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NEWS
J
ust like Arnie, we are back, albeit lacking the Governator’s impressive pecs and knack for classic, if basic one-liners (“GET DOOUUWWWN!!”). Much has passed since we last went to press: A Tory/Lib Dem coalition has swept to power, unleashing a swift plan to solve Britain’s financial problems by pulling funding from across the board (a move that looks particularly significant for students) like a parent refusing to help the kids out of cash troubles because “they need to learn the value of money”; BP managed to unleash five million barrels of oil into the Gulf of Mexico causing untold damage to the Gulf ’s ecosystem and local fishing industry (not to mention the death of 11 workers in the initial blast); last (and probably least) of all, our collective confusion over whether the Vuvuzela was an assault on our ears or a particularly poorly designed football didn’t stop us wearily looking on as England’s football team demonstrated their longstanding commitment to mediocrity by making fools of themselves (and those of us that tipped them for glory) once more at the air-horn/air-ballcrippled World Cup in South Africa in a showing that Wayne Rooney had probably not realised would become only his second-worst headlining moment of recent months. Locally, Cornwall’s mass appeal became obvious as tourists and locals alike were treated to weeks of uninterrupted sun, ruined only by the thick wall of heavy, grey cloud it was too often hidden behind; CUC incorporated Dartington College of Arts (a warm welcome from Flex to you all); as a result of record UCAS applications and the fact that Falmouth and Penryn might actually be too
small for a rapidly expanding campus such as Tremough, many students did and still do find themselves struggling to find accommodation; also, stepping out of uni life and into something entirely different, the town gained unwanted national coverage in a Telegraph story bearing the headline “Transvestite Had Sex With a Dog at English Heritage Castle”. The damage to Pendennis Castle’s renown as an exercise spot for local canines was understandably huge. Luckily, as English Heritage assured us, “this was a very rare incident” and the town’s hounds slowly re-emerged (still quivering) from behind their newly vigilant owners ready to enjoy a fresh start at the historic site. It’s been an eventful summer for Flex as well, with departing Chief Editor Asher Simpson taking on a proper job after a sterling first year running this, one of the country’s only independent student newspapers. This left much work for newly anointed Chief Editors Seren Adams, Ian Pogonowski and myself to get done over the summer months. It was hard work, but we emerge, ink-stained, tired and relieved with this, the new look Flex, featuring a team of contributors who have all worked incredibly hard to get the first issue of the academic year ready for you. We hope you enjoy reading. Be sure to let us know what you think is good, what you think doesn’t work and most importantly of all what you can contribute to make future issues even better. Flex is your student paper, produced not only for but also by the students of Tremough and Woodlane. There is every reason to get involved - so have a read and drop us a line. Paul Tucker
Flex Staff Managing Director / Chief Editor Ian Pogonowski- imp202@exeter.ac.uk Chief Editors Seren Adams - sa118778@falmouth.ac.uk Paul Tucker - pt249@exeter.ac.uk Graphic Designer Ben Satchell - hello@bensatchell.co.uk Photographer V. Gopi Mohan News - news@flexnews.co.uk Ben Perks - News Editor - bp118906@falmouth.ac.uk Connor O Brien - News Editor - co118723@falmouth.ac.uk
Arts - arts@flexnews.co.uk Josie Ainscough - Arts Editor - ja119101@falmouth.ac.uk
Sports - sports@flexnews.co.uk Chris Rushton - Sports Editor - cr267@exeter.ac.uk
Reviews - reviews@flexnews.co.uk Dora Eisele - Reviews Editor - de224@exeter.ac.uk Alex Raffle - Reviews Editor - alex.raffle1@gmail.com Emma Thompson -Reviews Editor - et246@exeter.ac.uk
Proofing Team Anna Grant Casey Kathryn Hosking Dominique le Grange Anna Kilcooley Emma Chafer
Features - features@flexnews.co.uk Mark Burton - Features Editor - mb349@exeter.ac.uk Sarah Stevenson - Features Editor - SS121826@falmouth.ac.uk Lifestyle - lifestyle@flexnews.co.uk Hannah Banks Walker - Lifestyle Editor - hb264@exeter.ac.uk
COUNCILLORS REFUSE STUDENT LETS
Text Connor O’Brien
Councillors have refused to grant permission for three family homes to be made into student lets in Falmouth town. A Falmouth Town Council meeting on Monday 7th June decided: “Enough was enough”, and that too many family homes were being transformed into student dwellings, “ripping the heart out of the community”. The Combined Universities of Cornwall was described in the meeting as a victim of its own success, and that it needs to do more to house the rising student population, especially with next term’s arrival of students from Dartington College of Arts. Councillor Alan Jewell said: “It’s just another case of a house being lost to the students. It’s just another nail in the coffin for Falmouth. Enough is enough, it’s getting ridiculous.” “The university has to accept they have got to do more to accommodate students. Why should we be pushed out?” An important factor is that students are exempt from council tax, which means local services are being put under strain because family homes are being rented to students. Sharon Sharp, assistant manager of Waterman’s Bar, described the situation as awkward. “It should have been thought out better for the size of what they are aiming to do, and even the parking alone was an issue from the start. “It’s a shame that all students are tarred with the same brush, but the university should have more responsibility; a bit more could have been done on both sides,” she said. With more and more homes becoming student houses there is always the factor of noise, and students becoming a nuisance to neighbours which has, at times, forced families to move out of Falmouth. However, many feel that if good relationships are built, and respect is shown on both sides then issues can be dealt with accordingly; incorporating the students into the community and building better relationships.
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Jilly Easterby, university spokesperson, said: “University College Falmouth and the University of Exeter are committed to engaging positively with the wider community. “The institutions continue to work closely with Cornwall Council, Falmouth and Penryn Town Councils, and private sector developers to identify suitable sites for off-campus residential accommodation so as to provide a higher standard of accommodation for their students and minimise the impact of their growth local housing stock.” Private sector accommodation like The View flats, located on New Street in Falmouth, supply new and sufficient housing for students whilst having little impact on the town and its community. Samuel Evans, a resident at The View and 3D Design student, said: “The student population brings a lot of money; if council services are being stretched then they should maybe charge landlords. “(The) private sector should think more about transforming disused spaces around town, like The View, which isn’t taking housing away from the locals but making use of flats that were derelict.” While students are exempt from council tax, they do help the local economy a great deal, using local shops, bars and restaurants throughout the year, especially vital when the tourist season draws to an end. Still local businesses struggle in the winter months, even with the influx of students. Simon Van-Evelingen has lived in Falmouth his whole life and as the owner of Sessions surf shop said: “It may affect housing but from a business owner’s point of view, students are my customers. From a house-owner’s view, students don’t pay council tax, which perhaps means that I would have to pay more on my own council tax. I think the people who own these properties should make sure the council tax is paid.”
Marketing Kaylie Finn - kf228@exeter.ac.uk Elizabeth Williams - ew118629@falmouth.ac.uk
news@flexnews.co.uk
NEW PERFORMANCE CENTRE PREPARES TO OPEN
Text Connor O’Brien
A new performance centre, located on Tremough campus has been built as part of the UCF merger with Dartington College of Arts. The centre, due to open next month, will facilitate the new music, theatre, and dance students that are relocating from the Dartington Campus in Devon. The world-class facilities cost in the region of twenty million pounds, fifteen of which were provided by The European Union’s Regional Development Fund. With a further three million pounds coming from the South West Regional Development Agency, the remaining investment funding came from the Higher Education Funding Council for England’s Strategic Development Fund. “The performance centre offers ex-
ceptional facilities, purpose built for students’ specific needs with the very latest equipment. The performance centre will attract interest locally, regionally, nationally and internationally as a centre of expertise and innovation”, said Larry Lynch, Director of Art & Performance. Students will have access to two large theatre performance studios, one with seating and other with fully sprung harlequin floor. Performance studios for both acoustic and amplified music, as well as three studio theatres, a music recording studio, music practice rooms, and a further two large dance studios; all fitted with contemporary production lighting and sound facilities. The local community will also benefit from this state of the art facility
from a programme of public performances that will be taking place over the coming years. The studios will also be made accessible to students from other courses, “The Performance Centre will complement the existing facilities at Falmouth, providing opportunities for students from all courses to broaden their work into performance environments,” said the University College’s Head of Sound and Vision. “It will encourage collaborations between the Schools to create exciting new performa nce, installation and exhibition projects.” For more information visit: www.falmouth.ac.uk Campuses & Facilities.
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NEWS
TCS CAMPUS COMPLAINTS Text Ben Perks
Many students have expressed their opinions about living on Tremough campus last year, including numerous complaints about the Internet service, the post system and the handling of complaints by campus porters. “I live in the older blocks and the shower had rusted off the wall when I arrived, it was hanging on by literally a thread of metal. The porters also say that the noise ban is after 11pm but they come knocking way earlier than that.” Said previous Tremough resident, Ollie Karl Ball. Glasney View has only been lived in since the beginning of the last academic year, and Tremough Campus Services used to only allow first year and mature students to live on campus. This has now changed because
of the new development. However, this has sparked complaints from students who have lived on campus for two years. “Living on campus has gone up by ten pounds a week compared to when I lived here last year, and we have less services – we used to have a cleaner for our rooms, now we don’t but pay more.” Said Law student, Ravi Pilaipakam-Thatai. The way the post is handled on campus has also made students anxious about receiving anything important through the mail. “The new post system gives everyone in my flat access to the same postbox with everyone’s post, through a key which freely hangs in the kitchen for anyone to grab. Let’s just say I’m very happy I don’t need to get credit cards
posted here or anything like that.” Said student, Hendrik Hildre. Campus services Director, Lucy Black, stated that everything is being done to address tenant’s problems. “We have been working closely with the FXU during the year to try to ensure that services are providing what students want, and this will continue. We recognise there have been issues with internet provision at Glasney, particularly during the first term, following which students received a partial refund from IT Services. We have reviewed this service for next year and are currently negotiating for an extra supply of bandwidth, to increase speed. We expect this to be in place by September. “We brought in a new system to deal with post earlier this year, which we
shall review at the end of this academic year. The Royal Mail provides the postal service, and TCS supply mailboxes for them to deliver to. As such we do not see them as less secure than any other shared accommodation. However, whenever students have particularly valuable items they are advised to send them by recorded delivery - these can be collected at Glasney Lodge.” Said Lucy. Hip Hop Society president and law student, Ali Khan, is annoyed at the breach of privacy about living on campus. “I have had porters walk into my room before, which particularly annoyed me and it’s a breach of article 8 of the European Convention of Human Rights, which relates to a right to private life.” He said.
SWIM IN FALMOUTH Text Connor O’Brien
A campaign has been launched to get a new swimming pool in the Falmouth and Penryn area through social networking website Facebook. Local resident Matthew Stone has created the campaign to get a lanes pool built in the area which is already home to Ships & Castles fun-pool. There are also a handful of hotels within the Falmouth area with swimming pools. “These pools cannot accommodate the amount of people that we take to Truro every Saturday, and neither have lanes. Secondly, they are not 25 metres in length”, said Matthew Stone who runs a Surf Life Saving Club based at Gyllyngvase Beach, Falmouth. “Surf Life Saving and many other sports, including competitive swimming, need at least a 25 metre pool to produce the athletes other towns in Cornwall do,” added Mr Stone who runs the campaign alongside enthusiastic local swimmer Steve Rhodes. The group was started when Mr Stone had issues finding a suit-
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able place for his club to swim in winter as the children being taught were unable to brave the freezing conditions. “Unfortunately, there were no adequate places within a 10 miles radius to accommodate almost 100 children, as we need at least a 25m pool to train in. Therefore the club had to travel with at least 30 carloads of members to Truro School pool every Saturday evening”, said Matthew. The campaign currently has 1,500 members, with an aim to reach 2,000 so a petition can be created to put forward to the council. Matthew concluded, “The area has the third largest population in Cornwall, yet our residents have to travel in the region of ten miles to find somewhere adequate to swim. A decent 25/50 metre lane pool is something that Falmouth and Penryn should have had a long time ago. If you want to swim in Falmouth, join the campaign”. To show your support search: Swim In Falmouth on Facebook, or follow it on Twitter: @SwimInFalmouth
Not all students living on Tremough have complained, and many were happy with their experience of living on campus, enjoying being so close to fellow students and the library services on campus. Student journalist, Charlotte Wood, expressed concerns about the fining system operated by TCS. “I got fined £40 whilst living at Tremough because of a number of stains on the carpet. Admittedly yes we were throwing food around, so fair enough. We were told either to clean the stain ourselves or they would need money towards an industrial cleaner. We couldn’t actually shift the mark so we had to pay the fine. When I took a visit back to my old flat, the stain was still very much there.” Said the journalist.
news@flexnews.co.uk
NEW TECHNOLOGY ALLOWS STUDENTS TO SIT TESTS AT HOME Text Ben Perks
Scientists have found a way for students to take tests from their home at any time of day or night. The University of Wales Institute, Cardiff, is experimenting with the technology, which has built in anti-cheating software, and dozens of other institutions will be offered the service this summer. It has been developed by the US firm Software Secure Inc and works through a unit that students plug into their computers. The technology takes a fingerprint to check the student’s identity, and a 360-degree web-cam and microphone pick up whether the student is trying to cheat. The computer also “locks down” so that the student cannot search the Internet or their files for answers. University invigilators can then watch the footage whenever they choose to, to ensure that there’s no cheating. New York University’s law faculty, the University of West Alabama and other US institutions already use the technology, called Securexam Remote Proctor. It will be offered to universities later this month at an international plagiarism conference hosted by Northumbria University. The University of Wales Institute, Cardiff is already looking into using the technology for its overseas students. Mark Pelling, the senior learning development officer at the university, said he had been impressed. “This could change the way we do assessment, “We think it is probably a very effective way of invigilating. However, there were still some questions over whether a student would be able to thwart the system and how it would be possible,
logistically, to send thousands of students the unit. “With record numbers of students at university, institutions struggle to find an exam hall big enough to fit every candidate. The technology would solve this problem and save on the cost of hiring invigilators,” Said Pelling. Douglas Winneg, Software Secure’s founder, said the technology would help disabled students and those who live in remote areas to take their exams and would make employers less skeptical about distance learning courses. Kate Byford, the senior policy adviser on disability at the Equality Challenge Unit, which helps universities to cater for all students, said she welcomed practical measures to develop alternative approaches to assessment. “Offering a range of assessment methods ensures that more students get the opportunity to perform at their best. By anticipating students’ needs and implementing different and flexible assessment methods, institutions are actively demonstrating their commitment to inclusion for all students.” Said Byford. Aaron Porter, president-elect of the National Union of Students, said: “It could be one solution for those who might have difficulty reaching a university campus for their exams, such as disabled students or long-distance learners”, but he warned against using it as an excuse to further cut costs by reducing the amount of contact time students have with staff. “No technology is completely infallible and it is crucial to ensure the fairness and integrity of assessment is maintained for all students.” Said Porter.
UNIVERSITY COLLEGE FALMOUTH ASCENDS 21 PLACES IN THIS YEAR’S GUARDIAN UNIVERSITY GUIDE Text Connor O’Brien
University College Falmouth has flown up the rankings of the Guardian’s University Guide by 21 places this year, achieving 40th position out of a total of 118 higher education institutions in the UK. The Guide provides vital information for more than 600,000 university applicants who face the toughest ever competition for places this year. It ranks universities according to how satisfied their final-year students are, how much each institu-
tion spends per student, the ratio of staff to students, the career prospects of graduates and the grades that prospective students are required to achieve in order to have the chance of being offered a place. “The Guardian University Guide is particularly important because it is the only survey that is heavily weighted towards student satisfaction,” said UCF’s Rector and Chief Executive, Professor Anne Carlisle. “University College Falmouth
achieved excellent results in last year’s National Student Satisfaction survey and this is reflected in our performance in this year’s Guide. To have risen by 21 places is testament to the quality and breadth of UCF’s specialist offer in Art, Design, Media and Performance, and our unyielding determination to prepare graduates for success in the creative industries as we progress towards the attainment of Arts University Cornwall by 2013.” Said Anne.
In the past, UCF has appeared in the Guardian’s list of specialist institutions offering fewer than four subject areas, but now it ranks among the best universities in the country as a result of merging with Dartington College of Arts and the addition of Performance courses at the university. UCF not only outperformed its competitors in the overall university rankings, but also achieved significant success in the Guide’s subject specific tables for Art & Design,
Dance, Drama & Cinematics and Media Studies & Communications, in which the University College ranked 14th, 41st and 42nd respectively. UCF’s companion at Tremough Campus, the University of Exeter was ranked 14th in the same league table.
Said Harry Wade, first year Journalism student. A number of flats have been leased to UCF from The View apartments in Falmouth Town, this comes as another step to accommodate the rise
in students seeking university digs. Give us your views and opinions on the bunk bed situation by emailing news@flexnews.co.uk or follow us on Twitter: @FLEXstudentnews
FRESHER’S BUNKING UP Text Connor O’Brien
UCF students moving into Glasney Parc accommodation are being made to share rooms due to overcrowding. Two hundred of the six hundred UCF single rooms have been turned into twin rooms with the installation of bunk beds to accommodate the unprecedented amount of students this year seeking university accommodation. There has been an increase in students applying for places at UCF, this is due to the government giving additional places for students within the creative industries because of their importance to the economy.
