70 THE NEXT WIVES’ CLUB CLUB

The Next

Club Club

Wives’

THAT RING ON YOUR FINGER DOESN’T MEAN YOU CAN RELAX. DOESN’T MEAN YOU CAN RELAX.

LISA MARSH LISA MARSH ON HOW TO SPOT—AND THWART— ON HOW TO SPOT—AND THWART— THE WOMEN COMING FOR YOUR HUSBAND THE WOMEN COMING FOR YOUR HUSBAND

It was a thoroughly modern fairy tale—the brainy blonde marrying the billionaire, becoming wife number four. With two young boys and the billionaire, becoming wife number four. With two young boys and homes at 740 Park Avenue, in Southampton, and in Sun Valley, they homes at 740 Park Avenue, in Southampton, and in Sun Valley, they seemed to be living happily ever. seemed to be living happily ever. Until the next partner showed up. Until the next partner showed up. Even at a social distance, the pending divorce between Charles P. Even at a social distance, the pending divorce between Charles P. Stevenson Jr. and Alex Kuczynski has been the talk of the town. The Stevenson Jr. and Alex Kuczynski has been the talk of the town. The New York Post reported he “blindsided” her with papers six days before New York Post reported he “blindsided” her with papers six days before Christmas. Kuczynski herself had disclosed the couple were in marriage Christmas. Kuczynski herself had disclosed the couple were in marriage counseling (in a 2019 book review she wrote for the counseling (in a 2019 book review she wrote for the New York Times), suggesting hopes for reconciliation. suggesting hopes for reconciliation.

But when a third party entered the picture, divorce papers followed. A source told the divorce papers followed. A source told the Post that Stevenson is now keeping company with his that Stevenson is now keeping company with his new fl ame, a “family friend,” at the isolated (and new fl ame, a “family friend,” at the isolated (and luxurious) Middle Fork Lodge in the wilderness luxurious) Middle Fork Lodge in the wilderness of Idaho. But while this story is still unfolding, it’s of Idaho. But while this story is still unfolding, it’s far from new. (Attorneys for neither Stevenson far from new. (Attorneys for neither Stevenson nor Kuczynski answered requests for comment.) nor Kuczynski answered requests for comment.) The Next Wife is a well-known character The Next Wife is a well-known character around Palm Beach, the Hamptons, and the Uparound Palm Beach, the Hamptons, and the Upper East Side. She (or he) is an attractive free per East Side. She (or he) is an attractive free agent looking for what you’ve got: specifically, agent looking for what you’ve got: specifically, your partner. your partner. “Here’s the golden rule of relationships ev“Here’s the golden rule of relationships everywhere: he who has the gold rules,” explains erywhere: he who has the gold rules,” explains Wednesday Martin, PhD, who has observed Wednesday Martin, PhD, who has observed the populace of Manhattan’s Upper East Side the populace of Manhattan’s Upper East Side from an anthropological perspective for her from an anthropological perspective for her book, book, Primates of Park Avenue: A Memoir. Primates of Park Avenue: A Memoir. That environment, she says, is ideal for a Next Wife on environment, she says, is ideal for a Next Wife on the prowl. the prowl. “On the Upper East Side, there are two women “On the Upper East Side, there are two women of reproductive age for every one man. This makes of reproductive age for every one man. This makes men on the UES what fi eld biologists called ‘the men on the UES what fi eld biologists called ‘the limiting sex’ and gives them a lot of power. They limiting sex’ and gives them a lot of power. They get to be choosy. They are the prize,” she says. get to be choosy. They are the prize,” she says. Such a dynamic brings gender inequality into Such a dynamic brings gender inequality into stark relief. And the privileged lifestyle makes it stark relief. And the privileged lifestyle makes it easy for a Next Wife to move in on men of means, easy for a Next Wife to move in on men of means, says Paul Wilmot, a retired publicist and mansays Paul Wilmot, a retired publicist and manabout-town who was himself a third husband to about-town who was himself a third husband to the late heiress Mollie Wilmot. the late heiress Mollie Wilmot. “This type of guy is on his own a lot of the “This type of guy is on his own a lot of the time,” he says—whether in the city during the time,” he says—whether in the city during the summer while the family is in the country, or out summer while the family is in the country, or out “WOMEN HAVE EVOLVED at business dinners that the wife, busy with kids, AS EXTREMELY CANNY SEXUAL AS EXTREMELY CANNY SEXUAL schools, and her life, can’t be bothered to attend. AND SOCIAL STRATEGISTS. AND SOCIAL STRATEGISTS. “Once he’s been married a long time, he’s not IT’S ONE OF THE REASONS the same guy as he was WE’RE HERE AS A SPECIES.” before,” Wilmot adds, and neither is his wife the DR. WEDNESDAY MARTIN same woman. Look at the relationship that rocked the real estate and art worlds. Out of nowhere, Harry Macklowe, 83, took up with Next Wife Patricia Landeau, 66, after being married to wife Linda Macklowe, 82, for more than 50 years. If he were younger, conventional wisdom would scream “midlife crisis,” Wilmot says, “but what is this?”

