TO MAKE THINGS HAPPEN.
THIS ZINE IS ABOUT TRAVELING WITH YOUR BEST FRIENDS OR ALONE. MOST IMPORTANTLY IT IS ABOUT STORYTELLING AND THE HUMAN CONNECTION. SADLY THESE ARE TWO THINGS WE OFTEN SEE GO MISSING THESE DAYS FOR ONE REASON OR ANOTHER. WE FEEL THAT TOO MANY PEOPLE ARE LONELY TOO OFTEN. WE HOPE THIS ZINE, A SIMPLE PHYSICAL GESTURE CAN BE READ, VIEWED, SHARED OR COLLECTED IN REAL LIFE AND WE HOPE IT WILL HELP FOSTER A COMMUNITY. WE HOPE THIS ZINE INSPIRES YOU TO TRAVEL, GIVE BACK, GET UNCOMFORTABLE, ASK THAT GIRL OR GUY FOR THEIR NUMBER, SING KARAOKE SOBER, SING KARAOKE DRUNK, SKY DIVE, FART ON YOUR BEST FRIENDS CHIN, WHATEVER YOUR BEST SELF IS IN THIS CURRENT MOMENT WE HOPE THIS ZINE HELPS YOU GET THERE.
THIS TRIP CAME ABOUT WHEN PF FLYERS REACHED OUT TO ME TO SHOOT THEIR SUMMER CATALOG. IT NEEDED TO BE WARM WHEREVER WE SHOT IT. I CHOSE BELIEZE THEY LIKED THAT IDEA. WE NEEDED MALE AND FEMALE LIFESTYLE MODELS. I ASKED MY FRIEND DYLAN AND JULIE (PRONOUNCED YULIE) SHE IS FROM THE UKRAINE. FAST FORWARD TO THE DAY OF THE TRIP JULIE SEES OUR UGLY MUGS AT THE AIRPORT AND DECIDES TO BAIL ON THE TRIP LAST MINUTE. I LOST $687 ON HER FLIGHT. WE STILL NEEDED A FEMALE MODEL. SO WE INVITED KEVIN...NOT AS PRETTY BUT HE FITS INTO WOMENS CLOTHES. WORKED OUT PERFECTLY. DYLAN, KEVIN, AND I TOOK OFF THAT NIGHT.
THE FIRST NIGHT KEVIN AND DYLAN WRESTLED. KEVIN GOT HIS EAR AND TOE CUT OPEN IN THE SCUFFLE. THERE WAS A LOT OF BLOOD. HE DEFINITELY NEEDED STITCHES BUT KEVIN DOESN’T BITCH, I DO. WE TOOK PHOTOS. DRANK EXPENSIVE BEERS AND CHEAP RUM. PICKED THE WORLDS SWEETEST ORANGES FROM AN ORCHARD AND MADE SOME PRETTY AMAZING RUM SCREWDRIVERS. DYLAN SKATED ON DIRT AND JAGGED ASS CONCRETE. WE SHOT IN THE JUNGLE BY A WATERFALL. GOT EATEN BY MOSQUITOS. MET A WORKER AT OUR RESORT NAMED GAIRO. 22 EXPECTING A KID SOON. HE WAS A VERY SELFLESS PERSON. WE VISITED MAYAN TEMPLES. SAW PUPPIES. SAW A DEAD DOG. GOT PULLED OVER BY MEN WITH MACHINE GUNS. ASKED US IF WE WERE DRINKING. (WE WERE.) DYLAN SAID NO. (THE DUDE DOESN’T CRACK UNDER PRESSURE.) THEY LET US GO.
A FEW DAYS LATER WE TOOK GYRO BACK TO THE JUNGLE. GOT EATEN BY MOSQUITOS AGAIN. MADE MORE ORANGE RUM DRINKS. WENT SWIMMING. WENT TO PLACENCIA VILLAGE. (AN OFF THE RESORT DOWN TOWN AREA) HAD DINNER THERE. MET A BARBER WITH A CRAZY EYE AND 3 NIPPLES. HE WAS VERY MUSCULAR AND FRIENDLY.
THE BARBER OVER HEARD US TALK ABOUT FISHING. WE FOLLOWED HIM TO A HOUSE TO TALK ABOUT A CHARTERING A BOAT AND TO MEET AN ARTIST. HE DIDNT TAKE OUR KIDNEYS. HE TOLD US WE NEEDED TO FIND CHINO BEHIND RICO’S CAFE. CHINO WAS ACTUALLY BEHIND RICO’S CAFE. HE DIDN’T TAKE OUR KIDNEYS EITHER. CHINO ENDED UP BEING A POET....AND A DAMN GOOD ONE. ASKED CHINO IF HE COULD TAKE US FISHING. HE SAID $150 USD EACH. I SAID $80. HE SAID YES. WE MET WITH CHINO THE NEXT MORNING. WE WERE LATE. HAD TO GO WITH MIDDLE AGED AMERICANS TO THE JUNGLE BEFORE WE COULD GO FISHING. WE WENT SPEAR FISHING. LISTENED TO MORE OF CHINOS POETRY . WATCHED HIM DRIVE A BOAT WITH ONE HAND AND ROLL A BLUNT WIT THE OTHER.
THE GUY MUST HAVE SMOKED 8 BLUNTS IN 5 HOURS. COULD STILL DRIVE A BOAT THROUGH MANGROVES AND THEN DIVE 80 FEET BELOW THE OCEAN WHILE SPEAR FISHING. (ALL ON ONE BREATH) CHINO DOESNT DRINK. I ASKED HIM HOW HE GOT SO GOOD AT POETRY. HE SAID HE DID 7 YEARS ON A MURDER CHARGE. A PEN WAS HIS ONLY ESCAPE FROM 4 WALLS. HE WAS ACQUITTED WHEN THEY FOUND THE ACTUAL MURDERER.....7 YEARS LATER. STILL HE SAID HE HELD NO RESENTMENT. HE WOULDN’T HAVE FOUND WRITING WITHOUT PRISON. I THINK HE JUST UNDERSTANDS HOW TO MAKE THE BEST OUT OF EVERYTHING. HE LOVES HIS KIDS. LOVES HIS WIFE. WOULD LIKE TO WRITE AND LIVE OFF THE OCEAN TILL THE DAY HE DIES. I ALWAYS MEET PEOPLE WHEN I TRAVEL. MAKE MORE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE IN NY. I NEVER MET A PERSON LIKE CHINO THOUGH.