12 minute read
Noteworthy
This informal portrait, taken by Philippe Cheng for the Spring 1998 issue of Barnard Magazine, shows Aimee Sims ’98 playing guitar.
COURTESY OF THE BARNARD COLLEGE ARCHIVES
34 Millie’s Summer
Reading List 37 AABC Pages 38 Class Notes 47 Virtual Roundup 57 Alumna Profile:
Susan A. Cole ’62 66 Parenting: School’s Out:
What Next?
Connecting alumnae. Celebrating community.
Millie’s Reading List
Millie’s Summer Reading List
Alumnae-created works to help you learn, reflect, and escape this season
Launched in March 2020 to help our global network cope with COVID-19 stay-at-home orders, Millie’s List features hundreds of shows, movies, books, podcasts, recipes, and more created by Barnard alumnae. With updates made regularly, this curated selection seeks to help the community stay connected to the College while supporting graduates’ endeavors beyond the gates.
Explore these picks from Millie’s Summer Reading List — you may want to consider tossing a few into your beach bag this summer.
PEGGY BACKMAN ’60
Peggy Backman, a psychologist turned fiction writer, explores how people’s behaviors can sometimes baffle us in The Painter’s Bad Day and Other Stories of Life’s Mysteries and Idiosyncrasies (2014). This collection of entertaining short stories — some realistic, some surreal — as well as essays and verse were inspired by the author’s dreams, daydreams, and nightmares, all written to amuse or give cause for reflection.
ANNE BERNAYS ’52, P’81
The Man on the Third Floor (2012) is a fictional read that chronicles the life of Walter Samson, a successful book editor living in post-World War II New York City who seems to be “leading the good American life” alongside his “extremely attractive” wife and two children. Everything changes when Walter falls for Barry Rogers — blue collar, handsome, single, and poor — and endeavors to keep their yearslong relationship secret during a time of pervasive and virulent homophobia.
KATHERINE BOO ’88
Behind the Beautiful Forevers: Life, Death, and Hope in a Mumbai Undercity (2012), an insightful and thoroughly researched piece of narrative nonfiction from Pulitzer Prizewinning author Katherine Boo, chronicles the memorable stories of families in Annawadi, a slum near the Mumbai Airport, striving to make a better life in a city of remarkable inequalities.
SUZANNE WALKER ’12
Mooncakes (2019), an award-winning graphic novel co-created by Suzanne Walker and illustrator Wendy Xu, tells a story of selfdiscovery through the eyes of Nova Huang, a teen witch whose feelings for a childhood crush — Tam Lang, who happens to be a werewolf —are rekindled as they work together to fight off dark forces in their New England town.
SASHA CAGEN ’96
In her book Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics (2004), an interactive guide to self-empowerment,
Sasha Cagen celebrates “singledom as a natural resting state.” Cagen coined the term “quirkyalone” — someone who enjoys being single (but is not opposed to being in a relationship) and generally prefers to be alone rather than date for the sake of being in a couple — and she deftly weaves comedic pop culture and self-help references into this fun and engaging read. life that she wrote while at Barnard. The novel follows 12-year-old Sophie Caco as she is sent from her impoverished Haitian village of Croix-des-Rosets to New York City — much as a young Danticat herself was — where she becomes reunited with a nightmare-plagued mother she barely remembers and uncovers painful, lifealtering secrets along the way.
DIANA CHANG ’49
With The Frontiers of Love (1956), a book that explores cultural identity through Asian and Western lenses in Japanese-occupied Shanghai during the 1940s, Diana Chang became widely known to be the first American-born Chinese person to publish a novel in the United States. Frontiers tells the story of three young Eurasian socialites searching for love while trying to resolve the inner confusion brought about by their dual identities.
