MOM FLUENCE Cover

Long-time blogger, model, and entrepreneur Rocky Barnes had a history of influencing in media long before her children were born. Now with the addition of sons Jones and Charlie, the new mom of two brings her social prowess to a whole new market.

MOM

photography by MATTHEW COOPER FLUENCE

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ROCKY BARNES is by no means new to the social media world, in fact the jet-setting mom of two is often considered one of the original influencers. “It’s crazy to think I have been doing social for over 12 years,” the The Bright Side founder tells Mini. “It’s been a wild ride and so much has changed.” Barnes has been in the industry long enough to watch Instagram trends come and go, amassing a whopping 3 million followers on the platform, and experienced the emergence of viral video phenomenon TikTok, on which the entrepreneur has nearly 4 million likes. “The change I have loved seeing the most over the past few years [on social media] is going from perfectly edited [photos] to more real and raw. I hope this trend continues!” she tells Mini. But that’s not the only Charlie is usually up first; he is still in our room until he is sleeping through the night. I try and give him his bottle right away because he’s at that age where as soon as Jones is up, he is way too distracted to eat. Once Jones is up, we get started on breakfast and getting ready for preschool. Charlie is also very into eating as well so breakfast is our big family meal all together. Matt and I switch off who takes Jones to school and who stays back with Charlie. Our nanny comes at 9 and then Matt and I can start our work day.”

transformation Barnes has been a part of recently— she has also welcomed two sons, Jones and Charlie, into the mix, expanding her social media presence to include elements of family life, and felt a big boost in body confidence. We sat down with the new mom of two to talk about the shift in her personal style, the surprises of motherhood, and her love/

hate relationship with the now nearly cliche term, “influencer.”

MORNING ROUTINE

“Before we had Charlie, Matt and I would switch off who had the morning shift each day, and give the other a chance to sleep in a bit. But now with two kids, it’s all hands on deck!

TRANSITION TO TWO

“I never thought anything could be harder than the transition from zero to one. Matt and I traveled all the time for work so it was already a big adjustment for us having our first. After having Charlie, I realized I was very wrong. With two, there is never a chance for one parent to

get a break. You are always on. I would say the second child is easier in the sense that you are more confident and know what you are doing, and not second guessing everything like the first. But the time managment and scheduling is way harder. I think it will be a bit easier when both boys are on the same schedule with naps, but at the moment, it’s hectic.

THE GREATEST CHALLENGE

THE MOST SURPRISING

“I think what surprised me most about motherhood was how much my perspective on mothers changed. After becoming a mom, you realize just how much a mom does and how much is sacrificed. It’s the hardest and most rewarding job at the same time. I have so much more respect for all the moms out there!”

PREPARING FOR A SIBLING

“One of my best girlfriends has two boys just a few months older than Jones and Charlie. She gave me some great advice for dealing with a new baby. When we came home from the hospital, we brought back a couple of presents for Jones to open that were “from Charlie.” We also made a huge point never to say we couldn’t do something with Jones because of the baby. For example, if I was feeding Charlie and Jones wanted to play, I would say ‘Mommy needs

five more minutes, then I can play with you.’ Never ‘I can’t play right now, I’m feeding Charlie.’ Jones loves his brother for the most part, but he is still testing boundaries with him. A hug can turn into a push really quick.” “The greatest challenge [of motherhood] for me, and something I am still very much working on, is time management. No matter how hard I try, one part of my life is always being neglected. Whether it be friends, family, my marriage, kids, or work. I am still trying to find how to do it all. I “ You realize how much a mom does and how much is sacrificed.” am doing it all, but definitely not all at the same time.” THE NAME GAME “Matt and I were lucky enough to both love the name Jones right away. We had a friend named Jones and we both loved it and barely even discussed any other options. We had a few other options with Charlie but ultimately loved how classic the name Charlie was and thought it fit well as the younger brother to Jones.”