The twin rooms as well as having bunk beds installed have also been fitted with additional storage and work areas to accommodate two students, who will be charged £66 instead of the £110 for a standard single room. As well as this they will also receive free internet. The shared rooms were allocated in order of when applications were submitted, however students were informed to apply as early as possible. This situation has occurred in past years although it was a temporary procedure, however this year it is thought that many students will
be in shared rooms for the whole year. Students were informed in the accommodation brochure that there are a small number of bunk bedded rooms for when they are oversubscribed, but many of the four hundred students now in those rooms were shocked when they received the call. “I phoned numerous times about paying my deposit and I was told not to worry and wait. Then suddenly I got the call that I would have to share a room, I think it’s a joke because I applied as early as possible”.
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FEATURES
IS TREMOUGH OVERCAPACITY? Text Sarah Stevenson Sarah Louise Stevenson discusses the tribulations associated with an oversubscribed campus, and the affect it will have on students’ academic and personal lives. In August the National Student Survey found that 82% of British university students were satisfied with their undergraduate course. While only 76% of University College Falmouth students were satisfied with their first year, an impressively high 90% of Exeter students were happy, rating ninth in the list of UK universities, mirroring their high academic achievement which is also placed at this level. Overall Tremough Campus students are just above the national average in terms of academic satisfaction, rating 83%. However this acceptable statistic may not be reflected in the amount of students, especially 2010’s freshers, satisfied by Tremough’s accommodation situation. As Dartington School of Arts makes it long-awaited move to the Tremough Campus, a record number of first year students are expected to arrive at the seaside campus. An estimated 400 students are expected to have to share bunkbedded rooms, an emergency measure put in place by Tremough Campus Services. Scores of new students are finding themselves without suitable housing, or any housing at all, and student letterboxes in Falmouth are flooded with daily flyers, pleading for spare rooms. “I often get flyers through the door begging for a spare room,” says one student currently living in Falmouth. “They say things like: “Friendly Film student looking for digs. Am able to move in on short notice.” “I think its disgraceful that those awarded an academic place at any of the institutions should have to beg, borrow or steal to live here. People are effectively homeless.” With no rooms available in Falmouth, many students are being forced to search for accommodation in Truro, Redruth or Cambourne, having to make a daily 20 mile round trip. In addition to basic housing needs, Tremough Campus will also be pushed for space at The Stannary’s late night events during the infamous Freshers fortnight, and, of course, many other times of the year. The Stannary’s 1250 capacity is due to be swamped by the 2000 Freshers arriving come September. An estimated 750 students will be turned away from Freshers’ events every night, with a maximum of 800 who have pre-paid £30 for Freshers bands getting priority. These shocking statistics support recent calls for enlargement on a vast scale at the campus. Many have accused the combined universities of “running before they can walk” by welcoming new courses to fit a profile which cannot be supported by the current facilities. Many blame UCF, who have admitted to oversubscribing many of their courses, for the inundation of students, triggering irresolvable disruption which TCS are now being forced to settle. Tremough’s Library and Learning Resource Centre has recently undergone huge refurbishment in order to make room for Dartington’s existing stock. However with the centre remaining the same size, it would be impossible to assume that all the resources needed for Tremough’s course list could be accommodated. While the ability to study much needed reading material falters, how can one expect for students to be satisfied with their undergraduate courses? However with the myriad of students in attendance, Tremough Campus becomes a richer fabric of cultural diversity every year. As the FXU gains power and support, events are becoming more frequent and more exciting. Tremough Library’s countless stock offers a wide reading base for both academic and personal needs. And while physical facilities remain unchanged, resources grow in the number of people willing to contribute to all elements of academic, professional and creative work.
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features@flexnews.co.uk
SEX, DRUGS AND SUDOKU Text Aimee Burnham “Sudoku, it’s the nearest thing I get to a long slow orgasm.” This was said to me one day, by a customer, as I was working behind the bar in my local town. Needless to say, I was doing the daily Sudoku out of boredom. However, on reflection, what he said was true. I could list the activities on one hand that could absorb me in such a way: sex, shopping, reading, puzzles and music. None of these are high octane pastimes, in fact I sound like my Grandmother. It got me thinking about what it means to be a twenty something in 2010... We are constantly told about the pensions deficit that we will have to pay for, that the age of retirement is set to rise, and that we will never be able to get onto the property ladder. Where has the fun gone? I watch Mad Men and imagine the chilled out mellow of the sixties. I listen to Pink Floyd and imagine psychedelic seventies festivals. I envy the kids of the electric eighties and the young and beautiful of the ravefuelled nineties. I sound like I’m yearning for the past, but when struck with the mediocrity
of the present it’s difficult to be excited about the future. Modern fashion is repetitive; what my mother was wearing in her twenties I can wear now and look a la mode. Movies seem to be a continuous line of tired remakes. Mainstream music is uninspiring, and takes this lack of inspiration from some of the weakest tracks of the past. The questions I want to ask are: when did we want to become our parents? Why are we embracing the 70s and 80s and making sweet, sweet love to it? What should we do differently? Legalise prostitution and narcotics for one. That would definitely get us in the history books. Embrace underground music and globalisation in order to get some new inspiration for our fashion, music and identity. In essence we should continue to binge drink and make lots of noise. We must be bold enough to try something new if we want to make our mark on the world. It’s Freshers’ this week. To those who have just arrived smoke, drink, shag who you want. Make new friends and new enemies and have a laugh. You only live once, live it to the full but it’s OK to like Sudoku.
CAUGHT IN A DUTIFUL DOGMA Text Claire Shaw
In order for something to be accepted as true, does there need to be evidence? The denial of scientific evidence by religious believers is one that deeply concerns scientists. In his new series: Age of Reason, Richard Dawkins explores the controversial issues that arise when confronting creationists on their refusal to accept evolution. What Dawkins reveals about the way evolution is taught in schools, or not taught at all in some cases, is extremely disconcerting. In faith schools, RE lessons are monitored not by Ofsted, but by an independent inspector of the same faith. This allows free rein on how to teach the curriculum for the subject. As one in three state schools within the UK are religious, should this not be a reason for concern? Many of our young children are being provided with an education system that is fundamentally biased, and could therefore have potentially detrimental effects on young and impressionable minds.
The rising flood of evidence that supports evolution, collected ever since Darwin made his famous discovery during the mid-nineteenth century on which he produced his famous work: On the Origin of Species, has helped us understand the natural world around us. Reputable and educated clergy and bishops, including the Archbishop of Canterbury and the current Pope, have accepted evolution. Despite this, figures from an Ipsos MORI poll among British people suggests 39% of British people favour some form of creationism. If the theory of evolution has been backed up by copious amounts of evidence in order for it to be respected as ‘fact’, where do creationists stand? Their only evidence is an ancient scripture written thousands of years ago by various scholars. Is faith alone enough to override factual scientific evidence? If faith schools deny their pupils an unbiased education, children will
learn to be satisfied with whatever answer they have been told is true, reducing their ability to think rationally. A progressive nation of logical thinkers should be encouraging young minds to use their innate curiosity to question different theories and beliefs. Shouldn’t children’s impressionable minds be taught according to a national curriculum instead of indoctrination? In order for this to happen, religious education lessons would have to be monitored more strictly by Ofsted, instead of having their own independent inspector, ultimately ensuring an unbiased way of teaching. The ancient scriptures of many religions have led to traditions which are still followed today. Religion works on its followers’ faith and belief in the scripture, so the more people believe in scripture, the easier it is for them to accept that what they believe must be true. Could this, in turn, act as a form of
evidence? If millions of people believe strongly in Christianity, for example, then must there be some truth in the Bible? Certainly, in the impressionable mind of a child, it becomes easier to believe when surrounded by believers. Dawkins describes children as ‘natural creationists’, as they in particular are innately drawn to purpose driven explanations of natural phenomena, making them “fertile grounds for fairytales and creation stories”. In-
stead of promoting dogma, shouldn’t children’s natural curiosity and appetite for knowledge be encouraged by balanced teachings of multiple theories, through evidence, rational thinking and observations? It is important to approach the world with an open mind, and be able to do this from a young age during the most important years of learning. No child should be indoctrinated into believing in any specific theory or belief, but should have the opportunity to think rationally and logically, weighing up all the evidence to make up their own mind. Perhaps the influence of religion is too strong at such a young time in a child’s development and is not giving children the right to a free mind? Children should be freed from the epidemic of irrational and superstitious thinking and be allowed to explore the many religious, historical and scientific teachings without such bias blurring their vision.
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REASONS TO BE FEARFUL Text Michael Hawkes
In November America will hold its midterm Congressional elections and Barack Obama’s Democratic Party will face its first true electoral battle since 2008’s victory. Optimistic Republicans are expecting a substantial swing reminiscent of the 1994 midterms, when Republicans took control of both houses of Congress during Clinton’s Democratic Presidency. The Republicans’ pre-election campaign includes their ideas of the Things Americans Should Fear, including socialism, Obama, Muslims and illegal immigrants. You may wonder why that list does not include terrorists but the sad reality is that, from the perspective of many in the Republican Party, it does: Muslims. This summer American conservatives have launched a campaign of hatred against Muslim-Americans, the flashpoint of which was the planned Islamic community centre, Park51. Park51 is an already approved Islamic community centre to be built near the site of the World Trade Centre. It will contain a host of inter-faith facilities including a swimming pool, a gym, a restaurant, a library, child-care services, a 9/11 memorial, and, problematically for many Americans, a separate prayer space for Muslims. The centre’s purpose is to break down barriers between faith communities, serve as an Islamic academic and cultural outreach, and a shrine to those lost on 9/11. Daisy Khan, director of the American Society for Muslim Advancement, the organisation behind the community centre, explains: “We want to create a platform by which the voices of the mainstream and silent majority of Muslims will be amplified. “A centre of this scale and magnitude will do that. The centre will be dedicated to what it means to be Muslim
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but what it also means to be American”. The head of the community centre is Imam Feisal Abdul Rauf, author of several books on how Islam can function as an integrated part of Western society. He is also the founder of two non-profit organisations that task themselves with improving relations between the Muslim world and the West. Rauf is a poster boy for inter-faith harmony and religious moderation, having been sent on bridge-building tours by the US State Department under both G.W. Bush and Obama. He has also worked with the FBI to facilitate better communication between Muslim-American communities and law enforcement. Rauf states: “Islamic extremism for the majority of Muslims is an oxymoron”, a sentiment that Khan echoes: “There is a new interpretation that has crept in. One of intolerance and one of non-acceptance and this we have to push back.” The project is being funded primarily by Muslim-American communities, but it is also welcoming international funding. The developer Sharif El-Gamal has said the project will refuse money from “organisations that have un-American values”, citing the government of Iran and Hamas as examples. The centre is being built by a group of Sufi Muslims, a sect of Islam that is hated and has its mosques bombed by the Sunni al-Qa’ida. “The closeness to Ground Zero is a blow to the extremists”, says Khan. “We need to project a different message of Islam, one of love, tolerance and the kind of commonalities we have with other faith communities.” The “closeness” of the site to Ground Zero is roughly 300 metres, or two New York City blocks, but this prox-
imity is not unusual for an Islamic building. It is only 200 metres away from the Manhattan mosque that has stood for nearly 30 years, where Imam Rauf is currently based, and only 500 metres away from the al-Farah mosque that has also been there for nearly 30 years. This project has great potential to bring communities together and give a voice to mainstream Islam in America. Fox News, in an interview with Khan, originally described the project as commendable. So what happened? In July the Republicans voted down a bill in the House of Representatives that would have created federal funding for the healthcare of 9/11 firstresponders, calling it a massive new entitlement program. Republicans were taking some welldeserved flak for voting down the bill, and their 9/11 credentials were hitting rock bottom. Enter Park51. Right-wing blogger and Balkan genocide denier, Pamela Geller, highlighted the project on her blog, Atlas Shrugs, calling it an example of the ‘Islamisation’ of America, and a slap in the face to the victims of 9/11 (not acknowledging that 64 innocent Muslims died in the attacks). Republicans realised the American public had an appetite for something Muslim to hate and along with Fox News, far-right talk-radio and blogs they set to work. Fox News began running segments about the Ground Zero Mosque; on its purpose, the religious and political views of its management, the location and the funding. They had no evidence to produce against the project, only doubt. They played bizarre games of six degrees of separation and guilt by association, hinting at what might be by preying on their viewers’ prejudices.
In 1969, around the time doctors began presenting the evidence that smoking significantly increased your risk of cancer, a leaked memo sent within the Brown & Williamson Tobacco Corp detailed their plans to halt the public acceptance of the facts, “Doubt is our product since it is the best means of competing with the “body of fact” that exists in the mind of the general public. It is also the means of establishing a controversy”. This is how large organisations distort reality for the sake of politics; in the absence of evidence they sell doubt. Anti-government rallies began to have “No Ground Zero Mosque” signs next to the “Thank you Fox News for keeping us informed” signs. Republican Senators and Representatives began making appearances condemning the Ground Zero Mosque as an insult to America and the victims of 9/11. The entire nation’s dialogue had shifted: The purpose of the community centre became to spread Islamic extremism in the heart of America. The management became Islamic extremists. The funding became a network of terrorist groups responsible for 9/11 and governments hostile to America. The location became specifically chosen as a symbol of Muslim conquest on the same hallowed ground where the towers fell. One of the most egregious examples of a Fox News smear was the insinuation that the project is funded by terrorists, on the basis that Iman Rauf is involved with a supposed terrorist sympathiser. What they failed to mention was the man’s name, Prince Al-Waleed Bin Talal, who is also known for being the second largest shareholder of Fox News’ parent company News Corp. Soon protests struck Islamic centres
nationwide, including signs saying “No mosque for the God of terrorism at Ground Zero” left inside a vandalised mosque in California, and an arson attack on an Islamic centre in Tennessee. A cab driver was stabbed in the neck in New York City for identifying himself as a Muslim, and upstate a group of men were arrested for driving around a mosque, disrupting Ramadan services by honking their horn and firing a shotgun. A man wearing a turban in Seattle was attacked and told: “You’re not even American, you’re al-Qa’ida. Go back to your country” and a Florida church vowed to hold their ‘Burn the Qur’an’ day despite warnings from law officials. The uproar shows no signs of abating and it likely won’t until after the midterms. Given the recent prospect of News Corp buying out BSkyB, British observers should take note of the way in which far-right media and the Republican Party have worked together to manufacture this controversy. While 9/11 was a day that fundamentally and painfully changed the world for many Americans, that does not change the fact that the majority of opposition to Park51 is rooted in xenophobia. This opposition relies on accepting a distorted version of reality, peddled by Fox News and their political allies where Muslims are a nebulous yet homogenous Other who all bear some responsibility for Islamic terrorists. Western nations, Britain included, must learn to ignore such scapegoating if we are to ever crawl back from the precipice that terrorism and our own cavalier foreign policy has pushed us to.
features@flexnews.co.uk
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH
EVERYBODY’S GOT A BLOG, I DID IT WITHOUT ONE
Text Mark Burton
Text M/I/C
The upcoming government spending review is expected to announce a funding cut for higher education of at least 20%. Universities are already hitting the panic button, as this year’s clearing debacle has illustrated. It’s a hard truth that financial austerity is required across the board in the current economic climate. However, it strikes me that such a ruthless slash in funding will only wreak havoc upon an already frail system. The ones to really suffer as a result will be you and I. We already suffer. Most of us are paying upwards of £3000 a year for courses where we’re lucky to see more than 8 hours a week of actual tuition. Next time you’re in a dull lecture, try and work out how much it’s costing you per hour; you’ll pay much more attention when you realise you’ve paid fifty quid for it. Currently there are two main schools of thought as to how to fill the inevitable funding gap. The coalition are touting, in various guises, a graduate tax which will affect everybody with the temerity to want a degree, whilst universities are in favour of substantially raising the tuition fee on some or all courses. The graduate tax is fundamentally flawed. Whilst it does away with tuition fees (in theory), it would actually end up costing us more than current tuition fees if we were even moderately successful in later life. It makes a degree even more of a gamble than it already is; what is the point of having one if it means you immediately pay more tax than your colleague who never went to uni? If graduates were guaranteed a higher level of income than equivalent non-grads, it would be workable, but it would never be accepted so pound for pound those who wanted the best education lose out. It’s not so much a tax on graduates as a tax on ambition. Increasing tuition fees is also a dangerous move. Students, especially those from lower income families, are already becoming averse to university because of the cost. Higher tuition fees, coupled with the Institute of Financial Studies’ assertion that the current budget will, predictably, hit the poorest hardest, will surely drive talented students away from education. This seems like a suicidal masterstroke from Osborne and co. We are a nation whose biggest export is knowledge. Expertise, skills and academia are what we do best these days; it’s not like we have a manufacturing industry to fall back on, and I’ve not seen that much oil gushing from the ground recently.
Universities have to be subsidised, and heavily so. This is inevitable, but the long term contribution to the economy of highly educated graduates must far outweigh the initial cost to the taxpayer. Perhaps the most frustrating aspect is the lack of support we get from our own institutions. Vice chancellors recently held a conference, the main point of which was to discuss the looming financial meltdown. They bemoaned the situation, and were desperately looking for ways to balance the books. The main solution was, of course, to raise tuition fees. Significantly. The prestigious Russell Group of universities put forward a plan to effectively open up higher education to market forces; charge what they like as long as people pay it, making students ‘customers’ and education ‘a product’. Going down this road, the next step on would be to cold call prospective students, offer buy one get one free courses, give 10% off when you buy online. It would be laughable were it not so scary. It’s difficult, however, to stomach a big rise in the cost of courses when it transpires that vice chancellors take home, on average, around £220,000 a year. In fact, Falmouth and Exeter are well above average in this respect. Exeter’s Steve Smith boasted a basic pay packet of £295,000 in the 08-09 year. In the same year, Falmouth equivalent Alan Livingston took home a basic package of £204,000 as well as a one-off retirement payoff of £188,000. Vice chancellors do vital work. Institutions would struggle to run without them and their job must be unbelievably demanding, but it smacks just slightly of hypocrisy when our heads decry a lack of cash whilst banking eyewatering sums themselves. There are no easy solutions to this issue. What certainly needs to happen is for the government to accept that higher education will always cost a lot, and continue to support and subsidise the system. Universities need to stop the knee-jerk reaction of passing on extra costs to students. They must take a good look at their own infrastructure and do some serious cost-cutting. Most importantly, as students we must stand up and take action. I was always told that education is a right, not a privilege. Unless we resist these proposals en masse, unless we reject moves to turn education into a grand moneymaking scheme, into the exclusive domain of the wealthy, that adage may very quickly be proved false.
