What's in it for me? Full Edition by Christopher Beckwith

________________ Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in it for me? me? Christopher Beckwith

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Christopher Beckwith

One This is me

he traffic driving home from work was unbearable. Urged by my straining bladder and the deflating gas gauge, I decided to stop to relieve myself, fill up the tank and pick up a six pack so I could handle everything in one stop. Spotting a gas station at the end of the block, I speedily crossed two lanes to the sound of honking horns and pulled up to the first available pump. I jumped out of my car, raced through the door and made a beeline for the restroom. Walking in, I saw a tall, caramel-complexioned brotha at a urinal. He was sexy as hell with a bald head as smooth as a baby’s bottom, the build of an NBA superstar with legs that raised damn near chest high. I walked over to the urinal and pulled out my impatient partner to handle my business. I wanted to catch a glimpse of his meat but I just continued to stare at the wall instead. That’s when I heard, “Sup man?” I was shocked as I glanced over. I tried to look away but my eyes locked on him as he stroked his hardness. Then he asked, “Like that, huh?” All I could say was, “Hell to da yeah!” He suddenly grabbed my ass and said, “Let’s do this!” My quivering voice uttered, “Sounds good to me.”

What’s in in it for me? He was struggling to stuff his pole in his pants but with a twist of his left leg, he managed to get it all back inside. “I’ll be outside,” he said zipping up and walking out. I was shaking so bad I could hardly keep my balance. I took a deep breath then walked out of the restroom without giving a thought to washing my hands. I noticed him standing out front so I grabbed a six pack from the cooler and headed to the counter. I was greeted by the cashier as she rang up the beer. It seemed a little strange that the cash register sounded like my alarm clock. Damn, it was my alarm clock! I reluctantly accepted the reality that it was morning already. Laughing, I realized something like that would never happen to me, not Ronald Davis. It could only happen in my dreams. It seemed more like something that would happen to my friend Randy. He’s the kind of person that just doesn’t give a damn; like it or not, appearances don’t’ matter to him. Randy has told me countless stories of random encounters; everything from seducing Professors in college to giving in to the lusty desires of truckers at rest areas—that dude has done it all! He’s a thick guy with average looks but what he lacks in beauty, he more than makes up for with wit. I remember him telling me that the football coach at his high school talked to him about joining the team because of his size. He said he told the coach he’d rather try out for cheerleader and that his ability to do a split proved he had the skills. I’ve known Randy for eight years but it seems like we’ve been friends forever. I met him one Saturday while I was trying the cologne testers at Macy’s. I overheard him reduce the obnoxious clerk to tears by telling her he couldn’t tell where

Christopher Beckwith her big lips ended and her tiny ears began. At that point, I knew we’d be friends forever. Lying there engulfed in the sheets, I realized I had company so I lifted the covers to see my morning wood jump in hopes of a rub down. “Sorry lil’ man but it’s time for work,” I said. I tried to justify spending a few more minutes in my cocoon but it was getting late so I forced myself off the bed and headed to the bathroom. ‘Nothing wakes you up like a hot shower,’ I thought staring at the foggy mirror. What I really needed was a cold shower after that frustrating dream but the water was already hot. Stepping in the shower, I remembered how much I love my job; it’s just getting up every morning that’s the problem. I’m a Senior Design Consultant with Brandon Properties; it’s a great job but sometimes I have to remind myself. When I enrolled at Hampton University, I really didn’t know what I wanted to do after college. I settled on a major in Business Administration because it just seemed like a safe route to take at the time. And then there was Professor Phillips. Professor Michael Phillips was one of the instructors in the Architectural department. He was well over six feet with a chocolate complexion, a toned body and a smile you could see from across campus. He was one of the finest black men I’d ever laid eyes on. I signed up for Professor Phillips’ Introduction to Drafting course out of curiosity. I thought it would be fun and I’d do anything to sit in class every day and look at that Adonis. After sailing through the class, I figured what the hell so I registered in Intermediate Drafting and Space Planning breez-

What’s in in it for me? ing through both. I was enjoying Architecture so I decided to change my major. Just before graduation, I was able to snag an internship at Brandon Properties; an Atlanta development firm that was starting to build homes in other cities as well. I began my internship after graduating with a BA in Architecture and was offered a permanent position a few months later. Once I was dressed, I grabbed my keys and headed for my car. I was glad the weather was nicer than the thunderstorms that slammed Atlanta the day before; I just hoped my car would be as cooperative. I had been driving the same Nissan Altima since college. It was a gift from my parents so I’d have transportation in Hampton and could come home to Winston-Salem whenever I wanted. I’m an only child so I guess they figured they could splurge on the car to make life in Virginia easier for me. I’ve considered getting a new car but I cringe at the thought of a car note. The traffic was lighter than normal but I was in no hurry to get to work. I was enticed by Krispy Kreme’s ‘Hot Donuts Now’ sign so I turned in for a sticky treat. I was greeted by Miss Ella’s cheery smile when I walked in. She’s pear shaped with plump jaws, eyes as bright as new dimes and an ass the size of an SUV. “Good morning Ronnie!” she chirped. Other than my mom, she’s the only person that calls me that and I always get a kick out of it. Her sweet voice usually puts a smile on my face and she comes across as if the feeling is mutual. “Good morning,” I sang out with a smile in my voice. As I stepped closer, she asked, “So how ya’ feeling.

Christopher Beckwith “Oh, I’m making it,” I said. “And how are you?” With a rub of her belly, she replied, “I’m doing the best I can with what I got! What can I get for you sweetie?” I was about to order three glazed donuts when I thought of my co-workers. I knew they’d go off if I didn’t bring extras so I ordered two dozen instead. “Okay Ronnie, got ya’ covered!” she said waddling back to the conveyor belt to get donuts fresh from the oven. She put the box on the counter then said, “There you go sweetie!” I gave Miss Ella a twenty dollar bill and thanked her for making my mornings so pleasant. “Anything for my Ronnie,” she said with a wink. I returned the wink, took my change and headed for my car so I could get to work. I was having a little trouble finding a parking space and to make matters worse, my watch confirmed I was late after all. I prayed no one would notice then I realized the donuts were the perfect peace offering to justify being late. Steve looked up with a donut-induced grin as I walked by his desk. “Yo man, why you so late?” he asked. I cut my eyes silently advising him to mind his business as I made my way to the break room. He stood up with wide-stretched arms asking, “So can a brotha get some of them sweet goodies?” “They’ll be in the break room,” I said without stopping. “Oh yeah, Mr. Pendleton wants to see you in his office.” I wondered if he wanted to talk to me about being late then thought, ‘Oh well.’ Rita was pouring a cup of coffee when I walked in. I greeted her with a casual, “Good morning Rita!”

What’s in in it for me? “Hey Ron,” she said as I put the box on the counter. “So you brought donuts; are they hot?” “Yeah, they should still be pretty…” She had already opened the box and plucked up one of the shiny jewels before I could finish my sentence. Rita bit into the donut then moaned, “That’s good!” “Well, I’m glad they meet your approval,” I said. I stopped at my desk to check my emails. Sure enough, Mr. Pendleton’s was waiting at the top of my inbox. I opened it and read that he wanted to talk to me about working on a special project. I wondered what kind of project he had in mind as I logged out then headed off to see him. When I walked into the executive suite, Mr. Pendleton’s secretary, Devon, tried to hide a game of solitaire by blocking her monitor. Her ample tits could outshine the sun but they did her attempt to hide the game on her screen little justice. “Good morning Devon; Mr. Pendleton wants to see me.” Switching screens, she said, “You can go on in Ron; he’s waiting for you.” It was no secret that Mr. Pendleton was more interested in her looks than her clerical skills. Devon had a killer body and the face of a slightly tainted angel. Her hair greeted us weekly with the results of her weekend salon visit and her trendy gear gave the impression that she was going clubbing instead of coming to work. As I walked to the door, Devon turned back to resume the game as if it was part of her job description. I laughed as I wondered how long she would get away with her attitude. I was anxious as I knocked because I wasn’t sure what I was in for. “Come on in,” I heard through the Mahogany door.

Christopher Beckwith Mr. Pendleton was on the phone when I walked in. He covered the mouthpiece and offered me a seat. Getting back to the call, he said, “He just walked in Tom. I’ll call you back after I fill him in on the details of the trip.” I was uneasy about the word ‘trip’ and wondered if I wanted to hear what he had in store for me. Settling back in the plush leather chair, he said, “I’ve got a project for ya’ Ron. They’re having problems with some of the details at the Dawson Park development. I need you and Steve to fly to Houston and help them out.” I was hoping not to sound difficult when I asked, “Can’t they just email the blueprints so we can work on them here?” “Not this time Ron; Tom said they’ve already started on phase one and he doesn’t wanna get behind. He thinks y’all could get more accomplished if you saw the development in person. I’ll need you to leave tomorrow.” I looked at him thinking, ‘I can’t leave that soon!’ He noticed my reluctance and said, “I know this is short notice but we need to get this done right away. I’ve already asked Devon to book your flight.” I knew I didn’t have much choice so I told him I’d clear my schedule in order to make the trip. “Good! I knew I could count on you Ron.” Steve was waiting with a big grin when I made it to my desk. “So I guess you got the good news,” he said eagerly. I grumbled, “Yeah, he told me.” His grin widened as he added, “Man, I hear Houston is the business; my boy was just telling me they got some sweet honies down there!” I could already see him dragging me to every strip club in town; the last thing I needed was Houston’s barracudas in

What’s in in it for me? my wallet. Even though I didn’t know anyone in Houston, I told him I was planning to spend most of my free time with my favorite aunt and her family. “Oh well, more honies for me!” he said. I figured I should call Randy because I was sure he’d be pissed that I wouldn’t be able to join him for our weekly trip to The Cock Pit. It’s a grubby hole in the wall where Wicked Wednesday is the hottest night of the week. They’re known for stronger than strong cheap cocktails and the nastiest male strippers around. Randy answered on the first ring as if he was expecting my call. “What’s up Randy; have you made it to work yet?” “No Ron, I’m getting ready to leave now. What’s up?” “My boss is sending me to Houston so I won’t be able to go to the club with you on Wednesday.” “Now that’s what’s up; the brothas in Houston are fine!” I giggled as I replied, “I hear the ladies are hot too!” I wasn’t sure which was funnier—Randy’s smirk or his rolling eyes as he snapped, “Like you’re into fish!” I joked, “Only if it’s fried baby!” As our laughter faded, he said Houston could be hot and asked if I wanted some company. “But don’t you have to work?” “Ron, you know I don’t have a problem calling in sick!” “That’s just it Randy; any other time I’d be glad to have you tag along but Steve is going too.” “You know I’m in now,” he squealed. “I’d give anything to worship those thick thighs!” “Forget it Randy; he’s already talking about hooking up with the honies in Houston.”

Christopher Beckwith “He’ll forget all about those Houston hoochies after he gets a little bit of this good honey pot!” I laughed out loud before I could catch myself. “So when are you leaving?” he asked. “I’m catching a flight first thing in the morning.” “Well, you wanna go to The Hideout tonight?” he asked. “You might find a trick to warm you up for the trip!” The Hideout is a seedy little bar where street hustlers try to get guys from the after work crowd to buy them drinks. “Okay, I’m in as long as we don’t stay out too late.” “Then it’s a date!” he replied. “I’ll swing by after work.” “Cool,” I said before hanging up to get some work done.

What’s in in it for me?

Two Paper or Plastic?

realized how nice the weather was as I pulled out of the parking deck. It was the perfect day to kick back on the balcony, grill some steaks and enjoy a glass of wine. Then I laughed as I realized all I needed was the steaks and wine. I decided to stop at the supermarket on my way home. I figured Randy could come over for dinner and then we’d go to The Hideout after polishing off the wine. ‘Damn, I'll be here forever!’ I thought as I walked in. I was hoping I’d be in and out but the endless lines let me know I was gonna be a while. Since I was already there, I grabbed a cart and headed for the meat department. I was looking through the steaks when I suddenly heard, “Porterhouse is the best cut you can buy.” I turned to find out who was making the recommendation and saw the sexiest piece of chocolate I’d ever seen. He was wearing a Falcon’s jersey, black sweatpants and a huge smile that was replaced by a lusty grin as he nodded toward his groin and flexed his bulge. “Follow me,” he said. “I wanna show you something.” I wasn’t sure if I should go with him but my feet were already moving. I followed him to the restroom tucked away in the back corner. Once the door was closed, he wrapped his arms around me from behind grinding his stiff shaft against

Christopher Beckwith my ass. Then my arousal matched his instantly as he nibbled my ear. He whispered, “Like that, huh?” I tried to respond but all I could do was moan. I struggled to break free as he pushed me into an empty stall but it was no use. “We can’t do this,” I said but my plea fell on deaf ears. I found myself hugging the wall with my pants around my ankles and nearly lost my mind as his tongue connected with my ass. I tried not to moan but it felt so good! He whispered, “We can’t stay in here long; I just had to get you off to myself for a while.” I was dazed by his forwardness as I tried to wrap my head around the unbelievable scenario. “But you don’t know me,” I gasped trying to catch my breath. He gave my ass a sharp swat and said, “I know but that sweet little booty caught my attention from across the store.” I couldn’t help wondering how long this dude had been watching me. Then he asked, “Can I see you later?” Before I could speak, the door opened with a loud bang. I scrambled to pull my pants up as a little voice asked, “Daddy, are you in here? Mommy said she’s ready to go!” My captor raised a finger to his lips. “Tell mommy I’ll be right out,” he said. “Okay,” the little boy replied as he walked out. A look of relief quickly covered my mystery man’s face as he said, “I’m sorry, I wasn’t expecting that.” I couldn’t help thinking, ‘Really?’ He reached into his pocket then handed me his card and said, “I’m Ted; you should call me so we can finish this.”

What’s in in it for me? I tried to tell him I wasn’t into married men but he left the stall and opened the door causing the same bang as his son before I could speak. I glanced at the card which read:

I wasn’t gonna call him but I slid the card in my pocket anyway. Damn, he was fine! I headed for the meat counter and picked out a pack of Porterhouse steaks since they were so highly recommended. I went over to the wine aisle, grabbed a couple of bottles then headed to the checkout counters. When I made it to the front of the store, Ted and his wife were putting their bags in a cart while Jr. tore into a candy bar. That’s when I noticed how beautiful his wife really was. She was petite with a mocha complexion, her jeans looked like they had been painted on and her silky shoulder-length hair moved as if it had a life of its own. I’ve always thought it was a curse for a man to have such a beautiful wife and still have an appetite for dudes. I reached for my phone to call Randy when I got in the car. I hadn’t heard from him so I wanted to make sure that we were still on. Picking up on the third ring, he snapped, “What!” Backing out of the parking space, I asked if he was okay. “I’m sorry Ron; I’m just tired of this bitch!”

Christopher Beckwith “Okay, what bitch are you talking about?” “Sarah!” he growled. “You mean your supervisor?” “Yeah, that bitch just wrote me up again!” I tried to calm Randy down by telling him I picked up a couple of bottles of wine and steaks to throw on the grill. “I know you wanna eat before we go to the club.” His mood lightened instantly. “Ron, I was so pissed that I forgot about going out tonight; I’m feeling better already!” “Good, I’ll see you at my place when you get off work.” “Okay, get your ass home and cook my dinner bitch!”

What’s in in it for me?

Three Soup’s on

was slapped by a blast of hot air when I opened the door to my apartment. Thinking it wouldn’t be so hot, I didn’t bother to set the air conditioning before I left for work. I was regretting it because it was blazing. I put the bags on the counter then checked the pantry to make sure I had enough charcoal for the steaks. I found a bag that was more than half full and said, “Perfect!” I headed to my bedroom to get out of my work clothes, slipped on a pair of jeans and a tank then went to the living room to find some music. I had just bought Anthony David’s new CD the day before so it was the perfect choice. As the music filled my apartment, I went to the kitchen to season the steaks so they’d have plenty of time to marinate. I put them in the refrigerator then grabbed the charcoal and headed outside to start the fire. Once the blaze was going, I went back inside to make a salad. It didn’t take long to doctor up a bag of salad mix with diced tomatoes, cucumbers and a chopped onion. With that done, I reached for the bottle to pour a glass of wine. As I filled my glass, I thought about my encounter with Ted. It was a turn on to be hit on at the supermarket but once I thought of his wife, I dismissed the idea of hooking up with a married man.

Christopher Beckwith I knew it would be a while before the steaks were ready so decided to call my mom to tell her about my trip. After a few rings, she answered, “Hello.” “Hey Ma,” I said. “Oh, hey Ronnie; I was just thinking about you.” I was in a playful mood so I teased, “Is that so?” “Yeah, your dad asked if I had talked to you and I told him no.” “Ma, I just talked to you last week.” “Like I said!” she snapped. “Well, I’m glad to hear y’all were thinking about me.” “You know we’re always thinking about you Ronnie. So what’s new?” I told her I was going to Houston for a couple of days to help out with a design project. “Now that is good news!” she said. “Yeah, that’s what my co-worker keeps telling me!” “I’m sure you’ll have fun; Houston is very exciting!” “I don’t know how much fun I’ll have but at least I’ll get away for a few days.” “So when are you leaving?” I sighed, “First thing in the morning.” “That soon, huh?” “Yeah but I’ll only be there for a few days; I hope it’s not more than that.” “Well, I’m sure you’ll have a good time,” she said. Remembering the comment Steve made about the honies in Houston, I replied, “Yeah, that’s what I hear!” I wasn’t surprised when my mom added, “Ronnie, you should call Emma Dalton while you’re there.” Visiting my mother’s sorority sister was the last thing I

What’s in in it for me? wanted to do. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings so I promised I would try. “I’m sure Emma would love to see you,” she said. I changed the subject by asking if my dad was home. “No, he went to the tackle shop to get some fishing line.” “Um, um, um, I could go for some of your fried fish.” She was quick to respond, “I’ll be happy to fry some the next time you come home and yes, that’s a hint!” I conceded with a respectful, “Okay Ma.” “And now that you bring it up, are you eating?” “Yes, I’m eating; I was just about to put some steaks on the grill.” My mom seemed surprised as she asked, “You mean to tell me you’re leaving on a big trip tomorrow and you still have time to grill steaks?” I laughed as I explained that Randy was coming over for dinner and then we were going out for drinks. “That Randy is a mess!” she chuckled. “Make sure to tell him I said hello, okay?” “Okay Ma, I will.” “And don’t stay out too late now; you don’t wanna miss your flight.” I replied, “I won’t Ma, I promise.” There was no mistaking the smile in her voice when she said, “I love you; make sure to call me when you get back.” I told her I would then ended the call. I headed for the balcony to check on the fire but I was suddenly startled by the ‘clank’ of my doorknocker. When I checked to see who it was, Randy flashed a huge grin as his face filled my peephole. “Hey trick!” he sang out when I opened the door.

Christopher Beckwith “What are you doing here so soon?” I asked. “It was slow so they let a few of us leave early.” “Looks like you’re feeling better,” I said. “Yes ma’am, reminding me that we’re going to the club was all it took to change my mood!” I told Randy to lock the door and asked if he wanted a glass of wine. He fired back, “Baby, you already know!” I poured a glass for him and refreshed mine. I suggested we sit on the terrace and asked him to carry the glasses while I grabbed the steaks. He was standing at the railing sipping his wine when I stepped outside. I checked on the fire then said, “It’s ready, hand me the steaks.” Once I had them on the grill, I took a seat at the table and reached for my wine. I couldn’t resist telling him about my encounter with Ted so I said, “Randy, you’ll never guess what happened at the supermarket.” “Please tell me you won big on a scratch off ticket.” “I wish, but it was almost as exciting.” “Well, I’m all ears!” he said. “You probably won’t believe this but I almost got raped in the bathroom.” He rolled his eyes as he snapped, “Bitch, you can’t rape the willing!” The fact that he was dead on caused us both to laugh. “Okay, tell me what happened,” he said before taking a sip of wine. I told him Ted approached me at the meat counter then lured me into the restroom and proceeded to make a meal of my ass.

What’s in in it for me? Randy fired back, “Ron, stop lying!” “That’s just the beginning; the next thing I knew, his son came in looking for him.” Nearly chocking on his wine, he asked, “His son walked in on y’all?” “Yeah, his wife sent their son in looking for him.” He choked again gasping, “His wife was there too?” “Yes ma’am and she turned out to be gorgeous!” Randy clutched his chest as he responded, “Now that’s a bold muthafucka!” I joked, “Baby, can you say understatement?” “And then some!” he huffed. “But he was fine as hell I’ll tell you that much!” Randy quickly asked if I was gonna see him again. “Hell no!” I snapped. Clearly baffled, Randy snarled, “Huh!” “Yeah, he gave me his card but I’m not gonna call him!” His expression proved he was convinced that I’d finally lost my mind. “Now Randy, you know I don’t do married men.” He instantly replied, “Speak for yourself; what she don’t know won’t hurt her!” “That’s just it Randy; I wouldn’t wanna hurt any woman like that.” “You see Ron, that’s the difference between us. I feel like it’s the man’s place to worry about the woman’s feelings.” “You’re right Randy; that is the difference between us.” “It’s a good thing you’re so disciplined, I wanna be just like you when I grow up but until then it’s on baby!” “It’s not about discipline; some of these wives don’t play when it comes to their husbands.”

Christopher Beckwith That gave Randy something to think about. “Okay, enough about married men; whatever happened to that cutie you went to the movies with last week?” I rolled my eyes just thinking about it. “Remember I told you he got mad because I wouldn’t let him come over after the movie?” His response was a dry, “Yeah child, I remember.” “I guess that proved he just wanted some ass because I didn’t hear from him. I called him the next day but he never called me back.” “What a surprise!” he replied sarcastically. “I’m glad I didn’t sleep with him now. I mean, he was hot but I was tired and I had to work the next day.” Randy sucked his teeth and said, “Ron, I’ll bet he called another piece as soon as y’all left the theater.” It was hard not to laugh as I said, “You’re right Randy! I’ve been on like a million dates since I moved to Atlanta and they’re all the same; if you’re not giving it up—the date is over. You’re wasting your time if you want something real!” “Oh child, get over it!” he snapped. “It is what it is!” I said, “I know Randy but I’m not trying to be a notch on anybody’s belt!” He laughed as I got up to flip the steaks. “They’re almost ready,” I said. “You ready to eat?” Looking at me with a smirk, he responded, “Now what do you think?”

What’s in in it for me?

Four The Hideout

was relieved the line wasn’t as long as I expected when we drove past The Hideout. We were always in the habit of driving by the club to see how long the line was just in case we didn’t want to go to the trouble of waiting half the night to get in. Randy noticed two of his friends near the end of the line and said, “There’s Richard and Bryan.” He asked me to tap my horn to get their attention then rolled his window down and asked how long they had been waiting. Richard answered, “About ten minutes.” That was a sure sign the club was packed. After shoving a few bills into the payment box at the parking lot next to the club, we joined Richard and Bryan in line. Hugging Randy, Bryan said, “I figured you were already in the club.” “Child, Ron cooked dinner so I had to feed my face. It’s hard work keeping the trade happy!” The line inched forward and soon we were at the door flashing our IDs. Once we were inside, Randy led the way to get drinks from his favorite bartender Jerry. He squealed, “Hey Jurr-dine!” “Hey baby,” Jerry said flashing his million dollar smile. “What are y’all drinking tonight?”

Christopher Beckwith Randy ordered a Malibu Rum and pineapple juice then asked what I was drinking. “Let me get a Jack with a splash of Coke.” Randy quickly asked, “Did you hear that Jerry?” “Yeah baby, coming right up!” “This round is on me,” Randy said to his friends. “What do y’all whores want to drink?” Bryan asked for a Long Island Iced Tea. “Get me a Heineken,” Richard said with his gaze locked on the eye candy in the corner. “There you go fellas,” Jerry said when he returned with the drinks. Randy handed me my drink as he ordered the others. “Got ya’ covered,” Jerry said with a wink. “Damn, that’s strong!” I wheezed as my head swooned from the first sip. Randy fired back, “That’s why he’s the only bartender I fuck with!” Richard reached for his drink then told us he was going to holla at the sexy dude in the back playing Centipede. Randy teased, “All right, handle your business!” Manuel had the turntables blazing so we walked over to the dance floor to get a better view of the crowd. Most people knew him as DJ Hurricane but he and Randy were on a first name basis. “That’s my cue,” Randy said when Manuel motioned for us to join him in the DJ booth. He knew there was usually a treat in store when Manuel invited us into his private chamber. “Y’all go ahead; I’m on a mission tonight!” Bryan said in search of a different kind of diversion.

What’s in in it for me? Randy joked, “Save one for me, Mama needs love too!” I followed Randy across the dance floor to the DJ booth where we were met by Manuel’s smile. “Ain’t seen you in weeks Randy; where ya’ been?” Rolling his eyes, Randy said, “Working like a Jamaican!” “Sounds like a good thing to me!” Manuel chuckled. Randy snapped, “I guess!” Manuel eagerly asked, “Y’all up for some nose candy?” I told him I didn’t do cocaine, “…but don’t mind me.” “Whatever,” Randy said. “Bring it on!” Manuel pulled a folded dollar bill from his pocket and handed it to Randy who used a key to scoop up a mound of the nasal delight. With an upturned nose, he shuddered as the sensation sent a rush through his body. He repeated the gesture with his other nostril bringing on another shudder. I was tempted to join them but decided to pass. I’d never tried cocaine so I didn’t want to push my luck with a flight the next morning. Randy hoarsely said, “Damn, that’s some good shit!” “Only the best for you baby!” Manuel responded. When he asked if I was sure that I didn’t want a bump, I said, “Y’all go ahead; one of us needs to keep a clear head.” “Okay, just don’t say I didn’t offer,” Manuel said before taking a couple of quick hits. In no time, the powdery treat had Randy under its spell; he was twirling around like he hadn’t heard music before. “Manuel, you’re a beast on those turntables!” he said. “This club wouldn’t be shit if I wasn’t up here bangin’ these dope beats!” Boredom set in so I told Randy I was going to the bar. “Okay Ron, let’s see what’s poppin’ up in here!”

Christopher Beckwith Randy hugged Manuel and thanked him for the treat. “Don’t mention it baby.” My tipsy friend followed me out of the DJ booth. On the way to the bar, our path was blocked by a well-built brotha leaning over a pool table taking a shot. He was dressed in a sweatsuit with the jacket unzipped intentionally exposing his sculpted chest. He was hot but a little seedy for my taste. “Watch out,” he said in a sensuous tone. “I don’t wanna poke y’all with this stick!” I wasn’t surprised when Randy responded, “Sounds like fun to me!” Licking his lips, the dude said, “I’m Bruce but you can call me Brucie ‘cause I love boy poo-ssy.” Randy thought the quip was funny but it was the lamest line I’d ever heard. “Well Brucie, we’re on our way to the bar,” I said. Randy stalled adding, “Yeah, we need fresh drinks.” “That’s okay,” Bruce said. “I’m not going anywhere.” Randy’s response was a seductive, “I’m gonna hold you to that.” As we walked to the bar, I told Randy that had to be the worst line I’d ever heard. “Yeah, it was corny but is he fine or what?” “Oh, he’s fine but I bet he’ll have his hand out before the night is over!” Randy sighed, “I know but he sure is good to look at.” Jerry asked, “Jack with a splash of Coke, right?” “Yeah, and another Malibu Rum and pineapple juice for Randy.” Flashing that precious smile, Jerry said, “I’m on it!” I offered to treat since Randy paid for the first round.

What’s in in it for me? “Sounds good to me,” he said. I tried to pay when Jerry finished the drinks but he said, “Don’t worry about it Ron; they’re on me.” I dropped a five in the tip jar then handed the drink to Randy. His gaze was locked on Bruce so I cleared my throat to get his attention. “Here’s your drink; do I need to drink it for you too?” Randy sneered, “Baby, that’s a service I’ll never need!” “Well, snap out of it and take this damn drink!” “I just can’t take my eyes off those thick thighs!” “Randy, I’m sure you can get your share of that piece for a price!” I said. Cutting his eyes, he huffed, “I’m just having a little fun!” “Okay Randy, I wasn’t trying to ruin our night.” “Well, you’re on your way there!” he snapped. I told him to drink up so I could get home. He was still a little salty so I said, “I know you’re not interested in Bruce.” “Ron, you know me better than that; I may be a slut but I’m not stupid!” I was relieved he hadn’t lost his edge so I joked, “Good, I was about to strip you of your diva card!” “Baby, once a diva—always a diva!”

Christopher Beckwith

Five What happens in Houston…

he flight to Houston seemed shorter than I expected; I figured it was probably because Steve slept most of the way there. The view of Houston from the plane’s window assured me that I was in for a good time and I could hardly wait to ditch Steve and start my adventure. Shaking him as we neared the airport, I said, “Wake up man, we’re here!” He was a little groggy but that didn’t last. Once the pilot turned off the seatbelt sign, he eagerly said, “Let’s do this!” “Enjoy your stay in Houston,” the flight attendant said as we exited the plane. I thanked her secretly hoping the men of Houston would be as accommodating. Walking through the terminal, I noticed the sexy men in their flattering uniforms and realized the trip could turn out to be fun after all. I was ready for a taste of Houston. The other passengers were already picking through the luggage on the carousel when we arrived at baggage claim. We waded through the crowd, grabbed our bags and headed outside to look for a taxi. The morning sun engulfed us like a warm blanket as we stepped outside. I noticed a thin man with an ashy coal complexion headed our way. His heavy sweater and corduroys

What’s in in it for me? had me wondering what the hell he was thinking when he got dressed. We were caught off guard when he reached for our bags. “You men need a taxi?” he asked in a Nigerian accent. Steve relaxed as he told the driver we were going to the Hilton Americas downtown. Speaking almost too fast for us to understand, he said, “I can take you men there.” Annoyed when we reached for our bags, he huffed, “Okay, follow me; my car is over there!” When we reached the taxi, the driver was waiting with body language that implied impatience. There was no hiding his frustration as he tossed Steve’s bags in the trunk before doing the same with mine. Sensing my irritation, Steve joked, “Don’t sweat it man; let’s just get to the hotel.” I followed his lead sliding into the back seat of the aging Chevrolet Impala. The driver got in and closed the stubborn door twice before starting the engine and pulling away from the curb. “I am Dodi; I can get you men to the Hilton very fast!” That was an understatement; Dodi raced away from the airport ripping past the blur of the other cars. I was thankful he was in a hurry because I was ready for a taste of Houston. It was hard not to laugh as Dodi sang along with Wilson Pickett blaring through the car’s speakers. “This is good music, yes?” he asked. I answered, “It sure is, my mother loves Wilson Pickett.” Through a big grin, he said, “She is a smart woman; this music is better than that new shit they sing today!” Laughing, I asked how long he had lived in Houston. “I’m here eight years now,” he answered proudly. “I am

Christopher Beckwith in love with Houston, it reminds me of Nigeria!” Attempting to sound interested, I asked, “So you’re from Nigeria?” “Yes, but I like America better!” Steve couldn’t help asking what he liked about America. “The American women!” Dodi said with a lusty grin. “That makes two of us!” Steve chuckled. Then Dodi asked, “So did you men come to Houston for business or pleasure?” “Hopefully a little of both!” Steve answered. With a nod, Dodi said, “The beautiful women are here!” Steve shot Dodi a wink adding, “I’m counting on it!” In no time, we were pulling up to the hotel. Steve and I laughed as Dodi came to a screeching halt then bolted from the car to get our bags from the trunk. I focused on the doorman as he opened the door. His tailored uniform fit him perfectly, his complexion was a rich bronze and silky waves crowned his head; he was eye candy at its best! “Welcome to the Hilton Americas. I’m Derrick and I’ll be happy to help you gentlemen with your luggage,” he said. Steve thanked him then went to check on our bags. I was in awe of Derrick’s firm grip as he helped me out of the car. ‘Snap out of it!’ I thought. We followed him inside after Steve paid Dodi. The lobby was more elegant than I expected; fine artwork covered the walls, the marble floors were gleaming and the furniture was stylish but the firm globes trapped in Derrick’s uniform were far more impressive. He parked the luggage cart near the front desk then offered a pleasant smile as he said, “The desk clerk will have a

What’s in in it for me? bellman escort you to your room once you’re checked in.” The woman at the front desk had a mocha complexion and manicured haircut that reminded me of Anita Baker. Her smile was inviting and her demeanor was rather personable. Steve switched into ‘Mack’ mode as we approached the counter. In an oddly sultry tone, he asked, “So how are you doing today?” The clerk remained professional as she responded, “I’m doing just fine sir. Do you have a reservation?” The dazzling rock on her finger confirmed there was a husband in the equation but it had no effect on Steve. A sly smile settled on his face as he handed her his credit card to process the check in. She located our reservation and within minutes said we were all set. As she turned to get our keys, I told Steve she might not be the one to push up on. He joked, “You never know man; she just might need a brotha on the side to get that thang gooey!” I cringed at the thought and said, “If you say so.” Standing patiently by our luggage, Derrick smiled and asked, “Is there anything else I can do for you gentlemen?” I figured it was a hint that he was waiting for a tip so I said, “No, I think we’re fine.” When I handed Derrick a five dollar bill, he enclosed my hand in a handshake with the money wedged inside. His expression implied that he was being more than just cordial as he caressed my hand and said, “Thank you, Mr…” “I’m Ron,” I replied thoroughly enjoying the attention. Without releasing my hand, he responded, “It’s nice to meet you Ron; enjoy your stay.” In an attempt to prolong the moment, I replied, “Thanks

Christopher Beckwith Derrick, I’m sure I will.” Slowly letting go of my hand, he said, “Be sure to let me know if you need anything.” Lowering his voice, he added, “…and I do mean anything.” I wanted to take him upstairs but instead I said, “I’ll be sure to remember that.” Derrick headed for the entrance then stopped to flash his charming smile before stepping outside. The desk clerk motioned for a bellman to assist us with our luggage. She handed him the keycards then asked if he would take us to our room. “Good morning gentlemen,” he said. “I’m Everett, I’ll be happy to show you to your room.” We followed him to an empty elevator that seemed to be awaiting our arrival. “We’ll be there in no time,” Everett said pushing the cart inside. He made room for us and hit the button for our floor as he asked, “Are you gentlemen in Houston on business?” “Yeah, but I’m hoping to have some fun too!” Steve said. Everett replied, “Oh, that shouldn’t be a problem; there’s plenty to do here in Houston!” Again Steve responded, “I’m counting on it!” The elevator doors opened to a richly decorated hallway as Everett said, “Follow me, your room is right this way.” I was eager to get a look at the room as we followed him inside. To say I was pleased is an understatement. Once Everett had our bags on the luggage racks, a smile covered his face as he asked, “Will that be all gentlemen?” “I’ll handle this one,” Steve said reaching for his wallet. “Thank you sir!” Everett responded with a bright smile. As he turned to leave, I asked if the restaurant was still

What’s in in it for me? serving breakfast. “Yes sir, the restaurant serves breakfast until eleven but you can order it from room service until twelve.” I was relieved that it wasn’t too late to get breakfast; the thought of sausage, eggs and hot coffee only intensified my hunger. I asked Steve if he wanted to grab something to eat before we headed out since the contractor wasn’t picking us up until eleven. “Sounds good, let me take a leak and we can bounce!”

Christopher Beckwith

Six Time to shine fter breakfast, we checked to see if our ride had arrived. I noticed a white pickup truck pulling up as we walked outside. Once the driver stepped out, I asked if he was from Dawson Park. Right away, he headed in our direction and extended his hand for a shake. “Howdy, I’m Tom Davis,” he said grabbing my hand in an unbearable grip. “Hey Tom, I’m Ronald Davis; maybe we’re related.” It was hard not to laugh because we clearly weren’t. He was a short, stocky man with hair that grayed at the temples. He was dressed in khakis, a plaid shirt and a Houston Oilers cap. Did I forget to mention he was White? I stretched my fingers into shape as I introduced Steve. “Nice to meet ya’ Steve,” Tom said as he shook his hand. “Y’all ‘bout ready to head out?” Handling the shake better than I did, Steve responded, “Ready as we’ll ever be!” Tom told us we had a lot of work to do but it shouldn’t take long. “Y’all should be outta here by Thursday—I hope you boys won’t be too bored down here in Houston.” I bit my lip to mask my irritation at being called boys. Steve said, “Ron is planning to spend his free time with family so he’ll have plenty to keep him busy.”

What’s in in it for me? “So you shouldn’t be bored at all,” Tom said. I simply responded, “I guess not.” Climbing into the larger than life truck took some work. Once we were inside, Tom peeled off pinning us against the seats before we could buckle our seatbelts. Trying to find anything other than Country music on the radio, he asked, “Y’all been to Houston before?” “I had a layover here once on a flight to Los Angeles but I only got to see the city from the plane,” Steve said. I told him I’d never been to Houston but I was looking forward to seeing my ‘family’. I was sure he had no idea what I meant. The development was a buzz of activity with bulldozers moving dirt around while subcontractors hammered, sawed, and drilled. As we climbed out of the truck, Tom said he wanted us to meet his assistant. He led us into the site trailer and introduced Sam who was sitting behind a small desk. He appeared to be in his forties with a muscular build, a shaved head and a salt and pepper goatee. Sam’s arms were as thick as my thighs and his smile was pearly white. He was fine as hell but I was determined to keep my game face on while dealing with him. Tom asked Sam to show us around while he called to check on an order of supplies that hadn’t been delivered. “Let’s get to it!” Sam said leading the way outside. It was hard not to stare at his plump ass as we walked down the stairs; it would be just my luck to trip and fall flat on my face. I was impressed with the work that was already underway. I recognized the houses from our stock blueprints but

Christopher Beckwith realized they were slightly different. As if he was reading my mind, Sam explained that they increased the dimensions to give the appearance of a bigger house. “People like things bigger down here in Texas!” he said with a wink. As tempted as I was, I decided not to dwell on the idea of ‘bigger’ any further. After touring of the development, Sam suggested we use the site trailer to work on the drafts since that would give us a break from the noise and the heat. We ran into Tom on the way back to the trailer. He told Sam that he needed him to talk to a subcontractor about the underground wiring that was running behind schedule. “Can y’all find your way back?” he asked. “Yeah Tom, I can see the trailer from here,” Steve said. I wanted to get as much done as possible so we could relax for the rest of the evening. There was no denying we were on the same page because Steve started on the drafts as soon as we were inside. My phone rang while I waited for my laptop to power up. I figured I should answer since the call was from the 713 area code. “Hey Ron, it’s Tom. I have to go check on the progress at another development. I probably won’t make it back so Sam is gonna take y’all back to the hotel when you’re finished.” It was a struggle to keep my smile under wraps. I was more than game to chill with Sam even if it was just for a ride back to the hotel. I thanked Tom and said, “I really appreciate you looking out for us.” “Don’t mention it, that’s what I’m here for!”

What’s in in it for me? Steve had finished the drafts and was surfing the internet for a somewhere to hang out. I hoped he would come up with something so I wouldn’t feel guilty about ditching him. With his eyes glued to the screen, he said, “You gotta see this; it says no visit to Houston is complete without coming there!” I walked over to take a look hoping I could convince him that I was interested. After the thong-clad girls, I saw a caption that read, ‘Home of the fattest asses in Texas!’ Steve said, “Makes my dick jump just thinking about it!” It was all I could do to keep from rolling my eyes. “Sounds like the place to be!” he said. “You down?” I thought, ‘Okay, here we go.’ “Damn, it sounds like fun but I promised my aunt I’d go to church with her for some kind of rally.” “Man, you gon’ pass up honies to go to church?” “I don’t want to but if I back out I’ll never hear the end of it.” “So I guess that means the room is all mine! Remember, what happens in Houston stays in Houston, right?” ‘Man, you’re preaching to the choir!’ I thought. Instead, I said, “Yeah Steve, the room is all yours.” Sam was covered in sweat when he walked in; he looked even taller and sexier than before. I had to bite my tongue to avoid saying, ‘Damn!’ “So y’all ‘bout ready to head out?” he asked. “Yeah, I’ve done all I’m gonna do today!” Steve said. Sam responded, “Good, I’m hungry as hell!” I was hungry too so he definitely had my attention when he asked if we were in the mood for barbeque. I quickly said, “Sam, you must be reading my mind.”

Christopher Beckwith Then he turned to Steve and asked, “What about you?” “Hell yeah!” Steve barked. “I heard y’all can burn down here in Houston!” Sam’s smile widened as he said, “Good, let’s go eat!”

What’s in in it for me?

Seven So what y’all gon’ have?

he hickory scent seeping into the truck as Sam sped toward the restaurant caused my hunger to kick into overdrive. It was the kind of aroma that could make you stop even if you hadn’t planned to. The red barn-shaped building had a welcoming sign that read, ‘Pig’s Heaven Bar-Bee-Que’. Everything about the restaurant screamed good ol’ down-home cooking; just the sight of the building made my stomach rumble. Sam said, “They have the best ribs in Houston so there’s gonna be a wait but it’s worth it!” He was right about the wait; the benches out front were jam-packed with the other patrons standing nearby. It was sheer luck that Sam spotted the reverse lights of a car backing out when he pulled in. Once the car was gone, he whipped into the space with the skill of a NASCAR driver. “Now that’s what I call luck!” Sam said. There was no question that Sam was hungry; I couldn’t help wondering if he was even sexier when he ate. “I’ll go in and put my name on the waiting list,” he said. Steve replied, “Cool, that’ll give me time for a smoke.” “Okay, be right back,” Sam said before heading inside. As Steve lit his cigarette, I said, “Man, I hope the food is as good as Sam says.”

Christopher Beckwith He agreed adding, “It looks like most of the customers are White; you know barbeque is a Black thing!” It was hard not to laugh; I never would have said that out loud but I was thinking the same thing. Pulling a cigar from his pocket as he walked out of the restaurant, Sam said, “I think I’ll join you Steve.” I was instantly turned on as he wrapped his lips around the cigar. It was driving me crazy to watch him suck the tip into his mouth. “So how long is the wait?” Steve asked. After exhaling a thick cloud of smoke, Sam said, “About twenty minutes.” Just thinking about the wait made my stomach growl; I couldn’t imagine waiting so long while being tortured by the amazing aroma. I was thankful for the distraction when Sam asked how long we had worked at Brandon Properties. “I’ve been there about five years,” Steve said. Then Sam asked, “What about you Ron?” I tried not to think about my hunger as I told him I had been working there about nine years. “I guess you fellas know your stuff!” Sam said flipping us a thumbs up. I thought it was corny; adorable but corny. All of a sudden, we heard, “Hamilton, party of three.” Sam snuffed out his cigar as he said, “That’s us!” When we walked in, it seemed like we had stumbled on the set of the television show Hee Haw. There were collectibles of everything country everywhere in sight. The hostess pleasantly asked, “Hamilton party?” Sam quickly answered, “That’s us!” She picked up three menus and said, “Your table is right

What’s in in it for me? this way.” A sly grin covered Steve’s face as we followed her to our table. She had on the tightest jeans ever and Steve noticed. He nudged me and said, “Man, look at that tail!” “Like that, huh?” Sam chuckled. Steve quickly responded, “Damn skippy!” The hostess stopped at a table and asked, “Is this okay?” Sam looked to us for confirmation. Steve said, “Fine with me.” I agreed so we took our seats. “Your server will be with you shortly,” the hostess said. Steve’s eyes followed the supple ass back to the front of the restaurant. “That’s what I’m talking about!” he said. “Sounds like you’ve got something besides food on your mind,” Sam teased. “Oh, I’m hungry; I’m just enjoying the view!” We were looking over the menu when our waitress appeared. She was a middle-aged woman with a missing tooth and red hair pulled up in an architectural structure that even I would envy. “Howdy!” she said with the finesse of a southern belle. “Hey Janie,” Sam replied. “You ready to take care of my hungry friends?” “Yes sir!” she sang out. “So what y’all gon’ have?” I had a taste for ribs but Sam jumped in before I could speak up. He eagerly said, “I wanna make sure they get the good stuff so I’ll order.” Janie responded, “All right sweetie, shoot!” “We’ll have two slabs of ribs, a basket of smoked wings, the family-sized potato salad, a basket of onion rings...” Steve interrupted, “Man, I don’t do onion rings!”

Christopher Beckwith “Okay, add fries for the city boy, a family order of baked beans and, of course, some of that good iced tea.” Flashing her toothless grin, Janie said, “You got it, Bud!” Sam assured us we were in for a treat. “This barbeque is so good it’ll make you wanna slap yo’ mama!” “Damn, it must be good,” Steve said. “Nobody slaps my mama and gets away with it!” Our laughter drew stares from the other tables as Janie returned with the tea and a basket of fresh-baked bread. “Don’t fill up on that bread,” she said. “Y’all got a lot of good food on the way!” Steve took a roll from the basket as Janie turned to check on another table. “Sam you must eat here a lot,” he said. “At least twice a week; I just can’t stay away!” I wondered if Sam had a wife and kids since he wasn’t wearing a wedding ring so I asked if his family liked eating there as much as he did. “Not anymore,” he said casually. “I got a divorce about three years ago.” ‘Mm hmm,’ I thought even though I didn’t dare press the issue any further. Steve couldn’t resist asking, “So I guess that frees you up for all these sexy ladies, huh?” “Let’s just say I’m content,” Sam chuckled. I saw Janie headed our way with the food and was glad Steve would have something to keep his mouth occupied. “Y’all ready to eat?” she asked with a sweet grin. Tucking his napkin in his shirt collar, Sam replied, “You know it!” I tried not to laugh thinking how much he looked like a big kid; a big sexy kid!

What’s in in it for me? There wasn’t much conversation as we slurped on the meaty bones; they were just too good to waste time talking. Down to three bones on the platter, I said, “I’m done!” Steve sighed, “Yeah, me too!” Sam released a belch then chuckled, “Excuse me y’all.” Steve laughed as he admitted, “That’s okay Sam; I might have one on the way!” Then Sam asked, “So, what’s the game plan for the first night in Houston?” “I came across a club on the internet that claims to have the fattest asses in Texas,” Steve said. “I gotta check it out!” “Oh, you must be talking about Platinum; they do have some sweet tail up in there!” Reality set in as my fantasy of Sam died a sudden death. That’s when he asked, “So Ron, are you going too?” “Naw, I promised my aunt I’d go to church with her.” “What’s the name of the church?” he asked. ‘Okay, I’m really stuck now,’ I thought. He preempted my blunder adding, “I can drop you off if it’s on my way home.” It sounded good but where would he drop me off? I cautiously said, “I don’t know the name of the church; I’ll have to call her when we get to the hotel.” “Cool!” Sam said. “So, y’all ‘bout ready to go?” My bulging stomach confirmed I was done. It was clear that the feeling was mutual when Steve said he couldn’t eat another bite. Janie came right over as Sam waved to get her attention. “So, did y’all enjoy the food?” she asked. I was quick to respond, “Janie, it was delicious!” “So I guess y’all are ready for some dessert, huh?”

Christopher Beckwith Sam breathlessly asked, “Where am I gonna put it, in my back pocket?” We laughed as we nodded in agreement. “Well, if y’all are ready I’ll go get the check,” Janie said. I saw Steve looking around and figured he was trying to find the cute hostess. I chuckled thinking he was determined to push up on something while he was in Houston. Sam reached for his wallet and said, “It’s on me fellas.” I told him not to bother because we could expense it. “I’ll charge it to Tom’s corporate account!” he insisted. Steve didn’t hesitate to say, “Sounds good to me!” I suggested we take care of the tip since Sam was treating so Steve put a five dollar bill on the table. Since Janie was so nice, I placed a five on top of his. Janie returned with the check, wet naps and a few mints. She thanked us and said, “Y’all come back, ya’ hear!” Sam’s big grin assured her that he’d be back. “I’d love to come back but we’re visiting from Atlanta,” Steve said. Janie responded, “Well, enjoy your stay and have a safe trip home.” Just as she was about to walk away, I asked if the young lady that showed us to our table was still at work. “If you mean Wanda, she had to go pick up her kids.” There was no mistaking Steve’s disappointment. “Man, I guess it’s just not your day,” I teased. He fired back, “Well, the day ain’t over yet!” I chuckled, “If I know you Steve, the day is over and the night is just getting started.”

What’s in in it for me?

Eight Coming clean teve said he would take a shower while I called my aunt. The way he went on and on about Platinum in the truck confirmed that he was more than ready to hit the streets to see what Houston’s night life had to offer. I figured there were sodas in the mini bar so I asked Sam if he wanted something to drink. “No, I’ll just wait until I get home to have a cold one.” Fishing for an invitation, I said, “Man, a cold one sounds good!” I figured it was worth a shot. “But aren’t you going to church with your aunt?” The sound of running water and Steve’s off-key singing let me know I was free to talk so I said, “I have a confession.” Sam cautiously asked, “Okay Ron, what is it?” “I don’t have family here; I’m just not in the mood to go to a strip club.” With a slight laugh, Sam said, “Yeah, it can get old after a while.” Then he asked, “Do you shoot pool?” I sighed, “A little but I’m not very good at it.” “That’s too bad Ron; I was gonna take you to one of my favorite places. It’s called Dave’s and they’ve got cold drafts, flat screen TV’s and practically a hundred pool tables.” I laughed trying to envision what a hundred pool tables would look like. Then I realized I’d be crazy not to take Sam

Christopher Beckwith up on the offer. I was sure I could suffer through a couple of games of pool if it meant spending more time with him so I said, “Okay, I’m in.” “Good, we’ll drop Steve off then head on over to Dave’s. You think he’ll mind taking a taxi back to the hotel?” “He’s trying to get laid tonight so he’ll be fine.” Steve peeked out of the bathroom and asked if I’d gotten in touch with my aunt. “Yeah, we got it all worked out. Sam said he could drop you off at the club since it’s on the way.” “Cool!” he said ducking back into the bathroom. Sam chuckled, “Ron, you sure are a piece of work man!” I smiled and said, “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

What’s in in it for me?

Nine This Bud’s for you!

ave’s was located in a row of storefronts in an older area of town. There were lots of neon beer signs in the windows and a spotlight aimed at a sign above the door that read ‘Dave’s Pool Palace’. “Let’s get inside Ron; they’ve got a couple of cold Bud’s waiting with our names on ‘em.” Dave’s was larger than it looked from outside. The jukebox was blazing, the bar was buzzing with patrons ordering drinks, ESPN lit up the wall-mounted televisions and almost every pool table was occupied. Sam’s hangout didn’t actually have ‘a hundred’ pool tables but it seemed like it did. “So Ron, what’s your pleasure?” Sam asked. ‘If only you knew!’ I thought before deciding to tell him I was in the mood for a cold draft instead. “Well, let’s see if we can make you happy!” As we headed for the bar, Sam shouted, “Hey Pops!” “Hey Sammy,” the bartender responded in a rusty voice. Pops was an older man with bushy salt and pepper hair and red suspenders that settled on the sides of his belly. His eyes were weary but his grin was no indication of his fatigue. “It’s been over a week, where ya’ been?” Pops asked. “I’ve been working like crazy at our new development.” Pops joked, “A job is a good thing to have these days!”

Christopher Beckwith Laughing, Sam admitted, “Don’t I know it!” Then Pops asked, “So who’s your friend?” “This is Ron; he’s here from Atlanta helping us out with some changes were making at the subdivision.” Pops shook my hand and welcomed me to Houston. I thanked him adding, “Nice place you got here.” “I’m glad you like it,” he said. “So what can I get y’all to drink?” Sam told Pops he was having a Bud then asked what I was drinking. I glanced at the taps and said, “Make it two!” “Coming right up!” Pops replied with a wink. Then Sam asked, “So Ron, what had you planned to do if I hadn’t come along?” “I was gonna walk around and take in the sights; maybe have a beer somewhere then head back to the hotel.” “That doesn’t sound like much fun,” he said. I was planning to find one of Houston’s gay night spots but I couldn’t tell him that so I said, “I’m glad we came here; this is better than what I had in mind.” “Well, I don’t want you to be bored on your first night.” “Sam to the rescue!” I teased. Pops put a couple of frosty mugs on the bar as he said, “There ya’ go fellas, the coldest Buds in town!” “Watch out for that first sip,” Sam said. “We don’t want you to get a brain freeze.” I boyishly replied, “Okay Sam, I’ll be careful!” “Cheers!” he said as we tapped our mugs with a ‘clank’. Sam took a deep chug then asked how I liked Houston. I tried to answer but my brain was paralyzed after swallowing the frigid brew. They were right; it had to be the coldest beer

What’s in in it for me? I’d ever had. I was finally able to say, “I haven’t seen much of the city yet but it seems like a nice place.” The pride in Sam’s voice was unmistakable as he said, “I like to think so; I want you to leave with a good impression of Houston so I’ll consider it my duty to make sure you have a good time.” I playfully replied, “Okay Sam, the job’s yours!” After another sip, he asked if I was ready to shoot some pool. I really wasn’t but I knew I’d have to play him sooner or later. I sighed, “I guess so man; I told you I’m not very good.” “Let me be the judge of that,” he said with a wink. Sam located a table then dropped in a couple of quarters releasing the balls with a thunderous roar. He grabbed two pool cues and said, “Ron, I’ll rack ‘em and you can break.” My first shot caused a loud clatter as balls rolled wildly over the table. Just my luck, not one dropped in a pocket. He snickered, “You really do suck at this game, huh?” I didn’t hesitate to say, “I warned you!” Sam sized up his first shot and effortlessly sank the ‘six’ and the ‘three’ solid balls in the corner and side pockets. I grunted, “Damn, a brotha’s got skills!” “Watch a master at work!” he said with a sly smile. His second shot dropped the ‘two’ ball in a side pocket. I just stood there as he went to the far end of the table for his next shot. With the accuracy of a pool shark, I’ll be damned if he didn’t sink the ‘seven’ ball too. “I guess I won’t need this,” I said leaning my cue against the wall as I studied the table crowded with striped balls. Sam chuckled, “Don’t give up; the game’s not over yet!”

