Live Love and Eat

LIVE LOVE AND EAT Health|Wellbeing|Nutrition

BACK TO SCHOOL, HEALTHY EATING ON THE GO One energetic change to attract more money Hearing Loss and cognitive skills at any age. My personal experience Meet our Spotlight

Greta M. Kephart

FEEDING YOUR TODDLER AND PRE-SCHOOL CHILD The Healing Powers of gathering with friends

ISSUE 65|AUGUST 2021/ ISSN 2689-7741

GIVE ME WONDER The Right Place

Healthy boundaries -Where to draw the line

Creating a sustainable health journey HOW TO NAVIGATE SOCIAL FOOD + BODY IMAGE ANXIETY The Divorced Woman’s Guide™...to learning the art of relaxation Journey through the planets - Part III, The social planets

Live Love and Eat Edition Copyright © 2021 Bernadine Otto/ Live Love and Eat All rights reserved.

ISBN: 9781300585077

LIVE LOVE AND EAT

CONTENTS 65

HEALTH & NUTRITION & WELLBEING

03 EDITOR'S NOTE 04 MEET THE CONTRIBUTORS 06 HEALTHY EATING ON THE GO 15 ONE ENERGETIC CHANGE TO

ATTRACT MORE MONEY 21 HEARING LOSS AND COGNITIVE SKILLS AT ANY AGE. MY PERSONAL STORY 28 FEEDING YOUR TODDLER + PRESCHOOL CHILD

THE DIVORCED WOMAN’S GUIDE™ TO LEARNING THE ART OF RELAXATION

11

39

EXCLUSIVE!

THE HEALING POWERS OF GATHERING WITH FRIENDS

44 HEALTHY BOUNDARIES - WHERE TO DRAW THE LINE

47 CREATING A SUSTAINABLE HEALTH JOURNEY

MEET OUR SPOTLIGHT

GIVE ME WONDER

Greta. H. Kephart. Read all about what wonderful work she is doing in the world

Copyright © 2021 Bernadine Otto. All rights reserved.

Published by Live Love and Eat

PART III. THE SOCIAL PLANETS

68 HOW TO NAVIGATE SOCIAL FOOD + BODY IMAGE ANXIETY 87 THE RIGHT PLACE

90 AUGUST POEMS 4497 WYNDTREE DRIVE, WEST CHESTER, OHIO, 45069 513 2758081 BERNADINE@LIVELOVEANDEATMAGAZINE.COM WWW.LIVELOVEANDEATMAGAZINE.COM

AUGUST 2021 | ISSUE 65

42

55 JOURNEY THROUGH THE PLANETS -

CONTACT US LIVE LOVE AND EAT 4497 Wyndtree Drive #212 West Chester Ohio 45069 513 2758081 bernadine@liveloveandeatmagazine.com www.liveloveandeatmagazine.com

NOTE FROM EDITOR New Stories, New writers It is the Month of August.

I cannot believe we are in August already. It is time for the kids to go to school and one of the biggest struggles that most people face today is a hectic schedule.

We’re so busy that it makes eating healthy a real challenge. Quick and convenient foods end up taking the place of healthy, nourishing food when we’re on the go, go, go all the time. These less-than-ideal food choices put us on the hamster wheel of experiencing low energy, weight gain, and potential health problems.

EDITORIAL BERNADINE OTTO Editor-In-Chief

SUBSCRIPTIONS SUBSCRIBE ONLINE https://www.liveloveandeatmagazine.co m/order-your-copy

What if I told you it didn’t have to be this way? You don’t have to be a slave to your schedule and resort to fast food or processed foods on a regular basis. It’s possible to eat healthy foods, even with a jampacked schedule. It just requires a little bit of pre-planning to ensure success. You’ll feel better, have more energy, and your waistline will thank you too.

Be sure to read our guide on eating healthy on the go.

If it is your health, fitness, or goals we have you covered.

Kick back, relax and soak up some quality time with Live Love and Eat Enjoy the month of August

We hope that you enjoy this issue.

BERNADINE OTTO Editor-In-Chief

https://organicbasics.pxf.io/c/2699575/1015321/12803

MEET OUR CONTRIBUTORS 4497 Wyndtree Drive , West Chester 45069 513 275 8081 | bernadine@liveloveandeatmagazine.com

Managing Editor Bernadine Otto Contributor Wendy Sterling Contributor Jace Jacobs

Bernadine Otto

Wendy Sterling

Lori Booty

Kim Klein

Jace Jacobs

Victoria Kleinsman

Contributor Victoria Kleinsman

Contributor Lori Booty Contributor

Contributor

Contributor

Contributor

Kim Klein Skylar Snow Poetry

Skylar Snow Poetry

Judy Brown

Linda Watson

Sherry Parks

Curt Lewis Linda Watson

Contributor Sherry Parks Contributor Sharon Clare

Curt Lewis

Tracy Markley

Contributor Tracy Markley Recipes Bernadine Otto Debra Letchworth Spotlight Greta M. Kephart Sharon Clare

Greta M .

Kephart

Debra Letchworth

ADVERTISE IN LIVE LOVE AND EAT Email: bernadine@liveloveandeatmagazine.com

DOG DAYS SUMMER The Dog Days Summer is the hottest and steamiest part of summer. Typically, this is the period when Sirius, the Dog Star, rises at the same time as the Sun, from July 3 -August 11. When the Dog Days of Summer arrive, it's time to do those memorable summertime activities, that help us to keep our cool. They include: Take a dip in the pool, Go to the beach, take the kids to a water park

FRIENDSHIP DAY Friendship Day is a day to nurture relationships, new and old. It's a really easy and fun day to celebrate.

Start the day by getting in touch with some old friends.

National Dog Day is on August 26th, his day is intended to honor dogs for all that they do for us. In addition to giving love and companionship, dogs help us out in countless ways.

NATIONAL WATERMELON DAY August 3, This big and juicy fruit deserves its own big day. So, we give pause to celebrate watermelons on National Watermelon Day. Sweet and tasty, watermelons, are one of summer's favorite fruit. It's standard fare at picnics. While watermelon is over 90% water, it sure tastes good.

HEALTHY EATING ON THE GO

BY BERNADINE OTTO

How to fuel your body for better health and more energy even when you have a crazy busy schedule.

One of the biggest struggles that most people face today is a hectic schedule.

We’re so busy that it makes eating healthy a real challenge. Quick and convenient foods end up taking the place of healthy, nourishing food when we’re on the go, go, go all the time. These less-than-ideal food choices put us on the hamster wheel of experiencing low energy, weight gain, and potential health problems.

What if I told you it didn’t have to be this way? You don’t have to be a slave to your schedule and resort to fast food or processed foods on a regular basis.

It’s possible to eat healthy foods, even with a jampacked schedule. It just requires a little bit of preplanning to ensure success. You’ll feel better, have more energy, and your waistline will thank you too.

When you start fueling your body with healthier choices, you’ll probably also find that you do have that 3 PM slump or need that afternoon caffeine boost.

(These are a couple of added benefits many of my client's experience, and they’re always pleasantly surprised).

I’ve included a list of healthy snack ideas to get you started, so keep reading.

Eating healthy when You’re Not Home There are plenty of circumstances that will take you away from home, and make it more challenging to eat healthy food. Take the time to plan ahead and you can relax knowing that you won’t be derailing your healthy living efforts by consuming empty calories that only make you hungry again a short time later.

Daily Errands and/or Kid’s Activities Most of us spend several hours in our vehicles every week running errands, stuck in traffic, or shuttling kids back and forth between activities. If we don’t plan ahead, it is easy to fall into the trap of swinging through the closest drive-through when you (or your family) are hungry. Don’t wait until the point that you’re starving to make food choices, as this will almost always lead to bad decisions. Instead, plan ahead, so you don’t have to rely on your willpower alone to keep you on track. Pack easy-to-carry healthy snacks, and keep them in either your purse or your vehicle. This way you always have healthy choices right at your fingertips.

Road Trips Just because you’re on vacation, doesn’t mean you should take a total hiatus from your health goals. You can still live a healthy lifestyle on road trips by packing healthy foods to eat in the car. You can pack a cooler to keep handy so you have easy access to snacks while on the road. If you’re planning on stopping at rest areas along the way, pack a nutritious picnic lunch to eat before you head back out on the next leg of your trip.

Airports Even though you can’t pack liquids in your carry-on bag, there are still plenty of options for what you can bring. You can pack wrapped whole food snack bars, nuts, seeds, or even pieces of fruit in your personal items bag. With a little creative planning, you can keep your nutrition on track, and save yourself a bundle of money you would have otherwise spent on pricey (and often unhealthy) airport food and snacks.

Foods That Are Easy to Pack The following items are all easy to prepare, and convenient to take on the go. Feel free to experiment, and find out which snacks best fit your preference and lifestyle. Mix and match options to see what works for you. Be sure to keep any perishable foods in a cooler or use an ice pack.

Baby carrots and cucumber slices with hummus. Sliced or whole apples with nut butter or sun butter Clementine or mandarinoranges Grapes Sliced or whole pears. Smoothie (if you plan to drink it within 30 mins or so), Nuts and raisins (you can make your own trail mix)

Pumpkin seeds (pepitas)and/or sunflower seeds. Whole Food Snack Bars (such as Larabar).

Sandwiches or wraps

String cheese or cheese cubes, High quality beef jerky

Cut-up rotisserie chicken (keep cool with an ice pack). Hard boiled eggs

Make the Most of Technology Almost everyone has a smartphone with them at any given time. You can use this readily available technology to your advantage. Keep your food choices healthy when you’re on the go by utilizing apps that make healthy living easier.

“Healthy Out” is a handy app to keep your nutrition on track when eating out. You can search by tags like meals under 500 calories, paleo, heart-healthy, and more. Download the app for iOS or Android to find restaurant meals that fit your needs. If anyone in your family is gluten-intolerant, it may be a challenge to find restaurants that serve gluten-free meals. You can use the app called “Find Me Gluten Free” to help find restaurants with gluten-free offerings in your vicinity.

Make Midweek Meals Easy Just because you have had a busy day doesn’t mean you have to resort to fast food or processed foods for dinner.

With a little forethought, you can make sure your family has healthy meals ready to go when you walk in the door.

With the advent of Pinterest, you now have thousands of healthy crockpot meal ideas available for free. Do a quick search and see what recipes may interest you and your family. If you prep everything the night before, or even earlier in the morning, you can come home to a delicious home-cooked meal that is ready to serve.

TIME SAVER TIP: Batch cook and plan for leftovers. When you do have time to cook, simply double the recipe and set the extras aside to use later in the week on a particularly busy day. It takes very little extra effort to double the recipe, and you will reap the benefits of time savings later in the week.

Make Healthy Eating Strategies Work for You Even with a busy schedule, you can still make sure that you are eating healthy, nutritious meals. By putting in a little bit of planning, you can ensure that you and your family enjoy healthy foods that support your lifestyle and your goals.

You can do this! Let me know if I can help.

