Senior Living Magazine Island Edition October 2010 by INSPIRED 55+ Lifestyle Magazine

OCTOBER 2010 TM

Vancouver Islandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 50+ Active Lifestyle Magazine

Fall Fashions blend classic lines with fun details

What Do Women Want? Designer Simon Chang knows! Mystery Writer Nicola Furlong Steal Away to Salt Spring! Lovespoon Carver David Western

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(Vancouver Island) is published by Stratis Publishing. Publisher Barbara Risto Editor Bobbie Jo Reid

editor@seniorlivingmag.com Contributors Norman K. Archer, Carole Blake, Goldie Carlow, Jane Cassie, Veronique de Silva, Judee Fong, Gipp Forster, John W. Heintz, Sheila Martindale, Pat Nichol, Bonnie Pollard, Bobbie Jo Reid, Michael Rice, Rosalind Scott, Carol Sheehan, Vernice Shostal, Barbara Small, Alixe Wallis Copy Editor Allyson Mantle Advertising Manager

Barry Risto 250-479-4705 For advertising information, call 250-479-4705 sales@seniorlivingmag.com Ad Sales Staff

Ann Lester 250-390-1805 Mathieu Powell 250-589-7801 Barry Risto 250-479-4705 Contact Information – Head Ofﬁce

Senior Living Box 153, 1581-H Hillside Ave., Victoria BC V8T 2C1 Phone 250-479-4705 Toll-free 1-877-479-4705 Fax 250-479-4808 E-mail ofﬁce@seniorlivingmag.com Website www.seniorlivingmag.com Subscriptions: $32 (includes GST, postage and handling) for 12 issues. Canadian residents only. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher. Senior Living is an independent publication and its articles imply no endorsement of any products or services. The views expressed herein are not necessarily those of the publisher. Unsolicited articles are welcome and should be e-mailed to editor@seniorlivingmag.com Senior Living Vancouver Island is distributed free throughout Vancouver Island. Stratis Publishing Ltd. publishes Senior Living Vancouver Island (12 issues per year) and Senior Living Vancouver & Lower Mainland (12 issues per year). ISSN 1710-3584 (Print) ISSN 1911-6403 (Online)

FEATURES 4 A Nice Surprise

A retired nurse tries her hand at modelling.

6 What Women Want

Designer Simon Chang’s tips for staying stylish.

12 Colour Signs

Can your astrological sign help you select the colours that suit you best?

DEPARTMENTS 42 Classiﬁeds 46 BBB Scam Alert

COLUMNS 3 The Family Caregiver by Barbara Small

14 Timeless Beauty

30 Bygone Treasures

18 Looking Fabulous

40 Victoria’s Past Revisited

Makeup tools and tips for mature women. Fall 2010 mixes classic lines with fun details.

22 The Art of Recycling

Reduce, reuse, recycle is not a new concept.

by Michael Rice

by Norman K. Archer

43 Ask Goldie

by Goldie Carlow

24 Chocolate, Murder and Mayhem 47 Outrageous & Courageous Mystery writer Nicola Furlong took a part-time passion and turned it into a full-time vocation.

28 Carving Memories

Lovespoon carver David Western connects to the heritage and romance of his art.

32 Sister Time on Salt Spring

Sisters hop the ferry for a weekend getaway.

36 Passion, Purpose and Meaning

by Pat Nichol

48 Reﬂections: Then & Now by Gipp Forster

Cover Photo: Retired nurse turned Victoria model Lynda Cox. Story page 4. Photo: Veronique de Silva

Author and stroke survivor Patricia Pitcher embraced a challenge that restored her health.

44 Signed by a Souper President In a chance of a lifetime, a Victoria bridge group visits the White House.

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THE FAMILY CAREGIVER

ARE YOU NEW TO CAREGIVING?

Home Support Services Designed to help people remain independent and in their own homes as long as possible, home support includes personal assistance with daily activities, such as bathing, dressing, grooming and light household tasks. If the care recipient meets the eligibility criteria through the local health authority, he or she can receive subsidized home support. Otherwise, home support is available for a fee through private home support agencies.

o you find yourself providing more assistance to a relative or friend who is elderly or in declining health? Have circumstances changed suddenly in your family due to an accident or sudden illness? Over one million people in B.C. find themselves in these circumstances as they take on the role of caregiver to a family member or friend. More time and energy will be used up navigating the health-care system, finding resources or figuring out how to meet someone else’s personal and medical needs. Being a caregiver brings many new demands and responsibilities as well as a multitude of emotions. Feeling overwhelmed, guilty, resentful, anxious or even angry in response to the stress of the new situation, worry around your family member’s health or fear about how everyone’s life is going to change is natural. You don’t have to take this journey alone. In fact, it is essential you ask for help and support from the beginning so you don’t burn out. Also, it is important to find ways to maintain your own interests, activities and social support so you don’t lose yourself completely while taking care of someone else. Many organizations and services are available to help. These include:

Respite Services Respite can provide family caregivers with a physical and emotional break from the demands of caregiving. Respite can be for a couple hours or a couple weeks. It can take place in the care recipient’s home, in a residential care facility or the care recipient can attend an adult day centre. Other Community Health Services Various other forms of assistance – physiotherapy, occupational therapy and nutritional advice – are available through the Home and Community Care department of your local health authority or through private businesses. Family Caregiver Support Organizations Several non-profit agencies have been established solely to provide information, education and support for family caregivers. These organizations offer newsletters, support groups, educational workshops and resources about issues of concern to

BY BARBARA SMALL

caregivers. A province-wide list is available at the Family Caregivers’ Network Society at 250-384-0408 or on their website at www.familycaregiversnetwork.org Condition-Speciﬁc Organizations Community agencies, such as the Multiple Sclerosis Society or Alzheimer’s Resource Centre, offer services for family caregivers that are unique to those specific circumstances and can provide information about the progress of that disease so you can be better prepared for the future. Volunteer Agencies Volunteers are available to assist, including driving to medical appointments, visiting, reassurance calls, assistance with gardening and other services. SL Next month: Legal Considerations for Caregivers Barbara Small is the Program Development Coordinator for Family Caregivers’ Network Society located in Victoria, BC. www.familycaregiversnetwork.org

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Fashion & Beauty

A Nice Surprise Retired nurse turned fashion model Lynda Cox answered a casting call advertisement on a whim.

BY VERNICE SHOSTAL

Photo: Veronique de Silva

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etired nurse and current model Lynda Cox was reading an issue of Canadian Living magazine when she spotted an interesting ad by clothing chain Tabi. The clothier was looking for a model over age 40, and promised the top four contestants a four-day stay in Toronto complete with a makeover and photo shoot. Lynda answered the ad and, to her surprise, was one of the lucky finalists. Although she didn’t win the overall prize, Lynda enjoyed her experience in Toronto. Wondering how she could take advantage of her new-found knowledge, she contacted Barbara Coultish Talent and Model Management in Victoria and landed a job as one of their older models. “It has been a great experience and I am fortunate that I can do this for fun,” says Lynda. “One of the challenges of being an older model is that there is a limit to the amount of work available.” Though Vancouver or one of the other larger Canadian cities would

Fashion & Beauty provide more opportunities for Lynda, she’s happy living and working on the Island. “I am a lover of fashion, probably because I always had to wear a uniform to work. It just made clothing more important during my time off,” she says.

she sought out another adventure. Lynda accepted a flight attendant position with Air Canada and, after a short training course in Montreal, moved to Toronto where her flights originated. Later, she was transferred to Vancouver.

“I didn’t plan on becoming a model and certainly didn’t expect to win a place in the Tabi contest.” Lynda follows fashion magazines for inspiration. Fashion shows are also a good place to see current trends and suitable outfits for a more mature person. Another reliable source of information are her daughters, who are knowledgeable about contemporary fashion and give tips on what styles complement her and how to wear new items. “There are clothes made now for every body type and beauty products for all types of skin,” Lynda says. “It takes a little time to find the right choices, but it feels good to get it right and so worth the effort.” Lynda grew up in Calgary. Without the financial resources for a postsecondary education, Lynda chose to train as a nurse where she was able to get her training while she worked in the hospital. “Luckily, I loved it,” she says. “Calgary General was a great place to train.” After her training, Lynda followed some friends to Hawaii where she worked at Queens Medical Centre in Honolulu for two years during the Vietnam War, a time when Hawaii was a preferred R & R spot for the American troops, “so it was a pretty lively place to be.” After a while, Lynda yearned for the changing seasons and returned to Canada where she got a job at Burnaby General Hospital. Three years later,

Most of Lynda’s flights were overseas and many took her to London. During those years, the IRA was pretty active, says Lynda, and all luggage and handbags had to be checked for bombs whenever they went to the theatre or any gathering place in London. “A little scary and it really made me appreciate home.” Lynda enjoyed her career with the

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airlines and, perhaps, if she’d not met her husband, may have stayed with Air Canada. Living in Invermere, her husband’s hometown, however, was not conducive to an airline job, so she returned to nursing. Later, the couple moved to Port Alberni on Vancouver Island and then to their current home in Cowichan Bay. Lynda takes advantage of every available opportunity to try new things. “I didn’t plan on becoming a model and certainly didn’t expect to win a place in the Tabi contest,” she says, “so it has all been a very nice surprise and makes life interesting.” In addition to her modelling, Lynda enjoys biking, hiking, and taking courses offered at ElderCollege and Vancouver Island University. Currently, she is interested in improving her French and continuing her genealogical research. “It’s nice to be at the age of life where I can learn just for my own interest.” SL

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OCTOBER 2010

Fashion & Beauty

WHAT WOMEN WANT Member of the Order of Canada and Canadian fashion icon Simon Chang offers tips and tricks for ﬁnding a woman’s signature style

BY BOBBIE JO REID

hen it comes to looking stylish, renowned fashion designer and Vancouver native Simon Chang knows what women want. Boomers and seniors today are different from previous generations. Women now are fit, body6

SENIOR LIVING

aware and stay in shape longer. And they are looking for comfortable, casual clothes that fit their active and adventurous lifestyles. “Older women today are younger,” says Simon. In an industry that idolizes youth, Simon is one designer

who explores options for women’s changing fashion needs through all stages of their lives. Sixty-somethings don’t want to wear what 20-somethings wear, and vice versa. The solution is a designer who talks to and, more importantly, listens to his clients. The result is wearable, washable, workable pieces that women can easily put together to develop their own signature style. “I try to adapt my collection and it makes total sense,” says Simon, who launched Simon Chang Concepts Inc., based in Montreal, in 1983. “As a designer, you have to be out there talking to people.” And being in the world, not tucked behind a desk, is why the women who wear his clothes love this successful yet affable designer. “I like the idea of knowing more about people who have something to say. Women won’t buy clothes that aren’t wearable,” says Simon. “Women are very vocal, especially mature women.” Because of the youthfulness of this generation, it’s easy to turn current fashion into more flattering fits – for those armed with the right knowledge. And the most important knowledge: every woman should know her own body. Since women’s bodies change as they age, even if they remain slim, knowing what to enhance and what to downplay can make all the difference. (See tips and tricks sidebar)