Christopher Beckwith He winked at me as he set up his next shot then dropped the ‘one’ ball in the side pocket. Sam noticed my smirk and said, “Man, that was a lucky shot!” My response was a sarcastic, “Um!” Sam set his sights on the ‘five’ ball. After taking careful aim, he missed the shot that bumped against the rail just to the left of the center pocket. “Damn!” he said in a weak attempt at sounding upset. “Don’t play me; you missed that shot on purpose!” “How can you say that Ron?” he asked trying his best to sound innocent. “That was a hard shot!” “Whatever!” I grunted. Sam tried to hold back his laughter but it was no use. “I believe it’s your shot,” he said reaching for his beer. I was determined to sink at least one ball so I scanned the table for the easiest shot I could find. I lined up a shot at the striped ‘six’ ball sitting near the corner pocket and let it rip. It was dead on lazily tapping the ball into the pocket but my triumph was short-lived as the cue ball also rolled in. Sam doubled over with laughter then struggled to tame it once he realized I wasn’t laughing with him. I sneered, “So you think that’s funny, huh?” “Yeah man, I do!” he confessed. After he put the cue ball at the far end of the table, Sam’s shot slammed the ‘four’ ball in the corner pocket. Adding insult to injury, the cue ball rolled back tapping the ‘five’ ball into the side pocket. He stood back from the table and said, “I hate to get in that ass but this game is done!” Realizing I’d gotten my ass kicked, I reached for my beer and grudgingly said, “Go ahead man, take your victory!”

What’s in in it for me? Sam finished the game by sinking the ‘eight’ ball in the corner pocket. “Ready to get spanked again?” he asked as he reached in his pocket for more quarters. Without thinking, I snapped, “Man, you’d love to spank me wouldn’t you?” I was hoping my sarcasm outweighed the sexual nuance as I suggested we have another beer. Sam quickly responded, “I’m in!” “Okay, this round is on me,” I said. I didn’t know how to respond when he asked if I was in a hurry to get back to the hotel. I was having a good time and wasn’t ready to get dropped off. When I asked why, he said, “I’d rather go to my place if we’re gonna have another beer. I don’t live far from here and I have plenty to drink.” Running the risk of ruining ‘the date’, I said, “But you’d have to take me all the way back to the hotel.” “Not a problem; I live alone and I’d like the company.” I figured, ‘What the hell, another beer would be nice.’

Christopher Beckwith

Ten Going Platinum teve was filled with anticipation as he rushed across the parking lot. There was a bright neon sign that read, ‘Platinum Gentlemen’s Club’ adding a punch of color to the front wall of the windowless building. There was a glass door etched with a woman’s silhouette and the word ‘Platinum’ tucked under a pink awning. It was the gateway to bliss, or at least he hoped it was. ‘So far, so good,’ he thought. A mammoth bouncer dressed in all black with the word ‘Security’ in white letters across his shirt stopped Steve at the door. “I need your ID,” he said flatly. After handing over his driver’s license, Steve was frisked then instructed to see the woman waiting at the admissions counter. Her sleek frame was wrapped in a red halter and black form-fitting pants; the body glitter that dusted her skin sparkled in the red spotlight. She extended her hand as she sharply said, “The cover is twenty dollars!” Steve fumbled through his wallet then pulled out a one hundred dollar bill. In a more receptive tone, the woman said, “Welcome to Platinum big spender!” In an attempt at small talk, he asked why she was hiding

What’s in in it for me? behind the cash register. “It’s my brother’s club and he don’t trust none of these bitches with his money!” she responded. Trying to sound sexy, Steve asked “So gorgeous, what’s your name?” Handing him his change, she said, “Unavailable, now go on inside and enjoy your evening!” He laughed about the snub as he pulled the heavy door open. He was impressed with Platinum’s stylish décor; there were butter soft leather sofas in the lounge and his feet were cushioned by the plush carpet as he walked to the glass block bar. Steve noticed a porno playing on the television mounted behind the bar. Briefly overcome by the action on the screen, he decided it was time for a drink. He took a seat on a barstool as he waved to get the bartender’s attention. She was well-toned with a complexion the hue of honey. Her ponytail shimmered in the flashing lights as it danced against the sleek skin peeking from her backless patent leather dress. Her legs, wrapped in fishnet stockings, were finished with black stilettos. She offered Steve a smile as she came over and asked, “So sexy, what are you drinking?” He marveled at her generous breasts reflecting on memories of the water-filled balloons he played with as a child. Snapping out of his trance, he said, “Vodka tonic.” “Would you like that with Absolut?” “Absolutely!” he replied with a wink. Placing her hand on top of his, she said, “You got it!” As she made his drink, Steve noticed how luscious her body was. Her small waist rested on top of her supple hips

Christopher Beckwith while her shapely ass was nestled in the gleaming dress. He mindlessly caressed the growth in his pants as his head was filled with an image of her legs wrapped around his back. She put the drink on the bar and said, “It’s thirteen.” “Dollars!” jumped from Steve’s lips. She laughed as she said, “Trust me baby, it’s worth it!” “Let’s hope so,” he said handing her a twenty. The first sip slid past his tongue sending a rush through his bloodstream. He was less concerned with the cost once he realized how strong the drink was. Steve asked what her name was adding, “I like to know my bartender on a first name basis.” “I’m Nikki, and you are?” “My name is Steve,” he said before taking another sip. “So Steve, what brings you to Platinum?” “I’m in town on business and I didn’t want to spend the night stuck in my hotel room so here I am.” “Well, you’ll have a lot more fun here with us,” she said before turning to take another order. Steve decided to look around to see what Platinum had to offer so he blew Nikki a kiss leaving the change as a tip. He was ambushed by the blinding lights and deafening music but his eyes and ears quickly adjusted. He noticed the tables positioned along the railing that bordered the sunken entertainment area but the sparse activity paled compared to the lively environment on the lower level. A dancer clung to the brass pole on the stage while the other performers provided lap dances for the eager patrons. At that point, he was determined to sit in the exclusive den. Steve was stopped by a guard on duty at the entrance to the pleasure pit. He was as big as the bouncer out front and

What’s in in it for me? wearing the same black ‘Security’ tee shirt. “You want a table on the floor?” the guard barked. Steve cautiously answered, “Yeah man.” The guard grunted, “It’s twenty dollars!” Steve handed over a twenty trying to keep track of how much money he had spent. The guard wrapped his wrist with a blue band that identified his elevated status as a baller. Moving the velvet rope, he said, “Have a good time.” Steve waded through the crowd pausing to enjoy the lap dance of another patron. The guy shot him a harsh look so he figured he should keep it moving. Looking around, he was relieved to find a vacant table at the far end of the stage. He didn’t want someone else to get it so he quickly made his way over. He was enticed by the show at the next table where two guys took turns showering a dancer with fives as she taunted them by clapping her ass cheeks. The sight caused his meat to stir as he remembered the website’s quote of ‘…the fattest asses in Texas’. The growing commotion of the birthday celebration at another table grabbed Steve’s attention. There was a group of Omega Psi Phi frat brothers chanting: ‘Tear da club up! Tear da club up! Tear da club up!’ The DJ immediately responded over the mic: ‘Get them dollars out! Get them dollars out!’ Steve focused on the dancers smearing each other with the half-eaten birthday cake. The fraternity brothers cheered as the birthday boy licked the cake from their breasts. Steve couldn’t help smiling as he realized how happy the guy was from all the lusty attention.

Christopher Beckwith They grew louder as the waitress approached their table with a tray of drinks. Some barked while the others rooted: ‘Ova here Shawty! Ova here Shawty! Ova here Shawty!’ She moved with the grace of a prize-winning mare. Her thigh-high boots struggled to lengthen her short legs but that had no affect on her stride as she navigated the crowd. Steve waved to get her attention. She acknowledged him with a nod then turned back to the rowdy crew to collect her money. As she put it away, a few of them surrounded her in an effort to keep her to themselves. She tucked the empty tray under her arm and snapped, “Honey, I got customers!” before pushing past the barricade. Steve offered the waitress a smile as she approached. She dryly said, “I’m Ivory, what can I get for you?” It was all he could do not to laugh at the irony because her complexion was as dark as chocolate. “I’m drinking Absolut and tonic so let’s do that again.” He thought about making a trip to the ATM after taking a mental tally of how much cash he had left. He didn’t want to run the risk of loosing his table so he asked if she would hold it while he went to get some cash. “Oh no sweetie but I can give you cash back if you use your credit card.” “Cool, let’s do it!” he said. In the same flat tone, Ivory asked, “How much cash?” He handed over his card and said, “A hundred dollars.” “Good answer sweetie!” she said in a lighter tone. Steve was starting to wonder if his trip to Platinum was worth it. He’d already spent sixty dollars and the only thing he had to show for it was a slight buzz. And then there was the DJ’s constant coaxing to tip the dancers. Steve wasn’t op-

What’s in in it for me? posed to spending money for a table dance but none of the dancers had approached him yet. He flinched when he suddenly felt a tap on his shoulder then turned to see a woman dressed in a French maid’s outfit complete with a duster. “Bonjour,” she purred in a forced French accent. “Would you like Fee Fee to clean up for you?” He flashed a devilish grin and said, “Oui, oui Madame!” She seductively shifted her hips while dusting his arms, his chest and then his stomach. Arriving at Steve’s groin, Fee Fee prolonged the dusting motion on his lap swirling the tips of the feathers against his stirring manhood. Then she turned around and bent over revealing her exposed ass. He was so caught up that he didn’t notice Ivory had returned with his drink. In a tone of servitude, she said, “Your drink Sire.” Falling in line with the role play, Steve responded, “Yes, my lady!” His response drew a smile from her once taut lips. She stated, “Your wish is my command,” as she handed Steve the receipt and a stack of ten dollar bills. Fee Fee sat on Steve’s lap as he tipped Ivory with a ten. A smile graced her lips once she felt his bulge flex under the pressure of her bare ass. “I see somebody’s ready to play,” she said rubbing her exposed bottom against his swelling lump. He slyly responded, “You could say that.” “Well, we have a room in the back for guests like you.” Steve flexed his stiff organ and said, “Tell me more.” Fee Fee ran a finger along his ear as she explained, “We call it Eden. It’s a cozy place for guests that want to relax.”

Christopher Beckwith He caressed the small of her back as he asked, “So what would it take for me to spend some time in Eden?” She whispered, “It’s forty to go in; more to go deeper.” ‘JACKPOT!’ Steve thought as the sound of slot machines rang out in his head. “Is it all right if I bring my drink?” Trailing her manicured nails along the base of his neck, she said, “Of course baby!” He put four bills on the table then tucked the rest in his pocket. Fee Fee picked up the money then led Steve to a door near the stage. He was really enjoying the view of Fee Fee’s cheeks peeking from the ruffled skirt. Then he felt a rush as he tried to imagine what Eden would be like. Eden’s layout revealed just enough action to entice him. The dimly lit room was divided into little alcoves with bedlike platforms creating semi-private retreats. Steve could see the silhouettes of bodies displaying various acts of pleasure. The erotic moans filling the room fueled his desire as Fee Fee led him to their destination. Guiding him back on the plush surface, she seductively asked, “Are you comfortable?” Steve replied, “Never better!” Fee Fee knelt in front of Steve as she rubbed his trapped bulge. She undid his belt, lowered his zipper then pushed his pants to the floor. Her soothing touch brought a smile to his face as she pulled his rod through the opening of his boxers. After a soft smile, she kissed the tip before introducing it to the back of her throat. The warmth of Fee Fee slurping on Steve’s beefy log was driving him crazy. She massaged his nipples as his head fell back from the oral service that her skilled lips provided. Minutes turned to seconds as Steve’s veins and vessels

What’s in in it for me? pulsed in a battle to prolong his mounting ecstasy. His hips humped upward seeking more of the blissful service. As he raced toward the finish line, Steve was pissed that the more he struggled, the harder it was to remain in control. “Oh shit!” he barked as his fluids surged from his loins. It was hard for Fee Fee to swallow as Steve flooded her eager mouth. Falling back in what seemed like slow motion, Steve was cradled by the pillows as his heart pumped wildly. Drifting back to reality, all he could think about was getting a taxi.

Christopher Beckwith

Eleven A house is definitely a home

he night grew darker with each mile as we drove to Sam’s house. It seemed to take forever but it didn’t matter, I was kicking it with Sam instead of playing it straight at a strip club. I teased, “You’re out here, huh?” “You could say that. We bought the house after we got married so I decided to keep it when my wife moved back to Birmingham.” It wasn’t long before Sam was pulling up to the house. It was a brick ranch with a manicured lawn and carriage lights lining the driveway; not your typical bachelor pad. He pulled into the garage, cut the ignition and said, “I hope my house meets your standards.” “It’s nice Sam, I love older brick homes.” I choked back my laughter thinking how ‘gay’ that sounded. He asked me to lock the door when we walked in then went to the refrigerator to get a couple of Budweisers. Handing one to me, he said, “Nothing beats a cold Bud!” I followed him to the den and sat on the sofa. Sam was about to sit in the recliner then stopped and said, “I need to take a leak; see if you can find something on TV.” I picked up the remote and surfed channels until I came across a Georgia Tech basketball game on Classic ESPN. I get

What’s in in it for me? a kick out of watching the players running around in those skimpy shorts so I left it. Sam walked by the recliner and sat next to me. His belt was undone and there was no mistaking the lump lying on the side of his leg. I wanted to pretend I hadn’t noticed but he was staring at me staring at him. “So Ron, you like college basketball?” I simply responded, “Yeah, but I like the pros better.” “Me too,” he replied. Sam turned his beer up then sat back and grabbed his bone. I tried to keep my eyes on the screen but I couldn’t help noticing the growth expanding beyond the cover of his hand. “It’s just not the same around here since my divorce,” he said. “I like having time to myself but I miss my kids.” “I guess the peace and quiet can be a blessing,” I joked. “Yeah, but it gets old after a while,” he said. “That’s why I invited you over; I could use the company.” I tried to ignore his caressing hand as I guzzled my beer. That’s when I noticed him glance over to see if I was looking. “Ron, why don’t you crash here? I can take you back to the hotel in the morning.” I was thrown off by the suggestion. I wanted to stay but I was afraid it might turn out to be more drama than it was worth. Hoping to sound gracious, I said, “That’s nice Sam but I don’t wanna impose.” “Well Ron, you’d actually be doing me a favor,” he said. “I really don’t feel like driving back downtown.” It was a cozy house so I didn’t mind staying the night. I was also curious to see how our sleepover would turn out so

Christopher Beckwith I told him I was sure he had somewhere I could sleep. He casually said, “I was hoping you’d sleep with me.” Sam leaned in close enough for me to feel the heat from his skin. When I didn’t move, he planted a kiss on my lips. I pulled back for a second then returned the kiss; that’s when his tongue slid past my lips. His knot was straining for release from its denim prison when he broke the kiss. He gently brushed his thumb over my lips without warning making the decision to stay even easier. He pushed his jeans to the floor exposing his boxers. The cotton struggled to contain the beast that was begging to be introduced to my mouth. The aroma rising from his groin lulled me in until my lips connected with the burgundy dome easing from its loving foreskin. He dropped his boxers and allowed his rod to spring free glossing my lips with the syrupy drop that settled at the tip. My tongue impulsively slid out to savor the flavor Sam left behind. I couldn’t believe my luck; I was stuck on him all day and now I had him all to myself. “Ron, give me a minute to take a shower, okay?” He was gone before I could respond. I sat there speechless then I started laughing; it was exactly what I wanted but I still couldn’t believe it was happening. I wasn’t sure what to make of the situation then I wondered if I was getting into something I’d regret. My worries faded once the shower was replaced by the smooth sounds of Najee. Sam called out, “Ron, come join me.” My heartbeat eclipsed the sound of the sweet jazz floating from the bedroom. I tried to catch my breath as I moved

What’s in in it for me? zombie-like to the rear of the house. A flicker of candlelight spilled onto my path as I headed toward the bedroom. When I walked in, the atmosphere was enhanced by Sam wearing nothing but a smile. The candlelight shed a warm glow on his face as he motioned for me to come closer. Sam unbuttoned my shirt and slipped it past my shoulders and that’s when our lips became reacquainted. I felt a chill as I tried to make sense of that moment. I couldn’t tell if Sam was being considerate or devious when he asked if I was okay. Once I nodded, he responded, “That’s all I needed to hear!” I trembled from the warm sensation of Sam’s lips closing on my nipple. Then a rash of goose bumps covered my skin as he pacified my nipple’s neglected twin. Before I knew it, he was on his knees and my jeans were covering my shoes. My aching muscle was instantly engulfed in warmth as my buckling knees sent me crashing to the bed. Sam’s smile was almost sinister as he removed my shoes and tossed my jeans aside. Then he said, “Let’s go to bed.” I crawled under the covers where it seemed like I was drowning in the sheets. “Are you sure about this?” Sam asked as he joined me. “We can just chill if you want to.” I respected his valor but the piston springing from my lap was screaming for attention. I initiated a kiss that grew as the heat from his body washed over me like the evening tide. Sam squeezed my nipples as I started stroking my bone then sighed as he slid closer and matched my rhythm. My heart raced as I enjoyed the show. There was a smile in his eyes as he looked up at me while continuing to gnaw

Christopher Beckwith on my meat. It was hard to believe how fast I was reaching my peak; I wanted more of his warm mouth but the surge in my loins wouldn’t wait. Groans slipped from my lips as I pulled out and gave in to my body’s demands. It was clear that the sight of my twitching limb coughing up creamy drops enticed Sam as he erupted with a grunt. I was shocked when he kissed me. It was a relief that our vibe conquered the awkward anxiety that sometimes follows casual sex. “That was incredible!” I huffed as the kiss ended. He breathlessly added, “You can say that again!” “Okay, that was incredible!” I teased. Sam laughed as he pulled me closer. Moments later, we drifted off in each other’s arms.

What’s in in it for me?

Twelve Great day in the morning

woke up to the sweet sound of birds singing their morning melody. I looked around but I didn’t see Sam. Once my eyes adjusted, I noticed his shadow looming in the bathroom through the open door. Sam peeked out flashing that incredible smile as he said, “I see you finally decided to wake up.” I sprang up wondering what time it was. “Are you all right?” Sam asked. I anxiously said, “I gotta get to the hotel!” Puzzled, he asked, “What’s the big hurry?” “I’m not in a hurry but I didn’t tell Steve I was staying out all night.” “Okay Ron, what’s really going on between you two?” It was hard not to laugh as I said, “Steve is as straight as they come. It’s just that this is our first trip together and he doesn’t know I’m gay.” “Ron, Steve knows you’re gay!” he joked then laughed louder when I cut my eyes. “Just tell him your uncle dropped you off on his way to work. I’ll give you thirty minutes then swing by to pick y’all up.” “I guess that could work.” “I know it’ll work, now get in here and help Daddy get cleaned up,” he said before ducking back into the bathroom.

Christopher Beckwith I realized he was right; Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d just tell Steve I stayed at my auntâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s house to give him some privacy. And besides, Daddy was waiting!

What’s in in it for me?

Thirteen Back to life

he heavy traffic nearly doubled the time it took for us to drive to the hotel but Sam’s smile was far removed from the scowls of the other drivers battling the commute. It was funny that he seemed to have a way of making the best of any situation. “Ron, it really felt good to hold you last night,” he said. “I enjoyed the company man.” Laughing, I replied, “And the tongue bath in the shower wasn’t bad either!” “I aim to please!” he said with a wink. I couldn’t believe how everything turned out. I spent the night with a man that had plenty to offer and did so with no stress, no drama, no paranoia. Sam was secure with himself without feeling he had to shout it out to the world; he had it all figured out. All of a sudden, Sam was shaking my leg and telling me to wake up. I was surprised I drifted off so easily; I guess the plush seats were more comfortable than I thought or maybe it was just that easy to relax around him. Sam pulled over a couple of blocks from the hotel and asked if I was cool walking from there. I didn’t want to get out but I said, “Yeah, this is fine.” He rubbed my thigh adding, “Cool, I’ll see you soon.”

Christopher Beckwith With a wink, I replied, “Okay, it’s a date!” I climbed out of the truck then watched Sam pull away and take a right at the light. I was overcome by a rush of anxiety as I headed toward the hotel. I was hoping he was interested in more than a hook up but I had to remember I was going back to Atlanta. Steve was waiting for an elevator when I walked into the lobby. He was visibly disappointed that an overtly gay man had replaced the cutie that checked us in. Flashing a boyish grin, he said, “I guess lady luck was with one of us last night!” I tasted the lie waiting on my tongue as I told him the only luck I had was my aunt’s home cooking. He immediately barked, “Damn, what did she cook?” “She cooked fried pork chops, black eyed peas, macaroni and cheese, homemade biscuits and pound cake for dessert!” “Ron, how could you eat after all those ribs?” “My aunt’s cooking is so good I just couldn’t resist.” I was envious of the eggs, pancakes and sausage he told me he just finished in the restaurant. We didn’t have time for breakfast so food was the last thing I wanted to think about. “So do you think we’ll get finished today?” I asked. “I don’t know; I’m not through with Houston just yet!” I was glad we were on the same page; well, sort of.

What’s in in it for me?

Fourteen Fourteen Time to get to work! am was on his cell when we walked out of the hotel. I felt a rush of excitement as we headed toward the truck. I knew it was silly since he had just dropped me off but it wasn’t long before I got over it. “I’m picking them up now,” Sam said as we climbed in. “We’ll be there shortly.” After ending the call he said, “Good morning fellas.” Steve responded, “What’s up man?” I just smiled as I closed the door and buckled up. As we pulled off, Sam said, “That was Tom; I’m meeting him at one of our other developments after I drop you guys off. I’ll introduce y’all to Maria so she can give you her input on your designs.” I was disappointed that he had to leave. Then he flashed me a smile to assure me I had nothing to worry about. We arrived at the construction site in record time. Sam stopped at the site trailer, threw the truck in park and tapped the horn. A woman in tight Levis and a white ‘I love Houston’ tee shirt stepped out. Her silky shoulder-length hair had just a hint of curl at the ends and her warm eyes glistened in the sunlight. The Levis had just as much trouble containing her shapely ass as the shirt did confining her abundant tits.

Christopher Beckwith “Maria, I want you to meet Steve and Ron,” Sam said. “Guys, this is Maria.” “Good morning,” she greeted in a thick Spanish accent. I sensed Steve’s libido kick into overdrive as he reached for her hand and said, “Nice to meet you.” Maria responded, “It’s nice to meet you too; come inside and show me what you got!” I expected a devious comment but he just smiled. I wanted to say goodbye to Sam so I told them I needed to grab my laptop and I’d be right inside. Steve glanced over his shoulder sporting a grin that confirmed he was enjoying the view. Walking to the truck, I thanked Sam for being discrete. Shrugging his shoulders, he replied, “What choice did I have? I still have to work here after y’all leave.” Sam climbed in the truck as I reached for my laptop. “I’ll be with Tom most of the day so I probably won’t be back. I think he asked Maria to take y’all to the hotel.” “I’m glad he’s looking out for us,” I said even though I was frustrated that Sam wasn’t coming back. I was relieved when he asked, “Can I see you tonight?” My answer didn’t take much thought. “Works for me,” I said. “Where do you wanna meet?” “I can pick you up near the hotel where I dropped you off. I’ll give you a call when I’m on my way.” “Okay sexy, I’ll see you there!” I watched Sam speed off then headed for the site trailer. When I opened the door, the first thing I noticed was Maria’s ass bent over the desk as they studied a set of blueprints. “I like how you moved the bedrooms; there’s a lot more closet space now,” she said.

What’s in in it for me? Filled with pride, I told her the added space would help the bottom line because closets sell houses. “You’re right Ron; let’s go show the changes to Bill!” Once we were outside, Steve asked Maria what she liked to do for fun. With a snap of her fingers, she said, “I love to dance; it’s so much fun to work up a sweat on the dance floor!” Steve tried to impress Maria with his rusty dance moves as he replied, “That sounds like fun!” “Salsa music gets my juices flowing!” she squealed. Intrigued by the idea of Maria’s flowing juices, he said, “Now you’re talking! I may not understand the lyrics but the music is hot!” “Maybe you can show me your moves later. My favorite place is a Latin club called Caliente.” Steve was quick to ask, “Oh really?” “Yeah, they have the best Margaritas in town!” His smile widened as he said, “I’m in!” Maria called out for Bill as we walked through the open front door. “Over here Maria,” he shouted from the kitchen. Bill was a chunky, short man who also appeared to be Mexican. It looked like his shirt received more breakfast than his mouth and his jeans were dusty from the construction. I didn’t understand how a Mexican came by the name ‘Bill’ but I decided to just let it go. “Bill, this is Steve and Ron,” Maria said. He brushed his hands on his dusty jeans then reached out for a handshake. I laughed since that actually made his hands dirtier. “I want you to take a look at the changes,” Maria said. “I

Christopher Beckwith think they will work better than what we had in mind.” Bill replied, “Good, let me take a look.” Steve put his laptop on the counter and located the new drafts. “I reviewed the property grid and came up with a few ideas that could boost the development’s income potential.” Bill was pleased with the plans and said, “Let’s go take a look so we can see how your ideas will fit in.” Steve said he was sure he’d have more ideas once he got a look at the work that was already started. Maria led the way as she asked, “Ron, are you coming?” I was more interested in the framing so I said, “I think I’ll stay in here and look around for a while.” I stayed behind as Steve followed Maria and Bill outside. I was really impressed with the framing and made note of a few ideas that I could use on future projects. I was getting thirsty so I stepped outside to tell them I was going back to the trailer to get some water. “Okay,” Maria said. “We’ll meet you in a few minutes.” The blazing sun was doing a job on my thirst; it was as if my mouth became dryer with each step. The sweat kicked in about half way back to the trailer so I picked up my pace. My phone started ringing as I climbed the stairs. I was surprised when I saw Randy’s name on the display. He sang out, “Hey child, how’s Houston treating you?” “It’s more interesting than I expected,” I said casually. Randy played the cynic asking, “And why is that?” I playfully replied, “Let’s just say I’m enjoying myself!” I could imagine the smirk on his face as he asked, “Okay Ron, what’s his name?” “Now what makes you think my good mood is because of a man?”

What’s in in it for me? “Look bitch, I know you better than you know yourself,” he snapped. “Now what’s the nigga’s name?” “Well if you must know, his name is Sam; he works here at the construction site and yes, he’s fine as hell!” Randy grumbled, “I don’t believe this bitch has gone to Texas and met a construction worker!” I playfully added, “Yeah, I guess you could say that.” “Just tell me this Ron, did you get the dick yet?” Not surprised, I asked, “Is that all you think about?” “Now what do you think!” he snapped. “Well, I’ve had a smile on my face ever since we met.” Randy seemed a little irritated as he replied, “I guess I’ll have to play catch up at The Cock Pit tonight!” “So you’re going without me?” “Damn right, I didn’t tell you to take your ass to Texas!” Now that Sam was in the picture, clubbing was the last thing on my mind. I was glad that I wouldn’t have to spend the night in a smoke-filled room with a bunch of punks. His tone relaxed as he asked when I was coming home. “We’ve gotten a lot done so I should be back in a day or so; I don’t think it’ll be much longer than that.” “Make sure to give that construction worker something to remember before you come home!” “That’s the plan!” I chuckled. “I hope I’ll have a hot story for you when you get back!” “Remember, I’m not there to keep you out of trouble so be careful!” I teased. I laughed when he promised he’d try. Maria and Steve walked in just as I was saying goodbye. Their drenched faces proved Houston’s sun was also taking a toll on them.

Christopher Beckwith Steve poured a couple of cups of water and handed one to Maria as he said, “Here you go sweet pea.” She emptied the cup then said, “I see why you’re hiding in here Ron.” I joked, “Guilty as charged; there’s nothing like cool air and cold water!” She asked if we would mind staying at the site while she went home to freshen up for the club. “Maria, I’m good as long as I can stay in here where it’s cool!” I said. Steve agreed adding, “It’ll give me a chance to check my email while you’re gone.” “Okay, I’ll be back soon,” she said heading outside. Steve sighed, “Damn, that’s a fine one right there!” “Yeah, and she’s easy on the eye too!” A devilish grin invaded Steve’s face as he added, “I’ll be taggin’ that ass before the night is over son!” I chuckled, “Only time will tell.” “Yeah, and it won’t be soon enough for me!” “Speaking of taggin’ ass, how was Platinum?” Steve snapped out of his Maria-induced daze and said, “I didn’t think about it earlier and I’ve been caught up with Maria ever since.” “Well, she’s gone now so fill me in!” “Ron, it was a nice place but I spent too much money. I did get some fire head though!” That forced a ‘Say what!’ from my lips. “Man, they had a private lounge in the back called Eden; it was something to see!” “You mean like a sex room?” I squeaked. He chuckled, “That’s exactly what I mean.”

What’s in in it for me? “Well don’t leave me hangin’, tell me what happened!” “It all started when Fee Fee the French maid offered to dance for me. It wasn’t a typical lap dance, it was pretty hot! Then she invited me to chill with her in the lounge when the waitress brought my change, at a cost of course.” He laughed when I responded, “That’s not a surprise.” “We did a lot more than chill Ron; that trick swallowed every drop!” Without thinking, I shouted, “She did what!” “Yeah man, she had game!” I told him it sounded like his night was on point after all but his bravado faded as he told me there was more. “That skull was so good that I popped off in the first few minutes; she had skills!” “Not Steve the stud?” I chuckled. Nodding in agreement, he replied, “I was pissed man; I didn’t feel like I got my money’s worth!” “Well Steve, it happens to the best of us.” “Speak for yourself; I’m always on my game!” That’s when I said, “Maybe you’ll get a chance to rise to the occasion tonight.” “Damn right son, I know my soldier won’t let me down twice in a row!”

Christopher Beckwith

Fifteen ifteen Let’s get this party started

noticed Maria’s SUV blazing a path through the development followed by a blustery haze. After a screeching halt in front of the trailer, the cloud of dust finished a close second as it aimlessly coated the SUV. I said, “Steve, here comes your Latin hottie!” He rushed to the door but his pace slowed as he stepped outside. I wondered what was wrong so I joined him. Maria was headed in our direction wearing a wicked red dress; her confident stride said she was ready for a night out. Steve’s eyes were still locked on the SUV. I looked closer and noticed a man inside and realized he must have been the reason for the change in Steve’s mood. I asked, “So Maria, you brought along company?” “That’s my fiancé Miguel; he loves Caliente more than I do so I couldn’t leave him at home.” Steve’s wounded expression was priceless as he uttered, “I was hoping we could dance the night away.” Amused, Maria replied, “Oh, we will dance; I just hope you’re up to it!” Then Steve asked, “What about Miguel?” “He won’t mind, he’ll be too busy drinking Margaritas.” Steve shot me an evil look as I told her he was hoping to spend some special time with her.

What’s in in it for me? She chuckled, “That’s sweet but Miguel is my Papi.” Playing the Devil’s advocate, I said, “Maria, Steve might be having second thoughts about going to the club now.” “He won’t be lonely, my cousin Lena is going too!” I nudged him adding, “I’ll bet she’s a hottie, huh?” Before Steve could respond, Maria said, “Ron, he won’t be disappointed; she looks better than me!” “I’ll be the judge of that!” Steve grunted. Miguel hopped out of the truck and headed toward us. He was pudgy and bowlegged wearing the tightest jeans I’d ever seen on a man. His upper body was shaded by a huge cowboy hat and his boots landed solidly as he walked. Maria’s eyes sparkled as she wrapped her arm around his waist and said, “Miguel, this is Ron and Steve.” He tipped his hat and responded, “Nice to meet ya’!” “So, you guys ready to go?” she asked. Steve grumbled, “Yeah, just let me get my laptop.” I told them I needed to grab mine too as he brushed past me and went inside. Maria took Miguel’s hand as she said, “Okay, we’ll meet you guys in the truck.” Steve was standing at the desk literally waiting for me to walk through the door. He grumbled, “Man, can you believe that shit?” I couldn’t help laughing as I said, “Well, it is what it is!” “I just knew I was gonna hit that tonight!” he grunted. “Don’t forget about Lena,” I said. “You could be in for a wild night if she’s as hot as Maria says.” “Yeah right!” he huffed.

Christopher Beckwith

Sixteen Sixteen Time to roll out teve didn’t have much to say on the ride back to the hotel. He was intent on putting the moves on Maria but that wasn’t in the cards anymore. I was hoping Lena would be more than a conciliation prize. Maria asked, “So what do you guys think of Houston?” “It’s nice,” Steve muttered. Thinking of Sam, I added, “Yeah, I really like it.” I was caught off guard when she asked what we’d been doing for fun since we got to Houston. ‘Oh shit; she would ask that!’ “Sam took us out for barbeque yesterday,” Steve said. I jumped in adding, “…and dropped me off to meet my aunt and uncle.” “I’m sure they were glad to see you,” she said. “Yeah, it was good to see them too!” I was relieved that she didn’t press the issue since I was running out of details about my fictitious aunt and uncle. Miguel beamed with pride when I asked what he did for a living. “I pour concrete; Maria keeps me working!” he said. I laughed when Maria added, “Miguel needs to work to keep me happy!” He joked, “I do a good job; she is still with me!”

What’s in in it for me? Steve’s smirk was proof that he had no accolades for the happy couple. A smile came to Maria’s face when her phone suddenly rang. She glanced at Steve as she answered, “¡Hola Lena!” He tried to hold back his smile but there was no denying he was intrigued. “We’re going to the hotel now so they can get dressed,” Maria said. “We won’t be long.” Miguel flipped a thumbs up as he told Steve, “You’ll like Lena; she is very good-looking!” I thought he might get the wrong idea if I laughed at the corny gesture so I smiled instead. Maria told Lena that we’d see her at the club then ended the call. “Steve, Lena is ready to meet you,” she said. He responded, “That makes two of us!” Maria and Miguel decided to wait at the lobby bar while we got dressed. I was actually looking forward to going out with them. I figured it was the best way to avoid suspicions about my alternate plans and besides, it might be fun. In the room, Steve barked, “Hurry up Ron; I’m ready to meet Lena!” “I don’t know about you but I’m ready for a Margarita!” “Ron, the Margaritas sound good but I’m ready for some of that hot Latin pussy I keep hearing about!” Tickled by his confession, I said, “You never know; Lena just might be the one.” Stopping in his tracks, Steve huffed, “I’m not looking for love; I’m just trying to get some ass!”

Christopher Beckwith

Seventeen eventeen Quitting Quitting time

he status bar on Randy’s computer screen indicated 8:47 PM. He switched his phone to offline mode to avoid another call so close to quitting time. He had maxed out his tolerance for irate customers and couldn’t stop thinking about going to The Cock Pit. Randy decided to make a trip to the restroom; it was his preferred method of killing a few minutes of company time. After squeezing out a couple of drops, he considered staying home instead of going to the club alone. Then he figured, ‘Why not?’ There was no denying that he’d be bored camped out in front of the television and besides, it just might be his lucky night. He didn’t want to go without Ron because they always had fun enticing the strippers with the dollars they allotted for tipping. He was hoping he’d run into Richard and Bryan so he’d at least have someone to clown with. When he returned to his desk, he wasn’t surprised to see his micro-managing supervisor waiting. “The call log shows you’ve been offline for ten minutes,” Sarah said firmly. “Where were you?” He tried to conceal his aggravation as he replied, “I had to go to the restroom; I didn’t think it was a problem.” “Randy, you know we need as much phone coverage as

What’s in in it for me? possible at the end of the night; couldn’t it wait?” “I know Sarah but I really had to go.” She settled on a verbal warning and suggested he try to wait until quitting time in the future. Logging off of his computer, he sighed, “Okay, I’ll try,” then walked blindly past her and headed to the elevators. Once he was outside, he released a spine-chilling scream to ease his tension. He felt eyes locked on him and turned to see Tiffany and Sabrina stunned by his apparent meltdown. “Are you okay?” Sabrina asked as Tiffany looked on. His frustration faded as he said, “Yeah, I’m just pissed!” He rolled his eyes when Tiffany asked what was wrong. “It’s Sarah, she questioned me about taking a bathroom break so close to quitting time. I hate that bitch; she’s got to be the reddest redneck of all!” “I can’t stand that bitch either,” Tiffany said. “She wrote me up last week for coming back from lunch late.” Sabrina admitted, “I hardly ever get back from lunch on time so I guess I’m next.” Tickled, Tiffany asked, “Did I tell y’all about my dream the other night?” “No,” Randy and Sabrina sang out in unison. “I don’t know why I was dreaming about Sarah but the best part was when a homeless man pushed her in front of a MARTA train at Five Points. When the train pulled off, her severed head was yelling at me for being late!” The girls laughed hysterically as Randy mimicked Sarah falling in front of the train. Then Tiffany said, “I laughed so hard that I woke up my husband; he was still mad the next morning.” Randy wiped his eyes as he said, “Girl, you’re a mess!”

Christopher Beckwith Surprised to see the group as she stepped outside, Sarah said, “I thought y’all were gone; what’s so funny?” The laughter calmed as Sabrina said, “Randy was telling a joke. Sarah had no intention of prolonging the conversation so she replied, “Okay, I’ll see y’all tomorrow.” The girls choked back their laughter when Randy asked Sarah if she was taking MARTA. Baffled, Sarah said, “You know I just got a new truck.” “Oh, that’s right,” he replied through an empty smile. Their laughter returned once Sarah was in her truck. Randy said, “I can’t stand around here all night cackling with y’all hens; I’m on a mission baby!” “And where are you rushing off to?” Tiffany asked. He fired back, “Wouldn’t you like to know?” “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” Sabrina joked. Reaching for his keys, Randy snapped, “Baby, you aren’t capable of doing what I’m planning to do!” “I heard that!” Tiffany said causing them to laugh again.

What’s in in it for me?

Eighteen Eighteen It’s party time!

he atmosphere at Caliente was festive; the music was blazing and the drinks flowed freely. Everyone was dancing around and sipping colorful cocktails like it was some sort of Mexican holiday—the club definitely lived up to its name. Maria spotted Lena standing at the bar and waved to get her attention. There was no doubt that the Latin Goddesses were related; Lena was a knockout! She rushed over to hug Maria squealing, “¡Hola Mami!” After the hug, Maria said, “Guys, I want you to meet my cousin Lena.” “¡Hola!” Lena sang out through a beaming smile. Steve chuckled once he realized he was staring at her; he couldn’t believe how beautiful she was. Lena quickly asked, “Which one is my dance partner?” “This is Steve; he is dying to meet you!” Maria said. Grabbing Steve’s arm, Lena responded, “Jose is making Margaritas; I hope you like them frozen.” Steve replied, “Works for me!” Lena clung to Steve as we headed for the bar. His smile was a clear indication that things were looking up. “Jose, this is Steve and Ron,” Lena said to the bartender. “Guys, this is my brother Jose.”

Christopher Beckwith He put the pitcher of Margaritas on the bar, wiped his hands on the towel tucked in his jeans then reached out for a handshake. “I make us some real good Margaritas!” he said. Maria and Lena climbed on a pair of barstools while he poured the frosty blend into mugs for each of us. He raised his mug and toasted, “To new friends and old family—let’s drink!” Our Latin friends shouted, “¡Salud!” as we tapped mugs. Jose warned, “Don’t drink too fast or you get drunk!” He was definitely a character. Jose’s rushed speech and tiny stature reminded me of Speedy Gonzalez. He was young, in his twenties, short and thin. His deep eyes were enhanced by bushy eyebrows and his ponytail was pulled back above the close-cropped hair along the sides and back of his head. “So Jose, is this your club?” I asked. He shook his head as he responded, “No, no; I just work here! I hope I can have my own club someday but not now!” His animated personality made it hard not to laugh as I replied, “I’m sure it’ll work out.” As the music changed, Lena squealed, “I love this song!” “Then let’s do this!” Steve shouted. Lena jumped from her barstool and led Steve right in the middle of the fiesta on the dance floor. I laughed as Maria’s bouncing bottom indicated she was also moved by the song. “It looks like you’re ready to get out there too!” I teased. “Si, this is my favorite song Ron; come dance with me!” I wasn’t in the mood to dance so I said, “I think I’ll just sit here with Miguel and polish off this Margarita.” “Okay, but I can’t take it no more!” she shrieked. In a flash, Maria had joined Lena and Steve on the dance floor. I laughed at his attempt to handle both of them, it was

What’s in in it for me? simply hilarious. “So Miguel, how long have you been dating Maria?” He answered, “Almost two years; I know her since high school but I never had the cojones to ask her to go out.” “I guess you finally got up the nerve, huh?” He adamantly replied, “No, she asked me!” “Oh, so she made the first move?” “Yeah Ron, she wanted to go to the spring festival so she asked me to take her. I don’t think she liked me; she just had to find somebody to go with. We had so much fun, we date ever since.” “Ready for more?” Jose asked with a big grin. Filling our mugs before we could answer, he said, “Drink up and I make some more!” There was a sudden change in Miguel’s expression as I reached for my mug. He put his down without taking a sip so I asked if everything was okay. Miguel motioned toward the front of the club and asked, “Do you see the guy that just walked in?” I cautiously asked, “You mean the one in the red shirt?” “Si, that’s Lena’s ex boyfriend Raul. He give her trouble ever since she broke up with him.” Raul pushed through the crowd then grabbed Lena by the arm. Maria tried to step between them but Raul didn’t budge. I couldn’t make out what Lena was saying but she appeared to be telling Maria that everything was okay. The scuffle escalated as he tightened his grip. Lena tried to break free but Raul pulled her closer. In one fluid motion, she slapped him with all she had. Barely fazed by the blow, he returned the slap causing her head to snap. Her eyes filled with tears as she raised her hand to her cheek in disbelief.

Christopher Beckwith Steve grabbed Raul’s arm to pull him away but a quick swing sent him crashing to the floor. Maria lunged at Raul and grabbed a handful of his hair forcing him to release his grip on Lena. Jose jumped over the bar landing squarely on his feet. He raced to the dance floor with Miguel on his heels and in no time, they had Raul pinned to the floor. I cautiously made my way over once I was sure they had him under control. Lena caressed Steve’s face as she asked, “Are you okay?” Still a little dazed, he joked, “It’ll take more than a punch to get the best of ol’ Steve.” We helped him up as Maria yelled obscenities at Raul in Spanish. I felt my cell vibrating and prayed it was Sam. Sure enough, the phone’s display confirmed my prayers had been answered. I answered with a fraudulent, “Hello Unc!” “Hello to you too nephew,” he chuckled. “Are you about ready to get out of there?” Trying to keep our conversation private, I stepped away and told him I needed to make sure everything was okay. Sam cautiously asked, “What’s the problem?” “Steve’s face caught the wrong end of a fist!” I explained trying to make light of the situation. “What!” he snapped. “We were hanging out with Maria when her cousin’s ex came in and showed his ass!” “You mean Lena?” he asked. “Oh, so you know her?” “Yeah, she comes by the development to see Maria; now tell me what happened.” I told him that Raul was pushing Lena around and when

What’s in in it for me? Steve stepped in, Raul swung on him. Sam quickly asked, “So is Steve okay?” “Yeah, I think he’s more pissed than anything.” “It’s a good thing it’s only his ego that’s a little bruised.” I chuckled, “You’re right, it could have been worse.” “I’m down the block from your hotel; you ready to go?” “Yeah, I’ve had enough of this fiasco. I’ll come up with an excuse to leave once I’m sure everything is okay.” I saw a man pointing at Raul as two officers appeared at the entrance. They rushed over, handcuffed Raul and pulled him to his feet. I told Sam the police had arrived and I’d call him as soon as I knew what was going on. “Okay, I’ll drive around until I hear from you.” Steve was back at the bar so I went over to check on him. “So, you okay?” I asked. Trying to pull it together, he groaned, “Man, I’m good.” One of the officers came over and asked if he wanted to press charges. “It’s no big deal,” Steve replied. “I just wanna go back to my hotel.” Lena turned to Jose and pleaded, “Please don’t tell papa about this; he will kill Raul if he finds out!” “He will have to wait in line!” Jose huffed. I was relieved when Lena asked if I was ready to go. It was the perfect opportunity for my disappearance so I said, “Yeah, I’ve had enough excitement.” I turned to thank Maria for inviting me. “I’m sorry that crazy man ruined everything!” she said. “Maria, I’m just glad things didn’t get out of control.” I shook Miguel’s hand and told him it was nice meeting him. I noticed Jose was still angry so I put my arm around

Christopher Beckwith his shoulder and thanked him for the Margaritas. Trying to calm down, he said, “No problem; come back and I make some more.” “Maybe I will Jose.” It was clear that Lena and Steve were ready to go. Patting him on the back, I said, “Come on, let’s bounce!” When Maria walked us to the exit, applause filled the air with several people giving Steve the thumbs up. It was hard to keep from laughing once I realized the ‘thumbs up’ must be Houston’s official sign of approval. Once we were outside, Maria rushed over to the police car and yelled at Raul. After she had finished telling him off, Maria came back and hugged Lena. “Call me if you need me,” she said. Lena softly replied, “Okay, I will.” We watched her walk back inside then headed to Lena’s car. It was best to just let her blow off steam so we decided to keep quiet as she mumbled angrily in Spanish. Lena focused on the budding romance once we were in the car. It was clear that Steve was ready to spend time with her so I told them I was going around the corner for a pack of cigarettes so they could have some privacy. Steve shot back, “But you don’t smoke!” “You’re right man but I could really go for one after all the chaos tonight!” Lena quickly said, “Ron, I can drive you.” “That’s okay; I’ll have my uncle pick me up at the store so you guys can go on up to the room and relax.” Lena asked if I was sure but before I could answer, Steve said, “Oh, he’s sure!” It was hard not to laugh at his ploy to get her alone.

What’s in in it for me? Pulling into the parking lot, Lena said, “Ron, I’m sorry about tonight.” I was so glad I was on my way to see Sam that it didn’t matter. “Lena, you don’t have anything to feel sorry about; it wasn’t your fault.” Steve gave me some dap and said, “I’ll catch you later.” I watched them walk into the hotel then reached for my cell to call Sam. “What’s up sexy?” he answered on the first ring. “I’m just ready to relax!” I sighed. “Cool, I’m right down the block,” he said. “I can see you from here.” I spotted Sam’s truck as he flashed the lights. It was hard not to notice the gleam of his smile as he drove closer. He opened the passenger door and asked if everything was okay. “Yeah, it’s just been one hell of a night.” He flashed his million dollar smile as he said, “Well Ron, your night is about to get better.”

Christopher Beckwith

Nineteen Nineteen Strangers in the night teve led Lena inside then kissed her softly. After the kiss, he was confused by her empathetic expression. He flinched as she reached out to stroke his bruised face. What he didn’t realize was his eye was swollen and discolored from the run-in with Raul. She pulled away and said, “Steve, I’m so sorry.” “That’s okay,” he sighed as he walked over to the mirror for a closer look. “Damn, I guess he got in a good one!” “¡Raul es un asno tan estúpido!” Lena realized he didn’t understand so she translated, “Raul is such a stupid ass!” Steve couldn’t help laughing. “I’m sorry; my high school Spanish is a little rusty so you’ll have to work with me.” “It’s okay Steve; Raul just makes me so mad!” He faced Lena and said, “Let’s not talk about him.” She wrapped her arms around his waist and told him he should put some ice on his eye. “Yeah, you’re right,” he said reaching for the ice bucket. “Make yourself comfortable while I go get some.” Lena was open to the idea of a romantic night with Steve even though she wasn’t sure how far it would go. She reached for the ice bucket when Steve walked in and said, “Let me do that for you.” His smile widened as he replied, “Whatever you say.”

What’s in in it for me? He watched her reach for a hand towel then went over to sit on the bed once she shot him a stern look. “That’s a good boy,” Lena said sweetly. She wrapped a handful of ice in the hand towel then put it over Steve’s eye. After a flinch, he released a sigh of relief. “Does that feel good Papi?” she asked seductively. “Mm hmm!” he moaned wrapping his arms around her. Lena caressed the back of Steve’s neck as he located her zipper and exposed the smooth skin of her back. A soft moan escaped her lips once she noticed the growing bulge pressing against her leg. “¡Ah es tan grande!” she said deviously. Finally, a statement he understood. A lusty grin covered his face as he responded, “So you think it’s big, huh?” Then it was her turn to moan, “Mm hmm!” Steve stood up and kissed Lena. After the lingering kiss, she let the dress slide to the floor then cupped her breasts as she stepped free of the fabric at her ankles. Pulling her close, Steve said, “Thanks for the company.” She climbed on the bed with her pumps still in tact then rolled over to give him a partial view of the precious gem inside her lace panties. Steve’s arousal grew as she seductively removed them. “Um, um, um,” he moaned. He quickly tore out of his clothes then put an ice cube in his mouth before climbing on top of Lena. Her body tensed as he rubbed the cube against her nipple. He alternated between her nipples as the splash of melting drops drove her to the edge of euphoria. Thrashing from side to side, she sighed, “¡Es tan bueno!” Steve realized she was telling him how good it felt. “Like

Christopher Beckwith that, huh?” he teased with the cube clenched in his teeth. “Oh yes Papi!” she cried out. He moved to Lena’s cropped bush causing her to squirm wildly; then he swallowed the cube and replaced it with his frigid tongue. Confident with his technique, he taunted her with long laps of his tongue and quick flicks of its tip. She screamed, “¡No pare! ¡No pare!” A lusty smile covered his face once he realized Lena was saying, ‘Don’t stop! Don’t stop!’ Steve crawled between her thighs, located his target then parted her flesh as she welcomed his firm presence. Moving slowly at first, his body took over increasing in rhythm to a beast-like fury. The room was filled with moans as they lost track of time. Lena screamed, “¡Me Vengo Papi! ¡Me Vengo!” “I’m coming too!” Steve huffed as he surrendered to his mounting climax. He released torrent after torrent as their bodies melded. The couple was stunned as their moans were eclipsed by the enraged wall-pounding of a guest in the adjacent room. Steve collapsed breathlessly on top of Lena. They gazed into each other’s eyes then laughed at the thought of being overheard by neighboring guests.

What’s in in it for me?

Twenty The gift horse

was about to climb in the truck but was caught off guard when I saw a gift-wrapped box on the seat. I was filled with emotion as I tried to come up with words to explain what I was feeling. Sam was an amazing man and here was another sign of how wonderful he was. Sensing my surprise, Sam said, “Oh, that’s not for you.” He laughed at my embarrassment as he confessed, “I’m just kidding Ron; it’s a gift to keep you company on those lonely nights when you go home.” I quickly responded, “I don’t do dildos man!” Choking on his laughter, Sam teased, “So much for your Christmas gift!” I was moved by his kindness and tickled by his humor. Then he asked, “Are you going with me or not?” “I guess that depends on what’s in the box!” Rolling his eyes, he said, “Get your ass in this truck!” I climbed in and put the box on my lap. I was dying to open it but I didn’t want to destroy his hard work by tearing into the beautiful wrapping too soon. He anxiously asked, “Well, aren’t you gonna open it?” I tried to conceal my excitement as I uttered, “I guess!” There was a yellow rose on top of yellow tissue paper. I picked up the rose and pulled back the tissue paper to find a

Christopher Beckwith sterling silver frame holding a picture of Sam. “I wanted you to have a little reminder to take home.” I tried to fight back tears that were already spilling from my eyes. One of them splashed on the frame as I took it from the box to get a closer look. It was a snapshot of Sam in front of a quaint house dressed in a navy blue suit. “So where was the picture taken?” “That’s my parent’s house; it was Father’s Day and my mom was taking pictures like a mad woman.” “It’s a nice house; is this where you grew up?” Sam told me his grandparents gave it to his parents as a wedding gift and they had lived there ever since. “That’s beautiful; where do they live?” “They live in Montgomery,” he said. I told him I had family in Montgomery but I hadn’t been there in years. Sam seemed surprised and asked, “Oh really, where do they live?” “All I remember is they live near the coliseum.” I was amazed when he said his parents lived in the same area. He asked my relative’s names but I was sure he didn’t know them. His expression proved me wrong when I replied, “Their names are William and Grace Hutchinson.” “You mean Bill and Grace Hutchinson over on Graham Avenue?” “Yeah, I believe that’s the name of the street.” “My dad and Bill worked together for years,” Sam said. “We used to go over there for dinner all the time!” It was hard not to laugh as I replied, “Okay, I know it’s the same family; my aunt is known for her dinner parties.”