Bernadine Otto is a Certified Transformational Nutrition Coach & an EFT Practitioner and the Managing editor of The Live, Love and Eat Magazine. She helps women to make peace with food, cravings, and emotional eating by using a technique called The EFT Tapping Method for Weight Loss and Cravings. She also works with women who are tired of dieting, and women who have a negative body image. My approach is not to focus on calories or the scale but to find the root cause so my clients can have a happy, healthy life that they deserve. https://www.bernadineisthebodyshrink.com/

GRETA M. KEPHART Personal trainer, health coach, fitness nutritionist, weight management specialist

'''I teach clients the importance of balance in everything. Weights and cardio, healthy meals and treat meals, high-intensity days, and rest days. My motto is “everything in moderation” to avoid boredom and binging''

You can learn more about Greta here: E-mail: Gretbags2003@hotmail.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/gretagoyh

How did you get started in your career? In What Year?

I got started after overcoming my own health struggles. I had gained 20lbs in stress weight, was dealing with mental health issues, had very little energy, and had poor sleep. I began using the products I now promote and joined the company to share my story and help others. I earned my certs between 2017-2021.

Since then, I have been able to help many both online and in-person with their fitness and nutrition journeys.

Who or what has been your greatest professional inspiration and why?

My greatest professional inspiration would have to be my best friend, Vickie AKA “My Lobster”. She supported me through my darkest times and has always been a pillar of strength and grace. Vickie is someone who exemplifies hard work, dedication, and a “not going to give up” attitude. She has always encouraged me to learn and grow and be the best version of myself.

What advice would you offer to someone starting out in your industry?

The advice I always give is to stay present! Get loud and proud about what you do and share it! People are looking for professionals like us and aren’t always sure where to go. We need to put ourselves out there and show what we have to offer.

What professional challenges have you faced that have contributed to your overall success?

So many challenges! I have gone through a divorce, financial hardship, legal battles, all of which made me better equipped to handle struggle. I overcame these by staying focused on my “why” and not getting distracted by the things that could derail me.

Are there any specific contributions, you have made in your field which contributed to your success? (i.e. inventions/patents. Books authored or co-authored, etc.)

My biggest contribution to this field is sharing my knowledge and ensuring people know I’m available to assist them. That’s what most people are looking for today; someone to hear them and offer a solution.

What do you do in your free time (volunteer, work, hobbies, etc.)

My free time includes reading, exercising, travel, time spent with Cosmo, and sharing the opportunity with my company.

What would you like readers to know about you and why?

Things about me: I LOVE sharks and am a huge advocate for them, especially with regards to the shark finning trade.

I love music in all forms, Motown being my favorite genre! Weight training is my niche in this space and I feel it’s so important to break the stigma of females lifting weights.

What is your favorite quote and why?

“If you're serious about changing your life, you'll find a way. If you're not, you'll find an excuse.” ― Jen Sincero.

This quote is from my favorite author. When I read “You Are a Bad-Ass”, it lit me up inside. I believe this quote is the epitome of what choices can do for us and how we need to really step outside the comfort zone to see real growth.

What 3 tips will you give someone who is struggling to live healthy?

Get a coach! Find someone who is credible in the field.

Seek out those who have had success and kept it.

Don’t focus on the scale; focus on how you’re feeling; the goal is sustainability and lifestyle change.

What kind of legacy would you like to leave the world?

I want to leave this world knowing I worked myself out of a job; meaning I armed my clients with enough knowledge, confidence, and attitude that they can carry through life.

What is your preferred method of training?

I teach clients the importance of balance in everything. Weights and cardio, healthy meals and treat meals, high-intensity days, and rest days. My motto is “everything in moderation” to avoid boredom and binging.

What is your most rewarding experience thus far in the field?

Any time a client hits a personal best is the best thing a trainer can experience! Seeing our clients achieve something they never thought they could is the most uplifting feeling. Clients spend their money and time with us and when a return is given on that investment, it’s really something to see!

ONE ENERGETIC CHANGE TO ATTRACT MORE MONEY B Y

S H E R R Y

P A R K S

My sister and I were born 13 months apart and often mistaken for twins. As we were growing up, it seemed like there were always two of most things. If one got something, then the other likely got one too. New dresses, new dolls, new shoes, etc. Our mom was pretty careful to make sure we had the same thing or equivalent.

There were a few things that my sister had different than me though. One of these was a little baby doll that she got before I was born.

This baby had a super soft body made of stuffing and cloth, and a molded plastic head.

I wanted a baby doll just like it for myself. At first, I just asked for one. But Mom would explain that she couldn’t get me one. Things weren’t like they are now, where you can find things online. As the years went by, I began to covet my sister’s and really wanted to take it from her.

My sister would sometimes let me play with her, but mostly, she kept her for herself. I tried to get my sister to give her to me, but she wouldn’t.

I remember one day, in particular, I wanted her so bad and my envy got the better of me. I grabbed her head and my sister held tight to her body. I yanked so hard trying to get her for myself that I pulled her head right off her body.

Luckily for us, my mom was a seamstress and she was able to reattach her head. Not as good as new, but as close as she could make it.

After that, my sister wouldn't let me play with the doll at all. In fact, she became very protective and possessive of the doll.

Another thing that my sister had

I remember begging her to

this little metal bank that

trade with me for one of my

secured on the bottom with a

treasures. But she never would.

key. She won it playing bingo of

No matter how much I begged

all things!

and pleaded with her, she wouldn't give it up.

Boy let me tell you that I had MAJOR bank envy. I remember

To me, that bank was the gold

eyeing that thing and wanting to

standard for saving money.

hold it and try out the key. It

And I wanted one badly. I

just seemed not only exotic and

remember asking my mom

special, but more secure than

where I could get one too. I was

anything I had. I’ve loved

even willing to give up some

stashing money in secret hiding

cash for it, but it was another

places as long as I can

thing that my mom just couldn’t

remember and this bank was

find for me.

PERFECT for that.

THE REASON I’M

SHARING THIS

STORY IS TO

REMIND YOU THAT

WANTING WHAT

SOMEONE ELSE

HAS IS ENVY

And envy just doesn’t create the right energy to attract what we want.

It’s like when you compare yourself with someone you see on social media. You often find that you don’t measure up to some perceived standard. That leads you to feel less than. It leads you to feel discouraged and often creates strife in your life.

It works the same with money. If we envy the money and success that someone else has or perceive them to have, you are putting the focus outside yourself. You lose sight of things you can control and that gives away your personal power.

It also creates repellent energy rather than attractive energy. And that for sure doesn’t get us what we want.

Hey, I get it. We are all just humans here. It’s easy to fall into a pattern of envying others. Here are a few tools to help you shift that feeling and to start creating the right energy for more money.

Be happy for others No, really. Being happy for other people can shift your own mood into a more positive place. Just by taking the thought off of “I want” and switching to “yay you”, can diffuse a bit of the feeling of envy. You take the focus off of wishing you have what they do and put it on gratitude that they have it. Test it out and see.

The next time someone buys the new car that you want – tell them you love it and are so happy for them.

Or at the very least, tell yourself you are happy for them. The next time you find yourself wishing you are making as much money as someone you know or see online – congratulate them. Tell them you are happy about their success. And if it feels fake, that’s okay. Just keep practicing it until you feel it.

Celebrate where you are right now.

Often when we want more money, we forget to look at what we’ve already accomplished. We tend to lose sight of the progress we’ve already made and for sure we often forget to enjoy it.

Instead, we look outward and see what someone else has and focus there. Which not only creates those feelings of envy but also robs us of our joy in our own successes. On the other hand, if we can celebrate where we are right now, we anchor in our trust in our own ability to change, grow and succeed.

So, the next time you feel envious, take a look at your own journey. Make a list of all the things that you have accomplished. Big or small, it doesn’t matter. They all count.

Did you start saving money every month, rather than spending it all?

Did you pay extra on your credit card, instead of just the minimum payment?

Did you see and pick up some money on the street, rather than looking at others and not even noticing it?

All of these are celebrations. And you deserve to feel joy in them. When you allow yourself to truly feel happiness and joy from your success, there is no room for envy.

Help someone in need This one is super powerful because it takes your focus completely off of what you don’t have and puts it onto what you can give to help others.

It doesn’t have to cost you a lot of money or even a lot of time. Just do something for someone else without expecting anything in return. You could: Make sandwiches and hand them out to the homeless.

Volunteer to walk dogs at the animal shelter.

Offer to clean house or carpool for your friend, so she can get some self-care time.

Find a cause you love and raid your piggy bank or change jar to donate.

Remember, it doesn’t have to be a lot of time or even money, but just doing something for others, will remind you that you have enough. More than enough even.

I encourage you to test these out and see what happens. I just bet you’ll find yourself feeling better, taking more action, and attracting the money that you want.

What do you think? Is envy keeping you stuck? I’d love to hear from you.

Sherry Parks, CPA, is a Money Mindset Coach who helps women escape feeling trapped by their finances. She is passionate about helping women change mindset, emotions, and actions regarding money so that they learn to keep what they have and generate more. Check out her 5 Steps to a Better Money Story workbook or join her women-only Facebook group More Than Enough Money Sisterhood.

HEARING LOSS AND COGNITIVE SKILLS AT ANY AGE. MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE.

BY TRACY MARKLEY

I remember being in class in the 3rd grade and having a tough time with reading and comprehension. The teacher would read out loud a story, then we would have to answer questions based on what she read.

I would read the questions and think to myself, "She did not say anything about this". I would get confused.

When we were given the assignment to read a paragraph then answer questions, I also had a tough time. The teacher told me it was because my parents were divorced that I had a challenging time focusing on school. Therefore, I would leave the classroom a few times a week for an hour to get special help with reading. I was in, I called it, dummy English and Reading classes through junior high. Even in high school, English was my hardest class.

I remember assignments to read a book. I would concentrate so hard on what I was reading and rereading pages over and over to comprehend. I still never could understand why I read one thing, but the teacher's test and discussions seemed like it was based on a different book altogether.

As I began college, I felt I could learn much better in classes if I sat to the front and off to the left of the classroom. I thought I was just quirky. It worked, so I went with it. In time I noticed that I do not hear well in my left ear but did not think too much about it. Once I was married and lived with my husband and step kids my hearing loss was apparent.

I went to get my hearing checked and I had severe hearing loss with certain tones. The audiologist asked me if I was fatigued all the time. I said yes. He said that he can see me watching lips and concentrating extremely hard to hear. He explained that this is very exhausting. I was not aware of this. I learned later that this is called “Hearing Fatigue” or “Listening Fatigue”.

He also asked me If I was in a band, military, or spent time shooting guns. I said no, none of them. He then explained that I have had this hearing loss since early childhood, and this was why I had a challenging time in school. It was not my parent's divorce. Back when I was in elementary school our hearing tests were performed by the school nurse. We all stood in line in the auditorium. We would take turns sitting at a table where we put big earmuff-type things over our ears and raised our hands to the sounds we heard for about a minute, then it was off to the next kid.

I got my first pair of hearing aids in my 30's. It made an enormous difference.

I heard sounds I never heard before. One story of a sound that makes others laugh when I share is the sound the blinker makes in a car. I got into my car leaving the audiologist’s office with my hearing aids on and the first time I turned, I heard the blinker beeping. I have not heard that since I was a kid.

I thought that only in the old cars my parents had made blinker noises and that in the newer cars the blinkers made no noise. It was my hearing loss.

