. I was conflicted; I wanted to be one of the lucky few first-year students to apply what they've learned in a corporate environment (an experience usually available only to upperclassmen at the top of their class), but I didn't think such a fellowship was necessary. I felt as though I would be given this rare opportunity based solely on race. I was completely wrong. Seeing the Light, or Selling Out? I internalized the idea of me being my race when I visited my career development advisor at my law school. She told me to remove from my resume anything that revealed my race, religion, and political affiliation. She warned that employers would discriminate against me based on those things. As she rambled on, I wondered if I should delete my last name, too, or if I should attend interviews with a paper bag over my face. Race is not something you can hide, nor is it something you should want to hide. If I had taken her advice, my resume would have been completely blank. I realized that my race isn't who I am because I look a certain way or because my parents are from a certain place. Race is part of who I am because it's where my interests lie (I was an Asian Studies major and a former editor of AO). After talking to my advisor I realized that race is not severable from identity. To separate myself from my race would be to completely erase who I am. Taking my ambivalence towards racial qualifiers into account, I had a tough time working through the application process. It took a good deal of effort, but as I plowed through it all, I began to think of the fellowship not as a hand out, but as a way to gradually change the demographics of the law profession. Instead of feeling like a charity case, I felt like I was bringing something different to the field. I stopped looking at my career path and my race as separate from my identity. Attending a Diversity Cocktail Reception hosted by a large law firm cemented my epiphany. The associates of color who received us were very approachable and were open to receive any questions about life as an associate, including questions regarding the issue of race in the workplace. I was particularly inspired by the Howard Law School professor who was invited to speak. The speaker suggested that being a minority lawyer in a large firm is analogous to being a superhero. Years ago, he recalled, minority lawyers would don the "'costume' of lawyer," masking their personal identity. While at work, a person was a superhero. On his own time, he's just plain old him. The speaker suggested that employers are becoming more liberal in their approaches to recruiting, that they now look for associates who are more like the X-Men. The X-Men's powers can't be attributed to fancy gadgets or a separate persona they allow to emerge only out of necessity. The X-Men are who they are because of their powers and regardless of their garb. Likewise, he recommended that we, as professionals of color, not take off our "professional" hat at 5:00 and then don our "individual" hat thereafter. Sorry to beat this dead horse of a metaphor, but we really should just wear one hat all day, everyday. Not differentiating between professionalism and individuality (which includes race) Asian Outlook

Notes From Reality... diversifies the workplace more naturally employers don't consciously look for good potential employees in addition to being of color. Thus we should internalize both race and occupation as part of identity. Sooner than Later In sum, if you have qualms about participating in programs instituted for minorities, don't. Take any and every opportunity available. Be grateful, but don't make excuses for your accomplishments. Be proud of them because they make you who you are. I'm glad I overcame my stubborn principles and pursued the minority fellowship. I'm excited to start working this summer because I know I am going to have an experience unlike that of the average first year student's summer. Applying for the fellowship also made me realize that while we have come a long way in terms of the way we view minorities, we cannot forget that this change took place only a short time ago. While I am very grateful, I still hope that minority professionals will soon gain enough respect that minority recruitment will no longer be necessary. I'm not looking for special treatment, but merely equality. Once enough minorities are successful in their respective fields, the programs' purpose will be fulfilled and, hopefully, their existences will no longer be necessary. That's not to say that current employers are necessarily racist, but I look forward to a time when employers will show enough volition to diversify their employment demographic without the help of the minority programs. http://www.abcny.org/Diversity/LawyersofColor .htm --Melissa was the Editor-in Chief of AO, 2005 - 2006