I remember when the Internet was good for two things: Pornography and Napster. Then came Myspace, and with it, a recreation capable of transforming the global population into a race of junked up morons; social networking was born. What had previously been confined to the inner circle of your local Games Workshop and enjoyed exclusively by freshly pubescent nerds with nowhere to stick it, was now available to all; a pseudonym. People were able to caricature themselves, hiding at will the shortcomings of their humdrum existence. Pedophiles the world over drew in an exacerbated breath of optimism. Hank, a 45-year-old HGV truck driver from Wichita Falls, Texas, became James; a 14-year-old 9th grader with a new found affinity for Yahoo chat and acronyms. Oh, how Hank LOL’d. It’s a testament to the Internet’s own fantastical nature that in July 2005, Myspace was bought for $580, 000, 000. An amount so hypothetical, it could have just as easily been reached by estimating the number of Hentai-fuelled erections ‘Tom’ had to contend with prior to it’s sale. The reality is that we as a statistic now represent the true value within the online market. Every man and his dog (literally) has a Facebook profile. You fabricate a gay marriage with a friend; you get bombarded with gay-centric advertisements accordingly. We have unknowingly become consenting prostitutes of information, and the Internet is our pimp. I remember as a child the significance of the nine o’ clock news - the haunting title sequence, Michael Buerk’s stupid Plasticine face. Even the news isn’t newsworthy any more. Kanye West’s Twitter account is the news. 2 young Brazilian females ingesting each other’s excrement and vomit is the news. A monkey doing a handstand on the back of a goat, stood on a red cup, positioned on a tight rope is the news. It’s completely out of control. There are videos of people watching videos. This is evidently entertaining enough to inspire another 12 million people to watch the watching. For anyone who believes in the 2012 Mayan prophecy: wake up, it already happened. So, what’s the point? The point is, where’s it going to stop? Are we all really destined to trade our physical existence for a virtual one in pursuit of eternal life? Are we all really destined to become Krang from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? I know where it stops for me. If I ever start my own Blog - shoot me. And I don’t mean shoot me in the American sense. I mean with actual bullets and an illegal firearm, preferably from close enough range to kill me.
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Welcome to FXU! Falmouth and Exeter Students’ Union
There is a whole team looking out for you. They have the power. They have the will. They have the technology.
They are… The FXU! Here for your Representation, Welfare, Support and Entertainment HI, I AM TIM! I’m the Welfare Prez If you have any problems, issues, concerns, or ideas then I am here to help. I can help you with anything from Finance, Housing, and Academic support, or just come in for a chat and a cuppa! Also if you want to get involved by being a student rep, activist, or doing events then get in touch.
Hi I’m Andy, I’m Falmouth Prez for this year, here’s a little bit about me :) Fav TV Show - The wire, Inbetweeners, Friends, Seinfeld and The Office. Fav Activity - Playing and watching football. Attitude to life - Enjoy and have a laugh. Fav music - Li’l bit of cheese always good. Aim as Prez! To make sure everyone has the best year at uni! Any problems, questions, or if you want a chat, give me a shout or pop into the FXU!
Hi I’m Kristy Wallace (aka Wally), I am the Exeter President. Here’s a little bit about me. Fav Activity: Anything to do with water. I LOVE THE BEACH!! Fav. Music: LIVE and acoustic! Fav Film: Finding Nemo and any form of natural disaster movie (with giant animals is better). Aim as president: To make sure you work hard, play hard and that your voice gets heard.
Clubs and Societies
Freshers!
FXU aims to offer a wide variety of sports and recreation activities according to student interest, as well as being able to put you in contact with community clubs and groups in the local area. There is a wide range of FXU clubs andsocieties which are open to all students! It’s a great way to meet like-minded people, try out new activities as well as gaining useful experience, which looks great on your CV. It’s a great way to combat the stresses and strains of studying.
We have something special lined up this Freshers! There will be smelly pirates, devilish demons, gleaming angels and fancy pancy party people in disguise. This is all wrapped with epic tunes and quality treats.
You can start your OWN Club or Society! If your favourite pastime or sport is not represented and you can get together a group of like-minded students (We suggest a minimum of 10-15) then we can help you start a new club. Since many activities are subsidised by FXU we aim to make even the more expensive activities as affordable as possible.
FXU Elections Would you like to be part of the FXU team? There are 7 officer roles to fill. FXU Officers are current students who are elected by students to represent you, campaign for you, organise activities, help students, make sure the student voice is heard and create the student experience you want! FXU Officers work with the Presidents and undertake the role on a part-time basis alongside their studies.
The available positions are: Campaigns Officer(Planning and organising campaigns in Have a look the interest of students) Badminton . Basketball . Bowling . Capoeira . Christian Community Action Officer(Planning and organising CA Union . Climbing . Conservatives . Contemporary Crafts events and volunteering) Events Soc . Cricket . Croquet . Dartington Soc . Debating Ents Officer (Entertainments)(Planning and delivering a Union . Eco Soc . Expedition Soc . Falmouth & Exeter range of events) Cornwall Campus Light Entertainment Society (FECCLES) Environment & Ethics Officer(To promote environmental Feminist Freethinkers Soc . Fx-pedition . Geog Soc . Hip and ethical good practice to students) Hop Soc . Horseriding.History . International Society Equal Opportunities Officer (To promote equality of Islamic Soc . CSM FC . Tremough FC . Ladies Hockey services for students) Men’s Hockey . Kayaking . Kung Fu . Netball . Labour Promotions Officer(To Promote FXU activities and events Soc Lyonesse Law . Music Soc (Orchestra) . Poetry Soc and develop design opportunities for students) . Politics . Radiowave . Renewable Energy &Sustainable RAG Officer (Raising And Giving)(Planning and delivering Society (RESS) . Rotaract . Men’s Rugby . Snowsports . fundraising events for charities) St John Links . FXU . Sailing . Sea Swimming . FXU Surf . Deadline for nominations is 12 noon on Monday 25th Swimming . Tang Soo Do . The English Society (TES) . October. Tremough Beer & Brewing Society . Tremough Follies . Tremough Singers . Ultimate Frisbee . FXU Wake . The Future of FXU - The decision is yours!
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FXU Advice Service FXU Advice Service offers free, confidential and impartial advice on almost any welfare queries, including... Money, Budgeting, Access to learning fund, Grants, Loans, Benefits, Tax credits, Childcare, Academic and Institutional issues, Landlord, Tenant rights, Legal advice and assistance, Employment issues and Student life! Uni can be hard, especially with money; - apart from the advice service, you can pick up our range of leaflets or check out the FXU website for useful info and advice. To make an appointment with a Student Adviser: Tremough Campus Ring: 01326 370447 Find us in the Annex (opposite the Refectory/Bar) Woodlane Campus Ring: 01326 213742 Find us in the Library Building Email: advice@fxu.org.uk
Something very important is happening this year that will need your vote. Around November time, there will be a student vote and an FXU Extraordinary Meeting to decide on how FXU is to be run due to changes in Charity Law that came into force this year. There will be 3 different models to vote on (all of which have been created on the basis of what is legal, what has worked well for other students’ unions and through lots of talking to students over this last year through diary-rooms, sound bytes, surveys and debating whilst eating lovely free food!) Now it is time to make the decision on which model you want and the choice is yours! Watch FXU space over the Autumn term for more details.
8th Ocotber
4th October
27th September
1st October 11
ARTS
A Master of Stories:
ILLUSTRATION
Recent graduate Ella Masters talks to us about her work and recent adventures. You studied fine art at Falmouth, though your paintings lean strongly towards illustration. Would you describe yourself as a fine artist or an illustrator? I’m still not sure which I am yet I often call myself an illustrator, because I often work with text, but I still act like a fine artist, sketchbooks filled with drawings of people and I still paint, but I see myself as an artist no matter what I am working with be it for a commission or personal work. What do you draw inspiration from? I’ve been well known to draw anything and everything but my main inspiration comes from people I see in the streets, mainly what they are wearing, because I’m nosey like that ha! Memories from my childhood often inspire me and books, mainly children’s, work from Roald Dahl, Shirley Hughes and Oliver Jeffers. I am really inspired by everything old. I have a large collection of teacups and old books. Who are your favourite artists/designers? Favourite artists/designers...I love the Pre-Raphaelites, Gustav Klimt, Boo & Belle, Beatrix Potter (the illustrators and writers above) Jamie Oliver inspires me, I’m not to sure why but it’s true, designers like Vivienne Westwood and anyone that’s a bit of a rebel. You write your own blog (www.ellamasters.com). Do you have any favourite blogs that you regularly visit for inspiration? I do have a few blogs that I look to for inspiration, Julia Pott and Gemma Correll are two favourites, but to be honest there are so many great blogs out there far too many to mention. My blog has been a fantastic way to promote my work and art I would really recommend other students getting one they are free so why not? What have you been up to since leaving uni? OOOh since leaving university I have been running my own small business online with my boyfriend called Ellabear and Joseph. I have also been working on a few commissions for the thread paper journal and a few blogs and websites. I am also working on a commission for the save Billingsgate fish market in London which is a fantastic mix of history and illustration. It’s been a bit strange having to learn the rope pretty much on my own about pricing and what not that illustrators have to know about but I have had interest from a few illustration agencies so fingers crossed i will find someone who will represent me. I have also being working on two children’s books one written by my mum :) and the other by me, and I have also been working hard on an illustrated recipe book, a mix of my two favourite things food and art. My dad has built me a studio in the back garden so I have been living and working in there doing 9hours a day to create some really dedicated work. I have been working on Ellabear and joseph christmas cards, illustrations for tea towels, shirts and prints for Christmas markets and the website. Ooh and I’ve been making my Zine tea for two. I think that’s about it. What are your plans for the future? Where would you like to be in ten years time? Plan for the future is next October to start my MA in illustration at Falmouth which I deferred due to an arm injury, give me and my arm a wee bit of rest, but eventually I want to have my own shop with my boyfriend who also just graduated from Falmouth doing spatial design, we want to run an art cafe, and vintage shop. I still really want to carry on being a freelance illustrator, and carry on writing and creating work for books. I would also love to be a children’s book illustrator. In 10 years time I want to be a well known illustrator with a shop and a big smile on my face. I mainly want to me happy and to be able to draw everyday... What advice would you give students going into their last year at Falmouth? There is so much I could say to now new 3rd years, appreciate where you are in the world. I moved back to London and god I miss Falmouth. Do lots of research for your dissertation and make sure you are writing it on something you are passionate about and also make good use of the extra help, if you are dyslexic, or finding it hard. Also just have a great time, do not stress about the work you are doing. I think I may have stressed a wee bit too much so learn from my stress and have a healthy mix of work and play. To see more of Ella’s lovely creations, visit:
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www.ellamasters.co.uk www.ellalalamasters.blogspot.com www.etsy.com/shop/ellamasters www.folksy.com/shops/EllabearandJoseph
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ARTS
Jemma Westing
ILLUSTRATION
As an illustrator and interactive book designer, I am motivated by polycentrism and believe that a book which emcompasses folded 3D matter has the potential to create a far greater spectacle and illusory experience for the reader than any other flat, 2D image. This belief has come from all my dissertation research and now informs my working practice.
THE HUMAN BODY This is a pop-up double-page spread design on the human body. Mechanical Harry and pull out features aims to inform a 9-12yr old audience about body systems and life processes and does this by introducing the brain and the central nervous system, the skeletal and muscular frameworks, and of course a listing of our vital organs-all of which when functioning in unison...keep us humans alive and well.
DO YOU REALLY KNOW WHAT A “BUG” IS? This illustration is of a spider and fly which would exist as part of another book concept titled “Do you really know what a bug is?”--This book aims to give an accurate definition of INSECTS whilst clarifying any confusion between insects, bugs and true bugs. This page would be part of the chapter on feeding-though a spider is an arachnid, this banded garden spider goes to lengths to spin a web which can potentially ensnare prey much larger then itself. Other moveable sidebar features which i am currently making would be the fight between an ant, and a ladybird over the aphid (10 points to anyone know why this might be!?), the flying honeybees and the woodlouse tunnel.
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arts@flexnews.co.uk
Matthew Fessey
PHOTOGRAPHY
Matthew Fessey’s images were taken in a Spanish village called Orihuela. These abandoned buildings can be found scattered across the village. In Spain there is a high unemployment rate. There was plans to reduce this by providing construction work to the unemployed. Consequently, there were too many buildings being built for the demand. As a result there is a surplus of these abandoned partly built buildings. Which could have potentially been luxury apartments as their design may suggest. Thus, Fessey’s images deals with the apathy through this abandoned space. The apathy is emphasized through the fact that the building serves no functional purpose anymore instead all that remains is traces of a memory.
ILLUSTRATION Callum Russell I like to keep my work playful and exciting. I try to approach each piece of work with an open mind, and let the project dictate how the final image will look, as opposed to approaching work with a preconceived idea of its outcome. For me illustration is a process. I let the words, themes and imagery of the text or subject matter grow and develop into a visual language. It is very important that the image I create compliments the text. I prefer to work as traditionally as possible, often using paper, images and textures that I source and create myself. I then scan these, and combine the separate elements digitally. This enables more flexibility when it comes to composition and experimentation. Recently I have started working on a series of stained glass window style pieces. These images often suit darker, more gothic subjects. These are stencils I cut into card, stick different coloured and textured paper behind, then photograph them on a lightbox, creating a unique glowing effect. I look to literature, film and people around me for inspiration. I mostly work with paper, so trawling around antique and charity shops looking for dusty old books and magazines is very useful
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ARTS
WRITING BROKEN BLINDS
MOMENTS
A soft white glow hits the cranium, a single beam of Light protrudes through closed eyelids, searching for A projection
It’s like trying to find your way home at night when all you’ve got is an empty road as your guide You’re cold and alone and far from your goal With more dark thoughts than you can control.
Rejection like a stomachs dry heave, the reflection Covers all and masks midnights lengthy silence with A blinding response Nonchalant in its quest for clarity, it bends and spreads Like a disease, until our eyes open and darkness is Swallowed whole Control our eyes from burning the sun and stripping It of its originality, grasping and clutching at its Beauty We neglect our duty to sleep and marvel at the Daylight spreading across the world like a Dyslexic’s crayon.
I
NY
THE GREATEST ESCAPE?
It was a feverish night, even the walls seemed to heave and sweat, trying to congregate by the juddering ceiling fan, which emitted the gentlest of breezes that didn’t even stir the curtains that lay frazzled by the heat of the open window; or the tuft of your hair which stuck up from the rest. Later I knew that you had been awake, unable to sleep with the sound of the gurgling fan, my tossing and turning, and the feeling of impending change.
Everyone knows where you’ve been No one cares where you’re going to next Without due attention, you’ll find yourself out west;
That day we thought we’d go over the bridge, do some shopping, get lunch. The heat kept us in Brooklyn, under a tree
Ignoring your intentions, you’ll never understand what it is to be a better man
in Marine Park. We lay there with wine, grapes and cheese and talked about getting out; moving to the sea. Find a house, get a boat, work from home, breathe again. I understood even then though, the comfort of a routine, even the need for one, and knew that I’d be the one leaving, I’d finished the wine before the bottle was even open. It could only end badly, after the beginning. I would leave with not so much as a goodbye, as I often did, even though this time, there was more at stake.
Chloe Luffman
You claimed yourself a lover A master of unwritten word But every little breathless sigh had to go unheard; When everything is crumbling and falling from your heart It’s probably time to stop calling it art And so the calling of the sea Carries you away Where you always hoped You’d end your days; Falling from the cliff face Books clutched in your palms Trying to find a place amongst the stars Lament not the broken soul A hollow body holds For each heavy step is a sleepwalking death As salty air accompanies somnambulant sighs The slave to the song sings to the night Endless ways to waste a day... Endless ways to waste away... And so the calling of the sea Carries you away Where you always hoped You’d end your days; Falling from the cliff face Books clutched in your palms Trying to find a place amongst the stars...
Tony Gale
16
But for that night, nothing changed. Restless, I lay festering on the couch, watching a documentary on the Beatles. Remembering nights like this in London, where we’d sit and watch the sunset by the Thames, camp or take walks in the suburbs, before retreating back to our narrow bed, as the sun rose, casting light on the late night revellers in Camden stumbling home. Long journeys and long periods of nothing, meant nothing. Back in London, I soon forgot the sex, the rows, the loneliness and even the pale sting of regret. I knew then as I know now, that we were a blueprint for everything else.
Jemma Green
It’s like trying to be alone in a crowd Raising your voice trying to drown them out So you can tell the one who calls you at night It’ll never work, it don’t feel right She cries and cries like never before And you know if God was keeping score this’d be a black mark on your soul Like all those times you lost control At the parties with all your old school friends Drinking so much you never saw the end Sometimes it’s all you can do to hold on when good intentions have all turned wrong The plans went awry, your dreams have all died; Hopes washed away in the rising tide But you wake, sun beating down, The taste of loss lingerin’ in your mouth And you’ve never felt.... So alive! It’s like being caught in the summer rain with it’s steady beat slowly driving you insane And as your shirt sticks to your skin You can’t help thinking of a time when You knew a girl with a heart so sweet She made every day complete; Remember the taste of her tender lips And the feel of her fingertips As she held you in the summer rain In a love you can’t live again. It’s like trying to find your way home at night When all you’ve got is an empty road as your guide You’re cold and alone and far from your goal With more dark thoughts than you can control...