“ON THE UPPER EAST SIDE, THERE ARE TWO WOMEN OF REPRODUCTIVE AGE FOR EVERY ONE MAN…[SO] THEY GET TO BE CHOOSY. THEY ARE THE PRIZE.”

DR. WEDNESDAY MARTIN

Macklowe, whom the Post says fell asleep on one of his fi rst dates with Landeau, handed over a portion of his reported $2 billion fortune (which included a $700 million art collection) with Linda to be with the French businesswoman. To celebrate his new boo, he had a 42-foot banner photo of them both hung on 432 Park Avenue, the tallest residential building in New York, which he built. The New York Times called the move a “taunt.”

Landeau, president of the French Friends of the Israel Museum and a former fashion executive, is among the new breed of Next Wife who is far more than just a pretty face. She’s often someone who comes to the relationship with something different than the incumbent she unseats—a career, a business, or simply the idea for a business that needs to be funded.

Not all unions, however, take place between equals. And when social climbing is part of the equation, some Next Wives have to get creative with their tactics—like playing to the ego of their target.

One uptown woman who has brought about two divorces explains how she snagged her fi rst husband, an entertainment executive. “I made him feel like he was the center of my world and I became indispensable,” she says. “I introduced him to my crowd—people who could help him or were interesting.”

She adds, “I don’t think his (now ex-) wife ever did anything to help him professionally but add her family members to the payroll. I actually made an introduction that resulted in a big deal for him.”

“And I expected things in return—especially invitations to prominent events as his date, letting everyone know I was the important one, not his wife. And, you know, jewelry, fi rst-class or private travel, clothes, trinkets to accumulate. That sent the message that I was serious.”

As Jennifer Aniston may have thought when she fi rst saw Angelina Jolie: “Yikes.”

So, if a Next Wife is coming for your husband, what can you do to fend her o ? The answer: take control of the situation.

“There’s an old saying—nobody ever left anybody out of a warm bed,” Wilmot says, urging vulnerable spouses to step up their vigilance. “When you stop communicating and stop appreciating each other, of course someone can come in.”

Short of hiring a private detective to tail your husband’s every move, there are a few signs to be on the lookout for. These may include new hobbies or workout regimes he suddenly becomes devoted to (a SoulCycle or barre instructor is quite a catch), new friends you don’t know (and he doesn’t introduce you to), or simply a lack of interest in physical intimacy.

Martin, whose current book is Untrue: Why Nearly Everything We Believe About Women, Lust, and Infi delity Is Wrong and How the New Science Can Set Us Free, says more drastic measures are called for: ask for an open marriage.

She argues: “We know that other mateguarding strategies commonly used by women on the Upper East Side tend not to work. If your husband is having sex with someone new, why shouldn’t you be able to as well?

“For some husbands, being with a woman on the DL might be a lot less erotic and interesting if it were permitted. They might also fi nd their wife a lot more interesting if she too was having sex with a new partner.”

Martin adds: “Women have evolved as extremely canny sexual and social strategists. It’s one of the reasons we’re here as a species.”

Who to Watch Out For

The Friend

The fl irtation started in 1986, when Mercedes Kellogg lobbed a dinner roll across a ballroom at oil heir Sid Bass. It didn’t seem to matter that at the time, he was married to her friend Anne Bass, and she to Ambassador Francis Kellogg. The couple ran o to Paris, returning to divorce their respective spouses and marry in 1988.

The Assistant

In retrospect, Bass should have seen her replacement coming, since Kellogg had worked the same modus operandi before. She met her fi rst husband while working as an assistant at the UN in Switzerland, when Ambassador Kellogg was married to heiress Fernanda Munn. Mercedes followed him from Lausanne to New York, and they married soon after his divorce.

The Ingenue

Mia Farrow’s fi rst husband, Frank Sinatra, was 50 to her 21. After their divorce, she took up with the married composer André Previn, who, at 41 to her 25, was much closer in age. Still, it was messy—she gave birth to their twins in February 1970, before his divorce was fi nalized. His jilted exwife, songwriter Dory Previn, commemorated the betrayal in her song “Beware of Young Girls.”

The Daughter

Mia Farrow should have listened to Dory Previn. While comfortable in her decade-long relationship with fi lmmaker Woody Allen, Farrow discovered that her daughter Soon-Yi Previn, 21, was having an a air with him, age 56. Farrow broke o with Allen, who married Previn fi ve years later in 1997.

The Model

They met, improbably, at Marble Collegiate Church. She called out his wife publicly on the ski slopes of Aspen and (again improbably) proclaimed their relationship included “the best sex I’ve ever had.” Marla Maples’s break-up of the marriage of Ivana and Donald Trump was made for the tabloids— and fed them for months.

The Journalist

It can behoove a journalist and subject to charm each other. But after the Harvard Business Review’s Suzy Wetlaufer interviewed retired GE CEO Jack Welch in 2001, they charmed each other right into bed. It cost him a hefty divorce settlement (with then wife Jane Beasley, who was herself trysting with a friend’s chau eur) and Wetlaufer her job. Still, they married happily in 2004 and remained so until his death in March.