NHS Ayrshire Community Bereavement Booklet

We wish to thank the advertisers and sponsors, without whom this publication would not have been possible.

Please note, however, NHS Ayrshire and Arran does not endorse any of the products or services which are provided by any of these particular advertisers and sponsors.

The information within this booklet is correct at the time of printing, however it may change in time.

Reference: NHS Ayrshire and Arran Community Bereavement Guide Publication Date: April 2024

Practical guidance on registering a death

When someone close to you dies, you may be unsure of what to do. We hope this booklet will help you through the first few days.

What do I need to do first?

• You will need to tell close family and friends what has happened.

• You will obtain a completed death certificate. This is sometimes called the ‘Medical Certificate of Cause of Death’ (MCCD) or ‘Form 11’ from the doctor.

• The MCCD will need to have been completed in order to do this. Currently, the MCCD will be sent from the Hospital to the registrars. Should this be different, the Hospital will advise you.

• You should think about the funeral. If you wish, you can contact a funeral director before you register the death. It is best not to delay making contact with the funeral director.

• You should try to find the Will of the person who has died. If you can’t find it, check if a lawyer holds a copy.

When and how do I register the death?

• The death of someone close can be overwhelming and you may need help to do all these things. Relatives, friends or neighbours can support you.

• A priest, minister or religious leader may also be able to help you or tell you where you can find help.

• You can get advice from the Chaplaincy service at the hospital, a funeral director, your family doctor (GP) or a solicitor. Some organisations for example, Citizen’s Advice Scotland may also be able to help.

• You must register the death within eight days. You can do this at any Registrar’s Office in Scotland.

• You may need to make an appointment to register a death, so you should telephone the Registrar’s Office.

• You can find the contact details of local Registrars’ Offices at the back of this booklet, in the telephone book or online at www.gro-scotland.gov.uk.

Who can register the death?

• A close relative or partner would normally register the death. An executor, someone who was present at the death, or the occupier of the property where the person died can also register the death.

• However, anyone can register the death as long as they have the information that is needed. So if you feel too upset, you can ask someone else to do this.

What documents do I need?

To register the death, you will need the ‘Medical Certificate of Cause of Death’. It is helpful if you can also take:

• The person’s birth certificate and marriage or civil partnership certificate(s)

• Their NHS medical card and any documents about a state pension or any social security benefits.

Don’t worry if you don’t have all these documents. The Registrar will still be able to register the death.

What details do I need to bring?

Details needed for registration:

• Full name, occupation, postal address of the deceased person and their date and country of birth.

• If the deceased was a married man, widower or divorced, the full name of his wife or former wife.

• If the deceased was a married woman, a widow or divorced, the full name and occupation of her husband or former husband.

• If the deceased has been married more than once, particulars of previous spouses are also required.

• If the deceased had a civil partner, or had previously been in a civil partnership, the details of the civil partner.

• If the deceased was in a relationship at the date of death, the date of birth of the surviving widow, widower or partner.

• The full name and occupation of the deceased person’s father and the full name and maiden surname of the deceased’s mother.

• The name and address of the deceased’s own doctor.

What does a review of the ‘Medical Certificate of Cause of Death’ involve?

A national review system of the ‘Medical Certificate of Cause of Death’ provides independent checks on the quality and accuracy of such certificates. All deaths not referred to the Procurator Fiscal or relating to a still birth will be subject to random selection for review by Health Information Scotland medical reviewers, an organisation independent of NHS Ayrshire and Arran.

What form will the reviews take?

There will be two main categories of review:

Level one review

• Expected to be completed in one working day.

• Will apply to about 10% of non-Fiscal or still birth deaths.

Level two review

• Expected to be completed in three working days.

• Will apply to approximately 1,000 deaths a year (Scotland-wide).

What does that mean for me?

• The doctor who certifies the death will explain the content of the ‘Medical Certificate of Cause of Death’ to you. You can ask questions of the doctor or nurse.

• If the death is not a still birth of a baby or a sudden death which involves referral to the Procurator Fiscal, you may be advised that the certificate has been selected for a random review when you take it to the registrar. You do not have to do anything at this point.

• The review relates to the quality and accuracy of the ‘Medical Certificate of Cause of Death’ and involves the independent medical reviewers contacting the certifying doctor. The registrar will contact you as soon as the review has taken place to allow you to proceed to the Certificate of Registration of Death (Form 14) and then to arrange the funeral.