“You don’t want to dress like your granddaughter, but grandma can still be hip.” Simon’s older clientele have told him they feel invisible as they age – they feel ignored. “As you get older, you have to make a statement,” he says. To achieve a signature look, go for a fabulous accessory like glasses, jewelry, shoes, handbags or scarves. “You can’t be invisible!” “I love older women in colour,” says the designer. “With colour, women display a confidence and it rejuvenates the look of the outfit. Women project a happy mood when they wear a beautiful colour.” Focus on ageless pieces, like colourful scarves and accessories. “You don’t want to dress like your granddaughter, but grandma can still be hip.” People are not slotted into age categories as much as they used to be. “We don’t have to be slotted,” says Simon. “Marketers try to group us, but it’s just marketing dialogue. It’s not real.” “In the fashion industry, boomers are almost the visible minority that nobody wants to talk about, except they are

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the majority. They still appreciate arts and culture and music and movies (which they pay full price for instead of downloading free online),” says Simon. But the shift hasn’t happened in the marketplace. “We need a new marketing company to address this demographic, which is hip, cool, active, in fabulous shape, look great and are not dead!” Simon believes department stores don’t understand their clients. They carry too many products and don’t listen to the needs of their shoppers. Consumers are lost because nothing fits properly. “It’s frustrating for a lot of women,” he says. Women who want to look professional, sophisticated and well put together need to go for quality. Specialty stores and boutiques carry clothing that is expertly made and conformed to the needs of their clients. Simon suggests buying good quality clothes and making them work. For the budget conscious, stretch dollars by buying separates, perhaps five easy pieces and develop several seasonless outfits. A great look can be achieved without spending a lot of money. Accessories are perfect! Boomers and seniors have to find fashion lines they identify with. Some lines fit too small; they are for young girls. “Women in this age group have experimented with style all their lives. They understand themselves more, so they know what flatters,” says Simon. “Don’t follow trends. Wear things that look good on you.” For example, skinny jeans are very current, but they don’t look good on everyone. So, women need to make adjustments and modifications to work with their body types and style. Heel heights can also be adjusted to be more comfortable and practical to suit one’s lifestyle. “Be memorable,” says Simon. Recycle pieces from for-

mer decades. “There’s a lot to play with in [vintage].” Styles repeat themselves and come back in slightly different forms. “It’s about finding your true self.” SL And all women want that.

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Simon’s Tips and Tricks: Neck

– With sun damage, crêpelike skin and creases, many women are conscious of this area of their bodies. They don’t want to be totally covered up with tight-fitting turtlenecks, so softer, breathable fabrics that hang beautifully in this area can address those concerns.

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Fashion & Beauty

Arms – Even while women can

helping women of any age feel more confident and less inhibited by little rolls. Simon recommends them for all women.

maintain a youthful appearance in their faces, parts of their bodies may have sagging skin (raise your arms if this applies to you). Many women don’t want to expose their arms, but in warmer weather, it’s hard to stay covered up. Simon suggests avoiding sleeveless options, but going for a slightly longer sleeve in a lightweight fabric. Or pairing a cover-up to an outfit that emphasizes bare arms.

Fabrics

– When it comes to fabrics, Simon can’t say enough about jersey. It is appropriate for older women because it’s comfortable, flattering, casual, travels well and isn’t fussy. Look for no-nonsense, easy-care fabrics that better suit your lifestyle. Simon looks for seasonless fabrication. With travel, climate fluctuations and indoor heating and cooling systems, Simon tries to design adaptable clothes. Layers are the way to do this. “I love stuff you can wear yearround and add to,” he says. “It’s great to have things that you love to wear.

Waist

– Some women experience a thickening of their waistlines as they age. If that is the case, clothes should not be too tight-fitting. Go for a relaxed rather than cinched shape around the waist. Instead of the chunky tight

belts that you may have worn in your youth, a relaxed chain belt might be more flattering.

Knees

– Even thin legs can reveal a woman’s age. Gravity works on the skin on the knees, dragging the whole leg down and making skirt length more important. But even if you want to wear a shorter skirt, it’s possible to still look fabulous if you pair it with leggings. Leggings help to flatter a woman’s body, so short skirts or long tunics can keep you looking current and fashionable.

Jeans

– Women of all ages love jeans and want to wear them. Options like control-top jeans are flattering, comfortable, and offer a smoother look.

Under-garments

– Undergarments like Shapers smooth lines 10

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One uites Bedroom S t starting a Seasons don’t exist anymore, especially for people who travel globally.” Layering is a more sensible way to dress. Lighter weight fabrics accommodate the climate and are adaptable to the environment.

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– Most women don’t like pulling tight clothing over their heads. Tiny buttons aren’t practical. Some people have difficulty lifting their arms into tight turtlenecks: they find them suffocating. Even arm holes have to be cut precisely and more generously. Beautiful sleeves that are not too short – sometimes three-quarter length – are the way to go. “I don’t design garments that need an instruction pamphlet to put the outfit together,” says Simon. Beautiful draping can hide a tummy. Garments have to be cut properly so they hang right and cling in the right places. Women like their bottoms covered, so tops are designed a little longer to make women feel comfortable and SL confident. Find Simon Chang online at www.simonchang.com

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Photos and designs courtesy of Simon Chang Concepts Inc. OCTOBER 2010

Fashion & Beauty

Colour Signs

s a model, I learned that being tall and skinny was a definite plus, but the true pros in the business knew what they were there for – to make each outfit look irresistible. The clothes were the real stars. During the fifties, every self-respecting department store in Toronto held their fashion shows during the spring and fall while, during the off-season, one could be a house model in the garment district on Spadina Avenue. “Oh, she’s bustless, hipless and hopeless” was the favourite lament of a wonderful designer friend of mine – or if you were unfortunate enough to have an inch or two extra on the derriere “She’s got duck’s disease” was the verdict. I modelled outfits from their birth in the cutting room through the process of pinning and basting, followed by hand finishing and finally being photographed in the sample. I learned that only a good designer could deal with all height, weight and proportion issues. And some years later, returning to the fashion world and coordinating shows in B.C., I learned that putting fashion presentations together is an art form in itself. However, following some of these fashion shows, I noticed customers standing in complete bewilderment in front of

a dress display, seemingly not knowing where to begin in their quest for that special outfit. The question arose in my mind, “Where does one begin in the search for a look that truly spells you?” While style, fit and proportion do have an important place, I wondered what would be a key factor in bringing out one’s own individuality. My attempt to find answers began with colour. Colour is personal, and so much a part of our lives, we take it for granted. We say, “What a colourful person” to describe someone bright and energetic. “She looks at the world through rosecoloured glasses” brings into focus a positive and happy person. Being “green with envy” is another old expression, while the term, a “scarlet woman” was never intended as a compliment. Faber Birren was way ahead of me. He has devoted over 30 years to the study of colour, researching and writing several books explaining how colour communicates and elicits emotional responses. Birren’s work confirmed my ideas, but there was still an element missing. The last piece to fit the puzzle came while reading my horoscope. “When crazy things happen in the emergency room you can bet there’s a full moon out,” says a medical friend of mine. Because the tides are so influenced by the moon, it doesn’t take

BY ALIXE WALLIS

a great leap of faith to speculate our largely liquid bodies are equally affected. Add the pull of Uranus the planet of surprises, expansive Jupiter, intense Mars, strong Saturn, turbulent Pluto, emotional Neptune, plus Mercury, the planet of the intellect, together with the refinement of Venus and you can’t deny there’s a lot of cosmic energy at work. Plus, the planets are always moving! Astrological signs predict our personality traits and foretell our emotions. Colour creates moods and elicits emotional responses. Combining both should lead straight to your best colour. For me, the stars were in perfect alignment because everything fell nicely into place and the book Colour Signs was born. I wrote and designed it with its own colour wheel, to give a quick and easy reference to each sign’s best shades and tones. When holding seminars on the subject, it was gratifying when people shared stories of how the colour-wheel helped them. My little book made its way to the U.K., as well as Australia and can now be found on Senior Living’s online bookstore. So, if you’re curious to see whether you’re a Leo dressing in Taurus tones or, better still, to confirm you’ve instinctively been wearing the right shade all along, Colour Signs can be your guide. It’s sure to colour your fashion SL spectrum with new possibilities. For a copy of Alixe’s book, visit Senior Living magazine’s online bookstore at www.seniorlivingmag.com/bookstore

SENIOR LIVING

OCTOBER 2010

Fashion & Beauty

Timeless Beauty Makeup Tools and Tips

et’s face it (no pun intended), we’re all getting older. But that doesn’t mean we have to give in to the tiny assaults that time plays with the face and body. In fact, there are a few tricks you can tuck up your sleeve to keep you looking current – and minimize the signs of aging. To start, use sunscreen or sunblock (even in the winter and on overcast days) as part of your daily makeup ritual to avoid skin damage. Put it on your face and let it absorb for a couple minutes before applying the rest of your makeup. The first item to consider is foundation. Foundations, if not chosen and applied carefully, can make you look older and emphasize lines and wrinkles. Many think that the older you get, the more foundation you need to wear. On the contrary, heavy makeup can make you look older, filling in creases and large pores, making wrinkles and blemishes more obvious. A tinted moisturizer works best. It helps conceal, evens your skin tone and

provides moisture at the same time. A number of cosmetic companies offer tinted moisturizers, including non-hypoallergenic brands for those with sensitive skin or skin prone to blemishes. Many of these moisturizers also include a sunscreen of at least SPF 15. Lighter shades tend to show wrinkles more than darker shades, so pick a shade slightly darker than your normal skin and only use it on those parts of your face that have blemishes to hide or discolouration evened out. Should you add powder on top of

your foundation? Yes, but only lightly. It shouldn’t look caked on; just enough to slightly soften the shine left by a tinted moisturizer. Better yet, only use it on your nose and/or forehead, where oil tends to gather. Powder, if not used sparingly, can highlight wrinkles. Avoid using it around your eyes as it can settle in fine lines making them more prominent. A little concealer under the eyes can help cover up dark circles, but too much can make you look like a raccoon. Apply a few light dabs and carefully pat it with your ring finger to smooth it out for an even result. If you are using a foundation, put the concealer on first and gently pat the foundation on top to blend it in without disturbing the concealer.

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Make your eyes the focus of your face. Attractive, well made-up eyes can draw the emphasis away from imperfections in your skin. But don’t overdue it. Heavy makeup, applied anywhere on the face, can add years to your appearance. Black eyeliner and dark eyeshadow can look appealing on someone younger,

usually because they want to look older, and that’s exactly what it will do to you – make you look older. Mascara can help the appearance of sagging eyelids if you use it on the top eyelashes only. Apply a couple coats. Curling your lashes helps open your eyes and make them “pop” even more. If you want to try false eyelashes, apply them to the top lid only and use individual lashes, not whole lashes for a more natural look.