When I got back to my studio to

I wore my hearing aids properly

work with my clients, several of

and daily as instructed for

them told me I am speaking

years. I moved out of state and

slower, and I am easier to

one day one hearing aid was

understand. I was also not

falling apart, so I slowly

saying "What?" as much.

stopped wearing them. I went about 2 years without wearing them. I did not think much about it.

I WENT TO A RETREAT THAT YEAR. IT WAS A GROUP OF SIX OF US.

One of the women there was extremely rude to me when

I told him when I wear my hearing

others were not around. I was

aids, I was told I speak slower.

blown away. I took the teacher in private and told him that

I respected what he said. I then

sometimes women are not nice

came home from the retreat and

to me when I do not know them

reached out to get my hearing aids

and asked him if he could please

fixed. I went to a new hearing doctor

watch me there and let me know

since I now lived in a new state. I

if there was something I was

asked the receptionist if we had a

doing to make that happen. I did

speech therapist in town that can

not tell him what this woman had

help me speak slower. She told me

done. By the end of the retreat

no, but I need my hearing rechecked

the leader told me that I had a

and that it was probably time for new

good speaking voice, but I speak

hearing aids.

to fast. That has not been pointed out to me in a long time.

I got my hearing checked. This doctor was way more detailed in my losses than my first doctor. I learned that they have had modern technology in the last two years. My original hearing aids were good but could not give me the help I needed at the level I needed, but the innovative technology could.

I have 80% hearing loss in the middle to high pitch sounds in my right ear and almost 100% loss of the same sounds in my left ear. My auditory nerve on the left is practically dead. While testing the left ear he had to make sounds in the right ear to stimulate the brain to send messages to the left due to the nerve damage. Our brains perform fascinating and extraordinarily complex actions.

This doctor said he could tell by how I spoke that I had this since before I even learned to talk. He was incredible in detail to help me understand.

I have hearing loss in the sounds where the critical speech cues take place. They are the letters/sounds of the; p, h, j, k, t, f, s th sh, ch. He explained I have not been hearing the s or sh sounds since I was a child and possibly never. I have done very well in life in making it work for me the best I can he explained. I have been extremely good at reading lips and not even knowing I was doing it. This is a common action for those with small or big hearing loss.

As face masks are worn, even those who do not have hearing loss have learned that they also watch lips to help them to hear and communicate. They were not aware they did it either.

People with hearing loss usually do not hear their own voices in their head clearly when they speak therefore causing the speaking pitch to be too low or too high. If we cannot hear specific letters as in my losses, we most likely do not speak those letters as well. This leaves us possibly to sound like we are slurring as we speak.

It is quite overwhelming to learn all of this as I look back and see all the struggles I had in my life. I have found awareness in how others perceive and act to someone in my shoes. It is not always friendly.

An example: I was at a gathering at the time while I was waiting for my new hearing aids to come in. I had shared my story with a woman. She said this to me. "If I did not know your story, I would not talk to you. You talk too fast; therefore, I feel stupid, and it makes me feel insecure” I went home crying. I could not believe that my speaking fast could affect someone so harshly like that.

I was extremely happy to have gotten my new hearing aids.

My responses from many people were "You speak clearer" "You don't speak as fast" "you are easier to understand” “When you do not have your hearing aids on you slur your words." A few even have said I am not shouting as much.

I personally hear myself speaking differently in my head.

At times I get stuck pronouncing a word, as if I am learning to speak again with certain words.

I am hearing the world differently. It is a fact that part of the brain was not working as much because I was not hearing specific sounds. My brain is adjusting.

The brain adjusts to new things, this is called Neuroplasticity, and it takes place as the brain adjusts to hearing sounds differently and at times even hearing sounds it never heard before.

CHILDREN WITH HEARING LOSS OFTEN HAVE DIFFICULTY UNDERSTANDING AND WRITING

This second pair of hearing aids had been life changing for me more so than with my first set of hearing aids.

I looked back and analyzed my own experiences as well as I did some extra studies on hearing loss in children and adults.

COMPLEX SENTENCES.

They have difficulty understanding words with multiple meanings. They comprehend and produce shorter and simpler sentences than children with normal hearing. This was me as a child and as an adult. When I studied in college and now in life, it takes me a long time to gather and retain what I am studying. I thought I was just slow. I just worked with it. It was new to me to begin understanding that hearing loss also played a role in how I read and write. Many things I experienced in my life begin to make sense. It did not make it easier, but giving the understanding around it, I am kinder to myself with the struggle.

Studies show from the earliest months of life, hearing is intimately tied to the development of language, reading, learning, and social skills. This is taking into adult life. This also is what happens with older adults that lose their hearing. They start losing their cognitive skills. I tell my older clients with hearing loss to get hearing aids. It will help them greatly. Not wearing hearing aids when they are needed can sometimes make one more prone to get dementia in older individuals. As for those two women in my story who treated me poorly. I took it very personally, and it made me so sad at both events.

My awesome hearing doctor explained to me that there are still rude people in the world and do not take this on as my issue. If someone is uncomfortable with my speaking, it is their problem, not mine. I have reminded myself that other people treat you according to their own insecurities and perception. It does not mean it is your reality.

The most recent update with my hearing loss story is that I got an even more improved pair of hearing aids last year.

This is my third pair. Each pair has advanced features and abilities that the last pair did not have. This is the first time in my life I hear the letter “S”. I can hear most conversations more clearly. When one has hearing loss we never her perfect even with the most advanced hearing aids adjusted to our needs, but they bring a significant improvement and enhances our quality of life and relationships. During the Covid Pandemic and the wearing of face masks, hearing is even a larger struggle for those who read lips. So always be kind and patient with those who do not hear well. If you or someone you know has a hearing loss, at any age, I suggest looking into getting hearing aids to better your life.

Tracy Markley is the owner of Tracy's Personal Training, Pilates & Yoga Studio. She is the author of 9 books. Her work is known for training stroke survivors. She also created the CEC course "Stroke Recovery Training" for the fitness industry. Tracy was one of the IDEA 2020 Personal Trainer of the Year Finalists. She is recognized for her work, books, and helping stroke survivors worldwide. She is an NFHOF Pro (National Fitness Hall of Fame) Recognized as one of "Today's Top Trainers" in 2019. She believes “Knowledge is Power” and has earned many certifications in the fitness industry. www.tracymarkley.com www.tracyspersonaltraining.com www.amazon.com/author/tracymarkley www.instagram.com/motivate_healthyfit www.facebook.com/tracyfitt www.twitter.com/tracysfitnesshb www.tracys-healthy-365.blogspot.com www.linkedin.com/in/tracymarkleyfit

FEEDING YOUR TODDLER & PRE-SCHOOL CHILD

By Sharon Clare

Toddlers/pre-school children are growing and developing quickly and it's an important time to make sure they are eating well to get all the energy (calories) and nutrients they need.

This is also an important time for children to learn about food and eating so that they get into the habit of consuming a healthy, varied diet, enjoyed with the rest of the family.

However, for parents and carers it can be hard to know exactly what toddlers should be eating and in what amounts.

Perfect portions for toddler tums Each day toddlers need three meals and some snacks made up of foods from the four main food groups, in the right balance and in portion sizes just right for them: Starchy foods x 5-a-day Fruit & vegetables x 5-a-day Dairy foods x 3-a-day Protein foods x 2-a-day* =5532-a-day! *3 portions if the child is vegetarian.

Starchy foods

The information below describes these food groups in more detail and gives examples of foods and portion sizes suitable for children aged 1 to 3 years.

It is important to always remember that it is normal for a toddler’s appetite to fluctuate - they may eat lots of food one day and much less the next – and that some toddlers will need more food than others, therefore a range of portion sizes for different ages and appetites are provided in the guidance below.

Starchy foods such as bread, rice, pasta, cereals, potatoes, and yams, provide your toddler with energy, B vitamins, calcium and fibre. Fortified starchy foods, such as fortified breakfast cereals, can also provide iron and, in some cases, vitamin D. High fiber starchy foods, such as wholemeal pasta and brown rice, should be introduced gradually because toddlers can fill up very easily on these bulky foods and stop eating before they’ve eaten enough energy for their needs.

Try to give your toddler at least five portions of starchy foods per day. Here are some examples of starchy foods in toddler-sized portions. ½-1 slice of bread 1-2 rice cakes or oatcakes 3-5 tbsp breakfast cereal 1-3 tbsp mashed potato 2-4 tbsp cooked pasta/rice 2-4 potato wedges ½-1 scone ½-1 chapati 2-4 tbsp canned spaghetti hoops

Fruits and vegetables Fruits and vegetables are a really important part of the diet because they contain vitamin C and other vitamins and minerals as well as fiber. You should encourage your child to eat a variety of fruits and vegetables every day; it might be useful to think about the colors of fruits and vegetables and to offer ‘a rainbow’ of options, selecting those that are purple/blue, orange/yellow, green and brown/white.

Some children may initially reject some fruit and vegetables, but don’t give up offering these foods – sometimes you might need to offer them 5 -15 times before your child accepts them. Encouraging toddlers to eat lots of fruits and vegetables will not only give them the nutrients they need but will also train their palate to like these foods, which will mean that they will be more likely to eat lots of fruits and vegetables throughout childhood and into adulthood.

Toddlers should eat at least five portions of fruits and vegetables per day, here are some suggestions for toddler-sized portions: ½-2 tbsp raisins ¼-1 banana 3-8 grapes ½-2 tbsp peas ½-2 tbsp broccoli ¼-½ medium apple 1-3 cherry tomatoes 2-6 vegetable sticks 2-4 tbsp canned fruit

Dairy foods Dairy foods, such as cheese, yogurt, milk, and fromage frais, are a very good source of calcium, protein, fat, and vitamins B2 and B12.

Full-fat varieties are best for toddlers, but from two onwards, semi-skimmed milk can be introduced if they are growing well and eating a healthy, varied diet. Skimmed and 1% milk are not suitable for children under five.

Toddlers need about three servings of dairy foods per day; here are some suggestions in toddler-sized portions: 1 beaker of milk (100 ml) 1 pot of yogurt (125 ml) 1 cheese triangle 2-4 tbsp rice pudding 1-3 tbsp cheese sauce 2 small yogurt tube Protein foods This food group includes meat, fish, eggs, nuts, pulses (such as beans, lentils, and chickpeas), and foods made from pulses (e.g. tofu, dahl, and soya mince). These foods provide protein and iron, which are essential for a growing child. In addition, oily fish (e.g. salmon, trout, and mackerel) is a rich source of omega-3 fatty acids and a dietary source of vitamin D. Try to serve these protein foods with another food or drink that is rich in vitamin C (e.g. fruit and vegetables) as this will help with iron absorption.

Your toddler needs two portions of proteins foods per day, three if they are vegetarian or vegan. Here are some example foods and portions: 2-3 tbsp chickpeas, kidney beans, dhal, lentils, or beans 2-4 tbsp cooked minced meat 1-2 fish fingers 2-3 tbsp baked beans ½-1 poached, boiled, or fried egg Peanut butter on bread or toast

Drinks It is important to make sure your toddler is hydrated because if not they may feel tired and not perform to the best of their abilities and in extreme cases may become seriously ill. Try to offer your toddler six to eight drinks per day (approximately 1 liter). It is best to give your child water as their main drink because it does not cause tooth decay, unlike drinks containing sugar, such as fruit squashes, fruit juices, sweetened milk, and fizzy drinks. If you are to offer sugary drinks, they should be diluted and limited to mealtimes to protect your child’s teeth from decay, between meals water and milk are best. Also, to discourage your child from developing too strong a preference for sweetened drinks, it is best not to offer these too often. To protect teeth from decay, toddlers should be consuming drinks (including milk) from a cup or freeflowing beaker and not from a bottle.