• You need not delay in contacting a funeral director even if a review is taking place. The time of the funeral cannot, however, be confirmed until the form 14 has been issued.

(Please see flow chart on page 10)

What will the registrar give me?

When you register the death, the registrar will give you a number of documents, free of charge:

• A certificate of registration of death (Form 14). You should give this to your funeral director.

• A green social security registration or notification of death certificate (From 334/S1). You will need this if the person who dies received a state pension or any social security benefits.

• A shortened version of the death certificate.

You can also buy copies of the full death certificate. Some organisations may ask for this, for example, insurance companies or banks. There is a charge of £12 per certificate. Urgent copies cost £15 per certificate.

For more information, go to the National Records of Scotland’s website www.nrscotland.gov.uk or ask someone at the local Registrar’s Office. There is a list of local Registrars’ Offices throughout Ayrshire, Arran and Bute at the back of this booklet. Remember, you have to telephone in advance to make an appointment before you can register a death.

Tell Us Once

In all parts of Ayrshire, Arran and Bute a service called ‘Tell Us Once’ can help you inform government agencies about a death. The Registrar will give you the details you need for this. Through ‘Tell Us Once’, information is passed securely and in confidence to the Department for Work and Pensions (DWP) in the first instance, which can then be passed onto other government departments and council services.

The information is then used to update records, amend service provision accordingly and calculate any changes to finances such as benefits and tax.

Services and organisations involved include:

• Council - housing benefit, council tax benefit, council tax, council payments, libraries, electoral service, blue badges, adult services, children’s services and housing.

• Driver and Vehicle Licensing Agency (DVLA).

• Department of Work and Pensions (DWP) - pension, disability and carers service, Jobcentre Plus and overseas health team.

• HM Revenue and Customs - child benefit, child tax credit and working tax credit, personal taxation.

• Ministry of Defence - war pensions scheme identity and passport service.

Stopping Junk Mail to the recently deceased.

If someone you know has died, the amount of unwanted marketing post being sent to them can be greatly reduced which helps to stop painful daily reminders.

By registering with the free service www.stopmail.co.uk the names and addresses of the deceased are removed from mailing lists, stopping most advertising mail within as little as six weeks. If you cannot access the internet you can call 0808 168 9607, where you will be asked for very simple information that will take only a few minutes to complete. Alternatively, ask the bereavement team for a leaflet that can be returned in the post.

This free of charge service provided by the Bereavement Support Network will not only actively reduce the unwanted marketing mail but also can help reduce the likelihood of identity theft following the death of someone close. The information is not used for any other purpose and you only have to complete this once. Additionally to ‘Stop Mail’ a comparable service can also be accessed from the Bereavement Register or Deceased Preference Service if you would prefer to use them.

Death occurs

The MCCD can be completed by a certifying doctor and the information is transferred to NRS and the selection process may begin at this point

or

Family attend Registrar's office

MCCD is randomly selected for review

Yes

Death is reported to the Procurator Fiscal

Case selected for level 1 review (normally completed within 1 working day) 10%

No

Death is registered Certi cate of Registration of Death (Form 14) is issued

Case selected for level 2 review (normally completed within 3 working days) approximately 1,000 deaths per year

Funeral can now take place

How to organise a funeral

How do I arrange a funeral?

• You can speak to a funeral director as soon as you feel ready.

• You do not have to wait until the ‘Medical Certificate of Cause of Death’ is completed or the death has been registered before you contact a funeral director. You do, however, have to register the death and receive Form 14 before you make the final arrangements for the funeral.

• Do not feel you have to rush. Taking your time may make planning the funeral easier and the exact date of the service will probably be decided by factors outside your control, for example, the availability of the funeral director, minister, crematorium or cemetery and the completion of any review of the ‘MCCD’.

• You can find the contact details for local funeral directors at the back of this booklet and in the telephone book.

• You do not have to use a funeral director, although most people find this helpful.

• If you wish to make some arrangements yourself, the ‘Natural Death Centre’ can provide support and information.

The Scottish Government has released a leaflet entitled ‘Arranging a Funeral?’ which provides advice and includes a note of useful publications and contacts when making funeral arrangements. This can be found on the Scottish Government website and gives much general information and other sources of help.

How do I plan the funeral?

It might help if you consider a few questions:

1. Did the person who died make any requests or leave instructions for their funeral?

2. Who should be involved in planning the funeral? You could speak to family and friends about this.

3. Will it be a burial or cremation? Where will it take place?

4. Who will conduct the ceremony? If the person died in hospital, the Chaplaincy service can give you advice and support, or put you in touch with representatives of religious and non-religious organisations.