SECOND PREGNANCY

“I was really lucky to have easy pregnancies with both boys. My delivery with Jones, on the other hand, was very traumatic. Jones had a huge head and I pushed for almost

three hours and ended up with third degree tears. Jones was in the NICU with a hematoma and I was in a wheelchair for the first week and had a very painful recovery. Luckily, what they say is true about the second. Charlie was a breeze— three pushes and only one stitch!

THE FOURTH TRIMESTER

“Nothing can ever prepare you for postpartum with your first child. It is the biggest transition I have ever experienced, both physically and emotionally. It’s shocking to me that more women don’t talk about how hard it is. Yes, of course you are so happy to finally meet your baby, and it is such a beautiful moment, but it is also extremely overwhelming. After I had Jones, I called my best friend from college who had two girls way before the rest of our friend group. I apologized for not being there for her more. I had no idea what she went through. It’s impossible to understand until you go though it yourself.

PERSONAL STYLE SHIFT

“I remember going though my closet and getting rid of all my “sexy” clothes when I was pregnant with Charlie. It took me over a year and a half to fit back into my pre-pregnancy jeans after Jones, and may-

be it was the hormones, but I thought, ‘I’m just never going to want to dress sexy again.’ One of my fears before I had kids was that I wouldn’t be considered “sexy” anymore after having kids. But I feel the total opposite. I feel more confident in my body than ever. I will never look the same as my 20-year-old self, but I’m OK with that, and so proud of what my body has been through and accomplished. I guess to answer the question, no, “After having I don’t think my style has changed much, and I’m wishkids, I feel more ing I never got rid of all of those sexy clothes.” confident in my COLD WEATHER body than ever.” UNIFORM “I’ve always been a denim girl. I love a good chunky sweater and jeans but over the past few years, I have also been loving knit dresses in the winter. They are so easy to throw on and layer under jackets and can easily go from day to night!”

THE INFLUENCER

“I’ve always had a love/hate relationship with that term. It’s become almost a derogatory term in some circles, but on the other hand, I love how it’s given so many people (including myself) a creative outlet and the opportunity to create a whole new career for themselves. I am so inspired and influenced by so many people on Instagram and TikTok and love that there are so many amazing people to follow and not just the mainstream ideas that used to be pushed

STANDING OUT ON SOCIAL

“Unfortunately I don’t think there is a formula on how to make it in social media. But what I have noticed from all the people who have done well is their ability to show their own perspective and be true to themselves. I think if you prioritize being authentic on social, the growth with follow.

RISE OF THE MOM-FLUENCER

“I think when you’re sharing your life on social and you have kids, it’s just a natural evolution. It’s been so fun growing with my followers over the years. So many of my friends and followers are having kids right now, so it’s been fun to go through the process together. I also plan on taking as many photos as I can now because I’m sure in a year or so, the boys won’t let me take any!”

MOM GUILT

“I experience mom guilt constantly. I find it’s also harder that I don’t have a traditional 9-5 job. My job is 24/7 and it’s hard to know when to turn it off. It’s crazy but I even feel guilty if I’m having too much fun at work, as if I should only be happy when I’m with my kids. But then I remind myself that I am teaching by example. I want my kids to do a job they love, and be excited, like I am, to go to work. I want to teach them a good work ethic and that hard work pays off.”

M I N I74 w i n t e r ‘22

ROCKY ON THE CLOCK

The Bright Side founder shares fast facts.

KIDS BOOK “Anything by Kobi Yamada.”

COFFEE ORDER “Cinnamon hazelnut French press with almond milk.”

KIDS MOVIE “Monsters Inc.”

NOW PLAYING

FAVE KIDS SHOPS “Smallable, Kith, Maisonette.” “Never Have I Ever, Yellowstone, and Sex Education.”

GUILTY PLEASURE “Cookies and truffle fries.”

LISTENING TO “Matt’s playlists.”

BEFORE KIDS “I never thought I would eat dinner at 5 PM.”

FAVE RESTAURANT