For more on healthy hydration for children aged 1-4 years Foods to avoid

Raw eggs – eggs should be cooked until the white and yolk are solid.

Foods containing raw or partially cooked eggs should be avoided to reduce the risk of salmonella poisoning.

Shark, marlin, and swordfish should not be given to toddlers because they contain more mercury than other types of fish.

Whole or chopped nuts should not be given to children under the age of 5 because of the risk of choking.

Low-calorie foods - for most toddlers there is no need to offer ‘low-calorie or ‘low-fat’ foods because children of this age need lots of energy for growing and for physical activity. However, once a varied diet is accepted and provided your child is growing well semi-skimmed milk can be introduced from 2 years.

Sugars – sweet foods and drinks can lead to tooth decay, so these foods should be limited and consumed only at mealtimes.

Encouraging your toddler to eat a healthy, varied diet

Avoid giving the following to toddlers: Salt – children aged 1 to 3 years should have no more than 2 g of salt (0.8 g sodium) per day to reduce the risk of health problems in later life.

Foods prepared at home can be flavored with herbs, spices, or lemon instead of salt. Some foods, such as cheese and meat products, are relatively high in salt so try to check food labels and avoid those which have more than 1.5 g of salt per 100 g (or 0.6 g sodium).

It is normal for young children to refuse to eat certain foods from time to time.

Some children will be reluctant to eat new foods and others will reject foods that are familiar even if they have previously eaten them without any fuss!

Typically, these types of behavior tend to reach a peak between 2 and 6 years of age, after which most children will become more accepting of a variety of foods. Despite this stage being fairly normal, ‘fussy’ eating should not be ignored because it is important that young children get used to eating a healthy, varied diet that includes foods from the four main food groups.

It might sound obvious, but the key to overcoming fussy eating is to help your child learn to like the foods you offer because children will eat more of foods they enjoy. It is important to remember that children are born with very few foods likes and dislikes – they acquire these through experience – and nearly all children are capable of learning to like a variety of foods from the four main food groups. You can help them to do this in a number of ways: Exposure, exposure, exposure! Repeatedly offering food, so that it becomes familiar, is known to increase children’s willingness to try it and eventually to like it. You might need to offer some foods 5 - 15 times or more before your child learns to like them, but they should get there in the end so don’t give up! You can increase the familiarity of foods in a number of ways, most obviously by offering them at meal and snack times, and also by teaching your child about food during playtime. Ideas include growing foods, cooking and handling foods, messy foodrelated play, reading stories, and singing songs about healthy foods.

Relax and praise. Pressurising or coercing your child into eating certain foods can sometimes work in the short term, but this tactic may backfire because your child is likely to develop negative associations with the food and be even less likely to eat it in the future. Pressure can take many forms including bribery (eat your broccoli and then you can have pudding); coercing (you will eat your broccoli); emotional blackmail (I’ll be cross if you don’t eat your broccoli) punishment (you will not watch your favourite TV programme if you don’t eat your broccoli); pressure (you need to finish all the broccoli on your plate) and force-feeding (physically trying to put food into your child’s mouth). The best approach is to offer foods in a relaxed way and to let your child decide how much they want to eat; when your child tries a new food or eats something they previously refused, even if it’s only a tiny piece, praise your child. Praise can help children to develop positive associations with food which will mean that they will be more likely to eat them again in the future.

Create a healthy home. Aim to create a healthy home environment that is conducive to healthy eating. Stock up on healthy foods from the four main food groups and try to avoid having foods high in fat, salt and sugars on display or in your child’s reach. ‘Modelling’, that is, allowing your child to learn from watching how you behave, has been shown to be an effective way to encourage children to accept new foods so lead by example and eat the foods that you would like your child to eat. It is also a good idea to limit your child’s exposure to food advertising, for example by limiting their screen time, as this might negatively influence your child’s food preferences by encouraging liking of foods high in fat, salt and sugars.

Overweight and obesity, physical activity, supplements, and dental health Overweight and obesity The UK has one the highest rates of childhood obesity in Europe, with more than one in five 2 to 4-year-olds estimated to be overweight or obese. Overweight and obese children are more likely to suffer from emotional and psychological problems and tend to grow up to be overweight or obese adults, which can lead to very serious health problems such as type 2 diabetes, heart disease, and certain cancers.

Sometimes it’s difficult for parents to recognize if their child is overweight. The NHS’s BMI calculator is a useful tool for seeing if your child is a healthy weight. If you are concerned, the best first step is to talk to your GP, who will be able to advise you about your child’s diet and activity levels and also signpost you to other support in your area.

Physical activity It is recommended that physical activity should be encouraged from birth since being active on a daily basis improves children’s bone health, develops movement and coordination, and contributes to a healthy weight. For infants who are not yet walking physical activity should be encouraged through floor-based play, such as ‘tummy-time, and water-based activities such as swimming. Pre-school children who are capable of walking unaided should be physically active for at least 180 minutes (3 hours) per day and not be sedentary for extended periods (except time spent sleeping). Physical activity will usually be in the form of active play and can also include more structured activities including energetic play (i.e. climbing frames, riding a bike), running, walking, swimming, or skipping.

Dental health It is very important to look after your toddler’s teeth. As soon as their first teeth emerge register them with a dentist and visit regularly, at least once a year. A healthy diet low in sugars will help to prevent your child from developing tooth decay.

Acidic or sugary drinks and foods should be limited to mealtimes as the more often your toddler consumes these types of foods and drinks the more likely they are to get tooth decay. To prevent tooth decay it is best to give your toddler only water or milk to drink between meals and to encourage drinks to be consumed from a cup or free-flowing beaker and not from a bottle. You should make sure to supervise your toddler brushing their teeth twice a day with fluoride toothpaste for two minutes.

Supplements It is recommended that children under the age of 5 should take a daily supplement of vitamins A, C, and D (in the form of liquid drops) – ask your GP, health visitor, or pharmacist for more information. Vitamin drops including vitamins A, C and D are available free of charge for low-income families through the Healthy Start scheme. See here for further details or speak to your health visitor.

Sharon can help you achieve your fitness goals in the gym, at home & also outdoors. Personal training is available 1-2-1, in couples & also small groups. Body coach fitness has a holistic approach to health & wellness, fitness, nutrition & sports performance & is dedicated to educating people on the benefits of a healthy lifestyle! Whatever your goals Sharon will help you achieve them. When not training others to achieve their goals Sharon works towards her own, training hard to compete at an international level as a natural physique competitor. www.bodycoachfitness.com www.bodycoachfitness.org https://www.facebook.com/sharon.clare.14 www.bodycoachfitnesseducation.com www.businessvault.net 07875086760

Health & wellness tips Health & nutrition & wellbeing

T O

Y O U R

H E A L T H

From eating the right food to the perfect exercise routine, find the best path to a healthier and happier you.

and Wellness Reduce Stress Develop at least one new stress-buster. Instead of a bowl of ice cream or alcoholic drinks, treat yourself to a bowl of tasty, exotic fruit, take a long walk someplace pretty, or enjoy an afternoon out with your spouse or best friend

Hello Bananas

Check your Sunscreen

Bananas are a good source of several vitamins and minerals, especially potassium, vitamin B6, and vitamin C, and potassium. A diet high in potassium can lower blood pressure in people with elevated levels and benefits heart health

Check your sunscreen for expiration dates.

Throw out and re-purchase if you need to.

Eat the RAINBOW Aim to eat all the colors of the rainbow each day (natural colors only, no Skittles)!

The Healing Powers Of Gathering With Friends

BY LORI BOOTY

Several years ago, my friends from college decided to get together for a girl’s weekend in Dallas, Texas. It had been many years since we had all seen each other. We were all busy with jobs and raising kids. I missed that first year, but they decided to make it a tradition.

The next year, we got together in San Antonio, Texas.

I made a plan to go with two of my college roommates, whom I hadn’t seen in years. About 30 women descended on La Cantera Resort in San Antonio. The resort overlooks rolling hills with lots of mesquite and oak trees.

The pool is a vanishing edge pool looking out over those hills. It was a beautiful, zen destination.

I was a little bit nervous to see all of these women again. I thought, maybe I’m fatter or maybe I look older than everyone else. Some of them I hadn’t seen in over 20 years. We had lost touch after graduating from college and attending each other’s weddings.

What I found out that weekend, was that I still had so much in common with these women. We had all had similar life events, children graduating from high school and heading to college, the loss of a parent or parental illness, and even concerns about looking older and gaining weight. My friends and I shared dinners together, hung out by the pool, and caught up on all the things we had missed in each other’s lives. We laughed until our sides were sore and our cheeks hurt from smiling that weekend. We all vowed to get together again the next summer.

Since that trip, I’ve been on three more weekend gettogethers with all of my friends. I just returned from our latest trip. Some of us missed last year due to Covid-19 and travel restrictions, but it doesn’t matter. When we get together, we pick right back up where we left off. It was especially nice to visit with friends after this past year and a half of feeling kind of isolated at home.

I often hear empaths and introverted people say that they just don’t have the friends they wished they had. It isn’t always easy to make a connection with other adults, especially if you’ve moved around a lot. If that is something you struggle with, try one of these ways to make adult friends.

Join a club that travels together or shares a common hobby Join a neighborhood book club or garden club Join a gym and take a group class at the same time every week Volunteer for an organization. Attend the fund-raising events to meet other volunteers.

Join a church or worship organization Invite your neighbors over for a potluck dinner or a wine tasting There are endless possibilities to get together with other adults. Hopefully, some of these suggestions will give you ideas. Life is meant to be spent with others. The love and guidance of friends are different from that of a spouse or other family members. Sometimes those connections can be life-savers, not to mention the health benefits that come from the support of a caring community of friends.

My friends have come through for me on all of life’s major events, like when my mother passed away, when our home flooded during Hurricane Harvey, and when we have been searching for jobs. I hope you are blessed with many friends too.

Lori Booty is a Certified Transformational Nutrition Coach with over 20 years of experience teaching elementary school and a Masters in School Counseling. She is the owner and creator of Beautifulimmunity.com. Lori began her health transformation after watching her mother battle a traumatic illness and she realized her own health was not as good as she wanted it to be. She found out that nutrition held the key to improving her symptoms and not medications with terrible side effects. Throughout her journey, she's found that there are many natural remedies she could turn to for her family and not always have to rush to the doctor. One of the most surprising remedies she found was that her thoughts actually impact the quality of her health. She now works to support women who are exhausted from raising kids and caring for aging parents to get back their own health without using medications or crazy, complicated diets. http://beautifulimmunity.com/ https://www.facebook.com/beautifulimmunity https://www.instagram.com/loriboot/

GIVE ME WONDER!

By Judy Brown

How is the sky so blue?

How does my breath know to breathe?

How is every leaf a carbon copy of the other?

How does a baby robin know when to hatch?

How do I know when to blink an eye?