5. Will you put a death notice in any newspaper? What would you like it to say? It can help to think about this before you meet with the funeral director, who will handle this for you.

You can ask a funeral director for advice on all matters. You can find a list of all funeral directors in Ayrshire and Arran and Bute in this booklet.

How to pay for the funeral

Funeral costs vary and you may wish to ask several funeral directors about the service they provide.

Funeral directors should explain their costs and give you a written estimate. Before meeting the funeral director, you should try to think about how to pay for the funeral.

1. Find out if the person who died:

• Made arrangements to pay for the funeral for example, with a life assurance policy or a prepaid funeral plan.

• Left enough money to pay for the funeral. Funeral costs have first claim on any remaining estate.

2. If no money is available and you get benefits or tax credits, you may be able to apply for a ‘Funeral payment’ from the Social Fund. You should:

• Ask someone at your local Jobcentre Plus if you qualify for this or call the Department of Work and Pensions on 0800 731 0469.

• Tell the funeral director as soon as possible if you want to apply.

3. If your wife, husband or civil partner has died you may be able to apply for a benefit called a ‘Bereavement payment’. You should ask at the local Jobcentre Plus if you qualify for this or call the Department of Work and Pensions.

4. You can find out more about this on the ‘Bereavement payment’ section on the www.direct.gov website.

The ‘Funeral payment’ and ‘Bereavement payment’ are subject to conditions and you should not assume you are eligible.

If no one is able to arrange and pay for the funeral, the local council may be able to.

Funeral directors

Funeral directors in East Ayrshire

Auchinleck

Alexander Muir

Cumnock

Cumnock Funeral Care

Fosters

George Telfer

Samuel Kerr

Dalmellington

Samuel Kerr

Darvel

185 Main Street KA18 2BA 01290 338248

44 Glaisnock Street Cumnock, KA18 1BY 01290 423628

107 Glaisnock Street Cumnock, KA18 1JP

105 Glaisnock Street Cumnock, KA18 1JP

93 Glaisnock Street Cumnock, KA18 1JP

0800 121 8090

01290 421946

01290 429077

40 Main Street

Dalmellington, KA6 7DL 01292 551900

Thomas McKellar & Sons 3-5 West Main Street, Darvel KA17 0DT 01560 429239

Galston

Thomas McKellar & Sons 8 Polwarth Street Galston, KA4 8HG 01563 624025

Hurlford

Kilmarnock & District Independent 4 Mauchline Road Hurlford, KA1 5BZ

Kilmarnock

Ayrshire Simple Funerals

Co-operative Funeral Care (Kilmarnock)