Words from the Wiser by Katherine K. Lam For those of you who aren't familiar, I was a former member of Asian Outlook. I am now graduated, and I have a full time job at Oxford University Press. (If you want a good job, feel free to contact me. That's what alumni are here for.) Working is great; living is wonderful. Your current editor-in-chief, Peter Lam, has been more than wonderful-spending his own money to send alumni issues of AO. You, my current AO-ers, have restored my faith in Binghamton. Keep working hard, it is worth every minute you spend on an article; every minute you spend on a layout; every minute you spend on a thought… AO has grown so much since I ran it, and it has flourished since I've left. Congratulations to you all, pat yourself on the back and keep moving. The Asian American movement has quite a huge agenda to complete. Your Lunar New Year resolution wasn't put on the SA ballot. So what? Deal with it, it's life. Be angry; be deceived, but do not be disappointed. If anything, learn from Naruto (just don't be stupid like him). Be hopeful, and work even harder to push the resolution. Do not quit. DO. NOT. QUIT. Model yourselves after Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson if you have to, just don't be as annoying as they are. We have a brief American legacy, and we need to extend it. If San Francisco can push such a legislation, so can the students at Binghamton University. It's not just a matter of being Asian anymore-it's a matter of establishing your rights as an American. As for life outside the Binghamton bubble, I'll tell you, it's hard. You'll never be shot harder than during the interim period where you have to reprove yourself to everyone. It hurts, but it'll teach you a good lesson on humility. I almost miss Binghamton…but then I remember it's Binghamton. Before I finish, I feel I should include some words on writing. I am an English major who believes that good writing can change everyone. On that note, fellow AO-ers and potential contributors… write. Write your hearts and minds out; don't worry about mistakes. Punctuation is a trivial matter that can be justified by creative forces. (Used correctly, the semicolon can be your best friend.) Grammar should never be an issue-James Joyce himself constructed Finnegan's Wake without making any sense of it. It is a considered a bestseller today. You have editors for a reason…talk to them, let them know what you want to convey… and the world will hear you. The world will hear you. --Katherine was the Editor-in-Chief of AO, 2004 - 2005

Asian Outlook

conscience

GROW

LETâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S

conscience

art by kris lau

First Love: A Madd Real Poem right before the quiz, the girl in front of me asked "Can I borrow a piece of a paper, I used up my last" I took a second to think and then I made up my mind "Only if you return it" was my clever reply she turned to the kid next to me and asked him for one he didn't have, so she took mine but she didn't thank me -rekstizzy tha meal plan peeimp

artwork by kris lau

? SIVE HUH S E R P IM YOU Y G. BUT IF !!! PRETT IN X H O T B E T M X OR SO HIS TE EEPER OOK AT T D OF SURFBOARD ETHING D . L M ! !! O H S A S O T W ESEN E KIN USE.. LIKE SOM LLY REPR US, BECA A L â&#x20AC;&#x2122;S U L IT T E C T T A S U AT FIR IT? YO OOK, IT WHAT IS OTHER L . N L A U F E K G A IN T E MEAN AND MOR SEN ONE O H C E H T YOU ARE Y TO OGRAPH T O H P D RT, AN ORIES, A T S T R O H OETRY, S OM SUBMIT P @GMAIL.C E C N IE C AOCONS Asian Outlook

Wednesday Sitting on this bench, it’s freezing, winds traveling by me, ignoring me, just touching me enough to let me know it’s with purpose; to go where I never know, but I’d like to find out. But there’s something about the cold that wakes me, gives me a rush, arrests me with solitude that I need, and now an old man walks by me, bald, hands in his pockets, his face nervous his head down, always down, down, down, he’s got no balls, and now an Indian girl walks past me with a face of attitude, she stares at me with this dirty look, she probably thinks I’m a loner, no friends. And this bird, this huge, black, beautiful thing with wings as strong as the wind that takes it, it just soars freely, gives me a "caw!" and this solitude is strong, it’s nice, it’s extraordinary, I’m alone, not lonely, it’s what I need; I need to sit here and expect things to fall apart, expect to not get that so-called internship, expect to hear bad news from home tonight at 7:00, expect to hear more debates about that person who killed 33; "If it was a black guy, they woulda said his name already," I hear. Funny. "If it was a Latino, or something, then that’s normal, but Asian?" I hear. Funny. "An Asian guy? Are you serious?" Asians don’t need to apologize for a damn thing, and now this wind just keeps pushing me off this bench, my eyes water, my brows start moving down, the black bird stares at me, it moves its head, just looks. No one’s around, no people nothing, I’m alone. This is for me. -hugo delgado