How does each moment pass by?

How do the stars stay in the sky?

How does a flower know to bloom?

How does the wind know when to stop?

How does your smile make me smile?

How does the sun keep shining?

How does water know where to flow?

How does a frog learn to croak?

How does a baby learn to coo?

How does the moon keep its schedule?

I wonder!

If you ever feel stuck or in a funk.....step outside, listen to the birds, and wonder.

If you ever feel lonely or in need of a boost......offer up a smile and see what happens. Wonder how you create a connection.

If you ever need a reality check...... look up at the moon and stars. Ground yourself. Wonder about what you see and feel and smell and touch.

The ability to wonder is a gift. And perhaps it is an underused tool for healing. At the very least, it allows presence and calm.

At the very most, it creates excitement and inspiration!

Wonder....awe……creativity....spontaneity.....adventure.....out of the box.....solutions.....peace.....healing.....letting go......Give me wonder! Stay curious and channel your inner child. Never stop wondering.

If only we could box it up with a ribbon and give it as a gift!

Judy Brown has a BA in Biology from Connecticut College and is a Certified Holistic Health Coach trained by the Institute for Integrative Nutrition. She coaches women in their midlife years who want to reclaim their health and discover a more balanced and vibrant lifestyle. Judy provides individual and group coaching, workshops, smoothie demos, guided meditations for groups, and is an active blogger. She has two grown children. Judy loves to read, write, walk in the woods, sail, have afternoon tea, and explore the world with her husband. www.judyswellnesscafe.com https://www.facebook.com/judyswellnesscafe/ https://www.instagram.com/judyswellnesscafe/

HEALTHY BOUNDARIES – WHERE TO DRAW THE LINE

BY KIM KLEIN

I didn’t know what boundaries were when I was younger. Actually, I never knew what boundaries were until a few years ago. I never had them. I did what I thought others expected of me, or what would make them happy. I wanted to please them, even to my own displeasure. That was what I knew to do — be kind, smile, be polite, go along with the plan, if you don’t have anything nice to say — don’t say anything at all, be happy with what you’ve got, don’t rock the boat, wear a bra, wear some makeup (you want to look pretty, don’t you?) follow the rules. I could continue this list ad infinitum — but I think you get the idea.

When I did learn that boundaries were a way to establish how I wanted to be treated, how I wanted to live my life, I still had trouble sticking with them. Afraid someone would get irritated with me, upset, angry, call me selfish, or something along those lines. Then, I heard the quote somewhere, “the only people who get upset when you set boundaries are those who benefit from you having none.”

That woke me up. Those people must not have my best interest at heart.

Boundaries are what you might call your non-negotiables. It could be the way you want people to treat you, the way they talk to you, care for you and behave around you and others. For example, Maya Angelou set a boundary that she would not allow anyone to speak negatively about anyone else in her home. And if anything rude, cruel, or hateful was said, she would tell them “Take it all out of my house!” And they did.

Boundaries. They define who we are and who we are not. And yet, sometimes we become who we are not as to avoid having others dislike us — we don’t want to be an outcast or snubbed by the tribe.

As nature would have it, we want to belong, to be liked, and more importantly, loved. So, we draw our boundaries with chalk lines instead of permanent marker, and then, erase when we feel a bit of discomfort or negativity coming our way.

What happens when we don’t honor our own boundaries is that we begin to put up with things or do things that go against who we are, our truth, our values, and what we want to represent. We then start to feel resentment for the person or situation that we erased our boundaries for, when in fact, the resentment is really directed at ourselves, for allowing someone else to control us. We were unable to stand in our power and say or do what we felt was the right thing to do.

When and where have you felt off, mad at yourself, or resentful after an interaction or in a certain situation or with a certain person? Was it because you didn’t speak your mind?

You let someone talk badly to you or to someone else? Did you felt pressured to do something out of character? You did something that you knew deep down you didn’t want to do?

Did you felt used or taken advantage of by certain friends/family members/bosses or co-workers? Maybe it’s time for some boundary setting.

So, how do we start setting boundaries? Start small and begin with something minor (but something that still matters to you) and say no when you really do want to say no (don’t give in to the big pressure, nice girl yes!) No, believe it or not, is not a four-letter word! We can still be polite. We are simply exercising our priorities and practicing self-care. Whether it’s saying no to going somewhere you don’t want to go, saying no to doing a favor or errand for someone when you don’t have the time or energy, or saying no to a task that you know you’ll resent later, this small step in boundary-setting will give you a boost of confidence and empower you to start setting them where you need them most. Don’t worry about what others think — and remember the quote — “the only people who get upset when you set boundaries are those who benefit from you having none.” And that, my friend, is the reason we need to set boundaries in the first place.

Kim Klein is a Life Coach, Certified Holistic Health Coach, Certified Feng Shui Practitioner, and author. She is the founder of Kim Klein Life Coaching and Wabi-Sabi Women and is the author of Damn, the Pusherman ~ Sugar, The Legal Drug that is Keeping You Sick and Fat, and Nine Degrees North, a young adult fiction novel. https://kimkleincoaching.com/ https://www.facebook.com/groups/boomerwomen/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimberklein/ kimberjklein@gmail.com

CREATING A SUSTAINABLE HEALTH JOURNEY

BY CURT LEWIS

Tired of someone else telling you how to get “healthy”? Everyone has an opinion on what works and what will work for you. It can be incredibly frustrating, especially when it feels like you have tried everything without the desired result. As a functional health coach, I want to try and give you a few tips to get you the result you want and to help you live a great life along the way. The key is that you are creating it. Yes, there are guidelines, but by allowing you to play the major role, you are invested, and the journey is meaningful to you. My goal here is to “meet you where you are” in your journey and help you overcome obstacles encountered along the way.

Make it Personal Keto. Vegan. Paleo. Vegetarian. “Plant-based”. The Mediterranean.

I am sure you have heard it all. Try this diet. It worked for me; I am sure it will work for you. Then, if it does not work, the response you hear is “You must not have done it right”. Well, there could not be anything further from the truth.

The truth is that there is no one exactly like you. So, it is incredibly arrogant to say, “this is the best diet” or “this works for everyone.”

To be honest, it is my belief that people that use this type of dialogue are only interested in weight loss versus creating a healthy person. The philosophy I embody and coach clients by is that ‘you do not lose weight to get healthy, you get healthy and lose weight. Read that again and let it sink in.

Since there is no one like you, then there is no “one-size fits all” diet. So, why would you put your trust in someone who only tells you to count and restrict your calories, eat “x” times per day, count your macros, eat less and exercise more, etc? These tactics may work for certain individuals who are training for an athletic event/competition, or for a certain goal, and that is great. What I want for you is a plan that is sustainable and fits your lifestyle. I want you to learn and implement tools and create a system that allows you to live a life you love. One that heals you from the root, not just puts a band-aid on the situation.

Mindset Ok, you probably rolled your eyes when you read “Mindset”. The phrase “change your mindset” is perhaps an overused term. I can empathize with you. Several years ago, when I was going through a particularly challenging time, I would hear just change your mindset. I had no idea what that meant or how to do it, and hearing it just made me angrier and more frustrated. When creating your health journey, I want you to think about “mindset” in this way. I want you to practice eliminating negative thoughts in all walks of your life, not just around dieting and healthy eating. By doing this you will begin to turn limiting negative thoughts into a positive, growth mindset. You will start understanding why you had to go through the experiences you did to create the sustainable journey you are creating. In other words, those experiences did not happen to you, they happened for you.

This leads me to what I feel is the root of any mindset shift, which is “Determining your Why”.

Without a deep, meaningful reason to drive us forward, many people who start a journey will never complete it. It is simply because the “why” was not meaningful enough. A tool I use to help clients find their “why” is an exercise called Seven Levels Deep.

You simply ask yourself “Why do you want to do this?” Perhaps you answer, “Because I want to lose weight.” Then you ask yourself “Why do I want to lose weight?” For every answer, ask yourself “why”. By the time you have answered “why” seven times you will be at your true reason. The reason that will keep you moving forward on the journey.

I have a morning routine that I utilize to set me up for success and to fix my mind on the positive. I did not always have this, but I find that it keeps me focused and allows me to be in control of my actions and emotions. It is a habit loop I have created for myself that pays dividends daily. For me, my morning routine looks like this: I naturally wake between 7 and 7:30 am and immediately go into a 15-minute guided gratitude meditation. This is just a simple way for me to say thanks and to spend time with myself.

Feet hit the floor and I consume about 16 ounces of water. I call it showering my insides.

Perform about 45 - 60 seconds of light stretching/movement.

Make my bed.

Then it is my morning coffee (yes, I drink coffee), and then I walk or sit outside and read for about 30 minutes.

Shower and start my day of service.

This is what works for me. I try to get all these things in every day, but sometimes I need to prioritize and only hit the non-negotiables. Again, this is what works for me. Find what sets you up for success and allows you to be your best self.

Understand How Food Affects You This is where it gets really personalized.

For me finding a sustainable health journey does not include counting calories, macros, or following any particular “diet” fad. Who needs the added stress? In my opinion, this is why most “diets” do not work. Also, we do not all live in the same climate, or have the same genes, or tastes, etc. You are your own unique self and therefore you need your own unique approach.

First, keep a food journal for a week. In this journal you are going to note all the foods, drinks, and snacks you consume daily. Also, you are going to note how you feel before, immediately after, and then how you feel 1-3 hours after. Do not limit this to just how your gut/stomach feels.

Include your energy levels, any mental fog or clarity, emotions, nightly sleep quality, etc.

Second, based on your journal you are going to eliminate possible foods that trigger any agitation in your gut. This is the control center when you think about signals to your brain. If you are not sure where to start, start with the major culprits which are sugar, grains, gluten, and dairy.

Eliminate these foods for three weeks. Continue to note how you feel after eliminating these foods.

If you are asking “what am I going to eat?”, believe me, there are plenty of options that will leave you satisfied and satiated. The key is to focus on eating whole, nutrient-dense, unprocessed foods. After three weeks of elimination, begin to reintroduce one food at a time on a weekly basis. I recommend starting the reintroduction phase with dairy. Once you have reintroduced the food, note how you feel after consuming it. If you do not react negatively, it is probably okay to consume again. However, if you feel bloated, tired, foggy, or perhaps break out you most likely have a sensitivity to that food, and it should be eliminated. Nobody likes to feel bloated or foggy.

After this exercise of journaling and eliminating, it is my hope that you begin to understand why you are eating and/or craving certain foods. Often, we are not eating because we are physically hungry. More often we eat because we are stressed, depressed, dehydrated, and bored…or a combination of all these factors. By going through this process, we become conscious eaters and we understand why we make certain food choices. I will be the first to admit that I am not perfect. After years of knowing how my body reacts to dairy and sugar, and the “recovery” time for my body, I still fall prey to the allure of cookies and ice cream. The difference today is that I know and understand the consequences and I accept them, I know why I am making the choice, and I do not feel guilty. I know my journey will not be perfect, and I have the tools to correct myself and get back on the path.

Movement The final key element to a sustainable health journey is movement.