Tony Gale
THE CAPE OF GOOD HOPE We’d wander round the Waterfront in Cape Town, the weather would be warm, but not hot. And we’d saunter along, holding hands for the first time in years. Your skin would be tanned, and your expression softened. My hair would be long and I would be much younger. We’d watch boats coming into moor, and fishermen hoisting heavy nets full of tuna onto the docks. For once we wouldn’t argue - there would be no uncomfortable silences. I’d be able to look you in the eye and smile at you, for the first time. We’d hire a car maybe, drive around, see the penguins at Boulders Beach, or search for baboons at The Cape of Good Hope and at night we’d sit out listening for the murderous call of tree dassies and watching the geckos on the wall. You would be more forgiving, and I would be less stubborn. I wouldn’t have moments of doubt as I watch you skimming stones, into the green water. But I can’t change what is done, so instead I’ve travelled alone, and now I’m sharing a bed with my cousin, listening to the sound of Christmas beetles ticking on the wall. Outside the crickets are clicking and spiders are weaving webs and I can see dragonflies around the putrid lake. On the beach the waves are shattering on the shore whilst cars keep on driving by.
Jemma Green
gylly beach c afé
on gyllyngva se beach • cli ff road • falm 01326 31288 outh 4 • www.gyll y beach.com 5mins walk fr om woodlan e campus!
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REVIEWS
FILM SCOTT PILGRIM VS. THE WORLD Text Harry Woodward If you like teenage romance, comedy, fight scenes, and rock music, this is the film for you. Director Edgar Wright seems to be adept at crafting films that could be deemed stereotypically suitable for whatever gender of audience. Both Shaun of the Dead (his first success) and Scott Pilgrim feature romantic relationships, but if there is any boy out there unable to deal with such content, they can enjoy the frequent lashings of violence. Not that Scott Pilgrim is as graphically violent as either Shaun of the Dead or Hot Fuzz, but it may boast a more complex plot. Scott Pilgrim (Michael Cera) is a typical teenage lad playing bass in rock band, the ‘Sex-a-bombs’, and dating his ‘fake high school’ girlfriend, the ever so sweet but not so sweetly named ‘Knives’ (Ellen Wong). Suddenly, his life is turned upside down when he witnesses in the school library, Ramona Flowers (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) the literal ‘girl of his dreams’ (literal since he dreamed about her). You think that’s surreal? When he ditches Knives and starts dating this new chameleonhaired babe, Scott realises she comes with a package: seven evil exes who want to beat Ramona’s new love interest to a pulp. Scott in turn has to defeat each ex in order to keep his new girl. But these are no ordinary fights. This is where the film takes
its comic book turn (after all, the film is based on a Japanese manga). Thanks to some dazzling special effects considerably more advanced since the Shaun of the Dead days, each battle consists of unbelievable light displays and superhuman fight moves. Yet rather than anyone being surprised by all this supernatural matter, it all seems to blend quirkily with the real world. Scott, seemingly a normal, shy little guy, seems to naturally discover his new combat skills. It’s as if the crazy world of manga has been draped over a familiar high school scene. Normally I’d avoid any film to do with either manga or American high school, but this movie really is an entertaining little gem. It’s cliché in places, but that’s balanced by some genuine sweetness and amusing innuendo. The fight scenes are out of this world, including a bass solo dual and an ex whose extraordinary power stems from being a vegan. The music isn’t bad either. Definitely a film for the section of today’s generation into manga and video games but there is mass appeal here too. Yes it could be argued that a bright young British talent has sold himself out to Hollywood, but if Mr. Wright can do that and keep producing little nuggets of gold like this, then I’m sold.
THE EXPENDABLES Text Tim Gooch I’d be lying if I said The Expendables was a subtle, complex, and brilliantly-scripted piece of film-making; but then I would also be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy it. For those of us who grew up with the sympathetic film heroes, the bloodied and dangerous but loveably human, the likes of Rocky Balboa, John Rambo, Detective McClane, and Sarah Connor, I can think of far worse ways to spend two hours and £7. The plot is essentially of no consequence, being merely a rehash of the tired and clichéd ‘CIA in a South American banana republic’ motif, featuring the standard truckloads of badly trained soldiers, tropical locations, bad guys in suits, carnage on a wholly unnecessary scale, and wise-cracking (and hugely muscular) heroes blowing everything to small pieces. Outnumbered as they often are, there is never a feeling of the surrounded underdogs, for the quintet of heroes always seems comfortably in control of the situation. Fortunately, however, The Expendables manages to avoid too much Bond and Bourneesque moral/political wrangling (although many of the fight scenes do leave that distinctive Matt Damon aftertaste), and instead contains some moments of traditional ‘don’t hit women and children’ moral righteousness that are rare in modern films, and gratifying when they are featured.
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Don’t look for strong characters in the film either, as the only genuinely believable part is played by Jason Stratham’s brooding mercenary, vaguely reminiscent of Clint Eastwood’s manwith-no-name. Perhaps in line with the simple moral stance, the good guys are good, and the bad guys are bad; star-studded it may be, but they are stars drawn on paper in two dimensions. There are no journeys of self-discovery here, besides a few predictable ‘gosh, doesn’t killing people for a living mess you up’ moments, and even Stallone doesn’t deliver his usual emotional intensity. Quite why Arnold Schwarzenegger even appears in the film is a mystery to me, and only serves to remind us what this film is: big guys with big guns making a lot of noise. I think, overall, that is what made the film enjoyable. Unlike the sequels to The Mummy or Pirates of the Caribbean, this film doesn’t take itself too seriously, and doesn’t pretend to be anything it’s not. My own star rating? Well, I’d only give it two out of five as a truly ‘good’ film, but do go and see it; the music is satisfyingly dramatic and the set pieces enormously loud and fiery. Don’t expect too much from this film, just revel in the spectacle and laugh at the gags. I’d class it as enjoyable nonsense and, when push comes to shove, I didn’t regret buying the ticket.
reviews@flexnews.co.uk
TV THE INBETWEENERS Text Ian Pogonowski Are you looking for something laugh-in-your-face silly? Look no further than The Inbetweeners. Girls, sex, cars, parties, and clubbing all on your mind? The Inbetweeners is a cracking E4 show following the lives of four sixth form college boys, as they attempt to work their way up the social rankings to become cool. Everything they do however, turns out quite the opposite. Will, a.k.a “Briefcase wanker”, is the protagonist. Having been transferred from a private school, to a comprehensive state school, not because he was bullied, Will settles in to his new life to the delight of the audience. From day one, the viewer sees Will’s perils as he attempts to fit in with the school, yet fails, quite miserably at his attempts. But, Will does make friends. With his three friends, the two series explore their adventures for a year, including skiving off school, insulting disabled people on the Nemesis Inferno, chasing the “Clunge Wagon” in a bright yellow Cinqichinto Hawaii, searching for a lady who likes tasting “Cornettos”, and much much more. It is safe to say, that The Inbetweeners is a comedy sitcom which stereotypes sixth form college life from the male perspective. Each friend represents a different type of person: The Intellectual, The Sex maniac, The Dumb, and The Aspiring Cool. Put this recipe to-
gether, and inevitably, disaster strikes. If you don’t mind watching a sitcom that is cringe-worthy in parts, because you realise that this is how you used to act in sixth form, then you’ll love The Inbetweeners. There is never a dull moment; you’ll always laugh, or cry at the sometimes shocking humour, smile at the parts which bring back your not-so-distant past, and get angry with yourself when you realise the fun you missed out on. Will’s skidding is not to be missed! There is one drawback to The Inbetweeners. The sex maniac Jay makes you cringe with his constant and degrading remarks about girls. He uses derogatory words for female genetalia far too many times, but is living up to his role as that kid in college who only had one thing on his brain... Overall, The Inbetweeners is a must see for all 18-25 year olds. It brings back your sixth form years with shocking clarity and you now appreciate (or soon will) how a University Degree has helped you change. Girls as well appreciate The Inbetweeners as they can laugh at the mishaps of boys being boys, usually trying to pull girls. Series 3 on E4 now: First Episode September 13th 2010 Series 3 comes out on DVD: 22nd November
THE X-FILES (1993-2002) Text Tim Gooch The X-Files is a cultural phenomena, in that most people have heard of it (and who doesn’t find that theme creepy?), but there are not many have actually watched more than a few episodes in their adolescence. An original mix of science-fiction and police drama, the makers of The X-Files have also woven in moments of brilliant comedy, horror, suspense, and plenty of believable and endearing characters. Intended as only a single season show of no great note, it became a massive cult hit, and eventually ran for nine seasons with an enormous international following. The basic premise of the show is this; Fox Mulder (David Duchovny) is an Oxford-educated FBI agent who investigates ‘X-Files’, cases deemed unsolvable by the FBI. His crusade for the truth is fuelled by memories of his sister’s abduction when he was twelve. He is determined to uncover the conspiracy of silence he believes to exist around the presence of extra-terrestrial life. Agent Dana Scully (a scintillating Gillian Anderson) is a brilliant medical doctor with a firm belief in the power of science to explain and understand the world. She is initially assigned to the X-Files project to debunk Mulder’s work and bring him into disrepute, but instead becomes convinced of his cause, and their relationship is surely one of the best on TV. Aside from a will-they-won’t-they romantic plotline, each character is incredibly well drawn, and their problems and struggles,
even against the backdrop of the paranormal, are heartbreaking in their tangible plausibility. The show is also enormous fun; over the course of nine years, Mulder and Scully battle with every conceivable weird and wonderful phenomenon; genetic mutants, time travel, clones, psychics, demons, alternate dimensions, vampires, artificial intelligence, sea monsters, shape-shifting aliens, ghosts, prehistoric diseases, all manner of bizarre religious cults, alien insects and zombies, to name but a few. Approximately a quarter of the episodes are concerned with the central conspiracy plot, but the rest are stand alone episodes that can be watched without any prior knowledge, although it is better to watch them in sequence if at all possible. The show also features the most excruciating cliff-hanger series finales, but fortunately the seasons are available for between £6 and £12 online, so you won’t have to wait too long to know what happens. My star rating for the show is undoubtedly five out of five. Superb acting, brilliant writing and ingenious plots combine to make a truly great show. It might take some patience, as each season contains between nineteen and twenty-five forty minute episodes, but three years as an undergraduate is a perfect time to better acquaint yourself with Fox Mulder and Dana Scully. However, a warning is necessary; The X-Files can be addictive; you have been warned. Remember, the truth is out there...
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REVIEWS
MUSIC AVENGED SEVENFOLD NIGHTMARE Text Dani Birtles Many Avenged fans thought that with the death of drummer Jimmy “The Rev” Sullivan, the band would stop there. However, they seem to have come back all the stronger for their loss, eager to prove that they can carry on and keep Jimmy’s dream alive and their newest album; Nightmare, is doing just that. Released on the 27th July the album is heavily influenced by bands such as Metallica and Dream Theater, the latter of which is due to Mike Portnoy appearing on the album in place of The Rev, which seems to have kicked Avenged’s rhythm up a notch musically. These influences have clearly made a good impression on the band, which in my opinion is their best yet. With heavier guitar riffs, more complex drum rhythms; due to Mike Portnoy’s fantastic talent and M Shadows’ vocals reaching amazing pitches, this album just seems to work. However, this is nothing like Avenged Sevenfold of the past. The lyrics seem to have deeper meanings. Completely different to the likes of Bat Country; inspired by the film Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. With the deep and mind-felt lyrics like: “tonight we all die young”; obviously a reference to Jimmy’s death, the music is just perfect on every beat.
The guitar riffs are like nothing ever heard from Avenged. Faster, louder, tuned lower but with more energy than ever before. Something which Zacky Vengeance has admitted to never being able to do before. But I’m sure without any doubt that Jimmy would be proud if he could see what has been achieved. However, Jimmy’s death is hard to ignore with the album, not surprisingly. After 11 years friendship, something like this just doesn’t go away. Predominant pictures of the band without Jimmy take up the album sleeve, and the skeletons that make up the artwork also have a huge pull towards Jimmy’s death, the most notable of which is an image of Jimmy himself, half skeleton, half human. Heart-wrenching stuff for any Avenged fan. After topping the US Billboard charts and hitting #5 in the UK Album Charts, it’s clear to see that although Avenged Sevenfold have felt loss, the tragedy has brought them together stronger than ever and with this new album, there of course will going to be a tour, which kicks off in England on the 26th October in Glasgow.
MARK KNOPFLER GET LUCKY Text Tim Gooch In an age of easily forgettable hits, shallow sexual lyrics and mostly unremarkable musical ability, Mark Knopfler is something of a breath of fresh air. You’ll know the name; he was the driving force behind Dire Straits, playing lead guitar and singing for them throughout their twenty-year career. He launched his solo career in 1996, a year after Dire Straits disbanded, and his debut album Golden Heart proved that he was a musical force to be reckoned with. He has gone from strength to strength since then, undertaken many collaborations with artists like Emmylou Harris (All the Roadrunning, released in 2006, a brilliant album). However, this ‘breath of fresh air’ is nothing revolutionary or peculiar; it is a merely an immensely talented guitarist who knows how to write inspired songs rooted in real life experiences. The sound is distinctly folk-rock, with a sound often similar to Amy Macdonald’s This is the Life (2007, another classic album well worth buying) in its careful yet free-flowing use of melody and chords. Get Lucky is an album with a great deal of personal history behind the lyrics, much of it from Knopfler’s childhood. The track So Far From the Clyde is a beautiful lament for the decline of the shipbuilding industry in the north, Piper to the End is written for his uncle, a casualty
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of the Second World War, and Border Reiver has a distinctly Celtic sound; it is written for the lorry drivers of the 60s, who the young Mark would watch driving away down south, inspiring what Knopfler himself called his “Blossoming romance with London”. Knopfler has never reached fantastic heights of popularity, but each track on each album is immersed in history, each has a story to tell, and it is this that gives the music a deeper appeal; there are no filler tracks, no cheap, quick attempts at a catchy hit. He writes for the love of music. Far from the tedious contemporary focus on ‘relationships’, his music mostly avoids the subject, instead composing what might be called snapshots of a changing England. For the musicians amongst you, you will also appreciate the skill in Knopfler’s songs. His vocal style is not universally popular, but his clear voice is melodic and tuneful, and his guitar work so precise as to be minimalist in its beauty. His music is often classed as country, and that is often true, but he carves out a niche in that genre that is unmistakably his own. My star rating for this album is a good solid four out of five. Whether you’re a fan of Dire Straits (like yours truly!), an appreciative musician, or just looking for an album of great songs and meaningful lyrics, then you could do far worse than Get Lucky.
GAMES
reviews@flexnews.co.uk
Mafia II
PC / PS3 / XBOX 360 Text Dan Butt If you’ve played the first Mafia, you’ll know roughly what to expect in this one – a great soundtrack, haranguing police force, and huge city in which to listen to tunes and be arrested, respectively. The difficulty seems a little less overwhelming than that of its predecessor – which was about as easy as going up against Capone’s mob single-handedly – so newer players won’t have their patience tested quite as much. As the name would imply, there are a lot of Italian-Americans discussing crime in the cut scenes – it goes without saying that if you’re not a fan of gangster movies and good old-fashioned ‘moider’, there won’t be much apart from the music keeping you interested in this release. That aside, the characters are deeper than the average game’s two-dimensional fodder, the dialogue is entertaining in a profanity-laden sort of way, and the plot is compelling, with one mission making a clever nod in the direction of the first game. There are some nice little details to help with the immersion – in the protagonist’s house alone, you can have a small adventure in the form of downing a few bottled beers from your delightful 50s fridge and drunkenly turning taps on and off. Granted, this isn’t as exciting as say, speeding from the cops, or assassinating a gang lord, but it’s the little things that count.
One novelty in Mafia II is the involvement of Playboy magazine. There are 50 scantily clad centrefolds scattered throughout the game – whether lying on the floor of an otherwise immaculate gun shop, or hidden away in a rival gang’s warehouse full of contraband. One of these did lead to the flow-breaking moment of backing against some crates in a heated gun battle, attempting to reload, but instead receiving an eyeful of 50s breasts – so watch out for that. The game’s developers, 2K, claimed the inclusion of nudey pics was all in the name of authenticity of 50s culture, although don’t expect that excuse to lower any raised eyebrows of passers-by catching you ogling. The music is worth returning to – the first Mafia game had the great Django Reindhart providing the perfect backing for driving around the 20s and 30s themed town, amongst others, whilst this time around Bing Crosby, The Andrews Sisters and Little Richard all throw you into the 50s with aplomb. Keep an ear out for Sandy Nelson’s ‘Teen Beat’ as the perfect track to play merry hell with the city’s police force to. In short, it’s an immersive dip into 50s crime; whilst it may not be set in the golden age of mobsters, it’s nevertheless worth playing if you have an itchy Tommy gun finger.