Asian Outlook

Ain’t it a shame

warmer months’ breeze

AINT IT A SHAME

you see in color, and

by devek singh

Howling dogs don’t know about your woes (or how a poem flows) they bark and beg like men strewn across seas with dreams unearthed by the

black and white, and grey, and you see me with the tip of my tongue cut off saying nothing caught between midnight and day you’d say it was a damn shame the stakes higher than stars or maybe just airplanes, or maybe not, maybe just dirt, just earth. either way, I’ll see you in the ground below underneath words and what they were worth, which verse was worst, and which word came first never mattered at all and you’ll finally see why I can’t speak for you, and what as true, but mostly that you should’ve just

done what you had to do

photography by Tudor Hulubei photograph edited by Irwin Leong

Asian Outlook

i tried but now i am died pt 2 so i couldnt give two fucks for lady luck even if i had four dicks and 8 balls tah lick i aint got one penny to toss in that fountain but i heard an accountant got lost in a wishing well and although i wish him well, i bet he got greedy but whose to blame him even mah pockets is needy so im stayin up late at night in my room and reflect like light from the moon by hte light from tha moon hopin it just might lighten my mood lighten up my atmosphere and attitude i've had it up to tha attic thas like up to here and im fearin im doomed to bein a mufuken pattern or mirror so whats happenin aint nothin captain you could steer this ship to the cliff of this bitch till we dip to tha bottomless pit and we sit in a big ball of shit -rekstizzy tha meal plan peeimp Asian Outlook

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;VE

SEEN THESE

BEFORE

I've memorized a small, white, narrow path to the entrance of the building where I lived at six years old. I've memorized the scatter of the roaches on this yellow kitchen counter as soon as I turned the light on, like tiny little black greasy dots going up, down, left and right in black crevices. I've memorized the kitchen floor where I wrapped my arms around my grandmother's legs and she'd drag me across it, it had these light square tiles, and smooth. I've memorized hopping, climbing, and running with my arms in the air through the trees in Kissena Park in Queens years ago when I was five. I've memorized the space between this patch of green grass and a black metal fence where I saw a white cat stop and stare at me, it had blue eyes, and then it turned and ran away. I've memorized this wooden dock by Shea Stadium in September, and it had white boats all around it with the waves from the water moving, and moving, and I sat on the wood and I saw this blazing red sun. I've memorized the crowds of people I didn't know when I was lost on an animal farm, a field trip when I was in the first grade sometime in March. I've memorized walking to a field of snow, standing in the middle, looking up, letting myself fall with arms out, and lay there staring at the sky. I've memorized the black eyelashes over the eyes that I stare into when I'm in front of the mirror, they're delicate strands of aligned tiny hairs curving upwards. I've memorized all the aisles of books, the brown, wooden shelves, the brown hardwood floor, the stacks of books to read, the way I sit cross-legged on the floor reading. I've memorized the passing buildings, one by one when the train is moving; they're old, worn-down, and empty from outside built from grey cement. I've memorized these Chinese women in wooden cages, with white cloth wrapped around their bodies and a sign next to the cage that says "This is what's going on in China RIGHT NOW" and I remember their faces that had torture and a tiredness to them. I've memorized the front building step that I sat on, in front of that building I lived in when I was six; it had this grey surface mixed with black stains and then a shooting star came and went in a second when I turned my head up. I've memorized the long sigh that I gave looking at my grandmother's plastic mask when she lay on the hospital bed with her eyes closed and that beep...beep...beep sound. I was six. I've memorized the crowded people on the line, at the tables, eating, talking in a small greasy diner late in '05, somewhere in Manhattan. I've memorized my small bedroom, and these two brown finches I had that flew hysterically in all directions in their gold, shiny cage. I've memorized the smooth white- cement balcony where I stood next to my cousin on a red rug and stars ran across the sky. I was eleven then, in 1996. I've memorized the way my mouth's closed lips feel when they move a little, thinking of small pictures, all these little things I remember. -hugo delgado

photo courtesy of Atchou

Asian Outlook

Peter Lam

Home Asian Outlook

C H

undergarments drying in streets of Shanghai

I N

Beautiful Uighur girls in Xinjiang, China

p h o t o g r a p h y

A Chillinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; in Shanghai 34

Asian Outlook

b y

Men lounging outside town center in Taishan, Guangdong

d a n

I Granny!

l i u

Trudging through a section of the Great Wall of China, outside of Beijing Asian Outlook