Fosters

01563 551500

2 Montgomery Place Kilmarnock, KA3 1JB 01563 535222

118 John Finnie Street Kilmarnock, KA1 1BB 01563 521557

96 - 106 Portland Street Kilmarnock, KA3 1AA 01563 608108

Kilmarnock & District

Independent

Portland Funeral Service

Thomas McKellar & Sons

Mauchline

Wilson & Drury

Newmilns

James Dykes

New Cumnock

Alexander Muir

Patna

Barry Whalen

Stewarton

The Old High Kirk, Church Street KA3 1AA 01563 543122

6 Union Street

Kilmarnock, KA3 1AW 01563 534103

96 Titchfield Street

Kilmarnock, KA1 1PH 01563 572565

11 Kilmarnock Road Mauchline, KA5 5DB 01290 518282

85 Main Street, Newmilns, KA16 9DG 01560 318058

7-9 Mossmark New Cumnock, KA18 4NF 01290 338248

27 Dalvennan Avenue Patna, KA6 7NA 01292 531400

Thomas McKellar & Sons 2 Main Street Stewarton, KA3 5AE 01560 485366

Funeral directors in North Ayrshire

Ardrossan A & I Inglis 48 Princes Street, Ardrossan KA22 8DF

Beith

Co-operative Funeral Care

Robert Rarity

537900

31 Eglinton Street Beith, KA15 1AB 01505 502106

44 Main Street, Beith, KA15 2AA 01505 502323

Dalry

Co-operative Funeral Care

Robert Rarity

36 Sharon Street Dalry, KA24 5DT 23 Main Street Daltry KA24 5DP

Irvine A & I Inglis 54 Townhead Irvine, KA12 0BE

Balmoral Funeral Directors

Townhead, Irvine, KA12 0BN

Bennetts 64a Ayr Road Irvine, KA12 8DL

Co-op Funeral Care 16 Quarry Road Irvine, KA12 0TQ

Kevin T Blades & Son 166 High Street, Irvine, KA12 8AN

832426 01294 832830

277377

278777

273939

274671

313402

RB Steele 5 Ballot Road Irvine, KA12 0HW 01294 273236

Isle of Arran

DB Hendry

Glen Avenue Brodick, KA27 8DQ

Kilbirnie Bennetts 7-9 Townhead, Kilbirnie, KA25 7AZ

302233

683787 Co-operative Funeral Care (DB Hendry)

KA25 7BX

Co-operative Funeral Care

RB Steele

KA13 7HD

Station Plaza

KA13 6LB

Byres Road Kilwinning, KA13 6JU

683787

542651

552565

Largs

Campbell Smith

34 Castle Park Drive

Largs, KA29 0DG 01475 568435

Paul Stevenson 3 Lade Street Largs, KA30 8AZ 01475 670555

Robert Rarity

39-41 Wilson Street Largs, KA30 9AQ 01475 670031

William Tyre 7/11 Gallowgate Lane Largs, KA30 8BE 01475 673133

Saltcoats

AW Blair

2 Seabank Street Saltcoats, KA21 5JF 01294 468238

Paul Stevenson 29 Chapelwell Street Saltcoats, KA21 5EB 01294 607001

William Tyre 2 Winton Street Saltcoats, KA21 5BN 01294 677487

West Kilbride

William Wallace & Son 2 Hunterston Road West Kilbride, KA23 9EX 01294 822114

Funeral directors in Bute

Ayr

Funeral directors in South Ayrshire

Armours Funeral Service

Barry Whalen

99 Main Street Ayr, KA8 8BU 01292 286113

3 River Terrace Ayr, KA8 0BJ 01292 611148

Co-operative Funeral Care 7 Crown Street Ayr, KA8 8BY 01292 264149

Fosters

M L Williams

2-6 Burns Statue Square, Ayr, KA7 1UP 0800 121 8090

Falkland Park Road Ayr, KA8 8LL 01292 427465

Peter Wilson & Son 79 Prestwick Road Ayr, KA8 8LH 01292 427862

Dailly

A McWhirter & Sons Loanen Lea, Dailly, KA26 9SH 01465 811232

Girvan

Co-operative Funeral Care 10-12 Dalrymple Street Girvan, KA26 9AE 01465 712361

J & J Lindsay 115-117 Wilson Street Girvan, KA26 9AR 01465 712145

Maybole

Co-operative Funeral Care 39 Cassillis Road Maybole, KA19 7HF 01655 882127

Prestwick

Bennetts 24 The Cross Prestwick, KA9 1AL 01292 477800

Co-operative Funeral Care 1 St Quivox Road Prestwick, KA9 1LJ 01292 476604

Troon

Armours Funeral Service

Co-operative Funeral Care

Templehill Funeral Service

33 Templehill Troon, KA10 6BQ

51-53 Templehill Troon, KA10 6BQ

115 Templehill Troon, KA10 6BQ

01292 311800

01292 317077

01292 316164

Registrars’ Offices in Ayrshire, Arran and Bute

Remember you need to make an appointment to register a death. At the time of writing, registration appointments are by telephone.

Registrars’ Offices in East Ayrshire

Cumnock

Kilmarnock

Irvine

Isle of Arran

Kilbirnie

Rothesay House 1 Greenholm Road

Cumnock

KA18 1LH

Burns Monument Centre, Kay Park

Kilmarnock

KA3 7RU

01563 576695/6

Mon – Thurs: 9am – 5pm Fri: 9am – 4pm

01563 576695/6

Mon – Thurs: 9am – 5pm Fri: 9am – 4pm

Registrars’ Offices in North Ayrshire

Customer Service Centre

Bridgegate House

Irvine

KA12 8BD

Council Offices

Lamlash

Isle of Arran

KA27 8JY

Kilbirnie Branch Library

Avils Place

Kilbirnie KA25 6BL

01294 310000

Mon – Thurs: 9am – 4.45pm Fri: 9am – 4.30pm

01770 600338

Mon – Thurs: 9am – 4.45pm Fri: 9am – 4.30pm

01294 310000

Mon – Thurs: 9am – 4.45pm Fri: 9am – 4.30pm

Largs

Saltcoats

Brooksby Medical and Resource Centre

31 Brisbane Road

Largs

KA30 8LH

Saltcoats Town Hall

Countess Street

Saltcoats KA21 5HE

01294 310000

Mon – Thurs: 9am – 4.45pm Fri: 9am – 4.30pm

01294 310000

Mon – Thurs: 9am – 4.45pm Fri: 9am – 4.30pm

Registrars’ Offices in South Ayrshire

Mon, Tues and Thurs 8.45am – 4.45pm Wed 10am – 4.45pm Fri 8.45am – 4pm Closed for lunch: 12.30pm – 1.30pm