METROID OTHER M NINTENDO WII Text Karl Shaddick In 2006 Nintendo created a pioneering games console, one that would bring families and friends together through shaking a remote frantically and jumping around at a television screen. It was great; you could go bowling or the golf range without having to leave the comfort of your living room. But do you know what the problem with the Nintendo Wii is? It gets very tiresome real quick, games like Wii Fit are just an excuse to tell people you are “doing excercise”, and the graphics, well quite frankly are barely better then the N64 (which was released almost 10 years prior). Most of the time I regret spending £180 on my Wii, however there are a few times that I’m actually quite glad. For instance when The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess was released as well as Super Smash Bros Brawl (what could be more satisfying than playing as Mario and beating the living daylights out of Princess Peach, I mean how often can you get kidnapped by a 10ft dinosaur woman? Damn!). Recently I’ve been looking for reasons to dust it off my Wii, unplug the Xbox 360 and give it another chance, and Metroid Other M provided me with this opportunity. After a rather lengthy intro, Samus (our protagonist) finally starts her (yes that’s right, I said her, Samus is a hard assed female bounty
hunter) adventure by responding to a distress call from a massive ship inhabited by an assortment of deadly aliens (sweet). When she lands, she finds a group of Galactic Federation marines have already landed. Among the group is Samus’s former commander. He reluctantly allows Samus to help out in the investigation, which is a good thing, because without her they wouldn’t even be able to get past the first door (stupid marines), and so the story begins..... This new game to the Meteoroid series is literally a game of two halves that won’t appeal to all gamers. If you’re looking for a FPS then you’re bang outta luck; this is primarily a TPS, you can switch to a first person prospective view but you can’t actually walk around the map, this is actually the exact opposite to the last three games in the series, however will bring back memories for the old skool gamers (such as myself ) who remember the SNES original. A few new features have been added, most notably Samus now has a voice (sulky to say the least) however this does not detract from the fact she still has all the same signature moves (which includes a rocket launcher). The verdict: If you’ve played Metroid before you’re bound to like this, it’s fast paced and will keep you playing for hour; if you’ve never played a Metroid game before I suggest starting on one of the earlier titles (the story will only confuse you).
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LIFESTYLE
LIFESTYLE
THIS MONTH
Eat Drink Listen Wear Watch
... at the Wheelhouse in Falmouth. Best seafood you’ll ever have!
... anything you want, at the Stannary. It’s Fresher’s!
... to Lissie. Her voice is enchanting.
... an aviator jacket!
... Mad Men on BBC4. If you’re not already familiar, you’ll love it. Also perfect for inspiring those autumn/winter wardrobes!
HOW MUCH IS £1 REALLY WORTH? Text Press Release
Buying 3 broken toasters, a Spoon from The Ivy, 7 goldfish, a compost bin, a framed Constable painting, a signed Aldershot FC shirt and two packets of Jaffa Cakes is an average week for Oli Haydon. He ll start the day like anyone else, climb out of bed and pass through the clutter that a student of today tends to collect, but this is no ordinary clutter. During the summer Oli was inspired by a news story to begin his latest adventure. Following on from his 365 Random Acts of Kindness, he is now attempting to show the world how much you can get for a simple pound coin. Along with his team of deal hunters, he will be searching the web, through newspapers as well as sending pound coins to businesses and restaurants. Armed with £365 he ll be spending a pound a day on whatever he can get his hands on and record his purchases online. We had a chance to catch up with Oli earlier.
How did you come up with the idea?
What have you bought so far?
I got the idea when I was watching a BBC news story about the value of a pound. I began thinking to myself, well how can a pound have a value? To me a pound has always been a bottle of Coke, a packet of Football stickers or a bag of sugar. I wanted to do this experiment to see how much a pound is really worth, how much someone, with a little hard work, can really get for a single pound coin. So I decided to spend £1 a day for 365 days, recording my purchases on my website then at the end of the year, I’d sell my items and give all the money to charity.
I’ve only just put my idea to work really so I don’t have many items to show for my work yet. So far I’ve got a £15 supermarket voucher that someone didn’t want, a spoon from London’s most prestigious restaurant and a beautifully framed Constable painting.
Have you had much interest so far? It’s been a slow start for me, the website only went live a few days ago but my friends and family have been trying to spread the word and they’ve all said it’s a brilliant idea. I only need one big break to get this thing really rolling.
What charity will the money be going to? I’m hoping at the end of the year I will know which charity to give the money too. I should be able to get quite a lot more for the items that I paid for them, so long as I can get good return visitor numbers. Shelter is a London charity for the homeless, quite poignant since the homeless would happily be given a pound a day. Perhaps the Pakistan flood appeal or Red Cross, I’m really not sure yet, hopefully it will just come to me.
What can people do to help? All I really need is for people to follow me online at www.Olihaydon.com. Aside from that, I ve got a loyal group of helpers scouring websites and adverts for me to find me the most awesome stuff for this adventure. I d just really appreciate people signing up, subscribe via email or RSS and sending me an email if you find yourself staring at something amazing that has a £1 price tag.
Visit Oli’s online blog now and see his latest purchases at: www.olihaydon.com
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“As As anan Island Island Nation Nation we owe wemuch oweofmuch our heritage of ourand culture to heritage the sea. Noand where culture is this more to the apparent sea. than Cornwall.” Olympus Olympus OM10 OM10 50mm Kodak f 1.8Tri-X 400 Tri-X 400 film
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LIFESTYLE
FRESHERS
10 things a Fresher should never be without… Text Samantha Stocker
2
1 4 6 5 7 8 9 10 ALCOHOL
a crate of beer as a doorstop will never fail to
make friends with your new flatmates and will
keep your door open inviting your flatmates into your room for an introductory chat. It is also a
staple of Fresher’s fortnight; be prepared to wake up with a hang-over every morning, but hair of the dog always seems to do the trick.
FANCY DRESS
the variety of fancy dress nights
DIARY
at the Stannary and around town
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always warrant various fancy dress
there will be so many events; nights out, introductory
outfits. The more extravagant the
sessions for your course, Fresher’s Fair etc that you will
better and everyone should get
need a diary or a wall planner to ensure that you attend not
thoroughly involved.
only the social events but the more serious events that will enable you to get your degree off to a flying start.
DISPOSABLE CAMERA comedy Fresher’s nights have to be caught
on camera and a disposable one is the perfect
option due to the fact that is it likely that when highly intoxicated you will leave your brand
new Sony digital camera in the Stannary/taxi/ toilet/Remedies etc.
PARACETAMOL
the constant hangover/drunken antics will
undoubtedly induce a bout of Fresher’s Flu which will
TAXI NUMBERS/ BUS TIMETABLE
spread around campus like wild fire. Tablets of any
kind will attempt to quash the alcohol headache and
at first, the bus stops at Tremough can be a little
the flu like symptoms.
tricky to decipher, so it is best to check before you hop on one and end up in Truro as opposed to the Moor. It is also useful to make sure you have a range of taxi numbers with you before you head into town,
PACK OF CARDS
as you may end up doing the dreaded walk from Falmouth Town up to campus at 3am. Not fun.
there will inevitably be an evening when the idea of drinking games will be raised; to participate fully in these escapades a pack of cards is a necessity.
CHARM
They will be a welcome addition to those nights you
decide to stay in, but as a Fresher staying in does not
There are certain people on campus you may want to win over. The Porters and the
mean having an early night; it most certainly means
Cleaners are essential people to keep on your good side, as you will be more likely to escape
getting as drunk as possible because you do not have
fines for loud music or avoid reprimands for excessive washing up if you charm them. Don’t
to find your way back home
tell them though because they won’t admit it! Oh and don’t forget everyone’s favourite, Charlie; charm Charlie and you will have that broken light bulb or leaky shower fixed within the day. He might also ferry you to the library on his cart if you ask nicely.
BLU-TAK
Although you are not supposed to decorate the walls in Glasney, a few posters or photographs on the walls can be the ultimate cure for that
early bout of homesickness. Try to go for whitetak as it is less likely to mark the walls but you are highly likely to get away with a couple of
A SMILE
marks.
lastly, as a Fresher you should never be without a smile.
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Enjoy yourself and good luck making new friends!
Is this you?
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LIFESTYLE
RECIPES
Fresher’s Fancies Text Annabel Charlesworth
The time for Fresher’s week approaches again and I still have not found the perfect nutritional way to avoid a hangover...sorry about that! For me, despite the glass of milk and banana, large meal before drinking, or indeed whatever prevention or cure is currently being touted, I always find that the morning after the traditional Stannary pirate party is inevitably a lost one. Dedicating such a morning to a lie-in and generally feeling sorry for myself, just the thought of anything except a chocolate bar or a
Pancakes
You may laugh, thinking who in their right mind would ever think of making pancakes with a hangover, but seriously if you have them with fresh fruit and maple syrup or Nutella what could actually be better and more appealing for breakfast? Also handy if you are still entertaining guests from the night before... everyone loves pancakes. Oh, and they’re made with stuff you or your housemates are likely to have lying around. Makes a generous portion for two. 150g plain flour 1 dessert spoon baking powder 1 teaspoon bicarbonate of soda 20g caster sugar Pinch of salt 1 egg 250ml milk 1 tablespoon butter, melted Fresh fruit (I used strawberries) Maple syrup or nutella In a bowl combine the dry ingredients, then beat in the milk and egg. When you have a thick smooth batter, keep stirring as you add in the melted butter then you are ready to go. Put a non-stick frying pan over a medium heat and whilst it is warming up slice your fruit and set aside. Now pour generous tablespoons of mixture into the hot pan, making sure that the circles don’t touch. The pancakes are ready to turn when large bubbles appear at the surface; flip them over and brown on the other side for a minute or so. Move them onto a plate and get going on the next batch. When you have done enough smother with syrup and the fruit and enjoy.
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plate of pesto pasta seems beyond my talents of food production. However, on experimentation the best way forward is not through whatever looks appetising and easy in the fridge like yesterday’s pasta bake, but through a combination of store-cupboard, acid neutralising, energy giving carbs and fresh veg. I know it sounds boring but the following recipes are relatively simple and full of vitamins, ready to get you up and going ready for the first lecture, or for the next Fresher’s event!
Hot smoked salmon Roasted vegetable and pea tagliatelle Moroccan couscous with chicken
This isn’t quite as straight forward or as cheap as pasta with pesto and cheese, but is health-wise a far superior meal. It is high in protein so is satisfying, omega fish oils to replenish brain cells, as well as the fact that a portion of peas has as much vitamin C as an orange to keep coughs and colds at bay. All this whilst missing out the fat from the cheese and oil from the pesto. Speed wise, provided you get the right fish portion then you can do this in a single saucepan in about 10 minutes. The portions that I mean are sold in the fridge next to the fish counter, next to the boil in the bag kippers, are vacuum packed and cost £1.50. This recipe is also flexible, as you can see from the picture I used courgettes, so you too could use whatever you have from spinach to broccoli- it’s up to you. 1 portion lightly smoked salmon Enough pasta to feed you 1 tablespoon of crème fraiche Handful of peas Place a large saucepan of salted water onto a high heat to bring up to the boil. Without opening the fish packet, put it on a plate and into a microwave for 4 minutes. When the water is boiling, add the pasta and cook according to packet instructions, and 2 minutes before it is ready add the peas. Meanwhile take the cooked fish out of the microwave, open up the bag and flake up the fish using a fork onto a waiting plate, making sure that you separate the skin away from the flesh. When the pasta is ready, drain and return to the pan alongside the crème fraiche and the flaked salmon. Stir it all together, grind over some black pepper and enjoy!
This is something I cook quite a bit, mainly because it’s low in fat and looks quite impressive, yet is still a one-pot dish. It does take time to cook, but by making a large portion I can then stick the remainder in a lunchbox and take it up to uni for lunch the following day. The best way to do this is to have it hot the night you go out, then when the leftovers have cooled, tip into a lunchbox and put in the fridge and you can grab it on your way out the door. Failing that, the leftovers can be microwaved on high for about 3 minutes, stirring half way through, and make a pretty good hot lunch. 1 red pepper 2 tomatoes 1 courgette 2 garlic cloves 2-3 tablespoons olive oil Two handfuls couscous 2 chicken breasts 2-3 tablespoons harissa paste Turn the oven on to 220˚c/ gas mark 7. Slice up the pepper into large chunks, the tomatoes into quarters, the courgette into rounds, and peel the garlic cloves. Place in a medium sized baking dish, drizzle over the olive oil and put into the oven. Put the kettle on. Chop the chicken breasts into small chunks, place back into their packaging and spoon over the harissa paste, set aside. Put the couscous into a bowl and pour over enough warm water from the kettle to cover the couscous well, set this aside too. Now you can have a 20-30 minute break whilst the veg is roasting. When you come back, tip the couscous and the raw chicken into the baking dish and combine it all together making sure that the veg and chicken are evenly distributed. Drizzle over a bit more olive oil and return to the oven. Check the chicken after 20 minutes; if the biggest chunk is not cooked through then return it to the oven for another 10 minutes. Then providing that the chicken is cooked it should be ready to eat.
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FASHION
Falmouths Fashion Fix Text Michael Swann
When Rio Fashion Week was drawing to a close, and Milan Men’s Fashion Week was fast approaching, the world of glamorous garb and throwaway trends was buzzing away across the world. In this little town of Falmouth, we celebrated our own fashion heroes. June 1st, and Events Square saw the Falmouth University Fashion Show, presenting work from the first ever graduates of the Fashion Design and Performance Sportswear Design courses (as well as work from first and second year students). A mêlée of colour palettes, detailed embellishments and refined styles paraded their way down the runway, in an event that concludes the 3 year courses in a way only the glamour of a fashion show can achieve. I can’t help but think to myself; is there room enough in the ever re-edited book that is Fashion for these budding new chapters? From a student fashion show there are a few things you may expect to see; collections inspired by the more avant-garde of designers (and with the recent death of Alexander McQueen, and his influence on the youth of fashion, this seemed all too likely) or outfits and jewellery based on the Lady Gaga-ian explosion (an unfortunate pre-assumption I held). And with half the show dedicated to Performance Sportswear, I wondered how much originality would actually be shown. But of course, I forget that this is a student show! I am reminded throughout that these young designers are the height of originality. When the likes of Frida Giannini for Gucci, or Chris Bailey for Burberry sit down to design they have a whole host of frictions to face; previous stunning collections, decades of brand heritage and a clientele to satisfy. This scenario is not the same for the graduates; they have not the pressure of what went before. They can focus on the future, and the future looks good! What is most refreshing to see is the perfect mix of the charmingly wearable and the contemporary impracticality; with some beautifully cut outfits that you could easily imagine on the street, and some more conceptual pieces that really spice up a runway show, giving something a little more fun and a little more exciting to behold. Pictured is the work of Lois Warwick, whose adorably quaint collection struck a chord with my love for pastel colours. Most impressive though were the Performance Sportswear Design pieces; this is where the show was most fascinating. A design world somewhat oblivious to me, Sportswear seemed a genre of fashion that needed a simple design and a stronger sense of practicality to survive, however the work shown was oozing creativity, conceptuality, and stylishness. It was the intricately bejewelled surf-wear of Stacey Penney (rightly presented with a Sri Lanka Design Festival Award) and the beautifully simple and sleek, Olympic inspired collection of Abigail Fay that impressed most, showing great conceptual and technical talent from both designers. Accompanied by styling from Susie Couthard (stylist to the likes of Mark Ronson and Dizzee Rascal), make-up from Nikki Palmer (think Girls Aloud and Sophie Ellis-Bextor) and hair styled by those at Toni & Guy in Falmouth, the clothes paraded down the catwalk had no chance but to scream with grandeur and style. From the delightfully chic to the enchantingly garish, this year’s Fashion Show showcases it all; an ensemble of great talent and fresh imagination, references to the past with a futurefacing step in the right direction and some quick intimations to the future stars of the 2011 and 2012 graduate shows. With work as impressive and unique as this, it is safe to say that for these young designers, the end of a degree is the start of a conquering career in Fashion and Sportswear.
Lois Warwick
“OOZING CREATIVITY, CONCEPTUALITY, Stacey Penney
& STYLISHNESS” 29
LIFESTYLE
FASHION
12 of the best outerwear for under £100 Text Fiona Davies This is definitely coat season, which seems an odd statement considering every autumn/ winter is the season for wearing coats. But something extraordinary seemed to happen at the a/w ’10 shows. More so than ever, the coat dominated the catwalk in every shape, design and fabric imaginable, and it has left many of us struggling to decide which to buy. In an ideal world we’d love to say “I’ll have one of each” but times continue to be hard and money certainly is an object
Aviators are rife this season, and is it any wonder after the perfectly executed designs shown on the Burberry Prorsum catwalks? Trouble is, they tend to carry a hefty price tag, so here are three of the best copies for under £100. From top, left: Burberry Autumn/ Winter ’10; Faux leather & Shearling biker jacket £24.99, H&M; Faux leather & Shearling aviator £59.99, River Island; Faux Shearling aviator jacket £78, Topshop.
This season outerwear has a new member, the cape. It may not be the warmest type of coat but it sure is a chic way to cover up and is bound to get lots of admiring glances. Take a leaf out of Philip Lim’s a/w ‘10 book and keep it cropped for a “shrug” effect, or wear yours long and blanket-like as an elegant winter warmer. From top, left: Philip Lim A/W ’10; Cape parker £42, Miss Selfridge; Hooded cape £59.99, River Island; Hooded military cape £70, ASOS.
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when you’re living in your overdraft. So we at Flex have put together a collection of 12 of the best winter coats and jackets for four of the key trends – all priced at under £100. Some are worth an investment and some can be bought with just a week’s wages. Whatever your taste, we’ve narrowed it down to the best out in the shops now.
lifestyle@flexnews.co.uk
FASHION Also returning this season is the fur coat or, the Teddy Bear jacket, as it was dubbed at the Balmain a/w ’10 show. Thick and fluffy and in any colour (purple was their statement colour) the idea is to keep chip and snug this season, with that hint of vintage glamour. Animal print is a huge trend this year so call on two trends at a time with a leopard print design. If faux fur is a bit too much for you, nod to the trend with a mongolian gilet – easily worn during the daytime too. From top, left: Balmain a/w ’10; Cropped faux fur jacket £34.99, New Look; Mongolian style gilet £45, Dorothy Perkins; Belted leopard coat £75, ASOS.