Why I Am A Chinese Nationalist? by Will To The other night, I asked myself “Why?” Why am I so bitter? Why am I devoted to something that no one else seems to care about? Why do I seek out a major that has no perceivable value in this world of fast money and big business? Why am I an Asian Studies major when it seems that all the other Asians are Science and Business and Engineering majors? Why am I writing for Asian Outlook, an underdog magazine, when I should be doing my schoolwork? But most of all, I asked myself why I was a Chinese nationalist, the kind with a lowercase “n”, the kind that is less common than a warm Binghamton day in February. When I was in middle school, my mother gave me a thick, leather bound book full of black-andwhite pictures and Chinese words to read, or at least skim through, since I knew as much about Chinese history as an average, non-Asian (or even an average Asian person) did. It weighed as much as I did at the time, but neither that nor my ignorance put me off. The only words I could read were actually two numbers; one that said 1840, and the other that said 1975. It was an illustrated history of China from 1840-1975, an era which was some of the worst years in Chinese, and indeed, Asian history, dominated as they were by imperialism and war, as well as all the ugly, nasty consequences that are the by-products of such occurrences. Undeterred (and uninformed about such facts), I opened the book, and perhaps a new chapter of my life, as nothing was the same afterwards. My mind was shattered by the grainy, tattered pictures, which, despite their low quality and age, conveyed suffering and human emotion as only images could. In it, I saw pictures of Chinese killed during both Sino-Japanese wars, of pregnant women with their bellies gutted open by Japanese bayonets, their bodies bleeding and their guts trailing. I saw pictures of the dead and dying, of Taiping rebels and renegade Boxers, of foreign soldiers and Chinese prisoners. I saw pictures of weak, withered opium addicts clutching at their long, thin pipes the way drowning men hold on to lifesavers, their eyes hollow, devoid, and empty, counting the time from one high to the next. I saw pictures of proud, inflexible Confucian scholars, slaves to dogma and strangers to pragmatism, handicapped by their rigid beliefs and unable to keep pace with the times. I saw foreign might, channeled into a bullying, angry behavior, and I saw Chinese weakness and ineptitude, which translated into untold difficulty for the common people. Most of all, however, I saw frustration, pain, and disbelief--as well as apathy--in the pictures, tattooed onto the faces of the hopeless, more vivid than if they had a line-and-ink drawing scrawled on their body. I saw poverty and hunger, the gnawing, unrelenting kind that transformed humans into beasts, the type that I was fortunate enough never to have experienced. I saw history, and I saw my own ignorance, silhouetted against the depth and the raw emotion of the people in the pictures. For the first time, though sadly not the last, I felt shame, acidic and unrelenting, the kind that you only feel at yourself for letting someone down. In my case, it was for my lack of knowledge on this subject; while I learned about “world” (American and European) history, my grasp of the events and happenings of my own people, my ancestral country, were as drops in the ocean.

For almost an hour after I turned the last page, I sat there in silence, greatly disheartened by all that I had seen. Until now, Chinese history had been an abstraction--a concept, a collection of fuzzy images and unrelated ideas narrated by my mother’’s clear, unyielding voice--but the book had brought it to life vividly--so vividly, in fact, that I was afraid to touch the photographs for fear that I too would lose my head, like the photo of the Chinese man about to be beheaded by the Japanese officer. Asian Outlook