Girvan

Council Offices

17-19 Knockcushan Street

Girvan KA26 9AQ

01292 617617

Mon, Tues and Thurs 8.45am – 4.45pm Wed 10am – 4.45pm Fri 8.45am – 4pm

Registrars’ Offices in Isle of Bute

Rothesay Office

Council Offices, Mount Pleasant Road, Rothesay, PA20 9HQ

01546 605521 (Option 8)

Checklist of who to tell about the death

Bank, building society or insurance companies

Lawyer

Landlord or housing provider If in rented accommodation

Employer or Trades Union

Pension provider

Utility suppliers

Telephone provider

Family doctor (GP), dentist, optician Cancel future appointments

Unused medicines Return to community pharmacist

Clubs and associations Cancel membership

Libraries Return any books, cancel membership

Blue Badge Return to Social Work Department

Bus / rail travel companies Cancel pass

Passport Agency Return passport

Ways to help someone who has been bereaved

• Be present and attentive to the bereaved person.

• Allow for moments of silence and reflection.

• Listen in a non-judgemental and accepting way.

• Avoid the use of clichés such as ‘Think of all the good times’, ‘You can always have another child’.

• Mention the deceased person’s name and encourage the bereaved person to talk about them.

• Offer practical and emotional support, for example, by looking after children or cooking a meal.

• Understanding that tears are normal and a healthy part of the grieving process.

• Don’t try to fill in conversations with a lot of outside news.

• Remember that grief may take years to work through.

• Acknowledge anniversaries and dates of significance for the bereaved person.

These are some websites which provide support in bereavement.

NHS inform Bereavement Zone

www.nhsinform.scot/ bereavement

The Bereavement Zone can help you find answers to your questions and guide you through the early days of your bereavement. It can also help you understand more of the experience of loss in the days that lie ahead.

Good Life, Good Death, Good Grief

www.goodlifedeathgrief.org.uk Telephone: 0131 272 2735

Good Life, Good Death, Good Grief is working to make Scotland a place where there is more openness about death, dying and bereavement so that:

• People are aware of ways to live with death, dying and bereavement.

• People feel better equipped to support each other through the difficult times that can come with death, dying and bereavement. Cruse Bereavement Care Scotland www.crusescotland.org.uk

SOBS - Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide

Scottish Association for Mental Health (SAMH)

Calman Cancer Support Centre

Maggie’s Centres

Bereavement Support

www.uksobs.org

www.samh.org.uk

www.cancersupportscotland.org

www.maggiescentres.org/ how-maggies-can-help

Miscarriage Association www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk

Sudden - Supporting people after sudden death

SANDS Stillbirth and neonatal death charity

The Compassionate Friends - Dealing with the death of a child

British Heart Foundation

Bereavement Support

Children’s Hospice Association Scotland (CHAS)

Winston’s Wish - the charity for bereaved children

www.sudden.org

www.sands.org.uk

www.tcf.org.uk

www.bhf.org.uk/information support/publications/caring-andbereavement-publications

www.chas.org.uk

www.winstonswish.org

Child Bereavement UK www.childbereavement.org

The Board would like to thank RNS Publications for publishing this information and the following pages contain some features from services o ering their help at this time.

Whilst the Board is grateful of their support it does not endorse or recommend any of the services that they provide.

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stopping mail

STOPPING JUNK MAIL

It is distressing to deal with a bereavement and unsolicited mail can be insensitive and destructive during a grieving process.

By scanning the below QR code on your phone or visiting www.stopmail.co.uk, we are able to securely share this information with mailing organisations and under the Data Protection Act the information will not be used for any other purpose.

Other benefits reduce the possibility of identity fraud, such as assumed identity and you will only have to supply the information once.

This publication has been jointly developed between ourselves and the hospital. We hope that it has been or will be of help at this time and we welcome any comments or suggestions that you may have.

Please contact us either by phone, email or by post.