OUT Voting 101: 2016 General Election
BY BILL REDMOND-PALMER Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you know that election day is just on the horizon – speci cally on Tuesday, November 8th. Voting this year is more important than ever, and easier than ever. First and foremost, you must be registered in Maryland in order to vote. • Register with a community organization such as the GLCCB, who will be assisting voters with registration (2530 North Charles Street, third oor). For more info call 410-7778145. • Register online with at Maryland’s Online Voter Registration System (OLVR), at Voterservices.elections.maryland.gov/OnlineVoterRegistration/InstructionsStep1. If using the OLVR, you have until 9 p.m. on October 18th to submit your application. Register same-day at any early voting site. Just visit any early voting site, bring your Maryland State issued identi cation, or if you
Hillary Clinton
do not have one, other documentation to verify your identity and address, such as your paycheck, bank statement, utility bill, or other government document with your name and new address, and they will be able to register you. Please note that same-day registration will be available only during early voting, and you will not be able to register on November 8th. Register in person at any of the following government agencies, on or before October 18th: your local board of elections; the State Board of Elections; the Department of Health and Mental Hygiene; the Department of Social Services; the Motor Vehicle Administration (MVA); Of ces on Aging; the MTA Paratransit Certi cation Of ce; all public institutions of higher education; recruitment of ces of the U.S. Armed Forces; marriage license of ces; and of ces for students with disabilities at all Maryland colleges and universities. The deadline to register is October 18th,
Philadelphia Gay News reached out to the Democratic and Republican candidates for president, Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump, to discuss LGBT issues in advance of next month’s election. Clinton provided PGN this exclusive op-ed detailing her LGBT-rights record and her goals for future LGBT-equality efforts. The offer remains open for Trump. This is the first time a major-party presidential candidate has written an op-ed for an LGBT newspaper.
Hilllary makes a pitch to the LGBT community
October 14, 2016 Volume XIV, Issue 12
2016, for the presidential general election. If you haven’t yet registered, you have several options: When you are ready to cast your vote, your best option, with the shortest waiting time, is to participate in early voting. Early voting begins on Thursday, October 27, and continues each day through Thursday, November 3, 2016, at six sites around Baltimore City, and at sites in each county throughout the state of Maryland. For both early voting and the general election day, polls are open from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. Baltimore early voting sites are as follows: • Westside Skills Center (4501 Edmondson Avenue). Enter the rear of the building via Athol Avenue. • The League for People with Disabilities (1111 East Coldspring Lane). • Maritime Industries Academy School
#431 (5001 Sinclair Lane). Use the rear entrance, accessed via Truesdale Avenue. • Public Safety Training Center (3500 West Northern Parkway). Enter on Manhattan Avenue. • Southeast Anchor Library (3601 Eastern Avenue). • University of Maryland at Baltimore, Community Engagement Center (1 North Poppleton Street). Be sure to note, that it is very important to vote at an Early Voting Site in the jurisdiction in which you live. If you live in Baltimore City, you will be able to vote for all of the candidates connected to your residence, at any early voting site located in the city. If, however you attempt to vote at a site in Baltimore County, you will only be allowed to —continued on page 3
Dem Presidential Candidate Addresses LGBT Equality BY HILLARY CLINTON More than half a century ago, at Independence Hall, participants at the first Annual Reminder march picketed, chanted and sang. They did this to show their fellow Philadelphians that the LGBT community lacked fundamental civil rights. In the decades since those protests, our country has come a long way. Marriage equality is the law of the land. This year, the last state law prohibiting same-sex couples from adopting was finally struck
down. And President Obama signed an executive order protecting federal workers from discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity. We should celebrate that progress. But the simple truth is that even now, in 2016, there are still too many states in America where LGBT people can be fired or evicted from their home because of who they are or who they love. Pennsylvania is one of them. Here, you can get married on —continued on page 12
ARE YOU AN LGBT ADULT OVER 50 OR A CAREGIVER? Join us for an upcoming SAGECAP Lunch & Learn & get information, resources, & support (as well as a free lunch!)
to make the years ahead healthier & easier... Hope to see you there!
(By the way: did we mention lunch is provided?)
WHEN: Every Second Thursday, 12PM to 1:30PM WHERE: Chase Brexton Health Care, Mt. Vernon Center Community Rooms
NOVEMBER 10, 2016
DECEMBER 8, 2016
Know the 10 Signs of Dementia
Coping with the Holidays: Stress Management & Self-Care
Presented by: Alzheimer’s Association of Central Maryland
Presented by: Jon Gorman, PsyD Chase Brexton Health Care
RSVP:
lgbt@chasebrexton.org 410-837-2050 x1216 SAGEUSA.ORG RESOURCECENTER.LGBT 2t
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The LGBT Health Resource Center
NEWS // LOCAL
Approved February 29, 2016
Voting 101: 2016 General Election —continued from page 1 vote provisionally, they will not be able to offer you a ballot that includes all the candidates you should normally be able to vote for, and all of your choices will not be counted. To nd early voting sites outside of Balti-
more City, visit the Maryland State Board of Elections website at Elections.state.md.us/ voting/early_voting.html. For information about any other aspects of voting in Maryland, visit Elections.state. md.us. t
JOHNS HOPKINS UNIVERSITY SCHOOL OF MEDICINE CENTER FOR LEARNING AND HEALTH
IF YOU ARE LIVING WITH HIV, YOU MAY BE ELIGIBLE FOR THIS STUDY YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE IN MEDICAL CARE TO QUALIFY
Law Office of David M. Lutz, P.A. •Auto Accidents
•Workers’ Compensation
•Personal Injury
•DUI/DWI
•Criminal Defense
•Traffic Court
Se Habla Español
1901 Fleet Street Baltimore, MD 21231 Phone: 410-558-3700 (English) 410-299-2898(Español) E-mail: LawLutz@aol.com www.lawlutz.com
WHAT CAN YOU GET IN THE STUDY? • We will refer you to medical care if needed • Learn the benefits of taking HIV medications • Earn up to $1,030 for completing assessments • Some people may earn up to $7,300 over 2 years for providing blood samples that show that they take HIV medications regularly HOW CAN YOU APPLY FOR THE STUDY? Call the Center for Learning and Health at
1-866-857-9851 Principal Investigator: Kenneth Silverman, Ph.D. Protocol Number: IRB00044740
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Scholarships Available for AIDSWatch 2017 BY BILL REDMOND-PALMER AIDSWatch is the largest annual national event focused on HIV policy in the U.S. The event draws hundreds of people living with HIV and their allies to Washington, D.C., for two days to educate Congress about the important issues at stake for people living with HIV/AIDS. The event is presented by the Elizabeth Taylor AIDS Foundation (Elizabethtayloraidsfoundation.org), and is implemented as a partnership between AIDS United (Aidsunited.org), the Treatment
Attendees at AIDSWatch 2016
Access Expansion Project (Taepusa.org), and the U.S. People Living With HIV Caucus (Hivcaucus.org). The 2017 AIDSWatch will take place on March 27th and 28th, 2017 in Washington D.C. During the event, participants will receive training on current science, legislative priorities, and how to conduct effective meetings with their elected representatives. A total of 50 hotel and travel scholarships will be offered to prospective attendees. Scholarship applications are due October 31st. Awardees will be selected and notified in January. Travel accommodations will include two nights (March 26th and 27th) at the Washington Marriot Georgetown along with travel costs. Find out more at Aidsunited.org/AIDSWatch/Scholarship-Application.aspx or email aidswatch@ aidsunited.org. t
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2016 Intersex Awareness Day BY BILL REDMOND-PALMER October 26th is designated Intersex Awareness Day (IAD), and November 8th, the Intersex Day of Remembrance bringing attention to the challenges faced by intersex people, and to end shame, secrecy, and the unwanted genital cosmetic surgeries on intersex children aimed at making them appear male or female before they are old enough to understand or consent. It’s a time of reflection, education, and advocacy, when we can all learn more about intersex people and the home that some of them find in the greater queer community. Intersex people are often ignored, mis-categorized, and misunderstood. This can add insult to injury, to people who are often denied even the basic right to self-definition, information, and knowledge, and who are sometimes forced to undergo damaging medical and psychological procedures. Most commonly, even by LGBT people, intersex people are incorrectly assumed to identify as transgender, are sometimes rejected as gay or lesbian, labeled as hermaphrodites, dismissed as abnormal, or as examples of gender gone wrong. None of these are accurate, and all are deeply pejorative attitudes held about intersex people that can add to their feelings of isolation. Plainly stated, intersex is a variation in sex characteristics including chromosomes, gonads, and / or genitals that do not allow an individual to be distinctly identified as male or female. Intersex is always
can be diagnosed at any time from birth to adulthood, and have sometimes been known to live their whole lives without ever knowing or being told of their intersex status. Intersex infants, children and even adults endure non-consensual surgical and hormonal interventions to fit into a more socially acceptable embodiment of being male or female. This may be at the behest of their parents, and / or physician / clinical pressure toward the parents. Such treatments may even involve sterilization. In most countries being intersex is not seen as a natural attribute, rather than an “aberration,” which justifies the above procedures. In short, being intersex often isn’t recognized as a human right at all, unlike sexual orientation and gender identity. Here’s a few basic facts you need to know about being intersex: • Intersex people’s sexual organs line up in a slightly different way. • It’s almost as common as being born a redhead. • There are more than 30 intersex conditions that can affect a person’s hormones. • People can find out about their condition at any age. • Sometimes doctors can tell why someone is intersex, sometimes they can’t. • Ask an intersex person what they would like be called, as there are a few different terms: intersex or differences of sex development (DSD). • Intersex kids often feel the same isolation as LGBT kids. • Intersex kids can be themselves and live happy, normal lives. For more information about the Intersex Awareness Day, visit Intersexday.org and Facebook.com/intersexday. t
Legends and Young’uns 2016 Conference congenital, and can originate from genetic, chromosomal, or hormonal variations, and may be a combination of all three elements. Environmental influences such as endocrine disruptors can also play a role in some intersex differences. Intersex people
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BY BILL REDMOND-PALMER The 11th annual Legends and Young’uns Conference – with the theme this year of “Phenomenal women living longer with the challenge of HIV,” is set for Wednesday, October 26th at Morgan State University. This full-day regional conference will address the unique issues of women living
with the challenge of HIV/AIDS, both those perinatally infected and those newly diagnosed, who they refer to as the “Young’uns,” as well as those living well and aging up in their senior years, who they refer to as the “Legends.” Experts in the field will provide current information pertaining to the treatment and management of HIV/AIDS in women, including prevention, education, testing, life skills and resource information. The target audiences for this conference are nurses, social workers, outreach workers, counselors, case managers, and women living with HIV. The conference runs from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. in the Morgan State University Calvin and Tina Tyler Ballroom in the University Student Center on the 2nd Floor (1700 East Coldspring Lane). If coming by taxi or mobility van, use 303 University Center as the address. The conference is presented by the Johns Hopkins University AIDS Education Training Center (AETC) and Older Women Embracing Life (OWEL), in collaboration with Morgan State University School of Community Health and Policy. There is no fee but interested people with HIV can register by October 21st at Drive.google.com/file/d/0BxptqWw3mgKtYk5BZ1RLWDJROU0/view?usp=sharing. Health professionals can register at Maaetc.org/events/view/8182. For more information, contact Dorcas Baker (443-287-4779) or Carolyn Massey (301-725-7899 or masseyc2002@yahoo. com). t
The 2017 Baltimore Pride Committee Wants You! BY BILL REDMOND-PALMER Pride 2016 is a fading memory, and the current members of the planning committee for Baltimore Pride have already met to begin planning for next year’s events. At the top of their agenda, is to recruit new members to help with planning Baltimore Pride 2017. There are opportunities for participation at multiple commitment levels, from committee chair, to community
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October 15th Focuses Attention on Latinos & AIDS BY BILL REDMOND-PALMER The “National Latinx AIDS Awareness Day” (NLAAD), held annually on October 15, brings together community-based organizations, Latino leaders, health departments, and elected officials to HIV awareness – as well as on critical health issues such as viral hepatitis, sexually transmitted infections, and tuberculosis. According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), of the ten primary populations impacted by HIV infection, Latino men who have sex with men are the third largest, following white and black men who have sex with men. NLAAD was founded in 2003 as a joint effort of the Latino Commission on AIDS and Hispanic Federation, with October 15th chosen to coincide with the last day of Hispanic Heritage Month.