What’s in in it for me? He quickly said, “I can’t believe we never met.” “Wait a minute!” I shrieked. “You’re Sammy!” “That’s what they call me but I don’t remember you.” “We were there for Thanksgiving and your family came over for dinner. I’m not surprised you don’t remember me; I was a kid.” Sam snapped, “Ronnie?” “That’s me!” I said. “Man, I had a major crush on you!” “It’s a good thing you didn’t act on it; I probably would have kicked your ass!” It was hard not to laugh as I responded, “Probably so.” “Wow, I can’t believe this!” he said. “I know Sam; it’s funny how your destiny is mapped out long before you know it!” Looking closer at the picture, I mentioned how much I liked the house. Smiling, he said, “You should see it now; I renovated the kitchen last year for my parent’s anniversary.” I was quick to respond, “Now that’s what I call a gift!” “I was just glad I could do it for them,” Sam said. “They loved it!” “Now aren’t you the ideal son!” “Yeah, and the ideal boyfriend too!” he snickered. I playfully replied, “The jury is still out on that one!” “Don’t deliberate too long; a brotha’s still got options!”

Christopher Beckwith

TwentyTwenty-one The Cock Pit

andy turned into the lot at The Cock Pit hoping to find a parking space. He faced the reality that he’d have to park across the street or down the block as he watched the car ahead of him pull into the last space. “I don’t believe this shit!” he grunted. He was surprised by the glare of reverse lights on a car pulling out of a parking space. ‘This must be my lucky night!’ he thought as he waited for the car to back out. Richard and Bryan were headed for the entrance when he got out of his car. “What’s up sluts?” Randy called out. “There’s another adoring fan!” Bryan said turning to see who could possibly know them so well. Spotting Randy, he fired back, “I don’t see your mama out here!” Randy warned, “Bitch, you don’t wanna go there; you’ll get that ass tore up quick about Hattie Mae Richards!” Stepping between his friends, Richard informed, “Okay dragons, we don’t have time for this; there’s trade inside!” “That’s what’s up!” Bryan said. Even though the entrance was overrun with people, the line moved at a steady pace as everyone flashed their ID and paid the cover charge. Randy watched his friends hand their IDs to Midnight. The nickname was because of his blue-black skin but it was

What’s in in it for me? rumored that his meaty plank was even darker. He recalled a conversation where Midnight told him, ‘They call me Midnight ‘cause you can’t see the dick coming!’ That was a total turn on for Randy. Midnight wasn’t long on looks but his body could rival a Greek God. His chest was rock solid and his arms were the size of the average man’s thighs. It was hard for Randy to decide which was more tempting, Midnight’s firm butt or the bulge trapped in his jeans. Bryan and Richard headed to the admissions booth after they were frisked by Midnight; then it was Randy’s turn. He loved the weekly pat-down even though it was the extent of Midnight’s attention. Miss Stella was working the admissions counter keeping a keen eye on every dollar crossing the threshold. She was a sweetheart but didn’t play when it came to money. She once joked, ‘These punks couldn’t get a toothpick past me if they tried!’ Miss Stella managed to hold on to her good looks even though life hadn’t dealt her the best hand. We assumed she was at least sixty but no one knew how old she really was. The club was owned by her brother Barry. He was rarely there but when he was, everyone knew it. He was a big hairy beast with more teeth than the average mouth could accommodate. He usually dressed like a pimp in a colorful suit and hat with matching gators. Miss Stella flashed Randy a grin as he approached her. He squealed, “Hey Miss Stella.” “Hey baby,” she squawked in her cigarette-aged voice. She was clearly puzzled as she asked, “Where’s Ron?” “He’s in Houston on business,” Randy said.

Christopher Beckwith “Well, he’ll be pissed when you tell him how much fun y’all had tonight.” Randy chuckled, “Yeah, that’s what I told him.” Not missing a beat, Miss Stella counted along as Bryan fumbled through a wad of bills. Handing her a twenty, Randy said, “This is for all of us!” She looked at the bill then reminded him that the cover was ten dollars. He summoned his sweetest smile then said, “Miss Stella, you know you can do this for me girl!” “All right, but you better be glad Barry ain’t here!” “Thank you baby,” he mouthed. She said, “We brought in some talent from Washington, D.C. so y’all should have fun.” “That’s the plan!” Randy responded with a wink. Miss Stella laughed her gravely laugh as she said, “Well, get on in there ‘cause the show done started already!” The crowd was usually standing room only so it wasn’t a surprise that it took some work to get to the bar. Mike acknowledged Randy with a nod to let him know he’d be with him once he was finished with another patron. He’s one of the more popular bartenders at The Cock Pit due to his good looks and muscular physique. Mike is a big exhibitionist and doesn’t mind going shirtless with jeans sagging low enough to reveal the crack of his ass. The guys enjoyed the direct view of Insane’s baby-oiled ass humping a dude he had trapped against the bar. He’s one of the regular dancers with a legendary reputation and with good reason. Richard grabbed his crotch and barked, “Do y’all see the yams on that sexy muthafucka?”

What’s in in it for me? “Um, um, um,” Bryan groaned. “The ass nice but I wanna see that sausage!” Randy said causing Richard and Bryan to double over with laughter. Mike was wearing a big grin when he came over to take their order. “I’m sorry but you gotta watch these tricks; turn your back and they’ll be gone!” Randy snapped, “Child, you gotta be on your game with these girls!” Mike couldn’t help laughing as he asked Randy what he wanted to drink. “I’m having a Malibu Rum and pineapple juice.” “Got it!” Mike said. “What about Richard and Bryan?” Insane was sandwiched between the guys when Randy turned around. He huffed, “What are you whores drinking?” They tipped Insane before he drifted into the crowd. “Haaaaay Mike!” they sang out in unison. “Hey back atcha!” he said. “So what can I get for y’all?” Richard told Mike that he wanted a Heineken and Bryan asked for a Long Island Iced Tea. “It’s a done deal!” Mike said with a wink. Randy was suddenly caught off guard by a tap on his shoulder. He looked back and saw Bruce in the same jogging suit from earlier in the week—he thought it was tacky but he got over it. “What’s up Brucie?” he asked trying to sound sexy. “Everything!” Bruce said as he grabbed his bulge. “I was hoping I’d see you; we still got some unfinished business.” Randy seductively responded, “Could be.” Once Mike was finished with the drinks, he said, “Here you go Randy; it’s sixteen dollars.” Randy told Mike to keep the change after handing him a

Christopher Beckwith twenty then turned his attention back to Bruce. “So what brings you out?” he asked. “I’m just doing what I do!” Bruce answered slyly. Randy coyly asked, “And what might that be?” “Stick around and you just might find out!” What Bruce didn’t realize was that’s exactly what Randy intended to do. Glancing over Randy’s shoulder, Bruce cautiously said, “Man, I just wanted to holla. I see a couple of my boys in the corner; I’ma go see what’s up with them—don’t get lost.” Randy began, “You can’t lose me that...” before realizing Bruce was already walking away. Once Bruce was gone, Bryan snapped, “Bitch, you don’t want none of that; I heard that fool is crazy!” There was no hiding the irritation in Randy’s voice as he fired back, “Child, what are you talking about?” Before Bryan could respond, Richard added, “I heard he almost beat a dude to death because he wouldn’t pay for sex. I don’t know how true it is but he looks like bad news!” Randy was unfazed by the comment as he replied, “I can handle mine; remember, I’m a big girl!” “You can say that again!” Bryan mumbled. “And this big girl can whip your scrawny ass any day of the week, trust!” Mama Pearl, the shows M.C. and Atlanta’s most notorious drag queen, chased Insane around the dance floor once the song ended. She grabbed at the money tucked in his armband screaming, “Bring yo’ bitch-ass back here!” Insane ran through the curtain draping off the dressing area leaving Mama Pearl alone on the dance floor. “Just make sure you have my money when I come back

What’s in in it for me? there!” Mama Pearl screamed. The crowd roared when she added, “I gotta let these muthafuckas know who Mama is!” “That’s one sick bitch right there!” Randy shouted. Richard agreed, “Child, you can say that again!” Then Mama Pearl announced, “All the way from D.C., let’s make some noise for Thunder and Lightning!” The duo emerged from the curtain as the DJ played ‘Did it on ‘em’ by Nicki Minaj. “That’s my shit!” Randy squealed. Armed with Super Soaker water guns, they dropped the towels wrapped around their waists, sized each other up and took aim before opening fire. Their daggers stood straight up as the beading water drained from their brawny bodies. The empty guns were tossed aside as they picked up the towels and dried each other’s drenched body. The dance floor was showered with tips as a roar erupted from the crowd. Thunder and Lightning ignored the tips and grabbed their hefty shafts as a ‘sword fight’ ensued. This nearly caused a riot with the crowd pushing and shoving to get a better view. Mama Pearl screamed, “Oh shit, we’re all goin’ to jail!” Randy said, “Miss Stella was right; it’s bananas tonight!” “Those dudes are off the meter!” Mike yelled as he gave Randy a high five. “Y’all better lock the doors,” Randy said. “Everybody in this bitch is gonna be naked in a minute!” “Please not Mama Pearl!” Richard pleaded. The DJ stopped the music while blowing a siren to bring a halt to the chaos. The silence was shattered by frantic chants of: ‘More! More! More! More!’

Christopher Beckwith The crowd laughed as Mama Pearl staggered around the dance floor mimicking a Fred Sanford heart attack. “Did y’all see that shit? D.C. is in the house tonight bay-bee!” The crowd cheered wildly in agreement. Mama Pearl shouted, “I’m sending y’all tramps home so I can keep them to myself!” The club was filled with a round of boos as Thunder and Lightning casually stroked their swollen rods. “Do y’all bitches want more?” Mama Pearl screamed. The crowd pounded bottles on the table tops shouting: ‘Fuck yeah! Fuck yeah! Fuck yeah! Fuck yeah!’ “Mama knows what you whores want. DJ, put the music back on!” The crowd cheered wildly as Rihanna’s ‘Birthday Cake’ blazed from the speakers. Mama Pearl moved aside as the beefy studs took turns licking each other’s nipples. Randy was surprised when he was suddenly wrapped in a hug. He looked back to see that Bruce was the source of the affection. Bruce whispered, “You like that, huh?” Randy leaned into Bruce and said, “Hell yeah, this shit is hot as fuck!” “Maybe you’d like your own private show.” Nudging him in the ribs, Randy replied, “Sounds good!” “Then let’s make it happen!” Bruce said with a swat to Randy’s ass. Randy figured a hook up with Bruce far outweighed the suspicions of his skeptical friends. He was sure that he could handle the situation if things got out of hand. “You wanna chill at my place?” he asked seductively. “I’m in!” Bruce said with his hand lingering on Randy’s

What’s in in it for me? ass. “This dick’s been waiting long enough!” Randy told his friends he was about to leave and asked if they needed a ride. “I know you’re not leaving,” Richard said. “This is some of the hottest shit I’ve ever seen!” “Yeah, but I’ve got some hot shit of my own right here!” “Bitch, you don’t know shit about him!” Bryan sneered. Randy said, “Yeah, but I’m about to find out!” “Don’t you wanna see the rest of the show?” “I’d rather have a private show at home,” Randy said. Richard didn’t hesitate to say, “He’s gonna have to work hard to top this!” “Baby, I’m sure he’s up to the challenge!” Bryan grabbed Randy’s arm and asked, “Are you sure?” “Don’t worry about me; Mama needs some dick!” “Just remember, a smart bitch is always on her game!” Bryan said firmly. Randy ignored the advice and said, “Call me tomorrow so you can tell me about the rest of the show.” As they hugged, Richard whispered, “Randy, make sure you remember what we said.”

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Christopher Beckwith

TwentyTwenty-two Some enchanted evening

woke up when the truck shifted as Sam pulled into the driveway. It was hard to believe we were there already then it dawned on me how long I had been asleep. I was groggy but I was glad we finally made it. Sam pulled into the garage then said, “I’ll be right back.” He got out of the truck and turned back to shoot me a wink before heading inside. It was hard not to wonder what he was up to but I decided to wait to see why he was being so mysterious. I was getting a little annoyed after three songs, even Will Downing’s velvet voice wasn’t much of a comfort anymore. Fifteen minutes had passed so I went to see what was going on. I tried the door but it was locked; then I really got pissed. My anger faded when Sam opened the door wearing a silk robe. It was hard not to notice how appetizing he looked. “I see someone’s getting a little impatient,” he said. “I was wondering if I was gonna have to spend the night in your truck. And besides, I gotta pee!” Flashing his incredible smile, he said, “The place I had in mind for you to spend the night is a lot more comfortable.” I was stunned by the atmosphere when I walked in. The kitchen was lit by candles and incense filled the air. After a soft kiss, he said, “Ron, tonight is all about you.”

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What’s in in it for me? I followed Sam to the dining room where the table was set with elegant china, crystal wine stems and cloth napkins. Then I noticed a silk robe waiting on a dining chair. He handed me the robe and pointed me to the bathroom to get changed. Just as I was heading toward the hallway, he added, “Don’t forget to pee while you’re in there!” Tickled by his smart-assed reminder, I headed off to the bathroom to do both. The bathroom was lit with candles that echoed the ambiance of the rest of the house. As I got undressed, I realized how lucky meeting Sam was; I never expected it. I slipped on the robe then turned to head back when it dawned on me that I had actually forgotten to pee. A feast consisting of Caesar salad, Shrimp linguine and toasted garlic bread was waiting when I returned. Impressed again, I said, “Sam, the food looks delicious.” “Thanks, I hope you like pasta.” I felt myself smiling as I said, “It’s one of my favorites.” Sam opened the bottle of wine then sat it aside to give it time to breathe. I was amazed at how classy he was. We sat down and gazed into each other’s eyes like lovesick teenagers. Sam reached for my hands and said, “I want to say a prayer of thanks for this special night.” I watched in silence as he prepared to pray. He began, “Heavenly Father, first let me thank you for your grace and mercy. I can never express my appreciation of how good you’ve been. Lord, I thank you for the meal that you have provided and for bringing this wonderful man into my life. Amen.” Sam noticed tears forming in my eyes and asked, “Ron, is everything okay?”

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Christopher Beckwith I simply answered, “I couldn’t be better.” He squeezed my hands and said, “Good, let’s eat!” I poured two glasses of wine as Sam dished up heaping portions of pasta and two bowls of salad. “I think we’re ready to eat, go ahead and tell me what you think.” The first bite of pasta drove my taste buds wild. He must have realized I was pleased because he was grinning from ear to ear. “I guess that means you like it, huh?” “Sam, I can’t begin to tell you how good this is!” I was slightly embarrassed when he asked, “Didn’t your mother tell you not to talk with your mouth full?” “Okay, you got me; but seriously, where did you learn to cook like this?” He told me he spent a lot of time in the kitchen with his grandmother as a kid. “Ron, she could cook with the best of ‘em. One of my favorites was the oyster dressing she always made for Thanksgiving!” “Damn, it sounds good; I’ve never had oyster dressing!” “Man, that shit was off the chain! I’ve tried to make it a few times but it never comes close to hers.” The salad sat patiently waiting to be tasted. After I took my first bite, the amazing flavor caused my eyes to roll. Once I had my bearings, I had to ask Sam what he did to the salad. “It’s jalapeno juice,” he said. “I use it to add a little kick.” “Sam, this has got to be the best salad I’ve ever had!” “I’m glad you like it; my wife thought it was too spicy.” “So you used to cook for your wife?” “Yeah, sometimes we would even cook together!” Without thinking, I asked why she let him get away.

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What’s in in it for me? Sam’s silence proved he was thrown by the question. He finally said, “Ron, my wife fell in love with someone else.” “I’m sorry Sam; I shouldn’t have asked that.” He forced a smile and said, “That’s okay; it is what it is!” I told him we didn’t have to talk about it but he insisted. “My wife and I were always close and now I think of her as my best friend; sometimes I think that’s all we ever were.” I sipped my wine as he explained that his wife started spending a lot of time in Birmingham. “At first, she would take the kids with her but then she started going alone. I thought Elaine was just homesick but my gut told me there was more to it. I got suspicious when she got back just in time for work one Monday morning.” I didn’t want to interrupt so I nodded as he continued. “Elaine took the kids to spend the summer with her parents once school was out. It was strange that she felt she had to stay until the kids got settled in; they were always excited about going to see their grandparents. I guess you just know when things aren’t right.” I could tell it was a hard subject for Sam so I reached for the wine and filled our glasses. “Elaine called to let me know she was coming home and said we needed to talk. She didn’t say what she wanted to talk about; she just asked me to meet her. I told her I loved her and she said, ‘I love you too Sam; more than you know.’ That was the end of the call.” I felt like I should stop him but the voice of reason told me to let him talk. “When I went to meet her, I sat outside for what seemed like hours but couldn’t have been more than a few minutes. I didn’t want to keep her waiting so I headed inside. I noticed

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Christopher Beckwith Elaine sitting with a woman who I assumed she had there for support. She said she had someone she wanted me to meet then took the woman’s hand and said, ‘Sam, this is my friend Sandra.’ When Sandra reached out to shake my hand, I knew what was going on the instant our hands touched.” “Sam, are you telling me that…” “Yeah Ron, Elaine was trying to tell me she was in love with Sandra?” All I could say was, “Damn!” “I know we just met but I feel a strong bond with you,” he said. “I’ve known people for years that I haven’t talked to about this.” “I’m touched that you wanted to share this with me.” “Ron, I’m just beginning to share.” I was flattered that Sam felt he could confide in me. The main complaint I have about dating guys is most men aren’t willing to open up. “It seemed like I was having an out of body experience,” he said. “I just sat across from my wife staring through her as she tried to explain what she was feeling. It’s funny because I don’t remember half of what she said.” “Wow, that’s deep!” “Ron, by the time she was finished, I knew there was no way I could stand in the way of her happiness.” “Sam, it must have been hard to let her go.” “It hit me like a ton of bricks; I couldn’t figure out what I had done wrong. I hadn’t planned to go to Dave’s but I had to have a drink; I needed something to help me come to grips with losing my wife to a woman.” Sam’s mood lightened as he explained that he was at the bar drowning his sorrows when a guy sat next to him. Tilting

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What’s in in it for me? his head in wonder, he added, “Now that I think about it, he was really sexy!” I braced myself as I asked, “Okay, what happened?” “It was simple at first. The guy introduced himself and told me he was in town on business. He didn’t want to sit in his room so he asked a bellman where he could get a beer.” There was no question that Sam was enjoying rehashing the story as I sat on the edge of my seat waiting for more. He noticed I was getting into the story and said, “I know you’re wondering where this is going. You see, I wasn’t into guys before that night. I mean, I played around as a teenager and got some head in college but that was it!” “You mean you slept with him!” With a chuckle, he admitted, “Well, I didn’t sleep with him but we did the next best thing!” I was curious so I asked how the dude let him know he wanted to hook up. “It wasn’t a sexual conversation; he just asked questions like what I did for a living, how long I had lived in Houston and what the nightlife was like.” My tongue was clearly loosened by the wine as I asked, “And that got you in bed with him?” Sam leaned back with a slight grin. “I don’t know why I did it; I guess I was just bitter about Elaine’s confession. All I know is I was drunk and needed vindication!” “Drunk enough to kick it with a dude, right?” “Man, I was horny too!” he snapped. “Okay, you were horny; so how did y’all hook up?” “He said he was headed back to the hotel and asked if I wanted to come. Before I knew it, I was in his room getting the best blowjob I’d ever had!”

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Christopher Beckwith Then I teased, “So that’s how you got turned out, huh?” “What do you mean ‘turned out’?” Sam was laughing so hard when I tried to defend myself that he ended with a snort. Then it was my turn to laugh. As my laughter faded, I said, “Okay, finish the story.” Sam said he tried to convince himself that it was just a drunken urge but he couldn’t shake it, “…his mouth just felt so good! I was tempted to try it again but I didn’t act on it. It was months before I had another encounter with a dude; too bad it was a train wreck!” He noticed I hadn’t touched my food and asked if I was going to finish my dinner. “The food is incredible; it’s just that first-time stories are a big turn on for me.” “So I guess that means you wanna hear more,” he asked then laughed as I tried to chew and nod at the same time. “I was inspecting a house at one of our properties when a little cutie drove up in a Mazda Miata. The top was down so I got a good look at him before he got out. He said he was interested in the house and asked if he could look around. I told him to go ahead and that changed everything.” “Okay, I’m listening!” I said like a kid clinging to every word of a bedtime story. Sam chuckled as he described how sexy the guy was. “I didn’t notice at first but when he walked up the front steps, the bubble-butt peeking from his jeans caught my eye.” I anxiously asked, “Well, did you go after it?” “Not right off but he was inside so long I just had to see what he was up to. When I called out to see where he was, he said he was in the master bedroom and told me to come on up. What else could I do?”

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What’s in in it for me? I wondered if Sam fucked him right there in the house but I kept quiet because I was eager to hear what happened. “I got another glimpse of that sweet booty when I got to the top of the stairs. I was hoping he didn’t notice that I was getting turned on but I couldn’t hide it.” “What do you mean ‘you couldn’t hide it’?” He chuckled, “Lil’ Sammy was squirming like crazy!” It was hard not to laugh as he explained how turned on he was. “The guy was going on and on about how he could feed an army in the kitchen. Then he looked down at the knot in my pants and told me he could just imagine all the fun he would have in the bedroom.” “I’ll be that got your attention!” I joked. “Ron, I couldn’t stop thinking about him face down with that ass hiked in the air!” The picture he was painting lured me in as I envisioned us doing a tag-team on that imaginary booty. Then I couldn’t believe what he said next. “I lagged behind on the way downstairs so I could get another look at that juicy butt. He reached out to shake my hand and said he had to leave. The handshake turned into a hug and before I knew it, I had a handful of his ass.” I tried to ignore my bone stirring under the table but it was useless; the story had me. Sam said, “I was horny and he knew it. He asked if I was hungry so I answered, ‘Hungry for what?’ He told me he was headed home for lunch and asked if I wanted to join him. In no time, I was following him to his apartment.” “Sounds like food was the last thing on your mind.” “We never got around to lunch; he dropped to his knees

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Christopher Beckwith and swallowed my stick the second we walked inside!” “Damn!” I blurted out. “The brotha got right to it, huh?” “It was lame though; nothing like the toe-curling session with the dude from Dave’s. What I really wanted was a shot at that tight butt! He went to get the lube and when he came back, I had dropped my jeans and Lil’ Sammy was standing at full attention.” “Was he surprised to see you ready to go?” “At that point, I was too horny to care; I jumped right in. He flinched at first but I just kept humping—that’s when the drama started.” I immediately asked, “What kind of drama?” “His boyfriend caught us in the act. I didn’t know how long he had been watching but I was pounding that ass real good when he started screaming.” “What?” I squeaked. “It scared the shit out of me Ron; I really thought he was gonna kill us!” I sat there bug-eyed as he told me he didn’t know what to do. He said the dude came up with some half-assed excuse but he wasn’t waiting around to see what would happen. “I pulled up my pants and got the hell out of there!” “Damn, that’s crucial!” I said choking on my laughter. “Ron, I guess I don’t have to tell you they didn’t buy the house!” he joked. “Man, that’s the best first-time story I’ve ever heard!” He adamantly said, “I’m just glad I lived to tell it!” I pushed my plate away and told him I was stuffed. “Okay, we’ve had dinner and we’re tipsy from drinking all this wine,” he said. “What do you wanna do now?” “I guess we could watch another basketball game.”

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What’s in in it for me? He stood up and flung his robe open planting his balled fists on his hips like a true super hero. He lustfully replied, “I was thinking baseball since I have a big bat and a couple of balls over here raring to go!” “I guess someone’s corny gene is raging, huh?” “Everything about me is raging!” he said. That last sip of wine drooled over my chest as I tried to swallow through my laughter. “You okay Mister?” Trying not to choke, I said, “Yeah slugger, I’ll be fine.” He walked around to my side of the table with his big bat peeking through his robe and said, “Here, let me help you.” I stood up with my bat peeking out more than ready to get in the game. Sam went straight for the drop of wine that settled in my navel. He slurped the drops on my stomach as he worked his way up to the residue on my chest. Sam lashed his tongue against my throbbing nipple then asked, “Now isn’t that better?” I playfully responded, “Didn’t your mother tell you not to talk with your mouth full?” He sarcastically said, “Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a comedian in the house!” “You’re the funny man!” Sam warned, “We’ll see how funny you think I am when I get you in the bedroom!” My head swooned as he kissed me softly. After the kiss, I asked if he was forgetting something. His lips barely moved from mine as he replied, “I don’t think so.” “But what about the table?” “Forget it,” he moaned. “The table can wait but I can’t!”

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Christopher Beckwith I was filled with excitement as he led me to his bedroom. The darkness warmed once Sam lit a candle to create an atmosphere as sultry as the night before. Then he hit a button on the remote and the air was filled with the smooth sounds of Cassandra Wilson. I felt a chill as Sam slid the robe past my shoulders and nudged his club between my thighs. That’s when I tightened my grip causing him to moan as I searched for his lips. “I’ve leaned a lot since those first guys,” he whispered. “Let me show you what I’ve learned.” I was hypnotized by Sam’s muscular physique when he climbed on the bed. My first instinct was to join him but my feet wouldn’t move. “What are you waiting for?” he asked. I was finally able to climb on the bed and crawl on top of him. He gazed into my eyes as my lips landed on his. “Ron, you feel so good,” he sighed. Sam massaged my back with one hand as he toyed with the crevice of my ass with the other; the sensation was mindboggling! “Sam, even though we were feeling each other, we have to be safe,” I said. “Yeah, I’m ready for this,” he responded before kissing me again. I was relieved that he wanted to play it safe. He reached into the nightstand for a condom and was sea worthy in no time. Jumping in where he left off, Sam snuggled behind me and wormed between my cheeks. I grabbed the sheets when he located his target and said, “Relax baby, I want you to enjoy this as much as I do.” We kissed as I adapted to his presence. I was surprised

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What’s in in it for me? by his patience as he waited for his reward. Then our moans merged once our bodies settled into a rhythm. Sam nibbled my earlobe then whispered, “Ron, I wanna look in your eyes while we make love.” After I flipped over, he found his new position between my legs and guided himself home. “That’s what I’m talking about!” he grunted. I wanted to respond but all I could do was moan; I just couldn’t believe how tender the moment was. “Oh yeah baby,” he sighed. “Show daddy what love is!” Our tempo escalated as my legs locked around his back. Sam’s lunges triggered my orgasm as I gave in to my first hands-free climax. Sam struggled to catch his breath then collapsed on top of me. Looking at me with dazed eyes, he said, “Ron, I think I’m falling in love with you.” I couldn’t believe I was saying it but I responded, “I feel the same way Sam.” He nuzzled my neck as he pulled me closer. “Sam, I’ve been waiting a long time to hear those words but I never expected it to happen.” When he didn’t answer, I called out, “Sam?…Sam?” I laughed as he started snoring right in the middle of our pillow talk. Sam looked really peaceful so I wrapped my arm around him and drifted off.

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TwentyTwenty-three Getting down to business

andy sped out of the parking lot in a mad dash to get to his apartment. A smile covered his face as he realized he was about to get just what he had been waiting for. Then he backed off the gas hoping not to seem too eager. Reclining his seat, Bruce said, “Yo, I was feelin’ you the other night but you disappeared before I could holla.” Randy replied, “I was diggin’ you too but my friend had to leave. I wasn’t ready to go but we were riding together so I didn’t have a choice.” Bruce moved Randy’s hand from the gearshift knob and placed it on the thickness growing down the side of his leg. He flexed the beefy tube against Randy’s palm as he asked, “Wanna shift this for a while?” “Don’t play with me,” Randy warned. “I’ll suck the skin off that shit!” Bruce shot back, “Do whatever you want as long as you leave my lil’ buddy happy!” “That won’t be a problem; you got a pro on your hands tonight!” Randy teased. Bruce chuckled without saying a word. Out of curiosity, Randy asked if Bruce was from Atlanta. He simply answered, “No, I’m not.”

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What’s in in it for me? Pressing for a more direct answer, Randy asked, “Okay Brucie, where are you from?” Bruce said, “You could say I’m from here and there.” He realized it wasn’t the answer Randy was looking for so he added, “The important thing is I’m here right now.” Randy decided to drop the issue since he wasn’t getting anywhere and settled on entertaining himself with the thick monster instead. Eager to oblige, Bruce slid his sweats past his thighs to free the swollen organ. A sigh eased from his lips when he felt Randy’s touch. “Yeah, that’s it son; get to know him ‘cause you got your work cut out for you!” Randy raced through the streets with the urgency of a firefighter going from Bruce’s lap to the gearshift knob then back again. His skill of handling both sticks was a turn on for Bruce as he enjoyed the impromptu foreplay. Bruce reluctantly pulled up his pants as Randy parked. “Well, here we are,” Randy said. Bruce hopped out of the car then followed Randy playfully slapping him on the ass as they climbed the stairs. “Maybe you should chill on the physical stuff until we get inside,” Randy warned. “I’ll bet my neighbor is watching us from her peephole.” As Randy slid his key in the lock, Bruce waved his middle finger at the door across the way and said, “There you go Miss nosey ass!” Randy grabbed Bruce’s animated finger and pulled him inside. “I’ll bet she saw that,” he said trying not to laugh. Bruce huffed, “That was the point!” Randy tossed his keys on the breakfast bar as he asked if Bruce wanted a beer.

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Christopher Beckwith “No doubt!” Bruce said. He walked over to gaze out the patio door before twisting the handle to close the blinds. He was heading in Randy’s direction when he returned with two bottles of beer. When Randy handed him one of the beers, Bruce took a deep chug then released a quenched sigh. “So do you smoke trees?” Randy asked. A grin invaded Bruce’s face as he barked, “Hell yeah!” “Good, I picked up a bag on my way to the club.” A belch escaped Bruce’s lips as he sat the bottle down on the coffee table. “Now that’s what I’m talking about!” he said as he plopped on the sofa. “I hope you smoke blunts.” “I like Kush wraps,” Randy replied. “I hate the mess you get when you crack a cigar.” Bruce eagerly responded, “Well, make it happen son!” Randy took the weed and wraps from his sock and emptied the bag on a magazine cover. Then he proceeded to fold, squeeze and flip until he rolled the perfect spliff. He sparked the tip and inhaled a blast before exhaling a cloud of smoke. Bruce reached for the blunt then closed his eyes as he took a long drag. He held it for a moment before blowing the smoke into Randy’s face then sighed, “Now that’s just what I needed to get this dick hard!” “Well, is it working?” Randy asked. Bruce gruffly said, “See for yourself!” Randy was instantly turned on when Bruce grabbed the back of his head and forced him to his knees. “Ain’t this what you wanted?” Bruce growled The brutal change had an instant effect on Randy as he moaned, “It’s exactly what I wanted.” “Then suck this dick bitch ass nigga!” Randy reached for Bruce’s sweatpants but his hand was

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What’s in in it for me? slapped away. Bruce barked, “Let me hear you say you want this dick!” “Let me show you how much I want it,” Randy replied making another attempt at Bruce’s sweatpants. Once again, Bruce slapped Randy’s hand away and said, “I got this!” He handed Randy the blunt then pushed his sweatpants to the floor allowing his straining muscle to spring up and graze Randy’s lips. Randy marveled at the beefy slab realizing the teaser in the car was nothing compared to the full course he had now. He was caught off guard when Bruce lunged forward stuffing his sex-starved mouth. Bruce humped into Randy’s face as he demanded, “Suck that shit; you know you want this dick!” Randy was turned on by the fact that Bruce continued to smoke as he filled his mouth. He tried not to gag from the chunk pounding the back of his throat but it was useless. He enjoyed the lusty assault but it was all he could do to resist heaving on the hammering pole. Bruce’s groans evolved into growls as he grabbed his weapon. “Oh shit!” he huffed. He shuddered wildly as spurt after spurt landed on Randy’s face. He breathlessly grunted, “Hell yeah!” as he spanked Randy’s tongue with a splash. Randy was disappointed that it was over so fast but the fact that Bruce was no match for his oral skills was definitely the highest compliment. “Man, that was good!” Bruce sighed. “So you liked that, huh?” Still winded, Bruce panted, “Yeah man, you got skills!” “Cool, maybe we can get together some other time.”

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Christopher Beckwith “Man, you can service me anytime!” Bruce huffed. Randy tried to conceal his excitement about hooking up with Bruce in the future. Then he wondered what Ron would say about his encounter with Brucie. His excitement faded when Bruce asked, “You think you could help me out with a few dollars?” Expecting the question, Randy lied, “Man, I spent all my cash at the club.” Bruce remained silent for a moment before responding, “Okay man, that’s cool.” It irritated Randy when trade would ask for money right after sex so he was relieved that Bruce dropped the subject. Growing tired of the sticky essence coating his face, he headed to the bathroom to get cleaned up. Reaching into the linen closet, Randy said, “There’s a washcloth in here if you need one.” Bruce waddled over to the linen closet. He reached for a washcloth, wiped his shaft clean then tossed it to the floor. Randy was washing his face when Bruce peeked in and asked if he could have another beer. “Help yourself,” Randy said. He chuckled as Bruce walked away without washing his hands thinking, ‘Oh well, that’s a man for you!’ Bruce returned and snuggled Randy from behind. “So you’re back,” Randy said feeling secure as he rested his head on Bruce’s shoulder. Randy was gripped by a sharp pain as Bruce kissed him on the neck. In that moment, he violently thrust a knife into Randy’s back slicing through an artery before puncturing his kidney. Bruce glared at Randy’s expression in the mirror as he twisted the knife then pulled it from his back and gazed at

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What’s in in it for me? the bloody blade. Bruce slid the knife in his pocket as he said, “You should have broke me off with some dough when I asked nigga!” Randy’s eyes widened in disbelief as Bruce allowed him to drop to the floor. His mind raced as the paralyzing pain became a secondary thought to his life-robbing injury. A tear slid from his eye as he lay on the floor with his blurred vision locked on Bruce as he walked out of the bathroom. Randy heard the sound of Bruce moving his television then the DVD player followed by the mini stereo system to the front door. He was saddened that the value of his life had been reduced to a few measly electronics. His eyes finally closed as he heard the jingle of his keys being picked up from the breakfast bar.

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TwentyTwenty-four Good morning Mister

woke up to find Sam sound asleep and snoring like a Grizzly. It was hard to believe I was waking up with this perfect man next to me. My head was in the clouds from our amazing night and I was thankful for it. I was surprised I was hungry after the incredible dinner. Then I thought about the dishes waiting in the dining room and decided to cook breakfast. All I needed to do was find something to scrape together so we could eat before heading to the hotel. I tried not to wake Sam as I eased out of bed and headed to the bathroom to brush my teeth. On my way back through the bedroom, I was relieved that he was sleeping like a baby. I stopped by the dining room and looked at the cluttered table. It was pointless to put it off any longer so I gathered as many dishes as I could carry and headed for the kitchen. The hanging basket of potatoes next to the stove made it easy to decide on home fries; all I had to do was find something to go with them. I was surprised to find the refrigerator was stocked with everything I needed for breakfast. There were plenty of eggs, country ham and a can of biscuits tucked inside. “Perfect,” I said. I sliced the potatoes first since they’d take the longest to

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What’s in in it for me? cook. Once I had them in the pan, I found a skillet, threw in a couple of slices of ham and slid them in the oven. “And now for the eggs!” I said imitating Emeril Lagasse. I wondered if Sam liked them with cheese so I checked to see if he had any. Finding a bag of grated cheddar in the vegetable bin, I said, “Voila!” I closed the door and was scared shitless by Sam standing there wearing nothing but a smile. Sounding like a bear emerging from hibernation, he asked what smelled so good. “You scared the shit out of me!” I yelled. “That’s funny; I thought I’d already fucked the shit out of you last night!” “Oh, so you got jokes!” I shot back trying my best not to laugh. “You know that was disgusting!” “Yeah, but we had fun!” he chuckled. “I was talking about that nasty remark.” Pouring on the innocence, he responded, “I thought you meant our nasty little session last night.” I sucked my teeth then said, “Get over here and give me a good morning kiss.” “Anything you say,” he replied. Sam closed in and planted a kiss on my lips; his morning wood stirred between us as I searched for his tongue. I chuckled, “Calm down big boy; we don’t have time for round two!” “Yeah, I know but you can’t blame a brotha for trying.” “So do you like cheese in your eggs?” He responded, “I wouldn’t have them any other way!” “Good, make yourself useful and scramble some!” “Yes sir!” he replied with a salute. I glanced over my shoulder at Sam’s plump ass as I tried

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Christopher Beckwith my best to concentrate on the dishes but I was getting a little ‘woodie’ of my own. I suggested he put the biscuits in the oven once he had the eggs in the skillet. “I’m already on it!” he said reaching for the can. “Well Sam, I guess were about ready to eat.” In a decent impression of Chris Tucker, he replied, “And you know this, man!” Once I had the dishwasher loaded, Sam told me to have a seat and he would bring our plates to the table. “No, not this morning; it was my idea to cook so I’ll get them,” I said. He happily responded, “Whatever you say!” Sam headed for the breakfast nook unconsciously mooning me with that amazing booty. I knew I should follow my gut so I insisted he go put some clothes on his naked ass. “A brotha gets no love around here!” he whined as he headed to the bedroom. I had the plates on the table and the orange juice poured by the time Sam returned. He was wearing a wife beater and pajama pants that were almost as tempting as his nudity. “Everything’s done, are you ready to eat?” “Are you kidding?” he shot back. “Since you did such a good job of blessing the food last night, I’ll do the honors.” Sam smiled and said, “Be my guest.” I recited, “Good bread, good meat, good God, let’s eat!” He shook his head as he said, “Ron, you’re crazy man!” “No, just hungry,” I replied. Taking his first bite of eggs, Sam said, “These are good!” I couldn’t help teasing, “I guess that’s not a compliment

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What’s in in it for me? since you cooked them.” “Yeah, I guess you’re right. I’m just impressed that you decided to cook at all; you know that’s a good way to keep a brotha on lock!” I casually responded, “I’ll have to remember that.” The only sounds at the table were our smacking lips and the occasional giggles so there was no question that the food was good. “I guess today’s the day,” he said in an attempt to sound upbeat. I sighed, “Yeah, I guess this is our last day together.” “I wouldn’t say that Ron; I’m gonna see you whenever I can,” he said. A smile crept onto my face as the promise lightened my mood. “You know I’m gonna hold you to that, right?” I laughed when he said, “I’m counting on it.” I was in Houston on a trip I didn’t want to take sitting across from the man of my dreams. Randy had always told me I’d find love when I least expected it; I couldn’t wait to tell him he was right. ‘Damn!’ I thought looking at Sam’s plate. I’d only eaten half of my breakfast but he was almost finished. “You must have been hungry,” I said. “Well, you know what they say about growing boys.” “You may be a grower but you’re definitely no boy!” He deviously replied, “Just make sure you help me keep it growing!” I tried not to laugh but it was useless. I realized we had a schedule to keep so I picked up my pace to finish eating. I took my last bite and said, “We better get out of here.” “Yeah, I’m sure Tom will be looking for us.”

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Christopher Beckwith His face was invaded by a devilish grin as he suggested we play around a little before heading out. Without giving it a second thought, I said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Well, maybe just a little.â&#x20AC;?

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TwentyTwenty-five By the skin of my teeth! ena was walking across the parking lot when Sam pulled in. I felt a pinch of panic hoping she wouldn’t see us. If she hadn’t known him, I could have passed him off as a cousin but that wasn’t an option. The last thing either of us needed was to get busted. I quickly said, “Sam, there’s Lena; pull over to the left!” He headed in the opposite direction just in time to avoid her. It was an uncanny coincidence for us to run into her. Breathing a sigh of relief, I said, “That was a close one!” He huffed, “You can say that again!” I turned my back to make sure she wouldn’t see me. “I wanna make sure she’s gone before I get out,” I said. “Look at you, nervous as a school girl on prom night!” “Sam, that shit ain’t funny!” “Okay Ron, calm down; she’ll be gone in a minute.” I relaxed once I was sure Lena was out of the parking lot. I reached for the door handle then stopped to thank Sam for dinner. “You’re a great cook and the dessert was amazing!” He looked puzzled as he began, “But we didn’t have…” then chuckled once he realized what I meant. “Ron, if I have my way there will be plenty of that to come!” Opening the door, I said, “I guess I’d better get upstairs

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Christopher Beckwith and get changed. I don’t want to make you, I mean us late.” “Yeah, I’m sure Tom will be waiting for us.” I got out of Sam’s truck then leaned in for a kiss. I was tempted to climb back inside but we were pressed for time. “Okay Mister, I’ll see you soon.” “I’ll be counting the minutes,” he said. I simply responded, “The clock is ticking!”

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TwentyTwenty-six Totally busted! teve pulled the curtain back to watch Lena walking to her car. As she drove off, he realized the night was more than a hook up—a lot more. He wasn’t looking for love but he hadn’t expected to meet someone as special as Lena. He was about to walk away when he saw what looked like Sam’s truck at the far end of the parking lot. He didn’t think much of it until the door opened so he waited to see who would get out. Steve was stunned when Ron stepped out of the truck but the shocker was the kiss—suddenly it all made sense. Attacked by a wave of anger, he realized the romance had been hiding in plain sight. He tried to calm down but he was pissed. ‘That lying ass has been playin’ me the whole time!’ he thought. He wondered if he should say something then decided there was no way he was gonna let Ron get away with disrespecting him. “I’m thinking we’re coming to Houston to fuck with the honies and he was planning to get with that nigga the whole time. I knew he was gay; his punk-ass don’t ever try to holla at no hoes!” He realized he was giving the situation too much energy

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Christopher Beckwith and wondered why he was so mad. “Just admit it,” he grunted, “you’ve been played!”

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TwentyTwenty-seven Uncle Sam teve was in the bathroom gargling when I walked in. I was confused by his icy mood and wondered if things didn’t go well with Lena. Then I realized that couldn’t be the case because she spent the night. I noticed his bruised eye and figured he was still a little upset about the skirmish with Raul. “Damn man, that eye is looking foul; are you all right?” “I’m cool,” he huffed as he brushed past me. “What’s up with you?” I told him that I was ready to get back to Atlanta; then I thought about Sam and realized I wasn’t. He seemed irritated when he asked, “So, did you have a good time last night?” “Yeah, I had fun; my uncle just dropped me off.” Steve casually asked, “So, how’s Uncle Sam doing?” Struggling to remain calm, I said, “What are you talking about, my uncle’s name is William.” “That may be but you said he just dropped you off.” “Yeah, that’s what I said.” “So why did I see you getting out of Sam’s truck?” I suddenly went numb. I realized I had to come up with something so I told him that we bumped into Sam when my uncle stopped for gas.

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Christopher Beckwith “Okay, so y’all just happened to run into Sam; the story seems a little different now.” It sounded good to me but he was all over my slip up. “I got it Ron, Sam offered you a ride so your uncle could head to work and you were so grateful that you thanked him with a kiss.” That one hit me like a baseball bat. Before I could respond, he said, “A player knows game!” Battling the panic in my voice, I asked, “So you think I’m running game on you?” He spat back, “I know you are!” I started speaking with no idea of what I was going to say. “Look Steve, I didn’t know how to bring it up.” “I’ve heard the rumors at work but I didn’t think much of it; now it makes sense,” he said. “I just wish we had talked about it.” It was hard to control my shaky voice as I said, “There was nothing to talk about; my personal life has nothing to do with work.” “We’re sleeping in the same hotel room and you didn’t think I needed to know you’re gay?” I told him I wasn’t ashamed of my sexuality so I wasn’t embarrassed. “I didn’t think we needed to talk about it Steve; I never thought you’d find out.” He seemed to be analyzing the situation when out of nowhere, he asked, “I just wanna know if you knew Sam before the trip.” I quickly said, “No, I didn’t know Sam before the trip.” Then I thought about our encounter as kids and admitted, “Well, that’s not exactly true.” “So you were planning to hook up with Sam!”

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What’s in in it for me? I fired back, “What’s with the third degree Steve?” “I’m just saying Ron; I’m trying to figure out what I’m dealing with.” I told Steve that I met Sam when I was a kid and hadn’t thought about him since. I explained how it all came back to me while we were talking about where he was from. He growled, “And you expect me to believe that?” “Yeah, it’s the truth. I didn’t even recognize him at first.” He tried to fight it but he couldn’t help laughing. “The funniest part is I had a crush on Sam when I was a kid,” I said. “I thought he was mad sexy!” “So it was a match made in heaven, huh?” I chuckled, “Yeah Steve, I guess you could say that.” I was relieved that he was starting to relax but I wasn’t expecting the turn the conversation took from there. “Ron, my brother Doug is gay so I’m cool with it as long as you respect me.” Stunned by the statement, I asked, “So have you always been cool with your brother’s sexuality?” “No, he helped me come to grips with my homophobia. We were always close and we’re even closer now that I know what’s up.” I felt better after Steve told me about Doug. My straight friends are cool with my sexuality but I never expected that from him. “Steve, how did you find out your brother was gay?” “I found out back in college. My dad always wanted us to attend his Alma Mata, Bethune-Cookman. Doug enrolled during my junior year and my roommate was transferring to Dillard so there was no question that he was moving in with me. I was cool with it because we were so close.”

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Christopher Beckwith I asked Steve if having his little brother around cramped his style. He laughed as he explained, “No Ron, but what could I say; my parents were paying the rent.” Then I asked Steve if he ever had doubts about Doug’s sexuality before he came to live with him. “Nah, I never had a reason to. Doug was a jock in high school; he even introduced me to my girlfriend. He was just a regular dude in my eyes.” I wanted to hear more so I asked Steve how Doug came out to him. “He didn’t Ron; I walked in on him and my frat brother going at it one night.” I immediately said, “Damn!” Steve told me it happened while he was working at the Athlete’s Foot in Volusia Mall. He said he got sick at work so his boss let him leave early. “When I got home, they were in the middle of the living room floor humping like dogs. I was blown away; I couldn’t believe my eyes!” At that point, I was speechless and a little turned on. He could hardly stop laughing as he said, “It set me off Ron; I called them every kind of faggot I could think of!” “Oh, so you were homophobic, huh?” “I was just disappointed because he’s my brother; it was the first time something like that had hit so close to home.” “I gotta ask how you dealt with it after you found out.” “I didn’t speak to Doug for weeks; he said he was just horny but I wasn’t trying to hear it. I thought about telling our parents but he begged me not to. I knew it would hurt them so I just kept quiet.” “So did Doug ever come out to your parents?”

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What’s in in it for me? “Eventually but it took time,” he said. “Doug got a job in New York after graduation and he hardly called after that.” “That must have been hard on your parents.” “Yeah, it was but my mom really took it hard; she just couldn’t understand why Doug was being so distant.” “Wow, that’s sad!” I said. “My mom pressured Doug to come home for Christmas. When he said he’d only come if he could bring a friend, she was like, ‘Whatever you want baby; just come home!’ I could tell she was hoping Doug was bringing his girlfriend but I knew better.” “So did you get a chance to see Doug?” “I offered to pick him up from the airport so I could get a feel for what was going on. When I called to get his flight information, Doug told me he had two surprises. I was like, ‘Nigga, don’t come down here in a dress!’ I was relieved when he let me know he was as hard as ever.” He said he didn’t know what to expect but he was ready for just about anything. “I was waiting for Doug at baggage claim. When he walked up, he hugged me so tight I thought I was gonna pass out!” “I guess he was glad to see you, huh?” “I was glad to see him too. I hadn’t seen Doug in over two years so it was good to have him home. I was surprised he was alone so I asked about his friend. No sooner than I could get it out, I noticed a dude with two kids walking in our direction.” I blurted out, “Two kids!” “Yeah, I didn’t know what to make of the situation so I just watched them hug like a couple reunited after the war.” I laughed as I pictured the embrace. I could imagine the

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Christopher Beckwith look on his face as he watched his brother showing affection for a man. “So you got to meet Doug’s boyfriend, huh?” “Doug put his arm around me and introduced his little family. The kids were shy at first and waved without saying a word; I melted right there man.” “That’s cool how you just accepted them like that.” “What else could I do? He’s my brother and I love him; I just wanted Doug to be happy.” I respected Steve; there aren’t many men who can have a bomb like that dropped on them and accept it for what it is. “So does Doug’s friend have custody of his kids?” He seemed a little solemn as he said, “Yeah, Fredrick has custody of his kids.” I wondered what was wrong then decided not to push it. “I’m sorry Ron; it just bothers me when I think about the kids growing up without their mother. Fredrick came out to his wife a couple of years after they got married. He said she wanted to stay together for the kids but she was diagnosed with cervical cancer a year later.” “Steve, we don’t have to talk about this.” Forcing a smile, he replied, “It’s okay Ron; I want you to understand how I learned to accept people no matter what. Fredrick loved his wife; he told me she passed away eleven months into her battle. His in-laws wanted the kids but he was determined to raise them. “Man, he sounds like a really cool brotha!” “Ron, Fredrick really loves Doug and there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for the kids.” Then I asked how his parents handled the news. “That wasn’t so easy. My mom was nice to Fredrick and

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What’s in in it for me? she fell in love with the kids from the door.” “Now that’s cool,” I said. “Yeah, she really tried but my dad was another story.” “So your dad had a problem with it, huh?” “He was polite at first but he didn’t have much to say once Doug explained who Fredrick was.” “Aw man, that’s sad.” “I think what hurt my dad was he never suspected Doug was gay; he was such a straight up dude.” “Well, at least your mom was cool with it.” “Don’t get me wrong, it was hard on her too. She asked me to help her change the sheets on the guest bed. When we got upstairs, she cried like crazy. She told me she had doubts about Doug but just ignored them. It was hard because she loved Doug and had to accept him regardless of his lifestyle; she only wanted him to be happy.” Then Steve told me how things improved over time. “It took a while but they came around. Doug lives with Fredrick now and he and my parents are closer than ever.” I told Steve that his support probably helped them deal with Doug’s sexuality. “You’re right; I kept reminding them that he was their son and they had to accept his choices.” “It’s really cool how you went to bat for Doug like that.” “He’s my brother and I love him more than anything.” “Sounds like a happy ending, huh?” “They couldn’t be happier. I love my niece and nephew and Fredrick is really cool; we’ve gotten pretty close.” I saw Steve in a different light; it takes a lot to talk about something so personal. “I guess that means you’re cool with me and Sam.”

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Christopher Beckwith “Don’t you mean Uncle Sam?” I chuckled, “Yeah, I guess I do.” I was glad we could joke about it. I wanted to hear more but the conversation would have to wait. “Steve, I’m glad we had this talk. I always thought you were cool but I feel like we’re much closer now.” “You’ve always been cool Ron; just remember I like the ladies and I need tits with my snatch!” I told him I didn’t doubt it for a second. “I wanna keep this between us though; I know there are people at work that have suspicions about me but they don’t need confirmation.” I laughed as Steve tried to wink his blackened eye while telling me my secret was safe. I responded, “Cool, remember what happens in Houston stays in Houston!”

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What’s in in it for me?

TwentyTwenty-eight Time’s up!

checked to make sure I had everything then followed Steve to the elevator. I breathed a sigh of relief when the doors opened as soon as he hit the button. I was ready to get our last day over with; the only downside to going home was leaving Sam. When we stepped in the elevator, Steve asked if I really liked Sam or if it was a fling. “I thought it was just a jump off but he turned out to be sincere. I wasn’t expecting it but I really like him.” Patting me on the back, he said, “That’s all that matters.” As we walked through the lobby, Steve noticed the desk clerk that checked us in was assisting an elderly couple. “I’ll be out in a minute,” he said with a sly grin. I was heading toward the exit when Derrick walked in. I had to admit, he looked incredible in his tailored uniform. Then I thought how ironic it was that he hadn’t crossed my mind since I met Sam. He looked at my bags and asked, “You’re leaving?” “Yeah man, I gotta get back to Atlanta.” His mood soured as he replied, “I wanted to show you some of the sights while you were here.” It was hard not to laugh as I realized the sights he had in mind were probably in his pants. I hoped I sounded sincere

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Christopher Beckwith when I said I was so busy that I didn’t have time to take him up on his offer. Derrick was quick to let me know he was still interested. “I would say it’s your loss but I’ll let you slide. You can take me out for a drink the next time I’m in Atlanta. I have a sister there so I visit from time to time.” ‘Look at this shit!’ I thought. I hadn’t been on a real date in months and I come to Houston and meet two hot dudes. It didn’t take long to realize there was no contest though—Sam was one in a million. Derrick handed me a business card in a lingering handshake. “Here’s my number,” he said. “Stay in touch and we’ll make it happen.” I made an empty promise to call then headed outside. I looked back and noticed he hadn’t budged. Just as the doors were about to close, Derrick shot me a wink then walked off. Sam was on the phone when I climbed in the truck. “We’re heading out now,” he said. “See ya’ in a few.” I looked at him and realized I was having the time of my life. Then I laughed as I remembered I didn’t want to come. “What’s up sexy,” Sam said, “I was just telling Tom that I’ll take y’all to the airport.” I was feeling a little playful so I thanked him with a kiss on the cheek. “What’s up with the peck on the cheek shit?” he huffed. “I want a real kiss!” Our lips were sealed before I could respond but it didn’t matter because I really didn’t have much to say anyway. He ended the kiss then said, “I’m gonna miss you Ron.” I simply replied, “I miss you already.” The intimate moment was interrupted by Steve pulling

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What’s in in it for me? on the door handle. We snapped into place just as he opened the door. He immediately teased, “What’s up Uncle Sam?” The greeting went over Sam’s head so I told him Steve saw me getting out of his truck. “Didn’t you tell him I ran into you at the filling station?” Steve asked, “Are y’all working from a script or what?” I laughed as I told Sam that he saw me do more than get out of his truck. Steve said, “I had my doubts but the kiss sealed it! Ron told me y’all got a little secret romance going on. My brother Doug is gay so I’m cool with the whole ‘homo’ thing; I know how y’all get down.” Sam’s initial reaction was to deny it. He realized it was useless so he said, “Ron, we gotta work on your game!” I wasn’t surprised when Steve added, “Yeah Ron, your shit is raggedy son!” Sam huffed, “You can say that again!” In an attempt to smooth things over, Steve joked, “What happens in Houston stays in Houston!” “Steve, don’t you mean what happens in this truck stays in this truck?” Sam asked. “Yes sir!” Steve answered with a wink.