An old favourite has once again made its way back into the lime light, this time in the form of a luxurious coat. The military jacket, or trench, packs a fashionably powerful punch and is one worth investing in if you can’t decide to between “classic lady-like’ or “country heritage” this season. Make sure the collar is oversized and the waist is belted – double breasting a given. From top, left: Burberry a/w ’10; Cropped military jacket £39.99, Zara; Military coat £69.99, New Look; Belted military coat £80, Topshop.
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LIFESTYLE
EVENINGS
Well Why Not? Text Ben Perks
Two students from University College Falmouth have created a brand new music night in Cornwall. Why Productions is the brainchild of graduated photography student, Tom Mucklow Price and animation student, Jackson Tayler. The producers promise to deliver something fresh to the student night scene, starting with “Durty Disco” on 2nd October at Falmouth Rugby Club. “I think Falmouth has been lacking really good student nights, but that’s going to change from October. We Just want people to enjoy themselves, the music and we want people dancing.” Said Jackson. The night is planned to be a regular fixture with DJs and live acts from October onwards. The student producers have not confined themselves to a set genre of music, believing that it can cater for most. “We’re not set to one type of genre. There’s going to be a bit of Motown, eclectic 90s, Dub-step, funky house – basically anything to get the limbs moving.” Said the animation student.
Jackson and Tom have always wanted to start a productions company and they enjoy bringing all the components of a musical event together. “We want to bring all the best experiences of a good night out together: good music, good venue and most importantly good people.” Said the student producer. Drinks promotions will be running until 11pm on the night and tickets can be bought from Level skate shop and Tsars in Falmouth, or from the FXU on Tremough Campus. For more information about upcoming events check it out on Facebook, by searching for Why Productions.
“I think Falmouth has been lacking really good student nights...”
HELP SAVE CHRSITMAS FOR YOUR LOCAL TOWN, PENRYN! Volunteer a Sunday morning to help the lovely folks of Penryn to check and put up the beautiful town christmas lights. From Sunday 3rd October - 4th December for the switch on.
HELP SAVE CHRSITMAS FOR YOUR LOCAL TOWN, PENRYN! Contact FXU for details. . .because everyone loves christmas! Volunteer a Sunday morning to help the lovely folks of Penryn to check andvolunteering put up the beautiful town christmas lights. For other opportunities please contact From Sunday 3rd October 4th December for the switch Sally on communityaction@fxu.org.uk on.
MUCH LOVE FXU. loves christmas! Contact FXU for details. . .because everyone For other volunteering opportunities please contact Sally on communityaction@fxu.org.uk MUCH LOVE FXU. 32
lifestyle@flexnews.co.uk
HOROSCOPES
Horoscopes, Yearly Outlook 2010 Text &Image Faye Simms | www.candyflameyeah.blogspot.com | All original paintings for sale £25 | contact 07531871860 or Here and Now gallery
Aries In 2010, you will have a positive outlook on life. Be careful not to be over-confident. Aries will travel on short journeys, and through hard work, will bear fruit. Taurus In 2010 you will become aware of music, arts and drama. Don’t be self centred, despite temptation. You will achieve your goals through tenacity and strong will-power. Gemini In 2010, Gemini will desire to be at the head of all affairs. You will not be scared to change that which you do not like. You live for today, and not tomorrow. Cancer In 2010, you will work hard. If not careful, your hard work will tire you out. You may be forced into doing bad deeds. Contemplation may cause loss so is best avoided. Leo In 2010, you may be a bit unstable and emotional at times. You will have a tendency to earn a lot of money, but spend it likewise. You will also show artistic and poetic tendencies. Virgo In 2010 you show clever and original ideas. Sometimes you might be stubborn, and people will find getting along with you difficult. In 2010 you will also display noble deeds. Libra In 2010 you will have unusual and original ideas about art, and love. You will also be very optimistic and this will inspire others. Scorpio In 2010 you will experience a lot of changes in your life. You have a lot of energy, and must focus this otherwise it will be wasted.
The BrewHouse Brewery oon S ing ough m Co Trem us to amp C
Sagittarius In 2010 you must beware to have strong and focussed ideas otherwise you will drift and go off course. You will also be courageous, ambitious, and self motivating. Capricorn In 2010 you will see success. Your tests and trials will be met with success, but you must remember to stay focussed. On the whole, this is a successful year. Aquarius In 2010, travelling will be fruitful and bring pleasure. You may also receive monetary benefits, and you will live with good health. Pisces In 2010, try not to be self-centred. There will be many trials and test to make sure you overcome any self-centeredness.
“Owned by Students, run by Students” 33
SPORTS
SPORTS
L’INTRODUCTION Text Chris Rushton Welcome Freshers and O.G’s alike. I’m Editor Chris Rushton and you will be delighted to know that you have made your way to what will only loosely be described as the Sports section, the part of the paper which I believe – in my obviously humble opinion – you should turn to first every month. I’ve gathered together a motley selection of students and forced them under duress to deliver what can only be described as the finest
examples of sporting life the University and the world around has to offer. My aim with this section is for it to be based on the writers and their experiences. I want you to feel what they feel. I want you to walk in their shoes. I want you to be like the Siamese twin hanging off their face that they never had (to coin a cliché). In these articles you will get to know their personalities and in
turn, really get to know how sick ting sport truly is down here in Cornwall. So if you read this introductory piece first (and I hope you did, as I haven’t actually offered any other content myself…), I will without further ado leave you to everyone who isn’t me to fulfil your needs. Which they will do. With as much inevitability as the persecution of the Jews, generation by generation. I’m discounting Munich. Mazletov.
a bit of Cornwall there are also some pretty advanced breaks on the north and south coasts. Getting to these places is only going to be possible if you have a car. The best thing to do is to get friendly with anyone you see with a board, you never know, they might drive! If you’re looking for a bit of punch then Porthtowan on a solid 6ft westerly groundswell can be hollow and heavy, just be ready to paddle out into a busy line-up with quite competitive surfers! The south coast also has some really nice spots which are possibly just a little more protected and locally surfed. They get crowded quick and are really very competitive, I’ve sat out at a more famous reef break and only caught two waves in a 2 hour session (whether that was because I was being a pussy or not I don’t know...). Wherever you surf, respect everyone in the water, even if they are, like me, on a bodyboard, although if you
fancy dropping in on a mate it’s always fun. Surfing in Cornwall, for me, has been about getting up at ridiculous times and driving to some remote spot, still smelling of Jaeger, and having empty right hand barrels with only two mates. There is no better a feeling than to walk to Gyllyngvase beach and surf the reef break right on our doorstep, this may only happen once a winter but when it does it’s quite special! Of course when I read the forecast wrong and end up getting dragged out to sea in 8-10 foot waves while my mate’s getting dragged toward a cliff (this actually happened) it might not be so fun. But when the conditions are right there are some quality waves to be had. So if you’re out and about in the water this year and you see a chap with a grey bodyboard and a nice looking hangover, don’t hesitate to say hi!
SURFING Text Francis Kellaway
One of the main reasons I chose to study at Exeter Cornwall Campus was for the surfing, there is such a huge range of beaches for all types of surf craft to get involved with. As a bodyboarder myself I’ve surfed all sorts of waves (badly) all over the place and can honestly say that, on the right day, with the right tide and wind direction, Cornwall has some world class breaks! The main places to try out if you’re new to the water are spots like Porthtowan or Praa Sands. If you’re really just starting off with surfing then Porthtowan surf school is a great way to get in the water in the first few weeks and meet people who are learning as well. They go every Wednesday and Saturday to wherever there is a good learning wave. Get in touch with them at the Freshers Fayre! For those who are more advanced surfers and want to explore
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sports@flexnews.co.uk
CLIMBING Text Paul Hayward My legs start to tremble uncontrollably, sweat drips down my brow, my stomach does a back flip and the fear starts to rise. I look between my legs at the dizzying distance to the ground and realise a fall will result in terminal cratering. Not good. The rope hangs uselessly from my harness, uninterrupted, trailing down to my belayer Joe, who to my dismay appears to be more interested in the local wildlife on the sea cliffs below than the fact I’m about to die. I try to stop my legs from doing their best Elvis impression, but it’s no good. Now my hands are sweating. The one good hold is becoming greasy; I chalk up for the hundredth time and scan the granite for somewhere to place some protection yet again. What use is a rope if it’s not attached to something? And why did I get so drunk last night? No! Concentrate. It’s no good. I’m stuck. “Errr, might need a rescue here guys…” I whimper, desperate to escape this situation. I try to convince myself its safe, a fall would be ok, determined not to give in, but in the back of my mind I know that’s simply not true. Then I see it! A flared crack in the rounded granite, a possibility to get some protection in, a place to guard the moves above. I place a cam and give it a yank; it stays, although looks sketchy. Sod it, I’m going for it. I clip my rope through the karabiner on the end of the cam. “Watch me, I’m gonna give it a look” I yell, bringing Joe’s attention back from the important job of picking his nails. Reaching high above me I put my right hand into a small crack, pulling down to lock my little finger into place, the granite bites into my skin. Leaning back I lift my right foot high and place it onto a small sloping edge. I pull hard and start to stand, searching for more holds with my left hand. A heady mixture of adrenaline and the remains of last night’s tenth pint of cider courses through my veins. My weight slowly transfers onto my right foot. More holds gradually come into reach. I grasp at them, and quickly move up. Soon I’m stood on a small ledge. I place more protection and breathe deeply, making promises to never do anything like this again. I clip the ropes into the protection and start to feel confidence returning. With the threat of (possible) death lessened I quickly finish the route, a smile starting to creep across my face. I reach the top and finally collapse, relief fills me. It was over, I’d survived. Joe quickly seconds the pitch, wondering what all the fuss was about, climbing confidently with the rope set up above him. As he climbs I think about the route. Was it really that scary and dangerous? Nah, I was fine. I could climb harder. If I’d fallen it would have just been sprained ankles, 10 meters isn’t that high... What was I so scared of? All memories of the fear and proximity to death evaporate, and all that’s left is satisfaction and the thought of what the next route will be. (Note: not all climbing requires scaring yourself shitless on some dodgy bit of granite. There are plenty of safe and well protected routes which are just as fun, but without the death bit. Get involved with the climbing club or go find out for yourselves!)
CRICKET Text Matt DuGay Anyone who has ever played cricket will know that it attracts a hugely diverse mix of people. This can be very clearly seen in Cornwall. Having played for two seasons, one each for two different clubs, i’ve encountered a huge mix of ages, backgrounds and personalities. Some of these personalities do lead to some pretty memorable incidents. One player, who won’t be named, often enjoyed a drink after the game and on a few occasions before and during the game as well. On one particularly merry afternoon said player had seen off two pints before the game. The toss resulted in us having a bat. This meant that another two pints were enjoyed during the opposition’s innings. A fifth pint of the day was polished off during tea, and at the first drinks break of our innings a pint was necked. An injury meant that the player, who was clearly inebriated, took up his fielding position at 1st slip. Two balls later a full delivery was snicked straight towards the slip cordon. What happened next shocked absolutely everyone. A full length, one-handed, diving
catch. Pulled off after six pints of very strong Cornish Cider. But don’t let that fool you. Cricket in the county is most certainly not a bunch of pissed up locals knocking about in a field. I’ve played at some of the nicest grounds I’ve ever seen. Some grounds enjoy stunning sea views; some are in the heart of the rural countryside, seemingly in the middle of nowhere, completely quiet and peaceful. Admittedly, I’ve also played on a few shocking tracks, with scores of less than 50 being about par for 40-over games. With that being said, you’d be forgiven for thinking that the standard of cricket in Cornwall was incredibly poor. It’s not. In actual fact a lot of very good sides play a pretty decent standard of competitive cricket in the area. CSM have their own cricket team, and there are also a number of local clubs in the Falmouth and Penryn area who provide a friendly atmosphere to play cricket, meet new people and have a laugh. So if you enjoy the sport of the Gods, Cornwall is definitely a place you’ll enjoy playing it!
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FOOTBALL Text Ryan Sweet Excitement is growing at a rapid rate here at Camborne School of Mines FC in anticipation of the fast approaching new season. Having played some fantastic football last year, winning both promotion to Mining League 1 and achieving a landslide victory in the prestigious Bottle Match along the way, we all know how difficult it will be living up to last season’s success. Something that will undoubtedly define our progress this year will be the club’s influx of new talent. Due to graduations we have lost several key players from our previous squad and so we must look to Freshers and existing Falmouth based students to come in and give CSM a go. I would therefore like to take this opportunity to reflect briefly upon my own experiences of Cornish football in order to give those who are interested an insight into life in the Mining Leagues. Having previously played for Fowey United FC in the Duchy Leagues (East Cornwall), my experience of Cornish league football actually began before I joined CSM. Though there are clear comparisons I could give between playing for my old local club and CSM in terms of opposition, facilities, standard of play etc., becoming part of the team last year stands out in my memory simply because of how welcome I was made to feel at the club. The atmosphere and unity within the squad last year was great and is something we are looking to build upon again. Team spirit is essential at any level and is something we pride ourselves on at CSM. It is also something we are looking to enhance this year with more
social events and general team bonding sessions. The pinnacle of any season for CSM is the Bottle Match and last year was no different. It was without doubt the highlight of my season last time round. Getting the chance to play against our infamous rivals Royal School of Mines was a very special occasion, enhanced further by the fact that all our other sports teams were competing with theirs on the same day, in front of the same excitable crowd. The atmosphere at the Bottle Match was unbelievable. You will never hear, anywhere else, banter like you do on Bottle Match day! We worked very hard going into the game last season and it paid off in style as we recorded a thumping 7-0 victory. I was lucky enough to play the whole game and never will I forget the support we had. University life can at times get a little stressful and so having the opportunity to play at a competitive level in a relaxed environment is a great way to unwind at weekends. Be aware though: Cornish football is a challenge and should not be taken lightly by anyone. Though some may argue that the standard is little scrappy down here, Cornish football does tend to be very physical and is made difficult by the unpredictable weather conditions and the diversity of pitches you play on. This shouldn’t put off any aspiring footballers though as it is this very challenge that makes Mining League football an exciting league to play in. I’ve seen many good footballers fail to make an impact, simply because they could not get used
to the way the game is played down here. Many have to adapt their game to fit in. I therefore issue a gauntlet to anyone who thinks they are good enough. Come and play for CSM! If are interested in playing for Camborne School of Mines FC, or would simply like more information please text Jimbo on 07809866963 or myself on the number in ‘Useful Stuff’. Also feel free to find our page on Facebook.
HOCKEY Text Jonno Harris Joining the CSM Hockey is one of the best decisions I have made in my 2 years down at Tremough! This claim is twofold, firstly, and most importantly for any budding athletes out there, the hockey teams here have, and continue to come on leaps and bounds. The 1st team have seen two promotions in the last 3 seasons, missing out on a 3rd by the narrowest of margins, the 2nd team continue to build and the 3rd team, thanks to the legendary commitment of Dave ‘Immy/the coin Jew’ Harveson, are now officially a league team and will be looking at making a serious name for themselves in Cornish hockey. Do not let these breathtaking statistics dissuade any one who is new to the game. Everyone will be given the time, and commitment by senior members of the team to do there very best to improve their game. On a second note, the social scene is second to none. Being the largest ‘multi gendered’ club (we are still trying to decide where Tom ‘Ducky’ Drake fits in!), I really do advise it as the best way to involve yourself during your time at Uni. It has opened up so many other doors for me. The Bottle Match, our annual varsity game sees us clashing horns with RSM, the Royal School of Mines in London. This is the sporting event of the year, with the hockey teams winning with ease for the 2 years I have been here. We have the Bottle this year, and with some cooperation from the rugby boys, we have no intention of letting it go! We have a fantastic committee, and with team commitment we
will be chasing promotion for at least 2 of the teams! Although Campus does not have its own Astroturf, we play all home games at the recently installed pitch just around the corner. To wrap things up, if you have the coordination to hold a stick, feel the urge to play with balls, and cannot resist yourself from getting
stuck in then look out for the hockey table during the Freshers Fayre, we are hard to miss, we are all gorgeous and will be most likely wearing our customised blue and yellow Canterbury training tops. So come along, sign up and get involved. You really will not regret it! I look forward to meeting you all!
USEFUL STUFF Text Chris Rushton
Don’t be shy, get to know us. Here you will find some information and contact details for the writers in this issue, who will help you to become integrated into sporting life whilst at University. University Emails? Check. Facebook? Check. Do we all look a little bit sexy in our profile pictures? Chizzeck. Oh, I suppose you can have you phone numbers too.
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Chris Rushton – cr267@ex.ac.uk - 07733367675 Matt DuGay - md290@exeter.ac.uk - 07702166595 Ryan Sweet - rs321@exeter.ac.uk - 07772237457 Paul Hayward - ph251@exeter.ac.uk - 07974403110 Jonathan Harris - jeth201@exeter.ac.uk – 07999619688 Francis Kellaway - fk215@exeter.ac.uk - 07545338218
Freshers Fayre takes place on Sunday 3rd October, where you will get to meet all the different clubs and societies. Make sure not to miss out!