When I finally absorbed all that I had seen, I took a walk around the block, breathing in the quiet afternoon air and contrasting the quiet peace of my suburban home to the turmoil and chaos of that book. It was then, standing on that pockmarked sidewalk and worlds away from the events in the album, that I decided to never forget what I saw; I also decided that I would do my best to make sure that the world would never forget. It did not occur then, to my thirteen-year-old mind, how little one person could do, but even if it had, I wondered if I would have listened to my doubts. So I sprinted back towards my house, and opened the book again, looking through it once more so that my sense of purpose would not leave me. Now, six years later, I am not sure of my progress; true, I am not the oblivious, foolish middle-schooler of yesteryear whose historical knowledge of China came from TVB dramas and soap operas, but neither am I very far along in my goal of infecting others with the disgust and unease that I felt. Maybe it is selfish of me to want others to feel as badly as I did after witnessing some of the darker moments in human history, but then, nothing is as effective a remedy against apathy as disgust. But why is it that I told this story? What reason did I have to commit this anecdote to print, to smear it across the precious pages of this magazine (paper incidentally, was a Chinese invention) and shout it out for the readers of Asian Outlook to read? Certainly a tale alone does not spur others on to action, however moving (if at all) it might have been to readers, nor does it justify my anger very well; if images like this could make my blood boil, then wouldn’t I get angry every day, every time there is an injustice committed? And besides, isn’t it selfish to simply care about Asians, when in fact, everyone suffered, and suffered greatly at that, during World War II? Indeed, such pictures are not prime justification for my anger, as those of you who know me would probably know. I am not trying to make excuses either, at least not with this poorly-written reflection that I pulled from the drab tale that is the story of my life; nonetheless, it is, as far as I know, the pivotal experience, the driving force behind my Chinese nationalism. And notice that it is nationalism with a lower case “n”, not a capital “N” as is associated with the Chinese Nationalist Party, which ruled China from 19111949 and continues to hold considerable power in Taiwan. Nor am I trying to shunt aside other catastrophes and disasters that may have befell other races at this same period in history, whether it be the brutal invasion of Ethiopia by Italy in the 1930s, or the Holocaust. Instead, I feel that unlike the aforementioned events, which are undeniably well-known by a large portion of America, the Asian experience is cast in shadows and doubts, surrounded by half-truths and shrouded in mystery even to Asian and Asian-Americans, who, arguably, have an obligation to at least know the basics of Asian history. After all, is it not crucial to know your heritage and your history? Does that not form an important part of who you are? It seems to me that a great part of Asians are not very knowledgeable about their history and culture, and as such, are also very apathetic; a deeper understanding of the events and forces responsible for shaping contemporary Asia could certainly help counter this and instill pride in those who have long thought of their culture as feudalistic, chauvinist, and obsolescent, as a dead, unmoving thing. And so here I am, swimming against the current where I can and floating with the tide where I cannot, looking ahead to the bright lights that F. Scott Fitzgerald wrote about in Gatsby. The future is uncertain, alternatively depressing, exciting, and hopeful, but of course that is nothing new. At least I know what I want, and where I’m coming from; in today’s world of drifters and existentialists, that is a blessing.

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A Month Away From Home by Yi Cheung I took out my keys to open the door. It had been awhile since I’d been home, but everything still seemed the same. The air was filled with nostalgia as I breathed in and sighed. The landlord still hadn’t gotten around to painting our brown front door to its once vibrant red color. The keys jingled like a broken bell as I used an old trick to jiggle the lock open. As soon as I got in, I was immediately met with complete darkness in the hallway – no one was home. “Hello?” I called out. The sound of my own voice and the drone of my rolling suitcase echoed in response to my call. I set down my baggage, immediately went for the phone, and instinctively dialed my mom’s number. “Hey mom,” I said, greeting her in Chinese. “Oh, you’re home early, it’s only 6,” she responded as her voice rang sharply into my ears. The high pitch of her voice brought back a nostalgic pain to my ears. “Yea mom, there was no traffic, it only took 3.5 hours,” I said as my mind trailed off.

“Oh! Make sure you drink the soup,” she said as her voice screeched against my ears, “I’ll be home soon but you’ll have to eat before-” she continued as I moved the phone a good three inches away from my ear to avoid the piercing pain. “Um, hum mom, yea…” I said, responding loudly into the phone receiver. “Ok mom, bye – yea, I got it, umm hmm – ok bye,” I said and quickly tried to hang up the phone before she could interject anymore. I plopped onto the bed in the living room and sat across from the heater that was next to my father’s chair. Nearby, I could see that my father’s shoes were laid out. “Mom would yell at dad for that,” I thought as I remembered my mom once stating the heater brought out the worst smell from his shoes. I shook my head at the thought of the arguments my parents would get into, and sighed again as I got up to move the shoes elsewhere. I looked around the living room to try and find something to do, anything that would make up for the time that I spent away from this house – my house. I was immediately fixated on a small red light blinking from the other corner of the room. I walked towards it and realized that there were several messages from the answering machine. I had forgotten that our family owned an answering machine as we hardly made use of it – I was never home and English was a language my parents never mastered. 38

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I began to go through them one by one. “Hey you could win a trip to – message deleted.” “You can consolidate your loans now – message deleted.” “This was starting to get tedious,” I thought as I continued to skim through the messages. “I should’ve signed up for the national do not call list,” I thought, until I was interrupted by a male voice. “Hey, I’m going to be home late,” I listened intently to the voice on the machine – it was my dad, “There’s been a delay. Bye. Beep. Message received 03/15 8:30 pm.” I deleted the message and thought to myself that the message was recorded nearly a month ago on the machine.