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TwentyTwenty-nine The gang’s all here!

om was outside talking to Maria and Bill when we pulled up. Maria waved happily as we climbed out of Sam’s truck. She looked stunning in a pair of jeans that were just as tight as those she wore the day before. “Hello guys,” she sang out. I was glad Maria was in a good mood after the chaos at Caliente. I was worried she would still be upset but I guess she got over it. Taking a closer look, she said, “Oh my God Steve, your eye looks terrible. I’m sorry about last night.” “Well Maria, meeting Lena made up for everything.” Maria beamed as she responded, “I talked to Lena this morning and she thinks meeting you was the best part of last night too!” Bill reached out for a handshake as he said, “I told Tom your designs are perfect!” I smiled as Sam slipped me a wink for the good work. There was no denying Steve’s pride as he admitted, “We can’t take all the credit; Maria’s input really helped finalize the plans.” “Maria has a knack for design,” Tom said. “I don’t know what we’d do without her.” “I’m sure we can find a job for her in Atlanta if you ever

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What’s in in it for me? change your mind,” I joked. “Not on your life!” he chuckled. There was no question that Bill agreed with Tom. “You can have anybody but Maria and Sam!” he said. What he didn’t know was I already had Sam on lock. I noticed a smile on Sam’s face that confirmed he was thinking the same thing. “We already started on the designs and they’re working fine,” Bill said. Tom suggested we go see how the work was going since he hadn’t had a chance to see it yet. “Yeah, I’m curious to see how it’s going too!” Steve said. We headed across the street to a house where the modifications were in progress. There was a plumber working in the kitchen and three sheetrock hangers in the family room installing the last of the ceiling panels; that was a sure sign that the house was almost finished. Bill asked us to come upstairs with him to see the new master bedroom. Maria said, “You guys go ahead, I need to talk to Steve.” We agreed and headed upstairs as they stayed behind. Maria told Steve she hoped the fight with Raul wouldn’t stop him from seeing Lena. “She’s worried she will never see you again when you go back to Atlanta.” “I really like Lena; she’s a very special lady. I’d be a fool to walk away from a woman like her.” She hugged Steve and said, “You are a special man too; you will make Lena very happy.” “You’re a special woman Maria, Miguel is a lucky man!” Maria playfully replied, “Please tell him!” They were locked in an embrace when we made it back

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Christopher Beckwith downstairs. Steve wanted to make sure no one got the wrong idea so he explained that Maria was giving him some advice about Lena. “Well, that’s good to hear,” Tom said. “I wouldn’t want Miguel to come to Atlanta looking for you; he’s a killer!” We laughed when Maria added, “…a killer pussycat!” “The framers are working on the house next door,” Bill said. “We should go see how it is going.” Tom mentioned that it was a smaller house so he wanted to see how the new designs were working. I was shocked to see Lena when we walked outside. She looked amazing in a white blouse with a plunging neckline and a floral skirt that offered a peek at her stunning legs as she walked. Steve’s smile was proof that she was making a lasting impression on him. Closing the gap between us, she called out, “¡Hola!” Steve met Lena then wrapped his arms around her as he kissed her softly. “I see someone’s had a good time!” Tom teased. Steve replied, “Tom, you don’t know the half of it!” Bill told Lena that her timing was perfect. “We are going to see some of Steve and Ron’s work.” Snuggling Steve, she said, “I would love to come too!” I couldn’t believe they considered it a small house. I was familiar with the layout but we referred to it as a moderatesized house. My eyes were drawn to the kitchen when we walked in. What could have been a cramped space was open and airy. “Let’s go upstairs to see the bedrooms,” Bill suggested. I was relieved that they were happy with the designs but my mood went from relief to pride once we were upstairs.

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What’s in in it for me? I was quick to say, “Man, these framers are magicians.” “You guys are the magicians!” Tom said. “Are you sure I can’t talk y’all into moving to Houston?” Pulling Lena close, Steve confessed, “I don’t know Tom, Houston is looking better by the minute!” I looked at Sam thinking the exact same thing. Tom said, “I went over the drafts with Bill and we really like the way they turned out. I’ve already told Mr. Pendleton how pleased we are with all your hard work.” I smiled realizing what the trip could do for my career. Then Tom said, “I know Steve is enjoying his visit but it looks like were done. I guess y’all can head back to Atlanta.” I struggled with my emotions as it sank in that we were about to leave. The last thing I wanted to do was say goodbye to Sam. I was relieved when Maria asked if we were hungry. Steve said, “Yeah, now that you mention it.” I was glad that the idea of food was on the table since it meant spending more time with Sam. I had a taste for some Mexican food and asked Maria if she had any suggestions. “This is your lucky day; we wanted you guys to have a good meal so Miguel is cooking for us now!” My stomach danced at the thought of authentic Mexican food so I anxiously said, “Now ya’ talking!” Maria asked Tom and Bill if they wanted to join us. Tom teased, “As good as it sounds, some of us still have work to do.” Maria turned to Sam and said, “I know you’re coming!” I was sure of his answer before he was. It was hard not to laugh when he answered, “Yeah Maria, I’m in!”

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Thirty The last supper

aria lived in Magnolia Park in Houston’s East End. It was a community with a rich Latin heritage and standouts like the Urban Market and Guadalupe Plaza Park. The neighborhood wasn’t affluent but it seemed to be making strides to recover from years of neglect. I couldn’t help laughing about the mobile taco stands we were constantly dodging; they were nothing more than converted ice cream trucks. It was even funnier that they were all playing the annoying jingle that ends with the animated female voice saying, “Hello!” All I could say was, “What the hell!” I laughed when Sam told me they call them roach coaches. “You’d think they would use different music,” I said. He chuckled, “Now I guess you’ve seen it all!” I was impressed with Maria’s house. It was a renovated bungalow that stood out from the other homes; a diamond in the ruff. As we got out of Sam’s truck, Jose pulled up in a candy apple red Honda Civic. He was sporting a grin as he walked up with a case of Coronas in tow. “¡Hola!” he shouted. In a weak attempt at Spanish, I said, “Hola back atcha!” Sam laughed as I butchered a language I didn’t speak.

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What’s in in it for me? “What’s up Jose?” he said. Raising the beer as confirmation, Jose replied, “I’m fine!” With her hands planted on her hips, Maria huffed, “You guys are moving too slow!” Jose sprinted toward the porch where our friends were waiting. He called out, “Hurry, Miguel will eat everything!” Once we caught up with the hungry mob, Steve told us to go on in because he wanted to talk to Lena. When I asked if he was about to pop the question, he snapped, “Ron, don’t be ridiculous!” Lena didn’t hesitate to ask what he meant by ‘ridiculous’. Steve choked back his laughter as he reminded Lena that they weren’t that serious yet. “I just wanted you to know I’ve really enjoyed spending time with you. You’ve brought out feelings I haven’t felt in years. I know we’re leaving today but I still wanna see you.” Lena cooed, “I still want to see you too Papi!” Glad that they were on the same page, he asked if she’d like to come to Atlanta for a visit. Lena quickly took Steve up on the invitation stating, “I’d love to come; I have never been to Atlanta!” “Good!” he said before sealing the deal with a kiss. We all laughed as Jose gave the couple his blessing. “¡Gracias tanto!” Lena said about her brother’s approval. Maria insistently asked, “Can we go eat now?” “I’m all for that!” Sam bellowed. The aroma filling the house made my stomach growl. “Sounds like someone’s ready to eat!” Maria teased. Sam was quick to add, “He’s not the only one!” Jose went to the kitchen to put the beer away. Flinging the refrigerator door open, he said. “¡Hola Miguel!”

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Christopher Beckwith Miguel was at the stove putting the finishing touches on our meal. Glancing back at Jose, he asked, “¿Está usted listo para comer?” Jose eagerly responded, “Hell yeah I’m ready to eat!” Miguel laughed as he said, “Okay, let me say hello then we eat.” “¡Hola!” Miguel greeted through a big grin. He looked at Steve adding, “Your eye man, it looks real bad!” Everyone laughed as Steve admitted that it was a good thing it didn’t feel as bad as it looked. Lena’s aggravation returned as she grumbled, “Raul is a damn fool!” Maria huffed, “I don’t know what you ever see in him.” Grabbing my hand in a hearty handshake, Miguel said, “Ron, we had some fireworks last night!” Tickled by his enthusiasm, I was quick to respond, “You can say that again!” With a pat to Sam’s back, Miguel playfully said, “What’s up brother, the food is ready for you!” I was starting to think everyone in Houston knew how much Sam liked to eat. I figured I would have to work on my culinary skills if I was gonna keep him. Maria said, “Let’s go eat some of Miguel’s good food!” Jose was peeking in the pots when we walked in. Lena asked, “Jose, did you wash your hands?” He softly responded, “No, but I was gonna.” Our laughter dried up when Miguel stated, “That’s okay Jose, I didn’t wash mine either.” I could almost hear the sound of crickets chirping as the room suddenly went silent. Miguel laughed as he assured us that he was kidding.

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What’s in in it for me? Maria reached in the refrigerator and pulled out a huge pitcher of Sangria. “It’s time for a drink,” she said. “I made it this morning so it would be cold for us.” “Watch out!” Sam warned. “Maria made Sangria the last time I was here and it just about put me on my ass!” I struggled to hold back my laughter; just the thought of anything dealing with Sam’s ass got my attention. Miguel’s charming grin returned when Sam asked what he cooked. There was no hiding his pride as he responded, “I made burritos, enchiladas and nachos.” A roar of laughter filled the air when Steve asked why he didn’t cook tacos. Laughing, Miguel explained, “Mexicans don’t eat tacos, we make them to sell to Americans!” Sam told Steve that he asked the same question the first time he came over for dinner. A slight grin covered Steve’s face as he admitted, “Well, I guess I’ve been schooled in Mexican culture!” I needed to wash my hands so I asked where the bathroom was. Without looking up from filling the glasses, Maria said, “Jose can show you since he needs to wash his hands too!” “Come with me Ron, I’ll show you where it is,” he said. Sam suggested that he and Steve should go too. “Maria’s a beast about dirty hands in her kitchen!” Once we finished, Sam kicked us out so he could take a leak. I wanted to keep him company but I figured it was best to head back with Jose and Steve. When we returned, Maria joked, “I guess Sam had to do more than wash his hands.” Heading in our direction, Sam called out, “It’s not polite

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Christopher Beckwith to talk about somebody when they’re not in the room.” He stood next to me as our friends gathered around the table. Steve’s smirk was an indication that he was also aware of the slick move. “Okay, let’s eat!” Miguel said as we took our seats. “Y’all are in for a treat!” Sam said once we had the food piled on our plates. My first bite convinced me that he was right. Miguel had skills; I was surprised he was such a good cook. I moaned, “Miguel, you put your foot in this food!” Clearly baffled, he responded, “No Ron, just my hands.” Sam explained, “That’s something that Black people say when they think your food is good.” “Oh, I thought he didn’t like it.” I struggled to swallow as I chuckled, “I love it Miguel!” Then I remembered Sam asking if my mother ever told me not to talk with my mouth full. His grin let me know he was laughing inside. I looked around the table and noticed that everyone had a love interest except Jose. When I asked why he didn’t bring a date, Lena snapped, “Ron, he couldn’t decide which one to bring!” “I could decide but that means I am with her all day!” “What’s wrong with that?” Maria fired back. He replied, “She will tire me out; if I am with her all day, I can’t sex her all night!” It was all I could do to keep from choking. I really liked Jose; he was a cut up without even trying. Once the laugher faded, Maria offered to drive us to the airport. “There’s plenty of room in my truck,” she said. Sam told her that he would take us since our bags were

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What’s in in it for me? already in his truck. I wasn’t surprised when his leg brushed against mine to let me know he was reading my mind about spending more time together. Steve said, “Sam, I had something else in mind. Lena, do you mind driving me to the airport?” Leaning into him, she replied, “I’d be mad if you didn’t ask me to take you.” “Good,” he said. “Sam we’ll follow you there.” Jose asked Steve if he really liked his sister. “Yeah Jose, I have to admit I do.” “That’s good, you are better than Raul for her!” he said through a wide grin. Steve smiled and said, “I just hope your Papa thinks so!” Jose quickly replied, “Don’t worry, I will handle him!”

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ThirtyThirty-one Parting is such sweet sorrow

looked in the rearview mirror and noticed Lena walking around to meet Steve who was waiting like he was her Knight in Shining Armor. Steve took Lena into his arms for a kiss reminiscent of a true Casanova. I sat there trying to memorize every detail of what I was leaving behind then realized I’d better hurry if I was gonna get one last kiss. “Well, I guess this is it,” Sam said in a somber tone. “Yeah, I guess so,” I replied ignoring the tear forming at the corner of my eye. “I didn’t expect any of this but I’m glad it happened; meeting you was the best part of the trip!” Sam’s expression conveyed more than words ever could. He stroked my cheek with his thumb as he said, “I know we just met but you mean a lot to me.” I battled my emotions as I told him I felt the same way. Sam wiped away the dangling tear then said, “I want us to spend every possible moment together.” “Well, they say absence makes the heart grow fonder.” Sam replied, “They also say out of sight out of mind; just make sure you remember the right cliché!” “Don’t worry Mr. Hamilton, I’m not going anywhere.” That’s when he leaned in for a kiss. The sound of Steve banging on the rear window told me

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What’s in in it for me? it was time to leave. I was relieved about the light crowd at curbside check-in; I’d had the time of my life in Houston but it was time to go home so I wanted the trip to go smoothly. When I got out of the truck, Steve asked, “Are you ready to go or did you arrange for the plane to wait?” Tickled by my buddy’s smart-assed remark, I said, “If I had that kind of juice, I’d just have the pilot come back!” He kissed Lena again as I walked around to get my bags. I’ve always envied how straight couples can display public affection without giving it a second thought. I was dying for one last kiss but I decided it was best to settle for a hug instead. I put my bags down then reached out for a handshake. We wrapped each other in a manly hug but I sensed the passion surging between us. I whispered, “Goodbye Sam.” “Ron, this isn’t goodbye; it’s just so long.”

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ThirtyThirty-two two Welcome to Atlanta

was overcome by a strange chill as the plane neared the airport. The weather took an abrupt turn with ominous clouds engulfing us as we entered Atlanta’s airspace. I battled my nerves as jolts of turbulence prompted me to pray for a safe landing. I finally released my white-knuckled grip from the armrest as we escaped the clouds. I relaxed a little as the pilot announced, “Good evening and welcome to Atlanta. I’m expecting our remaining flight time to be roughly forty minutes as we make our approach. We’re experiencing overcast with unseasonable temperatures of forty-three degrees. Enjoy your stay in Hotlanta!” My exhaustion hit me as we taxied toward the terminal. Then I thought of Sam and realized it was worth it. Steve wearily said, “Well, it looks like we’re home.” “Yeah, I guess so,” I sighed. He suggested we take the moving sidewalks instead of the train. I was tired but I agreed since I wasn’t in the mood for a crowd. Our bags were waiting for us by the time we located the correct carousel. I gave Steve a fist bump and told him I’d see him at the office. “That depends on how I feel in the morning!” he joked. I said I was planning to be there and he should too.

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What’s in in it for me? As we headed for the exit, he replied, “Okay Mr. Davis, I’ll be there.” We were attacked by an icy breeze as the doors opened. Steve barked, “The pilot was right—damn it’s cold!” I looked at the dark, swirling clouds and mentioned how crazy the weather was for August. “Well, it is what it is!” he said. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” I pulled out my phone to call Randy as Steve headed off to find his car. I was anxious to hear what I missed Wednesday night. His voicemail picked up after three rings. I was always irritated when I had to sit through the chorus of Fantasia’s ‘Truth is’ before I could leave him a message. Finally, I heard Randy’s voice in an annoying attempt at sounding sexy: ‘If you’re not already with me it’s your loss. If you’re trying to get with me, give me a reason to call you back.’ I jumped in at the beep, “I’m back so call me when you get this; and hurry up before I change my mind!” I pressed the disconnect button causing my phone to slip through my fingers. I fumbled between my luggage and keys as it crashed to the pavement. I hoped it wasn’t damaged as, “Damn!” slipped from my lips. I was about to put my bags in the trunk when my phone started ringing. Sure that it was Randy calling, I picked it up and yelled, “You know I hate leaving messages for you!” I was surprised by Sam’s silky voice as he replied, “And welcome home to you Mister!” “Oh, what’s up sexy; I thought you were someone else.” “So, you’ve been home ten minutes and the ATL niggas are after you already?” He was kidding but Atlanta does have its reputation.

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Christopher Beckwith “No Sam, I left a message for a friend and I thought he was calling back.” “So how was your flight?” he asked. I sighed, “It was cool but I slept through most of it.” “Then I guess you’re good and rested, huh?” “I’m a little tired; you know how to wear a brotha out!” Sam followed a prideful snicker with, “Yeah, I’ve heard that before.” I didn’t doubt it for a second. “Sam, you won’t believe the weather; it’s cold as shit!” “How cold is it?” There was a chill in my voice when I told him it was in the forties. “But it’s August!” “I know; the wind is howling up a storm and the clouds are swirling around like a scene from a horror movie!” He confirmed how ridiculous I sounded as he teased, “I guess you better hurry home and lock your door!” Laughing, I said, “You’re right, I should quit trippin’!” The gulps floating through the phone said it all. I could see him in front of the television with a cold beer in one hand and the other in his pants. I was glad to be home but part of me wished I was there with him. I tossed my bags in the trunk as I told him I could go for a cold one. “I wish I was still there.” After a quenched sigh, he said, “That makes two of us!” “Well, you don’t have to rub it in!” “Ron, I have plenty for you to rub right here baby!” I was quick to let him know that I could handle mine so he should consider himself warned. “So is that a threat or a promise?”

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What’s in in it for me? “I don’t make threats but I could back it up if I did.” “You’ll get your chance; my daughter is singing a solo with the church choir in a few weeks and she begged me to come. I’m planning to rent a car to drive to Atlanta since it’s only a couple of hours from Birmingham.” “Sounds good, just remember to keep your hands off of Lil’ Sammy until you get here.” “Too late, I’m already rubbing him!” I laughed realizing my image was dead on. “Sam, you’re turning me on and I’m not even out of the parking lot yet.” “Oh, so I got a brotha sprung, huh?” “No, I’m not sprung but you have my attention.” “Okay, I’ll take that. Maybe it’s me who’s sprung!” I chuckled, “I’ll have to remember that.” “Well, it is what it is Ron; ain’t no shame in my game!” I was distracted by the cars waiting to exit the parking lot and decided I should get off the phone. “Sam, this traffic is crazy. Let me call you when I get home.” “Okay sweet cheeks,” he said. “I’ll talk to you later.” Sam’s sultry voice took my mind off of the bottleneck at the exit gate. I could hardly wait to get home to hear it again.

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ThirtyThirty-three Home at last!

stopped by the mailbox before heading to my apartment. Just as I expected, it was stuffed with junk mail and the utility bills that seemed to show up way too often. Since there was nothing to get excited about, I tossed the stack on the seat and headed home. I was greeted by a blast of frigid air when I opened the door. Then I remembered leaving the air conditioning on low thinking it would be hot when I got home. I dropped my bags and walked over to the thermostat to turn up the heat. I didn’t have a drink on the plane so I knew a shot was just what I needed to raise my body temperature. After pouring what turned out to be more than a shot, I went to my bedroom to rekindle my love affair with my bed. I kicked off my sneakers and tore out of my clothes then walked over to the floor-standing mirror and laughed as my jimmy jumped with excitement. There was no better time to call Sam so I reached for my phone and located his number. I was surprised when Sam answered, “Hey you!” on the second ring. “What’s up sexy?” I asked sliding under the covers. “Not much, just finishing my beer,” he said. “So I guess you made it home.”

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What’s in in it for me? “Yeah, I’m laying here sipping on some Jack Daniel’s. I needed something to help me unwind after the flight.” “Oh, so you’re in bed already?” “I sure am; it feels so good to be home.” Then Sam slyly asked, “So what are you wearing?” Practically giggling, I said, “Absolutely nothing!” “Is that so?” he responded in the sultry tone from before. “Mm hmm, and guess what else?” “I’m listening,” he said sounding even sexier. I giggled again as I told him I was hard as a rock. Sam moaned, “Damn baby, I can just see that ass now!” “Who said anything about my ass?” He adamantly replied, “I did!” I tried not to laugh but it was useless. Before I could respond, he asked if I would do a favor for him. I seductively answered, “Anything for you Mister.” “Smack it for me baby!” he insisted devilishly. I rolled over and gave my ass a good slap then laughed. Sam huffed, “Yeah baby, that’s what I’m talking about!” “So you like that, huh?” “Fuck yeah; I wish I was there kissing that sweet booty!” The faint grunt escaping his lips got the best of me so I asked what he was doing. “Do you really wanna know?” he chuckled. I cautiously replied, “I don’t know, do I?” Sam said Lil’ Sammy was squirming like crazy so he was trying to set him free. The sigh floating through the earpiece was confirmation that he accomplished his mission. “So is Lil’ Sammy okay now?” “Yeah, but he’d be better if you were here kissing him.” I was feeling a little nasty, I mean a little naughty so I

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Christopher Beckwith asked how I could help. He didn’t hesitate to say, “You can help me bust!” My words were laced with lust when I asked how I was supposed to do that from Atlanta. I was turned on when he said, “You know what to do!” “Damn, you really are a freak, huh?” “Call it what you want; just know I’m a freak for you!” Sam’s plea was totally intoxicating so I rolled on my side and gave my ass another swat to get him going. “Hell yeah baby!” he huffed. “I miss that ass already!” My junior was throbbing like crazy so I reached for the bottle of lube in my nightstand. When I flipped the cap, he stood up searching for the silky fluid then thrashed back and forth as it trickled over him. I moaned as I took matters into my own hands. Sam growled, “Yeah baby, tell daddy how good it feels!” At that point, I was ready to tell the world how good his sexy voice and my slippery hand were making me feel. “Sam, it feels so good!” I groaned. “Stroke that shit, let daddy hear you bust!” I was stroking my pole as if my life depended on it. My voice took over shouting, “Oh shit Sam—it feels good!” He was more direct barking, “Baby, stroke that dick for daddy!” and, “Don’t you wish I was there sucking on it!” Our dirty talk was replaced by whimpers. Sam’s moans were driving me crazy and the feeling was mutual. “Baby, I’m close,” he grunted. “Bust with me!” “Is that what you want?” I panted. “Yeah baby,” he wheezed, “skeet that shit!” He must have read my mind because I was on the edge. “Sam, I can’t hold it!” I moaned.

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What’s in in it for me? “Come on Ron,” he urged. “Let me hear it baby!” I shuddered as I erupted like a volcano; I just wished he could see my Cobra spitting venom all over my stomach. Sam’s moans caressed my ear before the sudden contrast of his growls announced his climax. He struggled to catch his breath as he gasped, “Damn that was hot!” As my breathing calmed, I told him that phone sex really wasn’t my thing. “It seems like it’s over before it begins!” He joked, “Ron, that’s what happens when you settle for knuckleheads!” With a slight chuckle, I replied, “Don’t I know it!” “I miss you Ron; I wanna jump on a plane and come to Atlanta right now!” “Well, you know where the airport is!” I teased. “Okay, keep playing and I’ll be knocking on your door before you know it!” “Now there’s a thought,” I joked. “I’m glad we hooked up Ron; I could get used to this!” “Sam, I’ve waited a long time to meet a man like you.” “Well, the wait is over!” he said.

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Christopher Beckwith

ThirtyThirty-four Taking the lead

was overdue for my morning sugar fix after going days without Krispy Kreme donuts. Enticed by the bright red ‘Hot Donuts Now’ sign, I turned in and found the parking space closest to the entrance. I was surprised that I didn’t see Miss Ella as I joined the heavy crowd. When it was my turn at the counter, I asked if she had the day off which brought on an instant change in the clerk’s expression. I cautiously asked, “Is everything okay?” She slowly responded, “Ella’s in the hospital.” “What!” I snapped before I realized I was shouting. She said Miss Ella broke her leg when she slipped on the freshly-mopped floor. “It scared the hell out of us!” “So, she’s in the hospital; is it serious?” “No,” the clerk said. “I think they just wanted to keep an eye on her because of her heart condition.” I was concerned because I had no idea that Miss Ella had a heart condition. Then I asked, “Do you know which hospital she’s in?” “Ella’s at Crawford Long but I’m not sure which room.” I thanked her and left without ordering. I wanted to convince myself that Miss Ella would be fine but I couldn’t help worrying about her.

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What’s in in it for me? When I got to work, I headed straight to my cubicle to call the hospital then I realized I didn’t know Miss Ella’s last name. I decided to call Krispy Kreme hoping someone would tell me what it was. I wasn’t surprised by the manager’s guarded tone when I asked Miss Ella’s last name. Once I explained that I was one of her favorite customers, he relaxed and told me that it was Washington. I quickly thanked him for his help then hung up. I dialed the hospital then waited for an answer. Once I was transferred to Miss Ella’s room, I was caught off guard by the youthful female voice that answered the phone. “Hello, I’m Ronald Davis,” I said cautiously. “I’d like to speak to Ella Washington.” The sweet voice replied, “I’m her niece Erica. The doctor is with her right now; would you like to leave a message?” I told her that I stop by Krispy Kreme quite a bit and had become very fond of her aunt. “Oh, you must be Ronnie; Aunt Ella talks about you all the time.” My stress eased as I asked, “Is that so?” “Yeah, she says you’d make a good husband.” I laughed when I heard Miss Ella in the background say, “He sure would!” That wasn’t a surprise because women are always trying to hook me up with their female friends and relatives. I wasn’t sure how to respond so I simply said, “Thanks.” Erica told me Miss Ella would love to see me and asked if I could come by for a visit. “I was about to ask if I could stop by after work. Do you know what the visiting hours are?”

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Christopher Beckwith She wasn’t sure of the visiting hours but said I should have plenty of time to visit. I thanked her and told her I’d see her later. An email alert from Devon appeared on my screen as I hung up. It said I was assigned to head the design team on a loft project in Midtown. It included a roster of my team and instructed me to meet with them after lunch. I was honored to be selected to head such an important project but my excitement was overshadowed by my concern for Miss Ella. I was relieved after I spoke to Erica but I was still worried. I decided to grab some chips to snack on while I worked on ideas for the meeting. When I got up, Steve was headed my way. “What’s up dawg?” he asked. “Just headed to the break room to get some chips.” “You’re not going to lunch?” “Naw, I’m gonna work on my notes for the meeting.” A proud smile covered Steve’s face as he replied, “The dynamic duo is back together again!” I was glad that Steve was assigned to the project too; his help would take a lot of the pressure off. Giving me a fist pound, he said he was going downstairs to get one of the greasy burgers the cafeteria was famous for and asked if I wanted one. I cringed at the thought and assured him that I didn’t. “Okay, see you at the meeting,” he said. When I walked in the break room, Rita was searching a Lean Cuisine container for one of the few pieces of chicken as Jasmine sipped on a Slim Fast shake. She was all ears taking in the highlights of Jasmine’s date from the night before but

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What’s in in it for me? that stopped once they noticed me. I thought that was funny since I’d already heard most of the tawdry details. Rita asked if we had a good time in Houston. “Yeah, we got a lot done and had some fun too!” I hoped I hadn’t piqued her curiosity as I thought of Sam. Instead she said, “I wish Mr. Pendleton would send me to Houston. My trifling ex lives there and he owes me child support. I’d do anything to get my hands on that bastard!” “I know that’s right!” added a supportive Jasmine. Heading for the snack machine, I mentioned that everything happens for a reason. “Maybe it’s not meant for you to confront him.” With a roll of her eyes, she spat back, “It’s not meant for him to get his scrawny ass whipped!” I laughed as I took my chips from the machine, adding, “Like I said, everything happens for a reason. I don’t think it would be a good look if Mr. Pendleton had to bail you out of jail!” “I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it!” she snapped. “If you say so,” I joked shaking my head as I walked out of the break room. I stopped to grab a legal pad from my desk then headed to the conference room to work on my notes for the meeting. I was really excited about the project and could hardly wait to share my ideas with the team. Everyone filed in once the lunch hour ended. Steve was followed by Judy and Mark who were assigned to site development. Sandra and Millie would handle interior design and Rita, who would take the minutes, also sat in on the meeting. I was happy with the diverse mixture of the group; each member had worked on major projects before which gave me

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Christopher Beckwith a strong team. “This is an important project and I’m sure we can come up with a plan that will exceed Mr. Pendleton’s expectations. I think we should go in a different direction than the other developments in Midtown. Before I get to the details, I want everyone to know that none of my ideas are carved in stone and I’m open to any suggestions.” Everyone seemed to be receptive so I continued with my plans. “Since the development is called Temple Trace, I was thinking we could base the designs on some of the buildings at Temple University. I printed copies of a few buildings to review for design cues.” I was glad that everyone seemed to take to the idea. Judy said she was talking to Mark about the project over lunch and they agreed that the designs should be consistent with the classic feel of Midtown. “I’m glad you want the project to have a historic theme,” Sandra said. “We should use vintage cabinets and vanities to give the units a rich feel.” I was relieved that everyone was on board. We agreed to meet at the project site to get a look at the property before the vacant store was demolished. After the meeting, I decided to go talk to Mr. Pendleton about our ideas. I stopped by Steve’s cubicle where he was working on the project’s exterior elevations in AutoCAD. “It looks like you’re off to a good start,” I said. “Ron, I’m excited about this project; your idea to base it on buildings at Temple University was brilliant!” “Thanks man.” “Don’t mention it, it’s a great idea!” “I’m glad you like it Steve; that makes my job easier.”

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What’s in in it for me? “I don’t like it; I love it!” he said. “Man, we should think about starting our own firm; everybody knows we’re the real brains around here.” “That’s good in theory but I like my steady paycheck.” “I’m serious man!” he stressed. “Just think about it.” “Okay, I’ll give it some thought but in the meantime I’m gonna go brief Mr. Pendleton on the meeting.” When I arrived at the executive suite, I wasn’t surprised to see Devon filing her nails with the phone glued to her ear. “LaQuan, let me call you back,” she said putting the file on her desk. After hanging up, Devon asked how the meeting went. “It was great; I can’t wait to tell Mr. Pendleton about the ideas we came up with.” Devon was clearly relieved that I would soon be out of her way and said, “Cool, I’ll let him know you’re here.” She buzzed Mr. Pendleton who replied, “Send him in!” “Well, you heard him,” she said reaching for the nail file. Mr. Pendleton opened the door as I was about to knock. “Come on in Ron!” he said eagerly. I was so excited about our concept that I started talking before I could sit down. I told him we wanted to give the development a Victorian feel and base the designs on buildings at Temple University. “Ron, I love it; you’ve outdone yourself this time!” “Thanks Mr. Pendleton but everyone’s input helped to complete the concept. It’s definitely a team effort.” “I guess you guys got a lot covered,” he said boasting a huge smile. “We’re planning to visit the property for a firsthand look at the site tomorrow. That should help us visualize how the

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Christopher Beckwith complex will fit into the surroundings.” “That’s a great idea Ron; having you lead the team was the right choice.” A proud smile covered my face as I thanked him. “I’m flattered you trust me to head such an important project.” “This isn’t about trust, you’ve earned it. I don’t doubt for one minute that you’re the man for the job.” “I have a great team; we won’t disappoint you.” He settled back and said, “I’m sure you won’t Ron.” There was no better time so I asked if I could leave early. “I just praised you for being the perfect team lead and you’re cutting out already!” he snapped. I was caught off guard and Mr. Pendleton noticed. “I’m just kidding Ron, is everything okay?” “I was planning to stop by the hospital to visit a friend.” He was genuinely concerned and asked, “Is it serious?” “I don’t think so; she fell and broke her leg yesterday.” “Ron, I don’t know what she did but you didn’t have to break her leg you big brute!” “It’s not like that,” I replied as we laughed. “I’ve become friends with one of the ladies at Krispy Kreme. The doctors wanted to keep an eye on her for a couple of days after a fall at work.” “I don’t have a problem with it since the meeting went well and everyone is on board. You’ve earned it!”

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What’s in in it for me?

ThirtyThirty-five I hate hospitals

he hospital wasn’t far from my job so I made it there in no time. I went inside and asked the gray-haired receptionist for Miss Ella’s room number. After a few pecks of her feeble fingers on the keyboard, she told me it was room 514. I was all nerves as I waited for the elevator. I tried not to worry but I wasn’t sure what to expect once I made it to Miss Ella’s room. Would she be in pain? Would she even be up for company? Either way, I was hoping my visit would help lift her mood. I stepped into the empty elevator, pressed the button for the fifth floor then used the time to send up a short prayer. I closed my eyes and uttered, “Dear Lord, it’s my prayer that you have mercy on Miss Ella and bless her with a quick recovery. In the name of your son Jesus I pray, Amen.” I finished the prayer as the elevator arrived at the fifth floor. I headed for the nurse’s station where I was directed to a room at the end of the floor. When I knocked on the door, the sweet voice from earlier invited me in. Miss Ella’s face lit up as she reached out for a hug. “Ronnie, it’s so good to see you,” she said. “I stopped by Krispy Kreme this morning and one of the clerks told me about your fall.”

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Christopher Beckwith “I guess I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going,” she said. “Now I’m laid up in this dad-blamed hospital!” A rush of anger swept her face when I let it slip that the clerk told me about her heart condition. “Which one of them big-mouthed hussies told you I had a bad heart?” she demanded. “I’m not sure of her name and I probably shouldn’t tell you anyway; I just want you to get better.” “Don’t worry sweetie, this ol’ girl is gonna be just fine!” “Well, that’s good to hear!” I said. When I asked how she was doing, Miss Ella sighed, “I’m doing the best I can with what I got!” She reached for the remote and lowered the volume on the television. They were watching The Parkers and the show had clearly contributed to her good mood. “That damn Monique sho’ is crazy!” she chuckled. I laughed along responding, “You can say that again!” She motioned to the woman sitting in the chair and said, “This is my niece Erica.” “Hey Ron, it’s nice to finally meet you,” she said. Erica’s voice was youthful but her demeanor was noticeably mature. Her locks were auburn tipped and her supple complexion was like creamy coffee. She wasn’t wearing any makeup which enhanced her beauty. Erica had the less than shapely build of a pudgy teenage boy with mannerisms that were nearly as masculine. The silver studs crowding her ears struggled to outshine the diamond that pierced her nose; she was definitely in touch with her afro-centric naturalness. All of a sudden, the cell sitting on the nightstand rang. Looking at the display, Erica said, “It’s Eric; he’s flying standby so I hope he was able to get a flight.”

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What’s in in it for me? Miss Ella seemed a little tense as Erica answered the call. “They’re always up to something!” she grunted. Erica offered me her chair as she walked over to the window. Straining to get a better view, she said, “Okay, I can see you now. I’ll be down in a minute.” “So he’s already outside?” Miss Ella asked. “Yeah, he said he only has one bag so he took MARTA. You know Eric; he just needs an excuse to go shopping while he’s here!” “That’s your brother,” Miss Ella chuckled. Erica said, “I’m gonna go meet him so he can put his bag in my car.” “Okay sweetie, Lord knows I ain’t going nowhere!” “So Eric’s her brother?” I asked as Erica walked out. Shaking her head, Miss Ella replied, “They’re twins; cut from the same cloth!” “Then I guess he’s concerned about you too.” “I told Eric he didn’t have to come down here; it’s just a waste of money!” “He’s probably just worried about you.” “I don’t know why they’re so fussy,” she grumbled. “So have they always been this protective of you?” “Honey, more like overprotective.” she teased. “They’re protective of me and each other. Erica was always watchful of Eric when they were kids; that girl treated him more like a son than her brother!” “Now that’s funny!” I said. She told me their mother, her sister Mary, was killed in a car accident when they were young. Miss Ella said she loved them so much, there was no way she was gonna let anybody else take them.

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Christopher Beckwith Then I made the mistake of asking about their father. “That drunk ain’t worth a cuss!” she snapped. “We ain’t heard from him since the twins were little and they’re better off because of it!” I figured it was best to drop the subject so I asked what Eric did for a living. There was no mistaking her pride as she talked about his job as a copy editor with The Washington Post. She said Eric received an internship with the newspaper after graduating from Howard University and was offered a permanent position six months later. She was also proud of Erica who attended Morgan State before taking a job as an actuary in Baltimore. Miss Ella said she was happy that Erica was transferred to Atlanta during a series of layoffs. “Eric was disappointed about Erica moving back to Atlanta; he really loved having her right up the road in Baltimore,” she said. “I’ll bet you just love having her here with you, huh?” “Yes Lord!” she sighed. “I don’t drive anymore and it’s a nightmare trying to run my errands on the bus. I don’t know what I’d do without her.” Girlfriends had replaced The Parkers and she was quick to let me know she wasn’t a fan. She sneered, “I can’t stand that damn show; don’t none of them stuck up bitches know how to keep a man!” Wishing she hadn’t lowered the volume, I didn’t want to admit that it was one of my favorite shows. A nurse came in followed by Erica and her sexy clone. Eric had the build of a track star with the same smooth complexion and warm eyes as his sister. His locks were shorter than Erica’s with the silky texture of his thick eyebrows and

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What’s in in it for me? moustache. His slacks clung to his solid ass as they flowed down his runner’s thighs. It was hard to believe she thought of him as her little brother. He walked over and planted a kiss on Miss Ella’s cheek. “Eric, you didn’t have to come down here,” she sighed. “I’ll be fine.” “Did you really think I wasn’t coming?” “Um!” she groaned. “It’s just a waste of money!” “That’s why I work everyday; there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for my girl!” Erica introduced me to her brother as one of Miss Ella’s favorite people. He reached out to shake my hand and said, “It’s nice to meet you Ron.” The nurse said she needed to check Miss Ella’s leg and asked if we would mind stepping outside for a moment. “Ron, are you hungry?” Erica asked. “Yeah, I am now that you mention it.” “Me too; you wanna go downstairs to the cafeteria to get something to eat while the nurse checks on Aunt Ella?” I wasn’t about to eat hospital food so I suggested we go across the street to Gladys Knight’s Chicken & Waffles. Smiling, Eric said, “Now ya’ talkin’; I haven’t eaten there in years!” Miss Ella’s eyes lit up as she asked us to bring her a slice of cheesecake. “You know you can’t have cheesecake,” the nurse said. “If you’re hungry, I’ll check on your dinner, okay?” Miss Ella scoffed, “Honey, I guess!” As we walked out, I shot her a wink to let her know the cheesecake was a done deal.

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Christopher Beckwith

ThirtyThirty-six Table for three?

was surprised by the light crowd when we walked in because the wait for a table was normally at least forty-five minutes. I was even more surprised that the hostess said she could seat us right away and asked us to follow her. We slid into the booth as she put the menus on the table and said, “Your server will be with you shortly.” Picking up my menu, I mentioned that I couldn’t believe the hostess seated us so quickly. “I can’t believe it either,” Erica said. “The last time I was here, I waited forty minutes for a table.” A waiter approached our table with the grace of a newly crowned Pageant Queen. He colorfully said, “I’m Dan, I’ll be your server this evening. Would you guys like something to drink before you order?” “I’ll have a Coke,” Erica said. Disappointed that they don’t serve alcohol, I asked for a glass of sweet tea and Eric ordered a Sprite. “Okay, I got it,” Dan said. “I’ll be right back!” Turning the conversation back to Miss Ella, Erica sighed, “I’m so glad Aunt Ella is gonna be okay. I was worried sick when I got the call about her accident.” Eric said, “I was worried too; I don’t know what I’d do if anything happened to her.”

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What’s in in it for me? I agreed adding, “She’s blessed to have both of you guys in her life.” Returning with the drinks, Dan asked if we were ready to order. Erica handed him the menu as she asked for the grilled salmon salad with French dressing. “Dan, is it possible for me to get the Midnight Train with a Buckwheat waffle instead of the original?” Eric asked. “Well, we usually don’t allow substitutions but I’ll bend the rules for you,” Dan said with a sultry twist to his voice. “Cool, let’s do it!” Eric replied. “What about you Ron?” “I’ll have the shrimp and grits with a house salad.” “And what type of dressing would you like?” Dan asked placing an irritable emphasis on the word ‘you’. It was hard not to laugh as I asked for honey mustard. “Coming right up!” Dan said before gliding away. I asked Erica how long she had been back in Atlanta. “Almost six years,” she said spinning her ice around. “I was really happy to get transferred back home.” “So Ron, where are you from?” Eric asked. “Winston-Salem; I moved here for an internship after I graduated from Hampton.” His eyes widened as he asked, “You went to Hampton?” I proudly responded, “Yes sir, I attended the real H. U.!” “Did you come up with that one all by yourself or was it in your orientation package?” I wanted to snap on him but all I could do was laugh; it actually was in my orientation package. Eric brought up the good times he had on our campus. He explained that his frat brother was from Norfolk so it was nothing for them to drive down on weekends.

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Christopher Beckwith When I asked which fraternity he pledged, he was quick to respond, “I’m born and bred Crimson and Cream yo!” “Okay, so you’re a Kappa.” “Yes sir!” he shot back with pride, “Did you pledge?” “Yeah, there’s nothing like that old Black and Gold!” Eric huffed, “An Alpha, huh?” “That’s right son but it’s the man that makes the color...” He cut in, “…not the color that makes the man!” Dan returned with my salad and a wooden peppermill. He put the salad down then asked if I wanted fresh pepper. Just to get under his skin, I dramatically said, “I’d love some!” then choked back my laughter at his reaction. He gave the peppermill a quick twist over my salad then walked away without a word. Turning the conversation back to college, Erica told me she didn’t have time for all that sorority shit. When I asked what she meant, she said, “I had other things on my mind; I was a basket case when I moved to Baltimore.” I couldn’t resist asking, “Other things like what?” “I was feeling things I hadn’t felt before or maybe I just ignored them. Either way, I was more than ready to get away from Atlanta for a while.” Then I asked her what was so bad about Atlanta. Erica explained that she was really close with one of the girls on her high school basketball team. She said they spent a lot of time together and would talk on the phone for hours. I normally wouldn’t be the least bit interested in a story about two women but she had my attention. “One day after basketball practice, she asked if I wanted to chill at her house. We were in her room listening to music and before I knew it, she had her arm wrapped around me. I

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What’s in in it for me? didn’t know what to do but I didn’t stop her; that’s when she kissed me.” All I could say was, “What!” Erica laughed as she explained, “It started with a closed mouth and then she slid her tongue between my lips.” I was getting into the story so I rested my elbows on the table and leaned in for more. I tried to control my excitement as I asked, “So what happened next?” “You won’t believe this but her mother walked in.” I gagged, “Say what!” “Her mother was shocked at first but that didn’t last; she was mad as hell! I didn’t know what to do so I ran as fast as I could; all I wanted to do was get out of there.” It was hard not to laugh since I could relate. They both were shocked when I said the same thing happened to me. “Okay, I gotta hear this!” Eric said. I told them the star running back at my high school was having trouble keeping his grades up so our coach asked me to tutor him. “We were at his house studying when he asked if I could keep a secret. I didn’t know what he was getting at but I told him I could. Then he asked even if I had sex with someone really popular.” I took a sip of my tea enjoying every second of their torture. I couldn’t believe the effect that the story was having on Erica and Eric was all ears so I gave in to their deadly looks. “He had my attention so I told him it depended on who he was talking about. ‘What if it was me?’ he asked. I couldn’t believe it when kissed me before I could answer. It was a simple kiss at first and then he slipped some tongue in. The kiss was disgusting; spit was in my nose and running down my chin—it was everywhere!”

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Christopher Beckwith They were laughing like crazy and I hadn’t even gotten to the drama yet. “I can relate to your story Erica because his mom walked in on us too,” I said. “I was scared to death!” The tables turned as Erica squealed, “What!” I couldn’t help laughing as I told them, “She called me a faggot more times than I could count!” We all were laughing when Dan brought out the food. He asked what was so funny causing us to laugh even more. Trying to catch my breath, I said, “Just a family story.” Dan lost interest and put the bowl in front of Erica as he said, “Grilled salmon salad for the lady.” Next he placed my plate on the table without a word. “And four juicy wings and a Buckwheat waffle for you,” he said as he sat Eric’s food in front of him. He deliberately directed his question to Eric as he asked if we needed anything else. Eric responded, “No, I think we’re good.” “Okay, let me know if you need anything.” We tried to remain quiet as he flipped the tray under his arm and twirled away. “Eric, he’s got it bad for you man!” I teased. Rolling his eyes, he said, “That dude is too soft for me!” “So, are you trying to tell me something?” “Maybe Ron, I’m still trying to feel you out!” “I’m sure he’ll tell you everything you wanna know in due time but as I recall, I was telling my story!” Erica huffed. “Okay Erica, so what happened with your teammate?” Tossing her salad around, Erica said. “The next day was Friday so I told Aunt Ella I had cramps and didn’t feel like going to school. The girl kept calling over the weekend but I wouldn’t talk to her. When I went back to school, I avoided

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What’s in in it for me? her like the plague.” “Damn, that’s crucial; how did she deal with it?” “She just gave up Ron. That’s when I realized how much I wanted her; I just couldn’t get that kiss out of my mind.” Eric sat across from us tearing into the waffle like a hungry bear but I was interested in hearing more. Erica mentioned that things changed in college. “I can’t tell you how many of the women on campus were cool with their sexuality; it really opened my eyes.” “So the women were after you, huh?” “I wouldn’t say that; I didn’t notice how open they were at first. I was nervous about being away from home not to mention learning my way around but that changed when I noticed this Goddess walking out of the registrar’s office.” Eric laughed as I said, “Now we’re getting somewhere!” I got a kick out of Erica’s excitement as she described the girl. “Ron, she had on a midriff that showed off her pierced naval and jeans that gripped her ass so tight I wondered how she got ‘em on. She was a knockout!” Eric snickered as he continued to demolish his waffle. When I asked if they hooked up, Erica said, “No, I just stood there like a hick while she flat out macked me!” Then it was her turn to torture me by sipping her Coke. “Well, go on!” I said. Eric laughed at how eager I was to hear what happened next. Thinking back on it, it was pretty funny. “She asked if I had the time so I looked at my watch and told her what time it was,” Erica said. “I was confused so she laughed and said I’d catch on sooner or later. As she walked away, I noticed she was wearing a watch!” I said, “Well Erica, sometimes life’s little signals can get

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Christopher Beckwith past the best of us.” “Yeah Ron, but I’m on top of my game these days!” I immediately asked, “Oh, so you’re a top?” Nearly choking on his waffle, Eric gasped, “Ron, that’s the funniest thing I’ve heard all day!” Erica snapped, “Whatever Eric!” Trying not to laugh, I said, “I’m sorry Erica but that was too easy!” “Um!” she grunted sarcastically. Then I said, “Seriously Erica, you seem comfortable with your sexuality now.” “It wasn’t a big deal after I came out to Aunt Ella.” They both laughed when I asked what that was like. “It was rocky at first,” she admitted. “I decided to come clean about my newfound sexual freedom while I was home for Christmas break. We’d been grocery shopping and I was helping put the food away. Aunt Ella was in a good mood so I figured what better time to tell her.” “So how did you break the news?” “It was easier than I thought it would be; I just opened my mouth and the words poured out. I told her I felt like I was attracted to women and hoped she could understand.” “Did she understand what you were going through?” “It was really hard for her Ron; I felt so guilty.” I told Erica that I felt the same way when I came out to my mom. “She was in denial at first but she came around.” “We’re lucky Ron; I have friends that haven’t spoken to their families in years because of their sexuality.” Eric seemed a little more relaxed as he asked her to tell me what Miss Ella had to say after she confided in her. “I realized my confession hurt her when I saw the tears

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What’s in in it for me? running down her face. Then Aunt Ella said, ‘Erica, you’re too pretty to be a bull dagger!’ It was hard not to laugh when I told her there were some pretty bull daggers too.” “You can’t get more old school than that!” I chuckled. Erica said, “Ron, we laughed about it for hours.” Eric mentioned that Miss Ella called him after she talked to Erica. “She admitted she had suspicions about her but convinced herself that Erica just had boyish ways.” Then he told me exactly what I was waiting to hear. “My phone rang as soon as I hung up. I wasn’t surprised that it was Erica; I was expecting her. She wanted to know how it went so I told her I convinced Aunt Ella to accept her no matter what. That’s when I opened up to Erica, I wanted her to know I could relate.” “So, are you trying to tell me you’re in the life too?” “What do you mean ‘…in the life too’?” I adamantly responded, “I mean in the life period!” Leaning back, he said, “Yeah Ron, I kick it with dudes.” “Sounds like a brotha on the DL to me!” I huffed. “I am on the DL Ron but not like you might think. I can be honest if I believe a woman can handle the truth but most of them can’t. I’m not about to apologize for who I am; I just happen to like men and women.” ‘At least he’s honest,’ I thought. Then he said, “I think more men would be upfront about their sexuality if society didn’t make such a big deal about it; you like what you like!” I had respect for Eric; I’d never heard anybody put it like that before. “Ron, most women are so delicate that I feel like I have to hold back when I really wanna go crazy. With dudes, I can

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Christopher Beckwith just tear it up!” “So, do you feel guilty about having sex with men?” “I used to but not anymore,” he said. “It is what it is!” I was digging Eric’s view on accepting his sexuality. When I asked if he felt guilty about having sex with women, he said, “No Ron, I feel like I’m supposed to be with a woman but most of the women I meet want more than I’m willing to give. Dudes just want you to beat it up and keep it moving; you can’t win!” I was so caught up in the conversation that I forgot all about the food; the shrimp sat on the table cooling off while the discussion heated up. I don’t date women but I explained to Eric that I understood. “The guys that I know on the DL say women want to be wined and dined but dudes want sex just as much if not more than they do.” “Yeah, they can just hit it and quit it!” he added. Erica snapped, “That’s what’s wrong with y’all dogs!” “Hold up Erica, I’m just trying to explain why some men do what they do!” I said. “I’m just saying Ron, why is it so hard for some men to make a choice and stick with it?” “Okay Erica, now you sound like a straight woman!” “That’s why I’m not straight Ron. Men always talk about women’s drama but y’all are the ones with the issues!” I had to admit that she had a point. Then Eric chimed in to confirm something I’ve always felt. “Some people think being gay is a choice but they don’t know what it’s like to be drawn to something you’ve always been told was wrong. That’s why it’s called a sex drive!” I was amazed at how passionate Eric was about the sub-

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What’s in in it for me? ject; he’d really given it some thought. Then he said, “Ron, you’ve been around long enough to know a man will do more in bed than the average woman.” I laughed as I responded, “Or so I hear!” “That’s why a lot of men fool around in the first place,” he said. “Let’s face it Ron, dudes give the best head!” “What makes you say that?” Erica asked. “Some women will only give you head if they think they have to; like it’s expected of them but with guys it’s a given. A brotha will suck you dry and beg for more!” I laughed when Erica stuck her finger in her mouth and made a gagging sound. “What?” Eric chuckled. “There’s so much more to romance than sex but men just don’t get it!” she said. “Erica, you have to admit we are different,” I confessed. “Um!” she grunted. “My frat brother used to say some guys were born gay and others were sucked into it,” Eric said. “I guess I just got sucked in!” I would have killed to have been a fly on the wall when he got sucked in. “I don’t feel guilty about it anymore,” he said. “I used to think my sexuality was a sin but I gave that up years ago. At the end of the day, I have to be comfortable with who I am!” I told Eric that I’d gotten past all that guilt and sin stuff too. “I was taught that sex outside of marriage was a sin but that didn’t keep me from wondering what I’d do if I never got married.” He said, “You’re right Ron but a lot of people just don’t get it.”