liaison, to basic volunteer, and there are numerous areas of interest, with something sure to suit everyone. Two subcommittees work to support all Pride related events, including the Arts & Communication Committee, that works to develop creative designs and logos for various mediums, and coordinates all the communication with the community about all the Pride events. The Volunteer Committee recruits and coordinates volunteers to support the various events at all levels. Three subcommittees provide support to the Parade, Block Party and Festival in Druid Hill Park. The Logistics Committee plans all the event details, many behind the scenes, ranging from permits to tables and tents, to makes sure that Pride runs smoothly. The Security Committee makes sure all those events, and everyone who attends, has a safe experience. The Entertainment Committee plans and coordinates the entertainment on all the events stages, for everyone’s enjoyment. The Block Party and Festival are served by two other committees. The Vendor Committee recruits and coordinates the vendors for both events, and the Bars Committee, plans and manages the alco-
NLAAD is coordinated by the Latino Commission on AIDS, which provides local groups with resources, and which then in turn plan events and awareness campaigns to address the local epidemic. Since its establishment, NLAAD has solidified support from 450 partners who together, organize more than 150 events across the U.S. During 2015, NLAAD distributed 5,000 HIV testing kits, disseminated Facebook ads which had over 1 million impressions and over 11 thousand clicks; distributed over 4,000 NLAAD posters; and broadcasted a radio PSA to over 250 Spanish language radio networks, reaching over 11.5 million listeners. For more information, visit Nlaad. com and Aids.gov/news-and-events/ awareness-days/latino. t
hol bars at the events. Two other subcommittees are focused on specific events. The Parade Committee, deals with planning and coordinating all the aspects of the Pride Parade. The Youth Pride Committee, plans and coordinates the Youth Pride event, a safe and alcohol-free space held on Saturday during Pride weekend, in conjunction with the Block Party. The final committee is the Events & Outreach Committee that serves to connect to various constituencies within the LGBT Community. This committee coordinates and assists in the development of events and activities during Pride Week that connect to the interests and needs of those groups, ranging from educational to faith-based to social and everywhere in between. The Pride Committee plans to meet on the first and third Wednesdays of each month at the GLCCB. Anyone interested in helping to plan Baltimore Pride 2017, should contact Mimi Demissew at the GLCCB at 410-777-8145, or email volunteers@glccb.org or volunteers@baltimorepride.org for more info – and to see how your talents can best make next year’s Pride the best ever! t BALTIMORE OUTLOUD OCTOBER 14, 2016 • BALTIMOREOUTLOUD.COM t
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BEYOND THE BELTWAY compiled by Jim Becker
British researchers say they are close to HIV cure London, England – British scientists say they are close to a “full cure” for HIV. Researchers from Oxford, Cambridge, Imperial College London, University College London, and King’s College London have been developing a new HIV treatment that not only knocks down active viruses but also seeks out and destroys dormant HIV. Existing antiretroviral therapies (ARTs) can control HIV so effectively that viral load in patients becomes undetectable, but HIV can still exist in dormant form in patients’ T-cells. That means that patients must be on ART for the rest of their lives, otherwise they risk reactivation of the infection. The new therapy combines conventional ART meds with drugs designed to activate dormant HIV so it can also be destroyed. “This is one of the rst serious attempts at a full cure for HIV. We are exploring the real possibility of curing HIV,” added Mark Samuels, managing director at the Health Research Of ce for Clinical Research Infrastructure. “This is a huge challenge, and it’s still in its early days, but the progress has been remarkable,” he said. So far only 50 patients have participated in the British study, but at least one patient has reported no detectable HIV virus, an outcome described as “remarkable” by the researchers. Scientists cautioned that the result may be caused by conventional ART and that they declined to proclaim their trial a success. Even if the cure does work in a research setting, a treatment based on the ndings will be a “long way off,” says Professor Sarah Fidler, a consultant physician at Imperial College. “This therapy is speci cally designed to
These news notes have been compiled, with permission, from the online version of various newspapers and other web sites. We thank these publications for allowing us to bring you their news stories. Usually the reports have been signi cantly edited and you can read the full story by going to the web site mentioned following the item. Comments are strictly the opinions of Jim Becker and not of Baltimore oUtloUd or Pride Media.
clear the body of all HIV viruses, including dormant ones,” she said. “It has worked in the laboratory and there is good evidence it will work in humans too, but we must stress we are still a long way from any actual therapy. We will continue with medical tests for the next ve years, and at the moment we are not recommending stopping ART, but in the future, depending on the test results, we may explore this.” (Seattle Gay News – Mike Andrew at Sgn.org) Protesting alleged racism in gay Philly
Protests center on racism in Philly’s gay neighborhood Philadelphia, Pennsylvania – The local LGBT community continues to organize to address allegations of racism in the Philadelphia gay neighborhood, days after video surfaced of a local club owner using racial epithets. The Youtube video of ICandy owner Darryl DePiano set off a frenzy of protests and calls for boycotts, coming on the heels of allegations of racist dress-code policies at Gayborhood locales like ICandy and Woody’s. DePiano con rmed he made the comments three years ago and apologized on his personal and ICandy’s Facebook pages. He also made a statement about the issue on stage Saturday night at the club. But his remarks have not quelled the backlash. On September 29th, Black and Brown Workers Collective organized a protest at the bar. The next day, Philadelphia Gay News announced Friday it would no longer accept advertising from the club, or sponsor events held there. Leadership of the City of Brotherly Love Softball League voted unanimously over the weekend to suspend its relationship with ICandy for two years. Philly Pride Presents also announced the club would no longer be promoted as a sponsor of the October 9th OutFest and will not have its usual outdoor presence at OutFest. The Philadelphia Commission on Human Relations will hold a formal hearing to address complaints about such policies October 25th. All Gayborhood bar owners have been subpoenaed and to bring with them “dress codes, employment policies, nondiscrimination policies, training manuals, and any other rules or policies governing the provision of services to patrons,” according to a PCHR news release. The announcement of the hearing came the day the video of DePiano was made public, but Of ce of LGBT Af-
fairs director Nellie Fitzpatrick said plans for the hearing were already in the works. “The video will absolutely be part of the hearing ... but the hearing is a result of the system working,” Fitzpatrick told PGN. “It’s a result of people ling complaints and the Commission on Human Relations stepping up to have a public hearing to do their job.” BBWC has targeted Fitzpatrick and demanded her resignation after she responded to list of demands that the group found unsatisfactory. One of the demands was for compensation community members of color who advise the Of ce of LGBT Affairs on racism in the Gayborhood. Fitzgerald told PGN her of ce has an operating budget of $0 and that no city agencies monetarily compensate members of the public who advise them on community issues. (Philadelphia Gay News – Jen Colletta at Epgn.com)
The Group serves AfricanAmerican HIVpositive gay men Dallas, Texas – “I look for the need, and then try to nd a way to ll that need,” says Auntjuan Wiley, who has been a soldier in the battle against HIV and AIDS in Dallas for more than a quarter of a century. It was about 12 years ago, he says, that he became acutely aware that there was no safe space in his city for African-American men who have sex with men – MSMs – to get together to talk about their lives, their struggles and their victories. “It took a couple of years. I always wait to hear from the universe, and it took me a couple of years to hear from the universe on this,” Wiley, the head of AIDS Walk South Dallas, explains. But when he did hear that call, he answered quickly. And on October 12th, 2006, The Group held its rst meeting. The Group, Wiley explains, is a place for
black MSMs to gather for “support, empowerment, and education.” Over the last ten years, more than 100 men have participated. The Group meets on the second and fourth Thursdays of each month. Meeting places are not publicized. Anyone who is interested in attending can call him directly for information. Wiley says about 15 to 20 men attend each meeting. At the second Thursday meetings, “we focus on a topic, one of the ones the group has chosen in advance. The fourth Thursday meetings are “open discussion” meetings. It’s an opportunity for the men to just talk. They talk about what’s going on in their lives, what’s going on in the world. Once a month, The Group’s members get together for Social Saturday at a member’s home to talk, to eat, play card games. The Group has been so successful that founder Auntjuan Wiley saw the need to offer similar opportunities to a wider range of men. Thus was born The Strength Conference for Men Living With HIV. “I was getting so many calls from men who didn’t meet the demographic for The Group, but who wanted something like it. So I wanted to offer something for all HIV-positive men, something with the same basis as The Group – support, empowerment and education,” Wiley says. The Strength Conference, Wiley says, is “the only conference of this type in the U.S. serving all HIV-positive men. Last year, the rst Strength Conference drew 54 men. This year, Wiley says, he is expecting to see about 100 men attend the second annual Strength Conference, set for November 11th to 13th at Embassy Suites Love Field. The weekend begins with check-in and a speaker to welcome participants on Friday. Saturday will be lled with break-out sessions, education seminars and plenary speakers. Among those speaking at the event will be Robert Suttle from the Sero Project, who will discuss HIV criminalization; Will Horn with Cosmopolitan Congregation of Dallas, who will discuss faith-based elements of living with HIV; David Wiley of Nashville, who will talk about successful relationships in a heteronormative society; and Jeremy Teal, who will talk about disclosing one’s HIV status. Wiley asks for a $50 donation from participants, and that nominal fee covers everything from the hotel room – “Everyone has to have a roommate” – to the food to speakers to special events. And for those who want to attend but just can’t pay the $50, some scholarships are available. “We have an amazing list of really phenomenal sponsors in this community who are stepping forward to make this happen,” Wiley notes. (Dallas Voice – Tammye Nash at Dallasvoice.com)
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THINKING OUTLOUD
Quill Pen
Soul
Nicole Bettis
Breaking Point There once were two men stranded in a little wooden boat. For many days they coasted in what seemed to be the direction of land and safety. One day the wind was particularly unforgiving, and it rocked the ocean so fiercely that one of the men fell overboard. The other man quickly grabbed the only piece of rope they had and tossed it as far as he could into the ocean without losing his grip. The drowning man struggled against the waves and somehow grabbed the other end of the rope – and it broke. This year has been hard, for all of us. I think I’ve shed more tears in 2016 than in a long while, not just for my own personal circumstances but for humanity. As a whole
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we’re failing – our children, our communities, and ourselves. After being constantly bombarded with this steady, poisonous stream of negativity – social media, news, and TV – I’d reached my breaking point. On April 12th, 2015 a very violent arrest left young Freddie Gray unable to even stand up on his own. There were six of cers involved in his death … well y’all know the rest. Anyway, yes, I could literally feel the energy draining from my body as the death toll continued to rise. Newsfeeds, timelines, podcast, nail salons, grocery stores: every place I went, it was there. It was always the number-one topic of discussion. It was always heated and sad. Intense and passionate, but never solution-based, never. My re ection didn’t even look the same – bright eyes now tired and dim. Sleep became my only refuge. I couldn’t ght anymore. Peace cannot be achieved from war; genocide, cultural devastation, loss – so much loss. In the end there is nothing left to build from but hate, resentment, and pain. Anti-anything naturally brings more of that thing into our experiences. Think about it: since the pronouncement of the “war on drugs” ... what have you noticed? More drugs. How about the “war on guns”? More guns. The list goes on and on, and it gets deeper. What I’m trying to stress is that undeniable fact that, as I said, anti-anything naturally brings more of that thing into our experience. It’s focused on constantly. We constantly think about what we don’t want, what we don’t like, what we don’t need etc. What if we concentrated the opposite? Focusing only what we want, what we do like, what we need. We would spend much more time changing things for the better; we would do things and say things that are bene cial to the situation at hand and that would contribute to what it is we want. The struggling man grabbed a hold of the broken piece, with both hands and yelled out in defeat. In an instant, the man still inside the boat scrambled to his feet and yelled out over the storm to his fallen comrade, “You must reach beyond the break!” Without hesitation, the struggling man let go of the broken piece of rope and grasped the remaining piece … they both lived. We have to reach beyond the break in our consciousness and in our hearts (or whatever life experience we’ve had that’s broken our spirits) and grab a hold of the last piece of hope that we still have left. No matter how small it is, we must hold it tight. Letting go of any fear or hate and focus on nothing but our grip. For if we let go, we will lose everything. t