EDWIDGE DANTICAT ’90
Edwidge Danticat’s Breath, Eyes, Memory (1994) evolved out of an essay about her
B.G. FIRMANI ’90
In Time’s a Thief (2017), a fictional but relatable coming-of-age story about a Barnard student’s transition to big-city life during the colorful mid-1980s, Francesca “Chess” Varani reflects back on the meaningful experiences that shaped her — from the distance of several decades of learning and the Great Recession of 20072009. Follow along as Chess explores and reevaluates her choices, from a turbulent and sometimes toxic friendship with uppercrust classmate Kendra Marr-Löwenstein to a glamorous yet gritty first job after graduation and a dynamic love affair with the boss’s troubled son.
ANNA QUINDLEN ’74
Trustee Emerita Rise and Shine (2006) is the compelling story of two sisters who are forced to reflect on what really matters after being unintentionally thrust into adversity. When Meghan Fitzmaurice, an ambitious talk-show host, reveals a truth on air, the implications echo through her personal and professional spheres and propel her sister Bridget to reevaluate her own life. Anna Quindlen effectively captures the power of sisterhood through these two sisters’ ability to tackle challenging circumstances with wit and resilience.
These titles are available on Goodreads.
Have something to share? Submit your work for consideration to be included in Millie’s List here: https://tinyurl.com/2fkerxfb
From the AABC President
Embracing Community, Welcoming All
As the first year of my three-year term as president of the Alumnae Association of Barnard College (AABC) draws to a close, I’m grateful for the honor of serving, largely because I’ve gained a closer view of the myriad ways our alumnae are extraordinary. For a small sampling of the power of our alumnae, please watch the videos of our AABC Award recipients that were created for (the stellar!) Reunion Reimagined 2021. You will see how these scientists, artists, advocates, and trailblazers were influenced by their time at Barnard to become people who make important contributions to the world. To see further evidence of the talent of our alumnae — or just to find your next good book, album, podcast, recipe, movie, television show, or gift — please visit Millie’s List, a compilation of alumnae creations that could keep anyone busy for weeks.
I know there are many of us who are neither AABC Award recipients, nor on Millie’s List, nor the owners of eye-popping titles and citations in our Class Notes. You, too, are using the fire of your Barnard education to raise families, serve communities, do meaningful work, and make important differences every day in the lives of those around you. You are vital
members of our alumnae community.
Participation in AABC events is not meant to be exclusive. You are a member in good standing if you completed one or more years at Barnard, and you are automatically eligible for all the privileges of membership.
Recently, in an anonymous survey among our own AABC board, we discovered a perception that a lack of financial means made some alumnae feel excluded at least once during the past.
Although it’s true that the Annual Gala, the College’s signature fundraiser for student financial aid, has been historically out of reach for some (and has been for me at many points in my not-so-distant past), the move to virtual this year enabled Barnard to make the event accessible to anyone who donated any amount to support the gala. All events are meant to embrace the entire alumnae community, and as the College eventually transitions back to in-person gathering, we hope to provide similar opportunities.
During a couple of the Alumnae Circles I attended in the past year, I was relieved to hear the fleshed-out versions of several alumnae stories and their resemblance to my own complex, nonlinear path, which bears little resemblance to what we envisioned for ourselves as students.
As your life shifts in unexpected ways, I hope you will consider Barnard’s AABC a constant — a source of support, learning, and community for you regardless of your circumstances, financial or otherwise. In the years to come, we will continue to have a virtual component to AABC events to make participation ever more accessible across time zones, income brackets, childcare challenges, and abilities.
Looking forward to our next two years together.
All the best,
Amy Veltman ’89 AABC President Alumnae Trustee
Parenting
School’s Out: What Next?
Alumnae parents share their thoughts on what this summer means for their kids
For the past 18 months, parents have waded through the uncertainties of the pandemic. They’ve navigated changing health mandates and school guidelines, pivoted from the classroom to remote learning, and come up with countless creative ways to keep their children social and safe. Now parents are mulling over their next challenge: how to best engage and support their children in the months before the school year starts up again. Is it time to catch up on academic work that might have fallen through the cracks? Should summer be filled with a steady stream of activities or camp? What’s the right balance?