Three eyeshadow colours can give you a polished look. Blend the lightest colour over your brow bone. Put a medium shade on your lid, and a darker shade just in the crease. Blend

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all three well so that you don’t leave obvious lines where one stops and the other starts. Avoid bright, loud colours. Popular shades are earthy and more natural looking. Instead of liquid eyeliner, which can look harsh, apply a dark eyeshadow as your eyeliner. Use a wet thin brush to dab the eyeshadow into the upper lashes and the outer one-third of the lower lashes. Or use a soft eyeliner pencil and smudge it. Frame your eyes with well-groomed eyebrows. Don’t over-pluck your eyebrows. Leave them as natural looking as possible, and never substitute eyebrow pencil for the real thing. Over-plucking eyebrows or colouring in an eyebrow with heavy pencil dates your look. If you have sparse brows, you can learn to add a little more fullness with some soft strokes of an eyebrow pencil, but be sure you don’t go too dark or heavy. Thicker eyebrows can look great on someone like Brooke Shields, but when it is done artificially, it looks artificial. When applying blush, sweep it across the whole cheekbone, not just on the apple of the cheek. Concentrating blush in too small an area can give a clownish appearance. Use a large fluffy brush that helps spread the powder. A creamy blush can work well too. Just make sure you blend it out over the whole cheekbone. And don’t try to go too dark – keep it subtle for a natural look. Avoid the shimmer. It’s fun for young people, but on an older person’s skin, it tends to highlight every line, wrinkle and pore. Lips tend to get thinner as we grow older. We moisturize the rest of our face but often forget our lips. Find a lip balm or lipstick that adds moisture. This will help plump up the lips. Look for one that has a built-in sunscreen. Your lips can suffer the same damage from the sun as the rest of your face. Picking a colour that is a couple shades darker than your natural lip colour works well. Professional makeup artists often use three colours on the lips. The darkest shade outlines the lips; the next darkest shade starts to fill in the lip but doesn’t go all the way across the whole lip (blend so there’s no harsh line between the two). Apply

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An Invitation to all Seniors to

Thursday, October 7th, 2010 ~ 1:00 pm to 4:00 pm Come and enjoy all the things you love about Fall … the crispness in the air, a bountiful harvest and the wonderful aromas and tastes of the season. We invite you to join us as we host a complimentary afternoon to celebrate some of Fall’s favourite activities, tastes, sights and traditions. Let this season of colourful changes inspire you to visit your neighbourhood Amica retirement residence and experience our active lifestyle first hand. There’s no better time than now, to Fall in Love with Amica! For more information, visit www.amica.ca Port Coquitlam ~ Amica at Mayfair ~ 604.552.5552 Kerrisdale ~ Amica at Arbutus Manor ~ 604.736.8936 West Vancouver ~ Amica at West Vancouver ~ 604.921.9181 Burnaby ~ Amica at Rideau Manor ~ 604.291.1792 Victoria ~ Amica at Douglas House ~ 250.383.6258 Victoria ~ Amica at Somerset House ~ 250.380.9121 Sidney ~ Amica at Beechwood Village ~ 250.655.0849

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the lightest shade to the centre of the bottom lip and the crown on the upper lip – plumper lips with a few strokes. Applying a little lip gloss can also help create the illusion of fuller lips. Even a bit of Vaseline will do the trick. If you have sagging skin under your jawline, take the emphasis away from it by wearing attractive earrings or a pretty necklace that falls below the collarbone. But wearing both together can sometimes cause the opposite effect because the observing eye can get trapped between the earlobes and the chest, drawing attention to the neck area – the opposite of what you set out to accomplish. Deep lines or crepe-like patterning on your neck can be disguised with haircuts that fall just below the chin or slightly lower. For a great example of this, find some pictures of actress Helen Mirren. She has some great cuts and styles that flatter her face, suit her age and give great style. Long narrow scarves, especially those that have a linen or raw silk look to them are among the favoured accent accessories of today’s youth and have a European appeal. Wrapping it casually several times around the neck is a stylish way to cover up unattractive necklines. A little knowledge on how to update your appearance can take years off your looks. Experiment until you find the colours, products and techniques that work best for you; have fun with it! SL

OCTOBER 2010

Fashion & Beauty

Looking Fabulous in Fall 2010

BY BONNIE POLLARD MAYFAIR FASHION STYLIST

his season’s trends are easy to love: bringing comfort and classic lines with fun and interesting details. There are lots of mix and match separates, layers, textures and accent details to give everyone plenty of options to customize wardrobes to be both flattering to body proportions and lifestyles. Create fashionable flair with playful trend details, by layering textures with classic lines. Choose asymmetrical lines, cowl and shawl collars, boat and draped necklines in a variety of style lengths and voilà, a fabulous look in fall trends! Working with layers is the key for fall 2010. This season, the primary neutrals for key wardrobe pieces are black, grey and denim, teamed with shades of teal, purple and plum. Fall weather also inspires a secondary colour palette of rich browns, beige, olive greens, creams and reds. Floral Cardigan

and Rufﬂe Blouse Women’s Must Have Fall Trends: – Talbots

Denim jeans (dark denim wash) Blazer / Crop jackets Sweater coats Vests Slim cut pant Rufﬂes Texture and patterns – tweeds, herringbone, corduroy or plaids Accessories - scarves and belts Boots

Tips on how to best wear Fall Trends: DENIM JEANS – the No. 1 Essential Piece • Great to wear dressed up with heeled boots and crop 18

SENIOR LIVING

Cropped Knit Jacket – Jackie O inspired – Bellissima

blazer layers or dressed down with draped sweater layers. Choose dark wash denim for increased versatility. • Stretch is the best choice for styles that flatter body proportions. BLAZER / CROP JACKETS – including Boyfriend blazers / Leather bomber jackets / Military inspired jackets / Tweed blazers / Crop waist-length jackets / Plaid wool blazers • Choose textured or patterned jackets that have fun accent detailing and in various style lengths to suit body type.

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Women’s Must Have Fall Trends: Denim jeans (dark denim wash) Blazer / Crop jackets Sweater coats Vests Slim cut pant Rufﬂes Texture and patterns – tweeds, herringbone, corduroy or plaids Accessories – scarves and belts Boots

9/9/2010

2:43 PM

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an exceptional moment, among friends. Carlton House of Oak Bay is one of Canada’s most sought after senior’s residences, designed for the total enjoyment of our residents. Among the highlights are inviting gathering places such as our bistro, lounge and conservatory — great spaces in which to share wonderful moments with fellow residents and friends. Learn more about an exceptional life at Carlton House. All-inclusive suites are available from $2495 a month. Call Seona Stephen today at 250-595-1914 www.carltonhouse.ca AN EXCEPTIONAL LIFE

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Fashion & Beauty • Sleeveless or short-sleeve styles – all create excellent layering looks. • Fitted knit or tuxedo styles should be in darker neutral colours. • Quilted or corduroy vests can be neutral or accent colours. SLIM CUT PANTS (in black) • No. 1 priority is choosing a style best for body type. • Leggings, skinny or tapered leg styles DO NOT suit everyone! • Slim cut, stovepipe or straight cut styles are more flattering and give the same fashion look. • Stretch fabric is the best choice.

Plaid Rufﬂe collar Blazer & Rufﬂe Scarf – Talbots

Mix and match dressy with casual: for example, jeans with a boyfriend blazer or a pencil skirt with military jacket. SWEATER COATS – Sweater vests / Cardigans • These vary from waist crop to car coat lengths. • Long drape collars / Flared hemlines / Shawl collars / Scarf drape collars • Carefully consider the best length and weight of knit to best suit body proportions. For example, petites best suit waist crop to thigh length in light to medium weight knits. • Many of the drape collar sweaters are designed to wear in multiple ways: tunics, wrapped, twisted, belted or one side drawn across to shoulder like a scarf. • Some longer styled sweaters are also worn as tunics or dresses with leggings and boots or slim-cut pants. VESTS – Tuxedo / Quilted / Knit 20

SENIOR LIVING

RUFFLES – add a little or a lot. • Try a ruffled scarf, ruffled collar details on sweaters and jackets or pintuck ruffled tops and camisoles. TEXTURE AND PATTERNS – tweeds, herringbone, corduroy or plaids • The key is to mix and match. Take casual chunky textured knits or rough wool blends and mix them with smooth

Portrait Collar Long Length Sweater Coat – Bellissima

Cropped Jacket in Golf Green – Talbots

silks and cottons. • Accents of suede, leather or faux fur are just as popular as ruffles and pleats detailing. ACCESSORIES • Pull it all together with great layers of accent details! • Scarves – multi-coloured, ruffles, floral, plaid. • Belts – choose thin belts in same or blended colour tones (wide belts are best on very petite waists). BOOTS - tall or short, heeled or flat, black or brown; this season, consumers can’t go wrong. • Wear them with everything – the sky’s the limit! • Necklaces – bold and chunky – collarbone or longer pendant lengths.

Fashion & Beauty Grey Leather Bomber Jacket – Bellissima

For everyone, layering and mixing it all together is truly the secret to this season’s fashion looks. Choose a few good quality and wellfitted essential pieces in classic lines and neutral colours. Add layered pieces that are fun and trendy by choosing a variety of tops, shirts and turtlenecks in colours, neutrals, patterns and textures. Above all, have fun playing with fall fashions! SL

Angled Knit Blazer – Bellissima

Men’s Must Have Fall Trends: Denim jeans (dark denim wash) Blazer / Crop jackets Zip track jackets Plaid shirts (layer with plain coloured T-shirts) Vests (knit or suit styled - black or dark grey) Slim cut pant (black or dark grey) Texture and patterns – tweeds, corduroy or plaids Button-up shirts in purple, teal or plum Selection of plaid or patterned ties, plus a great belt and pair of boots

Shawl Collar Sweater Vest – Bellissima

With over 20 years experience in the fashion and beauty industries, Bonnie Pollard is the host of weekly “fashion feature” on CHEK TV and fashion stylist for magazines, newspapers and television, as well as a local VIP Image Trainer, Public Speaker, Fashion Event Co-ordinator and Mayfair Shopping Centre’s Fashion Stylist.

OCTOBER 2010

The Art of Recycling BY SHEILA MARTINDALE

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randmas always want to help out, and spoiling the grandkids is one of the perks of the job. However, since my adult children waited an inordinately long time before starting their own families, I am a bit longer in the tooth than I might have been had the process begun earlier. Hence, getting on the floor and playing with toddlers is not an option, nor is carrying them for long distances or up and down stairs. So, aside from engaging the little ones in more sedentary ways, I try to assist with certain household tasks. Sewing is one of these or, to be more accurate, mending. It is an art not much practised these days, and certainly, a low task on most busy families’ to-do lists. But this grandma is always standing (or perhaps sitting) by with a needle and thread at hand, waiting to put certain items of clothing back into circulation rather than leave them lying around in an un-usable condition, or worse, thrown into the trash.