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Dem Presidential Candidate Addresses LGBT Equality —continued from page 1 Sunday and fired on Monday, just for being gay or transgender. That goes against everything we stand for as a country. We need to act on the federal level to take on discrimination in all its forms. That’s what I’ll do as president – with your help. But first, we have to win this election. Donald Trump must not be elected president. He would rip away so much of the progress we’ve made. He would appoint Supreme Court justices who would overturn marriage equality and rescind many of President Obama’s executive orders – including those protecting LGBT people. It’s not just Trump’s policies that reveal the kind of president he would be. So does his choice of running mate. Mike Pence is one of the most anti-LGBT public officials in America. As governor of Indiana, Pence supported a bill that legalized discrimination against LGBT people. As a member of Congress, he voted against expanding the definition of hate crimes to include sexual orientation and gender identity. He opposed the repeal of “Don’t ask, don’t tell,” saying doing so would be “social experimentation.” And he’s said that homosexuality would bring about “societal collapse.” That’s why the stakes in this election are so high. If I’m fortunate enough to be elected president, I’ll protect the progress we’ve fought so hard to achieve – and I’ll keep fighting until every American can live free from discrimination and prejudice. That means working to pass the Equality Act. It would finally provide LGBT people full federal nondiscrimination protections in housing, employment and so much more. I know that differences of opinion on LGBT equality still exist in the hearts of some Americans, but they should not exist under our laws. As president, I’ll be your partner in bringing about the vision of the inclusive nation that advocates, activists and allies have been seeking for decades. I also believe we must address the ongoing issue of violence against the LGBT community. LGBT people are now more likely than any other group to be the target of a hate crime. America saw the effects of hate in Orlando, with the attack on the Pulse
nightclub – the deadliest mass shooting by a single person in our history. The danger is compounded for LGBT people of color, who face intersectional pressures and dangers, particularly transgender people of color. Last year, more than 20 transgender women were killed in America. Recently, three were murdered right here in Philadelphia. We need to stop the violence and save LGBT lives. We need to collect more data around gender identity and sexual orientation in hate crimes, so we can stop them in a smarter, more effective way. And we need to finally pass common-sense reforms to address the gun violence epidemic. Along with the vast majority of Americans, I believe that we can protect the rights of law-abiding gun owners while still making sure that guns don’t fall into the wrong hands. Finally, we need to continue our fight to achieve our goal of an AIDS-free generation. HIV and AIDS still disproportionately impact gay and bisexual men, communities of color, transgender people and young people. We need to increase research, expand the use of effective prevention medications like PrEP, cap out-of-pocket drug costs and reform outdated HIV-criminalization laws. Like many, I’ve lost friends and loved ones to AIDS. We owe it to them – the people we love and miss, and the people whose names we’ll never know – to continue this fight. As first lady and senator, I fought to significantly expand funding for AIDS research. As Secretary of State, I changed the rules so that State Department employees in same-sex relationships were treated the same as their colleagues and so that transgender Americans could obtain passports that reflected their true gender identity. So these fights aren’t new to me. And as president, I’ll keep fighting for LGBT rights, because – as I told the world in one of the most important speeches I gave as secretary – they are human rights. And I won’t quit until all our laws reflect that basic reality. t
THINKING OUTLOUD
Truth & Love
Outreach
Rev. Jeffrey D. Harris
It’s the Q in Me Hello! My name is ... well the truth is, my name is not as important as this story! Anyway, Jeremy it is. But more than that, I hope this helps that young gay boy, lesbian girl or trans-person to accept themselves and know there is nothing wrong with them. Life for me has always been strange; heck I’m strange! I didn’t know it then but in retrospect, “weird” is the word I would have chosen. My garb, fun – ky! I never knew what to expect from me and neither should anyone else. Today it was Goth, then prep, then punk; that’s how I presented my fashion and my gamut of emotions. However, I loved my varied styles, the “Goth look,” although it didn’t always go well because my skin is extremely dark. Can you imagine a really dark teen in an oversized black trench coat and all these chains hanging off? Baggy black pants with a black mail bag or duffel? Black boots and oh, I almost forgot, the black lipstick with the dark eyeliner? That’s a fashion no-no, for me but it went with the style. And the “locals” – can you say “shameless”? That’s what I call them. No matter what time of day, I could always find them doing the same thing. Either standing on the corner, about five to ten deep or inside the Chinese store; not buying anything just there taking up space and sucking up air. Even when I went to school and came home they were still “posted up” in either location. I wondered if any of them had ever been off the block or out of the neighborhood. However, the “locals” laughing me to scorn was the daily routine. If not for my style of dress, it was for the darkness of my skin. Anyway, a 15-year-old black kid with spiked reddish hair or even blond hair living in the heart of Baltimore’s East Side. You can imagine the stares and violent insults I got as I waited for the bus to get for school or just to meet up with friends. The insults whirled at me were heart-wrenching and unbearable – being called: gay, fag, queen, punk, sissy or even a bottom boy. I thought many times “How can people speak so mean about someone they don’t know?” My mental consolation was “They’re the locals! Who cares what they think?” It still hurt though.
The really strange part, I came from an awesome family, with great manners and intelligence, and my parents are devout Christians. They are very grassroots, but educated and hard workers. Mom is an epidemiologist at a local hospital, while my dad is a blue-collar worker who worked his way to upper level management with a sizeable raise, his own secretary, and an elaborate office. They met junior year of college and the rest is history. My siblings and I were reared to have much respect for our elders and even people we didn’t know. Every Sunday morning my family went to church and my mom would ask me to go. But she not 15 no more so … I got enough problems, so I decline. You ever had that strange feeling that this day is going to be interesting? Not sure what or how but just a feeling. Well, I woke this morning and had that feeling. It started off good and then, well…. The bell rang to change class and my next period was gym. My good buddy Samuel came to chat for a few. His class was immediately before mine. Sam normally stayed around later to work out and do the “jock” thing. t To be continued next issue.
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BALTIMORE OUTLOUD OCTOBER 14, 2016 • BALTIMOREOUTLOUD.COM t
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QUALITY OF LIFE
Ask
Dr. J
Janan Broadbent, Ph.D.
Imbalance in a Relationship Have you been in a relationship where one partner was more successful, or made more money, or was busier than the other? This could happen in a friendship and between siblings in a family as well. Perhaps where this is most difficult is when one person has more power than the other. If the power imbalance exists when both people are in the same venue, then there may be ethical concerns. For example, a supervisor and an employee, or a teacher and a student may be prohibited from having a relationship by workplace rules or ethics. Nonetheless, I have known couples that disregarded such restrictions where matters of the heart are concerned. So one may ask: How do these relationships survive? Going back to the 1967 classic by Thomas Harris, I m OK – You re Ok, there are numerous self-help books that address the issue of balance in relationships. Taking note of the body’s tendency for homeostasis, our connections seem to thrive when there is a sense of compatibility in how we perceive each other. It is no longer the case that a submissive partner thrives
with a dominant one: Our understanding of equality supports the need for balance. So what happens when, indeed, one partner is more successful or more powerful? The key to making such a relationship function lies in communication. By all means, put the issue on the table. Pretending it doesn’t exist exacerbates the problem. Set up a time to discuss how you each feel. It is not always true that the more successful /powerful likes the situation either. It may be as uncomfortable for both partners to live with the reality. However, communicating about each other’s needs will start a resolution to the imbalance, given honest talks and mature discussions. Finding the sweet spot between dependence versus independence is where this issue becomes crucial. Prolonged dependence by one on another inevitably breeds resentment, except when we are children. Even then, as the child starts to develop, asserting independence becomes paramount. So in a relationship, we have to look at where we can depend on each other in a healthy manner. That area is in the realm of emotions and in a reciprocal manner. There, we run into the balance phenomenon. If you rely on me for all of your emotional support, but disappear when I need the same, the end result is predictable: One day, if I am mentally healthy, I will be unavailable. The following quote brings a visual image that illustrates the concept of balance clearly: “Just as your car runs more smoothly and requires less energy to go faster and farther when the wheels are in perfect alignment, you perform better when your thoughts, feelings, emotions, goals, and values are in balance.” – Brian Tracy t
“Prolonged dependence by one on another inevitably breeds resentment, except when we are children.”
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The Law & You
Lee Carpenter
If Your Spouse is Not a U.S. Citizen You’ve met the man or woman of your dreams, you’ve fallen in love, and you’ve gotten married. Because same-sex marriage is now legal nationwide, the laws and regulations that apply to married straight couples will apply to you as well. But if you or your spouse is not a U.S. citizen, these rules might not be what you would expect when it comes to receiving gifts or inheriting from each other. When both marriage partners are U.S. citizens, they enjoy the right to give each other unlimited amounts tax-free. Want to title the beach house in your spouse’s name? Not a problem. There will be no gift taxes to worry about. But if your spouse is a noncitizen, your gifts to him or her will have to be reported to the IRS if they exceed $148,000.00 in value in a given year. (This amount, called the “annual exclusion,” is adjusted each year for in ation.) The rule is similar when one spouse dies. Under the “marital deduction,” a U.S. citizen can inherit an unlimited amount from his deceased spouse with no tax liability. But if the surviving spouse is not a U.S. citizen – even if he is a permanent U.S. resident – taxes will be due if the estate exceeds $2 million in value in Maryland or $5.45 million at the federal level. Couples at this asset level can delay having to pay estate taxes using a qualied domestic trust (QDOT). When the citizen spouse dies, his estate goes into the QDOT, rather than to the surviving spouse. As the only bene ciary, the non-citizen spouse receives distributions of income from the trust for the remainder of his life. No estate taxes will be due on the distribu-
tions, although income taxes will be. Then, upon the death of the second spouse, the assets left in trust go to the couple’s children, or to other bene ciaries named in the trust agreement. QDOTs are an effective way to enable a spouse who is a U.S. citizen to provide for one who isn’t while minimizing estate taxes. The one additional concern in Maryland is that the state doesn’t recognize QDOTs. As a result, if the estate of the citizen spouse exceeds $2 million in value, any assets beyond the $2 million exemption will be subject to the Maryland estate tax, even if a QDOT is established. This tax liability should be taken into account to ensure that the surviving spouse is suf ciently provided for. If this all sounds complicated, that’s because it is. If you or your spouse is not a U.S. citizen, talk to an estates and trusts attorney with experience in this area. Taking action now may be essential in order to avoid an unexpected tax bill when one of you is gone. Another option is simply to pursue citizenship for the noncitizen spouse. The rst step under this approach is to obtain a green card, which veri es an individual’s status as a lawful permanent resident in the U.S. It also allows the bearer to live and work in the country inde nitely. Green cards are most often granted based on a familial relationship with an American citizen, which now includes same-sex spouses. After living in the U.S. for a certain number of years, a green card holder may qualify for citizenship status through the naturalization process. The general residency requirement is ve years, but for an applicant who has been married to a U.S. citizen during that period, it’s only three years. Obtaining citizenship won’t eliminate the need for an estate plan, but it can reduce estate taxes dramatically. Frank Hubbard once quipped that marrying for money is the most dif cult way to get rich. He might have gone on to say that if your spouse isn’t a U.S. citizen, then all bets are off. t Lee Carpenter is an associate attorney at the law rm Semmes, Bowen & Semmes and can be reached at 410-576-4729 or lcarpenter@semmes.com. Learn more about LGBT estate planning at Mdlgbtestateplanning.com. This column offers general legal info, not speci c legal advice.
Join the Human Race
against HIV/AIDS The NIAID Vaccine Research Center is looking for HIV-positive volunteers 18 to 70 years old to participate in clinical research. Studies will evaluate investigational products that target HIV. Financial compensation will be provided. To volunteer, call 1-866-833-LIFE (toll-free) or TTY 1-866-411-1010, email vaccines@nih.gov, or visit www.vrc.nih.gov.