Moving our bodies is vital to maintaining our health especially in today’s sedentary world. It does not take a lot of time and it can take many forms. The key is to find something you enjoy. If you dislike the activity, you will not continue, and therefore it is not sustainable for you. There are many options available, and you do not have to join a gym to participate. A few of my favorites are: Resistance training – I enjoy this modality because it helps me maintain and grow lean tissue, which is vital for overall functionality as we get older.

Yoga/Pilates – This is my go-to for mobility and range of motion training. It is also a good way to learn about your body, how it moves, and find areas of weakness. Another bonus, it teaches breathing techniques that help control stress levels and can be meditative as well.

Hiking/Walking/Biking I love this activity because it gets me out in nature. Most of us spend the majority of our day indoors in recycled air. Hiking/walking/biking allows us to embrace fresh air, explore new areas, and download some Vitamin D from the sun. Done in the morning or in the evening it also helps set our natural circadian rhythms for better sleep quality.

Swimming/Tennis I love to play tennis and I enjoy being in and around the water. While I am not great at either of these activities, I enjoy challenging myself to improve. Also, they present a different element of movement than the other options, i.e., short bursts of energy for tennis, and swimming presents a new cardiovascular test for me.

Mix it up Finally, do not just stick with one activity. The more variety you have in your movement (and your diet) routine the easier it is to stay excited about it. Also, make it a social occasion. Invite friends, family, co-workers, etc. If you work in an office, I encourage you to get outside at least twice during the workday. It will revitalize you, help you think clearer, and reduce any stress you may be feeling.

Conclusion Remember, you are your own unique individual. You are on your own journey. Your health journey will be unique to you. Only you know your background, your environment, your lifestyle, your level of knowledge, and your health history. Two of the most important things to remember is: You are not your past and never accept the phrase “learn to live with it” when it comes to your health.

It is ok to fail. It is part of the learning experience and the journey. And you never fail…you win, or you learn.

Take these tips and create your own awesome health journey. If it seems too much all at once, then start with one piece of the puzzle and add on as you master each element. I would recommend starting with your mindset. Once you understand the “why” and release negative thoughts and energy you will naturally start to see positive changes in other walks of your life.

Here’s wishing you lifelong health, using real-life approaches.

Curt Lewis. Curt Lewis is a Certified Transformational Nutrition Coach (CTNC) and Mental Health and Emotional Eating Specialist through the Institute for Transformational Nutrition. He is also a Certified Personal Trainer (CPT) and Fitness Nutrition Specialist (FNS) via the National Academy of Sports Medicine (NASM). He focuses on helping others live longer, healthier, and happier lives through fitness, nutrition, and self-care.

Curt can be reached at curt.fit.lifestyle@gmail.com and on Facebook and Instagram at Real.Fit.Lifestyle. https://www.facebook.com/RFitLifestyle/ https://www.instagram.com/real.fit.lifestyle/

JOURNEY THROUGH THE PLANETS – PART III THE SOCIAL PLANETS

BY LINDA WATSON

To this point, I have covered the luminaries and the personal planets in this four-part mini-series. These next planets are two of my favorites, Jupiter and Saturn. Whenever I do a chart reading for someone, towards the conclusion of the reading, I always include a look at transiting Jupiter and Saturn in terms of forecasting where their opportunities and challenges may currently be. Let me explain about these very social, but very different planets.

As previously discussed, each planet in the solar system represents a different set of qualities and characteristics, and rule over a different part of our lives with each bringing their own unique energy and direction. I like to think of the planets as characters, each with different personalities, goals, interests, and jobs.

Jupiter and Saturn are known as the “social planets” because they control personal and social relations.

They link us to society and have an impact on how we relate to the world. These planets are very important in understanding our role on this earth, the formation of our sense of social purpose and direction, and our search for achievement in the world. They are the planets most concerned with professional development and our pursuit of success.

Jupiter is the largest planet in our solar system and is considered the “larger than life” planet or the great Benefactor planet. Jupiter is the planetary ruler of Sagittarius. In Greek mythology, Jupiter was Zeus, King of the Gods. I tend to think of Jupiter as “Santa Claus” because he provides us with abundance and good fortune in our lives. There is a huge generosity to this planet’s energy, bordering on extravagance. It represents luck, fortune, success, and a force for good in the world. Due to the freedom associated with this planet, it is easy to over-expand and we can have trouble putting the brakes on too much of a good thing.

This planet symbolizes meaning, truth, and growth. It gives us our belief system and where we find the value and purpose in our lives, as well as the ability to grow spiritually. Jupiter enables us to broaden our horizons and provides opportunities for expansion which are available in the area of life where you find it in your birth chart.

It helps us find opportunities to expand our personal goals and our pathway toward success regarding the future. In transit, Jupiter shows where you expand your life in new ways and have new experiences. In a solar return chart, which is a birth chart of a new year in your life that runs from birthday to birthday, Jupiter shows where you will experience its expansive and abundant energy and opportunities for that year. It will provide the needed positivity and favorable circumstances creating your “gift” for the year. You may choose to use these gifts for personal purposes or choose to apply the knowledge and opportunities provided by Jupiter for the good of society and share your good fortune with others.

Where Jupiter describes the opportunities experienced in our outer world, Saturn describes the limitations. Where Jupiter expands, Saturn constricts.

In Greek mythology, Saturn was Chronos, the God whose name means time. He was the father of Zeus. He is also known as the “Old Man” or “Father of the Zodiac” and rules old age, maturity and time.

Saturn, the planetary ruler of Capricorn, is the ambitious and practical planet of achievement, determination and hard work. I picture Saturn as the strict and authoritative father figure who makes the rules and sets our curfews.

Although many see Saturn as a malefic planet, I view him as the planet that gives us structure and is our moral compass. He reminds us of our boundaries, responsibilities, and commitments. Saturn is the planet that teaches us our hardest lessons and forces us to have discipline and order in our lives. It’s because of these rules and limitations that we are able to achieve the most in life. Many times, we are forced to learn things the hard way, but through these painful experiences, we achieve our greatest growth. Saturn represents growth and responsibility, and growth hardly ever comes easily. It is your greatest challenge until you master it, then it becomes your greatest support.

Jupiter’s tendency for over-expansion needs to be curbed by Saturn’s boundary setting. It’s the part of you that really wants to do the right thing even when it is difficult because Saturn governs “right actions” and motivates us to do the things we don’t feel like doing. Saturn will be a restrictive force, but only until you learn the lessons it has to teach you. Once you have learned this, the restrictions are lifted, and Jupiter is again given the freedom to expand further.

In the birth chart, Saturn shows where we have lessons to learn and responsibilities to manage. We were all born with some sort of blockage, usually related to fear. One of life’s purposes is to break through the blockage by recognizing it and taking responsibility for it and knowing that breaking it requires commitment, selfdiscipline, and time. If we can successfully accomplish this, we achieve a new level of maturity, self-respect, and a new level of happiness. In transit, Saturn spends about 2 ½ years in each sign and can remain for more than 2 years in a house. Transit Saturn shows where you need to become more responsible and mature, where you have work to do, where you can expect to experience blockages and delays, and where you can dedicate your time to overcome these obstacles.

When analyzing Saturn within a solar return chart, it will indicate what your yearly lesson might be and where your challenges during the year are going to occur. It can provide information about additional responsibilities and recognition of any limitations and boundaries. Saturn can be our motivational teacher to push us through.

An example of how Saturn works in our lives can be illustrated by the following: if Saturn is in the 4th House of a solar return chart, that person will most likely feel more responsibility to their home and family. The 4th House is representative of home, family, security, and ancestry. The events that manifest could be anything from having grown children move back in the house with small children from a dissolved marriage, or aging parents who become dependent and need more help and guidance, or maybe this person moves into another home that needs some restoration. The underlying theme is increased responsibility within the family and home during the year. Jupiter and Saturn seem so opposite, yet they need each other. When they combine their energies, they create a perfect stop-and-go combination. When Jupiter wants to head off on an adventure and impulsively fly to Vegas for the weekend, Saturn shows up to make sure we don’t gamble away our life savings or end up in jail. Jupiter is the gas; Saturn is the brakes.

Linda Watson is the owner and creator of Soul Guide Astrology. She is a member of the American Federation of Astrologers. She provides birth chart readings and solar return (yearly) chart readings, offering support, insight and guidance to better help others find their focus and move forward with their dreams. You can schedule a consultation by visiting her website, www.soulguideastrology.com. Find her on Facebook at Facebook.com/linda.watsonastrolog or on Instagram at instagram.com/soulguideastrology

AUGUST 2021 HOROSCOPES ARIES – March 21 – April 19 This month sparks your creativity and gets your juices flowing. There is a strong connection between your inner thoughts and ideas and creative self-expression. Focus on what you love and where you find your passion so that you can shine your light in a more artistic and inventive way. You feel more magnetic, wanting to present your creative work and receive appreciation for it. This is a time to nurture your individuality and pursue the development of a unique talent.

The New Moon squaring Uranus in your 2nd house suggests that any creative activity started can have a positive outcome financially as well.

TAURUS – April 20 – May 20 August is all about home, family, and your emotional needs.

Listen to your intuitive self and figure out what will make you feel comfortable and secure. It is likely that you take steps to change your living situation either through beginning the search for a new house or initiating the process of home remodeling or renovation. Feeling at home and a sense of comfort is important and creating a place of retreat that reflects your personality is emphasized. Bring in new energy by clearing things out, moving things around, or bringing in new additions. Focusing on your emotional needs will help make these adjustments easier.

AUGUST 2021 HOROSCOPES GEMINI – May 21 – June 20 You will be feeling more socially active and looking for variety in your life. In fact, the storyteller in you is front and center, making for great conversations and the give and take of ideas and opinions. You will want to make sure you are getting your messages across in an easy-to-understand way, so this would also be a good time to read up on communication skills or begin writing projects that enhance your self-expression or help you to organize your thoughts. The goal is to integrate your feelings with your thoughts and thereby communicate in a more effective manner.

CANCER – JUNE 21 – JULY 22 Are you inspired to begin evaluating your finances and deciding how secure you feel within that area of life? Begin by assessing what is of real value to you and where your self-worth resides. This is a time of new beginnings in terms of how you arrange your life in order to feel financially stable and secure. Look at your spending practices, savings, and investments. Do you have a budget plan? Are there new opportunities to increase your income? Make sure you feel comfortable with how much you think you are worth and how you are being compensated for your services.

AUGUST 2021 HOROSCOPES LEO – July 23 – August 22 With the New Moon in your sign this month, this is your opportunity to shine your light on the self-image you are projecting to the world. It is time to turn a new page in the chapter of your life. Reflect on how you want to present yourself both physically and professionally. It is a great time to set new intentions to recreate yourself; review your appearance, work on your personal development, and decide on how to make the most of your assets. With the Moon making a square aspect to Uranus in the career sector, this is your chance to change the way others perceive you.

VIRGO – August 23 – September 22 This is a very mystical time as you feel connected to your spirit and your subconscious mind. These next few weeks are a time to heal and to reflect on everything that has happened this year so far. Eliminate and release all of those things that are stopping you from finding your joy and purpose in the world. The New Moon in your 12th house brings into the light all of the things you weren’t able to see before and allows you to make room for new energy to move in. Paying attention to your night-time dreams is important now. They can provide insight and messages not available to your consciousness. Journal your dreams for insight, begin a consistent meditation practice or discover new spiritual work to illuminate the answers you are looking for.

