Peace of Mind

Why do we hold on?

By Anna Marie Frank

» OUR GLASS CAGE.

Life is funny. More often than not, we go about life “playing it safe,” which means, repressing your fears. You really give up a lot because you’re handcuffed to your fears that are paralyzing you, all in order to avoid facing those fears. I used to “play it safe” too, and only recently began to grasp the fact that by doing so, I’d put myself in a glass cage. I can see outward but can only go so far. I realize that so many others do the same thing and I wonder: Why do we do this?

I guess we think that if we don’t go to certain “dark” or “uncomfortable” places where the fear resides in our own minds, everything will be OK. We just have to stay in the glass cage and not cross certain boundaries. Wrong! The glass cage we have put ourselves in is a false safety zone and we are really not OK. Press too hard on the glass and it will break, and we all know how dangerous cut glass is. But what if we leave the glass cage behind? Maybe we’ll have greater success ... even fly! The fact is that the glass cage doesn’t serve us well.

As we become wiser, we realize that the very things we do to “play it safe” and “protect” ourselves are often the very things that harm us! The mechanisms of protection we layer ourselves with are varied. Repressing our fear is one way we try to protect ourselves. Think of how you may have held on to a relationship that no longer served you. Why did you hold on to it? Maybe because you feared the alternative of loss and being alone? But what if by letting go, you soon find yourself in a healthier, more compatible relationship? Interestingly, the truth is that holding on to fear creates blockages in your energy field. It also lowers your vibration, your frequency! Releasing negative energies (toxic people, things, thoughts, emotions) opens you up to receiving people, things, thoughts, emotions and opportunities that vibrate at a higher frequency.

We all vibrate at a specific frequency. The lower the frequency, the more heavy and dense the vibration is. The higher the frequency, the lighter and more energetic we feel. The good news is that we actually get to choose our frequency with our thoughts. Positive thoughts create a higher vibration. Negative thoughts and fearful thoughts create a denser, heavier frequency that weighs us down.

So, it is no wonder we get stuck in the glass cage. The not-so-good-news is that the longer we stay in the glass cage, the lower our frequency becomes and the heavier we feel. It’s what makes us feel stuck. But we never are really stuck; we just need to start thinking positive thoughts. That will raise our vibration and lighten us up so that we move forward.

Let’s take a simple example. Say you trip and fall. (I hope not!) You immediately start complaining. You tell everyone you know, “I started off the morning with a fall. What a crappy day! And I still hurt.” Chances are that as your day continues, it will unfold in the worst way. “I had the worst day today. The entire day was crap and everything was yucky! It started when I fell.” Soon your coworker is complaining about all the negative things in her life, too. Uhhhhh!!!! Now imagine that you fall and immediately get yourself back up, dust yourself off, grab some ice for your knee, maybe laugh at how clumsy you are. Then you go on with your day grateful that you’re OK and your injury wasn’t worse! This latter thought pattern keeps you vibrating at a higher frequency, which in turn attracts high vibrational energy. After all, like attracts like.

If we can all set our fear aside and realize that fear exists at a very low vibration that prevents us from flying high, we can start to break free from the glass cage we have put ourselves in.

Over the last two decades I had put myself in a glass cage. I told myself, “Just play it safe; get a job, get insurance, and blah-blah-blah.” But what if instead of just playing it safe, I had told myself, “Do what you love, help others, follow your purpose. Be who you are meant to be and be proud of who you are!” Wowzers!

If there had been a class we all could have taken as a kid that taught us to be free of our fears and fly … can you imagine? Instead, what we got was the fears of others projected onto us. So, from a very young age we are all programmed to be safe. “Play it safe, get a job, get insurance, and, by the way, government jobs are really super secure.”

That’s the stuff that was programmed into us. It’s what was programmed into me as far back as I remember. Why? Because my parents’ fears were being projected onto me. They feared not having enough, not having job security, not having insurance, and their fear became my fear. “Avoid doing what you love if it doesn’t include all these things!” Barf!

Well, I allowed my parents’ fears to drive me all of my adult life — until a few months ago. Now I actively remind myself that working for myself, doing what I love to do, and making a difference in the world, is OK! I mean — geez! — I have to remind myself and give myself permission to be the amazing human I was meant to be!

Reprogramming yourself takes time and work! It doesn’t happen overnight but it starts changing as soon as you recognize your glass cage and the programing that has been downloaded into you and your mind. So, please, use this as a reminder to be you, follow your passions, and break through that glass cage. The world deserves to have the true you. To free yourself you must find out who you truly are!

The opinions expressed in this column are those of Anna Marie Frank.

A SHOPPING AND ENTERTAINMENT CENTER

Visit your local neighborhood businesses and get to know the owners behind each brand of family-owned and operated favorites like Nutrishop, Lengthwise Pub, Rocket Fizz, and Just Wing It.

Nutrishop

Meet Howard and Michelle Kinnick, owners of the Bakersfield franchise Nutrishop. As Bakersfield natives who have always been passionate about health, nutrition and fitness, Howard and Michelle reinvented themselves to what they both felt fit their lives and followed their shared passion together to open Nutrishop Bakersfield in 2018. When visiting the Bakersfield location, customers will find either one or both Howard and Michelle, along with their two dogs, Chance and Shiloh, for assistance. Howard and Michelle love meeting new customers and having a mutual connection of getting healthy. Their best-selling items are the general health and wellness products, the monthly transformation challenges, and the complimentary lnBody Body Composition Analyzer. Customers will experience unparalleled service, with exclusive brands of cutting-edge nutritional supplements and guaranteed low prices. Stay up to date with monthly specials and new product alerts on Facebook and lnstagram, @NutrishopBakersfield. For more information, call 661-885-7444 or visit www.nutrishopbakersfield.com. Located at 9000 Ming Ave Suite T3, Bakersfield, CA 93311.