I was recently reviewing such a pile with my daughter-in-law, and chanced upon a beautiful sweater currently unworn because of a number of missing buttons. To her astonishment, I produced from my grab bag a collection of buttons of all shapes, sizes and colours, proceeded to pick out appropriate-looking ones and finally came up with the required number of matching items to repair the garment in question. In about 20 minutes, the job was done and the sweater looked as good as new. I suppose to anyone unable to remember the Second World War, such ancient methods of recycling must appear to date from the time of the Ark, but I’m sure I am not alone among seniors 22

SENIOR LIVING

who still practise these outmoded habits of conservation. When I was growing up, in an England desperately struggling to recover from six years of bitter warfare, recycling was a way of life, decades before it ever became an official policy. Each commodity had to last a long time, since we could not simply throw something out and go buy another. And nothing was discarded that could possibly be used for some other purpose. Thus, the daily newspaper was used to make “fire starters” for fireplaces, which were the only source of heat for our houses and our water. It was also used for lining shelves and drawers – an inadequate covering, which unfortunately left newsprint on whatever touched it. Naturally, no outhouse was complete without the same material, cut into appropriately sized squares. I suppose I was about 10 before I saw my first toilet roll. Ashes from fireplaces were stored and used on walkways to make icy or muddy surfaces fit for walking on. Envelopes were used repeatedly as part of the war effort to save paper. The government issued sticky labels, which folded over the top of a slit envelope and provided space for a new address. When so many labels had been mounted atop each other that the original paper was disintegrating, the envelope was then turned inside out and used as scrap paper for shopping lists and the like. I still save paper, reusing paper bags, never getting rid of unwanted documents until both sides have been written on, and opening gifts carefully so the paper and ribbon might be used again. Long before the blue box became part of every household, I kept my glass jars and plastic tubs for leftover food or to repackage food, which came in less sturdy wrapping, and I have never discontinued doing this. Tin cans were wrapped in leftover wallpaper and used as storage for a variety of odds and ends that would come in handy again someday. I remember the rain barrel that sat underneath the eavestrough downspout to catch the runoff from the roof. Looking back on a climate famous for its rainfall, I can’t recall why this might have been nec-

essary but since we did the laundry in a galvanized tub in the backyard it seems logical we would have used the water that was right there, and saved on our water tax. “Mend and make do” was one of our mottos, born out of necessity during times of extreme scarcity. No scrap of clothing or linen was ever discarded. When clothes could no longer be passed down from one sibling to another, they became rags for washcloths, dishcloths, floor cloths or dusters – everything was good for something. Shirts had their collars and cuffs removed, turned around and re-sewn so the frayed parts would not show. Sheets, which had worn down to nothing in the centre, were ripped apart and sewn together with the outsides in – a measure that lengthened the life of the bed linen, but was not particularly conducive to a good night’s sleep. And we darned socks, a practice that later carried me over the long years of my three boys’ adolescence and participation in team sports. After I had spent a couple of hours one evening mending a pair of athletic socks, my eldest son said “Gee, Mom, my locker partner is going to be pleased – those are his socks! I no longer reverse shirt parts or remake sheets but, of course, there still remains the inevitable and ubiquitous button box, which brings me back to my recent successful reintroduction of the sweater to my daughter-in-law’s wardrobe. I do believe that some of the buttons in my collection actually came over with me from England 44 years ago. Think what a saving to the environment has been made over the years by my putting these relatively indestructible items back into circulation. In many parts of the world, grandmothers are fighting for women’s equality, fighting against AIDS that orphans their grandchildren, fighting for girls’ education or for improvement to their economies. In Canada, we grandmothers can fight against landfill pollution and we can fight for the survival of this fragile planet. Let us just remember SL how it used to be done!

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Author Proﬁle

CHOCOLATE, MURDER AND MAYHEM

SENIOR LIVING

that’s totally different from solving murders.” Nicola feels one of the perks of researching is discovering new people such as her recent conversation with an ethnobiologist who spoke about 1,000-year-old bones or reading about Wendy Morton, the P.I. Poet featured in Senior Living magazine. Conversely, she believes the “downside” of research is that it can easily distract a writer and lead to information overload. So, Nicola adheres to a strict schedule of writing three hours a day before fleeing to her garden, biking through her neigh-

Photo: Judee Fong

n avid hockey player, chocolate lover, enthusiastic gardener and mystery writer, Nicola Furlong admits she is also the sixth of eight brothers and sisters, who stay closely connected. “There are eight furlongs in a mile, and I like telling people I’m from a mile of Furlongs!” Books played a large role in the Furlong family. “My father was a voracious reader and a great mystery fan who started all of his kids on John Dickson Carr, Ngaio Marsh, Rex Stout and Erle Stanley Gardner,” says Nicola. “It’s probably a bygone era now, but we found the books quite exciting. Before these writers, I would read my brothers’ Hardy Boys series and ignored the Nancy Drew books that were too fluffy.” Working as a consultant on environmental issues, a policy writer for the federal government and writing grant proposals for others, Nicola began using her spare time to write a successful series of six books, recently re-released in large print, called The Church Choir mysteries, featuring Gracie Parks. “It was my divine gig, and I really enjoyed writing them! I thought at the time this may be a niche for me to get into – lighthearted, interesting, fast-paced, an easy read,” she says. Instead, Nicola wrote more intense murder mysteries such as Teed-Off, A Hemorrhaging of Souls and Thy Will Be Done. Story ideas can come from anywhere – newspapers, television news or everyday life. “What works for me is either an image or an emotion. The seed of an idea starts germinating while I’m biking or gardening. If someone is experiencing a death or a tragic accident, I do the old ‘what if’ thing and how it affects that person. There’s a lot of stuff that grabs your attention, but whether or not it has the legs to become a novel, you have to work your way through it to find out,” she says. In each of her books, Nicola has fun researching activities that may involve her characters. For instance, in her psychological thriller of murder and mayhem, A Hemorrhaging of Souls, she says, “I took music lessons and found I couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket, but my protagonist Tempest Ivory studies to become an aspiring opera singer! I wanted her to have another life

BY JUDEE FONG

Flying off the online bookshelves, Nicola’s Youdunit Whodunit: How to Write Mysteries is a fascinating, easy-to-digest primer written for any writer, regardless of genre because the tips given are usable for any form of fiction writing. Her latest online primer is called Self Publish Your eBook in Minutes. Through Camosun College, Nicola teaches mystery writing and offers a popular ePublishing workshop. Her entertaining website/blog, www.epubbing.com is filled with tips, excerpts and timely interviews with current Canadian mystery writers. And, somewhere in her busy schedule, she self-promotes and markets her cleverly crafted murder mysteries. “I’m not a gregarious, outgoing, shake-your-hand kind of

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Rod Beattie

bourhood or searching for chocolate, preferably fudge. A departure from her murder mysteries, Nicola’s next book, Sisterhood of Shepherds, will be a heartwarming and inspirational journey of discovery, heartache, humour and redemption revolving around three sisters, Faith, Hope and Charly Shepherd. “It’s been an interesting challenge to modify my writing and to try a different genre,” says Nicola. One of Nicola’s non-writing passions is ice hockey. “I absolutely adore it! I’m in a fortunate position where I get to play three times a week with an all-men’s team. They’re all retired, in their 60s and annually compete in ‘Old-timers Hockey.’ I dedicate my fall/winter to playing ice hockey. I’m too young to play in their tournaments, but I get to play with them all the other times.” Pondering the possibility of a hockey playing protagonist or a hockey mystery, Nicola decides the story will “have to be something different with a new twist.”

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Author Proﬁle person,” says Nicola. “I’ve had to push myself to do it. I’ve never walked into a room without thinking about what I’ll say and what I’m likely to be asked.” She adds, “It’s like the ‘elevator pitch.’ When you see an editor in the elevator with you, you want to be ready with the three-minute pitch for your book.” For the 21st century, Nicola believes the trend will move to online books, read on electronic readers rather than paper books. “Because there are more inexpensive electronic readers available, people buying them are committed to reading ebooks, creating a definite demand and market for them. Enhanced books like my multimedia Quillr created for my website two years ago was really ahead of the times,” she says.

“Publishers are slowly producing books with multimedia capabilities and that will be the next wave of books in demand.” Fueled by chocolate and whipped into shape by cycling, walking, hockey and growing poppies, Nicola creates satisfying mysteries that are thoroughly researched and carefully plotted to delight armchair detectives everywhere. SL Nicola Furlong’s books can be purchased on online bookstores or by emailing her at epubbing@shaw.ca An excerpt from Sisterhood of Shepherds can be viewed on Nicola’s blog/ website at www.epubbing.com where she scopes out the crime scenes, scoops interviews on mystery writers and offers tips on writing that great Canadian murder mystery.

News Brief

Juan de Fuca 55+ Activity Centre Expands

he Juan de Fuca 55+ Activity Centre and West Shore Parks & Recreation Society are thrilled to announce the new addition to the 55+ Activity Centre, located next to the Juan de Fuca Recreation Centre in Colwood, B.C. For the last 10 years, a dedicated group of seniors has fundraised to help build the expansion. The additional facility space will address the growing membership of approximately 1,200 seniors. Operating in partnership with West Shore Parks & Recreation Society, the new building will provide space for seniors’ programs and other members of the community. The expansion has added three additional multi-purpose spaces and a much-needed elevator to access the lower level. Rooms will be used for a variety of activities for all ages. President of the 55+ Activity Centre Ruth Reynolds says, “It is so exciting for us! This new space will provide our membership with many more opportuniSL ties for programs.” For more information, call 250-474-8618.

SENIOR LIVING

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Arts & Entertainment

CARVING MEMORIES BY JUDEE FONG

Photos: Judee Fong

hen a young 17th century Welsh peasant wanted to show affection for his “lady love,” he carved her a wooden spoon and gave the handle a simple design, which showed his skills with an axe and a knife. Hand-carved lovespoons still exist in the 21st century. British Columbia’s David Western is an innovative, artistic carver, whose customized lovespoons are treasured by owners around the world. “Lovespoons were meant to be admired and displayed,” says David. “My family is Welsh and whenever we visited my grandparents and aunts, there were always lovespoons and other carvings mounted on the wall. I began researching the history and started making a few spoons while I was working as a cabinetmaker. The spoons represent a connection to my roots; it’s part of my Welsh heritage.” Wales is not the only country that has lovespoons, but is still a country that embraces the tradition. “In Sweden, a young man would carve a simple spoon first,” says David. “Over the winter, he may have carved half a dozen or more of these and would pass them out to whomever caught his eye. If he got a response, then he would carve a more detailed spoon to show off his skills.” “In Norway, the spoons weren’t carved at the start of a relationship, but it appeared on the wedding day as a symbol of unity. This would be a wooden spoon at each end of a long wooden chain, all carved from one piece of wood. “The couple would drape the chain around their shoulders and eat their first meal together using the spoons at either end of the chain. This has also been seen in Africa when some of the tribal customs were being observed and documented.” The original lovespoons were carved from local woods. David uses woods grown in British Columbia such as west-

ern maple, yellow cedar, poplar, alder and yew. In many of David’s spoons, Celtic knot work plays a large part. The classic Celtic knot work is created from one piece of wood and is considered one of David’s artistic specialties. Today, lovespoons sold as souvenirs in Wales and elsewhere keep this art in the public eye. Tourists purchase their machine-made souvenirs forgetting the true meaning behind them. Lovespoons are traditionally handmade with love from a single piece of wood. Each of David’s spoons has a story behind them. “For me, this is a wonderful job because people allow you into their lives to share their special memories,” he says. “Quirky things come out sometimes that become favourite features. I was asked to carve a spoon for an older woman whose kids wanted the spoon to tell her story. We had things that represented the kids, her husband, things she had done during the war. Twenty years ago, she had bought a pair of tiny frog earrings, which became her favourite piece of jew-

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SENIOR LIVING

Right, Carver David Western. Note the yellow cedar spoon (at the forefront of the photo) with the three balls and the chain links, which is a “wedding” spoon. The chain links are a symbol for loyalty and faithfulness, while the three tiny balls indicate the number of children in the future. The entire spoon is carved from one continuous piece of wood and often amazes amateur carvers. Left, samples of David’s lovespoons.