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Christopher Beckwith I mentioned how my life would be different if I wasn’t gay. “If I was straight with plenty of women, people would say I was just being a man; nobody would have a problem with it.” Erica added, “You’re right Ron, a lot of people feel like you can do whatever you want as long as you’re straight!” “I hate when people judge you for your dirt just so they can feel justified about their own!” I said. “Damned if you do; damned if you don’t!” Eric added. “I know a lot of people think being gay is wrong but it’s my issue and I have to live with it!” I explained. Erica sighed, “I just wish more people felt that way!” I opened Pandora’s Box when I said it was a lot easier for women to be open about their sexuality. “What do you mean it’s easier for women?” she asked. I put my hand up in defense asking her to hear me out. She folded her arms and said, “Okay, I’m listening!” I brought up the double standard when it comes to gay women. “I’ve wanted to have this conversation for a while because I see it all the time. It’s no biggie if two women hug, hold hands or even kiss in public but it’s different when it comes to guys. Men can’t hold a handshake too long without raising suspicion.” “Okay, I’m with you,” she said. I told her there was a good-looking guy at Hampton that appeared to be straight. “Just about every woman on campus wanted him until word got around that he was gay.” Eric’s expression implied he was hoping for a name but I figured it was best to keep that to myself. “He wasn’t in the closet; he just liked dudes. Most people were cool with it but a lot of the women on campus just couldn’t understand how

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What’s in in it for me? such a fine brotha could be gay.” Erica said, “I feel ya’ Ron; some people can’t understand how a woman can be feminine and still be a lesbian. As quiet as it’s kept, there are a lot of women out here on the DL too!” “I know but men are always considered the villain when it comes to concealing sexuality,” I admitted. Eric stressed, “The truth is, we just don’t want people in our business!” Dan returned and asked if everything was okay. “Everything’s fine; we’re ready for the check,” Eric said. Dan eagerly replied, “Okay, I’ll be right back!” I remembered Miss Ella and asked if I could get a slice of cheesecake to go. We laughed when he nodded and walked away without a word. “You’re right Ron; he’s not feeling you!” Erica teased. “Yeah, I know shade when I see it!” Eric added. Dan returned with the check and the cheesecake. He put them on the table and thanked us for dining with them. I was having so much fun irritating Dan that I couldn’t resist saying, “Thanks for having us.” He focused on Eric adding, “Make sure you come back.” As Dan walked away, Eric picked up the check and was surprised to see a slip of paper on the tray with his number on it. “Does he really think I’m gonna call him?” Erica laughed as I said, “Well Eric, you said most guys are willing to suck you dry. I think Dan just might be up to the challenge!” His smirk diffused the prospect of Dan going anywhere near his equipment. Erica stopped cold as we got up from the table. She ran toward the front of the restaurant shouting, “Oh my God!”

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Christopher Beckwith I noticed a woman waiting with open arms and a smile. I thought the handsome little boy at her side looked familiar and then it hit me; it was Ted Franklin’s wife and son. They rocked from side to side as they hugged. Breaking the hug, they continued to hold hands gazing at each other. Ted’s wife squealed, “Girl, I haven’t seen you since I left Baltimore; what in the world have you been up to?” “I moved in with my aunt when I transferred to Atlanta. I was only gonna stay until I got my own place but I’ve been there ever since; she won’t let me leave!” “You mean the aunt that came up for graduation?” Erica joked, “Yeah, that’s the one; or should I say the one and only!” Cynthia laughed as she nodded in agreement. Erica said, “Let me introduce you to one of her favorite people. Ron, this is Cynthia Riggs.” “It’s nice meeting you Ron; and Erica, it’s Riggs-Franklin now,” Cynthia advised proudly. Erica replied, “I guess that explains who this handsome young fella is.” Looking at her son, Cynthia asked, “Teddy, can you say hello to Miss Erica?” With a soft smile, he murmured, “Hello Miss Erica.” “Well hello Teddy; how are you?” In a squeaky little voice, he responded, “I’m fine!” Erica asked, “Cynthia, you remember Eric, right?” “Now how could I forget this sexy Devil?” Hugging her, Eric said, “Cynthia, you’re looking good!” “Thank you sweetie, I’m trying to keep it together!” He quickly responded, “Well, it’s working!” Ted walked in during the course of the happy reunion.

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What’s in in it for me? Cynthia wrapped her arm around him as she said, “Ted, this is Erica; we were good friends at Morgan State.” Ted hugged Erica and told her it was nice meeting her. He took a closer look at Eric and shouted, “Waddup frat!” Eric’s dry response of, “What’s up man?” seemed a little less than genuine. Caught off guard, Ted asked, “Don’t you remember me? We met when I came up with my brothers from Morehouse for Howard’s Homecoming.” Eric answered with a chilly, “Yeah, I remember.” Cynthia explained that Eric was Erica’s twin brother. “Damn, it’s a small world!” Ted replied. I wasn’t sure what to expect when she introduced me so I said, “Nice to meet you man,” before Ted could speak. A relieved look settled on his face as he responded, “It’s nice to meet you too man.” Distancing himself from the awkward moment, he asked how long the wait was. “The hostess said it should only be a couple of minutes; I was so caught up with Erica that I forgot about the wait.” Ted’s response was a cagey, “Okay, that’s cool.” Cynthia asked Erica how her aunt was doing. There was a sudden change in Erica’s mood as she said, “She’s holding her own.” Cynthia cautiously asked, “What do you mean?” She was shocked when Erica told her that Miss Ella was across the street at Crawford Long hospital. “What!” Cynthia gasped. Erica explained that her aunt fell at work and broke her leg. “She’s got a weak heart so they wanted to keep an eye on her for a couple of days.” “I’m sorry to hear that; is she gonna be okay?”

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Christopher Beckwith “Yeah, she’ll be fine; they’re just being cautious.” Cynthia asked Erica if she thought Miss Ella was up for company. “I can come over and say hello after we’re through with dinner.” “She’d love that; nothing makes her happier than having people around to talk to.” “Well, I’d love to see her!” Cynthia said. “We’re headed back to the hospital now. I won’t tell her you’re coming by; she’ll be so surprised.” Cynthia responded, “Girl, I can’t wait to see the look on her face when I walk in.” “That makes two of us!” Erica chuckled. Cynthia sighed, “I can’t believe I bumped into you.” “I can’t believe it either!” Erica said. “I’ll see you later.” Ted turned to Eric and told him it was good to see him. Eric’s reaction was a simple, “Yeah man.” We headed for the exit as they were shown to their table. Looking over his shoulder, Teddy waved as he sang out, “Bye-bye Miss Erica!”

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What’s in in it for me?

ThirtyThirty-seven Tell me more rica asked if I was coming back to Miss Ella’s room. That was a tough call because I was ready to head home. I realized it would be rude not to deliver the cheesecake personally so I agreed. Relieved that I decided to join them, Erica said, “Ron, we would never hear the end of it if you didn’t come back.” Eric added, “And trust me when I tell you that Aunt Ella would let you have it the next time she saw you!” Waiting to cross the street, I asked, “So Eric, Ted is your frat brother?” “Yeah, he’s a Kappa,” he said with a frustrated twist to his voice. I decided to let it go. Even though Erica was gay, I didn’t want to raise any suspicions about her friend’s husband. Crossing the street, I said, “Erica, it’s ironic that you and Cynthia were such good friends in Baltimore while Eric was hanging out with Ted less than an hour away in D.C.” She replied, “I don’t know if I should tell you this but…” I quickly asked, “Tell me what?” I almost tripped on the curb as she admitted, “My first encounter was with Cynthia. I’m not naïve when it comes to this lifestyle but I didn’t see that coming. My voice cracked when I asked if she was

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Christopher Beckwith trying to tell me that Cynthia was bisexual. “No Ron, she’s not bisexual,” Erica chuckled. I playfully asked, “Oh, so you seduced her?” Laughing, Erica said, “I think she was just curious, I can honestly say I was.” I was itching to hear more as we walked into the lobby so I asked how they met. “I met her during freshman year,” Erica said. “We lived on the same floor in the dorm and I had a crush on her.” I didn’t realize how eager I sounded when I asked, “So how did y’all hook up?” “She wasn’t a virgin but she’d only been with her high school boyfriend. I knew he was special because she talked about him all the time. At first, he called constantly but that didn’t last.” “No surprise there,” I said. “Tell me about it Ron! She confronted him about his lack of interest but his excuse was his heavy class schedule. When Cynthia pressed the issue, he finally admitted he was seeing someone else.” “Damn, I’ll bet Cynthia was hurt!” “She was devastated Ron!” Eric pulled out his Blackberry and drifted into a private cyber sanctum when we stepped in the elevator. I was glad it was empty because Erica was free to continue the story. “She was crying like crazy when I stopped by her room. I asked what was wrong and she said, ‘That son of a bitch broke up with me.’ I tried to comfort her but she just kept crying.” “So that’s when you seduced her!” She snapped, “Will you let that go, I didn’t seduce her!” Erica mocked her brother’s chuckling image in the eleva-

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What’s in in it for me? tor’s mirrored doors then laughed along with him. I hate being left out so I asked, “What’s so funny?” “He’s just being an ass; Eric was convinced that Cynthia was trying to turn me out.” I wondered how Eric got turned out but decided to save that conversation for another time. The elevator arrived at the fifth floor without stopping. Eric tucked his cell in his pocket and said, “I’m gonna go check on Aunt Ella while you finish your tale of two dykes!” Erica snapped, “Oh fuck you Eric!” “Now is that any way to talk to your brother?” he asked before slipping into Miss Ella’s room. “Ron, we’d better go in too; Aunt Ella will worry Eric to death if we don’t. And I’m not gonna tell you everything that happened with Cynthia; I’ve told you too much already!” I knew Erica was right but I couldn’t resist asking if that was the only time they were intimate. “Yeah, that was the only time; she hooked up with a guy on our basketball team after that so it never came up again.” Eric was comforting their aunt when we walked in. She forced a smile but there was no hiding her pain. Erica walked over and asked if everything was okay. Miss Ella responded, “Yeah, I’m just in a little pain.” “Did you ring for the nurse?” Erica asked. “I keep mashin’ this damn button but they ain’t been in here to check on me yet!” Then Erica asked, “How long have you been waiting?” Miss Ella grimaced from a jolt of pain as she moaned, “I don’t know, at least thirty minutes.” “That’s ridiculous,” Erica snapped. “I’m going out there and let those nurse’s have it!”

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Christopher Beckwith Eric suggested she stay with Miss Ella while he went to see what the problem was. “You’re right,” Erica sighed. “I’ll cuss their asses out if I go out there!” Heading for the door, he said, “Yeah Erica, I know.”

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ThirtyThirty-eight The truth about a secret

ric stood at the nurse’s station intent on finding out why it was taking so long for someone to respond to Miss Ella. His blood boiled as the nursing staff went on with their duties as if he wasn’t there. Finally, he’d had enough and shouted, “Does anyone see me standing here!” Without looking up from her paperwork, the nurse was slow to ask, “Is there a problem sir?” Annoyed by her smug attitude, it was all he could do to keep from lunging over the counter and grabbing her by the throat. The veins in his forehead throbbed as he told her his aunt had been ringing for a nurse but no one had come by to check on her yet. She replied, “Sir, your aunt is not our only patient!” Eric couldn’t believe his ears. He growled, “Look Julia, my aunt is the only patient I’m concerned about!” She cut her eyes at Eric making it clear that she was insulted by his reference to the ‘60’s television show. A doctor standing nearby came over to intervene before she could respond. “I’m Dr. Williamson,” he said. “Is there a problem?” After a deep breath, Eric told him that his aunt had been ringing for a nurse but no one had come to check on her.

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Christopher Beckwith “What’s your aunt’s name?” Dr. Williamson asked. Eric sighed, “Her name is Eleanor Washington.” Dr. Williamson said she wasn’t his patient but he’d send someone in to check on her right away. “Thank you Dr. Williamson, I appreciate your help.” Eric suddenly felt his cell vibrating. He pulled it out and saw that it was Todd returning his text. The message read: Hey baby. How’s your aunt? His response was: I’m about 2 get N somebody’s ass 4 ignoring her pain. I’ll call U lata. Eric pressed ‘send’ then tucked the phone in his pocket. As he turned to head back to his Miss Ella’s room, he noticed Ted and his family stepping out of the elevator. Cynthia called out, “Eric, how’s your aunt doing?” “She’s in a little pain but she’ll be okay,” he sighed. “That’s too bad,” Cynthia said. “I was hoping she would be in good spirits.” “Don’t worry; I’m sure your visit will help her mood.” Ted suggested they go on in to see Miss Ella. “I need to check my messages,” he said. “I’ll only be a minute.” Cynthia replied, “Okay, but don’t take too long.” Ted turned to Eric and asked, “So how you been man?” Eric stepped away from the nurse’s station with Ted following. Once they had distanced themselves, Eric snapped, “Don’t give me that bullshit Ted; what the fuck do you want from me anyway?” Ted decided the messages could wait and said, “I’m just trying to vibe with my frat brother.” Eric’s expression was anything but brotherly. “So we’re supposed to be cool now?” he asked, nostrils flaring.

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What’s in in it for me? Lowering his voice, Ted replied, “Come on Eric; it’s all good man!” “All good my ass; did you forget what happened?” Ted plainly answered, “That was a long time ago.” Eric bit his bottom lip as he tried to remain calm. “Mark brought half the frat to our room while Reginald was giving me head; he knew not to come in if there was tape was on the doorknob.” “So why are you mad at me; he was your roommate!” “I guess you’ve forgotten all of those wisecracks; my life was a living hell after that!” It was a struggle for Ted to remain calm as he replied, “I was trying to be on the low back then and I still am!” “Man, are you serious?” Eric snarled. “You can kiss my ass punk bitch!” “Look Eric, it might seem like I was being an asshole but I couldn’t let the frat know I was into guys. I’m cool with my sexuality now.” A disapproving sneer drove Eric’s point home as he shot back, “I wonder how cool Cynthia would think it is?” “Man, don’t bring my wife into this shit!” Ted warned. Eric snapped, “Are you threatening me?” Ted took a deep breath as he struggled to calm down. “I felt a little resentment from you earlier so I was hoping we could squash this. What did Ron say to you anyway?” “What’s Ron got to do with this?” Eric asked. Suddenly, it all made sense. He knew there was a reason for the cautious interaction between Ted and Ron at the restaurant but his slip up proved they’d met before. Ted scrambled to come up with an explanation. “Eric, I admit I do my dirt but…”

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Christopher Beckwith “Save it Ted, I wouldn’t dream of hurting Cynthia; just make sure you don’t!” Ted was clearly disturbed by the blunt advice. “I’m sure they’re wondering what’s taking us so long,” Eric said. “Let’s go inside.” Ted shrugged his shoulders as he replied, “If that’s how it’s gonna be then…” Eric cut in, “Yeah bruh, that’s how it’s gonna be!”

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ThirtyThirty-nin nine Meet the Franklins

iss Ella tried to conceal her pain but her balled fists and weak eyes sabotaged her efforts. It just didn’t make sense that she had been waiting over thirty minutes for a nurse and no one had checked on her yet. “Where in the hell is that nurse?” she squawked. Erica replied, “Try to hold on; I’m sure someone will be here soon.” Miss Ella’s stress eased as the door opened. Instead of a nurse, in walked Teddy guided from behind by Cynthia. A big smile replaced her grim expression as she sighed, “Lord, look what the cat done dragged in!” Cynthia hugged her and asked how she was doing. Miss Ella gruffly answered, “I’d be on top of the world if one of them lazy ass nurses would give me something for my pain!” Realizing Teddy was tickled by her foul language, she said, “Excuse me baby; pay no mind to my mouth!” Teddy continued to laugh his devious little laugh as his mother said, “Child, he’s heard a lot worse than that thanks to his daddy!” “I guess I don’t feel so bad now,” Miss Ella chuckled. Cynthia asked, “Teddy can you say hello to Miss Ella?” “Hello Miss Ella,” he muttered. Miss Ella cheerfully replied, “Well Hello Teddy.”

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Christopher Beckwith He cautiously offered a bashful smile without a word. She reached for her purse, rummaged around inside and pulled out a piece of peppermint. “There you go sweetie.” Teddy’s face was overrun with excitement. He took two steps then asked, “Mommy, is it okay?” Cynthia offered him a smile and said, “Yes, it’s okay.” Once he had the candy in his tiny hands, he tore into the wrapper and popped it in his mouth. Cynthia immediately asked, “What do you say Teddy?” Pulling the candy from his mouth, he muttered, “Thank you Miss Ella.” She warmly responded, “You’re welcome sweetie.” Erica said, “Good work Cynthia!” I was impressed too since it’s rare to see kids with manners these days. Cynthia was shocked when he didn’t budge. She was expecting him to retreat to his position attached to her leg but he had other plans. “It looks like someone has a new friend,” she said as he slurped away at the sweet delight. Miss Ella chuckled, “I can use all the friends I can get!” The door swung open allowing a calmer Eric to walk in. Just as it started to close, Ted walked in visibly frustrated. Miss Ella asked Eric what took so long. There was no hiding Eric’s frustration as he explained, “I had to show my color but I finally spoke to a doctor who said he would send someone in shortly.” “Are they gonna give me something for this pain?” “Yes Aunt Ella, I’m sure they will.” Cynthia was hoping to distract Miss Ella by introducing her husband. She took him by the arm and said, “Miss Ella,

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What’s in in it for me? this is my husband Ted.” After telling Ted it was nice meeting him, Miss Ella mentioned to Cynthia that she had a handsome young man. Ted responded, “Thank you Miss Ella; I try to take care of myself.” She shot back, “Honey, I was talking about the little fella but I guess you’ll do!” The room was filled with laughter with Teddy laughing the loudest. “You would have seen that coming if you knew her like we do,” Cynthia said. “I told you she was a whip!” A nurse walked in and asked how Miss Ella was feeling. “It’s about time you showed up; I hope you ‘bout to give me something for this pain!” Pulling a syringe from her smock, the nurse said, “Yes ma’am, I got it right here.” Miss Ella exclaimed a hearty, “Thank you Jesus!” The nurse injected the medication into the drip chamber of the IV and said, “You’ll feel better in no time; you may not want to hear this but the pain is a sign that you’re healing.” Eric tried to cheer her up adding, “That’s good news!” Miss Ella griped, “Honey, I guess!” The nurse said the doctor would be in shortly. Lowering her voice, she added, “I don’t wanna get your hopes up but you should be able to go home once we get your pain under control. Now you’ll have to follow the doctor’s instructions to the letter; do you think you can do that?” “Oh, don’t worry; she’ll do it!” Erica responded causing another round of laughter. Teddy laughed too but it was clear he had no idea why. Miss Ella said,” I’m feeling better already. Now let’s get

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Christopher Beckwith me home and in my bed!” Cynthia told Miss Ella they were gonna go so she could get some rest. There was no hiding Ted’s relief; he had been about as comfortable as a mouse cornered by a cat the entire visit. “Mommy, do we have to go?” Teddy asked. “Yes baby, we don’t wanna wear Miss Ella out.” As the medicine kicked in, Miss Ella said, “I’m feeling a little better now so y’all are welcome to stay.” “See mommy, she wants us to stay!” Teddy squeaked. Cynthia said, “Teddy, Miss Ella has had a busy day; I’m sure she needs to get some rest.” Miss Ella admitted, “I am tired; just make sure you come see me tomorrow.” Teddy quickly asked, “Mommy, can I come back too?” “Sure, we wouldn’t dream of disappointing Miss Ella.” Erica and Cynthia exchanged numbers while Miss Ella hugged Teddy and gave him a kiss on the cheek. I couldn’t believe it when Ted said, “It was nice to meet you Ron.” I kept up the charade by responding, “Same here man.” Eric’s expression was proof that he wasn’t fooled by our little performance. “It was good to see you Eric,” Ted said. Eric simply replied, “Yeah!” His tone had an underlying meaning but I just couldn’t figure it out. Ted held the door open for his wife and son. Waving frantically as he backed out of the room, Teddy said, “See you tomorrow Miss Ella!”

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Forty Forty The love of a lifetime ynthia gathered her coat at the collar to ward off the blustery wind as they walked out of the hospital. She held her husband’s hand as they waited at the traffic light thinking how blessed she was to have what most women dream of. They crossed the street and headed for the parking lot once the light changed. Ted unlocked the car with the remote then opened the door for Cynthia before strapping Teddy in. She was moved by the gesture since opening the door for her was something he rarely did. Cynthia was concerned with Ted’s silence as he backed out of the parking space. She considered pressing the issue then decided to relax and enjoy the soothing voice of Maxwell filling the car instead. Ted was relieved that the surprise encounter with Ron went smoothly but he was disturbed that his reunion with Eric hadn’t. It bothered him that Eric was so upset about the incident at Howard; Ted was hoping he would understand that he was only fronting for his boys. He stopped at the driveway of the English Tudor nestled in the Cascades. Ted hopped out to get the mail then hit the remote and eased the car into the garage. Teddy was asleep so Cynthia offered to take him up to

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Christopher Beckwith his room. “Okay,” Ted said then headed inside as she lifted their son from his car seat. When Cynthia walked in, she saw Ted flipping through the mail and asked, “Did anything come for me?” “Just your Macy’s bill and a Victoria’s Secret catalog; the rest is junk mail.” “Okay, I’ll take a look at them after I put Teddy to bed.” Heading toward the stairs, she glanced back and hinted that a fire would be nice. “A fire in August,” Ted mumbled. “What’s up with this weather?” He tossed the mail on the coffee table then went over to stack a few logs on the rack. Once the fire was lit, he went to the kitchen to open a bottle of wine hoping it would ease the stress from his brush with Eric. The fire had taken on a life of its own when he returned to the den. Satisfied with the fire, Ted collapsed on the sofa and reached for his wine. It wasn’t long before his thoughts drifted to the bullet he dodged earlier. He was relieved that Ron was discreet about their encounter and confident that their secret was safe. Ted’s manhood stirred as the image of Ron’s plump ass occupied his psyche. He closed his eyes as he massaged the knot hugging his leg and imagined Ron kneeling in front of him tracing the bulge in his pants with his fingertips. Cynthia stopped at the top of the staircase to watch her husband pleasure himself through his pants. “I know you didn’t get started without me!” she teased. Ted snapped out of his trance cutting the fantasy short. He loved his wife more than anything and wondered why it

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What’s in in it for me? was so hard to shake his desire for men. His recovery was a quick, “I just wanted to make sure I was ready for you.” “Well, as you can see; I’m ready for you,” she purred. Ted noticed how heavenly Cynthia looked as she floated down the stairs in a lavender negligee. Handing her a glass as she came over to sit next to him, he moaned, “You look incredible!” She softly responded, “Thank you baby.” Cynthia sipped her wine as they enjoyed the roaring fire. She rested her head on Ted’s shoulder as he returned the affection by kissing her softly. Once the kiss ended, she said, “I love you so much.” “I love you too baby!” Ted responded warmly. He cupped her breasts as the kiss resumed. She moaned as his sensual touch caused her arousal to grow. Then he said, “Let me show you how much I love you.” She responded, “I know you love me; now let me show you how much I want you!” Ted lowered his hands along the curve of Cynthia’s back until he reached her shapely ass. His lips met her neck as he caressed the firm globes. Cynthia managed to say, “Let’s take this upstairs.” Trying to shake his thoughts of Ron, Ted put his hands on his wife’s hips and followed her up the stairs. He was determined to make love to her in spite of the forbidden images clouding his head. In the bedroom, he wrapped his arms around Cynthia’s waist and kissed her softly. “I’ll be right back,” he said heading off to the bathroom. Cynthia lit candles to create a romantic atmosphere then

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Christopher Beckwith picked up the remote to locate mood music while awaiting Ted’s return. He emerged from the bathroom wearing red silk boxers and a devilish grin. Reaching out to his wife, he said, “Come to Daddy.” Looking into her eyes, he brushed Cynthia’s hair aside and told her again how much he loved her. She became the aggressor kissing him lovingly. Bothered that Ted was slow to respond, she reached down to massage his meat through the silky fabric. When that didn’t stimulate him, Cynthia sat on the bed and lowered his boxers to run her tongue along the lifeless lump. Still sensing no reaction, she closed her lips around the unresponsive log. It had little effect as he was unmoved by her marginal oral skills. Ted was inspired but his slumbering buddy refused to react. He couldn’t believe that just moments earlier his bone thrived when he fantasized about Ron but now it wouldn’t cooperate. Cynthia grew tired as her efforts went unanswered. She leaned back and said, “Baby, I’m sure you’re just tired.” Ted suggested they switch roles hoping his wife’s sweet nectar would restore his prowess. Cynthia sighed as he slid the nightgown past her thighs; she was on fire from Ted’s touch. He slipped his hands under her ass and pulled her to the edge of the bed. Admiring the prize, Ted realized that he was ready to make love to his wife despite his mental distractions as the thoughts of Ron faded. Ted kissed Cynthia’s thighs as he lifted her legs onto his shoulders then lashed his tongue against her glistening folds. His dong twitched as she raised her hips toward his hungry mouth; his confidence grew as the limp slab sprang to life.

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What’s in in it for me? Ted lapped at Cynthia’s moist treasure like a beast. Her sobs evolved into hoarse moans as she grabbed the back of his head thrusting her hips upward. That excited Ted even more as he realized he had eluded his psychological demons. Within minutes of the onslaught, Cynthia’s frantic cries implied she was having an orgasm. She breathed in a noisy breath throwing her head back as she clawed at the sheets. Ted lunged forward sinking into his unsuspecting wife. “Oh yes!” she cried out as he buried himself inside. She swooned in pleasure as his libido escalated. “Damn baby, you feel so good,” he moaned gripping the edge of the bed to brace himself as his legs quivered. He slid his arms underneath Cynthia’s thighs then lifted himself to his feet. She locked her arms around his neck as he bounced her on his imbedded pipe. “Give it to me baby,” Ted roared. Cynthia grabbed at his back begging him not to stop. Ted’s knees buckled as he laid her on the bed trying not to slip from her loving grasp. With his confidence no longer in question, he plunged into his wife in a loving rage. “Yes!” she screamed giving in to the passionate assault. Ted suddenly felt a slap on his ass followed by, “Stop it Daddy; I’m gonna tell Grandpop you hurt mommy!” Snapping out of their erotic state, they were shocked to find Teddy at the side of their bed crying. Cynthia struggled with the sheets as she tried to explain what was going on. “Your daddy wasn’t hurting me; we were just…” “But you were crying!” Teddy shouted. Ted quickly said, “I wasn’t hurting mommy; I was…” “Yes you were daddy, she was crying!” Deciding on a different approach, Cynthia said, “Teddy,

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Christopher Beckwith I need to tell you something very important.” He wiped his tears as he muttered, “Okay mommy.” Cynthia had often wondered how she would answer the world’s oldest question and there she was confronted with it out of the blue. “Teddy, you know how much I love your daddy, right?” He mumbled, “Yes mommy.” “When a mommy and daddy love each other, sometimes they go to bed and hold each other tight. The hugs can feel so good that they get excited.” Then she asked, “You know how loud you get when you’re excited, right?” “But it scared me; I thought daddy was hurting you!” “Your daddy wasn’t hurting me Teddy; he was showing me how much he loves me. I know you don’t understand but you will when you get older.” “That’s what you always say!” he grumbled. Deciding it was best to be honest, she said, “Come sit on the bed with mommy; we need to talk.” Teddy dragged his feet as he walked closer. Once he jumped on the bed, Cynthia asked, “Remember when you asked why Aunt Terri’s stomach got so big and I told you there was a baby in there?” “Yes,” Teddy mumbled. “And remember I told you that Uncle Vic took her to the hospital so the doctor could take Kenny out of her stomach?” Again Teddy mumbled, “Yes.” “I know it sounds strange but that’s how mommies and daddies make a baby; they do what you saw us doing.” Teddy cocked his head with a baffled expression. Ted realized he still didn’t understand so he explained, “That’s how the daddy helps the mommy put the baby in her

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What’s in in it for me? stomach, it’s called making love.” His eyes widened as he asked, “You mean I’m getting a little brother?” They were instantly blindsided by the question. Before they could respond, Teddy threw his arms in the air shouting, “I can’t wait to tell Grandpop I’m gonna get a little brother?” Ted pleaded with his son not to tell his grandfather that he was getting a little brother. “Why not?” he demanded. Trying not to laugh, Cynthia explained, “We don’t want to get Grandpop excited yet; we were just practicing.” “Aw man!” Teddy grumbled. “I want a little brother!” Ted explained, “Sometimes mommies and daddies have to practice before they make the baby. We’re not ready yet.” The disappointment on Teddy’s face was priceless. He pondered briefly then said, “Okay, I’m going back to bed; you and mommy keep practicing real hard!” They laughed as their son rushed off slamming the door behind him. “I guess he told us,” Cynthia said. Ted lustfully responded, “I’m all for it!”

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Christopher Beckwith

FortyForty-one Still no Randy

couldn’t believe how cold it was when I stepped outside. The temperature is usually blistering in August but the air was as nippy as a day in January. My ears were numb and my fingers were trembling; it just didn’t make sense. Distracted by the weather, it dawned on me that I hadn’t heard from Randy. It was strange because he always calls me back. Then I remembered turning my phone off while I was in the hospital. I was sure he had called so I checked to see if I had any messages. I hit the power button but the message indicator remained silent. Maybe he came across a piece and returning calls wasn’t a priority. I was overcome with an uneasy feeling. I looked up to see clouds swirling past the moon forming what appeared to be faces crying out in pain. I felt uneasy when I pulled out of the parking lot. I tried convincing myself that Randy was fine but it wasn’t like him not to call me back. I thought he might not be feeling well so I decided to stop by to check on him. I turned into Randy’s apartment complex and parked in front of his building. When I didn’t see his car, I realized he must be out. I decided to leave a note to let him know how pissed I was that he hadn’t called me back.

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What’s in in it for me? I took the pad from my glove compartment and wrote:

To the trifling whore that refuses to return my calls, I came by to blast your ass in person. You know you got it coming so stand up and face the music bitch! Mad as HELL! Ron When I made it to the top of the stairs, Randy’s neighbor stepped out of her apartment carrying a bag of garbage. “Hello Ms. Douglas,” I said with a smile. She slowly responded, “Ron, I’m so glad to see you.” The guarded look on her face grabbed my attention so I asked if everything was okay. She put the bag of garbage down as she answered, “Ron, I hope so.” “What do you mean Ms. Douglas?” Wringing her hands, she searched for words to explain what was going on. “I’m not one to pass judgment,” she said. “What you boys do in your home is your business.” I cautiously responded, “Okay, and…” “I’m really worried about Randy,” she sighed. “I heard him coming up the stairs with a man Wednesday night. They were a little noisy so I looked out my peephole to see what was going on.” By then, I was hoping she would get to the point.

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Christopher Beckwith Rubbing her cheek, she said, “Randy told his friend to be quiet because I might be watching and he was right, I was. That’s when that rascal stuck his middle finger up and called me nosey. It made me mad as the Devil; I started to tell him off right then and there!” “So what happened next?” “I decided to go back to bed; I figured I’d just wait and talk to Randy about it later.” “So why are you so worried?” “I usually hear Randy leaving for work. I still wanted to talk to him about it but I haven’t seen him since.” “That’s funny.” “What do you mean?” she asked. “I was just about to leave him a note; he hasn’t returned any of my calls so I came by to check on him.” “So you haven’t heard from him either?” “No, I was out of town and I haven’t talked to him since I got back. Have you seen his car?” “No Ron, now you see why I’m so worried.” I pulled out my phone and suggested we call his mother to make sure everything was okay. Pacing nervously, Ms. Douglas said, “I would’ve called Hattie already but I misplaced her number.” After a few rings, Miss Hattie answered the phone with a long, “Helloooo.” “Hey Miss Hattie, it’s Ron.” “Oh, hey Ron; how are you?” I decided on a simple, “I’m fine.” I tried to keep cool as I asked if she had talked to Randy. “I’ve left him a couple of messages and he hasn’t called me back.” “I talked to him Tuesday afternoon,” she said. “He told

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What’s in in it for me? me you went to Houston; how was your trip?” Thinking of Sam, I told her I was there on business but I managed to have a little fun too. She suddenly shouted, “Boy, turn that television down!” I laughed when Lil’ John John squealed, “Okay!” “Lil’ John John is playing that damn Xbox,” she sighed. “It’s so loud I can barely hear myself think.” “That’s okay; tell Randy I called when you talk to him.” “Okay baby, I will,” she said. “Bye now!” Ms. Douglas nervously asked, “So what did she say?” After a harsh sigh, I told her Miss Hattie hadn’t talked to Randy since Tuesday. “Since Tuesday?” “Yes, since Tuesday,” I said dazed by the circumstances. “At least I’ve talked to him since then.” “Ron, when was the last time you talked to him?” I blankly responded, “Wednesday afternoon while I was in Houston.” I wondered what we should do. Then I remembered the spare key Randy gave me and tried to convince myself there was no reason to use it. “I’m not sure if I should do this...” “Do what?” Ms. Douglas asked anxiously. I thought we were overreacting but I convinced myself it was the right thing to do. “Randy gave me a key to his apartment,” I said. “Maybe we should check on things just to be sure he’s okay.” She agreed so I reached for my key ring and located the key to Randy’s apartment. I opened the door and cautiously called out, “Randy, it’s Ron; are you home?”

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Christopher Beckwith There was no response. I stepped inside with Ms. Douglas on my heels. Everything looked normal until I noticed the bottles on the coffee table. Then the light in the bathroom got my attention. “Randy, it’s Ron; I’m just checking on you.” Still no answer. I headed to the bathroom hoping he had just forgotten to turn off the light before he left; then I noticed the crumpled washcloth on the floor. When I reached the doorway, I was stunned by the sight of Randy’s twisted body on the floor. I tried to move but my feet refused to cooperate. My heart pounded like a baseball striking a catcher’s mitt as I stood there trying to justify what I was seeing. Ms. Douglas cried out, “Ron is everything okay?” Ignoring the question, I tried to call out his name but my nerves held my voice hostage. When I checked for a pulse, the icy temperature of Randy’s skin sent chills up my spine. My eyes filled as I realized my best friend was dead. I tried to stand reaching for the vanity to steady myself. I looked at the mirror haunted by my reflection; I just couldn’t believe it was happening. My trance was shattered by Ms. Douglas’ high-pitched scream. I turned to see her in the doorway with tears rushing down her face. “Call 911!” I said. Filled with the painful regret of witnessing such a traumatic sight, her eyes begrudged the terrified expression they were forced to play a part in. When she didn’t move, I yelled, “Ms. Douglas, call 911!” She took a step back then rushed to the living room.

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What’s in in it for me? I heard her shouting, “There’s been a murder!” Seconds later, she screamed, “It’s my neighbor Randy!” My mind raced as I stood there trying to convince myself that my closest friend wasn’t dead. I was dumbfounded when the puddle of blood started to recede and Randy’s eyes opened. The faint sound of Ms. Douglas yelling the address faded as his murder replayed in reverse slow motion before my eyes. Bruce appeared behind Randy with a bloody knife. The blade slid into Randy’s back before turning sharply. Bruce’s lips pressed against Randy’s neck as the knife popped from his back. He embraced him as his head found a resting place on the deceiving shoulder then backed out of the bathroom leaving Randy alone at the vanity. Relieved that the hands of time had been turned back, I yelled to warn Randy. In a flash, the reality of his murder returned with his lifeless body lying in the puddle of blood. My eyes welled as I ran from the bathroom unable to handle the gruesome sight. “Hurry!” Ms. Douglas screamed before ending the call. Falling into my arms, she groaned, “They’re on the way.” It was hard to comfort her in my fragile state. We held each other for what seemed like an instant and an eternity. Two police officers rushed through the open front door. “We’re responding to a call about a possible homicide,” one of them said. “Is everything okay?” “No, everything’s not okay; my friend was murdered!” “I’m Detective Anderson,” he said. “Where’s the body?” I pointed to the hallway and told him that Randy was in the bathroom.” “Wait here while I check things out,” he said before cau-

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Christopher Beckwith tiously heading down the hall. “I’m Officer Matthews,” the other cop said. He pulled a pad from his jacket and asked, “Can I get your names?” I carefully responded, “I’m Ronald Davis and this is Ms. Douglas from across the hall. “And what’s your relation to the victim?” “He’s my best friend; his name is Randall Richards. Ms. Douglas described the incident on Wednesday night when he asked if we had seen anyone enter or leave Randy’s apartment. I told him the man sounded like Bruce based on her description. “Do you have a last name for this Bruce?” he asked. I reluctantly said, “No, I don’t.” “So how did your friend know him?” I told him we met Bruce at The Hideout and that I didn’t know much more about him. His voice was filled with a loathing disgust as he said, “Um hmm.” He asked us to wait outside while he talked to his partner. As we headed for the door, he added, “Be careful not to touch anything on your way out.” I wrapped my arm around Ms. Douglas as we made our way outside into the cold air. She murmured, “Ron, I just can’t believe this.” Staring off in the distance, I muttered, “I can’t believe it either Ms. Douglas.” She asked if I thought we should call Miss Hattie back. I suddenly went numb wondering if I would be able to make the call. I knew I didn’t have a choice so I reached for my cell and located her number. I stared at the screen with my thumb resting on the call button. I tried to press it but my hand was paralyzed.

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What’s in in it for me? I snapped out of my daze as Ms. Douglas shouted, “Ron, what are you waiting on!” I heard the distant sound of ringing and realized my reflex had forced me to press the button. I put the phone to my ear just as Miss Hattie answered with the same long hello. “Um…hey Miss Hattie, it’s…Ron…calling again.” “Oh, hey Ron; did you get in touch with Randy?” Instead of answering, I told her we really needed to talk. When she asked if everything was okay, I said, “I have some terrible news.” My face flooded with tears as I realized how hard it was for me to tell her about Randy. I sighed, “Oh my God, I don’t know how to tell you this.” “Tell me what?” she demanded. I couldn’t believe I was about to deliver the worst news possible to someone I’d never dream of hurting. “Ron, are you there?” Miss Hattie asked. “Yes, I’m here,” I sighed. Her voice was filled with desperation when she asked if everything was okay. “I’m at Randy’s apartment,” I blurted out. “Miss Hattie, he’s been murdered!” The nagging silence on the phone was shattered when it crashed to the floor followed by her frenzied crying. Lil’ John John asked what was wrong but she continued to cry without answering. He suddenly screamed, “Mommy, mommy; Mama Hattie won’t stop crying!” Her anguished cries ripped at my soul. Michelle shouted, “What’s wrong mama?” “It’s Ron; he said Randy is dead!” Michelle picked up the phone and snapped, “Ron, what

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Christopher Beckwith do you mean Randy is dead?” “Michelle it’s true,” I sighed. “I just found his body.” Then she said, “Ron, please tell me you’re kidding.” Her voice was barely audible as she struggled with her words. A flurry of words rushed from my lips in an attempt to explain what happened. “I’d been calling him ever since I got back from Houston but I couldn’t reach him. I ran into Ms. Douglas when I came by to check on Randy and she told me she hadn’t seen him in a few days. She was bothered by what happened the other night so...” Michelle cut in, “What happened the other night Ron?” My voice cracked as I said, “Ms. Douglas told me he had company Wednesday night. She said they were noisy so she looked out her peephole to see what was going on. She was gonna complain but decided to talk to Randy about it later. That’s when she told me she hadn’t seen him since.” Big John roared, “What the hell is going on down here?” “It’s Ron,” Michelle shouted. “He says Randy is dead!” Big John grabbed the phone and barked, “What do you mean my son is dead?” I suddenly felt timid as I replied, “I used my spare key to get in and that’s when I found Randy’s body.” Miss Hattie screamed, “What is he saying John?” Ignoring her plea, Big John shouted, “What’s happening now Ron?” “The police are in his apartment,” I said. “Y’all need to get up here now!” He assured me they were on the way then hung up. I was caught off guard when a portly man appeared at the top of the stairs followed by a younger associate carrying a metal case.

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What’s in in it for me? “I’m Officer Dobbs and this is my assistant Alan Smith,” he said. “We’re with the Atlanta Police Investigation Unit.” I told him my name adding, “I’m a friend of the victim and this is his neighbor Ms. Douglas; we found the body.” Officer Dobbs asked which apartment was Randy’s. I pointed to Randy’s door and told him there were two officers already inside. “Thank you Mr. Davis; I’ll need you to wait here while I speak with the officers.” He knocked causing the unlatched door to swing open from the weight of his knuckles. “Officer Charles Dobbs,” he announced as his horned-rimmed glasses led the way inside with Allen following. Ms. Douglas suggested we wait in her apartment. “At least we’ll have somewhere to sit,” she said. I wasn’t sure that my nerves would allow me to sit but I agreed and followed her inside.

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Christopher Beckwith

FortyForty-two two This can’t be

was oblivious to Ms. Douglas’ frantic pacing as I sat on the sofa. It was ironic that she suggested we come in to sit down because I was sitting and she was pacing. I just stared through the slightly open door totally unaffected by the breeze that slithered in. Ms. Douglas, on the other hand, struggled with the chilly air. Stopping mid-stride, she asked, “Ron, do you think we should close the door? It’s really cold outside.” Not wanting to miss anything, I answered, “I don’t mind the cold.” I felt my mouth moving but all I heard was silence. It was strange because I could hear Ms. Douglas’ voice clearly but mine was muted. She stopped pacing and asked, “Where are my manners Ron; would you like something to drink?” I mindlessly said, “No Ms. Douglas, I’m fine.” Again the sound of my voice was mysteriously absent. Heading toward the kitchen, she said, “I’ll put on a pot of coffee to take the edge off of the cold.” I figured it was useless to respond since either my voice or my ears were playing tricks on me; I just couldn’t figure out which. I watched as Randy’s apartment was transformed into a

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What’s in in it for me? carnal circus; the parade of Crime Scene Investigators was almost nauseating. It was as if I was on the set of a television drama but there were no lights, director or makeup crew; it was all too real. I went over to the window and saw thrill seekers congregating in the parking lot. I felt removed from the ordeal in my dreamlike state waiting for my alarm clock to rescue me but this time I wasn’t so lucky. That’s when I saw Big John’s Cadillac pull into the parking lot. Ms. Douglas returned with a searing cup of coffee. “Big John and Miss Hattie just pulled up,” I said. “Dear Lord,” she sighed. “You should go get them.” I agreed and rushed out the door scrambling down the stairs taking them two at a time. I heard Big John scream, “That’s my son up there!” When I reached the bottom of the stairs, he was arguing with an officer while Miss Hattie stood behind him crying her eyes out. I told the officer they were Randy’s parents and pleaded with him to let them wait with us. He reluctantly agreed then raised the crime scene tape so Big John and Miss Hattie could duck underneath. Miss Hattie rushed over like a frightened child. My tears flowed as I wrapped my arms around her; that’s when Big John joined us in a group hug that confirmed how much we needed each other. “Let’s go upstairs; I’m waiting with Ms. Douglas.” They agreed and followed me to the stairs. I said, “Don’t touch anything; not even the handrail. I’m sure I’m already in enough trouble for taking y’all upstairs.” Ms. Douglas met us at the door. For a brief moment, she and Miss Hattie stood in silence before taking each other in a

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Christopher Beckwith tearful embrace. Rubbing her back, she said, “Hattie, I’m so sorry.” Miss Hattie whimpered, “Betty, I just can’t believe this.” I pulled Big John aside to tell him I knew who did it. “Are you sure?” he asked trying to keep his voice down. I didn’t tell him every detail but I thought he needed to know we met Bruce earlier in the week. He listened closely as I told him Ms. Douglas’ description matched him exactly. Losing control, he snapped, “You mean Betty saw him?” The roar of Big John’s voice caught his wife’s attention. “Betty, did you see that bastard?” she demanded. “Yeah, I saw that son of a whore; I looked him right in the face and he stuck his middle finger up at me!” “You mean you talked to him!” Miss Hattie screamed. “No Hattie, I didn’t actually talk to him.” “Well, what then?” Miss Hattie pleaded. Ms. Douglas told them she saw Bruce through her peephole. She said Randy told him to be quiet because she might be watching, “…and that’s when he stuck his middle finger up at my door!” Big John snapped, “Did you tell the police?” Cutting in, I said, “Big John, we told them everything.” I was caught off guard when Detective Anderson called my name. “We’re in here,” I said motioning for him to come inside. He stopped in his tracks the moment he saw Miss Hattie and Big John. “This is Mr. and Mrs. Richards, Randy’s parents,” I said. He struggled to find patience as he snapped, “How did they get up here?” “I asked the officer downstairs if they could wait up here

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What’s in in it for me? with us. I hope you don’t mind.” “What!” he growled. “I could get fired for this!” I tried to justify my actions by telling him I didn’t think about that. “I’m sure you understand; they shouldn’t have to wait outside with strangers.” “You shouldn’t have done that sir; I could have brought them up here if you had asked. You need to realize this is a crime scene and protocol has to be followed; one slip and the killer could walk!” “I’m sorry Detective Anderson, I just felt bad for them.” “Well, it’s done now,” he huffed. “I’ll handle it!” With no concern for protocol, Big John shouted, “Just tell me you can find the asshole that did this to my son!” “I’m sure we can. We’ll have an even stronger case once we get the results from the lab; the evidence should lead us to a suspect. “But I’ve already told you who did this!” I said. There was no hiding his irritation. “Look sir, I know you have you own theory but we have to follow the evidence; we can’t arrest someone just because you have a hunch!” He hesitated when Big John asked about the evidence. “I don’t want to go into the details; it’s not important for you to know the specifics of what we found.” Big John barked, “Fuck that; I wanna know everything!” Detective Anderson reluctantly described the evidence. “Well Mr. Richards, we’re dusting some beer bottles for fingerprints, we have a washcloth that the suspect may have used and there were traces of what looks like semen on your son’s shirt. I’m sure we can get a DNA match.” Big John was disgusted by the straightforward description of the evidence. Just the thought of the events that took

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Christopher Beckwith place prior to the murder turned out to be more disturbing than he expected. Miss Hattie asked, “So, you’re just gonna let that bastard roam the streets in the meantime?” “I feel strongly about this case Ms. Richards; I’m gonna do everything in my power to find the person that did this. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to get back. I’ll let you know if we have any new developments once we’re finished.” I felt guilty about bringing them upstairs without asking so I followed Detective Anderson outside to apologize. I tapped him on the shoulder and said, “I just wanted to say I’m sorry if I’ve caused any problems. It’s really hard for them to handle the fact that Randy’s sexuality played a part in his murder.” “I know it’s hard but you have to realize this is a delicate case. Between you and me, it’s the kind of case that could get swept under the rug simply because Randy was gay.” I immediately replied, “You can’t let that happen!” “I won’t, I’m determined to solve this case if it’s the last thing I do!” I was relieved he was committed to solving the murder. The case could have been assigned to a homophobic cop that wouldn’t give a damn about a gay victim. “Thank you for being so kind,” I said. “This was still a murder regardless of the circumstances. I’ll do everything I can to see this through; that’s a promise!” I responded, “I’m gonna hold you to that!”

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What’s in in it for me?

FortyForty-three And so it is

he silence was deafening as we waited for an update. There was no denying the situation had taken its toll on us, especially Randy’s parents. They were devastated and the worst part was Randy didn’t deserve to die. Miss Hattie fell to her knees as the coroner wheeled the gurney out of Randy’s apartment. “My baby, my baby!” she wept. Big John was reduced to tears as he tried to comfort his wife. His whimpers became a full-blown wail as he faced his son’s death. Ms. Douglas also cried as if she had lost a son. She really cared for Randy and now Bruce had ripped him away. I tried to look away from the motionless body. I thought if I couldn’t see him, it wouldn’t be true. The problem was I couldn’t tear myself away; my eyes were locked on him. Miss Hattie crawled toward the door screaming, “I have to see him! That’s not my baby! That’s…not…my…baby!” I went over to help Big John with his grief-stricken wife. “Don’t do this Hattie!” he sobbed. “Randy was a wonderful person,” she yelled. “He didn’t deserve this!” We were finally able to lift her from the floor with Ms. Douglas’ help.

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Christopher Beckwith Big John said, “Hattie, you need to sit down.” She cried out, “I don’t wanna sit down, I wanna see my baby…I wanna see my baby!” Miss Hattie collapsed just as we got her to the sofa. Rubbing her back, Ms. Douglas said, “Hattie, you gotta be strong; do it for Randy.” I was shocked by Detective Anderson’s grim expression when he walked into Ms. Douglas’ apartment; it was as if he had known Randy personally. He assured Randy’s parents that he was committed to solving the case. “Don’t worry,” he said, “I’m gonna find the nigga that did this!”

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What’s in in it for me?

FortyForty-four Where am I

watched Big John and Miss Hattie follow the caravan of police cars. I got in my car, started the engine and backed mindlessly out of the parking space. I was quickly forced out of my grievous daze by the shrill horn of a car swerving to avoid crashing into me. ‘Okay Ron, you’ve got to pull it together!’ I thought. I headed toward the freeway unsure if I could remember how to get home. My car seemed to drive itself as I sat there battling the image of Randy’s motionless body. The tears flooding my face were a nagging distraction as I drove past my exit. I decided to take the next exit as I wondered how I could make such a stupid mistake. My mom crossed my mind as I was waiting for the light to change. I knew I needed to tell her what happened but I didn’t want to call so late. A blaring horn forced me back to reality as I noticed the other cars pulling away from the intersection. The driver behind me sped around making sure I was aware of his extended middle finger. I decided to ignore him as I joined the flow of traffic. I located my parent’s number then stared at the screen unable to make the call. I knew it had to be done so I pressed the button and waited for the call to connect. Each ring sent

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Christopher Beckwith an icy chill up my spine as I wondered how I would explain what happened. My mother answered in a sleep-tinged voice on the third ring. I knew she had been asleep which made telling her the news even harder. “Hello Ma,” I said. “I’m sorry to call so late.” “Ronnie, are you crying?” she asked. “What’s wrong?” I battled my tears as I replied, “I don’t know how to tell you this so I’ll just say it. Randy was murdered; I found his body tonight.” My mom’s silence only intensified my misery. “Oh my God Ronnie!” she sighed. “What happened?” My heart sank as I realized I would have to go through the story again. I told her I hadn’t heard from Randy since I got back from Houston so I went by to check on him. “So what happened when you got there?” she asked. I was a little more relaxed since I wasn’t on the freeway; that made it easier to rehash the story. “I was about to leave a note for Randy when I bumped into his neighbor,” I said. “It bothered me when she said she hadn’t seen him in days.” I heard my dad ask, “Liz, who in the hell is that calling so late?” “It’s Ronnie; he just told me Randy was murdered.” My dad groaned, “Elizabeth, you’ve got to be kidding!” “Albert, I wish I was,” my mom replied soberly. She asked if Randy’s neighbor seemed upset when she told me she hadn’t seen him. “Yeah Ma, she was a nervous wreck.” Then she asked how I found Randy’s body. “We thought something might be wrong so we used my

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What’s in in it for me? spare key to go in and that’s when we found him.” “Oh my God Ronnie!” she sighed. “That’s terrible.” “Yeah Ma; other than losing you or dad, I can’t think of anything worse.” My mother said, “Ronnie, I can’t believe this!” Tears spilled from my eyes as I sighed, “I can’t believe it either. I don’t know what I’m gonna do; I miss him already.” Trying to comfort me, she said, “Go ahead; let it all out.” “I feel much better now that I’m talking to you.” “So do the police have any suspects?” she asked. I took a deep breath then told her I knew who did it. “Ronnie, are you sure?” Before I could reply, she added, “If so, you have to do everything you can to help the police catch that fool before he hurts someone else.” I hadn’t thought that far ahead but she was right; I had to help them stop this beast. My dad’s voice was more alert as he asked my mom if I knew who did it. “He says he does Albert,” she sighed. “I’m so worried!” Before I knew it, my dad was on the phone asking if I was sure I knew who the killer was. “Yeah dad, I know who it is. I told Randy that Bruce was bad news but he wouldn’t listen.” “You mean y’all knew him!” he snapped. “No, he’s just some fool that caught Randy’s eye. I didn’t expect this but I’m not surprised.” “You never know what a fool like that is capable of.” “Well dad, I guess I know what he’s capable of now.” I heard my mother telling him that she couldn’t imagine what Miss Hattie and Big John must be going through. My dad asked, “Have you talked to Randy’s parents?”

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Christopher Beckwith “Yeah, I’ve talked to them. I called them after we found the body; they’re devastated!” “I feel so bad for them,” he said. My dad asked me to hold on and the next thing I knew, my mom was back on the phone asking how Miss Hattie and Big John were holding up. I repeated, “They’re devastated Ma!” “I’ll call Hattie tomorrow to see if there’s anything I can do to help,” she said. “Ma, I’m sure Miss Hattie would appreciate that.” Then she asked, “So where are you now?” “I’m on my way home. I know it’s late; I’ll call you later to let you know what’s going on with the case.” “Be careful Ronnie, y’all are dealing with a lunatic.” “He’s the one that needs to be careful,” I said. “He killed my friend and I won’t rest until he pays for it!”

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What’s in in it for me?

FortyForty-five Someone to care for me

finally got out of my car after sitting outside for Lord knows how long. I felt guilty because I didn’t do more to convince Randy that Bruce was trouble. He just couldn’t understand that he didn’t have to settle for the first piece of trash that came along. Sam crossed my mind as I dragged myself up the stairs to my apartment. I didn’t care what time it was; I needed to talk to him. I knew he wouldn’t mind the call no matter how late it was. Then I remembered the time difference so the decision was easy. Once I was in my bedroom, I collapsed on the bed and pulled my phone from my pocket. I sighed as I located Sam’s number then waited to hear his voice. He answered with a sluggish, “Hello.” I softly said, “Hey baby.” There was a smile in his voice as he replied, “Hey you.” My smile was a welcome change from my earlier tears as I asked if he was asleep. “Naw, I couldn’t sleep; I’m laying here surfing channels. As a matter of fact, I was thinking about you.” I was intrigued so I asked, “Oh really?” “Yeah, the evidence is on this towel!” he answered in a devilish tone. When I asked if he was serious, he responded,

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Christopher Beckwith “Do you want the truth?” I replied, “Of course I do.” “Okay Ron, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. I was sitting here watching television when Lil’ Sammy woke up begging for attention so I had to beat him into submission!” “All right then, you do you!” I teased. He playfully replied, “I was actually doing us!” I laughed as I said, “I knew I needed to talk to you; I’m felling better already.” Sam’s tone turned serious as he asked what was wrong. “One of the worst things that could possibly happen; my best friend Randy was murdered.” “That’s terrible!” he gasped. “How did you find out?” My stomach sank as I said, “I found his body.” When he didn’t respond, I asked “Are you still there?” “Yeah, I’m here; I just wasn’t expecting that.” His voice had a calming effect that helped me relax. “I was worried because I hadn’t heard from Randy since I got back from Houston,” I explained. “Is that the guy you were talking about yesterday?” “Yeah, that’s the one. I didn’t think much of it at first but when I went by to check on him, his neighbor said she hadn’t seen him in days. She was worried so we used my spare key to get in and that’s when we found his body.” “I’m sorry Ron; that must have been terrible.” I got a little choked up as I told him I’d never seen anything like it. “Ron, I can’t imagine what it was like finding him like that,” he said. “I warned Randy about Bruce before I came to Houston but he just wouldn’t listen.”