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QUALITY OF LIFE // HEALTH
Open Wide ask Dr Eva
Dr Eva Hersh
Some Unusual Headaches Dear Dr. Eva, How can you tell when a headache is dangerous? My partner gets migraines which are sometimes extremely painful. I worry that if he had a stroke or a brain tumor it could be mistaken for just another migraine. Chris Dear Chris, I understand your concern. The best thing you can do to prevent missing a new cause of headache in your partner is to become very familiar with the pattern of his usual headaches. A new type of headache will be in some way different from his usual
headaches. The difference lets you know he needs evaluation. In the last column, I listed some Headache Red Flags, signs that a headache might be dangerous and needs medical evaluation. To briefly recap, these include: • Headache that is more severe or has different characteristics compared to that persons past headaches. • Headache with fever or stiff neck, • Worst headache of my life • Headache preventing sleep or waking a person from sleep. • Headache after a fall or head injury. Many people believe that headache is a common sign of stroke, but this is not true. Typical signs of stroke include sudden onset of weakness or numbness on one side of the face or body, difficulty walking or speaking, confusion, or vision change. Brain tumors have similar symptoms, but usually with a gradual onset, over weeks to months.
aches for the first couple of days. We get along fine, I’m not aware of any stress. I live in Delaware, and it takes a six-hour flight to get to Denver where she lives. I don’t usually get headaches. Can you explain this? Is it due to the long flight? L.B.
Useful to read about, nasty to have!
Dear Dr. Eva, Every time I visit my sister I get head-
Dear L. B., It is probably due to the high altitude, not to the flight. People who are susceptible to altitude sickness develop headache and fatigue after traveling to higher altitudes. The headache usually responds to over-thecounter pain medicines and goes away within a few days. The fatigue may take longer to go away. Drinking extra fluids can be helpful. Your best plan is to make your visits longer so you can have more days feeling well to enjoy beautiful Colorado. If you plan to go to the mountains, an even higher altitude, wait until the last days of your visit. Dear Dr. Eva, My friend recently suffered a brain aneurysm which left her disabled as if she’d had a stroke. Could you explain what an aneurysm is? Can it be prevented? Can it be diagnosed before so much damage is done? Concerned Dear Concerned, Cerebral aneurysm is a weak spot in one of the arteries that carry blood through the brain. Aneurysms are usually inborn, and can run in families. They are sometimes diagnosed by accident when a brain CT or MRI is done to diagnose headache or other problems. Aneurysms can be surgically repaired with no brain damage if they are found before they begin to leak. When aneurysms begin to leak, they may either break suddenly or leak slowly. If the aneurysm breaks, blood escapes into the brain and there is some amount of permanent brain damage. The extent of damage depends on how soon the problem is diagnosed and surgery is done. If the leak begins slowly, small amounts of blood are released into the spinal fluid. This causes irritation which is felt as a severe headache with stiff neck. At this point, the di-
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agnosis may be made by doing a lumbar puncture (spinal tap), which will show the red blood cells. Whenever it is diagnosed, the only treatment for aneurysm is surgery. Dear Dr. Eva, I recently had a weird experience that I am embarrassed to bring up with my doctor. I’m hoping you can shed some light on it. I don’t want to go into details, but it was a sexual situation. Just right at the point of orgasm, I got a very sudden, severe, blinding headache. If I had medical insurance I would have gone to the emergency room. I just lay down with my eyes closed since the pain was worse with light. The pain gradually went away over several hours. It hasn’t happened again, but I am very nervous about sex. What was this? Is it likely to happen again? Nervous Dear Nervous, What you had was a well-known phenomenon known as coital migraine. It is frightening but never dangerous. It can happen even to people who don’t otherwise have migraines. These headaches can recur but also frequently happen as a one-time event. This can cause fear of orgasm, as you are experiencing. It may be helpful to take over-the count painkillers to help prevent, or at least decrease, the headache. t Eva Hersh is a Baltimore family physician. Please send questions and comments to her by email at dr.eva@baltimoreoutloud.com
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LIVELY ARTS // QMUSIC
Country ’tis of Thee BY GREGG SHAPIRO Known far and wide for putting her money where her mouth is, versatile and enduring Tony Award-winning diva Cyndi Lauper is one of the most outspoken supporters of the LGBT community. Before we became aware of that, it was her singing voice and distinctive fashion sense that initially caught our eye. After forays into pop, dance music, standards and the blues, Lauper, who had us going gaga long before Lady Gaga, lends her remarkable vocal range to a set of country numbers on Detour (Sire). Joined by a stellar array of country legends, including Willie Nelson and Emmylou Harris, Lauper leaves her “unusual” mark on a series of mid-20th century country classics, including Wanda Jackson’s “Funnel of Love,” and Patsy Cline’s “Walking after Midnight” and “I Fall to Pieces.” To her credit, Lauper knows when to utilize country’s trademark catch in the throat (something that has served her well over the years) on heartbreakers such as “Misty Blue,” “The End of the World,” and “Begging To You.” Duets with a yodeling Jewel (“I Want to be a Cowboy’s Sweetheart”) and Alison Krauss (“Hard Candy Christmas”) are also standouts. Has Bob Dylan run out of his own things
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to say? Fallen Angels (Columbia), Dylan’s second album of covers of songs associated with Frank Sinatra, steps up the torchy twang of its 2015 predecessor. Like Willie Nelson did on his masterpiece Stardust, Dylan uncovers the country possibilities of standards by Harold Arlen and Johnny Mercer (“Come Rain or Come Shine” and “That Old Black Magic”), Mercer and Hoagy Carmichael (“Skylark”), Jimmy Van Heusen and Sammy Cahn (“All The Way”), Van Heusen and Johnny Burke (“Polka Dots and Moonbeams”), Isham Jones and Gus Kahn (“It Had to be You”), and others. Of course, depending on how you feel about Dylan as an interpreter of other people’s songs (read: singer), Fallen Angels could be heaven or hell. Speaking of covers, Sturgill Simpson s
OCTOBER 14, 2016 • BALTIMOREOUTLOUD.COM
breathtaking rendition of Nirvana’s “In Bloom” is just one of many reasons to get his fantastic third album A Sailor’s Guide to Earth (Atlantic). A concept album (a musical letter to his newborn son), the nine songs are delivered in a stunning retro style that incorporates soul, as he does on the magni cent opener “Welcome To Earth (Pollywog)” and “Keep it Between the Lines,” alongside the Southern comfort. Prepare to be swept away by the gorgeous “Breakers Road” and “Oh Sarah,” and shaken up by “Brace for Impact (Live A Little)” and “Call To Arms.” In the early days of his stand-up comedy career, Steve Martin’s material could best be described as unconventional. But the banjo he played in his shows hinted at a more traditional side to his talents. Throughout the 21st century, Martin has recorded and released well-received bluegrass albums, including a pair of collaborations with Edie Brickell, and even earned Grammy Awards for his music. Martin and Brickell have taken their collaboration to a new level with the Tony Award-nominated musical Bright Star. Based on a story by Martin and Brickell, Bright Star: Original Broadway Cast Recording (Ghostlight), with music and book by Martin and music and lyrics by Brickell, the play takes place in the early 1920s and mid-1940s, and involves literary ambition, babies born out of wedlock, and more, all presented in a vintage country music setting. Stephanie Rice, Colonial Blue’s out lead vocalist has a solid grasp of the concept of from a whisper to a scream on songs such as “Break You Bones,” “My Treason,” “Home” and “Take A Glass,” from the band’s debut album Dear Misery, (Colonialblueband.com). As the daughter of a preacher in a small town, Rice has an increasingly familiar coming out story involving being tossed out of the house (how “Christian” of them!) and fending for herself. Music was Rice’s refuge and the ten songs, including standouts “Cold Water” and “Oh No,” on Dear Misery, prove that that was a good thing. If you ever wondered what Louisiana glam rock might sound like then you ought to take a listen to Dolls of Highland (Sub Pop), the irresistible debut album by Kyle Craft. If you can imagine Randy Newman channeling David Johansen via Van Dyke Parks then, in addition to having a vivid imagination, you have some idea what to expect. This concept is best illustrated
on fantastic songs such as “Eye of a Hurricane,” “Berlin,” “Lady of the Ark,” “Gloom Girl,” “Future Midcity Massacre,” “Jane Beat The Reaper,” and “Three Candles.” Country music is lled with legacy artists continuing on the paths laid by their forebears. Amy Helm, daughter of The Band’s Levon Helm, and Trixie Whitley, daughter of Chris Whitley, are two of latest (and best) examples of what can come from good genes. Helm, who has sung with her late father, as well as “helmed” her own band Ollabelle, makes her solo debut with the stormy and sensational Didn’t It Rain (E One). With a voice that is sure to appeal to fans of Shelby Lynne, Helm performs a pair of remarkable covers – “Gentling Me” (co-written by lesbian singer/songwriter Mary Gauthier and Beth Nielsen Chapman) and Sam Cooke’s “Good News,” as well as memorable originals including “Rescue Me,” “Sky’s Falling,” and “Sing to Me.” Trixie Whitley does her late father proud on Porta Bohemica (Unday) on which she shares his musical tastes (“Witness,” “Closer,” “Faint Mystery”), while also channeling Annie Lennox (the astonishing “Eliza’s Smile” and “Soft Spoken Words”). “Spirits In My Head” by The Strumbellas, from the Canadian band’s album Hope (Glassnote / Factor) is the most inescapable song of the spring of 2016 and will probably continue to be so well into the summer. In the tradition of The Lumineers, Trampled By Turtles and Mumford & Sons, The Strumbellas follow a folky path. Hope is a tting name for disc as most of the eleven tracks communicate an upbeat mood as can be heard on “Dog,” “Young & Wild,” “The Night Will Save Us,” and “Wild Sun.” However, the reference to things in one’s head (on at least four songs) grows tiring. Speaking of The Lumineers, the trio returns with Cleopatra (Dualtone), its second full-length disc. Four years can be a long time between albums, but to be fair, The Lumineers’ eponymous debut took a little while to catch on. Once it did, however, the band became popular; maybe too popular, because the luminescence has been dimmed in favor of a more serious set of tunes. There is the barest of hint of the trademark stomp/clap (on “Ophelia”) that established The Lumineers. Also, the piano-only closer “Patience” is quite lovely. With an emphasis on the bizarre, on Strange Country (New West) by Kacy & Clayton, you can hear in uences ranging from Crosby, Stills & Nash to Joni Mitchell and Sandy Denny. Pay close attention to the lyrics to title tune, “If You Ask Me How I’m Keeping,” “Brunswick Stew,” and “Dyin’ Bed Maker,” for examples of just how strange the country can get. That should be considered a recommendation. t Kyle Craft performs November 9th in Philadelphia at Union Transfer.