elry. When she examined her spoon, she immediately spotted the tiny frog carved into the handle.” David tells of a recent Chinese client in London who is married to a Welshman. They commissioned a spoon for her brother who is getting married in Hong Kong. “What they wanted was a spoon combining the Celtic and Chinese mix. I designed the handle showing the lucky Ming dynasty knot with a Chinese dragon coming around one side and the Celtic knot with the Welsh dragon coming the other way ending with two bowls – one at each end of the Chinese and Welsh dragon’s tails. Then I got some red shoe polish, the lucky red, MEDICAL RESEARCH WARRANTY and buffed it until it looked like�� an antique. I was really happy �� with the results.” University of Technology, Sydney, Australia - Postural steadiness improved Hot Health Systems Ltd. warranty the significantly after 8lovespoon weeks of training and was most significant in those with the most Despite his full-time customized business, diminished postural control. Whole Body Vibration Trainer for 3 (three) David finds time to make a few special spoons for the lady �� years for parts, service and labour within �� who captured his heart. In the palm of his hand nestles a tiny �� a radius of 250 km from the home office of wooden spoon carved from a small ofMedical olive tree. School of piece Rehabilitation, Sciences, Tehran University, Tehran, Iran. - Whole Lethbridge, AB. body vibration training improved proprioception and balance in athletes with reconstructed ACL. wife,” he says. “We “This is the first spoon I carved for my �� had been travelling in Europe and staying with some friends Parts are warranted beyond that distance �� in Italy. The fellow next door was hisGraduate oliveEducation grove* Research, and Canadian Memorial Sportsclearing Sciences Resident, for 3 (three) years with manuals and/or Chiropractic College - Many studies have reported an increase in muscle performance whole-body vibration, but kitchen none have evaluated the possibility of vibration thinning out some trees. I wentafter out with an old knife DVD videos available for self-service of application as therapy for functional restoration after injury. The results of this case imply that vibration therapy has the potential to aid in the management of I know my wife suffers a bit parts whenreplacement. I can’t get away from my and a brick so I could hack offstudy a few pieces of the wood. I acute soft tissue injury and the sequel of disuse and immobilization. workshop carried this piece of wood all �� over Europe. only my ��Using �� while I work my way through an intricate design or �� have an idea I must try out to-----------------------see if it works.” penknife, I carved it into this simple spoon and gave it to my Department of Exercise Physiology, Katholieke Universiteit, Belgium - Knee extensor strength increased significantly after 24 weeks of training. It has the potential to Musing, David adds, “The nicest thing about a lovespoon wife when we got engaged.” induce strength gain to the same extent as resistance training at moderate intensity. We are so confident that you will love is you don’t have to be Welsh or any particular ethnic backNo longer a male-dominated�� craft,�� more�� women are find�� your Vibration Trainer that we are pleased �� You just need money-back a sense of theguarantee romantic to ing this form of carving an absorbing and fascinating art ground to enjoy one. to offer a 15-day Faculty of Health and Welfare, St. Catherine University, Matsuyama, Japan Background: Increased arterial stiffness (hardening of the arteries) is a wellSL treasure your own unique spoon.” form. In his Camosun College-established carving classes, David finds PROVIDED THAT all packaging materials cardiovascular risk factor. WBV mechanically stimulates abdominal and leg arteries and may decrease arterial stiffness. WBV is feasible in vulnerable that women tend to be better than men.humans. “I think women areacutely decreases arterial are retained and the Trainer is returned and immobilized These results suggest that WBV stiffness. in ALL on of its original packaging and in its For more information lovespoons, visit www.davidwestless inhibited in drafting their designs; their artistic minds are �� original condition by means of the original �� freer; they have more patience, so technically they’re better.” ernlovespoons.com or email David at lovespoons@shaw.ca Katholieke Universiteit, Belgium - After 24 weeks vibration training significantly shipper. Money will be returned as soon is David’s book, The Fine Art of Carving Lovespoons Over the past 20 years, David’s Welsh increasedenthusiasm bone mass density of for the hiphis and might be useful in the prevention of osteoporosis. No vibration side effects were observed. This may be an effective way as the Trainer is received by Hot Health to modify for falls and fractures women. available at Bolen Books, Chapters, Munroe Books and Lee lovespoons has never diminished. “I well-recognized love it,”risk hefactors says. “It’s the in older Systems Ltd. �� Valley Tools. one job in my life where I wake�� up and can’t wait to get at it. �� Sports Medicine Laboratory, University of Rome, Italy - Whole-body vibration is a suitable training method to improve knee extension maximal strength, countermovement jump, and flexibility in a young female athlete. Flexibility is important not only for performance but also for the prevention of muscle-tendon injury.

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BYGONE Treasures View of Roatan from Valor

Down at the Corner Store

BY MICHAEL RICE

’m amazed at the store sizes in Victoria’s new shopping centre, remembering, at 14, watching the old one being built that’s now torn down. The employees of one chain outlet now need ropes and grappling hooks to reach some of their stock, and would have to rent Ireland to hold a staff meeting. This, of course, brings me to the subject of the corner store. Near our home in Saanich, there were three small grocers, two of which were side by side – a sort of Norman Rockwell image of a strip mall. Each had food out front, a space out back where the owner lived, and sundry neighbourhood small animals that seemed to roam at will, knocking things over and taking naps on top of the fresh bread display. Candy was a big attraction. Most of the stuff came two or three for a penny, and if I were to find a nickel on the road, I became an instant math whiz, calculating how many I could cram in a bag giving careful thought to smaller and sweeter versus larger and longer lasting. The bins they came in were open to the air, sticky fingers and occasional bugs, so it was possible to take a quick nibble on something (purely for the sake of scientific experiment, you’ll understand) and if it failed to meet the taste test, back it went into the bin. The fun’s gone, as any group of three candies now comes hermetically sealed in a bubble pack that costs $3.98 to buy in the first place and power tools to crack the packaging. Outside the store was the pop machine where you dragged a bottle through a bath of icy water and up through a pair of mechanical jaws that you just knew were preset to shorten the fingers of anyone who tried to fool the machine by dropping electrical box slugs in the coin slot. The best part was that after you drank the pop, you could take it inside and get two cents back for another run at the candy bins! Whatever happened to 2-Way, Stubby, Kik Cola and Mandalay Grape Punch? The empty bottles from these fetch $5 each and just the

bottle caps can bring a dollar or two at collectibles shows. If you have an old Coke vending machine hiding in your basement, blow the dust off, as many models sell for thousands. The food shelves were filled with peanut butter jars, cereal boxes and rows of those Empress Golden Syrup tins that you dunked bread in when no one was looking. I recently bought a peanut butter jar full of coins where the jar was worth more than the coins. Some years ago, there was a magazine called Flake for collectors of cereal boxes. Possibly the title came from what folks called the publisher when he told them he collected cereal boxes. Looking at some recent eBay results, I note that a Kellogg’s Sugar Pops box with cowboy actor Andy Devine on the front sold for $165, while a Quaker Quangaroos box brought more than $200. For these prices, the buyers got empty boxes, as some kid with sticky fingers ate the cereal a long time ago. If you shopped at a Red and White or a United Purity Store, you’ll recall the signs that advertised the week’s specials and what they gave away to encourage you to return. While large chain stores now have little plastic cards that rack up points, way back there were savings stamps awarded based on how much you spent. One dutifully licked the awful tasting gum on the back and plastered them in savings books. Once a couple of books were filled, you could exchange them for a marvellous packet of hairnets! The grocery stores of our childhood with their wooden plank floors and the bell that tinkled over the door won’t come around again, but there are things you can still enjoy. I’m positive that the four food groups are candy, pop, SL bread and syrup.

If you have an old Coke vending machine hiding in your basement, blow the dust off, as many models sell for thousands.

SENIOR LIVING

Comments and suggestions for future columns are welcome and can be sent to Michael Rice PO Box 86 Saanichton BC V8M 2C3 or via email to fenian@shaw.ca

� � � � � � � � ��

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OCTOBER 2010 31 ��

Sister Time

Travel & Adventure

On Salt Spring

“P

inch on a monkey tree,” I chant, while gently tweaking my sister’s arm. This kid-like prank immediately conjures up warm and fuzzy memories. It also reminds me of the saying, “when you have a sister, you have a piece of your childhood.” We see the prickly Monkey Puzzle tree when we’re parked in the ferry lineup at Crofton; a quaint community nestled in Osborne Bay on Vancouver Island. And over the next two days, while on Salt Spring Island, we escape our citified pace, and rejuvenate our inner child. The Pajama Party at Hastings House provides us with the perfect opportunity. Eiderdown duvets, soaker tubs, and private fireside dining – what more could two ladies on the loose ask for? Top it off with a massage, infused with the essence of lemon grass and you’ll find two silky-smooth sisters who smell better than mom’s meringuetopped pie. The 22-acre property overlooks scenic Ganges Harbour, and taking centre stage is a Sussex-style manor, built in 1939 by the founder, Warren Hastings. “It was fashioned after his family’s 11th century home in England,” the resident manager, explains. “The hinges for the doors and windows were made by a local blacksmith,” she informs, “the fireplace stone was quarried from the surrounding land, and planks that line the floors were secured together 32

SENIOR LIVING

STORY AND PHOTOS BY JANE CASSIE

with black boat nails.” We enter the living room, where burnished fir gleams beneath scattered Persian carpets. Just beyond, is an upscale dining room that has magnetic powers every mealtime. Although we both qualify as true-blue foodies, the last things we need are extra Rubenesque pounds on our aging rumps. You’d think with so many activities at our fingertips, there’d be no need to worry. We could cycle sun-dappled roads that bisect pastoral meadows, paddle rugged shorelines to check out tearyeyed seals or dive beneath the deep. As well as being B.C.’s most southern Gulf Island, Salt Spring is a sprawling 29 kilometres in length, and is chock full of adventurous options. Hordes of hikers and picnickers are lured every year to the summit of Mount Maxwell, also known as Baynes Peak. While en route, they’re canopied by old growth Douglas fir and often share the trail with blacktailed deer and feral sheep. Once they reach the island’s pinnacle, the rewards are panoramic – the vista encompasses everything from Vancouver Island to the Mainland. But instead of putting our well-padded duffs into action, we rev up our comfy sedan. Even though the walk from Hastings House to Ganges town centre is a breeze, we don’t want to miss a moment. It’s market day, and the heart of Centennial Park is pulsating!

Every Saturday morning, from April to October, over 100 artisans and farmers congregate to sell their goods. Tables, shaded by colourful umbrellas, border the parkway and host everything from bead work to bok choy. We sample sensuously sweet fudge, savour locally made goat cheese, and get personally pampered with a lavender scrub. “All you have to do is rub and rinse,” we’re told by the Soap Works owner, as he massages the heady granules onto one of my sister’s hands. The instant transformation is quite miraculous, as her dry scaly limb turns satin. My sister quickly purchases a packet of the product – I’m sure, with the intention of scrubbing more than just her other hand. The string of bargains and vendor stalls carry on after we leave the marketplace. Roadside stands dot the hillsides on our island drive and brim over with everything from bright floral bouquets to the garden’s daily pick. Most are unstaffed, and are operated by a trustworthy

��

�� Truly caring and professional service at a time of need or when preplanning

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honour system. What a refreshing change from our commercialized big box stores! While cruising along the country roads that are fringed by farmlands, we giggle and gab and discuss everything from people to politics. We stop to check out schooners that bob in Burgoyne Bay and retrace the steps of time while peering into St. Paul’s Church. This place of worship was constructed out of salvaged material; shipped from Vancouver by Aboriginal war canoes, back in 1885. The 1906 Ruckle farmhouse is another heritage site that we happen upon, and just beyond is a park bench that overlooks Swanson Channel. From this ringside seat, we enjoy an awesome Salt Spring show. It’s not a film that’s staged or rehearsed, nor a play that uses any props. But it does feature a cast of first-rate performers. Long-legged herons and sun-basking cormorants poise stoically on the

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Page 32, The author (right) and her sister Katherine Surridge Page 33, Sisters ride the ferry to Salt Spring Island. Below, top, Katherine shopping at the open-air market. Below, bottom, The sisters enjoy a peaceful moment.

craggy shore. Excited gulls squawk overhead, and then dive-bomb toward their prey. And two curious seal pups pop up from the deep to take a big bow. But the height of excitement comes when the first signature dorsal fin slices through the sun-glinted waves. It’s followed by another, and then another. And directly within our view, the orcas crest above the water’s surface, then dip beneath, and all with divine synchronicity. The splendour activates my digital camera. It creates a sense of awe.