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What’s in in it for me? He quickly asked, “Who is Bruce?” “He’s the bastard that killed Randy!” Sam said, “Ron, that’s a serious accusation.” “I know but all the signs point to him.” He said, “Baby, I don’t mean any harm but what makes you so sure?” “We met him the night before I came to Houston. He’s a street hustler with a history of preying on guys to get what he wants. I told Randy he was bad news and he seemed to agree but I guess he was just telling me what he thought I wanted to hear.” “Okay Ron, but that still doesn’t prove he did it.” “I know but I felt his spirit all over Randy’s apartment. I know that doesn’t prove anything but my gut tells me he’s the one!” “I wish I could be there to hold you,” Sam said. My spirits lifted as I told him that made two of us. When he asked if I was gonna be okay, I replied, “I’ll be fine; I guess I don’t have much choice.” I suggested we call it a night but Sam stopped me before I could say goodbye. “I love you Ron and I’ll be praying for Randy’s family.” “Thanks Sam, I love you too!”

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FortyForty-six That’s what I’m here for il’ John John raced into the kitchen for his morning bowl of cereal. He stopped in his tracks once he saw Miss Hattie, Big John and his mother at the kitchen table. His confused expression spoke volumes as he wondered what was going on. “Mommy, why you and Paw Paw still home?” he asked. “Y’all ‘sposed to go to work on Saturday!” Michelle forced a smile as she replied, “We’re not going to work today.” His eyes widened as he asked, “Is it a holiday?” “No, it’s not a holiday; we have something important to talk about.” With that out of the way, Lil’ John John asked if he could have some cereal. Michelle sweetly responded, “Sure baby.” She reached for his Spiderman bowl as he eagerly sang the theme song. After filling the bowl, she asked, “You wanna go watch cartoons while you eat your breakfast?” “Okay,” he squeaked before dashing off. Miss Hattie’s eyes watered as she sighed, “I don’t know how we’re we gonna tell him what happened.” Big John said, “Let me handle it, I’ll take him out to the

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What’s in in it for me? front porch so we can have a little talk.” Breathing a sigh of relief, Michelle said, “Thanks daddy, I’m sure you’ll find the right words to explain this.” Big John forced a smile and said, “That’s why I’m here!” The spoon bounced in the empty bowl as Lil’ John John rushed into the kitchen. Holding the bowl up for inspection, he announced, “I’m finished!” Looking down at her son’s innocent little face, Michelle asked, “Did you chew you cereal or did you just swallow it?” “I chewed it and I swallowed it!” he proclaimed. Stress flowed from her body as she released a harrowing laugh. As her laughter faded, she told her son to put his bowl on the counter. “Your grandfather wants to take you outside for a talk.” He turned to Big John and asked, “Is it a secret?” “No, I just wanna have a talk with my little man.” Lil’ John John ran over and put the bowl on the counter. “You need a jacket,” Michelle said. “It’s cold outside.” “Okay mommy!” he shouted as he rushed off. Michelle sighed, “I hope he’ll understand all this.” “John, be easy with him,” Miss Hattie whimpered. “I will,” Big John said. “I hate I have to talk to him about Randy but it’s gotta be done.” Lil’ John John darted across the kitchen and grabbed Big John by the hand. “I’m ready Paw Paw, let’s go!” Big John smiled and said, “Okay little man.” Lil’ John John literally pulled Big John out to the front porch. He plopped down on the steps then motioned for his grandfather to take the spot next to him. He quickly asked, “So what do you wanna talk about?” “Well lil’ man, we need to talk about Uncle Randy.”

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Christopher Beckwith Lil’ John John anxiously asked, “Is he coming to visit?” The tone of Big John’s voice turned somber as he told his grandson Randy was never coming to visit again. Lil’ John John’s face was overrun with panic as he asked, “Is he mad at us?” With a slight chuckle, Big John answered, “No, he’s not mad at us; Randy loved us.” Tears spilled from Lil’ John John’s eyes when he asked, “Paw Paw, why is Uncle Randy never coming back?” Big John tried to hold back his tears as he put his arm around his grandson. “Remember when we went to church to say goodbye to Papa Fred?” he asked. Lowering his head, Lil’ John John answered, “Yes, they put him in that big hole in the ground and covered him up with dirt.” “That’s right, and remember I told you he was going to Heaven to live with Jesus?” Lil’ John John softly replied, “Yes, I remember.” “Well, Uncle Randy is going to live with Jesus too.” Lil’ John John shrieked, “But Papa Fred was old; why do Uncle Randy have to go to Heaven to live with Jesus?” Instead of correcting his grandson, Big John responded, “Jesus has some work for Uncle Randy to do in Heaven.” Lil’ John John’s tears flowed freely as he shouted, “Don’t let him go live with Jesus; I want him to stay here with us!” Big John said, “Me too lil’ man but it’s not up to me.” Their neighbor, Jerry, was walking up the sidewalk with a puppy on a leash. Picking up the puppy and heading toward the porch, he called out, “Hey John!” Thankful for the distraction, Big John said, “Hey Jerry.” Noticing Lil’ John John’s tears, Jerry asked if everything

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What’s in in it for me? was okay. Lil’ John John was drawn from his misery as he wiped his eyes and asked, “Is that your puppy Mr. Patterson?” “Well, sort of, do you remember my daughter Nicole?” Lil’ John John answered, “Yep!” Big John corrected, “It’s yes Lil’ John John, not yep.” “I mean yes,” Lil’ John John stated. “She gave me a truck for my birthday.” “Well, her dog Shelley had puppies and we thought you might want one,” Jerry said. Lil’ John John’s sadness faded as he asked, “You mean it Mr. Patterson?” Patting him on the top of his head, Jerry said, “He’s all yours if it’s okay with Big John.” He removed the leash and put the squirming puppy on the ground. Eager to acquaint himself with his new pal, the puppy rushed up the stairs toward Lil’ John John. In a burst of excitement, he asked, “Paw Paw, can I keep him please?” Big John responded, “It’s fine with me as long as your mommy says it’s okay.” Cuddling the cute little puppy, Lil’ John John giggled as his face was blanketed with an affectionate tongue bath. Jerry said, “I think he likes you Lil’ John John!” “I know he likes me!” he sang out with conviction. That got a chuckle out of Big John and Jerry. Lil’ John John anxiously asked, “What’s his name?” With the dynamism of a circus announcer, Jerry replied, “His name is Hercules!” Lil’ John John giggled, “That’s a funny name for a dog.” Laughing, Jerry said, “His name is Hercules because he’s

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Christopher Beckwith gonna be big and strong someday.” Lil’ John John squealed, “I’m little and Hercules is little so we can grow up together!” Jerry chuckled, “That’s right!” “Let’s go meet mommy!” Lil’ John John squeaked as he jumped up and ran to the front door. Big John and Jerry couldn’t help laughing when he flung the screen door open and ran inside before it slammed shut. Jerry sat in the spot vacated by Lil’ John John and asked, “John, is everything okay? You seem a little down.” “We’re going through a rough time right now,” he said as a tear slid down his cheek. “Do you wanna talk about it?” Jerry asked. “You’re gonna hear about it sooner or later so you might as well hear it from me; Randy was murdered.” Clearly shaken by the news, Jerry groaned, “John, I’m so sorry; how did it happen?” Big John avoided the details as he said, “Jerry, we’re not exactly sure what happened; everything’s still a little crazy.” “I can’t imagine what y’all must be going through John. I’m sure Hattie is devastated!” Big John sighed, “Jerry, this has destroyed her!” Jerry was quick to say, “Don’t hesitate to let me know if there’s anything I can do to help.” “Thanks Jerry, that means a lot,” Big John said. “Keep us in your prayers.” Michelle stepped outside carrying Hercules. She greeted Mr. Patterson then asked her father if he told his grandson he could have a puppy. With a blameless expression, Big John responded, “Jerry walked up with the puppy while I was having my talk with

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What’s in in it for me? Lil’ John John. He was so happy when Jerry offered him the puppy there was no way I could say no.” She said, “Okay, but you’re gonna help him take care of this little fur ball.” Hercules raced off to find Lil’ John John once Michelle put him down inside the front door. Jerry extended his hand but Big John stretched his arms out for a hug instead. “Just remember I’m here if you need me,” Jerry said. “Thanks Jerry, you’ve already been a big help.” “Don’t mention it!” he replied.

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FortyForty-seven A day at the park

was lying in bed oblivious of time with my bloodshot eyes fixed on the ceiling. I tried to ignore my cell dancing on the nightstand but I couldn’t stand it anymore. Then I noticed the bright red display of my alarm clock indicating 11:48 AM and remembered the meeting with my team at the project site. I wasn’t surprised when I looked at the phone’s display; sure enough, it was Steve calling. I answered with a listless, “Hello.” “Ron, where are you?” he shouted. “We’ve been waiting for over forty-five…” I cut in, “Steve, I found my best friend dead last night.” “Man, quit fucking around; if you’re late just sat that!” “I’m serious Steve, my friend Randy was murdered.” “You mean the big dude?” I simply replied, “Yeah, that’s the one.” He immediately asked, “What happened?” I was relieved that our new bond allowed me to be open about the situation. “You won’t believe this but he was killed by a dude he met at the club.” Steve barked, “What the fuck!” “Yeah man, the guy stabbed him in the back!” Then it hit me how ironic it was that Randy was literally

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What’s in in it for me? stabbed in the back. “Ron, I’m really sorry man. Are you gonna be okay?” I managed to answer, “Yeah Steve, I’ll be fine.” “You don’t worry about meeting us,” he said. “I’m sure we can handle it.” “Thanks man, I really appreciate that.” I was moved when he added, “Let me know if I can do anything to help you get through this.” I promised I would then hit the disconnect button. I turned on the TV and flipped to VH-1 Soul hoping the videos would help my mood. I walked to the mirror praying that I didn’t look as bad as I felt but I was disappointed when it validated my fears. I was startled when the picture on my dresser came to life. It was a snapshot of Randy straddling one of the fingers of The Awakening statue at Haynes Point in D.C. I laughed at Randy bucking up and down on the monstrous hand. Then I remembered telling him that he had bitten off more than he could handle. He shouted from the frame, “Bitch, I ain’t found one yet that I couldn’t handle!” I raced to the bathroom, soaked a washcloth and raised it to my face hoping the steam would help calm my nerves. I heard the intro of Jill Scott’s ‘Golden’ and smiled as I remembered that it was one of Randy’s favorite songs. When I walked into the bedroom, I was gripped by the sight of him walking hand in hand with Jill as she belted the tune. I stood there fixed on the screen with tears pouring from my eyes thinking, ’I gotta get out of here!’ I needed to clear my head so I threw on the first thing I could find, grabbed a jacket and headed for my car.

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Christopher Beckwith I sped out of the parking lot with no idea of where I was going. For whatever reason, I felt beckoned by the tranquility of Piedmont Park so I headed toward Midtown. It was cold but I was convinced the picturesque scenery was the perfect escape from the disturbing memories I left at home. It wasn’t that the park didn’t have its share of memories but at least I wouldn’t be stuck in my apartment. I found a parking space then hopped out of my car and headed across 10th Street. I was ready for some downtime at the park and was reassured of my decision to go there the instant my feet hit the grass. It turned out to be the peaceful getaway I was hoping for. There was no swarming crowd for one of the festivals, no loud music from the free concerts and no kids chasing dogs or vice versa. I was joined only by an occasional jogger and I was fine with that. I admired the towering trees as the breezes ruffled their leaves and wondered how the world could be such a beautyful place and yet some of the people in it were so cruel. I was surprised to see Richard jogging in my direction. The calming effect of a familiar face was instantly disrupted once I realized I’d have to tell him about Randy. His pace slowed to a relaxed trot as he approached me. He jogged in place offering a breathless, “Hey…Ron?” I wasn’t sure where to start. I didn’t want to just blurt it out so I told him we needed to talk. Richard bent over and rested his hands on his knees. He tried to catch his breath panting, “Don’t sweat…it…Ron. I… could use…the break!” I forced myself to laugh as we walked to a nearby bench. He collapsed on it as his breath became more regulated.

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What’s in in it for me? “What brings you to the park, looking for a piece?” What he didn’t realize was sex was the last thing on my mind. I didn’t want to spring the news on him too abruptly so I told him I just needed to clear my head. “Must be nice,” he said. “I’m trying to get some exercise before I punch the clock; I gotta be at work by three.” I wasn’t sure how to tell him but I knew I had to. As I pondered my approach, he asked, “Are you okay?” I reluctantly replied, “Richard, I don’t know how to tell you this so I’ll just say it; Randy was murdered.” He looked at me like I was telling him I’d been abducted by aliens. “But I just saw Randy the other night at The Cock Pit!” “Was he with that guy named Bruce?” I asked. The blank look on his face confirmed my suspicions. “You don’t have to answer; your expression says it all.” Tears spilled onto Richard’s face as he stared off into the distance. I could barely hear him when he uttered, “We tried to talk him out of leaving with Bruce but he wouldn’t listen.” “I know it hurts Richard but it wasn’t your fault.” Unmindful of what I said, he sighed, “Randy was set on hooking up with that nigga!” “You know there’s no talking him out of something once his mind is made up.” He cried out, “Why did we let him take Bruce home?” I tried to comfort Richard but he just continued to cry. He struggled to pull it together as he asked how I found out. “I left a message for Randy but he never called me back. When I went by to check on him, he didn’t answer so I used my spare key and that’s when I found his body.” Richard jumped up and pulled out his phone. He dialed

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Christopher Beckwith frantically babbling that he needed to call Bryan. He didn’t bother to say hello when Bryan answered, he just screamed, “That muthafucka killed Randy!” I felt a chill as I wondered what Bryan’s response was. Richard shouted, “Bitch, it’s not a joke! I’m at Piedmont Park with Ron now; he told me he found Randy’s body last night!” Richard paced as Bryan’s muffled words escaped the phone. Seconds later, he spat back, “He says Bruce did it and I’m not surprised!” More of Bryan’s vague words seeped from the phone. “I don’t know any of the details but Ron’s right here. I’ll let him tell you.” I tried to remain calm as Richard handed me the phone. Bryan yelled, “What the fuck is going on Ron?” “It’s true Bryan; Randy is dead.” He fired off a round of questions without a break. “What made you stop by Randy’s apartment? How did you get in? Was anything missing? How do you know it was Bruce?” My eyes filled as I said, “I left a message for Randy but he never called me back. When I went by to check on him, his neighbor said he had company Wednesday night and she hadn’t seen him since.” “Did she say what the guy looked like?” he asked. “Yeah, her description sounded exactly like Bruce!” “So what happened next?” he shrieked. “I used my key to go in and that’s when we found him.” Bryan whimpered, “I can’t believe this shit!” “That’s what I keep telling myself.” He settled down as he asked what the police had to say. “That’s the good news; that asshole left a beer bottle, a washcloth they think he used to wipe his dick and there was

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What’s in in it for me? even cum on Randy’s clothes. The police are sure the DNA will lead them to a suspect but I know it was Bruce!” “Damn right it was Bruce!” Bryan snapped. “I kept telling the police that but they wouldn’t listen!” “I don’t care what they say,” Richard yelled, “I know it was Bruce!” “So what are y’all about to do now?” Bryan asked. “Richard is going to work but I don’t think he’s up to it. I had a meeting at a project site but I couldn’t force myself go so I came to the park to clear my head.” “I don’t wanna be alone; can y’all come over?” he asked. “Yeah, we need each other right now,” I sighed. “Okay, I’ll be waiting,” Bryan said then hung up. Richard anxiously asked, “What did he say?” “He wants us to come over to his place.” “Then let’s go!” he shouted heading in the opposite direction of where I was parked. I called out, “Richard, I’m over this way!” He turned to follow me but he was walking so fast that it was all I could do to keep up. Richard was a bundle of nerves by the time we reached 10th Street—I stopped at the curb but he stepped into the oncoming traffic. I grabbed his jacket just as a car swerved to avoid hitting him. The consequences of his recklessness suddenly set in. He thanked me adding, “I don’t know where my head is!” Shaken from the near miss, I said, “I’m not much better.” He was so preoccupied when we reached the car that he tugged at the door handle before I could unlock it. “I'm sorry Ron, I’m just a little fucked up right now.” “I know Richard; that makes two of us!”

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Christopher Beckwith I started the car triggering the radio. We were instantly annoyed by the commercial blaring through the speakers so I turned it off. Staring out the window, he said, “Thanks, I really don’t need the aggravation right now.” I simply responded, “Me either.”

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FortyForty-eight Up in smoke

ryan was sitting out front smoking a cigarette when we pulled up. Once he saw my car, he tossed it to the ground and rushed over to meet us. Richard hugged Bryan as if he hadn’t seen him in years. I joined them in a group hug and suddenly we all were crying. “Do y’all mind if we stay out here?” he asked. “I know it’s cold but I had to get out of my apartment.” I told him I went to the park because I felt the same way. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a fat blunt. “I rolled us some nerve medicine while I was waiting,” he said. “We can go over there and smoke it in the gazebo.” A huge grin covered Richard’s face as he joked, “That’s my sister, always on point!” “Oh, that’s right Ron; you don’t smoke,” Bryan said. I replied, “I could smoke some crack after this drama!” We looked at Bryan in disgust when he said, “Well, I can make a call if you want me to!” Richard said, “You can keep that shit, I’m sure Ron was just kidding!” I didn’t hesitate to make sure they knew I was. Bryan sparked the blunt once we were in the gazebo. A combination of smoke and grief clouded his voice as he said, “I can’t believe this shit is happening!”

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Christopher Beckwith Richard sighed, “My gut told me not to let Randy leave with Bruce. Damn, why didn’t I listen?” “Well, we can’t beat ourselves up about it,” I said. “The question is what are we gonna do about that asshole?” Passing the blunt to Richard, Bryan snapped, “I wish I could get my hands on Bruce; I’d kill that bastard!” “And I’d help!” Richard choked through a hazy cloud as he passed the blunt to me. They laughed when I took my first hit then coughed my head off. Richard joked, “Bryan’s right, you don’t smoke do you?” I didn’t know whether to laugh or cough so I did both. “Take this shit before I cough up a lung!” I wheezed as I passed it to Bryan. Our laughter faded once Richard asked if I thought the police would be able to charge Bruce. “I don’t see why not; all the evidence points to him.” Passing the blunt to Richard, Bryan barked, “I hope they fry his sorry ass!” After a quick hit, Richard huffed, “I wanna be right there when they flip the switch!” “That makes two of us!” I said reaching for the blunt. My phone rang just as I was about to take a hit. I didn’t recognize the number but figured I should answer because it might be news about the case. I took a quick hit then answered, “Hello.” “Hey Ron, it’s Erica,” she chirped in a sweet voice. I smiled and said, “Hey you, what’s going on?” “Not much, I’m at the hospital visiting Aunt Ella.” “Oh really, how’s she doing?” The relief in Erica’s voice was clear as she replied, “She’s

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What’s in in it for me? doing great; she should be able to go home tomorrow.” “Now that is good news!” She happily sang out, “You can say that again!” “So what do I owe this pleasant surprise?” “Eric’s grilling burgers later so I was calling to see if you wanna come by.” There was no denying the effect the blunt was having on my appetite so I said, “I’m in!” I was caught off guard when Erica asked if I was okay so I asked what she meant. “You just sound a little strange,” she said. Unsure if I should tell Erica I was stoned, I decided on a simple, “I’m fine.” “Aunt Ella told me how often you stop by Krispy Kreme so I know you’re familiar with the West End.” Laughing, I admitted, “I do spend a lot of time there.” “We live down the block from the mall so you shouldn’t have a problem finding the house,” Erica said. Once she gave me the address, I asked her to make sure to save a burger for me. “Well, you’d better hurry; you know Eric can eat!” I was quick to say, “I’m already there!” Both sets of eyes were locked on me when I hung up so I explained, “That was a friend inviting me over for lunch.” Bryan snapped, “So what’s his name?” “Her name is Erica!” Taking on the role of a skeptic, he asked, “Oh, so you do fish too?” “I still wouldn’t stand a chance with her; she’s one of the fellas!” I joked. “Okaaay!” they sang out in unison.

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Christopher Beckwith Bryan tried to pass me the blunt but I raised my hand to reject the offer. “What’s wrong, can’t hang with the big girls?” Nudging Bryan, I told him I’d never be able to hang on his level. They laughed realizing I was probably right. When I asked if Richard needed a ride, he said, “Naw, I think I’ll stay here and help Bryan polish off this fattie!” “But don’t you have to go to work?” I asked. “Yeah, but they’re about to get one ol’ call from me!” “Call me as soon as you have the details about Randy’s service,” Bryan said. Once I had his number locked in, I told him I’d call if I heard anything about the case. I was suddenly overwhelmed as I added, “…and the funeral.”

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What’s in in it for me?

FortyForty-nine nine You’ve got a friend

he ride to the West End was smooth because of the light traffic. I don’t smoke often so it was hard to stay alert in my buzzed state. I was just glad I was able to concentrate long enough to get there in one piece. Locating the house wasn’t a problem; Miss Ella’s quaint Victorian stood out from all the other homes on Oglethorpe Avenue. It was ironic that I had driven past the house hundreds of times but had no idea she lived there. The smoke bellowing from the backyard was a sign that lunch was underway. The aroma triggered my hunger as I realized I hadn’t eaten all day; I was looking forward to an old-fashioned burger. As I made my way up the driveway, Erica appeared at the side of the house carrying a bag of trash. After tossing the bag in the garbage can, she gave me a peck on the cheek and said, “Excuse my sticky hands.” I hugged her as I replied, “Don’t sweat it sweetheart!” “Ron, your timing is perfect,” she said. “Eric’s just about to put the burgers on the grill.” I told her I couldn’t believe how good the coals smelled. “Just wait until the burgers start sizzling,” she said as if I needed enticing. Just thinking about them made my stomach growl.

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Christopher Beckwith I followed her around back where Eric was on the deck putting the burgers on the grill. I was seduced by the aroma as soon as the patties hit the flame. “Hey Ron!” he greeted with a wave of his spatula. “What’s up Eric; it’s good to see you man!” Erica asked, “Ron, would you like something to drink?” “I’d love a drink; what do you have?” “Heineken or Merlot; take your pick.” I quickly answered, “A glass of Merlot sounds good.” “Coming right up!” she said ducking into the kitchen. It was hard not to notice Eric in his Kappa tee shirt and a pair of cut offs. His smooth legs begged to be adored and I happily obliged. “So Eric, I hear Miss Ella is coming home tomorrow.” He chuckled, “Yeah, and she can hardly wait!” “I’m glad she’s okay, I was really worried about her.” “That makes two of us,” he said. “I know she’s in good hands here with Erica but I still worry about her.” Eric must have been reading my mind because he suggested we go inside. “I was beginning to think y’all were gonna eat out here,” I said. “I know you live in DC but I’m a southern boy!” His expression instantly implied, ‘Nigga please!’ “Man, I’m just saying; I was about to ask for a blanket!” “Don’t get it twisted Ron!” he fired back. “I may be a lot of things but crazy ain’t one of ‘em!” “Judging from that outfit, I wasn’t so sure.” Eric laughed as he explained that they were planning to eat outside until he realized how cold it was. “It’s August so I was hoping it would warm up!” “Okay man, I’ll let you slide this time.”

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What’s in in it for me? Erica was reaching for the wine when we stepped inside. She asked if I would do the honors and I replied, “Why certainly my dear!” Eric shook his head as he muttered, “Give colored folks a glass of wine and they morph into uppity negroes!” Erica snapped, “That’s Mr. and Ms. Uppity Negro!” My phone rang as I was opening the wine. The call was coming from the 478 area code so I figured I should answer. The faint voice said, “Hey Ron, it’s Michelle.” I went numb as I prepared to hear the news. “So how are things going?” I asked. She sighed, “Okay under the circumstances; we’re at the funeral home finalizing the arrangements.” Reality set in as I asked about the details of the service. “Well Ron, the good news is Mama doesn’t wanna have a wake and a funeral too,” Michelle said. “She decided on a viewing for the family and then the funeral that none of us are looking forward to.” “That’s a good idea,” I said. “It’s best to keep it simple.” “I thought so; she wants to avoid prying questions from people looking to trash Randy’s memory.” I was relieved about the plans and said, “You know a lot of people are just looking for an excuse to spread rumors.” “Folks in Macon live for drama like this,” she sighed. Then I asked if they had set a date for the funeral. “Yeah, the viewing is scheduled for Monday night and the funeral is Tuesday afternoon. Mama doesn’t wanna drag it out any longer then we have to.” “Yeah, it’s a good idea not to prolong it,” I said. “Ron, I’m just ready to get this over with!” I admitted I was torn about the situation. “There’s a part

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Christopher Beckwith of me that’s ready to get it over with too but I’d rather just pretend it didn’t happen.” “I felt that way but there’s no pretending anymore,” she responded in a grim tone. It was selfish to feel the way I did since they were dealing with the situation firsthand. Her hesitation let me know how hard it was on them when I asked if they had been able to see Randy. “No, they’re dressing him now,” she said. “I’m not sure I’m ready to see him.” “I’m sorry Michelle; I know you’re not in the mood for stupid questions.” “That’s okay Ron, I’m sure you just wanna know what’s going on. I’ll call you back once I have the details.” “Thanks Michelle; give your parents my love.” I could feel the twin’s eyes locked on me as I hung up. “What’s this about a funeral?” Erica asked. “I knew we’d have to talk about this sooner or later but I was trying to put it off as long as possible.” Eric sat in silence as Erica asked what was going on. “Well, to make a long story short, my friend Randy was murdered. I found his body last night.” “Oh my God!” Erica gasped. “I’m sorry to hear that.” “That’s why I was glad y’all invited me over for lunch. I needed something to take my mind off of it.” Eric rubbed my shoulder as he said, “I’m glad we could help; just let us know if there’s anything we can do to make things easier.” “Yeah Ron, we’re here for you,” Erica added. “You need some food to take this off of your mind,” Eric said as he got up to check on the burgers.

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What’s in in it for me? The aroma sweeping the deck found its way in when he opened the door. At that point, my stomach was twisted in knots and I was more than ready to eat. “Looks like they’re ready!” he called out. I asked Erica if there was anything I could do to help. “Yeah Ron, grab the potato salad from the refrigerator.” “I hope you’re ready to eat!” Eric said as he brought the sizzling patties in. I quickly replied, “Man, ready ain’t the word!” He wasted no time building a mammoth burger as Erica dished up three helpings of potato salad and baked beans. I was reminded of Sam as I watched him pile on the toppings. I laughed when Erica told me to jump in before the Grizzly devoured everything. I was sure she knew her brother’s eating habits better than I did so I gladly took her advice. As we took our seats, Erica said, “I wanna say a special prayer before we eat.” We bowed our heads as she began, “Dear Lord, I would normally thank you for providing this food and ask you to bless the hands that prepared it but today I feel like I should ask a different blessing. Please bless Ron and Randy’s family. Wrap your arms around them as they deal with their sorrow. We give you all the glory, Amen.” A tear fell from my eye as I mentioned how beautiful the prayer was. Squeezing my hand, Erica said, “I spoke from the heart.”

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Fifty ifty The results are in! ven was at his desk combing through a relentless pile of paperwork. He was working on three other cases but he couldn’t stop thinking about Randy’s murder; he just couldn’t shake the senselessness of it. All he wanted to do was to catch the killer and put everyone’s mind at ease. He was startled when the phone on his desk rang. “Detective Anderson,” he answered. “It’s Kevin in the forensics lab; I got good news buddy!” “Man, I’ve been waiting to hear from you,” Aven said. There was no hiding Kevin’s excitement as he went over the details. “The evidence from the Richards’ crime scene is back. There was an exact match; the name is Bruce Collins.” “Does that include the prints from the kitchen?” “Yeah man, those were a match too!” Aven leaned back and said, “I knew I should follow my gut during the investigation. Something told me I would be able to prove the suspect was looking for a knife if we could find his fingerprints in the kitchen.” “Well, it looks like your hunch paid off. I don’t know if it’s enough to get a conviction but at least you can place him at the scene.” “You’re right, now I have something to work with!”

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What’s in in it for me? “Yeah Aven, I guess you do!” “Kevin, this character has a wrap sheet as long as your arm. Thanks to the DNA and the fingerprints, we should be able to build a strong case against him. You’re the best!” “I could have told you that!” Kevin teased. Laughing along, Aven said, “I knew you were good for something!” Kevin replied, “Just know you owe me man!” “Okay, the beers are on me,” Aven said then hung up. A smile swept his face as he realized he had a solid case and could move on to finding Bruce. Aven decided to call Ron to tell him the good news. He knew it would take more than a hunch to solve this case; it would take facts and now he had them.

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FiftyFifty-one Have I got news for you! unch with Eric and Erica was exactly what I needed. The food was delicious and their hospitality helped my mood. Then I remembered those thighs. Eric was a little reserved but I was sure he was making some brotha in D.C. very happy. He was a sexy piece of butterscotch waiting to be unwrapped. My cell suddenly rang as I exited the freeway. I didn’t recognize the number but I figured it might be important so I answered with a guarded, “Hello.” I was shocked to hear, “Good afternoon Mr. Davis, this is Detective Anderson.” “Oh, hello Detective Anderson,” I said relaxing a little. “We don’t have to be so formal; you can call me Aven.” I chuckled, “Okay Detective Aven, just call me Ron.” When I asked if there were any new developments in the investigation, he said, “Yeah Ron, I have some good news. I was wondering if I could come by so we can talk about it.” I thought it was strange that he wanted to come by so I asked if it was something we could discuss over the phone. “I think we could get more accomplished if we spoke in person,” he said. I wasn’t in the mood for company but I conceded and told him I was on my way home.

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What’s in in it for me? “I’m right around the corner from your apartment based on the address you gave us last night. I’ll meet you there.” I agreed and told him I’d see him soon. As I was about to hang up, he added, “I’ll be waiting!” I wondered why he wanted to talk in person when we could have discussed the case over the phone. I figured I was giving it too much energy and decided to wait to see why he was acting so strange. Sure enough, Aven was waiting in a blacked out Lincoln Navigator when I pulled in. He was on a call and motioned that he’d be done shortly. Aven was walking around to meet me by the time I got out. I was surprised to see him in a hoodie and sweats but I wasn’t disappointed. I made a point to keep my eyes focused on his face to avoid staring at his amazing physique; there’s no describing how good he looked. “So Ron, are you okay?” he asked. “It’s been rough but I’ll be fine.” He was still holding my hand so I casually pulled it away as I said, “I’m glad you’re concerned with Randy’s murder; most cops wouldn’t give a rat’s ass about a case like this.” “I was up most of last night thinking about it,” he said. “I’m gonna find the killer and close this case!” I smiled as I replied, “That says a lot Aven; I guess you are one of the good guys.” I laughed when he joked, “That’s why I became a cop, to protect and serve!” “Randy was my best friend; I was worried he would be treated like just another dead sissy.” “That’s funny; one of the officers at my precinct referred to him as, ‘…just another dead sissy.’ It really pissed me off so I

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Christopher Beckwith asked how he would feel if Randy was his brother.” “So what did he have to say after that?” Aven cocked his head as he replied, “That jackass didn’t say anything; I think he knew better!” “Well Aven, I guess you’re not the average cop, huh?” Flattered, he said, “I’ll take that as a compliment.” I invited him in to fill me in on the details. Once we were inside, I said, “I have apple juice, Kool Aid and some good cold water. You want something to drink?” “Maybe later, first I wanna tell you the good news.” I offered Aven a seat then headed to the kitchen to pour myself some apple juice. I felt his eyes on me which was kind of a turn on but I didn’t think much of it. I called out, “So did you come up with any leads?” “Well Ron, the good news is we have a suspect. We ran a DNA profile on the evidence and you were right, the name is Bruce Collins.” “I knew it was Bruce!” I shouted. I poured my juice then joined Aven in the living room. “There’s more Ron, we found his fingerprints on several drawers in the kitchen; that’s enough to establish that he was looking for a knife.” I was so excited that I could have kissed Aven. I had to control myself so instead I shouted, “Hallelujah!” “That’s why I wanted to give you the news in person; I just had to see the look on your face.” My heart was racing—I knew the evidence would point to Bruce and sure enough, it did. “Please tell me that’s enough to arrest that asshole!” “Yeah, but the problem now is finding him. I called the number in his file but it was disconnected. My commanding

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What’s in in it for me? officer is drafting a warrant so we can go by and check on the address in his records.” “That’s what I’m talking about!” I shouted. Aven admitted he wasn’t getting his hopes up. “I’m sure the address will turn out to be another dead end Ron; these characters don’t stay put very long.” “Tell me about it, street hustlers live from pillar to post!” “You’ll probably see him again,” Aven said. “I’m sure he thinks he’s gotten away with it and won’t hesitate to get back on the prowl.” “You think he’s that bold?” “Or that stupid!” he snapped. “Come on Aven, he can’t be that stupid!” “Let’s face it Ron, he’s already left evidence at the crime scene so we know he’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer.” There was an instant change in his demeanor as he said, “I’m sorry Ron; I didn’t mean that—I wasn’t thinking.” I wasn’t offended by his blunder; I was so glad about the news that it didn’t matter. “I’m just glad I have some ammunition for the next time I see him!” I said. Aven stressed, “Ron, I want you to promise to call me if you see Bruce; don’t even think about confronting him!” “Okay, but you’d better get there fast. I can’t say what I’ll do if I see that asshole!” “Hold on Ron, you leave the police work to me!” “I’ll try but I wanna see that bastard get what’s coming to him!” Aven laughed as he stressed, “Just make sure you give it a good try.” Laughing along, I replied, “Okay Aven.”

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Christopher Beckwith He rubbed his hands together as he said, “I’ll have some water now that we’ve gotten that out of the way.” “I guess you deserve a cold drink after the good news; come in the kitchen and I’ll get it for you.” Aven was on my heels every step of the way. I expected him to stop at the breakfast bar but he followed me over to the counter. “Do you want ice?” I asked reaching for a glass. There was a sultry twist to his voice as he responded, “I thought it was already good and cold!” I playfully shot back, “Ice or not?” “Yeah Ron, I’ll have some ice,” he chuckled. Aven leaned against the counter as I filled the glass. Out of the blue, he asked how long I’d lived in my apartment. Wondering why he was so full of small talk, I answered, “About four years I guess.” He walked up behind me and reached around to get the glass. My pulse quickened when his knot located the crack of my ass. I was instantly turned on as he drank the water with me trapped against the counter; the only thing keeping him from invading me was the fabric between us. Aven’s muscle flexed against my cheeks as I slid away. I watched in silence as he emptied the glass before a quenched sigh escaped his lips. He put the glass on the counter then reached out for a handshake. “I’d better go Ron; I’m sure you have plenty to do before you leave for the funeral.” I thanked Aven as I returned the handshake that lasted longer than a typical one would. The awkward moment was complicated by his thumb caressing the back of my hand. When I asked if there was anything else, he seductively

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What’s in in it for me? said, “I don’t know how to ask you this so I’ll just say it. Are you seeing anyone?” Before I could reply, he glanced down at his groin then apologized for his obvious excitement. I noticed the bulge stretching his sweats then felt my trapped wood straining in my jeans. I laughed thinking I should have kissed him when he gave me the news. I had to admit Aven was attractive but I thought our connection was strictly professional. With an awkward grin, he uttered, “Excuse me Ron.” “Don’t sweat it,” I said. “I’m just a little surprised; I had no idea you were into in guys.” Aven continued caressing my hand while defending his actions. “Ron, I did have an encounter with a guy in college but I convinced myself that I was just horny and it was a one time deal.” Any other time, I would have jumped at the chance to get with him but I couldn’t handle any more drama with the chaos of Randy’s murder. He rubbed the back of my hand against his bone as we drifted closer. I had to say something so I told him it seemed like he had issues dealing with his sexuality then felt stupid for saying so. The voice belonging to my sex drive whispered, ‘Shut up and have this sexy muthafucka! You know we’ve always fantasized about a surprise hook-up with a cop!’ “Ron, I can’t say I haven’t thought about kicking it with a dude; I’ve just never met a guy that I felt a connection with. For some reason, I feel like it could be you.” All of a sudden, the voice was shouting, ‘See, he likes you. Stop playing around and fuck him!’ At that point, it was my turn to keep it real. I told Aven

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Christopher Beckwith that I had just gotten back from Houston and I met someone who turned out to be really special. “Things got serious and it looks like it might work out. It’s still early but I wanna give it a chance.” A devilish grin covered his face as he asked, “Ron, how would you feel about having a friend here to keep you warm when you can’t make it to Houston?” ‘Bingo bitch! Bingo!’ the nagging voice screamed. Struggling to win the mental battle, I said, “I’m tempted but I don’t think it’s a good idea. Sooner or later, somebody’s gonna have a problem with it.” “That says a lot Ron; if you were willing to cheat on him, you’d probably cheat on me too. I respect your honesty.” Instead of giving in, I asked if we could be friends. He smiled and said, “Okay, I can handle that.” The annoying voice grumbled, ‘I don’t believe this shit!’ Aven stopped at the breakfast bar and asked, “Would a hug between friends be okay before I leave?” “Without a doubt!” I replied. Wrapping his arms around me, he said, “See ya’ later.” What began as a hug soon became a kiss. I tried to resist but I welcomed his tongue. I wrapped my arms around his neck as my groin searched for his. He kissed me deeper as he thrust his pelvis at me then ended the kiss with a peck. “That’s something to hold onto in case things don’t work out with Mr. Houston.” My eyes were drawn to the lump stretching his sweats; that’s when I told him he had to go. “You’re right, if I stay any longer I’ll pull this nightstick out and you know what will happen then,” he said. “Yeah, I know; that’s why you need to leave.”

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What’s in in it for me? My legs trembled as I walked Aven to the door. “Bye sexy, I’ll call you soon,” he said before planting a soft kiss on my lips. I opened the door and watched a perfect man step out of my apartment and walk down the stairs. Once I closed the door, my sex drive griped, ‘You never let me have any fun. I’m going back to sleep, dumb bitch!’

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FiftyFifty-two two That was a close one!

ven was gone and I needed a real drink. He left me with ragged nerves and a raging erection but my soft spot for Sam was still in tact. He was attractive but there was no way I was gonna jeopardize the good thing I had with Sam for a hook up. I considered having a glass of wine then realized what I needed was something with a little more kick. I remembered the fifth of Jack Daniels in the pantry so I headed to the kitchen to pour a shot over my melting ice. I was startled by the vibrating phone in my pocket; Lord knows I’d had enough excitement for one day. I was relieved to see Erica’s name on the display so I quickly answered. “Hey Ron, I was just calling to see how you’re doing.” “I’m fine; I just poured myself a much needed cocktail.” “I’m sure you could use it!” she teased. Thinking back to Aven’s visit, I chuckled, “You can say that again!” Erica mentioned that she and Eric were talking about the funeral and didn’t think I should go through it alone. “Thanks Erica, having lunch with you guys helped.” “You’re welcome Ron but I had something else in mind. I’d be happy to help you drive if you want some company.” I was floored by the offer. I’d only known her for a day

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What’s in in it for me? and she was willing to make such a big sacrifice to help me through my grief. “Erica, you don’t have to do that; I’ll be fine.” “I know I don’t have to do it but I’m not taking no for an answer!” she snapped. It didn’t take much thought; I enjoyed hanging out with Erica and I could definitely use the company. “I just hope you’re up to it!” I said. “Ron, I’m looking forward to it,” she chuckled. “I’m sure some of the outfits will be tragic so you’ll need someone to laugh with; it’s the least I can do.” She was dead on about the parade of country couture. I thought about Miss Ella and asked if it was okay for her to leave town so soon after her release from the hospital. “Yeah, it’ll give Eric a chance to spend time with her.” “Then it’s a date!” I teased. Laughing, she shot back, “Just don’t tell any of the girls, I have a reputation to uphold!” “Erica, your secret is safe with me. I’ll call you as soon as I have the details.” “Okay sweetie, I’ll be listening for you call.” I decided to call Miss Hattie to see if the arrangements had been finalized. After a few rings, I heard her sweet voice. “Hey Miss Hattie; how are you?” “I’m doing pretty good Ron. You must be a mind reader; your mother’s on the other line.” “Oh, do you want me to call you back?” “No, we’re almost finished,” she said. “Hold on while I say goodbye.” I was happy that she sounded so upbeat. I thought she wouldn’t be able to handle Randy’s death but she seemed to

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Christopher Beckwith be holding up. In no time, Miss Hattie was back on the line. “Ron, I’ve been out of sorts all day but your mom’s call picked up my spirits.” “That’s Ma,” I said. “She’s always had a way of making people feel better.” Miss Hattie responded, “Well, it worked for me!” I was reluctant to ask about the service because I didn’t want to ruin her mood. Miss Hattie beat me to the punch and said she was just about to call me. “There’s a family viewing Monday evening. That should last about an hour or so and then the funeral is Tuesday afternoon.” When the phone went silent, I asked if she was okay. There was a hint of sadness in her voice as she said, “I just can’t believe I’m talking about my son’s funeral.” Trying to comfort her, I said, “Miss Hattie, I know this is hard for you.” “Ron, it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to deal with.” I was touched by her honesty in the midst of sorrow. Forcing a lighter tone, she asked when I was coming. “I’m leaving Monday after work,” I said. “I just need to check on a project before I leave.” “So you’ll be here in time for the viewing, right?” “Yes, all I have to do now is make hotel reservations.” “What makes you think you’re staying at a hotel?” Miss Hattie huffed. “You’re staying right here with us!” “I’d love to but I’m bringing someone with me.” She didn’t hesitate to ask, “Who is this mystery man?” Tickled by her assumption, I explained, “My friend Erica offered to help me drive.”

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What’s in in it for me? “That was nice; I can’t wait to meet her.” I assured her that she would love Erica. “I’m sure I will,” she said. “I guess I’ll see you Monday.” “I guess so,” I sighed. “Give everyone my love.” I decided to call Erica with the details. I was grooving to her Ledisi ringtone but she answered before I could get into the song. “That was quick!” she said. “Yeah, I called Randy’s mother to get the info about the service. She’s planning a family viewing for Monday evening and then the funeral is Tuesday afternoon.” Erica said, “Good, now I can go to work Monday; that’ll make it easier to take Tuesday off.” “That’s what I was thinking. I just need to book a room and we’re set.” “I’ll let Eric know everything’s under control,” she said. “Okay babe, I’ll talk to you later.” I realized Erica was a Godsend; she’s one in a million. Now back to my cocktail!

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FiftyFifty-three I’ll be there too!

rica was telling Eric about the details of the funeral when her phone rang. Noticing Cynthia’s name on the display, she smiled thinking how happy she was about reconnecting with her good friend. She quickly answered, “Hey Cynthia.” “Hey girl, I was just calling to check on your aunt.” Erica happily replied, “She’s doing pretty good!” “I’m glad to hear that,” Cynthia said. “I was planning to stop by the hospital but time just got away from me.” There was a smile in Erica’s voice as she replied, “She’ll be home tomorrow so you’ll have plenty of time to visit.” “That is good news!” Cynthia said. “I can swing by after church but I can’t stay long, I need to get ready for a trip.” “And where are you jetting off to?” Erica asked. Cynthia’s voice softened as she told Erica she was going out of town for a funeral. “That’s funny; Ron’s friend was murdered so I offered to help him drive to Macon.” The irony grew as Cynthia asked if his name was Randy. “Yeah girl, I can’t believe it’s the same guy!” “I knew we were talking about the same guy when you mentioned Macon!” Cynthia said. “So how did you know Randy?”

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What’s in in it for me? “We worked together at Glacier Mortgage. Randy was a cut up; he kept me laughing!” Erica mentioned how sad it was that he was murdered. “Girl, don’t I know it!” Cynthia sighed. “It doesn’t make sense,” Erica said. “There are some sick folks out here!” “So when are you and Ron leaving?” “We’re leaving Monday afternoon; what about you?” “Tuesday morning,” Cynthia said. “I’m going with two of my girlfriends from Glacier Mortgage. Girl, I can’t believe you’re going too!” “Well, I didn’t think Ron should go through it alone so I offered to help him drive.” “It’ll be good to see you Erica; I just wish it were under better circumstances.” Her response was a sober, “Well, it is what it is!” “I need to get my butt in gear,” Cynthia said. “Tell Eric I said hello.” “Okay, I’ll see you later.” After the call, Eric asked, “So Cynthia knew Randy too?” “She used to work with him; can you believe it?” “Damn, it’s a small world!” Eric sighed. Erica added, “And the way people are dying, it’s getting smaller by the minute!”

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FiftyFifty-four Welcome home sweetie

he look of relief on Miss Ella’s face proved she was glad to be out of the hospital. She’d only been there a few days but it felt like she would never get released. Now that she was free, Miss Ella could hardly wait to enjoy the comforts of home. “Thank you Jesus,” she said clawing at the door handle. Eric was tickled by his anxious aunt and told her to hold on so he could help her out of the car. “Yeah, we don’t want you over doing it!” Erica added. Miss Ella winced as a sudden jolt of pain persuaded her to wait. “My leg hurts like the dickens!” she moaned. Erica couldn’t resist teasing, “I guess you realize you’re not Wonder Woman after all!” Once they were inside, Miss Ella asked to go to her bedroom because the worst part of the hospital stay was, “…that lumpy ass bed!” Erica asked if she wanted to take something for the pain. “No sweetie, I’m sure I’ll feel better after I lay down.” Erica helped her aunt to the bed and asked if she wanted to watch television. “No,” Miss Ella said. “Lord knows I watched more than my share while I was in the hospital.” “Good, that’ll give us some time to talk.”

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What’s in in it for me? Caught off guard when Erica told her she was going out of town, Miss Ella asked, “Where are you going?” “Ron’s friend was murdered. I didn’t think he should go to the funeral alone so I offered to help him drive.” “Oh my God!” Miss Ella moaned. “What happened?” “Ron said he hadn’t heard from Randy so he went by to check on him and that’s when he found the body.” “You mean to tell me Ronnie found the body!” “Yes Aunt Ella, that’s the worse part of it.” Again she moaned, “Oh my God!” Erica mentioned that Cynthia used to work with Randy. “Is she going to the funeral?” Miss Ella asked. “Yes, she’s going with a couple of her girlfriends.” “I should call to see how Ronnie’s doing,” Miss Ella said. “Do you have his number? Erica told her aunt she had it in her cell phone and asked Eric if he would get her purse from the coffee table. Miss Ella told Erica that it was sweet of her to offer to go to the funeral adding, “It’s a good thing Eric is here.” “Yeah Aunt Ella, that’s the only reason I decided to go.” “Well, I guess God has a plan for everything.” When Eric returned with the purse, Erica pulled out her cell to locate Ron’s number. After the first ring, she handed it to her aunt.

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FiftyFifty-five Great day in the morning woke up revitalized realizing it was only by God’s grace that I was able to get some rest after struggling to cope with Randy’s murder. Feeling blessed, I thanked God for helping me to deal with it. I figured I’d call Sam to say good morning. I wasn’t sure if he slept in on Sundays but I knew he wouldn’t mind. I reached for my cell but it started ringing before I could pick it up. Thinking he had beaten me to the punch, I noticed Erica was calling. I answered, “Hey Erica, what’s up?” Instead of Erica, I heard, “Hey Ronnie, it’s Miss Ella.” Surprised, I said, “Good morning; I hope you’re calling to let me know you’re home.” “Yes, they finally set this ol’ girl free.” “It’s so good to hear your voice,” I said. “Thank you Ronnie but that’s not why I’m calling. Erica told me about your friend so I wanted to tell you how sorry I am; it’s just terrible!” “That means a lot Miss Ella. So how are you doing?” With a slight grunt, she said, “I’m in a little pain but I’ll be fine. I’m just glad to be home.” “So did Erica tell you she’s going with me to Macon?” “Yes, she told me. I’m sure you could use the company.”

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What’s in in it for me? “I appreciate Erica’s offer Miss Ella but I hate taking her away when you’re just getting home.” “Eric’s here so I’ll be fine. Just make sure Erica behaves; I don’t want those people in Macon thinking she ain’t got no home training!” I was quick to respond, “I’ll let you know if she get’s out of hand so you can whip her tail.” “And you know I will!” she snapped. My laughter was punctuated by a hiccup which caused her to laugh. “It’s so good to hear you laugh Miss Ella.” “Ronnie, I’m so glad to be home I’d laugh at just about anything. I’m just happy to hear you laughing.” “Yeah, it feels good to laugh,” I admitted. “This has hit me really hard Miss Ella; Randy was my closest friend.” She comforted me even further saying, “You’re probably wondering why God allowed this to happen. Just remember Proverbs teaches us to, ‘Trust in the Lord with thine own heart and lean not unto thine own understanding.’ “I know Miss Ella but it still hurts. Randy didn’t deserve to die, not like this.” “Of course he didn’t but God can turn a tragedy around for the greater good. There’s a reason for everything Ronnie, God will never put more on you than you can bear; that’s his promise to us sweetie!” Her words were comforting; she was just getting home from the hospital and still found it in her heart to call me. “I’m sure you need to get some rest,” I said. “I’ll talk to you later.” “You’re right Ronnie; it’s almost time for me to take one of these pain pills but I need to eat something first.”

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Christopher Beckwith “Oh, did Erica cook breakfast?” Miss Ella huffed, “Child please, Eric is cooking breakfast for me!” Laughing at her reference to Erica’s inept cooking skills, I said, “I guess I should let you go; maybe I’ll come over later if you’re up to it.” “Ronnie, I’m always up for your company,” she replied. “Good, then I’ll see you later.” I was about to hang up when she said Erica wanted to talk to me. Once Erica was on the phone, she asked, “So, were you surprised to hear from Aunt Ella?” “Yeah, I thought it was you calling.” “We figured you’d get a kick out of the call.” I told her she was right then asked, “So I guess Miss Ella is glad to be home, huh?” “Ron, you wouldn’t believe how happy Aunt Ella is. She was hungry when we got here so Eric is cooking breakfast.” “I know the feeling; I was about to cook too.” “You wanna join us?” she asked. “I know it’s early but there’s plenty of food and Aunt Ella would love to see you.” The question didn’t take much thought; I told her I just needed to take a shower and I’d be on my way. “Okay sweetie, I’ll see you in a little bit,” she said. Before hanging up, I asked Erica if I needed me to bring anything. “You can stop by Krispy Kreme to get donuts; Aunt Ella will get a kick out of that.” “Cool, the donuts are in the bag!” “Don’t you mean ‘in the box’?” she asked. “I guess I do Miss Grammatically Correct!”

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What’s in in it for me? Sam crossed my mind after the call so I called him. I smiled when he answered, “Good morning sexy.” “Good morning Mister; how are you?” “I’m feeling pretty good; I was just thinking about you.” “Is that so?” I teased. “Yeah, I was wondering if you were feeling any better.” “I was feeling a little down yesterday then Erica invited me over for lunch,” I said. “That really helped my mood.” “I guess so since I didn’t hear from you last night!” “I’m sorry Sam; I had a shot of Jack Daniel’s that turned into two and then three. Next thing I knew, I was out!” “Okay, that’s your story and you’re sticking to it, huh?” I hoped he was kidding but I wasn’t sure. I’m not one to play the guilt game so I reminded him that telephones work both ways. “Guilty as charged,” he replied. “I fell asleep too. I woke up in the middle of the night and thought about calling you but I figured it was too late.” “So I guess we’re even,” I teased. With a chuckle, he said. “Yeah, I guess so!” Changing the subject, I told Sam about the surprise call from Miss Ella. “I’m sure she’s glad to be home,” he said. “That’s why I thought she was calling but she wanted to let me know she was sorry to hear about Randy.” “Oh, did she know him?” “No, Erica told her about Randy’s murder so she called to see how I was doing.” “It was nice of her to call and check on you,” he said. “Yeah, I thought so too. So what are you doing today?” “I’m going to church since I didn’t go last Sunday. You

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Christopher Beckwith should go with me the next time you come to Houston.” “Cool with me, I love good preaching.” There was no hiding Sam’s pride as he raved about his Pastor. “You’ll love him; he ministers without being preachy. Our congregation loves him.” “I’m looking forward to it.” I noticed the time and said, “I need to get in the shower so I can get out of here.” “And where are you running off to?” “Eric is cooking breakfast so Erica invited me over. She thought it would be a nice surprise for Miss Ella.” “You’ll never have to cook again if you keep going over there to eat,” he joked. I quickly asked, “Who said I cook?” “Well, you’d better start if you wanna keep me!” I thought back to the trip and realized he was right.