FRESHERS GUIDE 2010
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FRESHERS 38
What the hell am I doing drinking in FA(lmouth) Text Jack Williams | Proprietor of 5 Degrees Below. When it comes to keeping your blood/alcohol levels dangerously skewed towards premature death, Ftown has your back. The year round drinking capital of Cornwall has a bar and a brew with your name on it, whether you’ve a nose for wine (served by the glass or by the box) or like to spill a pint or two of ale down your face,* the sauce served in this town will find a way to take your money, ransack your room, and not even leave a clue of a memory as evidence. Oh, and it’ll make damn sure that slammin’ hottie of a housemate won’t look you in the eye ever again. Weekends (...Thursday through Monday) have a distinct tendency to turn into gruelling and glorious endurance challenges, much like the Iron Man triathlon, but for your internal organs; or like a triple marathon, exclusively for your debit card. Units of alcohol consumed hit double figures with worrying ease, and the TRUELADs that walk amongst us will quite happily bat a century over a successful weekend (buuuuuuut come Tuesday they’ll have to pawn their iPods and SLRs...) In short, there is no shortage of ways and occasions to get pissed up now you’re in Falmouth, HOWEVER, it is the discerning drinker that knows exactly when and where to strike to get the best bang and booze and atmosphere for his hard earned buck student loan. ... What? You think this expertise just gets given away? Handed out like freshers’ welcome packs? No no no matey, you get to learn it for yourselves! This is that little part of the curriculum that gets missed out of your induction - the secrets guarded by locals from third years from second years from first years. You’ve got to test the waters double vodkas for yourself to work out how to steer clear of unwashed hippies sat on bar floors and leery locals shouting abuse at you and your hipster friends at 2am; how to avoid the suspiciously watery spirits of some grub-step blasting clubs as well as the perils of certain late night cuisine... GOOD LUCK. *If you like to drink WKD blue, fuck off outta here you pussy.
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FRESHERS GUIDE 2010
EATOUT KESSELS KITCHEN A sandwich shop like no other, Kessels Kitchen is a family run business selling the finest of sandwich delights. From sandwiches- paninis – baguettues – tiger baps, Kessells Kitchen is a shop that lets you eat something different from the standard fast food / national corporation chains. What makes Kessells special is that they pride themselves on using local produce. Fresher, tastier, more environmentally friendly, your sandwich will be better than any other. Located just opposite The Moor, a few doors away from Q Bar and Rowes, Kessells Kitchen is a pink nugget every student should eat at. You walk in,
and on your right is a display cabinet loaded with trays of sandwich fillings. Real bacon, chicken, beef, salami, salads, endless sauces, cheeses, literally you’ll be eating a delicatessen in every bite of your sandwich, the choice is that great! The portions are fantastically generous, the best you’ll see in Falmouth or surrounding area. The filling is actually spooned on two or three times over! Not letting the food experience down, the speed of service is fast as well. On a busy day, the max time you’d have to wait would be 5 minutes from queuing – ordering – eating. There can’t be any qualms either about the friendly staff. They do enough to make you
feel happy but not overly cringe worthy friendly when all you want is a sandwich. The quality of food is spiffing. Nothing to knock Kessells Kitchen at all. Your satisfaction will be 100% here. The tasty fresh produce, the quick service, the generous portion size; when you bite down, all you get is satisfaction knowing that you’ve found a sandwich shop that you’ll use time and time again. You must be thinking that the prices are steep in order to reflect this quality? You’re wrong. The prices are on average around the £3 mark, depending on what you order. The choice :to eat at Kessells or elsewhere? Once
Text Ian Pogonowski
you’ve tried Kessells, you’ll probably keep coming back. As a student, on your tight budget, you may be disappointed to hear that no student dis-
PREZZO Prezzo, pronounced “Pretzor”, is a lovely Italian restaurant located just by The Moor. You may be familiar of the brand Prezzo, as there are over 80 restaurants in the UK. Falmouth Prezzo lends itself well to its location, and interior decoration. What are your expectations on first dining in Prezzo? Everyone is different, but your mood is raised by walking into the plushest looking restaurant in that area. You may have seen this place on a daily occurrence on your escapades to Fal Town, but for your first time going to Prezzo, this will be good. On entry, you are confronted by a greeting table, which leads to tables
Text Ian Pogonowski
of people cluttering and chattering. The main focal point from most tables is the large open plan kitchen set in grand stone along the back wall. The contemporary and modern design is a fantastic. You’ll probably see no better restaurant design in Falmouth, so when you’re here, make the most of enjoying the dining experience. The seating is well spaced, however when really busy, the seating can seem a little too close for comfort as there are no dividers. Down to the most important part – what is the food like? You have to like Italian, by stereotyping students, you should like this! Pasta dishes, pizza dishes, grills and salads are all on offer
for mains. The quality of food is excellent. The taste – tantalizingly sexy; the presentation – like a lean trim athlete; the portion size – perfect. Nothing to complain about the food here. If you’re stuck on what to order- go for a calzone – you won’t be disappointed by this delight. Pricing is reasonable at Prezzo. They are standard restaurant prices: between £7 and £12 for a main, nothing to screw your nose up at. What you should look out for is the special offers, for example: a starter, main course, and drink for £10. These are regularly updated on their website, so check that out before you visit. Overall, in a student’s opinion – we
BAYSIDE GRILL Finally, our reviews come to an end, at no other place, then Bayside. Bayside Kebab shop is located centrally along Falmouth High Street, just a little past Club I. Open in the daytime, and night, one can expect to purchase usual kebaby food: kebabs, chips, burgers, pizza. Being a student, you will more than likely frequent Bayside after a night out in town to soak up some alcohol. Friendly staff, usual speed of service, indoor seating, Bayside is a nice resting point after storming around a dance floor for 2+hours. Bayside ap-
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count is offered. Yes you grumble, but in this instance – the quality of food is amazing, once you’ve tried it, you’ll be happy to give the 10% discount a miss.
pears to take safety into account as the business hires 2 bouncers to work the door on busy nights. The downside to Bayside is that after midnight, if you wish to buy food, you’ll have to stay inside until it’s eaten. Yes this may be annoying, but it offers a quality time to reflect on the night that has just happened. The chairs and table remind you of a school canteen, but this is fun, and nobody minds. The price is quite high, average around £3 for an item. When you’re drunk you won’t notice, but the added
can’t really get enough pasta/pizza/ grills whilst at uni. Why not dine out
and see the difference... definitely worth a visit.
Text Ian Pogonowski
dent into your wallet/purse may soon be noticed if you’re a regular frequenter. Adding to this, the healthy side of things isn’t too great either. If you’re a healthy person, I’d steer clear of Bayside, maybe using it as a once per term experience. There are not many other fast-food places open in Falmouth at 2/3am, so choice is limited. You’ve always got flat food though, which may prove a cheaper and healthier option. Overall, Bayside is good after a night out, a definite try once, but if you’re a healthy person, the saturated fats won’t thank you in the gym.
BARS&CLUBS THE SHED The Shed, a trendy cocktail bar located in Falmouth’s Events Square, is a favourite haunt of local residents and students alike. It possesses a quirky charm, whilst retaining its sophisticated atmosphere; think ‘50s glamour with a modern and typically ‘Falmouth’ twist. Whether you’re in the mood for a coffee with friends, a meal, or a big night-out, The Shed has something for everyone. Noticeably, the drinks menu is considerably longer than any other, with extensive wine and cocktail lists. Monday nights are typically one of the busiest, due to the popularity of Monday as a student night out and The Shed’s “2 for £5” cocktail promotion. So for those on a budget, the cock-
tails are well made and offer value for money. However, be prepared to mix and match cocktails with friends for some variety, as the promotion requires that the cocktails be the same and the range represents only a small selection of their drinks menu. For those looking for something a bit different, the main menu offers an inventive range of drinks at reasonable prices. Service is typically quick and friendly, but be prepared to wait during busy periods. The Shed also offers outdoor seating and shelter for those wanting to sit outside and soak up the sunshine (or starlight), or have a leisurely cigarette whilst people-watching. Close to the beach, The Shed offers a stop-off point on the way
Text Helen Orphin
back home through town after a hard day sunbathing and sea-swimming. For those on a night out, it provides either a starting point before moving onto other bars and clubs, or a cocktail fuelled evening. The Shed doesn’t usually host live music except for special occasions, which can generate a somewhat bland atmosphere; however, this does provide the opportunity for conversation lacking in some other bars. It is worth noting that Events Square is beyond the centre of town, so it can feel like a trek to get there (especially for those in six-inch heels) but it’s typically worth it once inside. Open from 9:30am, just in time for a late breakfast, through to 11:30pm, it’s easy to while away the
hours in The Shed. Food is served from 10am until 10pm and the menu offers a range of cuisine, with vegetarian options and child-friendly meals. There is also a selection of freshly-caught fish and seafood at very good value for
Q BAR Situated on Falmouth Moor, Q Bar is within easily stumbling-reach of the bus stop and taxi rank. I mention this not to imply that you’ll need a quick ride home after a slow and uneventful night, but because there is every chance you’ll need a quick ride home as you waver between the zones of heady content and complete unconsciousness. This is in particular reference to the effects of an Angel Kiss, Cookie Monster, or Monkey’s Brain – just a few of the ‘Friendly Fires’ shots for which Q Bar is famed. Consisting of fifteen colourful potencies, the ‘Friendly Fires’ are uniquely flavoured and damnably strong, qualities that seal your fate as you find yourself
money, though they do offer some more expensive dishes for special occasions and large groups. For more information contact The Shed Restaurant and Cocktail Bar on 01326 318502 or ask a member of staff.
Text Dora Eisele
going back for more. Oh, and expect fireworks when you order the pride of the shot-world – the Cookie Monster, of which the fireworks are literal, the shot is two-fold and the recipe is, incredibly, still a secret. Aside from an impressive drinks menu, Q Bar deserves stellar recognition for its atmosphere, decorative creativity, and general good vibes. Recently refurbished, the walls stream with graffiti and the seating encircles a frequentlyfilled dance-floor, with two upstairs lounges that house fairy-lights, sofas, and a balconied DJ booth. What continues to draw people to Q Bar is the fact that, despite this revamp, it has retained the warmth, energy, and char-
acter that it always had, meaning that it thankfully remains far from having the same ambience of cold sterility that many tediously “trendy” evening hotspots seem to favour. Mondays, Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays see Q Bar buzzing with punters well into the small hours, and the days in between play host to weekly film nights (Tuesdays) and open-deck nights (Wednesdays). Such nights are quieter, yes, but are not without their charm. They establish Q Bar as more than just a drinking-house; it is also a place of comfortable socialising and easy respite from the tedium of textbooks and essays. And with the talents of various DJs, the soundtrack to your
night is guaranteed to be good too. The tunes usually consist of classic reggae, indie-rock and Motown; throw in some exceptionally grimy dub step and you have yourself a perfect Q Bar playlist. From a great deal of experience, Q Bar has a way of inviting and engaging you so that, come what may, the music is always perfectly tailored to the atmosphere of the night. When you want to dance, you can bet that the music is danceable. When you want to relax, you can similarly bet that the music will do that for you. All in all, heading to Q Bar makes for a great night out. Or in, with a film and popcorn. Even if you don’t head to Q Bar, you’ll end up there at some point – it’s one of those places
CLUB INTERNATIONAL If you’ve only been at university for a couple of days you’ve probably already heard about Club International, A.K.A Club I. It is one of three clubs in Falmouth town centre; found up the stairs in the Arcade next to Mango Tango, it appears as an unassuming stairway. As soon as you round the corner at the top of the flight the façade is lifted and you are confronted with smoke, lights and mirrors – welcome to Club I. As student haunts go, this place is legendary. This is the place where every student’s dreams are made
“PARTY HARD”
and broken, a meeting place for all the mixes of students from art students to CSM, where social boundaries are smashed in a combination of cheesy pop and refresher cocktails, in a setting which can only be described as a habitat for drunken debauchery. If you’re looking for somewhere to relax and let your hair down Club I is the place for you. There are no pretences about it, and everyone goes there for one reason – to have fun. Open from 10pm and normally picking up at about midnight, Club
I will party on until 2.30am every Thursday, Friday and Saturday. The dance-floor takes up most of the club, with direct access to the bars so you can stumble through the waving crowds and flounce on the bar to order your next set of cheap shots. What’s more, as places in Falmouth go, Club I probably has the best cost:fun ratio in town. Don’t expect it to burn a hole in your pocket like some of the other bars; drinks acheap and a-plenty is the name of the game! Facilities include 3 bars, men’s and
that is impossible to avoid, because it draws you in. More simply, it’s just too damn good to miss.
Text Sam Baldwin
ladies’ toilets, and a reliable cloakroom. For smokers, or even if you just need a breather from the intensity that is Club I, you can go outside with a stamp which will allow you re-entry, and will also serve as a reminder of the awesome night you’ve just had.
“A HABITAT FOR DRUNKEN DEBAUCHERY” 41
FRESHERS GUIDE 2010
THREADS SUPERDRY Coming to uni on a tight budget? The last thing you want to do is spend money right? Well... If you’ve not met the clothes shop “Superdry” before, you may wish you’d have stayed at home! Why you ask? Not because it’s bad, because it’s fantastic! Superdry sells amazing clothes. For men and women, Superdry is a must-see shop. You walk in; get to listen to trendy music at a reasonable volume, but just the right mix to get you into the party spirit whilst browsing. As you walk through the shop, all you see is branded Superdry clothes; it’s as if you’re on a different continent! Superdry is a British Company,
founded in 2003, so is relatively new to the fashion scene. Attracting the likes of David Beckham, Justin Bieber, Zac Efron, Bradley Cooper and Helena Christensen – Superdry attracts a special type of person. If you like wearing Cult clothing, Superdry is the shop for you. The clothes stand out in a fantastic sort of way. If you know what Superdry is, you’ll notice it on the streets as you’re walking by. Superdry stands on a more acceptable level in society than Jack Wills or Joules, as it doesn’t hold the pretence of “posh” like the other two. The clothes are long lasting, great quality, look great, but most importantly – they are original. Superdry
Text Ian Pogonowski
has a niche in the fashion market that makes Superdry what it is. Superdry is rapidly becoming a student shop for Uni Students. You’ll sit in lectures and see unmistakable checkered hoodies, or eagles, or Japanese style clothing. All Superdry. Cosy, classy, and attractive, who wouldn’t want to be wearing it? Needless to say, if you’re an Exeter student, those up at Streatham Campus now supposedly don Superdry as their new Jack Wills – Ra Ra for Superdry! You may cry when you hear this, but there is one downside to Superdry. Remember that “tight budget” thing about coming to uni? Yes, well, Super-
SESSIONS Sessions is somewhat unassuming from the outside; it is, evidently, a surf shop, as can be gathered from the bright hibiscus florals and punchy chequers that decorate the window mannequins, and more obviously from the various boards that lean casually against the walls. Once inside, though, you would be forgiven for being surprised by the size of the shop, and the amount of surf-stuffs that fill the space. As Sessions is one of Falmouth’s largest and most extensive surf shop, it stocks all major surfwear brands like Quiksilver, Billabong, Hurley and Volcom, amongst many others. A large footwear section again houses all major brands, includ-
ing DC, Etnies, Vans, and Reef. While the men’s clothing range is broad, the girls’ section is perhaps more modest, but still stocks most mainstream girls’ surfwear brands such as RipCurl Girl and Roxy. For those less interested in surfing as a fashion statement and instead looking to begin or continue surfing, Sessions can supply you with the necessary apparatus to do so, allowing you to frolic in the sea, get some street-cred, and avoid the tedium of work in one fell swoop. As well as a large selection of wetsuits and wetsuit accessories from O’Neill, Billabong and Alder (plus free advice on wetsuit fitting and care), Sessions has a large stockpile of surf
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Where? Truro Average price? £35
Text Dora Eisele
and body boards from Rusty, NSP, and Manta. Unlike many surf-shops, Sessions caters for all levels of experience, so whether you’re looking for a Cortez to begin or a Spider to extend your surfboard collection, Sessions will have what you’re looking for. To top it all off, Sessions is renowned for excellent customer service. The staff are friendly and helpful, and perhaps most importantly are knowledgeable and willing to help with any surf-related queries you might have. Located in the middle of Falmouth Hight Street, there really is no need to look any further than Sessions. For details and enquiries, call 01326 211 159, or e-mail info@sessionssurfshop.com.
KIT Kit Boutique, located on Falmouth’s High Street, is part of a small chain of stores selling women’s clothing and accessories. The interior is charmingly kitsch and well-suited to the range of clothes it sells. Kit stocks mainly Motel items, a range suited to those who want something just a little bit different, yet bang on trend; the collections attract predominantly those of university age and above. Due to the size of the shop, the range of clothes is fairly limited but it is updated regularly. Items are fairly reasonably priced, but towards the
dry tends to be a little pricier than other high street clothes shops. Adding to this, they don’t offer a student discount.
Text Helen Orphin
end of term they might require saving for, once loans begin to run out. The staff are happy to order in anything that is out of stock but, whilst an individualistic shop, due to the limited number of mainstream clothing shops in Falmouth there is a chance that someone else will be wearing the a similar outfit to you. Having said this, the chances are small and arguably irrelevant when you consider the quality and allure of the clothes on offer. Without the pop music played in many shops, Kit is noticeably quieter, yet the atmos-
phere reflects the ethos. There are frequent sales, however, it should be noted that sale item or not, you can’t get your money back if you return something, only a credit note. The service is quick and friendly, operated from behind a chunky wooden table-turned-till, which has a selection of cards and wrapping paper conveniently placed for those buying presents. In short, Kit offers a pleasurable shopping experience, without the pressure associated with shopping in larger chain stores.