We spoke with three alumnae parents who shared their approach to summer — and the important lessons they’ve gained over the past year.
NEW PERSPECTIVES
“If there’s anything I’ve learned from the past 18 months, it’s to not make plans but instead set goals, and that’s exactly what we’re doing this summer. Our goal is to make sure the kids get fresh air and physical activity daily, either with a walk around the neighborhood or trip to a local playground; water and bubble play a few times a week, such as visiting a local sprinkler or having them chase bubbles released by our little bubble machine; and just slow down to connect daily, checking in during meal times and while reading together. We really lost the ability to control much of our lives throughout the past 18 months, and by setting goals rather than specific plans, I hope to give the kids a little sense of control while continuing to learn to be flexible and adaptable.”
—Gloribelle J. Perez ’05 (parent of 5-year-old twins)
A STEP BACK FROM PLANNING
“Pre-pandemic, my kids were really scheduled. Now my daughter is 12 and is a little older and has the ability to be more independent. I think last summer my kids tasted more freedom and independence than usual, and they really liked that. They are now less interested in being in camp all day. I feel like the pandemic forced us to really reevaluate how we spend our time. It is okay to have nothing to do and be at peace with that.”
—Melissa Gallin ’96 (daughter, 12, and son, 8)
SETTING YOUR OWN PRIORITIES
“As our communities transition to in-person and face-to-face interactions, I am starting to see how social distancing limited my own children’s ability to interact with others. My partner and I have signed up for memberships with the Houston Zoo and museums to get them out of the house to safe environments. I am signing up myself and my stepdaughter with personal and family counseling services to better communicate and process our emotions. We’ll also take more opportunities to go on vacation and travel to locations that are safe for my 2-year-old to explore the world and develop her social skills.” —Isamar Lopez-Veracruz ’14 (daughters, 7 and 2)
We asked Tovah Klein, Director of the Barnard Center for Toddler Development, for her tips on how to help children enjoy summer and feel comfortable, supported, and ready for fall.
How should parents approach this last stretch of summer?
There may be an impulse to pour on social activities to “make up for lost time,” but I would advise parents to resist doing that. A slow and gentle reentry will work best for most children —and adults! — particularly for younger children through elementary school. Children have not been in larger groups for a long time, so being in one will take time to adjust to, as will the social dynamics of being with more than a few children at a time. Plan a few activities around a child’s interests, introduce them one at a time, and give your child time to adjust. If they are at camp, that is enough, and don’t be surprised if they have meltdowns at home as they adjust to being out in a group at camp. If they are new to seeing friends again, monitor how much time they want to be with friends and how much they can handle. Small steps will allow children to adjust and feel comfortable socially, and then you can open [social time] more.
After a year of remote or hybrid learning and before this new chapter in the fall, what are some of the experiences and moments should families prioritize, and why?
Having family time — even in small doses — should be a priority. Children have missed the social realm, and family members have been their consistent companions. Don’t quickly sever that. I suggest planning some fun summer family outings, which can be as simple as a picnic in a local park or visiting someplace new together. Depending on your comfort level of being in crowds, it could be going to an amusement park together or water park. Pick a few fun summer activities to do as a family and spread them out, maybe even bring along a close friend of your child. This family time, out in the world, is a positive next step before returning to the regularity of in-person school.
Are there any steps you suggest parents take to help their children process this past year before they’re back in school and change routines?
Parents can reflect on the year with their children. Talk about what the child has experienced during the pandemic — from the shutdown and parents working at home to online school, [social] pods, and their experiences. Recognize that there has been a lot of change, and now life is changing again as more places open up. Ask your child what good memories they have of the year and what they missed. Children count on parents to weave a narrative and pull the pieces together. This has been a huge life event, and having a narrative about it will help them feel safer as they reenter the world more fully again. B