LIVELY ARTS // OUT ON STAGE
Actor Brice Guerriere Brings Oiled Adonis to Iron Crow’s ‘Rocky Horror Show’
playing around with the idea to create something like a monster. BY FRANKIE KUJAWA I want to try and bring some sort On the heels of the critically of humanity to him even though acclaimed The Wild Party, the he’s created out of something Iron Crow Theatre is bringing else.” a “Science Fiction / Double Guerriere also discussed Feature” to the stage as The that it can be difficult to play a Rocky Horror Show causes character, such as Rocky, who audiences to shiver in antici has less dialogue than some of ... pation. Running at the Motor House (120 West North Avenue, Bal- the other characters. “I have found that timore) from Thursday, October 27th – to shows with less dialogue involves more Monday, October 31st, the cult classic listening. I try to focus to have that expresfollows the story of sweethearts Brad and sive connection. It’s important to have that Janet who encounter the wildly seductive on stage. In the moment, I try to create a world of Dr. Frank-N-Furter. Along the way sense that [Rocky] is there and can underthey find a creepy butler, a devious maid stand things, but he can’t be emotive. He’s and the delightfully m u s c u l a r almost like a child. That’s what I may be bringing into this. Someone who excreation, Rocky. periencing their first few Baltimore OUThours in the world. It’s loud chatted with acoverwhelming and excittor Brice Guerriere, ing, but frustrating since who will play the you are not able to comoiled Adonis Rocky municate with the people later this month. around you.” Guerriere recentThe physical fitness ly joined the Iron demand is also something Crow for The Wild Guerriere is working hard Party. “This was to meet. “I’ve been working my first production with a trainer the last few with Iron Crow.” months and he has a plan.” Guerriere, who reGuerriere laughed, “He’s located from Burbeen calling it the ‘Rocky lington, Vermont, Workout.’ I’ve been working in February, out about six days a week at the explained, “I’m gym. After I sing my song in the relatively new show there’s not much in the way to the area and of expressing myself other than was looking for Brice just being there.” Guerriere adds, some new opGuerriere “It’s been good, though, and has portunities. It’s made me more body conscious to a very professional theater watch what I eat. It’s been a lot of and they are re-starting and re-booting and taking on this new phase. The cast work and a lot of my personal time, but it’s a and team behind everything is great. It’s good thing to try and be healthier and chala very collaborative and community effort.” lenge yourself to get to the that point.” Guerriere also added that he’s prepared Guerriere, who is also a graduate of University of Vermont’s theatre program, to bare his heart, soul, and body on stage. gave his take on the character of Rocky. “I’ve done theater in the past where I’ve been “Rocky is a really interesting character. naked on stage before. In my opinion, it’s just We just had rehearsals today, actually, another way of showing ourselves. It’s similar and worked on my song. It’s a big song to performing a big song and being vulnerawhen he’s first introduced. From there, my ble. If I’m going to be crying on stage or fully character’s job is to really drive the plot shirtless in front of audiences; it’s basically forward.” Guerriere laughed. “He’s also like two parts of the same story.” t For more info visit Ironcrowtheatre.org. something for people to look at. I’ve been
An ever more muscular delight
Disney on Ice Sparkles BY FRANKIE KUJAWA Some of Walt Disney’s most beloved characters will skate into Baltimore this month, as “Disney on Ice: Follow Your Heart” captivates at the Royal Farms Arena from October 27th to 30th. Baltimore OUTloud recently sat down with skater and performer Tommy Do. “I play the role of Captain Shang from Mulan.” Do explained. “It’s super, super fun! I love skating and I love skating with the character of Mulan. It’s part of the ‘Disney Prince and Princess’ section of the show. They dance to a number to celebrate the Tommy Chinese New Year.” Do Do, a native of Boston, has been working with Disney on Ice since 2007. “Travelling from town to town each week can sometimes be a little tiring, but it’s still super fun. I feel lucky that I can travel for work. We try to make each city our own. Some of us
bring different things on tour with us. Some of us bring a blanket from home. I enjoy the fact that I can travel the world and see and do what I love each day.” Do also added that he enjoys performing in front of people. “The audience reaction is my favorite part about performing. It de nitely makes the job easier when there are thousands of people watching your every move.” Do continued on to discuss that, though he enjoys his role, there still is one role that is just beyond his grasp. “I don’t think I’ll ever be able to play her, but I’d love to play Elsa.” Do added, “I’ve auditioned for it, and something about it, I just can’t let it go. It’s one of my all-time favorite characters. In my show, she has an amazing solo with a lot of effects. There’s an ice palace that comes down and a snowflake falls from the top of the ceiling. It’s such a dynamic number. The kids really love it!” t
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LIVELY ARTS // OUT ON SCREEN
Misses the Mark BY CHUCK DUNCAN It’s difficult to review a film that comes with as much baggage as The Birth of a Nation does, but we are here to discuss the merits of the film and not the character of the star, writer and director Nate Parker. You can find plenty of discussion about his past elsewhere and decide for yourself where he fits on a scale from Roman Polanski to Woody Allen. Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s focus on the film which tells the historical story of Nat Turner, a child born into slavery in the Deep South who grew into a man who had convinced himself – if not others – that he was a prophet of the Lord. As a child, Nat was allowed to play with the child of the plantation owner but he was not allowed inside the house. When the mistress of the house (Penelope Ann Miller) learned Nat had the gift of
the slaves in the general vicinity to kill their masters and march to the fort in Jerusalem, Virginia, where they could steal weapons and really make their cause known. But things don’t always work out as planned. Nate Parker has assembled a very talented cast to assay roles that unfortunately become a bit stereotypical, from the slave hunters to the house slaves. Parker himself does a fine job as Turner, but the film itself is problematic, least of all because people will see this film as an accurate account of Nat Turner’s Uprising as it came to be known. Unfortunately, it does more to mythologize and romanticize Turner and avoids many of the harsh realities of what happened during and after the uprising. In one scene, after the plantation owners have been murdered, one of the slaves is seen helping take a child away. It comes off as a tender moment of mercy, but in reality no one was spared, not even the children. The film is full of clichéd shots seen in films about the pre-Civil War South since Gone With the Wind: trees full of Spanish moss, beautiful grand plantation homes, sweeping vistas of cotton fields. Everything looks beautiful but this is all a facade to make the film feel more “important” than it really is. The final shot even tries to tie the uprising to the Civil War, but it seems unlikely that it had that much impact as the two events were about 30 years apart. And historically, the revolt led to the murders of hundreds of slaves and free blacks by the whites who were terrified of another uprising happening. But you don’t get any of this from the film which really just leaves you wondering at the end why many regard Turner as a hero when it seems he accomplished nothing, leaving the viewer oddly unemotional at his fate by the time the credits roll. Some may be moved, some may certainly feel a twinge of “white guilt,” but outside of the cast, the music and the gorgeous cinematography, by the end of the movie you may ask yourself what was the point? t
The Birth of a Nation strives to be important
Viva la Revolucion!
reading, she took the child into her home to teach him, mainly schooling him on the Bible. As Nat (Nate Parker) matured, he felt a calling to the Lord and held church services for the other slaves on Sundays, and slaves from neighboring plantations also attended. Learning of this gift, the local minister set up a business deal with Nat’s owner, Samuel Turner (Armie Hammer), to bring Nat to various plantations in the area to preach the Gospel ... and teach the slaves how they should behave, in essence using the word of God (which actually instructs slave owners how to beat their slaves!) to control a potentially unruly group of people. While Nat and Thomas had a somewhat cordial relationship, several events caused Nat to rebel, eventually organizing
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// SCREEN SAVOR
Beauty and Anger BY GREGG SHAPIRO Even before you sit down to watch the 40th anniversary collector’s edition double-disc Blu-ray of Carrie (MGM/Shout Factory), for the first or the 50th time, it’s important to remember a few things. Carrie was the first (and possibly best) adaptation of a Stephen King novel. It’s the Brian De Palma film that set the stage for films by the director that followed such as “The Fury,” “Dressed To Kill,” and “Blow Out.” Carrie was ultimately a women’s picture and featured Oscar-nominated performances by Sissy Spacek and Piper Laurie (she was robbed!), Betty Buckley’s film debut, and included nasty character such as Chris (Nancy Allen) and Norma (P.J. Soles), who would define the “mean girls” title. Additionally, Carrie starred period heartthrob hunks John Travolta and William Katt, causing much swooning among teenage girls and gay boys alike. Pino Donaggio’s terrifying score perfectly set the tone, especially for the Hitchcockian finale that still makes people leap out of their seats. Carrie also inspired a sequel (1999’s Rage: Carrie 2), two remakes (2002 TV, 2013 theatrical), as well as flop stage musical and a campy musical parody, although none of them came close to capturing the terror and magic of the original. Telekinetic loner Carrie (Spacek) lives with her fanatically Christian mother Margaret (Laurie) in a crumbling house over-decorated with religious “art.” Bullied at home and at school, Carrie becomes increasingly aware of her ability to move things with her mind. After an unfortunate scene in the girls’ locker room she becomes even more of a pariah. However, her social status takes a sudden turn when popular girl Sue (Amy Irving) asks her equally popular jock boyfriend Tommy (Katt) to take Carrie to the prom in an effort to make things right for the beaten-down girl. Chris (Allen) and her crew, including bonehead boyfriend Billy (Travolta), devise a plan to make the prom, from which Chris has been excluded for bad behavior,
an unforgettable one. As Carrie begins to transform from greasy-haired outcast to budding beauty, with the aid of gym teacher Miss Collins (Buckley), Margaret is beside herself. Knowing firsthand the evil men do, Margaret attempts to dissuade Carrie from attending the prom and potentially making a fool of herself. As it turns out, mother knew best, and the prom turns into a bloodbath. But Carrie can take care of herself and does so in a display of gruesome violence, saving the best for mommy dearest. Blu-ray bonus features include a second disc of new cast and crew interviews and several featurettes. Directed by Mary Dore, the doc She’s Beautiful When She’s Angry (Music Box Films), explores life before, during and after the feminist movement. In the pre-internet days of mimeograph and stamps, the women’s movement arose, emerging from the anti-war, college and civil rights movements. These social change movements gave rise to women’s consciousness, leading to the beginning of a necessary revolution. Following the impact of the movement on issues including equal pay, discrimination, consciousness raising, abortion, communities of color, lesbians, women’s health, rape and self-defense, sexuality and orgasm, and integrating race, class and gender, the doc is a visual historical document. In this election year, it also serves as a reminder that no victories are permanent. However, in many instances anger can lead to action and profound change can be made through organizing. Proof positive that “the personal is political,” She s Beautiful When She s Angry features interviews with NOW’s Muriel Fox, writer/activists Alix Kates Shulman, Susan Brownmiller, Kate Millett, out lesbians Karla Jay and Rita Mae Brown, ABC correspondent Marlene Sanders, politician Eleanor Htttolmes Norton, and many other important women’s voices from the movement. The DVD includes more than an hour of bonus material. t
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OUT & ABOUT // DAVID’S THOUGHTS
Portland | Northwest Cool BY DAVID PLACHER Smiles at Visiting Portland The Roxy (we’re talking Oregon, not Maine) for an extended weekend getaway is both exciting and exhausting. The exciting part is that you get to experience what’s almost a new culture, meet new people, and taste new food: the exhausting part is that there’s so much to do and you’ve landed in a time zone that three hours behind. Oregon is a state full of luscious green hills and mountains and beautiful clear rivers. Lots of young people with the hipster look – color layers of mismatch vintage clothes, over-sized plastic frame glasses, skinny jeans, and casual style hair. Oregon is also one of ve states that do not levy a sales tax (along with Alaska, Delaware, Montana, and New Hampshire). The adventure of traveling to and from Oregon learning about the state’s gay history, its unique state constitution, its many tourist attractions as well as its eye-opening social problem, make this trip a learning experience of a lifetime. There’s no direct ight from Baltimore to Portland or vice versa. I traveled on Southwest (a great airline) with a layover in Kansas City and returned to Baltimore on Spirit Airlines (not so great) with a Las Vegas
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layover. When I booked my ticket for Spirit using Priceline, a third party service provider, I did not see the extra cost for a carry on and I did not notice the extra step of having to go to Spirit’s website to pay for one. Spirit increased the price of my ticket $60 at the airport as a result – not happy. Oregon’s gay history is rich. In 1806, Lewis and Clark were directed by local Indians to a place where “two young men” live together. In 1843, Oregon Pioneers adopted the code of Iowa simply because someone had a copy present, and the Iowa Code did not outlaw sodomy. In 1850, a new code was adopted by the Oregon Territorial legislature and it also did not outlaw sodomy. It wasn’t until 1853 that Oregon outlawed sodomy and until 1886 that someone was convicted under that law. In 1977, Portland Mount Mayor Neil GoldHood schmidt issued a proclamation for Gay Pride. In 2006, Virginia Linder was elected to the Oregon State Supreme Court and she is the rst gay member of a state supreme court. In 2008, Sam Adams was elected mayor of Portland – the rst gay mayor of a major U.S. city. Oregon also has a unique relationship with its
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strip bars. Under the Oregon Constitution, Article I, section 8, states, “No law shall be passed restraining the free expression of opinions, or restricting the right to speak, write, or print freely on any subject whatever; but every person shall be responsible for the abuse of this right.” The Oregon Supreme Court has vigorously defended the “free expression” including stripping, resulting in an explosion of strip clubs throughout Oregon –including gay strip clubs – because they are dif cult to regulate at both the local and state levels of government. Out of all the major cities in the U.S., Portland has the highest number of strip clubs per capita and the same holds true on the state level. Some of the gay clubs where you will nd dancers include Silverado, (Silveradopdx.com), Stag Pdx (Stagpdx.com), and CC Slaughters. There’s plenty to do in Portland. There is the Portland Aerial Tram that takes you to the OHSU Center for Health and Healing – at rst