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FiftyFifty-six The most important meal of the day

was looking forward to breakfast. I enjoyed hanging out with the twins and it was funny that food was involved whenever we were together. I was hoping to catch the chef in his pajamas but only time would tell. I headed to Miss Ella’s house after breezing through the drive-thru at Krispy Kreme. If the burgers were an indication of what breakfast would be like, I was more than ready. I was greeted by Erica when I rang the doorbell. She was wearing a colorful dashiki accentuated by her huge smile. She sang out, “Good morning Ron.” “Good morning African Queen!” With a hearty laugh, Erica said, “Not only must a queen look majestic; she has to be comfortable too!” I laughed along as she gave me a hug. “Come on in Ron; I hope you’re ready to eat.” I caught a whiff of the amazing aroma floating through the open door and said, “Baby, you already know!” I followed Erica into the kitchen to greet Miss Ella. She cried out, “Oh my Lord!” Walking over to give her a hug, I said, “Good morning.” Miss Ella noticed my gift and chuckled, “I never thought I’d be so happy to see a box of Krispy Kreme donuts.” “We thought you’d get a kick out of them,” Erica said.

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Christopher Beckwith “You were right; I really feel like I’m home now!” Erica flipped the box open and offered her aunt a donut. Taking one, Miss Ella sighed, “I don’t like people fussing over me but I could get used to all this attention.” I rubbed her arm as I assured her that a special woman deserved special treatment. I was disappointed to see Eric at the stove in a tee shirt and sweats—so much for catching the chef in his pajamas. Realizing they could have been his pajamas, I made a mental note to be more specific about my wishes in the future. Eric glanced over his shoulder and said, “Your timing is perfect Ron, I’m just about done with the eggs.” Finding it hard to hold back my smile, I eagerly replied, “That’s what I’m talking about; a brotha is ready to eat!” He told me he was drinking orange juice and Merlot. “I know it’s a strange combination but it’s good. You wanna try one?” It sounded delicious so I told him to bring it on. He asked Erica if she would make it for me and she said, “I’m already on it.” The scrambled eggs looked good but the potatoes and biscuits had me. The potatoes were sautéed with onions and a colorful blend of red, yellow and green peppers and the biscuits were not from a can. “Eric, did you make the biscuits from scratch?” I asked. Miss Ella said, “That’s the only way you’ll get ‘em here!” Eric explained that he decided to surprise Erica and Miss Ella with breakfast one year during Christmas break. “Aunt Ella was beaming about how good everything smelled until I took the biscuits out of the oven. She trashed the whole batch then stood over my shoulder giving me step by step instruc-

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What’s in in it for me? tions on how to make scratch biscuits.” I was glad I didn’t have my drink because I would have sprayed the table trying to control my laughter. “I guess you learned your lesson, huh?” “Ron, after that everyone called me ‘Pillsbury Dough Boy’ on campus.” Handing me the drink, Erica said, “I love it when Eric’s home; he can shut it down in the kitchen!” After hearing about the biscuits, the platter stacked with country ham that Eric brought to the table was no surprise. When he asked Miss Ella to bless the food, she said, “I’d be happy to.” We bowed our heads as she began, “Dear Lord, first let me say how thankful I am for my niece and nephew; I don’t know what I’d ever do without them. Thank you so much for bringing Ronnie into my life; I love him like he was mine. In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy ghost, Amen!” I tried the potatoes and almost lost my mind. They had to be the best potatoes I’d ever had and the biscuits were as light and fluffy as the donuts. I moaned, “This food is as good as lunch yesterday.” Eric admitted he had a great teacher so he couldn’t take all the credit. Miss Ella acknowledged the compliment with a smile. Erica said, “Eric’s got skills in the kitchen, I had the same teacher and I can’t touch him.” “You can say that again!” Miss Ella joked. “I appreciate Erica but there’s nothing like having Eric here to cook for me. He got my know-how when it comes to cooking!” I asked when she would be back at work because Krispy Kreme just wasn’t the same without her.

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Christopher Beckwith “I do miss my co-workers Ronnie but I’m in no hurry to go back to work. They’re just gonna have to manage without me for a while.” “She’s not going back one minute before the doctor says it’s okay,” Erica added. “She doesn’t need the money; it’s just something to keep her preoccupied.” “Ronnie, it’s not the money; Lord knows they don’t pay me nothing! I enjoy talking to the customers, especially you.” Eric said, “You must be special Ron; Aunt Ella rarely has people in the house and never this early in the morning.” Miss Ella stressed, “You gotta be careful who you let in your house these days!” I wished Randy had been there to hear that. When the doorbell rang, Miss Ella griped, “Who in the world is that?” Erica told her aunt it was probably her other surprise. After hearing her shush the mystery guests, she returned to the kitchen followed by Cynthia and Teddy. Miss Ella said, “Lord, y’all gon’ give me a heart attack!” “Hey Miss Ella,” Teddy sang out rushing over for a hug. “How’s my little man?” she asked. Nodding with each word, he declared, “I’m, just, fine!” Cynthia walked over to hug Miss Ella as she explained, “I told Erica I was coming by to see you after church.” “Daddy didn’t go to church today!” Teddy advised. Miss Ella chuckled, “Well, I’m glad you went to church,” He proudly replied, “I always go to church!” “It looks like y’all had a good breakfast,” Cynthia said. “I guess we should have gotten here earlier.” I told her the food was incredible. “I’m sure it was,” she said. “I hate we missed it!”

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What’s in in it for me? Teddy saw the box on the counter and said, “Mommy, I see donuts over there!” “Would you like one?” Erica asked. The excitement was killing Teddy as he waited for his mother’s approval. “Okay, you can have one,” she said. As Teddy rushed over to the counter, Cynthia reminded him that he needed to wash his hands. “But my hands didn’t get dirty at church!” Trying not to laugh, she said, “Wash them anyway.” His response was a soft, “Okay mommy.” Erica told Teddy she would take him to the bathroom.” As they walked out of the kitchen, he looked back and said, “I’ll be right back!” Miss Ella asked Eric to get Cynthia a chair. “You can sit here,” he said getting up to clear the plates. “That’s okay Eric, we’re not gonna stay long.” “And where are you rushing off to?” Miss Ella asked. “Ted wants a steak so we’re meeting him at Longhorn.” Miss Ella said, “Child, he can wait; visit for a spell!” “Yes ma’am!” Cynthia responded. “I’ve been experimenting on Ron with my concoction of orange juice and Merlot,” Eric said. “Want one?” “Sounds good,” Cynthia replied. “I’d love one!” Teddy came in with his hands raised for inspection. “See Mommy, my hands are real clean now!” “Good, you can have a donut but only one okay?” “Okay!” he squeaked heading for the box. Cynthia added, “You need a napkin Teddy.” Erica followed him to the counter and said, “I’ll get it.” I was surprised when Cynthia mentioned that Erica told

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Christopher Beckwith her I was friends with Randy. “I just can’t believe he’s gone,” she sighed. Slightly confused, I asked, “Did you know Randy?” “Yeah, I worked with him a couple of years ago; he was a clown!” Eric handed Cynthia the drink as he said, “Erica told me you’re going to the funeral too.” “Yeah, I’m driving down with a couple of the girls from the mortgage company,” she said. “We wouldn’t miss it for the world!” Erica said, “I’m sorry I never got to meet him; he sounds like a really sweet person.” Cynthia chuckled, “Child, he was a mess!” My eyes filled as I added, “You can say that again!” Then Cynthia asked how long I had known Randy. “About eight years but it seems like forever!” Then as if on cue, the waiting tear finally fell. “Ron, I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to upset you.” “That’s okay Cynthia; I miss him but I can’t do anything about it now. It’s just good to know that people loved Randy as much as I did.” Erica said, “Go ahead and cry Ron, I know this is hard.” “I’ve cried so much, it’s hard to believe I have tears left.” Eric rubbed my shoulder joking, “You’re gonna have all of us crying and we didn’t even know Randy.” All I could say was, “You don’t know what you missed!” Cynthia agreed, “That’s the truth; Randy could lift your spirits no matter what you were going through.” She was right; Randy would never let you feel down for long. He’d always say something to make you feel better. “I’m glad y’all invited me over,” I said. “It really means

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What’s in in it for me? a lot to be around friends at a time like this.” Rubbing my hand, Miss Ella responded, “You shouldn’t be alone Ronnie; we’re here for you.” “You don’t know how good that makes me feel,” I said. “Being here is like being with family.” “Ron, you are like family,” Erica said. Chewing, Teddy asked, “Can I be in the family too?” “Yeah, you can be my little brother,” Eric said. “Hear that Mommy?” Teddy squeaked, “You and daddy can stop practicing, I have a brother now!” Miss Ella nearly choked once she realized what he was talking about. Cynthia said, “He’s been asking for a little brother for a while now.” “Sounds like somebody needs to get busy!” Erica teased. “Girl, don’t encourage him; he walked in on us practicing the other night!” I noticed the time and said, “Miss Ella, I hate to eat and run but I’ve got a lot to do before we leave tomorrow.” “We’d better go too,” Cynthia added. Teddy whined, “Aw mommy, do we have to go?” “Yes, your dad is waiting; now give Miss Ella a hug.” He walked over to hug Miss Ella dragging his feet along the way. Shaking her head, Cynthia said, “He just wants to stay because you keep giving him treats.” “Well, let me know the next time you plan to come over and I’ll bake a cake.” Teddy asked, “Mommy, can we come over tomorrow?” Realizing she had to say something, Miss Ella suggested, “Teddy, why don’t I give your mommy a call the next time I

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Christopher Beckwith get ready to bake a cake, okay?” He said, “I hope you get ready to bake one tomorrow!”

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FiftyFifty-seven All this for me?

was blessed with green lights all the way to the freeway which allowed me to make it to work early. I was thankful when I pulled into the parking deck and saw a space up front; it seemed like everything was working in my favor. Before I got out, I prayed for strength to make it through the day. I began, “Dear Lord, please be with me today. Help me keep a positive attitude so I can breeze through my work and grant me peace and understanding as I submit to your will. These and all blessings I ask, Amen.” After the prayer, I headed inside to get on with my day. Once I waved to the security guards, I turned the corner and saw one of the maintenance men waiting for an elevator. Good-spirited as usual, he said, “Good morning Ron.” I responded with a dry, “Good morning John.” Caught off guard by my short response, he asked, “Are you okay; you seem a little down.” Forcing a smile, I told him my best friend was murdered and I was dreading going to the funeral. “I’m sorry to hear that; keep your head up man,” he said as the elevator arrived. I hit the button for the seventh floor as I explained that I was having a hard time dealing with it. “Well Ron, just be glad it wasn’t you,” he said. “Any day

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Christopher Beckwith above ground is a good day!” His words brought a smile to my face as I thought of my Pastor in Winston-Salem. He used the same axiom during a sermon about recognizing blessings in times of trouble. As bad as I felt, I still had to realize I was blessed. Stepping out of the elevator, I thanked him then headed to my office. Of course, Devon was on the phone when I walked in. “Good morning Devon,” I said without stopping. I wasn’t in the mood for small talk and a conversation with her was usually just that. I was surprised to find a yellow envelope wedged between the keys of my keyboard. I just sat there staring at the envelope wanting to open it but unable to. My colleagues gathered around as I opened the card. It was hard to hold back my tears as I read:

I smiled as several bills rained down on my feet. I was surprised that the card had been stuffed with singles, fives and even a few tens. I picked up the money then noticed Mr. Pendleton at my cubicle.

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What’s in in it for me? He asked, “Are you okay Ron?” My reaction went from amazement to appreciation that my boss was asking about my wellbeing. I responded, “Yeah Mr. Pendleton, I’m holding up.” He put his hand on my shoulder as he said, “You know you didn’t have to come to work today; I know you’re going through a rough time.” Mr. Pendleton’s words warmed my heart; it meant a lot that he was so supportive. “I wanted to check on the progress of the Temple Trace project before I left,” I said. “You’ve got a great team working with you; they won’t have a problem handling things while you’re gone.” “You’re right Mr. Pendleton, they’ll be fine. I’m lucky to have such a strong team.” “It wasn’t luck, I wanted my best people on this project; that’s why I chose you as team lead. Don’t worry Ron, they’ll be fine.” I was touched by everyone’s generosity. I really wanted them to know how much their kindness meant so I said, “I appreciate the card, especially the money. Please pray for my friend’s family; this has really been hard on them.” Mr. Pendleton said, “Just let me know if there’s anything I can do to make things easier.” I quickly replied, “A raise would be nice!” “Sure Ron, as a matter of fact just take my job!” “Well, the thought has crossed my mind,” I joked. I expected Mr. Pendleton to laugh but when he didn’t, I assured him he had nothing to worry about. I felt my phone vibrating as he headed back to his office. I answered to Richard’s upbeat tone which boosted my good

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Christopher Beckwith mood even more. He sang out, “Hey Ron, how ya’ doing?” “I’m okay, just tying up a few loose ends before I leave.” “Same here,” he said. “I’ve got a million things to do.” “So are you and Bryan going to the funeral?” “Yeah, we’re leaving first thing in the morning,” I was a little surprised and asked, “So you’re driving?” “Child, I couldn’t believe it when my sister said I could borrow her car.” “Good, I’m sure Randy’s mom is gonna love y’all; I just wish you were meeting her under better circumstances. “Yeah, me too,” he sighed. A short beep caused my face to light up once I realized Sam was on the other line. I told Richard I’d talk to him later then switched over. I greeted Sam with a warm, “Good morning Mister.” His silky voice responded, “Hey sexy.” “Hey back atcha,” I teased. “How ya’ feeling?” “I’m good; just checking to see how you’re feeling?” “Better, but I’m still not looking forward to the trip.” “Just remember I’ll be thinking of you the whole time.” “I wish I could say that but I’ll be so preoccupied that I won’t have time to think about anything but the funeral.” “Now is that the thanks I get?” he snapped. “Pretty much!” I teased. I couldn’t help laughing as I assured him he was always on my mind. His voice took on a sultry twist as he said, “Now that’s more like it!” Peeking into my cubicle, Rita told me that Mr. Pendleton wanted to see us in the conference room to go over some of the details of the Temple Trace project before I left.

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What’s in in it for me? I reluctantly said, “Okay, I’ll be right there.” “Okay,” she said heading for the conference room. “Damn!” “What’s the problem?” Sam asked. “My co-worker just told me I’m needed in a meeting.” “But weren’t you about to leave?” “No, but I wasn’t planning to stay long. Maybe it’ll be a short meeting.” “Don’t forget you’ve got to get on the road!” Sam said. “Yeah, but it’s only an hour’s drive to Macon. I’ll excuse myself if the meeting drags on too long.” “Damn right!” he said. “Don’t let me come up there and whip your boss’ ass!” I was quick to say, “Please don’t do that, I need this job!” With a slight laugh, he said, “Yeah, I guess you do.” As our laughter faded, I told him I really need to go. “I’ll call you before I leave for Macon.” “Okay baby, I’ll be waiting for your call,” he said. I hung up then headed to the conference room. When I walked in, they shouted, “We love you Ron!” I couldn’t believe the impromptu surprise. I was blown away by the conference table covered with eggs, ham, bacon, fresh fruit and an array of pastries. I mindlessly uttered, “I don’t know what to say.” “Well, say something so we can eat!” Rita insisted. Steve chimed in, “No surprise there!” She sucked her teeth then said, “You don’t wanna mess with me Steve; you already got one black eye!” I figured Rita could take him if it came to that so I suggested we go ahead and eat.

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FiftyFifty-eight Resting in peace e arrived at the funeral home late because of the rush hour traffic. The viewing was scheduled for seven thirty and it was already after eight. I was relieved that the parking lot wasn’t packed because I wasn’t in the mood for a crowd. I prayed that I could handle the sight of Randy in a casket. All I wanted to do was spend time with his family then get out of there. We were directed to the chapel where Randy’s body was lying in state. Big John and Miss Hattie sat on the front pew with Michelle and Lil’ John John while the remaining family sat behind them. And then there was the casket. Erica squeezed my hand as we walked toward the front of the chapel. Beads of sweat formed on my forehead as we made the endless trek. I was baffled that the aisle seemed to stretch with each step; as if we weren’t going anywhere. Miss Hattie met us at the front of the chapel and hugged me like there was no tomorrow. After the hug, we continued to hold hands. I noticed how drained she looked; it was as if she had aged ten years since I last saw her. Tears filled her eyes as she said, “Ron, it’s so good to see you; I’m glad you could make it.”

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What’s in in it for me? “It’s good to see you too,” I said with words that clung to my throat. “I want you to meet Erica; she was nice enough to ride down with me.” “It’s nice to meet you,” she said squeezing Erica’s hand. “Any friend of Ron’s is a friend of mine.” I glanced over and waved at Big John and Michelle. Lil’ John John’s tear-stained face brightened a little as he waved. I hoped he somehow understood what was going on. “I’m going out to the lobby to call Aunt Ella and let her know we made it,” Erica said. “Okay, tell her I said hello.” Miss Hattie led me over to the casket. Looking at Randy lying there was like watching time stand still. I can’t remember a time when I could get a word in edgewise and now he was silent. My tears flowed freely as I whimpered, “Why God?” Miss Hattie rubbed my back and said, “Let it all out Ron; that’s the first step in dealing with this.” I knew she was right but that did little to ease my pain. Big John joined us and put his arm around my shoulder. “Ron, are you gonna be okay?” he asked. Struggling to control my tears, I answered, “I’m trying to understand this but it’s just so unfair.” “I feel the same way,” he said. “One minute I’m crying my eyes out and the next I’m so mad I could spit nails!” There was no denying how much Big John loved his son. Randy told me how supportive his father was when he came out to them. He said Big John admitted he always knew he was different from the other boys then hugged him and told him he loved him no matter what. Drying my tears, I said, “I should be asking how you’re

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Christopher Beckwith doing Big John.” He was slow to reply, “It’s been rough but I’ll make it.” We walked over to sit next to Michelle. She put her hand on mine as she leaned over and kissed me on the cheek. Lil’ John John squeaked, “Hey Uncle Ron!” Patting him on the head, I said, “What’s up lil’ man?” “Uncle Randy’s not sleep, he just looks like it.” Attempting to humor him, I asked, “Oh really?” “Yeah, he’s going to Heaven to live with Jesus!” I tried to hold back my tears but they spilled from my eyes as I was instantly touched by his innocence. “Uncle Ron, I wish he didn’t have to go live with Jesus.” Surprised by his reasoning, I said, “I wish Randy didn’t have to go live with Jesus either.” Michelle told me she was glad I could make it. “We would have been here earlier but the traffic held us up,” I replied. “It was a nightmare!” “It means the world to mama that you’re here,” she said. Lil John John was clearly hanging onto our every word as he added, “It means the world to me too!” “Now who was talking to you?” Michelle asked. “This is a conversation for grown folks.” “I am grown,” he stressed. “Mama Hattie told me I was her little man for being so good today; she said I was acting all grown up!” Michelle struggled with her laugher as she said, “Okay, but don’t get too grown; remember I’m still mama!” He softly responded, “Yes ma’am.” Miss Hattie went back to the casket. She reached down to straighten Randy’s tie then softly said, “I love you son.” Big John joined his wife at the casket and asked, “Honey,

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What’s in in it for me? are you okay?” Miss Hattie stood there unable to tear herself away. Big John decided not to press the issue wrapping his arm around her instead. In that moment, her mood went from sorrow to serenity. “I’m ready,” she said, “we’ve been here long enough.” Big John cleared his throat as he turned to the gathering. “I just want to thank y’all for coming; it means so much to have family around to help us through this tragedy. We can’t tell you how much we appreciate your prayers. Now if y’all don’t mind, I’d like to say a prayer before we leave.” The chapel was blanketed in silence as we stood for the prayer. I’d never known Big John to be a religious man but extreme circumstances can cause sudden changes in people. Big John asked us to bow our heads as he prepared to pray. “Father, I may not understand why you called Randy home but I accept the fact that your will must be done. Please wrap your arms around us as we push through this painful period. And last, I ask that you welcome my son as he takes his place at the foot of your throne. A single tear coated my cheek as we said, “Amen.” There was an odd silence in the chapel as if we’d seen a side of Big John that no one had seen before. Then he made the announcement that everyone was waiting to hear. “Y’all are welcome to come by the house to eat. There’s plenty of food and Lord knows we’ll never eat it all. Thanks for coming and we’ll see you at the house.” Miss Hattie asked if we were coming by to eat. That didn’t take much thought since I didn’t feel like socializing. I just wanted to spend some time with Randy. “I’m not hungry; I think I’ll stay here a little longer.”

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Christopher Beckwith “There’s plenty of food if you wanna come by,” she said. I had no intention of going to her house but I told her I’d call if we decided to stop by.” “All right sweetie,” she said reaching out to hug me. Michelle came over to give me a hug. “It’s so good to see you Ron. Try to come by to get something to eat before you head to the hotel.” Once I was sure her mother was out of earshot, I said, “I doubt I’ll make it Michelle; I’m not in the mood for a crowd.” I laughed when she told me she wouldn’t be bothered if she didn’t live there. “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” I softly replied, “Yeah, I guess you will.” Lil’ John John looked over her shoulder waving wildly as he said, “Bye bye Uncle Ron.” Returning the wave, I said, “I’ll see you later lil’ man.” I went back to the casket and looked at my buddy. All at once, a flurry of memories filled my head. I recalled Randy telling the brash server at The Varsity that her salary couldn’t cover the cost of his burger. Then there was the time he suggested the cranky cashier at Kroger try doing it doggie style because the missionary position was making the back of her head flat. Randy had always made me laugh and now all I could do was cry. I looked at my watch and realized I’d been in the chapel for nearly twenty minutes. What amazed me was Erica never complained. I knew I shouldn’t keep her waiting but it was just so hard to leave. “I love you Randy,” I said then headed out to meet her. Erica was on the phone when I walked out of the chapel. “Ron just stepped out so I’m sure he’s ready to go,” she said. Handing me the phone, she told me Miss Ella wanted

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What’s in in it for me? to talk to me. Miss Ella sweetly asked, “How ya’ doing Ronnie?” I joked, “I’m doing the best I can with what I got!” Her laughter brought a smile to my face. “Ronnie, I already told you to lean on God for strength so I won’t burden you with any more scriptures. Just know that God is a good God and he’s got a plan for everything!” “Thank you Miss Ella, that really means a lot.” “You’re welcome sweetie; I just wanted to tell you how much I love you.” “I know Miss Ella but it helps to hear it!” I replied before handing the phone back to Erica. I always enjoy talking to Miss Ella but this time it meant more than anything. “Let’s get out of here,” Erica suggested. “We’ve got a big day tomorrow!” “You’re right,” I said. “Let’s go!”

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FiftyFifty-nine We’re movin’ on up!

developed a case of buyer’s remorse as we pulled into the parking lot of the Super 8 Motel. I was disappointed because the online pictures were more inviting than the actual hotel. I would have insisted we stay somewhere else if it hadn’t been too late to cancel the reservation. Erica could tell I wasn’t feeling the hotel. “Don’t worry about it,” she said. “It’s only one night.” “Yeah, I just hope it’s not a long night!” “I’ve stayed in worse places and I survived,” Erica said. “We’ll be fine.” My fears eased as I walked into the clean lobby. “I hope the room is this nice,” I muttered. I was greeted by a Middle Eastern woman that was so short I could barely see her over the counter. “You are here to check in sir?” she asked in an earnest attempt at English. “Yes, my name is Ronald Davis.” After processing the reservation, she asked if I needed one key or two. “One key will be fine.” “Your room is 127 at the end of the building,” she said. “Enjoy yourself with us.” “I hope to,” I replied before walking out into the cold. Starting the engine, Erica asked if everything was okay.

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What’s in in it for me? “Yeah, we’re right over here in room 127.” I was relieved that she located a parking space in front of the room—I was tired and ready to relax. We grabbed our bags and headed for the room to see what we were in for. I opened the door to what turned out to be a nice room for a budget motel. There was a 27” television in the armoire, the carpet was clean and the beds had fresh linens and were turned down at the corner. Erica said, “This is nicer than I expected.” She tossed her suitcase on one of the beds then went to inspect the bathroom. I didn’t think much of it when Erica pulled the shower curtain back but I couldn’t help laughing when I heard the toilet seat smack the tank. Relieved, Erica said, “Okay, I can deal with this.” I kicked off my shoes as she picked up the remote. She hit the power button then flipped through the channels stopping at a rerun of The Jefferson’s. “We could use a little laughter up in here,” she said. I mentioned that it was one of Randy’s favorite shows. “He knew Florence’s lines better than she did; he would beat her to the punch every time she cracked on George.” I sprawled across the bed as Erica hung her dress on the rack. As I watched the show, I thought it was strange that every time Marla Gibbs spoke, I heard Randy’s voice instead. I tried to convince myself that my mind was playing tricks on me but it was a waste of time. I thought about Sam and decided to call him. I figured I should get undressed and crawl under the covers first. I usually sleep nude but I thought I should keep on my tee shirt and boxers since Erica was with me. She pulled a toiletry bag and nightgown out of her suit-

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Christopher Beckwith case then headed for the bathroom to get changed. I reached for my phone and located Sam’s number. After a couple rings, he answered, “Bob’s blowjob shop; how can we service you?” “Oh, I’m sorry; I must have the wrong number.” Sam shot back, “Hang up and I’ll fly to Macon and whip your ass!” He seemed intrigued when I asked, “You promise?” “So you’re into that stuff, huh?” “Well, I’m open-minded so you never know!” He quickly said, “I’ll have to remember that!” I laughed at his attempt to cheer me up; it was working. “So Ron, I guess you guys made it to Macon.” “Yeah, we’ve been here a little over an hour,” I said even though it felt like it had been longer. Sam told me he was glad we made it and asked if I was doing okay. I was feeling a little playful so I replied, “I’m doing the best I can with what I got!” His response was an uncertain, “Okay.” “Baby, it’s a long story,” I chuckled. “Well, maybe you can fill me in the next time I see you.” I didn’t hesitate to ask, “And when will that be?” “You never know, it could be sooner than you think!” “Unless you’re outside this room right now it wouldn’t be soon enough!” He seductively asked, “Is that so?” “Um hmm, I really miss you Sam.” “I miss you more,” he said. I challenged him to a bet but he said, “I’m not a betting man so I’ll just have to take your word for it!”

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What’s in in it for me? “Just wait until I see you and I’ll show you!” His voice turned lusty as he replied, “That’s what’s up!” I was saying goodbye when Erica came out of the bathroom with her locks secured in a silk scarf. My expression must have proved he held a special place in my heart because Erica’s smile was bigger than mine. “I guess he misses you, huh?” Cuddling my pillow, I replied, “That’s what he says.”

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Sixty Sixty Where is he?

he mall’s thinning crowd was a sign that it was getting late. It always irritated me that Randy was late whenever we had plans; the movie was starting in minutes and I was still waiting. What’s worse was the bench was making my ass numb. I went over to see what the holdup was. I ducked under the security gate and saw Randy vacuuming. “We’re gonna miss the beginning of the movie!” I yelled. I was no match for the noisy motor so I went over and tapped Randy on the shoulder to get his attention. He turned off the vacuum and asked what was wrong. I tried to answer but once I realized the vacuum wasn’t plugged in, I couldn’t find my voice. I was thinking, ‘What the…’ but my train of thought was interrupted when he was suddenly surrounded by a soft glow before I could complete my thought. I’d never seen him look so peaceful—so calm. All of a sudden, his image began to fade. “Go on and enjoy the movie,” Randy said. “Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine.” I was awakened by a clap of thunder. Dazed, I started to cry once I realized it was just a dream. I wanted to go back to sleep so I could spend a little more time with him. The dream only distressed me more as I struggled with the reality that I

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What’s in in it for me? was in Macon to bury my best friend. “Damn!” escaped my lips as I wiped my eyes. It was raining so hard it seemed like the heavens were crying in harmony with my tears. Not only did we have to bury Randy; we had to do it in the rain. Just the thought of it angered me. Why did we have to come to Macon? Why did it have to rain? Why did Randy have to die? The empty bed let me know that Erica was getting ready for the funeral. It was hard to tell the difference between the shower and the rain then the water stopped but the rain’s sorrowful song continued. I was reminded of Randy when Erica stepped out of the bathroom. She had a towel wrapped around her body with another tied around her head like Randy did on road trips. It was ironic that I suddenly noticed how beautiful she was. Erica offered me a smile and asked how I was doing. “I’m doing the best I can with what I got!” I sighed. Shaking her head, Erica said, “You’ve been spending too much time around Aunt Ella!” I forced myself to sit up as Erica sat next to me. She put her arm around me and said, “I didn’t meet Randy but I’m sure he loved you as much as you loved him. Deep in my heart, I know he’s smiling down on you.” Erica’s words were typical of someone trying to comfort you and they were just that, comforting. “I know it’s hard but you’ve got to get ready,” she said. “Do it for Randy; do it for his mother.” I hugged Erica and thanked her for coming with me. “You don’t have to thank me,” she replied. “That’s what friends are for.” Thinking how surreal the whole scenario was, I grabbed

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Christopher Beckwith my toiletry bag and dragged myself to the bathroom. I was in a strange hotel room with a woman I barely knew about to attend my closest friend’s funeral. I stepped in the shower and closed my eyes as the water hugged me. Randy’s death had consumed me for days and now I was able to rely on a shower for comfort. When I walked out, Erica was wearing the powder blue dress she pulled from her suitcase the night before. She said she wanted to wear something other than typical black. I hugged Erica as I realized how lucky I was to have her with me. “You look beautiful,” I said. She was thanking me with one breath and chastising me in the next. “Hurry up; we don’t wanna be late!” “Yes ma’am!” I responded like a scolded child. I was surprised to see my ironed clothes waiting on the bed. Ironing for me was just another example of Erica’s kindness because I remembered leaving them in a heap. Before I could thank her, she said, “Don’t mention it.” I reached for my new Kenneth Cole wing tips as I remembered how I could hardly wait to wear them. At that point, I would have given anything if I didn’t have to wear them. After getting dressed, I went over to the mirror to tie my tie. I looked at the face of the stranger staring back at me as I attempted to tie a full Windsor but I couldn’t remember how to make the knot. I tried flipping it around then over but that didn’t work. I flipped it under and around but that didn’t work either. “I wear a fucking tie everyday and now I can’t even tie this shit; what’s wrong with me!” Without saying a word, Erica moved my hands, tied the knot to perfection then folded my collar down before patting

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What’s in in it for me? me on my shoulders. She hugged me and whispered, “You look perfect.” Forcing a smile, I said, “Then I guess we can go.”

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SixtySixty-one The bottom falls out

was glad that Erica offered to drive because I was in no shape to get behind the wheel. I asked her to stop at the liquor store so I could pick up a bottle of Jack Daniel’s. I thought it was the perfect gift because of the many times I polished off a bottle of Jack with Randy and Big John. Mack was in front of the liquor store trading lies with two of his buddies. There was no question that he was once a good-looking brotha but the bottle robbed him of his looks. Randy admitted to slipping Mack a few dollars back in the day to entice him to unleash the monster in his pants. The last time we were in Macon, Mack was hanging out at the same liquor store and Randy told me he wouldn’t touch him with a ten foot pole now. Mack recognized me and rushed over as I got out of the car. In his usual frantic pitch, he told me how sorry he was about Randy. Surprised by his compassion, I said, “Thanks Mack.” “I can’t believe it!” he added putting his arm around me. I pulled away as I told him I couldn’t believe it either. Scratching his prickly beard, he said, “I wanted to go to the funeral but I know Miss Hattie wouldn’t want me there.” “Yeah Mack, you’re probably right.” His spirit faded as he said, “Just tell her I’m sorry.”

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What’s in in it for me? I felt bad for him so I promised I would. I wasn’t surprised when he asked, “Think you could let me hold some change on your way out?” Without looking back, I told him I’d see what I could do. Sure enough, he was waiting when I walked out. I don’t know what came over me but I handed him a five dollar bill. He shook my hand so hard I thought my arm would pop out of its socket. Mack uttered, “Man, you just made my day!” “Randy would have wanted you to have it,” I said. Mack was staring at the bill like a winning lottery ticket when we pulled off. I was hoping he would think of Randy during his celebration. I was surprised when my phone rang. It was Bryan so I answered to see how far away they were. “Hey Ron, have you left the hotel yet?” “We’re headed to the house now; are you on your way?” “Yeah, we just got off of the freeway,” he said. “Then I guess I’ll see you guys soon.” Bryan sighed, “Yeah, I guess so.” Cars were lining both sides of the street as we neared the house. I noticed a Ford Taurus headed in our direction and realized it was Richard and Bryan. “Erica, that looks like the friends I’m meeting,” I said. Richard lowered his window as he pulled up next to us. “Haaaay,” the duo sang out through the small opening. I motioned to the vacant space and said, “You can park behind us.” Richard replied, “Okay, I see it.” Erica reached in the back seat for her umbrella and said, “There you go sweetie.”

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Erica reached for her umbrella and said, “There you go.” Realizing she wasn’t about to budge, I responded, “Here comes Captain Save-A-Ho!” Richard and Bryan rushed toward us as I helped Erica out of the car. We made a mad dash for the house trying to shield ourselves with the inadequate umbrellas. There were three men on the porch puffing away while discussing Randy’s death. I stopped in my tracks as one of them described how he was murdered. “I heard he got killed by one of them dick pimps up in Atlanta,” he said. “I don’t feel sorry for him; I’m just here for Hattie and Big John.” Richard and Bryan ignored the rain as they shot the asshole shady looks. I was about to go off just as Erica grabbed my arm and pulled me up the stairs. I reached for the doorknob but it slipped from my grip as the door opened. I nearly lost my balance as Lil’ John John ran out and wrapped his arms around my legs. “Hey Uncle Ron!” he shrieked in his tiny but loud voice. “Hey lil’ man!” I chuckled. “Mama Hattie told me I could have some cake if I was a good boy today,” he said. “I hope I can be good all day!” I laughed realizing it would take work for Lil’ John John to be good all day. My friends followed as he pulled me through the living room. He stopped near the kitchen and said, “I want you to meet my new friend. Wait right here and I’ll go get him!” In a flash, he was gone which gave me a chance to say hello to Big John. I reached out for a shake but was wrapped in a hug instead. I was surprised because Big John had never

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What’s in in it for me? hugged me like that before. With a firm pat to my back, he sighed, “You don’t know how much it means to have you here.” “I loved Randy like a brother,” I said. “I had to be here.” I handed him the bag and told him it was a little something to help take the edge off. His smile widened when he peeked inside. “Ron, I was hoping I’d get a visit from my old friend Jack today!” “Big John, I must have I left my manners in Atlanta. This is Richard and Bryan and of course you remember Erica.” “Yes, I remember Erica. It’s good to see you again.” She smiled and said, “It’s good to see you too!” I was surprised when he reached out to hug Richard and Bryan. He offered them a warm smile and said, “Thanks for coming today.” Miss Hattie was in the kitchen talking about all the food. There were pans of this and casseroles of that everywhere. “I don’t know what we’re gonna do with all this food,” she said. “I wasn’t expecting this much.” Knowing funerals, I was sure it wouldn’t go to waste. Michelle noticed me and said, “Well look who’s here!” Miss Hattie spun around and said, “Get your narrow tail over here and give me a hug!” I did as I was told finding myself wrapped in her arms. After an enduring hug, she reached for Erica’s hand and told her it was good to see her. Erica’s response was a simple, “Thanks for having me.” I introduced Richard and Bryan and explained that I met them through Randy. Miss Hattie thanked them for coming then said she was surprised she hadn’t met them before.

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Christopher Beckwith Richard said, “Randy invited me over to meet you and your husband once but I was working.” “We haven’t met but I’ve had plenty of your leftovers,” Bryan said. “I made it my business to go by and get a plate whenever Randy brought food back. Girl, you can burn!” A flattered Miss Hattie responded, “Thank you baby.” I introduced the guys to Michelle and her aunt Esther. “I finally get to meet Richard and Bryan,” Michelle said. “Don’t ever cross me, I’ve got plenty of dirt on both of y’all!” They doubled over laughing at the warning. “So there are two divas in this family!” Richard gasped. “Two divas?” Esther snapped. “These broads wouldn’t know what a diva was if it wasn’t for me!” Bryan coughed up a hearty laugh as he said, “I like this one already!” Lil’ John John charged in with a cute puppy. Holding the bundle of fur up, he squeaked, “Uncle Ron, this is Hercules!” Playing along, I said, “It’s nice to meet you Hercules.” Lil’ John John eagerly advised, “Someday he’s gonna be as big as me!” I couldn’t help laughing as I replied, “I’m sure he will.” A stocky man stepped into the kitchen to tell us we were about to leave. The nametag on his slightly worn black suit identified him as the funeral director. “Would y’all come into the living room for a word of prayer?” he asked. Michelle told her son to take Hercules to the back porch. “Okay mommy,” he said racing toward the back door. “And don’t forget to lock the screen door so he won’t get out,” she added. Without turning back, he shouted, “Okay mommy!”

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What’s in in it for me? Squeezing my hand, Miss Hattie said, “I guess this is it.” I returned the squeeze as I replied, “Yeah, I guess so.” I took a deep breath as we followed the funeral director. I couldn’t believe the moment I was dreading had arrived.

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SixtySixty-two two Leaning on the everlasting arms

he funeral was held at the church where Miss Hattie had been a member since childhood. The church had been around for years and most of the aging parishioners were lifelong members. The building was well-kept and its beautiful stained glass windows looked magnificent even while being pelted by the pouring rain. My friends and I huddled together as we rushed toward the church. “Oh, there’s Cynthia,” Erica said when a blue Mercedes S Class pulled into the parking lot. There was no denying Cynthia was a true AKA as she stepped out and rushed back to get Teddy. She was dressed in a pink dress and pink strappy platform shoes. Teddy also looked sharp in his little gray pinstriped suit and shiny black loafers. The balancing act of holding the umbrella while carrying Teddy was a struggle as they joined us. “Hey girl!” Erica said. “I was starting to think you might not make it.” Cynthia breathlessly replied, “The rain held us up.” Teddy squeaked, “Hey Miss Erica, where’s Miss Ella?” With a chuckle, Erica answered, “She’s not feeling well so she stayed home.”

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What’s in in it for me? “Oh!” he responded sharply causing us all to laugh. Lil’ John John peeked around Michelle’s leg and offered Teddy a bashful wave. Teddy slowly returned the wave with a cautious smile. I was surprised that Bishop Benson was waiting in the vestibule when the funeral director led us inside. He hugged Miss Hattie then shook Big John’s hand as he asked how they were doing. “We’re okay,” Miss Hattie responded. Big John added, “Much better than I expected.” Bishop Benson said, “That’s good; God bless you both.” Walking into the sanctuary, I thought about the many occasions I had been in the church; Lil’ John John’s baptism, Christmas plays, Easter programs; all happy events. I never expected to attend one as painful as a funeral. The wooden floors creaked as we walked to the casket. I flexed my fingers trying to take my mind off of my trembling legs. Then the funeral director motioned for me and Erica to take our turn at the Mahogany casket. I was moved to tears as I looked at Randy. Erica pulled me close as I faced the reality that this would be the last time I would see my best friend. She led me away once the funeral director motioned for us to take our seats. My eyes remained locked on the casket as we walked around to sit behind Miss Hattie and Big John. Lil’ John John could barely see over the pew, his boyish smile was nowhere to be found as tears flooded his face. My heart ached from the effect that Randy’s death was having on him. I smiled trying to put him at ease but his tears continued to flow. Tears poured from Richard and Bryan’s eyes. I was sure

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Christopher Beckwith they felt responsible since they didn’t do more to stop Randy from leaving the club with Bruce. I was shocked to see Aven near the end of the processional with his eyes locked on me. He looked incredible in his well-fitted navy blue suit. After pausing at the casket, he walked over to hug Miss Hattie and shake Big John’s hand. Their faces expressed a combination of disbelief and appreciation that he was attending the funeral. “I’ll talk to you later,” he mouthed as he walked by me. I was surprised that Aven was at the funeral. There was no reason for him to be there and yet there he was. The service began with a prayer by Alberta Jones. She and Miss Hattie were friends and lifelong church members. The prayer was hard to follow but I was sure it was heartfelt. She asked us to join her in the posture of prayer. “Father God, we come today with heavy hearts. We know that your will must be done Father God and we must lean on you in times of sorrow. Father God, we call on your strength right now. We praise you in the highest Father God and ask you to bestow your grace and mercy on this family. Oh God, wrap your loving arms around them, give them strength Father God and bless them with peace. It is in your merciful name Father God that we pray, Amen!” The air was filled with shouts of Amen and Hallelujah. The spirit-filled celebration continued as Randy’s cousin Carla sang a version of I’ll Fly Away that drove nearly everyone to tears. A moist trail streamed over her cheeks as she offered the inspirational melody; I was moved by the beauty of her voice. One of the Associate Ministers approached the podium

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What’s in in it for me? once Carla had finished the song. After clearing his throat, he said, “Now we will have remarks.” Esther was the first to speak followed by Randy’s friend Danielle Dawson and then his supervisor, Sarah Thompson. That was a shock because he really hated her. Esther’s remarks were short but meaningful. She talked about Randy’s playfulness as a child and how he loved to spend weekends at her house. There was a round of laughter as she reflected on the time he got his head wedged between the stair’s banister rails during one of his visits. Laughing through her tears, Esther joked, “How he got his head between the rails is a mystery to this day. We tried everything to pry him loose but nothing worked. Good ol’ Crisco finally did the trick!” With a soft smile, she ended, “John, Hattie; Randy is in a better place and you are in our prayers.” Next was Danielle Dawson. I’d never met her but I knew she and Randy had a special bond; they talked on the phone constantly. He referred to her as Danielle Dawson-Dawson and said he was amazed that Macon could produce such a diva. She was ‘the baddest bitch!’ he’d say. Randy explained that Danielle was able to keep her last name after marrying Robert Dawson. He said they were enrolled in the same Public Policies class at Fort Valley State and Robert was determined to meet her once he realized they had the same last name; they were inseparable ever since. Danielle pulled a rose from the spray on Randy’s casket. After stepping up to the podium, she began, “This is one of the saddest and yet happiest days of my life. It’s sad for the obvious reason but happy because we’re here celebrating Randy’s life.”

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Christopher Beckwith She inhaled the rose’s aroma then continued her tribute. “The scent of this rose is as sweet as our friendship was. I met Randy in the third grade and we’ve been friends ever since. I loved him for who he was; nothing more, nothing less. Now that he’s gone, there will be an empty space in my heart for as long as I live.” The air was filled with shouts of Amen and Hallelujah. “I would like to read a poem that I wrote to say goodbye to Randy. I wanted to put into words exactly how I feel.” Then she cleared her throat and began: Friendship is a gift beyond compare There’s no way to define its meaning In tears and in smiles you were always there A true friend from the very beginning When loneliness prevailed, it was clear to see Our friendship was like no other Though we were apart, you were still with me My spiritually kindred brother It’s hard not to wonder why God decided to call you home The pain, the sorrow, the tears that I cry Will remind me that I’m never alone “Mr. and Mrs. Richards, I want to thank you for giving me such a wonderful friend. God bless you both.” It’s impossible to describe the emotion in the church as everyone was overcome by the sincerity of Danielle’s words. Then it was time for Sarah to speak. I sat up as she approached the pulpit because I didn’t want to miss a syllable

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What’s in in it for me? of her remarks. The hairs on my neck stood up when I thought I heard Randy whisper, ‘Who asked that bitch to speak at my funeral?’ I was sure my mind was playing tricks on me but for a second, I actually thought he was sitting behind me. Sarah acknowledged Bishop Benson then said, “Mr. And Mrs. Richards, let me say how sorry I am about Randy. I’m not here on behalf of Glacier Mortgage; I wanted to be here.” I was surprised because I wasn’t expecting her to be so sincere. It was hard to believe this was the same woman that Randy despised so much. Then Sarah said, “We didn’t have the best relationship, I stayed on Randy.” I laughed when Sabrina mumbled, “I know that’s right!” “It wasn’t that I didn’t like Randy; I pushed him because I could see his potential.” She dabbed the dangling tear then continued, “Randy was the best Customer Relations Rep in our unit; he could calm the caller down and resolve the issue quicker than anyone. By the end of the call, he would usually have the customer laughing and thanking him for his help.” Laughter filled the air when Sarah said, “Sometimes I’d have to cover my mouth to keep from laughing whenever I monitored his calls. I don’t think Randy knew this but I liked him—a lot. God bless you Randy.” The choir sang a soulful rendition of Soon I Will Be Done that set the stage for Bishop Benson to deliver the eulogy. He acknowledged Big John and Miss Hattie then began, “I’ve come to clear up a misconception. Normally I’d preach for hours but that’s not necessary; this is a straightforward message that I can cover in just a few minutes.” He paused as the sanctuary was engulfed in silence.

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Christopher Beckwith “We must understand that God doesn’t smite us because of our sins; he loves us in spite of them. Just as God forgives us, he has also forgiven Randy. We’re not here to judge him; we’re here to celebrate the life of our brother!” I was relieved that he began on a positive note. I was hoping the eulogy would be uplifting instead of the homophobic rhetoric some ministers spew from the pulpit. Then Bishop Benson explained that God doesn’t hate the sinner, he hates the sin. “I’m bothered when people say God hates homosexuals; God doesn’t hate gays simply because he doesn’t hate. God loves gays, they are his children too. God forgives the adulterer while denouncing adultery; he rebukes addiction but he loves the crack head. We all have vices and while you may feel your vices aren’t as extreme as Randy’s, God’s compassion for gays is no different than the mercy he shows you when you fall short of his grace.” The drummer roused the cymbals as joyous shouts filled the air. Bishop Benson continued, “I’m sure everyone here loved Randy but how many of you passed judgment against him or his lifestyle? John 8:7 teaches us, ‘Let he who is without sin cast the first stone’. None of us are free of sin, not you—not me.” Disappointed by the haunting stillness in the sanctuary, Bishop Benson exclaimed, “Amen somebody!” quickly drawing shouts from the congregation. “I’m here to assure you that there are no greater or lesser sins.” Bishop Benson’s voice grew in intensity as he shouted, “There is no greater arrogance than feeling entitled to God’s grace; he shuns all sin so let me tell you today that salvation is not promised!” Many in the crowd were gripped by the sobering words.

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What’s in in it for me? “Have you stopped to look at your own transgressions?” he asked. “James 1:20 tells us ‘For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God’. No one here today is perfect; if you are breathing then it is so!” He paused as a sudden round of applause filled the air. “How is it that you’re willing to tear your brother down to feel good about yourself? Romans 3:23 tells us that we all have fallen short of the glory of God. The Lord instructs in us Matthew 7:1, ‘Judge not that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged.’ Who are you to point out the speck in your brother’s life when yours is littered with debris? Clean up your own life first, then you can see clearly to help your brother find his way. And that is the Word of God—Amen somebody!” Again the congregation shouted, “Amen!” “I can’t count the number of times I’ve heard people say, ‘Homosexuals should go to Hell!’ or ‘God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!’ Who are we to speak for God; he created Adam, Eve, Steve and every other living creature so how can you tell God he made a mistake?” After pausing to wipe his forehead with a handkerchief, Bishop Benson continued, “How many times have you heard the Word of God and thought of someone else? God wants us to help others see the iniquity in their lives but only after we address our own; that gives power and humility to our words. We’re so quick to testify about what He has taught us through the Word and how we apply it to our lives; that’s how God uses us to reach others. When studying the Word, see if He is using others to show you the flaws in your life!” The organist hit a sharp chord to drive the point home. Drawing to a close, he stated, “Now is the time to take a

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Christopher Beckwith look at your indiscretions; not those of your brother. Think about all of the secrets you carry around and use them as a measure of compassion when you view your brother. And if that’s a problem for you, then God is not your God!” The earth-shaking oration prompted the congregation to shout victoriously as the band blazed into a joyous interpretation of Pass Me Not. Consisting of trumpets, trombones, a tuba and a set of drums, the musicians could rival any New Orleans jazz quartet. Members danced around with tears flooding their faces. This continued for what seemed like hours and minutes all at once. The spirit was so exhilarating that I jumped to my feet. Once the musical tribute was over, the funeral director came to the front of the sanctuary and stated, “There’s an old spiritual that says, ‘I’ve got the Victory!’ Judging from today’s moving celebration, Randy’s finally got his victory!” Again the sanctuary was filled with shouts of, “Amen!” He added, “The family would like to thank you for your kind gestures and ask that you keep them in your prayers.” The funeral director asked everyone to stand with the exception of the family. He joined his associates at the casket and motioned for the flower ladies to help with the flowers and plants. Bishop Benson and his associates led the recessional out of the sanctuary then the pallbearers and flower ladies were trailed by the funeral staff with the casket. Next, the family was followed by the remaining guests. The rain ceased as the ushers opened the doors. Rays of sunshine peeked through the clouds as they rolled away in a scene reminiscent of the parting of the Red Sea. Miss Hattie’s eyes filled as the sun’s rays shone down on her but this time

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What’s in in it for me? they were tears of joy. At that point, she knew her son was finally home. Big John wrapped his arm around Miss Hattie as they walked down the steps. Michelle and Lil’ John John followed as the funeral director escorted them to the limousine. Miss Hattie reached for my hand and asked if I wanted to ride with them. I told Erica that I’d see her at the cemetery then watched as she walked away with our friends. Once the casket was in the hearse, the motorcade pulled away from the church. The aura in the limo was completely still as I gazed out the window. It was strange to watch the rest of the world go on with their day totally oblivious to our sorrow as we made our way through the surrounding neighborhood. Raindrops fell like tears from the trees as we entered the cemetery. The remaining drops glistened like crystal as they clung to the leaves; it was one of the most beautiful sights I’d ever seen. The driver asked us to wait in the limo while the casket was transferred to the gravesite. Before getting out, she gave us latex shoe covers to protect our feet from the saturated ground. I’d never seen that before and was impressed by the generous token. Miss Hattie’s tears returned as the pallbearers pulled the casket from the hearse and carried it to its final resting place. I held her hand making a pointless attempt to hold back my tears. The moisture coating my cheeks was no surprise; I was about to say goodbye to my closest friend. The driver opened the doors for us once the casket was in place. I suggested that Lil’ John John stay with me so he and Teddy could keep each other occupied while Michelle

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Christopher Beckwith sat with her parents at the gravesite. Aven came over as we gathered around the canopy. “What a surprise seeing you today,” I said. “Like I said before, this case is important to me. I wanted his parents to know I’m dedicated to solving this crime.” “Well, I’m sure they appreciate you being here.” The interment was short but meaningful. Bishop Benson spoke about Randy’s strong will and how he lived his life to the fullest. “It’s been said that a short life well-lived is better than a long life wasted. I may not have agreed with the life Randy led but I respected his passion. We can all take a lesson from Randy; he loved life and lived as if every day was his last.” He paused as parishioners offered an, “Amen!” or an, “I know that’s right!” “John, Hattie; God loved Randy and now he’s at peace. To be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord; don’t cry for Randy because he’s in a better place. May you find comfort in your faith in the weeks to come.” Bishop Benson proceeded to the committal: “In sure and certain hope of the resurrection to eternal life through our Lord Jesus Christ, we commend to Almighty God our brother, Randall Lamar Richards. We commit his body to the ground, earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust. May the Lord bless him and keep him, may the Lord make his face to shine upon him and be gracious unto him, may the Lord lift up his countenance upon him and give him peace.” There was a peaceful calm as Bishop Benson ended by

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What’s in in it for me? asking us to bow our heads in prayer. “Heavenly Father, bless this family in their time of need. It is now more than ever that they need the sanctity of your love and the serenity of your peace. Be with them as they move forward in their grief while calling on you for strength. Let every heart say Amen.” Now that the burial was over, several of the guests came around to hug Miss Hattie and Big John. They thanked the well-wishers for their kindness and asked for their prayers in the trying days ahead. Miss Hattie hugged me then reached for Erica’s hand as she said, “Thank you both for being here today.” After kissing her on the cheek, I told her I wouldn’t have been anywhere else. Miss Hattie turned to Aven and said, “I was surprised to see you. I’m touched that you’re here, thank you so much.” “Don’t mention it,” he said. “It was the least I could do.” She was quick to ask if he was coming by the house. “I don’t think so; I’m meeting my commanding officer to go over the case so I need to get back to Atlanta.” “Can’t you come by to get something to eat?” she asked. “Well, I am hungry; would it be rude if I came by to get a plate to take back with me?” “That’s fine sweetie but I’m gonna make you a sandwich before you leave. You’re not driving up the road hungry!” Aven conceded and told her he would come by for a few minutes but he couldn’t stay long. “That’s fine,” Miss Hattie said, “I want y’all to get plenty to eat; Lord knows we’ll never eat all that chicken!” I joked, “I’m so hungry I could eat most of that chicken.” She shot back, “That’s exactly what I wanted to hear!”