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SENIOR LIVING

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And as we relax in silence side by side, in the comfort of each other’s company, I reflect on the great weekend we’ve had together and another familiar saying comes to mind. “Although we were born sisters, we’ve grown up to SL be friends.” BC Ferries 1-888-BC FERRY (1-888-223-3779) from anywhere in North America or from your cellphone on Rogers or Telus Mobility Networks dial *BCF (*223). Online, visit www.bcferries.com

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Health & Wellness

Passion, Purpose and Meaning: A Stroke Survivor’s Journey

BY CAROL SHEEHAN

Photo: John W. Heintz

SENIOR LIVING

s a survivor of an ischemic stroke, Patricia Pitcher found a passion for writing, a purpose in sharing her experience of “stroking” and new meaning in a life restored to mental, physical and spiritual health. An aneurysm blocked her vertebral artery and caused an ischemic event – an interruption of blood supply to her brain. Fortunately, the aneurysm did not completely rupture and, against steep odds, Pat survived. Her body, however, was badly damaged. After leaving intensive care, Pat still suffered limited mobility, extreme pain in her neck and a body that refused to connect with her brain’s signals to make even the simplest movements. Her book, Beyond Stroke: A Journey of Hope, not only chronicles the events around her stroke and recovery, it was, remarkably, the very instrument that focused her efforts to heal her brain and body. Writing is a singular activity that requires not only time and concentration, but also courage. Penning a book is difficult for even the most experienced writer. In Pat’s case, she was only home for a week from the hospital, learning all over again how to speak, walk and think, when her well-intentioned, determined mentor told her to write a book.

“I have my very own Dr. Phil,” she smiles, “Dr. Phil Winkelmans. He provided the challenge that restored me to health.” Dr. Winkelmans’ challenge surprised Pat: “Everything that happened to you up until today is about the first chapter of your life. And now that chapter is over, finished, kaput. From this day forth, and for the next 20 or 30 years, your life is about your next chapter. How do you want it to read?” “From the beginning,” she says, “Dr. Phil never called it anything but ‘a book.’ It wasn’t a ‘journal’ or a ‘diary’, but simply ‘a book.’ At the time, I thought he must be crazy. “I could barely hold a pencil. I signed my name with an X and still had blurred vision. Even after intensive rehabilitation, the stroke left me with extreme fatigue, a heavy feeling in half my body, no lid reflex in my right eye, and no hearing in my right ear. “Dr. Phil just announced on his first visit that he wanted me to write a chapter outline by the following week, and that he’d follow up every week with a visit to push the assignment forward. I was astonished, doubtful – and then determined to do it.”

“From this day forth, and for the next 20 or 30 years, your life is about your next chapter. How do you want it to read?”

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Dr. Winkelmans (author of The Art of Purposeful Being: Your Destiny Project) was aware of developments in neural sciences regarding brain damage. He believed new neural pathways could be created in Pat’s injured brain. The book would require focus, and refocusing; it would involve a repetitive constellation of activities that would build new neural pathways in Pat’s brain and promote her healing. What better way, he reasoned, for this seasoned RN, who had the educational background, training and experience of taking care of stroke survivors – and who had herself recently suffered and survived a massive stroke – to offer both educational and experiential perspective to others. Pat rose to the challenge. She knew through retraining her brain, she could make physical and mental advances. She also realized, contrary to her previous training, not all stroke survivors suffered depression, and her attitude remained optimistic about her chances for recovery. With generous help from others on her personal health “team,” she kept positive as she sought to regain the neces-

OCTOBER 2010

Health & Wellness sary mobility and strength to restore many of the abilities and skills that had been stricken from her life in one catastrophic moment. Trying to focus a tired and foggy brain to work with a damaged and easily fatigued physical body required hard work and repetitive exercises. Through a certain amount of pushing herself and being pushed by her many caregivers, Pat made progress. “The book was a burden and I really didn’t want to do it at first,” she says. “It seemed impossible. I needed lined paper to write, like a school kid, and a board that would sit on my lap as I reclined in a chair. At first, it was a minute-tominute slog, not an hour-to-hour or even day-to-day effort. “My body felt so heavy all the time and I was always tired. I threw away a ton of paper. But, something, I’m not sure what, propelled me on. I kept practising moving a pencil, putting together letters, then words, forming longer sentences – pushing my brain to operate even though I felt like I was thinking in a thick fog. My lucid pathways were short at first, but they got longer. I wanted to push the envelope. Dr. Phil continued to guide me and urge me forward every

“I knew I had to be at peace and accept that what had happened to me was now a part of me.” time I thought I’d reached my limits. Every week, he zeroed in on my feelings. The book work became mental, emotional and physical therapy.” Eventually, with dogged determination and a toughminded approach, Pat kept writing, and kept improving as she continued her fight for personal mountaintops. And they came. Some came with perseverance: rehabilitation at the gym for physical and occupational therapy, establishing new nutritional habits, learning again to read and write, to use a computer, even to drive a car. Some came with medical interventions: surgeries to correct her eyelid droop and hearing loss, new vitamin and mineral supplement regimens, and chelation therapy to remove heavy metals from her body. She is quick to acknowledge that most mountaintops were achieved through the help and assistance of many understanding friends. More than any single factor, Pat’s recovery journey has been characterized by an attitude of acceptance. “After the stroke, my mind, body and spirit changed,” she says. “I knew that who I was before the stroke I would never be again. So, I got on with life. I knew if I pushed 38

SENIOR LIVING

aside the stroke or ignored it, I wasn’t going to win. I knew I had to fight to regain an independent life, but more importantly, I knew I had to be at peace and accept that what had happened to me was now a part of me.” Acceptance, too, came from her caregivers. “They never once referred to my deficits; they treated me like a person and looked after me with a positive attitude. They accepted me wherever I was from week to week.” Her caregivers brought encouragement to attempt what, at times, seemed impossible, celebration for each achievement, and a willingness to push when necessary. They stood alongside her as she strove to overcome the next roadblock. Pat accepted her own new limits. “I learned to stay in the present, accept that stress is something to be avoided, and not to invite irritants into my life. When a nursing colleague admonished me to get plenty of sleep and rest, she gave me permission not to feel guilty about taking care of myself.” In her book, Pat offers hope from a deep reservoir of experience. Rather than being a “victim” of stroke – a phrase she rejects – she offers stroke survivors, and their caregivers, insights into recovery. To avoid the risk for stroke, she maintains that people should keep stress, blood pressure and cholesterol levels down, refrain from smoking, keep fit, exercise regularly, attend to good nutrition and have a relationship with someone they trust. And she credits her advocate with her own recovery. Now, as she moves forward in the next season of her life, she finds new meanings. She addresses audiences about stroke and recovery, shares her experiences with other survivors and helps doctors, nurses, therapists, families, spouses and other caregivers learn more about what it means to survive a stroke and how they can help. Today, Pat lives one-day-at-a-time, enjoying an active physical, spiritual and intellectual life to the fullest as she finds joy in sharing her story, appreciating her family and friends, and living life to the fullest. SL Beyond Stroke: A Journey of Hope is available from Mulberry Books in Qualicum and Parksville, at some health food stores, Nanaimo Hospital Gift Shop and from the author at pattip10@gmail.com.

Young, From the Back BY CAROLE BLAKE

got a weird compliment the other day. I was playing tennis in my Tennis League, where I don’t know most of the women, and my doubles partner for the day said to me, “You know, you really look very young, (pause), from the back! My problem was: do I thank her, or do I smack her? Compliments like that I can do without! Another one happened on a different tennis court, this time in 90-degree weather. After just winning a tough match, my partner and I were sweating, exhausted and thrilled. When we went to shake hands with our opponents, one of them said, “You girls were so lucky! I was really off today!” Does that mean that all those good shots we made would have meant nothing if she were on? Give me a break! Here’s another: I was meeting a good friend, and a couple of minutes after we said our hellos, she said, “You know, you are much too skinny!” Well, I happen to be thin, but I eat plenty. I imagine it has something to do with my metabolism. I then asked her, “If you thought I was heavy, would you say, ‘you are much too fat?’” She had to admit that she would not. I decided to check it out with my Webster’s Dictionary, and here’s what I found under “compliment”: 1) an expression of praise, admiration or congratulation. 2) a formal act of civility, courtesy or respect. And then it defined “backhanded compliment” as an oblique or roundabout compliment (Could it also be called backhanded because it happened to me so often on the tennis court? Nah!). I even looked up “white lie,” which they describe as “a trivial, harmless or well-intentioned untruth.” There’s an old expression that goes, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all.” Anyway, the point is, if you’re going to compliment someone, make it a good one! And so, my friends, if you happen to see me enter the room backwards, you’ll underSL stand. It’s my best look!

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TO ORDER a copy... Please mail a cheque for $5.25 ($5 plus GST), along with your name, phone number and address, to Senior Living, 153, 1581-H Hillside Ave., Victoria BC V8T 2C1. We will mail you a copy of this resourceful housing guide upon receipt of payment. OCTOBER 2010

t s a P s ’ a i r o t c Vi Revisited ...continued from the September issue.

n spite of their 30-year difference in age, Alma Pakenham and Francis Rattenbury were well-suited. Both believed their celebrity status gave them the right to flaunt public morality. Both craved the limelight. Both felt they were possessed by genius and woebetide anyone who failed to recognize it. Francis doted on the new love in his life and looked upon his sick and dowdy wife of 30 years, Florrie, as an encumbrance that should be hastily dispatched. But it was not as easy as he thought. In desperation, he ordered a moving company to clear their Oak Bay House of all her furniture. But Florrie was not to be deterred. As the furniture was carried out the front door, Florrie and her Chinese servant promptly carried it all back through a side door. Cruel harassment followed, Florrie eventually surrendered and the couple divorced in 1925. But public sympathy was now with Florrie and the woman whom society had shunned for so many years was seen as the unfortunate victim. In turn, Francis, hitherto the darling of Victoria’s elite, was ostracized. Francis and Alma were married quietly in Bellingham, Washington, but were shunned by Victoria society. There were

THE MURDER

no more recitals for Alma or contracts for Francis. He may have been the genius behind the Legislative Buildings, the Empress Hotel and some 40 other significant structures throughout the city, but people had grown tired of his bad behaviour. Their only son, John, was born on December 27, 1928, and society didn’t care. Rumours began to spread that Alma was a cocaine addict, a consequence of her service in a field hospital during World War One. People were convinced that Alma had entrapped Francis into the same dependency. This, said the public, explained his increasingly erratic and cantankerous behaviour. Francis changed his will. Frank and Mary, his first two children, were cut out and everything was left to his new wife, her son Christopher and their baby John. Ironically, the only person to wave them goodbye as they sailed away from Victoria was his club-footed son, Frank. The family’s return to England in 1929 did little to improve their fortunes. Alma would have preferred the bright lights of London to the sedate seaside town of Bournemouth, but Francis liked it because it reminded him of Victoria. When anticipated contracts did not roll in, Francis retreated into an alcohol-soaked gloom and the effervescent Alma sought greener pastures. Under the pseudonym, “Lozanne,”