Scandals
Willamette River
(Scandalspdx.com), a small gay bar. With all the fun things to do in Portland, one major drawback is its high homeless population – i.e. homelessness itself is not unusually for a city, but the high number of homeless people for the size of Portland appears unusually. The racial and age demographics are white and young, as opposed to the cities in the northeast that have homeless populations that mostly consist of older minorities. The light rail ride from the airport to downtown Portland takes you past tent cities along the expressway and past people living on the side of old abandoned buildings. On the Riverwalk beside the Willamette River, homeless people are standing around and it’s not uncommon to be asked for money. On a few of the street corners, homeless people just wonder. A few of the people seem like living zombies, trapped in mindlessness, just slowly roaming – signs that point to potential drug use. Oregon is a great state to visit, especially if you need to escape to the West coast for a few days. Portland is walkable and it has great public transportation. The cost is reasonable and the people are friendly. It is not uncommon to see the local bars have business at 3 p.m. – including weekdays and even on a Monday. So pack your bags and head to Portland! t
read, an odd place for a tourist attraction, but it is not – which is on the top of a mountain where you can see the city and Mount St. Helens and Mount Silverado Hood. You can walk along the Willamette River and visit the Maritime Museum, Japanese Historical Plaza, and the Tom McCall Waterfront Park. One of the best places to eat is Tasty ’n’ Alder (Tastynalder.com), but the wait (it’s worth it) can be around two hours, so bring your walking shoes because you will have lots of time to kill while you wait. If you’re out late at night, The Roxy (Theroxydiner.com) is a great place to sober up – in fact, it’s next door to Scandals
OUT IN THE VALLEY
2nd Annual Evening of Mystery Masquerade Ball Hagerstown Hopes will be hosting their second annual Evening of Mystery Masquerade Ball, October 22nd from 6 to10 p.m. at AVA Lounge (28 South Potomac Street, Hagerstown). Indulge in an evening filled with murder, mystery, entertainment, prizes, and fun. Your hostess for the evening, Ashley Bannks, will ensure you have a marvelous time. Start the evening off with an adult
beverage, but be careful, it may be the last you drink. As the evening progresses, put your sleuthing skills to the test as you are submerged directly into a whodunit. Enjoy the mesmorizing movements of Lady Sophia as she performs her spotlight number. Be sure to bring your check books (or Amex Black Cards) as Ashley auctions off three bachelors and three bachelorettes. To conclude the evening, you may enter to win the best male and female costume contest and we will do the 50/50 raffle drawing. t
space that promotes healing by addressing issues of safety, the emotional impact, moving through experiences and supporting resiliency. Interested applicants for this free weekly support group should contact Heartly House at 301-662-8800. The time, day, and location of the group will be disclosed to applicants after they complete a successful phone intake process. Heartly House is the only organization in Frederick County, Maryland, that provides comprehensive services to those who have experienced domestic violence, sexual assault, and child abuse. They have been providing these services since 1979. Services include: a 24hour hotline, emergency shelter, individual and group counseling, victim advocate services and legal representation, medical advocacy, abuse intervention groups, and community outreach and professional education. While all services are confidential, please be advised that they are mandated by law to report child abuse, as well as threats of suicide or homicide. For more info, contact Heartlyhouse.org or 301-6688800. t
Frederick County Support Group for Sexual Assault Safe Space Healing is an open and ongoing free weekly support group specifically for adult LGBTQ people who have experiences sexual assault or abuse. It is facilitated by licensed therapists from Heartly House. The support group provides a safe BALTIMORE OUTLOUD OCTOBER 14, 2016 • BALTIMOREOUTLOUD.COM t
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OUT IN THE VALLEY // OUT OF THE BOX
An Interview with Mayor David Gysberts BY E.A. PERPER David Gysberts is a high-school guidance counselor. He’s gay. He loves the outdoors. He lives in a beautiful historic house. And he’s the mayor of Hagerstown, Maryland. “My identity, like everybody else’s, has many layers. I think of myself rst as a child of God or the universe; a member of my family; a citizen of my country, my state, my county, my city; my profession; things that I do for hobbies – so being gay is not the most salient part of my identity,” he explained. But: “There were signs. Like, my mom should’ve known when I loved to sit down with her and watch “The Golden Girls.” That was probably a sign,” he joked. “I always knew, ever since I was little, that I was not the same as everybody else,” he said. “I always rejected labels, and I hated being put in a box.” He insists bullying didn’t have a long-term effect on his psyche, but he did recall one speci c incident: “I remember moving to Hagerstown from Middletown when I was in seventh grade, and this kid – I won’t say his name – I remember, speci cally, the moment where he called me a fag, and I’m thinking, ‘How does he know?’ said Gysberts. “I don’t even think he was commenting on my preference or my orientation. He was just being a bully. But I remember thinking, ‘What am I doing to let people know that I am [gay]? Seriously, how does he know?’” Although Gysberts didn’t come out explicitly to his family until he was 26 years old, he didn’t fear their reaction; he describes them as “very supportive and caring.” “I took my time to gure myself out. Again, I tend to reject labels, but I was never secret about anything, because I knew, being an educator and especially being a counselor, forcing people to live a double life or to live some kind of lie is just unhealthy,” he said. His teachers were largely kind and understanding, and Gysberts credits them with his interest in becoming an educator. Nevertheless, by the time senior year rolled around, Gysberts was eager to leave home. He earned a scholarship to High Point University, a conservative, United Methodist-af liated school in High Point, North Carolina. At High Point, he overheard two girls talking about how the university had forbidden them from of cially organizing a gay-straight alliance. “My little antennas of justice popped up, and I said, ‘Excuse me, I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation. Tell me more about this, and I want to get involved.’ Long story short, I got
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involved in this group,” Gysberts said. “There was an alum who donated a certain amount of money and earmarked it speci cally for this kind of group. The board of trustees would not allow this group to be formed.” During this time, Gysberts didn’t identify as gay. His queer friends pressed him about his sexuality, but Gysberts said he didn’t feel the need to label himself in order to participate in the organization. Gysberts and another student were appointed spokespeople of their nascent gaystraight alliance and took it upon themselves to meet with every single member of the board of trustees to plead their case. Because of his experience working at a United Methodist-afliated summer camp in southern Washington County, Gysberts was familiar with the church’s of cial policies and doctrine. Unfortunately, he soon discovered the trustees’ personal biases – not their faith – were motivating their decision to stand against the GSA. “I had this very come-to-Jesus moment, I guess you could say, where I had to really decide, do I want to put my time and energy and money into an institution that really doesn’t value me?” he said. “I didn’t have this conversation with anyone else, because I Hagerstown wasn’t ready to say that Mayor David I was going to identi- Gysberts ty as LGBT. So I did. I transferred.” He ended up at Salisbury University, where he thrived. “It’s funny – they had a gay-straight alliance at Salisbury at the time, and I never joined it,” Gysberts said. “It was the principle. I’ve always had this inclination towards ghting the man and justice for all – really, those American principles.” He loved history but majored in liberal studies, an intersectional degree combining philosophy, sociology and education. His independent study – which he describes as “adventure-based ropes course activities to teach con ict resolution skills” – foreshadowed his later participation on the board of directors of the Washington County Community Mediation Center. After graduation, Gysberts substitutetaught and then became the paraprofessional who oversaw the students assigned in-school
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suspension. “I really enjoyed listening to their crazy stories and trying to help them keep things in perspective,” he said. His mother, a teacher, showed him an advertisement for a weekend Master of Arts program in counseling at West Virginia University. Over the next two-and-a-half years, Gysberts earned his graduate degree. Now, he’s in his tenth year as a guidance counselor at Poolesville High School in Poolesville, Maryland. What do I need to get on the ballot? After Gysberts bought a home in Hagerstown in 2005, he got involved in civic life almost immediately. Planning and zoning intrigued him the most. “I was always interested in where the sidewalk ends,” he said. “Why does it end there when we know there’s people beyond it?” Gysberts was appointed to the Hagerstown Planning Commission in March 2007. In early January 2009, Gysberts left a Planning Commission meeting and paid the election board a visit (Hagerstown City Council elections weren’t held in tandem with the presidential elections until 2012). He discovered no one was running for mayor against the incumbent, Bob Bruchey. “This is America! We need some competition! At least give people a choice,” said Gysberts. Twenty- ve dollars, some paperwork and a treasurer appointment (his sister) later, Gysberts was on the ballot, right before the 9 p.m. deadline that night. He had precious little time to campaign – the general election was held in May 2009, Gysberts, a relative unknown, receivetd 39.77 percent of the vote. He didn’t necessarily plan to run again. But January 2012 rolled around, and Gysberts did the same thing – signed up to campaign right under the wire. But something was different: in 2012, the general election would be in November, not May. He had more time to prepare and campaign. He received 58.66 percent of the votes that November. David Gysberts was the new mayor of Hagerstown. Hometown pride Live-streamed council meetings. Five new parks opened in four years. Consensus-build-
ing. Holding a summit on housing. Strengthening neighborhoods. Enhancing the arts district – these are just a few of the accomplishments Gysberts is most proud of. “I don’t care who gets the credit. I just want to get things done. I want to feel like we’re doing something and making progress. It’s not about me. People say, ‘What’s your vision?’ I get that question all the time: ‘What’s your vision for Hagerstown?’ It’s not about my vision,” he said. “I can tell you what my vision is, but if I can’t get everybody else to come along with me? There has to be a shared vision. That’s what I’ve always tried to emphasize. I think we’ve done a lot with that leadership style.” Since my interview with Mayor Gysberts in early September, Hagerstown police have come under scrutiny: a white police of cer used pepper spray while arresting a biracial 15-yearold girl and did not immediately take her to the hospital for injuries sustained during her arrest. I reached out to Gysberts for comment but received no reply. Gysberts is aware that, as mayor, he is a role model. Never was this more evident than in the wake of a high-school anti-bullying assembly, during which Gysberts said publicly that he was gay. The Associated Press ended up interviewing one of the attendees, a trans student, who said Gysberts’ openness resonated with her. When I asked Gysberts about the assembly and its aftermath, he admits he was taken aback by the positive reaction. “It wasn’t like, ‘Oh, my God. I just made this statement in front of a bunch of kids.’ But it made me think, ‘Wow. That’s the power of just being honest.’ Just being who I am and doing what I do and what I think is right, trying to be the best person possible,” he said. “But I never thought that some passing statement that was just honest would make somebody feel better about themselves or be some kind of epiphany for them. That’s just amazing to me.” He added, “I think the other thing, too, is there are a lot of gay people in Hagerstown and Washington County, and maybe they’re not out there waving the rainbow ag in every parade. I think they’re out in their families, and they’re loved and accepted in their families.” Their quiet presence, Gysberts posited, contributes to “less negative attitudes towards gay people than you might expect.” Hagerstown Hopes presented its fth annual Hagerstown Pride in July. It went over well with the community – an interfaith religious service, drag performances, a good crowd, and no threats or counter-demonstrations to be seen. “People [who] say, ‘You’re pushing the gay agenda!’ Oh, I’m sorry – what is that? Freedom? Equality? Justice? Is that what we’re talking about when we talk about the gay agenda? It’s like Hillary [Clinton] said: ‘Deal me in.’ It’s recognizing the community is there already, and that no one should be ashamed: You should have pride.” t
OUT IN THE VALLEY
Parenting OUTloud
Rev. Kelly Crenshaw
Choosing Chores One of my friends finds it very difficult to ask her children to do chores. “They’re only little for a short time,” she says. “They’ll have to learn to work soon enough,” she argues. She wants her children to enjoy every single day of their lives, never having to have responsibilities or worries. She wants school to be their only focus. She wants them to have fun. I see things a little differently. Of course, I want my children to have fun. I want them to enjoy their days. I don’t want them to worry about anything. And – and this is what is most important – I want them to grow up to be responsible adults who understand what it means to be a responsible adult. I believe that we only get a short period of time to help our children learn the lessons they will need as grown-ups. Our job, as parents, is to help our children grow and learn. It won’t be long before they leave our homes and strike out on their own. The more they know, the more likely Happy they will be to succeed. worker One of the best ways I’ve found to teach responsibility is through the use of chores. Even the youngest in the family can help with daily chores. Toddlers can help pick up toys or clear the dinner table. School-aged children can make their own beds and pack their own lunches for school. Sorting laundry helps little ones learn colors. Being responsible for their own laundry can help them develop pride in ownership. Helping with cooking skills can result in developing a child’s creativity. One of our sons is now an adult, working as a baker. He is proud to say that he learned the skills from our home where he often baked bread with me. Recently, I went to visit him at his workplace. He was proud to show me the bakery and where he does his work. He discussed some unique