AUGUST 2021 HOROSCOPES LIBRA – September 23 – October 22 You want to discover and solidify your “tribe” this month.

Finding those friendships and group associations that are in tune with your wishes and aspirations can help you to plant your seeds and grow an opportunity you have been contemplating. The New Moon squaring Uranus in the 8th house heightens your intuition and increases your ability to transform yourself and motivate you to begin something unique and truly your own. Keep your eyes open for opportunities that begin within a new group or organization that can help grow your ideas or possibly bring a benefactor who will help you out.

SCORPIO – October 23 – November 21 The New Moon is moving through your house of career, life path, and public reputation. Your soul is longing for more recognition, more responsibility, or simply more meaning and purpose in life. This is the time for a new beginning and the time to start laying the foundation for the changes you want to make in this area, whether it means deciding if you are in the right career or following the right path in life.

Focus on how you are projecting yourself to society and as a professional. With this New Moon in Leo, it carries powerful energy for you to shine and make yourself noticed in your professional and life path.

AUGUST 2021 HOROSCOPES SAGITTARIUS – November 22 – December 21 Where and how can you expand on your beliefs and faith?

Have you been questioning your philosophies and ideals? This New Moon has you on a mission to open your mind to new possibilities of what you have always claimed to be your truth.

This time period is about expanding the mind and your horizons through spiritual exploration, realizing that something greater than ourselves exist. Perhaps you will be interested in philosophical subjects through higher education and higher thought, or in expanding your perspectives through cultural travel. This time period is about looking at life from a broader perspective, being less judgmental, and inviting in a more positive and uplifting phase in your life.

CAPRICORN – December 22 – January 19 The New Moon is moving through your 8th house, bringing up feelings that run deep and powerful. This time period can bring up psychological and emotional issues within close personal relationships. You may ask yourself if you have been giving away your power to another or carrying around someone else’s baggage. It will be important to communicate with your partner in a deep and meaningful way, as well as to intimately bond on a sexual level. This can truly be a time of empowerment for you, providing you with insight into not only your own but into other’s motivations and issues of power and control. Trust your intuition, investigate and become more aware of the psychological influences affecting you and your close relationships.

AUGUST 2021 HOROSCOPES AQUARIUS – January 20 – February 18 Be prepared for a new relationship story to develop. Your love relationship is taken to a new and more committed level. If you are moving in together or getting married, decisions will have to be made with regard to your domestic situation. The New Moon is in square to Uranus in the 4th house, so issues surrounding family and home will develop. Are you thinking of merging your 2 homes together, signing a contract on a brandnew home, or perhaps making changes to your current residence to accommodate more than one family? In making decisions, keep in mind not only your personal needs but the needs of your partner as well, making sure you both are on the same page regarding your desires.

PISCES – February 19 – March 20 Your well-being is the focus this month. If your life has been out of balance, it is time to restore order and organize your life in a positive way. Set your intentions to develop a new and improved lifestyle. This is a good time to make gradual changes to your daily routines, the things you’re in service to, stress management, and above all else, your overall health. Develop a health consciousness toward your meal planning and exercise habits, being mindful that it is something you can realistically keep up with. Make changes to your routine gradually and incorporate them permanently.

The Divorced Woman’s Guide To . . .

Learning The Art of Relaxation

BY WENDY STERLING

We can never know what life has in store for us. As we live through a historical global pandemic, we have been forced to reckon with this reality. But regardless of what’s going on in the world right now (or perhaps exactly because of it), what many of us do know is that we want to connect with others, be happy, and life truly is short. So when we’ve done all that we can to hold on to our marriage, our family, we realize that divorce is the path forward for us.

Divorce represents an agonizing yet necessary life change that will lift the weight your marriage has left on your shoulders and help you feel free and lighter again.

Practicing self-care during divorce will allow you to take that freedom one step further—believe it or not, you’re about to become a free, joyous, and stress-free person.

If you’re currently lone wolfing, there are limitations on just how much you can put yourself out there right now, but what you can do is breathe, slow down, and live in the moment. Just like anything in life, even divorce, this too will pass. When it does, you will want to be ready to hit the ground running.

So, you get to begin your divorce healing and recovery journey with the following steps, and you’ll soon be on your way.

Create new routines To feel whole again, you get to be back in touch with your inner self. One of the best ways to revive your sense of inner peace is to change your habits. Married life can make you feel like you are on autopilot. Every morning you set yourself in motion, following your welllearned patterns and routines until the clock runs out.

It likely wasn’t just your relationship that no longer served you when you decided to end your marriage. It was the entire routine, too. Now that you’ve freed yourself of it, you get to create new routines that will make you feel like yourself again. Instead, consciously try something new that works for you and your new life.

Revive your spirit and soul Another way to practice self-care during divorce is to set your mind at ease and awaken all of your senses. You might be overwhelmed with constant thoughts of how life will look now and how you’ll cope with challenges you may face on your own, so practicing classic mindful exercise is crucial. Meditate, read a book, visit a spa, get a massage, treat yourself to a manicure, or do something else equally relaxing. Yoga has also proven to be extremely helpful as you can work on clearing out the mental clutter that has been piling up inside you and improving your physical health at the same time.

Do the things you love Nothing is more vital than finding your inner peace and learning how to love yourself once again (or maybe even for the first time). People who have been stuck in a bad relationship can never truly discover what it feels like to be free and loved. That is why the best way to practice self-care during divorce is to spend time doing the things you love. Go to the movies, read a book, try Zumba, find a new hobby, or travel somewhere new. Take advantage of all the new-found time you have to yourself to do things that suit your desires and dreams—chase new experiences and anything that makes you hopeful about the future. The things you either had to ask permission and time to do.

With time, you will learn that this divorce has, perhaps, been one of the greatest gifts of your life—one that helped you live more freely and authentically. But until that happens, you get to clear your thoughts and do your best not to think about the past or “what ifs.” To move forward, be open to new opportunities, support and friendships, and remember that time really does cure everything.

Wendy Sterling is a Divorce Recovery Specialist, writer, author, and speaker who founded The Divorce Rehab™. Wendy helps divorced women recover from their divorce by finding their true identity and voice by ending their pity party, mourning the loss of their marriage to create a new, better life they design. Prior to becoming a certified life coach, Wendy established her 18-year career as a top-level advertising sales executive in the digital space, at the world’s most progressive social and lifestyle website brands (such as Who What Wear and Refinery29). After learning of her own unexpected divorce and finding the world of coaching, she realized she could combine her 20 years of experience in Corporate America as a leader with this new coaching methodology and make a profound impact in the world. She helps women see their divorce as a gift, it happens FOR them not TO them. Wendy is a graduate of UCLA and a Certified Professional Co-Active Coach (CPCC) from The Co-Active Training Institute. She is also an Associate Certified Coach (ACC) through the International Coach Federation. She is a guest blogger on Hello Divorce as well as a Contributing Writer for Divorced Girl Smiling.

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/wendytsterling/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/divorcerehabwithwendy/ Website: https://www.wendysterling.net/

“Lockdown” we all know that word all too well by now … but I know from speaking with clients and friends that COVID has

How to navigate social food & body image anxiety

BY VICTORIA KLEINSMAN

brought both anxiety AND comfort.

Anxiety more so to begin with, as everything was different, unknown, and scary as the world was in a full-blown pandemic, we were forced to stay at home, isolated, cut off from friends and family, we all know how it was. But as lockdown became our new “normal”, some were secretly pleased about it… no more having to make up an excuse to turn down unwanted social invites, no more mad rushing around to fit everything in with the kids, work, gym, etc. No more wondering what to wear for work or nights out or stressing about how others might perceive your body… long live takeaways, pj’s, and top knots!

Our comfort zone became even more comfortable! And recently, in the Uk, (as I write this it’s June 2021) things have started to open up again. Life is getting back to some kind of “normal”.

Which is fantastic! But, as I mentioned, some are feeling anxious about the world opening up again. *** There is a pattern here – change and the unknown provokes anxiety ***

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Here are some of the concerns that have been shared with me: “What will friends, family, and coworkers think about my “lockdown weight gain”? – because Netflix and takeaways were the “go-to” and comfort eating was real!”

“I have got so used to staying in and taking time for myself, how will I cope when my life is busy again?“ “I’m on a diet which I have been able to stick to with no distractions during the lockdown, how will I stay on track when I’m going out for meals again?”

“I’ve not stopped binging and emotional eating since lockdown, I can’t bear people to see me looking like this and if I’m faced with more opportunities to eat, how can I manage this?”

I feel each and every one of those concerns which is why I wanted to share 7 tips to help with how to navigate all of that.

What does social anxiety feel like?

I would bank on the fact that you already know what this feels like but I’ll recap so we can establish some common ground…

Let’s role-play a scenario together: Your friend invites you out somewhere, let’s say she wants you to be her plus one at her work party and you immediately say; “Yeah, sure I’d love to!” but immediately after think; “Oh sh*t, why did I just say yes?!”

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You’re already thinking of what excuse you can use to cancel nearer the time or what diet you need to start tomorrow… All you know is that you absolutely cannot go looking like this! You’re already dreading the (perceived) judgments from others and you remember that guy you liked will be there too. You’re in full-on panic mode.

Does the above scenario resonate with you?

I used to be a master at canceling on people, coming up with the best believable excuses… which, thinking about it, actually just made me into a professional “white lier”.

If I did ever make it, I would spend the week leading up to the event starving myself (for the flattest tummy possible) and then most of the night worrying about what my body looked like to onlookers, constantly clock watching and wondering if it was an appropriate time to “disappear” to go home and binge!

I missed out on SO much potential FUN and CONNECTIONS with other humans because I was so absorbed in worrying what others would think about me and using all my willpower to resist the delicious buffet only to go home early to binge on my own.

How sad is that…? I feel for my old self and I feel for anyone who is currently experiencing the same thing.

Because I’ve been there and I remember how chronic thoughts about food and my body consumed my whole life and stopped me from LIVING…

But there is another way… it is possible to enjoy social occasions for all that they have to offer without giving food and your body a second thought! It is possible to eat what you want without giving a sh*t about whether it’s going to bloat you or not…

Because there is more to life than spending your whole life either on a diet or feeling ashamed of your binging. There is more to life than having a “bangin” body. When all is said and done and you’re on your deathbed, are you really going to wish you had “got yourself under control” and dropped 20lbs? Or are you going to wish that you had spent less time worrying about how you looked and lived and experienced more instead…?

I’ll leave that with you as we go into my 7 tips #1 See the truth about people’s comments If anyone comments about your body or your weight – no matter that their intention is for doing so – all they are doing is projecting THEIR insecurities onto you… Our perception is our projection The deeper the wound, the harsher the judgment Want another quote…? (Of course you do)

What anyone thinks about you has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them.

If someone feels the need to comment unkindly about your body or your weight, they are only projecting their unresolved issues onto you, my friend. So although it may hurt you emotionally, the more you remind yourself of the universal truth – which is that what people think about you are not facts – the easier it will be to let it go.

A side note on perceptions Each and every one of us sees the world through our own “filters”. Our own individual filters were developed within us when we were children (through social and parenting conditioning).