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she published sentimental ballads recorded by the celebrated English tenor, Frank Titterton, with Alma on piano. Since Francis no longer showed any interest in her, Alma developed a warm relationship with Irene Riggs who soon became her companion and loyal confidant. To complete her intimate circle, she hired the services of a short, stocky, bowlegged youth named George Percy Stoner as her chauffeur. George had grown up as a solitary, friendless child and his grandmother described him as being “very, very backward.” Nevertheless, this shy, gullible 17year-old was soon permanently housed in the guest bedroom and became Alma’s lover-in-residence. But the slow-witted George became so infatuated with Alma that any attention, however small, that Francis showed his wife, drove the simple-minded young man to distraction. On that fateful Sunday, March 24, 1935, Alma had tried to comfort the agitated George, assured him of her undying love and declared she had no longer any interest in her husband. George seemed to calm down and left to visit his grandmother. Alma and Francis played cards until 9:30 p.m., when she went upstairs to pack for a visit they planned to make the next day to Bridport. Later that evening, Stoner crept into

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SENIOR LIVING

The Tale of Alma Rattenbury Part II BY NORMAN K. ARCHER

Alma’s room and joined her in bed. A loud groan from below sent Alma flying downstairs to find her husband lying in a pool of blood, his skull smashed. She gulped the whisky from the glass that Francis had been holding, replaced the dentures that had flown from his mouth, then, realized the foolishness of her actions and screamed for Irene. With Stoner’s help, the three of them carried the unconscious man to his bed and Stoner was sent to fetch the doctor. Alma continued to drink steadily. Dr. O’Donnell arrived about midnight, realized the seriousness of his patient’s condition, and sent for a surgeon, Dr. Rooke. The doctors thought Francis must have fallen, but Alma’s incoherent statements that someone must have attacked him aroused their suspicions of foul play. Sensing her danger, Alma then tried lamely to say Francis must have tried to commit suicide but the nature of the wounds made such a suggestion ludicrous. Rooke had no doubt that the three blows to the head indicated attempted murder, and the police were called. Alma continued drinking and made a series of contradictory statements to the police – first, she said a burglar must have come in through the open French doors, then she confessed that she did it, then that Stoner did it, then

in desperation she tried to bribe the police to keep quiet about it! To compound the bizarre nature of the incident, she put on a recording of one of her love songs, which inspired her to try another tactic – to attempt to seduce the constable with her feminine charms. Dr. O’Donnell, who had accompanied Rattenbury to the hospital, returned to what had all the appearances of a madhouse. He found the intoxicated Alma, staggering from one policeman to the next, flinging her arms around them and cooing to them over the noise of the record blaring at full volume, and with Stoner, in his pyjamas blissfully sleeping in the car outside. Suddenly, Alma had another inspiration – “I know who did it! It was his son!” Then she realized the son was still in Canada. The next morning, Stoner denied all knowledge of the attack, a now sober Alma confessed and was arrested for attempted murder and taken to London to face trial. But Irene Riggs was not convinced and finally elicited the truth from Stoner – in a fit of jealous rage, he had bludgeoned the dozing Rattenbury with a heavy wooden mallet he had borrowed from his grandmother earlier that day. Irene said nothing at the time. Alma wrote to Stoner to ask him to visit her. When Irene was informed that Rattenbury had died, she told the police

what she knew. Stoner was arrested for murder as he stepped off the train in London. “I understand,” was his simple reply to the charge. Alma’s testimony before the Court was a masterpiece, calculated to win sympathy and impress the jury. Her blithe innocence of expression, her low, steady voice - even the evident absurdities and contradictions in her statements all convinced the jury that she had neither the wit nor the temperament to commit murder. She was released. Stoner’s confused testimony, on the other hand, resulted in a quick and decisive guilty verdict. It may have been remorse or self-pity or perhaps a desire that she would ring down the curtain with a dramatic flourish that prompted her to commit suicide by the River Avon with a knife thrust through the heart, but whatever the motive, it drew a crowd of over 3,000 to her funeral. The whole affair was a bonanza for the national press and the woman who craved publicity all her life had more than her fair SL share of it at her death. Norman Archer is an historical city tour guide in Victoria and the author of Tales of Old Victoria. Contact him at 250-6551594 or nka@canada.com

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Free In-Home Estimate

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� �� OCTOBER 2010

CLASSIFIEDS SAANICH VOLUNTEER SERVICES hopes you’ll consider volunteering this fall – drive, visit, garden, home repairs and more. Call 250-595-8008 for info. SENIOR CONCIERGE SERVICES Marvelous companionship with personalized services. Grocery shoppping, errands, and memorable outings. Call Agnes Campbell 250-588-5509. www.catch-the-moments.com COLLECTOR SEEKING vintage/collectable cameras, binoculars and microscopes. Nikon, Leica, Contax, Rolleiﬂex, Zeiss, Canon, etc. Mike 250-3836456 or e-mail: msymons6456@telus.net COMPUTER ASSISTANCE: I provide computer assistance with a focus on training, troubleshooting and improving computer performance. Contact Sandy in Victoria at: 778-433-5049 or sanhealy@shaw.ca.

RUTH M.P HAIRSTYLING for Seniors in Greater Victoria. In the convenience of your own home! Certiﬁed Hairdresser. Call - 250-893-7082.

HOME AGAIN SENIORS TRANSITION SERVICES: Downsize and move with ease. We offer a caring hand. Call (250)984-4044 or visit www.seniorshomeagain.ca

MUSIC LESSONS at the Peninsula Academy of Music Arts, 1662 Mills Road, North Saanich 778-426-1800. All instruments. www.PeninsulaAcademy.ca

PROFESSIONAL, RELIABLE, EFFICIENT HOUSE CLEANER Victoria & Surrounding area. $18/hour. Can use eco-friendly products. Please call Nicole 250-686-0603.

WRITTEN A BOOK? Aldridge Street Editing can get your manuscript print-ready. Transcription - Editing Cover Design - Book Layout. www.aldridgestreet.com Call 250-595-2376.

SEMI-WATERFRONT SELF-CONTAINTED CONDOMINIUM. Quaint town north of Puerto Vallarta. Beautiful pool and garden. Short / Long term. 250-756-0437 or 250-758-5995.

COMPUTER BASICS INYOUR HOME. Patient senior computer lady to show you e-mail, surﬁng. Hourly fee. Connect with your world. 250-516-5980.

WANTED: OLD POSTCARDS, stamp accumulations, and pre-1950 stamped envelopes. Also buying old coins, medals and badges. Please call Michael 250-652-9412 or email fenian@shaw.ca

MOBILE FOOT CARE NURSE home visits in greater Nanaimo, Cedar to Parksville. John Patterson LPN, qualiﬁed nursing foot care for toenails, corns and calluses. 250-390-9266.

THE BETTER BUSINESS BUREAU of Vancouver Island is located at 220-1175 Cook St., Victoria BC V8V 4A1. Toll-free phone line for Up-Island 1-877-826-4222 (South Island dial 250-386-6348). www.bbbvanisland.org E-mail: info@bbbvanisland.org

DRIVING MISS DAISY® Why be lazy? Become our Daisy! You won’t be sorry to see autumn’s glory. 250-588-4638 (Victoria) 250-507-2336 (Sidney) GOLDEN GROVE CARE FACILITY, newest, most personable facility with 24hr care in Willow Point, Campbell River for single or married couples,also offering respite accomodations. Please call 250-923-7049.

HOME INSTEAD SENIOR CARE - Ask us about our new concierge services. We provide a little assistance when you need it. Do you need meal preparation, light housekeeping, laundry, shopping, appointments, or respite? We are also hiring seniors. Call 250-382-6565.

FOOT CARE IN YOUR HOME Victoria Region By Marcia Goodwin R.N.,B.Sc.N. Foot Care Specialist / Foot Nurse. Call (778) 426-0387.

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PERSONALS: LADY, 74 (straight). Seeking lady to share 2 bedroom condo January (South). Also meet for luncheons Victoria & Duncan. 250-715-3744.

CLASSIFIED ADVERTISING $30 for 20 words or less. $1.25 per extra word. BW only. Boxed Ad - Small (2.2 x 1.2) $110. Boxed Ad - Large (2.2 x 2.4) $210. Add BW Logo - $25. Red spot color 10% extra. Plus tax. All Classiﬁed ads must be paid at time of booking. Cheque / Credit Card accepted. Ph. (250)479-4705 or toll-free 1-877-479-4705. Deadline: 15th of the month. Make cheque payable to: Senior Living,153,1581-H HillsideAve., Victoria BC V8T 2C1

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BY GOLDIE CARLOW, M.ED

Dear R.G.: I am sorry you are being subjected to this behaviour after the loss of your husband. Your friends probably mean well, but are just not realistic about the situation. Death is never easy but, in your husband’s case, they must have been aware of his pain and of your acceptance of the impending loss. Perhaps the easiest way to stop their actions is to speak to your friends in a group explaining that his death was a relief to his suffering and to your constant care. Sometimes, situations like this have to be discussed openly for full comprehension. I hope this will relieve your problem and allow you to move on.

Dear W.J.: Well, you are fortunate to have such a good companion. No doubt, you and your dog have missed your husband greatly. However, you are still in good health, so your daily life does not have to change too much when you move. Animals do adjust to apartment living as long as they continue to have exercise. You seem to be active still and can continue daily walks with her. The exercise and fresh air is SL beneficial to both of you. SENIOR PEER COUNSELLING CENTRES Victoria 250-382-4331 Duncan 250-748-2133 Nanaimo 250-754-3331 Sidney 250-656-5537 Courtenay/Comox 250-334-9917 Salt Spring Island 250-537-4607 Port Hardy 250-949-5110

Goldie Carlow is a retired registered nurse, clinical counsellor and senior peer counselling trainer.

“One Call Does it All” ��

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Delaney Relocation Services

�� Anne Delaney, CSA ��

� ��

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Dear Goldie: You will probably think I am a silly old lady fretting about my pet. I wish it were that simple. Several years ago, our children gave us a wonderful dog, a small black and white mixed breed. She has been a great companion and loved her daily walks with us. Unfortunately, my husband passed away last year and both the dog and I miss him terribly. However, we still get out for our walks and keep each other company.

new home. I am in my 70s, but I am in good health and keep very active. Your advice will be most appreciated. –W.J.

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Dear Goldie: My husband passed away three months ago after a long illness. He had suffered so long we both felt relief that he was leaving. While we could accept his death, it seems that some of our friends cannot. They continue to grieve openly and are forever offering condolences. Can you suggest anything to stop this? –R.G.

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Photo: Jason van der Valk

ASK Goldie

My problem is that I am now selling my house and plan to go into an apartment in town. The dog has been used to a big garden to play in here, and I’m not sure if she will be happy being shut in so much in my

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�� OCTOBER 2010

Community

Signed by a Souper President

n the second and fourth Friday every month, a group of 12 Victoria women gather to play bridge and catch up on stories. In 2006, one such story came from Liz Beatty whose son Marvin Nicholson was asked by a man named Barack Obama to assist him in running as a Democratic candidate in the presidential election. Lorna Elder, another bridge player, facetiously said, “When Barack Obama becomes president, we should play bridge in the White House!” In 2009, history was made when Barack Obama was sworn in as the 45th president of the United States. In addition to his friendship with the new president, Marv became co-ordinator of the minute-by-minute movements of Air Force One. And with that, Lorna’s tongue-in-cheek comment was sud-

denly on its way to becoming a reality. In April this year, the bridge club members boarded a plane for Washington, D.C. Tucked in Lorna’s luggage was a waterproof pen and an apron complete with the Souper Bowls of Hope logo. The women received a warm welcome from Marv Nicholson and the apron was given to him to be taken to the president for his signature. As the awestruck Canadians ascended the steps of the White House, Secretary of State Hilary Clinton greeted them. Marv introduced them to President Obama’s staff, including Reggie Love, the president’s personal bodyguard. After a tour of the White House, including the East Wing (Michelle’s side), the women were thrilled to see the president as he boarded Air Force One, and waved at them before his departure.