grains they use for their breads and was excited to tell his friends about the types of bread we made when he was growing up. He was quick to say that he doesn’t think he would ever have found work that he enjoyed nearly this much if it hadn’t been for our family’s love of baking. I’m not trying to imply that your kids are going to fall in love with vacuuming the rugs or scrubbing the toilet. What I am trying to say is that you never know what a kid will learn from something as simple as routine chores. A child who takes pride in a clean room, for example, may grow up to practice any number of professions, where pride is important. Maybe he’ll develop a love for interior design or be detail oriented as a cosmetic surgeon. Maybe keeping track of her allowance will help her develop the math skills she will need as a stock broker or teacher. If nothing else, children can learn to appreciate the success of a job well done. And that is a lesson we all need to learn at some point in our lives. So, parents, do not hesitate to assign regular chores to your children. Keep in mind their ages and abilities. Don’t be afraid to let them do it to their own standards and not necessarily your own. That bed may not be perfectly made, but it will be made. Encourage your children to show you how well they can do things, when they are trusted to do them. Most of all, know that your children are learning things they can’t learn from anyone else. They are learning how to grow up to be responsible, caring human beings. And, our world needs many more of those. t Rev. Kelly Crenshaw is the mom of 16 adopted kids, two biological kids, guardian of one baby girl and foster mom of dozens. Some are lesbian, some gay, some straight, and some bisexual. Kelly founded a K-12 day school where kids could have a safe, bully-free environment for learning. She is co-owner of a counselling agency that works with children and their families. Send your parenting questions to her at pastor.kelly@comcast.net
Brian’s
Brain
Brian George Hose
Facing Fear I don’t know how long we were in the darkness. We’d come to the haunted house, billed as the scariest in the world, in search of a good time. The brochure made it sound like Scooby Doo for adults, a fun way to pass some time in Niagara Falls, Ontario, a city seemingly built of tourist traps. It was the off season and, as the only customers, we were told we would have the place all to ourselves. The brochure hadn’t warned us that we would be making our way through the labyrinthine house in complete darkness. It quickly became clear that this wasn’t an episode of Scooby Doo. Alone in the dark, we Spooky scrambled strong over and under barriers set in our path by the unseen staff of the attraction. My friend and I were suddenly separated by a moving wall, transforming my amusement into panic. On the other side of the wall, I heard breathing. When I felt hands grab me by the shoulders, I dropped (or, more accurately, threw) myself to the ground without a sound, not even a scream. Afterward my friend and I laughed about the experience. We were shaken, almost dazed, and joked about how we’d underestimated the haunted house. We walked through the bitter cold until we found a restaurant where we drowned our fear in French fries that themselves were drowning in gravy. After a few minutes our fear subsided and what had been terrifying was now funny, even invigorating. Most surprising was that I felt great, like I had just checked out of a spa. Fear is funny like that. Fear is meant to keep us safe, to help us avoid dangerous situations. Fear tells us that we should
step away from the edge of a cliff, to avoid shortcuts through dark alleys when we’re alone at night. It’s a feeling that can’t be ignored, a sensation that clouds our thinking and changes our body’s processes. Fear isn’t fun when we know it’s real, so most of us avoid things that scare us. After all, fear keeps us safe. Fear can also be cathartic. In scary situations that we know are safe, like haunted houses and horror movies, fear becomes fun. We embrace the emotion of fear, challenging ourselves to see how much of it we can stand. We keep going, we keep watching. We wonder if the next scare will be the one that’s too big to handle. When it comes, it’s never as scary as we expect it to be. We laugh at ourselves and keep going. This is what I’ve come to love about fear. Facing fear in safe situations proves to us that we are braver, stronger than we thought we were. Even when we don’t enjoy being afraid, these safe situations remind us that there was never any real reason to be afraid in the rst place. The monster only exists in the scary movie; the stranger’s hands grabbing me belong to a polite Canadian man who is just doing his job. When it’s over, we are victorious. We have beaten the fear around us and the fear within ourselves. This is important because we live in a world of fear. We fear change, the unknown, and the world we live in. We have more than enough reasons to be afraid, so we unconsciously hold on to our fear until our muscles ache. When this happens, we need to let go of our fear. When it comes to fear, I believe the best way out is through. We have to accept our fear, face it, then let it go. If we ignore fear, it stays with us; if we feel it, it leaves. Maybe this is why I always feel better after flinching my way through a scary movie. When it’s over, I look back at all the silly things that made me jump and realize there was never anything to be afraid of after all. I go back to my life knowing that if I can stomach a human centipede, I’ll surely be able to get through a Monday morning. t
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OUT IN THE VALLEY // FAITH
// HEALTH
Spirit Speaks What is Church to You? BY REV. KELLY CRENSHAW The people of New Light MCC comes from a variety of backgrounds. We are Baptist, Lutheran, Brethren, Methodist, Catholic, and Pentecostal – among others. We are young, old, and every age in between. We enjoy traditional hymns, contemporary Christian music, and praise choruses. We enjoy formal worship traditions, casual worship styles, and a variety of worship experiences. Basically, we’re a bunch of different people, who come from a lot of different places, who enjoy worship in a myriad of ways. The great thing about a church like New Light is that it rede nes church. Our church embraces some of the traditions we remember from our childhoods. It brings in the traditions of other churches. Most of all, a church like New Light embraces all that is welcoming about church. We enjoy the practice of weekly communion, served in a personal way either individually or in small groups. We sing familiar songs and those you may not have heard before, but quickly learn to enjoy. Many of our members and friends participate in the worship service, reading scripture, giving announcements and leading music. We encourage people to be involved in the service in non-speaking ways, too. To us, church is a group of people, gathered together to share our mutual sense of faith. We come together to praise God and to learn more about God’s will for our lives. We work together to serve the people in our community and beyond. And, above all else, we offer a place where LGBTQ people and their allies can worship together without the fear of rejection or ridicule. For us, church is a safe place of celebration and love. t For more info about New Light contact one of the co-pastors at 301-797-5698 or newlightmcc@hotmail.com.
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OCTOBER 14, 2016 • BALTIMOREOUTLOUD.COM
Health Chat
Debbie Anne
Taming a Killer The number one killer in the world is cholesterol. Heart disease and stroke, both caused by uncontrolled cholesterol, are the number one and number two causes of death in the world. In the U.S. stroke drops to the 5th leading cause of death, but heart disease remains the leading cause of death here for both men and women. For all of you who’ve been led by the pink ribbon to believe that cancer, and more specifically breast cancer is the leading killer of women, you’ve been duped. The U.S. has about 40,000 deaths among women each year from breast cancer, but 290,000 deaths among women from heart disease. So, when you urge your wife, mother, or sister to have her annual mammogram, first urge her to have her cholesterol checked. There are risk factors for heart disease other than cholesterol, but uncontrolled cholesterol is epidemic as is its partner, obesity. Other risk factors include uncontrolled high blood pressure, diabetes, smoking, alcohol abuse, uncontrolled stress, and sedentary lifestyle. As some well-known commercials tell us, cholesterol can also be influenced by genetics too (and age), but the vast majority of risks for heart disease is the foods we put in our bodies that lead to high cholesterol. Out environment is flooded with restaurants; most of us eat out at least once a day, and some of us eat out far more than we eat at home. In the vast majority of restaurants, there is not a single healthy food option available – trust me, I’ve checked. And if you think that ordering a salad is the answer, boy are you kidding yourself. Just go online and see what the nutritional value of your favorite salad really is. One that I used to order all of the time comes in at 1,100 calories, 84 grams of fat, and 2300 mg of salt. It’s as much of a heart attack special as a giant
fast-food burger. The same goes for most prepared or convenience foods found in your grocery store too. Make the nutrition label your best friend; that’s why our government now requires food products to be labeled. If you’re struggling with weight and/or cholesterol, do yourself a favor and just don’t eat out. Instead make something at home where you can control what you are eating. And rethink taking someone out to dinner as a gift for a holiday or a birthday; you will just be contributing to their risks of a heart attack instead of doing something nice. Take them to a museum or park instead where you both can chat as you walk. To look up nutritional profiles for restaurant choices, go to Calorieking.com/foods/caloriesin-fast-food-chains-restaurants_c-Y2lkPTIx.html The National Institutes of Health has an excellent booklet titled “Lowering Your Cholesterol With TLC” that is available online at Nhlbi.nih.gov/ files/docs/public/heart/ chol_tlc.pdf It’s a comprehensive guide to lowering cholesterol offering information about both diet and lifestyle and explaining the different factors that make up your cholesterol profile and what influences those numbers to go higher or lower. By-the-way, when you have your cholesterol checked by your doctor, make sure that you fast a full 12 hours before you have your blood drawn. That means, you only take in water during that time. Your results will be more accurate and will provide the information that you and your doctor will need to have a meaningful conversation. Your results will include your total cholesterol, your triglycerides, your LDL or low density lipids, and your HDL or high-density lipids. Each component has a target range that is recommended based on your sex, age, weight, etc. To remember the difference between LDL and HDL think “your high-density lipids should be high, and your low-density lipids should be low”. You can tame the cholesterol killer, but you have to be vigilant and determined. Remember, you are ghting for your life. t Debbie Anne is a Public Health Nurse with Frederick County Health Department in Frederick, Maryland and has particular expertise in the eld of HIV/AIDS. She has served in the eld for thirteen years and in 2014 was awarded a Governor s Citation for her work with Marylanders living with HIV/AIDS.
QUALITY OF LIFE
Violet’s New Friends
Violet’s Vet
Dr. Tony Calo
‘How Will I Know it’s Time?’ I am happy to report that at this time, all of our dogs are healthy and vibrant. Both Violet and Henry are relatively young at five and three years old, respectively. Daisy, at 11, is older but she is still full of life. Her recent physical examination, blood work, and chest radiographs were exemplary even for a dog that is technically considered geriatric. We are not dealing with any medical issues and no one is taking anything more than joint supplement and routine heartworm and flea and tick prevention. I am thrilled by the happiness and well-being that my dogs are enjoying. Being a veterinarian however, I am also keenly aware that this can be a tenuous state. The picture-perfect world I just described can change in an instant with a diagnosis of a terminal condition such as heart disease, kidney failure, or certain cancers. These medical issues can often be managed with excellent quality of life for extended periods of time. At some point, however, the disease stops responding to therapy, subtly or not so subtly. When this occurs, a new normal may be established. This can lead to shorter walks or longer naps during the day, or adding new foods to keep the appetite going. Eventually, the new normal declines into alterations in quality of life and bigger questions about how and when to make a euthanasia decision. This is all leading to a questions that I hear more than almost any other: “How will I know it’s time?” The questions itself is a request for guidance and also for assurance that making a euthanasia decision is reasonable. An answer that I will never give is “You will know when it’s time.” This implies an easy answer, a simple gauge, or the unrealistic
hope that your pet will give you a knowing look that tells you is it okay to let go now. Instead, quality of life is a continuum that has to be measured in many ways and carefully examined on a monthly, weekly, and daily basis. To say that your pet will not “tell you” the right time to make a euthanasia does not deny the closeness of the bond or the tightness of the relationship, rather it deepens that bond because it means you have to listen more, pay attention more, and love more than any other time in your pet’s life. So then how does one listen to their dog or cat and assess their quality of life when age and disease sets into your lives. The most basis of these include appetite, hydration, mobility, pain, interest in their surroundings, and hygiene. The variables are not a simple check list. They cannot be evaluated individually. It is easy to assume that a dog is having a reasonable quality of life if they still eating, but what if they cannot get up to walk to the food and water bowls, what if they cannot get up to go outside to relieve themselves. Pain and mobility are immensely important factors to a dog. No being able to walk to the water bowl can lead to dehydration and disinterest in surroundings. These quality-of-life variables are somewhat objective but are never easy to assess when associated with the pain of losing a friend or the guilt that may accompany a euthanasia decision. I tell my clients that once a terminal condition is diagnosed, and when there is no reasonable expectation of making a pet’s life improve, it is very reasonable to consider euthanasia. I also carefully explain that having the ability to make a euthanasia Luckily, still in the is a burden purple of health but also a gift. It is not decision that should be associated with guilt. It is extremely selfless and extremely loving to be able to say, “I love you so much that I do not want to see you get any worse.” By making a euthanasia decision, the stress that can accompany a natural death such as pain, gasping, for air, or hemorrhage can be avoided. Your pet can face death surrounded by love and respect. I have rarely heard back from a
Nitrous here and I am a handsome laid back Rottweiler who needs a forever home. I am very intelligent and know commands like sit, down and paw. I love long walks, food, and attention. If you stop petting me or if you don’t pet me right away I will sometimes give you my paw as an incentive to pay attention to me. In my previous home I lived with kids and another dog named Diesel. We love being together so if you have room for two big teddy bears like us come on out to meet us. If you don’t have room, then choose one of us because neither of us will disappoint. See ya soon! t The adoption fee is $100 for Nitrous For more information, visit Bmorehumane.org.