photograph courtesy of imogen cunningham “What else should I do,” I contemplated to myself as I began to lie down on the bed. Almost as soon as my head touched the pillow, I could feel an air of nostalgia wash over me again as I closed my eyes and allowed sleep to pass over me. The next thing I knew, I saw my mom’s head hovering over me. She looked older than the last time I remembered her. It had only been a month, but I became more aware that her jet black hair was now streaked with white hair, and her eyes were surrounded by wrinkled that plagued the old. “You’ve been asleep for over 2 hours, get up and eat dinner.” I rolled over and pushed my head under the pillow. Asian Outlook

“Get up – now.” “All right, all right,” I said, whining back in Chinese. I immediately pulled myself up and looked at my mom as she glanced at me with a stern gaze. I looked away and gazed at the clock, it was barely 9 pm. “Make sure to check on the fish in 5 minutes, I made that for your father,” my mom casually responded as she walked off to the bathroom to change and wash up. “Ok-“ “Ringgg.” “Hold on mom,” I said as I reached over to the bed stand for the phone. “Is this the Wong residence?” “Yes.” “May I speak with a relative of Mr. Key Wong.” “You mean Mr. Chi Wong, and yes I’m his daughter.” “I’ve been trying to get in contact with one of Mr. Wong’s relative for a week now, but I’ve only been able to speak with a woman who doesn’t speak English. I’m a coworker of your father’s and I’m afraid, I have some bad news for you,” he continued as I felt my stomach take a deep plunge. As he continued to speak, I felt my hands become increasingly limper with each second that passed, until finally, my hands became too weak and I lost my grip on the phone. In that split second, as the phone fell, everything became quiet. It was almost as though an invisible force had covered my ears, futilely protecting me from what I had just heard. I could feel the invisible force swallowing me and pushing me into a surreal dream that had now become my life. And then, just as immediately as it started, that split second was ended by a loud and hollow sound that echoed throughout the apartment as the phone finally reached the floor. The phone dispelled the silence, and every sound that followed that second became severely vivid, almost as though I was a deaf person who had finally regained her hearing. The sound of the water running in the bathroom seized my attention and relentlessly abused my ears. I slowly turned and looked at the bathroom and realized what I was going to do – what I had to do. “Mom?” I called out as I snapped out of it, and began to walk towards the bathroom, “When’s dad coming home?” I asked, while cautiously approaching the bathroom entrance like a moth to a fire.

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The walk seemed like an eternity, until finally the entrance was mere inches from where I was standing. When I turned in through the entrance, I suddenly found myself face to face with a woman who seemed older beyond her years. The face of the woman who had raised me since birth suddenly seemed like a complete stranger, almost as though I had never met her before today. Time had done its damage, and her face reflected it – the deep lines etched in her face added a frailty to her appearance, and made her look as though she was close to being broken like a crumbling wall. I unwillingly met her unfaltering gaze and saw the tears well up in her eyes. At that moment, she truly looked like someone I didn’t recognize. The woman who raised me with a stern hand and harsh voice would never have showed an ounce of weakness – least of all to her daughter. As we exchanged stare, I felt time passing by us, beating us to the finish line, and smirking as we remained frozen in time. Both of us were somewhat unwilling to speak – the silence only grew with each passing second. “We need to talk about dad,” I finally uttered.

photograph courtesy of Gordon L Wolford

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Senioritis: A Photo Journey to Nowhere by Peter Lam

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artwork by fan chen Asian Outlook

by Kaming Cheung

i pass on this world with this(i will always have this with me) and i will have lived with little left to give; nothing shall be all i have owned but there is one thing that shall remain with me always it is what i have already lost and what i may never regain but still i will be able to hold on when all i can hold onto has let go of me if you could remember that once you loved me(and i always have) and if you could remember how it all mattered(more than all that i ever had and more than all that the world has seen and more than all that is and ever was) then you will know what i will always hold i pass on this world knowing you once loved me(and i always will) --pcl 46

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artwork by ronald kim

ENJOY YOUR SUMMER FROM ALL OF US AT ASIAN OUTLOOK

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Asian Outlook Editorial Staff & Company Spring 2007, for the most part.

Sorry about your leg there, Elliot, and most of your face, Devek!