“MEET LOTS OF NEW PEOPLE”
DRINKS BEVERAGES YOU MAY ENCOUNTER Text Tim Gooch & Dan Butt
Spriggan’s Ale
Absinthe
Bulmers
WKD Blue
Cornish Rattler
Cornish ale from a Skinner’s beer festival, this alcoholically weak beer is all right. It has a golden colour, but is marred by a slightly stale smell – perhaps owing to the fact that students tend to leave 3.8% beer until all boozier options are exhausted. It has a particularly drinkable taste – not tipping at all towards sweet or bitter, but maintaining a Zen-like balance between the two. All in all, it’s good unless you’re aiming for inebriation.
If you’re the type who yearns to experience roughly 30% of the sensation drinking bleach gives you, then you could do a lot worse than having a shot of this. Absinthe is never really going to be a particularly tasty beverage, and this stuff in particular carries the hefty clout of 70% alcohol content. It smells comparatively harmless, but not all drinks that feel like they’re strangling you for a minute after consumption give off the insidious stench of death. In the case of poison, that’s not necessarily a good thing, but the aniseed scent of this does make it that bit more pleasurable. In fact, the initial experience is no different from Sambucca – it’s just the choking afterwards that makes it so very special. Then again, it’s unlikely you’d be drinking absinthe without the intention of getting drunk, and in this regard, it’s a particularly brilliant concoction.
It’s Summer time again, if billboards are anything to be believed, so I’m trying to replicate the airbrushed pint glass with 20 ice cubes more than necessary filled with cider. This is rather nice stuff – hints of apple, as any informed drinker may expect from a cider – which is greatly improved by ice. It’s definitely classier to drink in a park on a summer’s day than White Lightning, but the required glass and ice to make it so trendy (as opposed to warm and unappetising) make it difficult for drinking anywhere other than a pub or at home.
While many ales have the charming ‘this drink has been lovingly crafted ever since great grandpa Heathcliffe became an alcoholic’ stories printed on them, WKD has the less charismatic “SPARKLING ALCOHOLIC PREMIX BLENDING MIXED FRUIT FLAVOURS WITH TRIPLE DISTILLED VODKA… CONTAINS CAFFEINE.” On the Internet, allcapitals are the sign of either colossal stupidity or rage – coincidentally, frequent alcopop drinkers tend to display these traits quite spectacularly. The stuff smells like slush-puppy/bubblegum/whatever saccharine thing you fear, with the ungodly taste inhabiting your mouth for longer than seems strictly necessary. Being one for the older man’s drink (evidently), I don’t usually drink alcopops, so nights out on the stuff have yet to occur, but I pity anyone who ends up throwing this up. Fluorescent blue spew would only make paralytic hyperactivity seem far, far worse.
Text Paul Tucker You can’t really talk about booze in Cornwall (or the West Country in general) without cider getting a mention – it has a place in the hearts of Cornish drinkers that is almost equal to that of real ale. The most important by a country mile to those doing their drinking in the Falmouth/ Penryn area is Cornish Rattler. Described by the manufacturers as a cider (that’s ‘cyder’ in these parts) that ‘bites at 6%’, Rattler has come to define many an evening for those students that have passed through UCF and UECC. Whilst many love it, a few people love it far too much and some even claim that it makes your wee smell, you can be sure that a few too many pints of this deceptively potent tipple will definitely take your evening to unexpected places. The 2008 release of a (slightly weaker) pear version allowed those with a slightly sweeter palate to join in the action. Drink with caution, not with a chaser...
Heligan Honey (Skinner’s Brewery, Truro) Ah, Heligan Honey! “How do I love thee, let me count the ways”; this is a fine beer in almost every respect. Deeply flavoursome yet sweet and light, this is a grand hiker’s beer; what better way to relax from a day in the open air than sitting with a pint of tasty ale? Brewed using honey from the Lost Gardens of Heligan (which are well worth a visit), this ale is one of the more unusual draughts available in any self respecting Cornish hostelry, but it may be counted as one of the best. It perhaps lacks the depth and strength of the older brews on offer, but it can hold its own in any comparison of taste and lustre. In comparison to other sweet, light ales, Heligan Honey is awarded a solid five out of five stars for that luxuriant flavour. It just can’t be beat.
Doom Bar (Sharps Brewery)
Brothers Lemon Mixed Pear Cider Featuring a giant pear dwarfing a lemon on the label (which more bottles could do with), this carries on Brothers’s tradition of alcopopping cider (in a good way) by smelling strongly of lemonade. It also tastes of lemonade on an identical level. You could swap this with the soft drinks at a 7-year old’s party and no-one would be the wiser – apart from the prepubescent vomiting and hyperactive fighting that would break out. Aside from its potential immoral uses, it’s a nice cider if you have a sweet tooth. Or if you are 7, as the results
Taking its name from a treacherous sand bar off the north Cornwall coast, the only treacherous element to this fine ale is its soothing drinkability. It has a stern yet subtle flavour that makes this ale the perfect companion to food or a gentle social setting. The colour is an alluring, artistic blend of brown and light yellow, and this beer is decidedly the mellow, wisdom-dispensing uncle of the Cornish ale family. This is not a drink for the hearty slugger of lager, nor the cheeky sipper of spirits, but for the discerning drinker who appreciates that a good pint is best enjoyed at leisure in good company, with perhaps a piping hot pasty at the elbow and the pleasing promise of another fine draught to be consumed at a later hour. In the category of medium sweet, fairly dark ales, this scores four out of five stars.
Glass of Water Mainly to get the taste of several alcoholic beverages out of my mouth. Not good if you’re looking to appease a desire for alcohol, but beneficial all the same. Refreshment: 10/10 Colour: 0/10 Smell: 0/10 Taste: 0/10 Ale charm: 3/10
from an experiment suggest.
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FRESHERS GUIDE 2010
RICK STEIN’S FISH AND CHIPS Text Emma Jolly & Dora Eisele The newly-opened Rick Stein’s Fish And Chips has a lot to live up to, going by the fanfare that was given the long-awaited arrival of a celebrity chef and his famous seafood. Located at the front of seaside-colour-schemed-ever-trendier Maritime Square, the informal farmhouse-style tables and chairs create an intimate and friendly interior which, coupled with a buzzing atmosphere, means there is no need to talk in the stifled whispers that are so characteristic of many a fine-dining experience. A clean, crisp, and almost provincial colour-scheme is complimented by the panoramic view of the harbour and Maritime Square, and the classically modern chrome/ wood interior reminds you that you’re stepping into a space reserved for extravagant menus and fine dining. Indeed, the menu is exotic by any fish ‘n’ chip shop’s standards – to choose between sea bream, ray, and lemon sole (to name but a few) is perhaps the most troublesome part of the experience. An indecisive character is further challenged by the choice of battered, fried or grilled fish, all of which are exceptionally tempting, particularly judging by the jealous eyes that watch the plates as they float off to a more fortunate table. However, once your choice has been made, there is not long to wait before your dish arrives (plus a smile from the noticeably cheery and energetic staff ) which, in our case, consisted of two very meaty portions of tuna steak and monkfish. The fish is, as expected, fresh, succulent, and well-seasoned, and the peppery chargrill aroma is undeniably conducive to a watering mouth. The chips, posited far lower down the ranks of ‘Posh Food’, deserve particular credit – there are simply none like them. No need for salt, pepper or even the curry sauce that is offered. They carry an explosion of flavour with them that makes Rick Stein’s dining experience a truly repeatable one. Look in your Fresher’s Welcome Pack for a tasty surprise – a buy-one-get-one-free voucher means you can get a Rick Stein meal for a fraction of the retail price, and a continual 10% student discount is in place to ensure the students of Falmouth get their fish ‘n’ chips on a regular basis. Stein’s will also be offering a special student deal on Mondays; look out for a £7 meal deal, including fish and chips, bread and butter, and wine, or a £6 deal for the sober tea/coffee/soft drink equivalent (for more details and discounts, look out for a stall at the Fresher’s Fayre). All in all, there’s every reason to visit Rick Stein’s Fish and Chip shop for a deliciously satisfying seaside meal, accompanied by excellent service and good value for money. Prepare to be full, but hungry for more.
Recipe
RICK STEIN’S STEAMED MUSSELS WITH TOMATO AND TARRAGON 1 kg mussels 30 ml dry white wine 60 g tomatoes, peeled, deseeded and finely chopped 5g French tarragon, finely chopped 30 ml extra virgin olive oil 2 cloves garlic, finely chopped 30g unsalted butter
Make sure the mussels are tightly closed. If they are fresh-farmed ones there is no need to wash them, but if they are showing any signs of grit or sand wash them in copious amounts of cold water. Take a large saucepan, add the olive oil and garlic and soften over a medium heat for about a minute. Add the mussels or pippies, turn up the heat and add the white wine. Put a lid on the pan and cook for a few minutes until all the shells have opened, but only just. Stir the shells once or twice during the cooking to distribute them evenly. Remove and pour through a colander set over a bowl. Keep the mussels warm while you transfer the liquor to a pan, heat until boiling, whisk in the butter then add the tomato and tarragon. Check the seasoning; it’s always a good idea to leave seasoning to the end with shellfish because you never know how salty they are going to be, then add salt if necessary and freshly ground black pepper. Add the mussels back into the pan. Serve with plenty of crusty bread or alternatively with a mound of al dente linguine pasta.
Rick Stein’s Fish & Chips Rick Stein’s Seafood Bar and Stein’s Deli Discovery Quay, Falmouth www.rickstein.com
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“EXPLORE EVERYWHERE”
FRESHERS FLU Text Isabella von Aulock
It’s that never ending party that every teen yearns for after finally spreading their wings and flying the nest to start an amazing adventure. The question one could ask, is why these first few weeks at university are often so detrimental to one’s health, leaving us with that famous ‘freshers’ flu’? Shouldn’t freshers’ be an educational introduction to an independent adult life, rather than a final irresponsible and celebratory goodbye to our frivolous teenage years? For most, freshers’ will pass like a tremendous whirl wind. It will be a blur of drunken dress ups, boozy boogies, forgotten friendships, passing pulls and general amusing antics that leave us with the hangover of a life time. Personally, I remember feeling like death incarnate after two weeks of attending every possible event on the freshers’ calendar issued by FXU. I was a devout fresher, drinking every night, dancing ‘til dawn, and beginning my day in the early hours of the afternoon, only to prepare for the next event that would differ from the last
only by my new fancy dress attire. This ranged from devil, to pirate to play-boy bunny. However, even I was not starting to drink at lunch-time like many fellow freshers I met in those glorious first few days and nights in Falmouth. Studies have shown that, on average, a fresher consumes ten drinks in two and a half hours every night during these first couple of weeks. It is no wonder with this lifestyle, that freshers’ flu hits almost every fresher in the aftermath. The most common symptoms of freshers’ flu include a fever, sore throat, severe headache, coughing and general discomfort. Generally, it is caused by a poor diet, lack of sleep, and high consumption of alcohol. When two of the best weeks of our lives lead to a couple of the worst, we must be in serious need of some good advice. What can we do avoid this hangover from hell when our bodies refuse to party with us any longer? Start by trying to get as much rest and vitamin-rich food as you can,
or before you know it you’ll be straight through the doors of the same health clinic you just joined. There is no excuse to eat poorly, especially if you’re in catered accommodation. Even when you are shopping for yourself, fruit and vegetables are some of the cheapest foods you can buy. And a pint of cider doesn’t count. To help counterbalance all the drinking, remember to eat before you go out and to drink lots of water. Exercise can also really help to keep you healthier, so make use of the gym or join any sport clubs that interest you. Freshers’ flu affects 90% of students and it is certainly a price worth paying, but don’t let it get the best of you or come the start of your course you may wish you were back home.
and an archetypal student, to be accused of taking your fantastic opportunity for granted. “We never had opportunities like this when we were your age,” is a parental favourite, flung at you whenever university, gap years, or work placements, are mentioned. And, despite the aggravating frequency of the phrase, it is very true. The majority of the generation before ours did not have the opportunities that are so readily available to us. And what an opportunity we, as Falmouth and Exeter students, have. Look around you: a beautiful campus, with fantastic en-suite accommodation, around the clock security and care from a dedicated team of porters. In education: the chance to host a radio show to being a member of a drama group, to renting filmmaking equipment; Tremough Campus is not short upon resources and help from the staff and lecturers.
Penryn and Falmouth are inspirational seaside towns, promising safety, scenic settings and quirky, Cornish shops. Yet we, those privileged enough to have a wonderful experience, receiving the chance to make a career out of doing what we love, be it writing, singing or painting, are those most likely to squander it, by overusing the drinking establishments and spending days mourning the night before. This is not to say your first year shouldn’t be spent going out and enjoying yourself. On the contrary, a great part of Freshers is about going up to The Stannary dressed as a geek, a devil and a pirate, downing as many shots as your body will allow, until returning home to be violently sick in your, as yet, pristine toilet. But, amongst the madness and debauchery, try to remember that all the memories of those nights will fade away, but the product of any creative efforts or extra-curricular activities will remain.
But this we all know. As a second year at UCF, I’ve realised how useful it would have been for someone to have told me all the things I’m still struggling with even now. Catching up with work and scrounging money off my mum are two major things I wish I had been better prepared for over the first year. Whether you have an exam every week or a short essay every term, one of the first things you will learn is that any amount of work can easily catch up with you. Whether you have a week deadline or a month, there is no doubt it will be left until last minute. Preparation means that you are not rushing to complete everything by the end of term, and that work is completed to the highest standard possible. Make the most of things thrown your way – writing for the university newspaper, having a slot on RadioWave, entering work in a student competition – it all adds up and looks great on a CV. These opportunities need to be taken for granted as it’s all good practice. Money is also one of the biggest worries in university life. As boring as it sounds, a budget is a handy thing to keep, and while
spending your student loan as soon as it arrives sounds enticing, it’s something to regret when you’re living off super noodles for three months. Freshers week is a chance to splash out with fancy outfits and a line of shots, but when you fall into minus digits in your bank account, you’ll wonder where it all went. We’re all here to have a good time; to get drunk most nights of the week and hand in essays minutes before the deadline. But I’ve had friends who failed the first year, and even more that came close to it. The reason for being here in the first place must not be forgotten. Parents always say: “University is the best time of your life. The people you meet will be your friends forever.” That’s something we must keep in mind. We need to make the most of this of this opportunity, but do so without worrying about your future at University. Be prepared, be organised, and remember to gain some knowledge at the same time as those lifelong memories, because time does fly by.
These will be some of the best days of your life so party hard, but look after yourself.
TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT Text Matthew Smylie
University will prove to be an exhilarating thrill ride of dizzying drunken highs, dancing and screaming to ‘Sex on Fire’, getting off with a varying range of seemingly interesting and beautiful strangers, revelling in the freedom of a flat comprised solely of young people who are out for a good time. But it will also include dismal hanging lows, the rush to finish an essay before the 9 am deadline at 1 am that same morning, the need to purchase a weekly shop with a pound and an assortment of pennies, hunger increasing with every stomach churning moment and the conflicts that arise from living with a group of diverse and opinionated individuals. There’s no doubt that you are about to experience possibly the greatest year of your life. But, if students in years before are any benchmark, you may be susceptible to falling into the dreaded pitfall. The pitfall of complacency that causes you, as a young person
A FRESH START Text Charlie Derry
GCSEs were easy; at the time we didn’t think there could be anything harder. But in some way it has all helped us get to where we are now. A-Levels are over and gap years have finished. Now we find ourselves at Tremough Campus, beginning a new journey and taking on a course to build our futures upon. A fresh start and, for most, a new home miles away from the towns we grew up in. So why Falmouth? Falmouth is a beautiful town to live and study in, and its high population of students makes the environment even more welcoming. It’s often been described as a place of escape; a tranquil atmosphere and a place of influence that most don’t want to leave behind. “It’s a great place to start your life. UCF offered the best facilities for my course and the campus is set in such a nice environment to work in,” said Scott Pearson, 20, Level 2 Graphic Design student at UCF. “What more could you want?” The university has many experiences and opportunities to offer. There are stunning BBC standard studios and equipment; it’s not surprising that UCF has gained some well-deserved recognition over the years.
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.org.u k/bur ma
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FREE
*
Collection or Delivery. Available on large or medium pizzas only. *Second Pizza must be of equal or lesser value than the first. Not valid with any other offer. Please mention offer when ordering. Please present coupon with payment on delivery or collection. Offer expires: 30/06/11.
50
%
OFF
When your order is £30 or over.
Collection or Delivery. Not valid with any other offer. Excludes ice cream. Please mention offer when ordering. Please present coupon with payment on delivery or collection. Subs charged at regular price £3.49 on this coupon. Offer expires 30/06/11.
50
%
OFF
When your order is £30 or over.
Collection or Delivery. Not valid with any other offer. Excludes ice cream. Please mention offer when ordering. Please present coupon with payment on delivery or collection. Subs charged at regular price £3.49 on this coupon. Offer expires 30/06/11.
40 Killigrew Street/9 The Moor, Falmouth, Cornwall TR11 3PP
Tel: (01326) 31 13 13 Opening Hours: 10am – late 7 days a week.
Join us at Domino’s Pizza Falmouth for special offers and news
We’re OPEN for lunch! Copyright 2010, Domino’s Pizza Group Limited. All trade marks are registered in the names of Domino’s Pizza Group Limited and/or Domino’s PMC Inc. Used under licence by DPGL.
DH00614_Falmouth Guide Ad New Size.indd 1
47
10/9/10 15:49:29
ADVERT great tasting bakerY treats are just around the corner
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10% DISCOUNT
FOR STUDEN
TS
on presenta tio a valid stude n of nt card