Nitrous
client that he or she felt that made a euthanasia decision too soon. More often, I hear that it was the hardest decision to make but one that ultimately was a final act of love. I have not been in the position to have to make this decision in my own life for some time, but I can say for sure that I understand the pain, the guilt, and the fear. I can also say with certainty that I
would never go back if I could and change one these decisions. Looking back, I know for sure that it was most caring and loving thing I could do for my pets. Goodbyes are painful, but you should not feel guilty about letting go. t
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DINING OUT
Finger’s Food
Richard Finger
Wet City 223 W Chase Street, Baltimore 443-873-6699
When I’d been asked to go to a place called Wet City in the heart of the gayborhood, I wasn’t sure if I needed to wear a rubber suit or not. As the establishment explains, “When the rest of the nation went dry during Prohibition, Maryland was the only state that refused to pass an enforcement act to support the federal restrictions…we love calling Baltimore our home, and think this wet city’s history is worth bragging about.” In other words, Maryland kept the alcohol flowing when the rest of the nation did not. Now that have the restaurant’s name all squared away, let me tell you about our dining experience there.
wide for all flavors and We had met our good friends, Doug and tastes. Ryan, our servGeorge, for a drink at Leon’s, and er, told us that there mutually decided to give are 20 beers on tap this new place Some food with and they change eva try. From your drink? ery few weeks. The other friends same is true for we’d heard Wet their assortment of City looked like cocktails. As for a high school the food menu, cafeteria but the the opposite is food was worth true. Sure, there trying. My friends were starters, couldn’t be more salads, sandright. We walked into wiches, small an open dining room plates, and with predominantmain entrees, ly white walls. There but the opwere not too many tations were bles and chairs, but they limited. We decided do certainly remind one to share the Chips and Dip ($3), of school days. The bar which were homemade with a special dipwas busy. Given the open space, noise travelled f r e e l y ping sauce. Dinner was off to a good start, throughout, so it was a bit difficult to hear the chips were great! For our meals, we each ordered our friends sitting across from us. As you’d imagine from a bar, there something different. George ordered the were many drink options offered, with a Chicken and Blue Cheese Fritter (smoked mix of hand-crafted beers on tap offer- blue cheese, strawberry chutney, cilantro ing varying levels of alcohol content. For – $13), Doug ordered the Grilled Cheese those of you that enjoy beer, the variety is (with chicken confit, apples, pear jam, and
Presque magni que!
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goat cheddar – $13), Nick had a simpler meal, Grilled Caesar with Chicken ($14), and I ordered the simplest meal, the No Temp Burger (five-ounces with American cheese, house ketchup, house pickle, and fries – $9). Keep in mind, there are other options on the limited menu ranging from a Lamb Burger (8 ounces, merquez spice, saffron taziki, Cherry Glen feta, packed shallots with fries – $16), Korean Best Empanadas (Korean BBQ short ribs, kimchi vinaigrette, spicy pickles, and chili sauce – $10), and Steak ‘n’ Egg Ramen (braised beef cheek, soft egg, and house noodles, kimchi, and pickles – $14). Overall, we enjoyed our respective meals well enough. I found it interesting that the menu options seemed more likely to be found at a more traditional restaurant setting, not at a bar. We all agreed that due to the open space, it felt as if we were not dining alone. It was challenging to focus on our friends. So, overall, I’d say if your intentions are to share some drinks and light laughter with your mates, I’d definitely recommend Wet City for that purpose. If you are looking for a place to spend some quality time with your friends and loved ones, start with a drink at Wet City, and then take it to a quieter place. t
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YOUR MONEY
The More you Know About
Business
Richard Finger
More than Butterflies in the Stomach In recent weeks, I’ve been discussing with some friends and family about the psychological effects of interviewing, especially through the various stages of recruitment. Some of us coming from a place of securing a job due to unemployment, others actively seeking new employment with secure jobs, and yet others passively contacted by recruiters, but nonetheless, interviewing for a new job. From my perspective, I was listening intently, particularly from the perspective of candidate care through each phase. All of us agreed that once contacted for
a phone interview, there is a high level of excitement from the candidate and the recruiter. From the candidates looking for a new job due to not having one, or looking to leave one, there is certainly a feeling of hope. For the passive candidate, the recruiter is using the power of persuasion to gain interest in a new opportunity. In all scenarios, the phone interview is the gateway to an in-person interview. A brief discussion about the job, the company, your qualifications, and ultimately, if things get to this point, the topic of compensation comes up. Given these phone interviews do not generally last a long time, the level of psychological investment is quite low. If the process ends at this point, surly there is disappointment at another opportunity gone by. For the passive candidate, a phone screen that leads no further has little to no impact, generally speaking. At this point the interviewer is most courteous, even with an unsuccessful outcome. Let’s consider now that the interview has made it to the next phase. Now candidates are preparing: fine-tuning resumes,
The psychological effects and pitfalls of interviewing
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researching the company, researching the interviewers, preparing questions, rehearsing answers, etc. The level of psychological investment becomes greater, the anticipation higher, and moreover, the hopefulness greater. The recruiter, whether representing the company directly or a search firm, is taking the utmost care to coordinate the interview schedule, contact the candidate beforehand, and is taking more time and effort to make this an enjoyable experience for all involved. Unfortunately, it is what happens after the interviews are completed that is most concerning to me, and the impact to the candidate can be devastating. Likely, if the in-person interviews go well, the level of candidate care does not fall off. For purposes of this article, I will take the liberty of leaving that scenario to the side. Let’s examine the cases of candidate care after interviews proved fruitless. In several situations, the recruiter never communicated back to the candidate, no email, no phone call. For the first week or two of silence, this leaves the candidate feeling anxious, not knowing whether it is “yes” or “no.” After a longer period of time elapses, the reality of “no” becomes clearer, which can leave the candidate feeling psychologically gutted, with no sense of closure. Then, there is the case where shortly thereafter the interview, the candidate receives a brief email, thanking him/her for his/her time, but they went with another candidate. The candidate may have a sense of closure, but this form of communication leaves the candidate angry, with no opportunity to discuss the feedback that lead to this decision.
There were cases of the recruiter contacting the candidate by phone. In one case, the recruiter’s tone of voice completely changed from when the process was still ongoing. My friend stated the recruiters voice was monotone, and in one a few very concise sentences, “Thanks for considering us, but we went with another candidate,” followed by an abrupt click of the phone. This call coming after almost a month of time had elapsed from the interviews. Based on how the story was relayed to me, I’d say my friend felt several emotions at once: disappointed in herself, angry at how the company went about communicating the message, and, after opening up a bit more, the experience rocked her confidence. Finally, in another case, the recruiter couldn’t have been nicer, telling the candidate that the company had hired an internal candidate that had surfaced at the last moment. She was most apologetic, and even said that the decision was made by others, and was politically motivated. My friend felt it was a case of bad luck, definitely disappointed in the outcome, but grateful the recruiter was honest and truthful, and even shared some of the direct feedback from those that interviewed him. This extra step helped with his confidence. As for me, after listening to these real stories, it left me wanting to be more sensitive to all candidates that I come across looking for a new opportunity. I will be more mindful of how I am treating people, and realize that this may have immediate and longer-term impacts on their psyche. Lastly, I realize that my actions do impact the reputation of the company of which I represent. It is up to me to take the necessary care to maintain it throughout the interview process. t
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LEATHER LINE
Leather
Line
Rodney Burger
Updates and Upcoming Dates In the last two issues I’ve written about some of the area leather contests held this time of year. Here’s an update on some newly-sashed leather titleholders and details on contests coming up soon. Alyssa Durnien from Hackettstown, New Jersey, and Todd Apple from Inwood, West Virginia, were sashed Mr. and Ms. Woods 2017 on September 17th during Leather Weekend III at the Woods Campground in Lehighton, Pennsylvania. This annual gathering, which gets bigger every year, included vending by Passional Boutique from Philadelphia as well as parties
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hosted by Mid-Atlantic Leatherwomen United; Bears, Bikers, and Mayhem 7; and the Jersey Amazons. Even leather icon Mama Sandy Reinhardt traveled from California to judge the contest and attend this fun weekend. Many folks in the area may already know John-John Punki from New York City. He was everywhere last year representing New York’s Rock Bar (185 Christopher Street) as Mr. Rock Bear 2015. I was thrilled to learn that this former president of ONYX N.Y. / Northeast took home the Mr. Eagle NYC 2017 title on October 1st at the Eagle NYC. He is such a nice person and so very involved in the community. Guess the good guys don’t always finish last. Can’t wait to see him again soon and congratulate him in person. In the next issue I will let you know who took home the titles of American Leatherman, American Leatherwoman, and American Leatherboy 2016 from the annual American Brotherhood Weekend (ABW) held in Chicago on October 7th to 11th. The sendoff party for three members of Baltimore’s leather community heading to Chicago to compete was lots of fun. I was glad I could be at The Loft at Grand Central on Friday, September 30th to wish Sir Kev-
OCTOBER 14, 2016 • BALTIMOREOUTLOUD.COM
in Lowery, Margaret Irene, and boy david zeidler well at ABW. It was a fun evening with Jell-O shots and a live auction of items donated by the ShipMates Club, COMMAND, Baltimore OUTLoud, and even a beautiful abstract painting by boy david. Plus there was a large cake for everyone to share to make the evening even more festive. The ABW sendoff was not the only leather event going on in Baltimore on September 30th. COMMAND, MC, also hosted a very successful play party at the Charm City Play Mr. Eagle Space (252 West NYC 2017 23rd Street) with John-John over eighty kinkPunki sters in attendance. Next up for Baltimore, is COMMAND’s big Mr. Maryland Leather 2017 weekend, which begins on Thursday, November 3rd, with a gear / fetish party and cigar social at the Baltimore Eagle. On Friday, November 4th there will be cocktail parties hosted by Mr. Maryland Leather titleholders, the ShipMates Club, and Mid-Atlantic Onyx at the new host hotel, Hotel Indigo (24 West Franklin Street) followed at 10 p.m. by the official meet-and-greet at The Loft
at Grand Central. The Mr. Maryland Leather 2017 Contest takes place at 2 p.m. on Saturday, November 5th at the Baltimore Eagle. Saturday evening will bring COMMAND’s anniversary dinner at the Hotel Indigo, a victory party for the new Mr. Maryland Leather at the Baltimore Eagle, and a play party at the Charm City Play Space. For details, tickets, and more information visit Commandmc.org. Also coming up in November is the Mr. D.C. Eagle 2017 Contest. This contest is scheduled for 9 p.m. November 19th at the D.C. Eagle (3701 Benning Road NE). The judges will be International Mr. Leather 2016 Tigger Bailey, International Ms. Leather 2016 Lascivious Jane, Mr. Mid-Atlantic Leather 2016 Todd Leavitt, Mr. D.C. Eagle 2016 Danny Kaylor-Hawkins, Mr. Eagle NYC 2016 “Q”, Mr. San Francisco Eagle 2016 Cody Elkins, and Mr. D.C. Eagle 2002 Herb Kaylor-Hawkins. It will be a big weekend at the D.C. Eagle. These are just two upcoming leather events. Come out and join the fun. You will want to save these dates. t
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MARYL AND RENAISSANCE
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