“When Barack Obama becomes president, we should play bridge in the White House!”

Souper Bowls of Hope is an annual local fundraiser that supports the Victoria Youth Empowerment Society (YES). YES provides many services including emergency shelter, health care, education and training to some of the most vulnerable people in the city – underprivileged and at-risk youth. On October 14, local celebrities will be ladling soup at the Fairmont Empress Hotel from 11 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. Tickets are $25 and those attending will choose a handcrafted bowl made by South Vancouver Island Potters Guild members and by school students and take the bowl home! In addition, there will be auction items – including the apron signed by President Barack Obama (pictured above). Tickets can be purchased at The Bay Centre’s Guest Services, Ivy’s Book Shop on Oak Bay Avenue, Tanner’s Books on Beacon Avenue, by calling 250-383-3514 or at SL the door. For more information, visit www.souperbowls.com

SENIOR LIVING

Photo: Prepared by the University of Victoria and Prestige Framers

Souper Bowls of Hope

Only by special invitation (one day in April and one day in October), visitors can view the expansive White House gardens, where commemorative plantings represent each president while in office. They even met Bo, the presidential dog! With all the sightseeing, shopping and touring the nooks and crannies of the White House, the women still had time SL to play bridge!

One gift. Unlimited possibilities. Imagine the seed a conversation can plant. New ways of fighting disease. A work of art that moves generations. A business that creates thousands of jobs. And the University of Victoria students behind these achievements will have you to thank for making it possible. Your gift. Your legacy. A planned gift to UVic can blossom into anything. Contact Natasha to start the conversation about creating a lasting legacy in your will or estate plan.

The Bridge Players (left to right): Betty Ann Aigers, Wendy Sullivan, Sheila Osborne, René Hallott, Liz Beattie, Connie Carter, Peggy Pitﬁeld, Lorna Elder and Lynda Strong in the Gold Room at the White House, Washington D.C.

Natasha Benn | 250-721-6001 | nbenn@uvic.ca

�� OCTOBER 2010

SCAM ALERT BY ROSALIND SCOTT

Seniors Targeted by High-Pressure Sales

he Better Business Bureau has received numerous complaints recently regarding unscrupulous salespeople targeting seniors and using high-pressure door-to-door sales tactics. Consumers are alleging that travelling alarm sales reps, claiming to be affiliated with a well-known security systems company, have been using aggressive sales tactics and deceptive practices to bully them into purchasing a new, overpriced alarm system and signing a longterm contract. According to the RCMP, consumers are being offered time-sensitive deals and promises that their security system will be linked directly to local RCMP and ambulance services, which is not possible in British Columbia. It is not the first time BBB has received reports on this issue. Similar

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46 46

SENIOR LIVING LIVING SENIOR

complaints were received during the summer of 2009 from people in communities across the province. This time, however, seniors (particularly women) appear to be the main targets. BBB advises consumers to use due diligence prior to making any decisions on home security systems: Be aware of pressure sales tactics: Some unscrupulous door-to-door sellers will put pressure on you to close the deal at that moment, and even make special offers to entice you. Listen to their tone. Are they increasing in volume as they speak to you? Are they ignoring you despite saying you are not interested? Find a way to end the conversation quickly to avoid long, drawnout pressure sales pitches. Stand strong: Do not invite unsolicited salespeople into your home. If you do allow a salesperson inside and decide during the presentation that you are not interested in making a purchase, simply ask him or her to leave. If the salesperson refuses to leave, threaten to call the police, and follow through if they don’t leave immediately. Verify the individual: If you are interested in buying from a door-to-door seller, get everything in writing including price, warranty and all conditions. Tell the salesperson you will check it

out and get back to him or her. Ask for a business card and contact information. Look the company up yourself and check to verify this person is an employee. Also, take the time to check out the company’s BBB Reliability Report at vi.bbb.org Ask for their license: The B.C. Ministry of Public Safety and Solicitor General licenses security systems sellers. Sellers are required to provide proof to you that they are licensed. Know your rights: Door-to-door salespeople are required to provide customers with a “Buyer’s Remorse Period.” During this specified number of days, clients can change their minds and cancel a contract at no additional cost. In most circumstances, you will need to provide a written request to cancel the contract. To find out more about your rights as a consumer visit the Consumer Protection BC website at consumerprotectionbc.ca For more information on scams and consumer tips visit vi.bbb.org SL If you believe you have been the target of a scam, call the Better Business Bureau Vancouver Island at 250-386-6348 in Greater Victoria or at 1-877-826-4222 elsewhere on the Island, so others can beneﬁt from your experience. E-mail info@vi.bbb.org

AUTUMN

hen I was a child, my mother spent most of summer and early autumn preserving the fruits of the harvest. All of the jars of fruit and vegetables were stored in the cool room in the basement. During winter months, when we went into the room to get something for a meal and the light was turned on, the shelves gleamed with the gem-like colours of raspberries, peaches and beans; the colours of summer to lighten the darkest days of winter. To those of you who still do this, I salute you and give thanks for you.

BY PAT NICHOL

Photo: Frances Litman

Courageous

away for those dark days when you need gems to brighten your life. Determine what ideas, thoughts and sadness can be plowed back into the soil to fertilize the future. Hopefully, these lessons help you grow. As we move through this tunnel, this time of transition, each of us will have a different story. If October could tell a story, what kind of story would it tell – gratitude and gathering or bitterness?

...the shelves gleamed with gem-like colours...

October starts the final quarter of the year. The autumn equinox is a time of harvest and gathering. In most of our lives today, this no longer has the same meaning as it might have in past years. This is a time of transition, a tunnel from the light of summer to the dark of winter: a sense of moving from youth to maturity. As you move through this tunnel, think about what gems you can carry with you to lighten up the darkness of winter nights. What ideas, thoughts, plans do you have this harvest season? Reflect on those accomplishments achieved during this past year and decide what can be saved and stored

When you gather around the table this Thanksgiving, ask your friends and family this question, “What is your October story?” Happy Thanksgiving all! SL Pat Nichol is a speaker and published author. www.patnichol.com

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Live Safely and Independently in Your Own Home www.bclifeline.com

Contact the program nearest you: Victoria Lifeline • 1-888-832-6073 Eldersafe Support Services • 1-866-457-8987 South Vancouver Island and Ladysmith Nanaimo Lifeline Program • 250-739-5770 or 250-947-8213 Mid Island, Cassidy to Bowser Comox Valley Lifeline Society • 1-866-205-6160 North Island, Cowichan Valley and Chemainus/Crofton

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Next Month in Senior Living...

Planned Giving Private citizens’ contributions (time and money) are keeping the doors of many charities open, and ensuring important causes continue to move forward. OCTOBER 2010

ReﬂTHEN ections & NOW

very car I have ever owned or seen has always had a glovebox, often called a “glove compartment.” And yet, I’ve never put a pair of gloves in any one of them. Its original intent, I am sure, was to supply a place for driving gloves, often used in the beginning of the 20th century. However, I think a name change is in order! I don’t know what to change it to, but I believe a change is imperative. I am always nervous of the glovebox (for lack of a better name) in my car. It is a mysterious place, best kept at a distance. Every two years or so, I gather up the courage to go through it, inspect it, even clean it, and each time I shake with trepidation. And I am amazed at some of the contents. I once found an apple core – snuck in there, I guess, by one of my kids. It had become fossilized (I was tempted to have it bronzed). There was an old stick of gum that disintegrated as I unwrapped it; three screws, one washer, a ballpoint pen without a point, a neatly folded candy wrapper, four books of matches, two receipts with faded dates, an unravelled eight-track tape,

a lint-covered Life Saver and a broken pencil. There were other odds and ends as well, but they were just junk. And not one pair of gloves! Cars once had running boards but the automakers realized their folly, when it was pointed out that you couldn’t run on them; you could only stand on them, so they stopped putting them on cars. But the glovebox is still there, taunting people to discover its hidden treasures. We misname many things. There is no egg in eggplant, no pine or apple in pineapple. Quicksand takes one down slowly and boxing rings are square. People recite in a play, but play at a recital. We park in driveways and drive on parkways. We say a house is burning up when it is actually burning down. We fill in a form by filling it out. When stars are out they are visible, when lights are out they are invisible. Rush hour is when most traffic is at a standstill. Running shoes are worn by many who don’t run and loafers worn by many who don’t loaf. And then, of

“Reﬂections” MAIL-IN ORDER FORM Reﬂections, Rejections, and Other Breakfast Foods Name_____________________________________ by Gipp Forster A collection of Gipp’s humorous and nostalgic columns. A wonderful read for Reflections, �� yourself, and a and Other Breakfast Foods thoughtful gift for friends and family members.

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Photo: Krystle Wiseman

THE GLOVEBOX

BY GIPP FORSTER

course, there’s the glovebox. I’ve met some people who keep their glovebox immaculately clean with just their car registration resting comfortably there. I try to stay away from such people: they frighten me. The automobile has come a long, long, long way since Henry Ford’s Model-T. They are so sophisticated now that you almost have to be a rocket scientist to figure them out: computer this and computer that. Some even talk. They make me so nervous with all their bells and whistles that I feel like I should carry a gun to protect myself. But then again, the cars might shoot back. They might have their own gun hidden in the glovebox! Surely, with all of man’s ingenuity, the space the glovebox takes up in a car could be exchanged for something else like a Pez dispenser, a miniature piano or a pop machine. But if the auto manufacturer is going to insist on still putting a glovebox in 21st century cars, let us at least demand that each car comes equipped SL with a new pair of gloves!

�� Senior Living Housing Directory is a valuable online resource for seniors and family members looking for alternative housing to match their desired lifestyle, or medical/mobility needs. Over 500 senior residences and housing communities throughout BC are listed in this comprehensive directory. Compare services, amenities, and prices. Sort your selection by region, or type of care. This directory is published by Senior Living, a monthly magazine distributed to approximately 850 locations across BC.

�� Coming soon: residential listings for Alberta and Saskatchewan.

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Senior Living’s online searchable senior housing directory is a perfect complement to its semi-annual senior housing special editions in February and August. Senior Living also publishes a 128 page book called “To Move or Not to Move? A Helpful Guide for Seniors Considering Their Residential Options.” We have sold over 3,000 copies of this book. No other magazine we know of has such a comprehensive, interconnected group of housing resources. For more information about any of these products or services, call (250)479-4705 or toll-free 1-877-479-4705. Or email ofﬁce@seniorlivingmag.com

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Live a healthy and active lifestyle with us! ACTIVE LIFESTYLE COMMUNITY

Origin at Longwood is an Active Lifestyle Community in Nanaimo. Choose from full-service rental retirement and assisted living suites. Select the option that best suits your lifestyle. Move in to Origin at Longwood & pick a value reward thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s right for you! *Visit our community to preview our available move-in offers.

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