Lengthwise at The Marketplace

Meet Darin Schwicker, co-owner of Lengthwise at The Marketplace, a gastropub that features all the signature Lengthwise Brewery brews and a full, sought-after menu. With a combined 60 years of experience, co-owners Darin and Jeff Williams decided to open their third location at The Marketplace in the fall of 2012. As California State University, Bakersfield alumni, opening a location adjacent to the college campus simply made sense. The two have been lifelong friends with a love for good beer, good food, and great friendships. Decorated in reclaimed wood, stainless steel, and CSUB sports memorabilia, Lengthwise at The Marketplace is the perfect location for grabbing a bite before a movie or after a class. Customers will partake in the mix of handcrafted ales, modern pub professionalism, and Lengthwise's hometown atmosphere. For more information, call 661-665-2537 or visit www.lengthwise.com. Located at 9000 Ming Ave Suite T1, Bakersfield, CA 93311. Rocket Fizz

Meet Enrique and Maritza Ruiz, owners of the Bakersfield franchise Rocket Fizz, who will be celebrating their store's one year anniversary at The Marketplace on June 17, 2021. Prior to opening their business, Enrique and Maritza both served in the United States Marine Corps. They discovered Rocket Fizz through an Undercover Boss episode and decided to visit the national candy store themselves where they immediately fell in love with the experience of going down memory lane and decided they wanted a store of their own. The Marketplace Bakersfield location has over 2,000 different types of candy, over 500 flavors of soda pop including 50 different flavors of Root Beer and specializes in custom gift baskets that can include novelty candy, soda pop, gag gifts, tint signs, and more. Their best-selling items include their extensive variety of saltwater taffy in over 80 flavors, bottled cane sugar soda pop, tin signs, along with nostalgic candies such as Necco Wafers, Pop Rocks, BarNone Chocolate Bars, and Cherry Mash. For more information, call 661-564-8005 or visit www.rocketfizz.com. Located at 9000 Ming Ave Suite E4, Bakersfield, CA 93311.

Just Wing It

Meet Jerry and Charlene Stueve, owners of Just Wing It and Bakersfield franchise locations Cold Stone Creamery and Baja Fresh, all located within The Marketplace. The food service industry was a new concept to Jerry and Charlene, so they decided that owning a franchise business was the best way to start. In 2007, they took over Cold Stone Creamery, and Baja Fresh in 2011 . In 2015, Jerry and Charlene took over Just Wing It, where they have been able to create customized items such as their family recipe of bacon-wrapped jalapefios which has quickly become a customer favorite. Growing up in Bakersfield, their four children each had the opportunity to work in the family-run businesses gaining valuable work experience and cherished memories along the way. Jerry and Charlene have enjoyed building relationships with the Bakersfield community over the years and are grateful for the patience and tremendous support they received this past year. For more information, call 661-847-9464 or visit www.justwingitbakersfield.com. Located at 9000 Ming Ave Suite E5, Bakersfield, CA 93311.

FfndtheFun

AT THE MARKETPLACE BAKERSFIELD

The Marketplace Bakersfield is where you can find the best local eateries, shops and services. If you are looking to grab a quick bite to eat, enjoy quality time with friends and family, or find the perfect Father's Day gift, The Marketplace has everything you need and more.

Rocket Fizz

A Walk Down Memory Lane Relive your childhood with nostalgic candies and pass on the memories to your kids and grandkids. Rocket Fizz has something sweet for all generations.

Just Wing It

Your Go-To Sports Bar Enjoy quality time with friends and family while watching your favorite live sports entertainment.

From a variety of menu items including fresh wings, chicken strips, gourmet burgers, flatbread pizzas, and happy hour specials, Just

Wing It is an ultimate summer destination. Edwards Cinemas

Movies are Back! Celebrate with a friends or family day at the movies and catch the newest summer blockbuster. Sit back, relax and enjoy the show.

Lengthwise at The Marketplace

Bakersfield's Best Microbrewers With over 20 brews on tap and an extensive food menu, Lengthwise is the perfect location to visit after a long day of shopping, before your movie, or to celebrate a passing grade. Plan your summer nights here and make unforgettable memories with friends and family.

Tahoe Joe's Famous Steakhouse

Dinner for Two for $60 Ditch the kitchen and order from his favorite local steakhouse. Start with an appetizer to share, then choose between Joe's Steak, Prime Rib, or Joe's Style Roasted Chicken, and finish with a slice of Nevada Cheesecake. Nutrishop

YourHealthiest Summer Yet Enjoy the sun and take your workout outside! Whether you are just getting started with your fitness journey or are an experienced fitness enthusiast, Nutrishop is committed to assisting customers in getting desired results through top-quality nutritional supplements.

Home to over 50 great shops and eateries featuring VONS, RITE AID, EDWARDS CINEMAS, WILLIAMS SONOMA, ULTA BEAUTY, TALBOTS

9000 Ming Avenue, Bakersfield, CA 93311 • TheMarketplaceBakersfield.com Text Bakersfield to 66866 for exclusive offers