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SixtySixty-three Pass the chicken please

he air inside Miss Hattie’s house carried the aroma of fried chicken from every fast food restaurant imaginable. The counter was cluttered with boxes from Popeye’s, Hardees, KFC, Bojangle’s and Church’s. Ignoring the fast food buffet, Miss Hattie said, “Let me show y’all the good stuff!” She peeled back the foil covering an aluminum pan to reveal the golden baked chicken sent over by her neighbor Eula Brown. “This is the real deal!” she said. Michelle appeared out of the blue and squealed, “I know that’s not Miss Eula’s baked chicken!” Miss Hattie smiled as she said, “It sure is and Doris sent over a red velvet cake too; I hid it in the refrigerator!” “That’s my mama, always on her job!” Michelle said. She called out, “Lil’ John John, are you ready to eat?” He appeared in a flash followed by his new partner in crime. “Yes mama, we’re ready!” he replied eagerly. Lil’ John John seemed to have a prepared answer when she asked the duo what they wanted to eat. Through a wide grin, he recited, “I want some chicken and I want some mac & cheese and I want some green string beans and I want some corn and I want some sweet taters and I want some candy yams and I want…”

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What’s in in it for me? “Lil’ John John, sweet potatoes and candied yams are the same thing,” Michelle said. We erupted with laughter when he proclaimed, “I don’t care; I want both of ‘em!” Then she asked Teddy what he wanted to eat. Before he could respond, Lil’ John John squeaked, “Give him the same thang!” “Okay, I got y’all covered,” Michelle chuckled. She sent them to wash their hands as she searched the Popeye’s box for a couple of chicken legs. “Now I want y’all to get plenty to eat,” Miss Hattie said. “I’ll fix Aven’s plate first since he needs to get going.” Smiling, he replied, “Thank you Ms. Richards.” She responded, “That’s enough of that Ms. Richards stuff; call me Miss Hattie like everybody else!” “I’ll call you whatever you want as long as I get some of this good food!” “Now that’s more like it!” she said. Sorting through the pan, she put a breast and a thigh on a plate before handing it to Aven. “Help yourself to anything and don’t be bashful; take as much as you want.” Aven didn’t have to be told twice; he went right to work loading his plate with a little bit of everything on the counter. “I’ll make a sandwich for you to snack on while you’re driving,” Miss Hattie said. “Do you eat ham?” Aven quickly answered, “I sure do!” “Now aren’t you glad you came by?” I teased. “Ron, I’ll be through with that sandwich before I make it to the freeway!” Miss Hattie handed Aven the sandwich and said, “Save some room for the rest of this food, you hear?”

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Christopher Beckwith “Yes ma’am!” he responded. “Thanks for everything.” “I should be thanking you. I can’t tell you how happy I am that you decided to come today.” “I would say I’m just doing my job but I wanted to be here,” he said. “You’ve really made me feel like family.” Miss Hattie called out to Big John. When he peeked in, she said, “Aven is leaving; will you show him to the door while I help Ron and his friends with their food?” Big John replied, “I’d be happy to.” With a pat to Aven’s back, he added, “Thank you so much for coming.” Aven simply responded, “Thanks for having me.” I rubbed his back and told him it was good to see him. “I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?” “Make sure you do,” he said heading out of the kitchen. When Miss Hattie asked Erica which pieces of chicken she wanted, she politely answered, “I’ll take a thigh.” “You only want one piece?” A surprisingly soft-spoken Erica said, “Yes, one is fine.” Miss Hattie snapped, “Child, you ain’t leaving my house hungry!” then put two thighs on her plate. Erica conceded with a respectful, “Yes ma’am!” My mouth watered from the sight of the baked chicken. It was so tender that it fell off the bone as Miss Hattie lifted it from the pan to Erica’s plate. She handed the plate to Erica then gave me a stern look as she asked, “Ron, what pieces of chicken do you want?” We all laughed at her emphasis on the word ‘pieces’. “I know better than to ask for a breast so I’ll take a breast and a wing,” I replied. Satisfied with my response, Miss Hattie loaded my plate with a breast making sure to double up on the wings.

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What’s in in it for me? Lil’ John John rushed in with Teddy on his heels. “We’re ready to eat!” he shouted. Michelle told them to have a seat while she brought their plates over. “Okay mommy,” he said pulling out a chair for Teddy. When Michelle brought the food, Lil’ John John grabbed the chicken leg intent on taking a bite. “Aren’t you forgetting something?” she asked. “Oh yeah, I’m sorry mommy!” He put the chicken leg back on his plate then clasped his hands together before ordering Teddy to do the same. Once his buddy had obliged, he sang a choppy, “God is great and God is good, let us thank him for our food, by his hands we all are fed, give us Lord our daily bread.” He and Teddy finished with a powerful, “Amen!” He picked up the chicken leg but before taking a bite he asked, “Mommy, can Uncle Ron and Miss Erica sit with us?” “If it’s all right with them; it’s fine with me.” I was relieved by his request. I didn’t want to eat with a bunch of strangers and now I didn’t have to. It was clear that Erica was also thankful as she took the seat next to Teddy. “We’d be happy to sit with you guys,” she said. Lil’ John John stopped short of taking a bite as he waited for us to follow his lead. We indulged him by taking our first bite together. He happily hummed, “Umm um!” Trying to chew and smile at the same time, there was no question that Teddy was also enjoying the chicken. Miss Hattie dished up food for our friends as we nibbled from our overstuffed plates. We tried to wait but everything was so good.

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Christopher Beckwith I wondered how we could keep our crew together since there were only two seats left. As if on cue, Big John walked in with chairs for my friends. “I figured y’all would want to sit together so you’ll need these,” he said. “Mr. Richards, are you trying to keep us from the other guests?” Bryan asked. “No, I just thought y’all might want some privacy from the common folk.” We laughed when Michelle said, “Didn’t you know this was the VIP section?” Our friends rushed to catch up once they were seated. Sabrina moaned, “Ms. Richards, this food is delicious!” “Honey, I can’t take the credit; I didn’t cook a thing!” Cynthia told Miss Hattie she was definitely coming back for some of her cooking. “Randy’s big butt proved you know your way around the kitchen!” Lil’ John John and Teddy’s infectious giggles let us know they hadn’t expected to hear us talking about Randy’s butt at the kitchen table. Tiffany asked, “Can y’all believe Sarah?” “She was the last person I expected to see,” Cynthia said. “She’d have more friends at work if she was always that nice,” Tiffany added. Sabrina uttered, “Child, don’t hold your breath!” Once we were done, I started gathering the plates but Miss Hattie told me not to bother. “We’ll get ‘em later.” “Are you sure?” I asked. “You know I don’t mind.” She waved off my question and asked me to come with her. She led me to Randy’s room and said, “Close the door, I have something I wanna show you.”

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What’s in in it for me? I didn’t know what to expect when she opened a dresser drawer. I recognized the intricately-carved wooden box Miss Hattie was holding as she turned around. I couldn’t believe it when she said she wanted me to have it. She handed me the box and said, “Go ahead, open it.” My eyes watered as I looked inside. The box was filled with shimmering ice but it was the diamond-beveled Cartier watch that got my attention. “I can’t take this; Randy loved his jewelry.” “Ron, he would want me to do this; he loved you like a brother,” she said. I couldn’t believe Miss Hattie’s kindness. When I told her I didn’t know what to say, she snapped, “Then don’t say nothing Ron ‘cause I’m not taking no for an answer!” “I don’t know how to thank you,” I said. “Sweetie, having you here is thanks enough!” I hugged her whispering, “I love you so much.” “Ron, I love you too and don’t ever forget it!” I couldn’t take my eyes off of the gift as I followed her downstairs. I was touched because I wanted something to remember Randy by but I never expected anything like that. My friends were talking to Michelle while Lil’ John John and Teddy played with Hercules. “Are you ready to go?” Erica asked. “I need to get back so I can check on Aunt Ella.” I simply responded, “Yeah, I’m ready.” When Erica asked me what was in the box, Miss Hattie answered, “It’s just a little something I wanted Ron to have.” I kissed her on the cheek and thanked her for the gift. “You don’t have to thank me; it’s the least I can do!”

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Christopher Beckwith Teddy’s eyes lit up when Lil’ John John asked if he could spend the night. Expecting the question, Michelle replied, “I’m sorry Lil’ John John but Teddy has to go home.” “But can’t you take him home tomorrow?” Michelle knew she’d have to explain from a perspective that he could understand so she asked if he remembered the drive to Atlanta to visit Uncle Randy. Lil’ John John replied, “Yes, I remember.” “And remember you kept asking why it was taking so long to get there?” His answer was a soft, “Yes.” “Well, that’s where Teddy lives; do you wanna ride that far just to take him home?” We exploded with laughter as he replied, “Mm hmm!” Coming to Michelle’s rescue, Cynthia told Lil’ John John that Teddy had to go to school. “He can spend the weekend with you some other time, okay?” “You mean Teddy can spend two nights?” he squeaked. They jumped with excitement when she answered, “He sure can Lil’ John John.” “You know they’re gonna hold you to that,” I said. “I know Ron but it’s a promise I can keep. Ted’s parents live in Albany so we drive through here all the time.” “Well, he’s always welcome,” Miss Hattie said. Big John came over just as we were saying goodbye. He thanked my friends for coming then hugged me even tighter than before. “Ron, don’t let me come to Atlanta looking for you!” he warned. “You’re still family.” I let him know he couldn’t get rid of me that easily.

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What’s in in it for me? Lil’ John John and Teddy darted off for a quick game of tag as Miss Hattie walked us outside. When Erica thanked Miss Hattie for a wonderful dinner, she said, “You’re welcome sweetie, come back to see me!” “I’ll tag along the next time Ron comes for a visit.” Miss Hattie stressed, “I’m gonna hold you to that!” She hugged Teddy before telling us to be careful driving back. As I was getting in the car, she added, “Be sure to call me when you get home so I’ll know you made it!” My wink assured her I would.

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SixtySixty-four four On the road again

was relieved that Erica offered to drive. Aside from an occasional big rig or SUV, there wasn’t much traffic as we zipped through middle Georgia’s quiet terrain. All I wanted to do was relax and enjoy the short ride home. The Quiet Storm segment that Erica located on a smooth R&B station proved to be the perfect lullaby but my cell rang as I started to drift off. ‘Who in the hell is this?’ I thought. I answered to a warm, “Hello sexy.” My heartbeat quickened as the welcome sound of Sam’s voice sailed through the phone. A smile pulled at my lips as I replied, “Hey Mister, it’s good to hear your voice.” “It’s good to hear yours too; so how was your day?” “It was a beautiful service and Miss Hattie really seemed peaceful. I was afraid it might be too much for her but I think she’ll be okay.” “The next few weeks will really be hard on her,” he said. “She’ll need you more than ever.” Realizing he was right, I responded, “Yeah, I know.” “Ron, I was gonna send you something since I couldn’t be there then I remembered I don’t have your address.” Unsure if I was trying to convince him or myself, I said, “That’s nice but it’s not necessary; I’ll be fine.” “Too late, I’ve already gotten your gift,” he chuckled.

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What’s in in it for me? I was instantly touched by his kindness. “Ron, I’m right in the middle of something so let me go ahead and get your address.” I gave Sam my address and promised to call him when I got home. “Okay, I’ll be waiting,” he said. I was pinned against the seat as Erica pushed the speedometer past the 90 MPH mark. I casually said, “Atlanta’s not going anywhere Erica.” Mocking me with an upturned nose, she hissed, “I know Atlanta’s not going anywhere!” She eased off the accelerator even though she was determined to make it home in record time. “Ron, you shouldn’t be alone,” she said. “Why don’t you spend the night with us?” I didn’t feel like going home to my empty apartment so I agreed and said, “Sounds like fun.” “Good, I’m sure Aunt Ella would love to see you.” “I’d love to see her too; I’ll grab a bottle of wine when we get to my place and we can head out.”

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Christopher Beckwith

SixtySixty-five What the hell!

must have dozed off because we were exiting the freeway before I knew it. I thought of Sam as we waited for the light to change. Our brief conversation reminded me how much I missed him so I reached for my cell to call him. I was disappointed when his voicemail picked up. After the beep, I said, “Hey you. I just wanted to let you know I’m almost home. Erica didn’t think I should be alone tonight so she asked me to stay at her place; I think she just wants some company. Anyway, call me when you get this.” Erica turned into my complex and said, “Ron, I’m gonna go in with you so I can use your restroom.” I chuckled, “Okay, I’ll grab some fresh clothes while you handle your business.” Halfway up the stairs, I noticed a man standing near my door with his back to us. Ready to bolt back down the stairs if I had to, I barked, “Yo man, can I help you?” The surprisingly familiar voice replied, “You can come up here and let me show you how much I missed you!” I couldn’t believe it when Sam stepped closer with outstretched arms. “What the hell!” I shouted as I rushed up the stairs and punched him playfully.

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What’s in in it for me? “I told you I had a gift for you and here I am,” he said. “I was already at the airport when I called so I had to come up with something; I wanted to surprise you.” “Mission accomplished!” I snapped. When I asked how long he’d been waiting, he said, “Not long, thirty minutes or so. If you didn’t show up soon, I was gonna call and tell you they wouldn’t deliver the gift unless you signed for it. I had it all mapped out!” Erica cleared her throat to get my attention. Until then, I was so caught up that I forgot she standing was there. “Excuse me Sam, this is Erica,” I said. “So this is Sam the stalker,” she joked. “I’m just kidding; it’s nice to meet you.” Hugging her, he replied, “Same here.” Then Erica asked, “Ron, I guess you won’t be staying at my place after all, huh?” I playfully responded, “Well now, let me see—no!” “I ain’t mad atcha!” she said with a snap of her fingers. When I unlocked the door, she rushed in and found the restroom without asking directions. Dropping his bag, Sam wrapped his arms around me before she had the door closed. “I missed you so much,” he said before kissing me. We tried every angle to get at each other’s lips with the kiss lasting the whole time Erica was gone. “It was nice meeting you Sam but I gotta get going,” she said stepping out of the bathroom. “You don’t have to leave because of me,” he replied. She chuckled, “I’m not so sure Ron would agree.” In a voice just shy of naughty, Sam asked, “Oh really?” “Yeah, we were headed to my place but I guess all that’s changed; I’m sure he’ll be in good hands.”

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Christopher Beckwith With a confident smile, Sam replied, “Without a doubt!” “I’m gonna go,” she said. “I need to check on my aunt.” Erica was surprised when Sam asked how Miss Ella was doing. “She’s much better; I think she’s just glad to be home.” “God is good!” Sam said. Erica quickly added, “All the time!” Their instant rapport brought a smile to my face. She gave me a hug as she whispered, “He’s a keeper!” “I simply responded, “Yeah, I know.” After the hug, she told me to call if I needed anything. “I think I have everything I need right here!” I said with a wink. I told Sam to make himself comfortable while I walked Erica to her car. “There’s wine in the refrigerator, hint-hint.” He said, “Bye Erica, thanks for taking care of my…well, thanks for taking care of Ron.” She sweetly replied, “Don’t mention it!” As we walked outside, Erica said, “I really like Sam.” “Is that so?” I teased. “Yeah Ron, he seems nice and he’s sexy too!” “Don’t get any ideas chick, that brotha is all mine!” Once I had her luggage in the trunk, she said, “Now get upstairs and have a good time with that cutie pie!” “Baby, that’s exactly what I plan to do!”

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What’s in in it for me?

SixtySixty-six Two’s company am had kicked his shoes off and was sitting on the sofa when I walked in. I was glad to see two wine glasses next to a lit candle on the coffee table. The only thing missing was music so I loaded the CD changer and hit play. I laughed at Sam’s big toe peeking through a hole in his sock. That’s what I like about him; he’s so down to earth. “This is the nicest thing anybody has ever done for me,” I said as I sat next to him. “I wanted to be with you after everything you’ve been through; I know it’s been hard.” “So how long are you gonna be here?” I asked. “I’m just staying the night, I gotta work tomorrow.” “Don’t remind me, I have to work tomorrow too.” Reaching for the wine glasses, Sam said, “That’s why we should make the most of tonight.” He rubbed my back as he handed one to me. “I know we just met but I’m really feeling you Ron. I can just relax and be myself around you; I can’t say that about other guys.” “I feel the same way, nobody wants to date anymore; it’s all about hooking up!” “I’m the exception so call me old-fashioned!” he replied. This incredible man made every effort to show me that

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Christopher Beckwith true love was still possible and I was convinced. “Sam, I couldn’t have asked for a better gift.” “I’m glad you like it; I hope it fits!” he chuckled. I laughed as I responded, “Oh, it fits!” We grinned as we gazed into each other’s eyes. I finally said, “I can’t believe you’re here!” “Let me prove it,” he whispered leaning in for a kiss. I didn’t close my eyes, I was afraid to risk opening them to find out it was only a dream. “I’m sure you could use a massage,” Sam said. “Let’s get you out of these clothes.” I stopped him as I remembered my promise to call Miss Hattie. “I’d love a massage but I have to make a call first.” Sam was clearly puzzled as he replied, “I’m trying to get you out of your clothes and all you can think about is getting on the phone!” “I promised Miss Hattie that I would call her when I got home; give me a minute and it’s on!” That got Sam’s attention so he sat back and allowed me to make the call. I could tell Michelle was tired the instant she picked up the phone. “Hey Michelle; It’s Ron,” I said. “Oh hey Ron, I guess y’all made it back.” “Yeah, I promised to call your mom when I got home.” “She’s saying goodbye to the last of the guests; want me to get her?” Looking at Sam, I said, “No, I’ll call her later.” “Good, I’m so tired of these folks I could scream—I just wanna get out of these clothes and in the bed!” “Me too,” I said even though I was sure she had no idea

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What’s in in it for me? why I was agreeing. I asked her to give everyone my love then said goodbye. With that out of the way, I said, “Okay sir, I’m ready for my massage.” He lustfully responded, “Whatever you say Mister!” I couldn’t believe he was there but I was happy he was. I started to undo my tie but Sam stopped me and said, “Let me do that.” I laughed as he pulled the tie from my neck; I was totally turned on I was by my personal valet. Tossing my shirt aside, Sam said, “Let me get you out of those pants.” I instantly said, “Okay, whatever you say.” Once I was out of my pants, Sam whispered, “Now let’s see what I can do to help you relax.” I stretched out on the sofa as Sam’s hands soothed my back. I moaned realizing he owned me at that point. That’s when he asked, “Feels good, huh?” It was a struggle but I uttered, “Mm hmm!” Sam’s hands lingered on my back before tugging at the waistband of my boxers. “Let’s get rid of these,” he said. I was more than ready to move beyond the massage so I rolled over and moved in for a kiss. Sam’s tongue slid past my lips making a solid connection with mine. As the kiss ended, I said, “Your clothes are in the way.” He responded, “I can fix that!” I was instantly reminded how good his body looked in candlelight as he pulled his shirt over his head. “Um, um, um!” I moaned. With a quick jerk, the snaps of Sam’s breakaway sweatpants chattered as the fabric ripped from his thick thighs. I

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Christopher Beckwith laughed when my bone jumped with excitement at the entertaining display. After another kiss, he said, “Take me to Heaven!” Sam reached for the candle then followed me. Once we were in the bedroom, I told him make himself comfortable while I grabbed a towel. When I came back, Sam motioned for me to join him on the bed. “Baby, I need you,” he sighed. His lips found my neck as I crawled next to him. I tried to speak but my words were replaced by deep moans as he caressed my quivering cheeks. A sigh escaped my lips as he discovered the hungry opening. I was finally able to relax after the initial shock faded. Lifting my legs, Sam tasted the length of my thighs until they met. His tongue bathed each orb before allowing them to enjoy the warmth of his mouth simultaneously. My groans turned to gasps as my mind spiraled blissfully away. He eased forward teasing my pucker with his wand. “That’s what I want!” he sighed. Once Lil’ Sammy was wrapped in latex, he gripped the packet of lube in his teeth and ripped it open. Then he coated two fingers and drove me through the roof. I laughed as Millie Jackson’s Hurt So Good came to mind. “What’s so funny?” he whispered then laughed as I sang the chorus of the song. My laughter faded as he crawled between my legs and opened the gateway to ecstasy. I wrapped my arms around him as we kissed deeply. Barely moving his lips from mine, Sam asked, “Ron, are you okay?” I softly replied, “I couldn’t be better.”

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What’s in in it for me? “Hold on baby, I’m gonna take you to paradise.” That moment was romantic, passionate and just what I needed. The pleasure was so intense that I thought it would last forever. Sam grunted, “Damn baby, you feel so good!” “You feel…good…too!” I panted. Our bodies seemed to be drawn to each other. “Oh shit!” he grunted from the mounting ecstasy. The escalating tempo proved Sam couldn’t hold out any longer. His last plunge was coupled with a growl as he shuddered. I gasped as his pulsing veins triggered my explosion. I was comforted by his skin when he pulled me closer. He breathlessly whispered, “Ron, I love you.” “I love you too,” I said. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

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SixtySixty-seven Am I dreaming?

didn’t want to open my eyes to the possibility that Sam’s visit was just a dream. Then the sensation of fingertips on my nipples and his warm mouth on my pole confirmed it wasn’t; he was waking me physically and emotionally. I opened my eyes to see Sam working on my wood. The sensation was so amazing that I tugged at the sheets treading the fine line of euphoria. “I was wondering when you were gonna wake up,” he said. “I couldn’t resist helping myself to a little appetizer.” “I guess that means you’re hungry, huh?” He quickly responded, “Baby, I’m starving!” “Me too but I’m not in the mood to cook.” Sam didn’t mince words when he said, “That might be a problem Ron.” I laughed as I told him there was an IHOP at Greenbriar mall and asked if he had time to grab some breakfast before his flight. “That’s a good idea but we need to take a shower first; you’re a little crusty from showing me how happy you were to see me!” “You’re one to talk!” I said pointing at the flakey residue on his stomach. “Let’s finish this in the shower.” “Fine by me,” he responded with a wink.

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What’s in in it for me? I enjoyed the show as Sam climbed out of bed and did a few stretching moves to wake his muscles and pop the kinks out of his back. “Get your ass up!” he snapped heading to the bathroom. He was testing the hot water when I walked in. The first thing I noticed was that beautiful booty bent over the tub. “Feel free to make yourself at home,” I joked. He glanced at me and asked, “Can’t you see I’ve already done that?” I mumbled, “That’s not all I see.” He turned to me with his monster wagging in my direction and asked, “You wanna say that loud enough for me to hear?” I blankly said, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” “Mm hmm!” he grunted sarcastically. “Get your ass in the shower!” I said with a smack to his beefy butt. “Yes sir!” he replied before kissing me. I watched my stallion step into the steamy spray before I turned to get towels. The lusty sight clearly had an effect on me as my manhood sprang to life. I was greeted with a sultry kiss when I joined him in the shower but this time it was more passionate as the hot water sealed our lips. After the kiss, Sam soaped my back allowing the excess suds to drain into the crack of my ass. “Now doesn’t that feel good?” he asked softly. I had to admit it did. Sam knelt in front of me and swallowed my muscle; the combination of his warm mouth and the hot water was driving me wild. “Damn, that feels so good!” I sighed.

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Christopher Beckwith He stopped for a second and asked, “Like that, huh?” I immediately responded, “Hell yeah!” I wanted to taste Sam but I was afraid I would detonate before I could return the favor. I motioned for him to stand up then flicked his nipples with the tip of my tongue before trailing down to his stomach. The view was complimented by his groans bouncing off of the tiled walls; it was intoxicating. Sam interrupted my snack as he said, “I wanna see you skeet baby.” I didn’t have a problem accommodating the request and was quick to stand up and wrap my arm around his waist. The expression of sweet agony on his face fueled my lust as we pumped our soap-slick sticks. “Oh shit baby!” he roared. I raced to catch up hoping we would reach our climax together. The bathroom was filled with lusty groans once our rhythm was in sync. It only took a few more strokes for us to cross the finish line. It was hard not to laugh as we watched our spunk wash down the drain. “Well, I guess we can go eat now,” I gasped. He chuckled, “You still need to wash that rusty ass!”

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SixtySixty-eight Three’s a crowd

he bubbly hostess greeted us with over the top hospitality; it was as if we were the only customers to walk through the door in days. Her smile was as bright as a sunny day and her attitude confirmed she loved her job. “Welcome to IHOP!” she said. “Table for two?” Matching her enthusiasm, I responded, “Yes ma’am!” “Okay, just a minute. It’s been so busy this morning I’m not sure I have a clean table.” “Take your time,” I said as she scampered off. Sam looked over the menu while we waited. Staring off in the distance, I was stunned to see Aven headed our way. “What’s up Ron?” he said with an eager grin that faded once he noticed Sam. “Hey Aven, I’m surprised to see you.” Guarded, he said, “I’m surprised to see you too!” Sam looked up from the menu when I introduced Aven as an officer investigating the murder. “Nice meeting you,” he said reaching out for a shake. Struggling with his frustration, Aven returned the shake and replied, “Same here.” He tried to ease the tension by changing the subject. “I thought we were making progress in locating Bruce but all of our leads have pretty much dried up. We checked

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Christopher Beckwith the address in his file but it was a dead end.” “He’ll show up sooner or later,” I said. “You know street hustlers don’t stray far from their bread and butter.” Aven replied, “And when he does, I’ll be right there to take him down!” “I can’t wait to see the look on his face when you haul him away!” “That makes two of us!” Aven said. He was clearly ready to distance himself from the awkward moment so I told him to let me know if there were any new developments in the case. He simply responded, “I sure will Ron.” Just as Aven was about to walk out the door, he looked back to tell Sam it was nice meeting him. Sam cautiously replied, “Same here man.” I could feel Sam staring at me as the door closed. He casually asked, “So, what’s his story?” I was hoping not to sound defensive when I said, “I told you he’s one of the officers investigating Randy’s murder.” “Ron, if you haven’t noticed, he’s got a thing for you.” Without thinking, I asked, “What makes you say that?” “Well, he seemed a little irritated when you introduced him as just an officer investigating the murder.” I figured it was best to be honest so I said, “I don’t want there to be any secrets between us Sam.” “Ron, are you trying to tell me something?” “Yeah, I guess I am. Aven came on to me but I shut him down; I told him everything about you.” “Everything?” “Maybe not everything but I did tell him things are good between us and I wanted to keep them that way. I thought

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What’s in in it for me? he understood.” “Tell me the truth Ron, are you attracted to Aven?” “To be honest Sam, I’m not. I mean he’s sexy but goodlooking guys don’t turn my head, especially in this city; they come and go.” I was relieved when I saw the hostess headed our way. She eagerly said, “Gentlemen, your table is ready!” “Now you’re talking!” Sam replied with an expression that confirmed he was ready to eat. The hostess led us to a vacant booth. “Enjoy your meal!” she said before heading back to her station. Sam continued to stare at the menu. It was clear that he wanted to believe me about Aven but he wasn’t convinced. I wanted him to know he didn’t have anything to worry about so I said, “I’m not interested in Aven; I’ve found what I was looking for and I’m not about to screw that up!” He put the menu down and said, “I believe you Ron but we live so far apart and it’s obvious that Aven is interested in you. I noticed it the second he walked up.” “You can trust me on this one Mr. Hamilton.” “Okay Ron, that’s exactly what I’m gonna do. I want you to trust me as much as I trust you. Can we eat now?”

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SixtySixty-nine nine Up, up and away!

tried to prolong the ride to the airport but I was exiting the freeway before I knew it. I was glad that Sam’s reservations were for a later flight because it gave us a chance to play around and grab some breakfast. Just as I was about to turn into the parking lot, he said, “You don’t have to park Ron, I’ll get out at curbside check-in so you can head to work.” “Are you sure?” I asked. In a reluctant tone, he answered, “Yeah, I don’t wanna make you any later than you already are.” I knew he wasn’t ready to leave as we sat there trying to drag out our last minutes together. At that point, I wished I had the power to stop time but he was right; I needed to get to work. “I wish I could stay longer but duty calls,” he said. Trying to lighten the mood, I teased, “I wouldn’t want Tom to come to Atlanta looking for you.” “If I know Tom, he’d spend most of his time chasing the ladies here in Atlanta.” “It’s all good as long as his money is right!” I joked. Laughing, Sam explained, “He’s not shy about peeling off a few bills for some head so that wouldn’t be a problem.” I almost gagged as I imagined Tom getting a blowjob.

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What’s in in it for me? “I’d better go before I miss my flight,” Sam said. I squeezed his hand as I responded, “You’re right, if you miss your flight I’ll have to take the day off and I don’t need to do that.” “Here’s something to think about while you’re at work,” he said then leaned over for one last kiss. I popped the trunk so he could get his duffle bag. When I got out, he and the bag were already waiting on the curb. “Let’s get this over with, I hate long goodbyes.” he said. I was instantly wrapped in a tender hug but the intimate moment ended as quickly as it began. “I’ll call you when I land,” he whispered. I simply responded, “I’ll be waiting.” He grabbed his bag and headed for the entrance turning back to shoot me a wink before stepping inside. I was happy and sad all at once; happy about Sam’s visit but sad that he couldn’t stay longer. As I watched him walk away, all I could think about was my next trip to Houston.

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Seventy eventy All in a day’s work

y thoughts shifted from Sam to the possibility of running into Bruce at the club. I was uneasy about going out because you never know what a fool will do if he’s backed into a corner. I only hoped things wouldn’t get out of hand before Aven could get there. When I walked into the reception area, I was shocked to see Devon working for a change. “Hey Ron, how was your trip?” she asked. “You know funerals; they’re a barrel of laughs!” “I’m sorry Ron; I guess that was a stupid question.” “That’s okay Devon; I actually had a nice time.” Relieved, she said it was good to have me back. “Yeah, yeah!” I teased heading toward my unit. I ran into Judy on the way to my cubicle. She hugged me and said, “Welcome back Ron!” “So how’s the Temple Trace project going?” “It’s going great! We’ve come up with several ideas that I know you’re gonna love.” “That’s good to hear, I knew I could count on you guys.” When we walked in, she announced, “Look who’s here!” Steve was the first to welcome me back reaching out for a fist bump as he said, “What’s up man?” He was forced to make room for Rita when she cut in to

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What’s in in it for me? ask how the funeral was. ‘At least she’s direct,’ I thought. “There was a brass band and the crowd danced around like it was a Creole festival,” I said. “I’ve never seen anything like it!” Her face lit up as she said, “That’s exactly how I wanna go out, with a bang!” “Be careful what you ask for,” Steve warned. “Someone might take you out with a bang!” She snapped, “Whatever Steve!” “It was a lively funeral,” I said in an attempt to ease the tension. “I’m just glad I got to see it first hand.” Messy as usual, Rita asked, “Was there any drama?” I thought about the old fart on Miss Hattie’s porch and figured that wasn’t dramatic enough for her so I responded, “Unfortunately for you Rita, there wasn’t.” Appearing out of thin air, Mr. Pendleton asked, “What’s all the commotion over here?” A smile replaced his scowl as he said, “I’m kidding Ron; Devon told me you were back. So are you holdin’ up okay?” I told him I was doing good and thanked him for asking. “That’s good Ron; we’re glad to have you back!” “I was thinking you’d be back today so I made muffins,” Millie said. “They’re in the break room.” “And they’re delicious too!” Mark added. “I made a point not to go in there,” Rita said. “You know a girl can’t resist good food!” Steve was about to comment when she raised her hand and told him not to go there. Practically dragging me to the break room, Rita took two muffins from the platter and handed one to me. After the first a bite, she moaned, “These are really good;

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Christopher Beckwith Millie you should bring muffins every morning!” “And give Ron a reason to stop bringing Krispy Kreme donuts, yeah right!” Rita quickly responded, “Girl, when you put it like that; never mind!” My first bite drove my taste buds wild and the second was even better. I rushed to swallow then asked Millie if she made the muffins from scratch. She casually responded, “Yeah Ron, I scratched my butt the whole time I was making them!” “Aw hell naw!” Rita shrieked. “That’s just nasty!” “Girl, you know I’m kidding; I gotta eat ‘em too!” I quickly let them know I didn’t have a problem with it. “I don’t care what she scratched, these muffins are bangin’!” “I guess I’ll have one now that we know the crust on top didn’t come from Millie’s butt!” Steve joked. The break room cleared as we went back to our cubicles. I was in no hurry to jump into my work so I took a little time to enjoy the serenity of the peaceful moment. I felt my phone buzzing and hoped it was Sam. I looked at the display and sure enough, it was. I answered, “Hey Mister!” “Hey yourself,” he said. “I guess you’re back on your home turf, huh?” “Yep, we just landed; I’m headed to my truck now.” “So, how was your flight?” “Smooth as silk,” he replied. “We were landing before I knew it; I didn’t even finish my soda.” “That’s the best kind of flight; quick and easy!” Then Sam asked how it felt to be back at work. “I felt like a star when I walked in. Everyone was happy

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What’s in in it for me? to see me and one of my co-workers even made muffins.” “It sounds like you work with a nice group of people.” “Sam, you wouldn’t believe how kind they’ve been. It’s good to know people care about you.” Then he asked how Steve was doing. “You know Steve, crazy as ever. I have to admit he held things together while I was gone.” “Yeah, that’s Steve; make sure to tell him I said hello.” I noticed Steve walking in my direction and said, “He’s headed this way so you can tell him yourself.” Steve peeked into my cubicle and said, “Ron, get off the phone! Mr. Pendleton wants to meet with the team so we can bring you up to speed on the Temple Trace project.” I handed Steve my cell and told him somebody wanted to holla at him first. His guarded expression softened once he realized Sam was on the phone. “What’s up Uncle Sam?” he greeted with a chuckle. I was tickled that he was still hanging onto that. After a short pause, he said, “I’m doing good man, just trying to get Ron back on track.” It was ironic that the trip brought Sam into my life not to mention my newfound friendship with Steve. I figured Sam asked about Lena when Steve said, “Yeah, we talked this morning; that’s my little hot tamale!” It was hard not to smile thinking how cool it was that we made such good friends in Houston. “We gotta get to a meeting,” Steve said. “I’ll talk to you later man.” He handed me the phone and said he’d see me in a few before heading to the conference room. “Steve was right Sam, I gotta to go.”

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Christopher Beckwith “I just wanna say one last thing before we hang up.” “I know Sam, I love you too!” “That’s not what I meant; we already covered that.” His sober tone grabbed my attention so I replied, “Okay, I’m listening.” “Ron, I know you’re going to the club to look for Bruce. I don’t want you to confront him but I know this is something you have to do. Just be careful baby; be more than careful. I don’t know what I’d do if anything happened to you.” Sam’s words hit home because anything could happen. Bruce had already killed Randy so I knew he wouldn’t think twice about doing the same to me. “To be honest Sam, I am a little nervous.” “Just make sure you let Aven do his job; he’s trained to handle a situation like this.” His mood turned playful as he joked, “After this is over, make sure you tell Aven that I said thanks for taking care of ‘my’ baby.”

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What’s in in it for me?

SeventySeventy-one Taking a chance

couldn’t help thinking about the night ahead as I headed home. The Cock Pit wasn’t one of my favorite places; I only went with Randy because he liked it so much. But this time I had to go, I had to see for myself if Bruce had the nerve to show his face in public. The voice of reason said he wouldn’t come out so soon after the murder but my gut told me he just might be that stupid. I wasn’t surprised when my cell rang because it always seems to cry out for attention while I’m driving. Relieved to see Richard’s name on the display, I answered, “Hey Richard, what’s up?” “Hey Ron, I’m just checking to make sure you and Erica made it back.” “Yeah, we made it,” I said. “I’m glad it’s a short drive.” He was quick to respond, “Don’t I know it!” Richard was caught off guard when I told him the best thing was the surprise waiting when I got home. “Well, don’t keep me waiting!” “There was a visitor camped out at my door. He didn’t think I should be alone so he flew up from Houston.” “Bitch, you gotta give me more than that; he sounds like a stalker!” “It’s no big deal,” I replied. “He’s just an acquaintance.”

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Christopher Beckwith “Acquaintance my ass; save that shit for your mama!” “Okay, he’s more than that—a lot more!” “Sounds like you got a good one!” Richard said. “Baby, you’re preaching to the choir!” “So when do I get to meet this perfect man?” “I don’t know Richard; you know what they say about the vamps in Atlanta!” “And who are you calling a vamp, bitch!” “Well, I had two words in mind but I thought tramp was a little harsh; I was trying to clean it up!” “Okay trick, you got in for that one!” he joked. When he asked if I was going to the club, I said, “Hell yeah, I wanna see if that asshole has the nerve to show up!” “Good, I’m at Bryan’s now and he’s definitely in.” I told him I was headed home to get changed and then I’d swing by so we could have a drink before the club. “Cool, give us a call when you’re on your way.” I felt better after talking to Richard. I knew it was a good idea to have them tag along because they’d have my back if it came to that.

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SeventySeventy-two two Here’s to Randy!

was relieved that Richard was already at Bryan’s place. With my mind racing about what could happen at the club, swinging by to get him was one less thing I had to think about. That would give us time to get our nerve up and map out our strategy. I wasted no time getting out of my car and climbing the stairs. I was surprised when Bryan opened the door before I could knock. “Hey Ron, come on in!” he said. “How did you know I was here?” Laughing, he replied, “These walls are so thin I can hear my neighbors fart!” Richard was on the sofa nursing what was left of a cocktail and said, “Ron, I hope you don’t mind us getting started without you.” “It’s all good as long as there’s more!” I joked. “I made Apple Martinis,” Bryan said. “You want one?” “Baby, you already know!” Richard pulled out a perfectly rolled blunt as I sat next to him. “We smoked one already so I told Bryan I’d match it when you got here,” he said. I was tempted but I decided to pass. I told him I wanted to keep a clear head in case we ran into that bastard.

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Christopher Beckwith “Suit yourself, I wanna make sure I’m good and tore up when we whip his sorry ass!” Bryan came back with a Martini shaker and a glass. He filled my glass and topped theirs off then raised his to toast our friend. “To Randy, the craziest bitch I’ve ever known,” he said. “I miss you with all my heart.” “You can say that again!” Richard added. We tapped our glasses then threw back a big one for our good friend. Richard lit the blunt and took a hit before passing it to Bryan. He sighed, “You know, it’s really strange not having Randy here.” “You’re right,” Bryan agreed. “Randy was always ready for pre-game festivities before going out.” I’m not much of a smoker but the aroma was on point. After another sip, I said, “Fuck it; pass me that shit!”

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SeventySeventy-three The beginning of the end

idnight motioned for us to come to the front of the line when we walked in. That was a relief since I was already battling my nerves and didn’t want to spend a lot of time waiting to get inside. “I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am about Randy,” he said. “He was a good dude.” “Thanks Midnight,” I replied. “That really means a lot!” Instead of frisking us, he said, “Y’all are cool, go on in.” I laughed thinking that the one time I could have gotten a weapon in the club with no problem, I didn’t have one. We thanked him then headed over to see Miss Stella. “Well, if it ain’t my favorite customers!” she said. “I’m so sorry about Randy; it’s just terrible!” “If you think that was terrible, wait ‘til I see the bastard that killed him!” Her expression went from compassion to shock as she asked, “So you know who did it?” “Yeah, but I don’t wanna get into it right now. Just know there might be some drama here tonight!” “There won’t be much drama with Midnight here,” she joked. “That’s what we pay him for!” I glanced over as Midnight flipped me a peace sign even though I knew he didn’t know what we were talking about.

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Christopher Beckwith She waved us by the counter and said, “The cover is on me so get on in there and have a good time!” “Thank you sweetie!” I said as we headed inside. The strip show hadn’t started so we had a clear view of the club. I was relieved that I didn’t see Bruce; I wanted him to pay for what he did to Randy but I wasn’t sure if I was up to confronting him. I relaxed a little when Bryan suggested we get drinks. My fading buzz needed a boost so I responded, “Works for me!” We followed him as he wedged past the crowd at the bar then waved to get Mike’s attention. After stuffing a few bills in the tip jar, Mike made his way over to take our order. “I’m sorry about Randy,” he said. “I can’t believe it!” I tried not to sound grim as I said, “We don’t have much choice after the funeral yesterday!” “Let’s not dwell on it; what are y’all drinking?” “I’ll have a Jack and Coke,” I said resuming my search. I felt silly thinking Bruce would show up. I wanted him to pay for the pain he had caused by killing Randy but I was sure he wouldn’t risk coming out so soon. I realized our search for Bruce was probably a waste of time so I leaned against the bar as I waited for my drink. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw him coming out of the restroom. I was overwhelmed by a surge of anger as Bruce made his way through the crowd like he didn’t have a care. I tapped Richard on the shoulder as I tried to stay calm. When I pointed Bruce out, he pounded his fist on the bar and shouted, “Oh shit!” “Bitch, what’s wrong with you?” Bryan snapped. Richard shot back, “Look over your shoulder and you’ll

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What’s in in it for me? see what I’m talking about!” Doing a double-take, Bryan said, “I can’t believe that ass had the nerve to show his face in here!” Richard stammered, “Ron…hurry and c-c-call Aven!” Pulling out my cell, I replied, “I’m way ahead of you!” I nervously located his number and hit the call button. My hands were shaking so bad I could hardly get the phone to my ear. Only seconds had passed but it seemed to take forever for the call to connect. On the third ring, I finally heard, “What’s up Ron?” “I’m at the club and I just saw Bruce!” I shouted hoping he could hear me over the music. “Okay Ron, calm down,” he said. “Which club?” With my eyes locked on Bruce, I yelled, “The Cock Pit!” I jumped when Richard screamed, “Tell Aven to get his ass over here now!” I was struggling to hear over the music not to mention his ranting so I shouted, “Hold on a minute, I can’t hear!” “I’m on my way,” Aven said. “Don’t let him out of your sight and don’t do anything until I get there!” “Okay, but you better hurry; that’s a promise I might not be able to keep!” I wondered what we would do if Bruce saw us before Aven got there. It was a good thing Mike had finished our drinks because I really needed one. Bryan handed me the drink and said, “Here Ron, it looks like you could use this!” I emptied the cup in a few gulps as I continued to watch Bruce talking to a guy in the corner. Bryan anxiously asked, “So what did Aven say?” My head swooned as I replied, “He wants us to keep an

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Christopher Beckwith eye on Bruce until he gets here.” “We can’t let him walk around like he’s innocent!” “I know Bryan but we can’t tip him off either!” Richard angrily huffed, “What are we supposed to do?” “Aven said to make sure Bruce doesn’t try to leave. He’s on his way so we have to keep our cool until he gets here.” Bruce poured on the charm for his target. It was hard to believe how captivated the guy was; he was all over Bruce. I looked at my watch wondering what was taking Aven so long then realized only a few minutes had passed. Richard nudged me and said, “He’s coming this way!” Bruce was headed toward us flanked by his little trophy piece. He didn’t see me which gave me a chance to man up. I was nervous about confronting him but Richard and Bryan were more than ready to step up. Bryan noticed my anxiety and said, “Let him start some shit and it’s on!” Bruce stopped in his tracks when he saw me. He nodded then led his friend to the end of the bar where he continued to run game on him to let me know he was unaffected by my presence. I was so pissed that I ignored Aven’s warning and walked over to Bruce and his prey. Before I could say anything, he greeted me casually with an infuriating, “What’s up yo!” “I don’t believe you have the nerve to speak to me like we’re cool or something!” I shouted. “My best friend is in his grave and I know it was you who put him there!” “Man, I don’t know what the fuck you talking ‘bout but you better get outta my face with that bullshit before you get your ass whupped!” He headed off motioning for his friend to follow. I was

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What’s in in it for me? so pissed that I grabbed his arm to prevent him from leaving. Bruce jerked away then threw a left cross that landed on my nose in an explosion of pain. I couldn’t believe he’d actually hit me until I felt a drop of blood hesitate at the top of my lip before trickling down the side of my mouth. The voice of patience pleaded with me to stay calm instead of following my instincts to return the punch. I wanted to hit Bruce so bad that my knuckles itched but I knew my next move would not only have to be a good one, it had to be a smart one. I grabbed my nose as I staggered toward the bar hoping to look like a defenseless victim. “Nigga what!” Bruce shouted. “Your punk ass is fucking with the wrong one son!” I thought, ‘Is that the best you can do, call me a punk?’ I reached for a barstool to steady myself. I couldn’t let my body language divulge my plan so I continued my display of helplessness. Once I had a grip on a barstool, I raised it in the air and brought it crashing down on Bruce’s head. The blow was so forceful that the barstool slammed against the bar. I couldn’t tell which one hit the floor first, Bruce or the barstool. The crowd suddenly went silent as a rush of adrenaline dwarfed the pain that occupied my nose. Out of nowhere, a roar of laughter filled the air. Watching Bruce on the floor in agony was vindicating. I had taken him on and whupped his ass; it felt good as hell! I barked, “Who’s the punk now bitch!” Bryan came over and put his arm around my shoulder. He was laughing so hard that tears flooded his face. He breathlessly asked, “Ron, are you okay?”

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Christopher Beckwith There was no controlling my laughter as I said, “I’m fine now that this asshole is gonna pay for what he did!” I was quickly surrounded by people congratulating me for taking on the giant that so many feared. All of a sudden, I noticed Midnight and Aven charging through the crowd followed by two other officers. As the officers grabbed Bruce, Midnight asked, “Are you okay Ron?” “Yeah, I’m fine,” I sighed. Aven pulled me aside and asked, “Are you sure Ron?” I laughed a hearty laugh as I answered, “Of course I am, can’t you see I just whupped that ass!” He tried not to laugh as he asked, “Didn’t I tell you not to do anything until I got here?” “Yeah, but a thug like me ain’t never scared!” At that point, Aven couldn’t help but laugh. One of the officers had Bruce gripped in a headlock as his partner clamped a pair of handcuffs on him. “I’m gonna kill your faggot ass!” Bruce screamed as the officers dragged him to the door. “Let me make sure they can handle this fool!” Aven said before rushing after the officers. I was determined to see them haul away the trash they had in custody so I followed them. Bryan was on my heels as we met Richard at the admissions counter. Miss Stella shrieked, “Oh my God Ron, you were right; I didn’t expect this to go down tonight!” “I’m not surprised,” I said. “My gut told me that asshole would be here!” When we stepped outside, the officers were trying to restrain Bruce as Aven called for backup.

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What’s in in it for me? “We have the suspect in the Richard’s murder case in custody!” Aven shouted into his police radio. All of a sudden, Bruce dropped to one knee in a twisting motion and broke free. He jumped to his feet and sprinted across the street dodging the oncoming traffic. One of the officers quickly drew his pistol and ordered Bruce to stop but he just looked back with a smirk as he continued to run. In an instant, he was plowed down by a MARTA bus. The tires screeched as the bus thumped wildly. Aven ran into the street as the other officer waved frantically to get the cars to stop. His pace slowed once he saw Bruce’s crumpled body under the bus. I had a clear view of the chaos but I needed confirmation that this nightmare was over. I waded through the sea of cars to assure myself that Bruce was really dead. I felt vindicated as I looked at the horrific sight and was glad that I witnessed Bruce get exactly what he deserved. There was a slight smile pulling at Aven’s lips as he put his arm around me. “Ron, I didn’t see that coming but I’d be lying if I said I’m not glad.” One of the officers called out to get Aven’s attention. He motioned that he’d be there in a second then told me it wasn’t a good idea for me to be there. “Do me a favor and wait with Richard and Bryan; I’ll be over in a minute.” After another look, I made my way back to the sidewalk. Richard said, “Now that’s what you call karma!” “That fucka got just what he deserved!” Bryan added. Suddenly, there was the faint sound of sirens in the distance. As they grew louder, I noticed an ambulance and two police cars barreling toward the club. The block was instantly transformed into a media circus

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Christopher Beckwith with a barrage of vans from every major television network closing in to get a stab at the developing story. The amazing part was it was all because of my vigilante efforts. One of the onlookers came over and said, “Excuse me, I’m David.” “I’m Ron and this is Richard and Bryan,” I responded. “I heard about your friend’s murder and wanted to say how sorry I am.” I thanked him and said, “It’s good to know people care about what happened to Randy. “I was cheering louder than anybody when you knocked the shit out of that fool!” he joked. “I’m just glad he got what was coming to him.” “So you’ve had problems with Bruce too?” “No, but he almost beat my friend to death last year. The police said their hands were tied because we couldn’t prove he did it. It’s about time somebody had the balls to stand up to that ass!” Richard growled, “I told y’all he was a no good snake!” “You didn’t have to tell me,” I said. “I could smell it all over him!” “A rat is still a rat no matter how good he looks!” David added. “I’m just glad he finally got his!” That got a laugh out of me and the guys. It felt so good to laugh now that this drama was over. “Are you going back inside?” David asked. I told him I was sure the police would have questions for me so it depended on what happened next. He said, “I was gonna buy you a drink; you deserve it!” I thanked him and told him that I’d take him up on it if I decided to come back in.

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What’s in in it for me? It was hard to believe everything unfolded so quickly as we watched the paramedics huddle around Bruce’s body. Richard pulled a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and said, “I need a smoke!” Bryan asked for one adding, “A girl’s nerves are shot!” I hadn’t smoked in years but I needed something to help calm my nerves so I asked for one too. I laughed at Richard’s expression as he handed me the pack then asked, “So now you’re smoking cigarettes too?” “I’ve done a lot of things this week that I haven’t done in a while!” I was instantly comforted by the cigarette; I’d forgotten how relaxing they could be. “I wish I could see the look on Miss Hattie’s face when you tell her what happened,” Richard said. It was late so I hadn’t thought about calling her but I had to tell her the good news. I reached for my phone as I said, “Let’s call her now.” After a couple of rings, Michelle answered with a weak, “Hello.” “Michelle, it’s Ron. I know it’s late but it’s important; do you mind waking your parents?” Sounding more alert, she asked, “What’s this about?” I shouted, “We got the bastard that killed Randy!” “Ron, are you telling me the police caught him?” The nightmare of Randy’s death had taken its toll on all of us so I was glad to be the one to tell her it was over. I eagerly answered, “Yes baby, they got his ass!” It was hard not to laugh when she squealed, “Thank you Jesus!” Then she asked, “So how did they catch him?” “Michelle, he had the nerve to show up at the club!”

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Christopher Beckwith “Damn, that nigga’s got some balls!” “Not anymore!” I joked. “Okay Ron, I’m really lost now.” I told her I came to the club looking for Bruce. “I wasn’t sure if he would show up but sure enough he did.” “Are you still at the club?” she asked. “Yeah, I’m with Richard and Bryan; you won’t believe how it all went down.” “Well, don’t keep me waiting!” she shrieked. “I didn’t see him at first but when I spotted him coming out of the restroom, I called Aven to tell him he was here at the club.” She anxiously asked, “Okay, then what happened?” I tossed the cigarette to the ground as I explained that I confronted Bruce to keep him occupied until the police could get to the club. “When they arrived, two of the officers tried to arrest him and…” “What do you mean they tried to arrest him,” she cut in. “Did they get him or not?” I told her he tried to escape but he got run over by a bus when he ran into the street. “It nearly tore his ass apart!” “What!” she shouted. “Yes baby, that muthafucka is dead, do you hear me?” “Mama is gonna be so happy; let me go get her.” Within seconds, she was knocking on her parent’s door. “Mama, Ron’s on the phone with good news!” When she didn’t get a response, she stressed, “Hurry up mama; it’s real good news!” Moments later, I heard Miss Hattie’s groggy voice. “Ron, what’s so important that you had to wake me up?” “I saw that bastard at the club tonight!” I shouted.

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What’s in in it for me? Still dazed, she asked, “What bastard?” “The bastard that killed Randy!” “You mean he had the nerve to show his face in public?” “Yes, but I’m sure he’d regret it if he could,” I teased. She was clearly puzzled as she asked what I meant. “I started a fight with him to keep him distracted until Aven could get here. They tried to arrest him and...” “What do you mean they tried to arrest him?” “The police had him in custody but he broke free so...” “Ron, he didn’t get away did he?” “Not even close; he got flattened by a bus—I saw it all!” When Big John asked what I was saying, she said, “The bastard that killed Randy is dead!” “What!” he roared. “Yeah John, that fool got hit by a bus; Ron was standing right there when it happened!” Big John immediately shouted, “Hallelujah!” I heard her crying and told her I hoped they were tears of joy. “Yes Lord, I’m so happy I can’t help but cry!” The crowd drifted inside as the ambulance pulled away. Aven was headed toward us with one of the officers so I said, “Miss Hattie, Aven is headed this way so I’m sure he’ll have questions for us.” When she asked who I was talking about, I told her that I was with Richard and Bryan. “Tell them I said hello; and make sure to tell Aven that I really appreciate all of his hard work.” I told her I would and promised to call her later. As I slid my phone into my pocket, Aven introduced the officer as Detective Willis.

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Christopher Beckwith I shook his hand and introduced Richard and Bryan. Richard told Detective Willis that they were with Randy the night he was killed and that they saw him leave the club with Bruce.” “I’m sorry about your friend,” Detective Willis said. Bryan responded, “I’m just glad this mess is over!” Detective Willis told us he needed to get our statements to complete the investigation. “Not a problem, I’ll be happy to help in any way I can,” I said and Richard and Bryan also agreed to cooperate. “I’ll need you and your friends to come to the station so we can get a clear idea of what happened tonight. I’m sure it won’t take long.” Aven said, “Mark, they can ride with me.” “Good, I’ll see y’all shortly,” Detective Willis said before heading off to meet the other officers. I told Aven we came to the club in my car so we would have to meet him at the police station. “Why don’t you let Richard or Bryan drive your car; you can ride with me and they can follow us there.” “Look at you,” I said. “You never stop do you?” He lustfully replied, “That depends on how rested I am when I get started!”

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