These filters are our perceptions of how we see the world. These filters are basically our unconscious minds. And our unconscious minds automatically run 90% of our thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and results… AKA it runs our lives unless we consciously decide to change it by becoming aware and then choosing to do so.

Imagine being born into a world where the

When you enter the world of body positivity,

moment you opened your eyes for the first time,

body neutrality, and self-love, you slowly take off

you were fitted with brown-colored contact

those brown coloured contact lenses and see

lenses. Everyone wears these brown-colored

the world and everyone in it as the beautiful,

lenses because many years ago someone in

vibrant and individualised miracles that we each

power decided that that’s just what should

are.

happen. Having these brown lenses on your eyes since birth would cause you to see

So my point is, it’s ok if others haven’t removed

everything with a brown tinge to it, without even

their brown-colored contact lenses yet. It’s ok if

realizing it.

YOU haven’t yet. But when you do, other

Imagine taking out those lenses for the first time,

people’s opinions on your body won’t matter to

you would see the world in a completely different

you in the slightest. Because you’ll know the

way, wouldn’t you…?

truth of who you really are… a child of God who

Now let me get to the point of what I’m trying to

was created to be the person you are today…

make here...

and in every moment of your life.

Now imagine that those brown-colored lenses are today’s social judgments and opinions

#2 Learn to detach yourself from your

around weight, fat, and women’s bodies. You

thoughts & emotions

would see the world and everyone in it (including yourself, especially yourself) through the filter of

Ok so there are a few different steps to do this:

what is and what isn’t acceptable for women’s

Acknowledge that you’re feeling anxious

bodies to look like. You would believe it to be

(about your body or food)

true because that’s all you’ve ever known and everyone around you thinks the same way too.

Know that you are not anxious, you are only feeling it. So avoid saying things to yourself like “I am so anxious right now” or “I am a binge / emotional eater.” You are not the feeling, you are just experiencing it.

Be the watcher. By taking a back seat and observing/noticing the emotion that you’re feeling, you become the watcher of it. You don’t become consumed by it.

Stay present. Resist the urge to escape what you feel. Don’t try to avoid or numb the anxiety that you feel by either attempting to stuff your emotions down with food, alcohol, or scrolling on your phone. Allow the feeling to be there and let it be felt and passed through you. It’s like someone knocking at your door that refuses to go away until you’ve invited them in and asked them what they want. You may as well let them in at the first knock otherwise they will just keep knocking louder and louder until you can’t take it anymore and you will have to let them in anyway… so let your anxiety in!

This one may sound a bit strange but thank the anxiety that you have just felt or are feeling. The anxiety is only trying to protect you in a roundabout way from potential perceived harm. (Eg- judgments from others).

Pour compassion into yourself, don’t be annoyed that you feel anxious about your body or around food.

Nothing good will come from self-punishment. Everything good comes from self-compassion.

Ask yourself “What do I need right now?” It may be going to the bathroom and taking a few deep breaths. It may be sharing how you are feeling with someone you trust. It may be giving yourself a little pep talk and some love. It may be moving your body by walking or dancing for a few minutes to shift your state.

#3 Don’t abandon yourself If you’re anything like I used to be, the anxiety you feel about an upcoming event may cause you to skip meals and do everything possible to “get yourself and your body under control” before the event. This is abandoning yourself!

If it was your responsibility to look after a dependent child for the week or so leading up to the event, would you treat the child the same way that you treat yourself? If the answer is no, why do you think you deserve to be treated in any way that’s not loving, caring, or kind?

If your body doesn’t look the way you want her to look, is it fair of you to deprive her of nourishment, self-care, positive self-talk, and kindness? Just so that you can attempt to control others' opinions of you – that we will NEVER be able to control anyway?

I get that the anxiety you may feel leading up to the event, whatever it may be – whether it’s meeting up with friends for a walk after months in lockdown – going to a party or on a night out – can be

#4 Give yourself permission to eat what you want

overwhelming… but abandoning yourself by speaking to yourself like shit, starving yourself to get your

Whether it’s a set menu or you get to choose what

stomach as flat as possible and anything else you

you want when you’re there, give yourself 100%

might do in an attempt to be “good enough” will only

permission to eat exactly what it is that you want.

set yourself up for failure.

Don’t be anxiously looking at the menu trying to find the smallest possible dish with the least amount of

If you arrive somewhere starving you’re only going to

calories. Also, don’t just eat everything just because

be fighting with yourself not to binge when you come

you’ve “allowed” yourself as it’s a “cheat day” either.

into contact with food.

So take care of yourself! Nourish yourself with food,

Eat what it is you really want. Tune into your body,

self-care, and positive self-talk. Leading up to the

imagine eating a few different things on the menu and

event, on the day of the event, and always!

choose what feels best for you emotionally and physically.

Relax into your desires, be present and enjoy the whole experience. When you find yourself focusing on what your body looks like or how much you’ve eaten, come back into the present moment… what can you see, hear, smell and sense around you. Let it go. #5 Set healthy boundaries If the people that you hang around with or speak to often in your life are always talking about what diet they’re on, how much weight they’ve lost or gained and judging others on their bodies, etc, set healthy boundaries for yourself around them.

Skillfully change the conversation or ask them politely outright if they would mind talking about something else. Explain that you’re practicing body acceptance and working on healing your relationship with food and these types of conversations can be triggering for you. They might look at you a bit strangely, to begin with, because it’s the norm to talk about these things (remember the brown contact lenses analogy) but if they love and care about you then it won’t be a problem, you might even strike someone’s interest in what you’re learning. If they don’t respect your request and continue to talk about it then you can remove yourself from the situation by going to talk to someone else or going to the toilet or even looking at your phone. You, more than anyone else, deserve your love and kindness and it’s important to keep choosing yourself and putting yourself and your needs first. #6 Do the inner work to heal your core wound You knew this one was coming, didn’t you…

By getting to the root cause, the core wound of your food and body image anxiety, you will be able to heal this and therefore the anxiety will naturally melt away.

If you only focus on navigating the side effects of the root cause – the side effects being: disordered eating body image anxiety binge eating chronic dieting preoccupation with how your body looks low self-esteem and self-confidence You’re going to have to continue navigating these for the rest of your life unless you heal your core wound – which is usually one of, a mixture of, or all of the following: Not feeling “good enough” at your core Self-worth is dependant on how the body looks Lack of self-love Lack of self-worth

When your beliefs are self-limiting eg: “I’m not lovable unless I’m a size ___” “I won’t be accepted if I look like this.”

“Everyone is going to judge me” “I want to be healthy and health means having to lose weight.”

“Weight gain is the worst thing that can happen to me” ETC… They will keep you stuck in the never-ending cycle of dieting and binging. Losing weight and gaining it again.

You know exactly how that feels, which is precisely why you’re reading this now!

Giving up your pursuit of chasing weight loss and working on healing your relationship with food and loving yourself doesn’t mean that you will stay forever in the body you have now. Or that you’ll forever keep putting on weight until you pop. What it does mean is that you are able to pursue – and actually achieve – health and wellness from a non-diet perspective and love yourself unconditionally. This is exactly why I do what I do,… to show women how to become the healthiest version of themselves – physically, mentally, and emotionally.

– It’s the best “work” ever! #7 Embody your dream Do this little exercise with me now… Close your eyes and visualize yourself at a social event that usually brings you anxiety. Whether the anxiety comes from the way you think your body looks, having to restrain yourself around food or not being able to stop yourself from binging, or all 3, just tune into how that feels…

Now, I want you to replace that version of you with the version of you that has done the inner work, worked on healing her relationship with food, is comfortable in her body, and loves herself unconditionally…

Avoid purposefully visualizing yourself at your “goal weight” – if your envisioned self IS at your goal weight without consciously choosing her to be so then this is ok, just allow whatever to come up, come up…

Tune into that now… how does she feel at this event? What is she thinking? How is she talking to herself?

How is she choosing to eat? How is she interacting with others? How is she confidently and comfortably standing or sitting? How does it feel to be her? Next time you notice that you’re feeling anxious, I want you to practice “being” that version of yourself. The free, self-loving version of you that is 100000% possible and available for you. Ask yourself “What would that free, self-loving version of me do?” and then do that!

Even if you can only manage to be here for 1 minute in a 3-hour social event, a minute of freedom is better than none. Then keep on practicing “being” her for as long as you can. When you keep practicing that, you are embodying that version of you, and eventually, with the right knowledge and support, you will become her! It won’t be a practice anymore, you will be living as the free, self-loving version of yourself and you won’t want to ever go back…!

If you’d like a proven step-by-step method to live in true food and body freedom and love yourself unconditionally, then consider working 1:1 with me or joining my group coaching program. I will block out 2 hours for our call so that I can get to know more about you without having to rush and we can discuss whether coaching is right for you.

Sending you all my love as always, Victoria x

Victoria is a Certified Transformational Life Coach specializing in helping high-achieving women to heal their relationship with food & their body. She is a coach, mentor, speaker, and writer; working with women from all around the globe, speaking at worldwide events, and is a writer for Live Love And Eat Magazine. Victoria has lived with eating disorders and body hate for over 20 years. (she was diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa in her early teens and then Binge Eating Disorder and Bulemia in her early twenties). Through her own personal experiences, education, certification, and countless hours spent on personal development, she holds the skills, knowledge, and empathy to guide and support you to food freedom whilst building a loving relationship with yourself and your body. Victoria has profoundly helped many women around the world to transform their lives and she knows the importance and value of constantly investing in and improving herself in order to serve her clients powerfully. Her goal is to positively impact millions of women from all around the world.

Website: https://www.victoriakleinsman.com/ Email: info@victoriakleinsman.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/victoriakleinsman Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/victoriakleinsman/ Podcast: https://anchor.fm/victoria-kleinsman “Victoria’s Secrets To Health & Happiness” on any podcats platform Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1g1H40rbSQ6Trmcha59kDg

Taking Action

By Jace Jacobs

Have you ever found yourself in a groove at the right time and the right place? A great play in sports, a better play in love, or the perfect job interview?

I love that feeling of taking action and seizing the moment. It wasn’t always that way though. I’m sure you can relate to fumbling away opportunities in your youth.

As I write these words today I’ve forgiven myself for not always taking action in my youth and I celebrate those who do.

Cheers to seizing each and every opportunity that comes your way. Remember who you are and go claim what is yours.

Namaste ☮ Jace Jacobs Appreciate Everything ~ Love Fully ~ Need Nothing

The Right Place She slowly moved her hand Dangerously close to me I leaned in just a little bit Sensing the response I’d see I said may I tell you a secret As I began to whisper in her ear Seems I’ve got a crush on you Testing the other side of fear I’m open to carry on And embrace what I feel Just curious if you feel the same Am I sensing what is real She slowly moved her hands Touching my arms and then my face I leaned in and kissed her sweet lips It was the right time and the right place

Meet Jace Jacobs! Jace Jacobs is a Happy Mindset Poet, Performer, and Creator @ jacejacobs.com. Jace is an author and spoken word poetry performer. His Happy Mindset Poetry books are available on Amazon or via jacejacobs.com.

Jace enjoys helping cool souls raise their vibrational state so they can experience more confidence and clarity in their life.Appreciate Everything ~ Love Fully ~ Need Nothing#HappyMindsetPoetryVisit the social media links below for video performances of spoken word rhyming happy mindset poetry. https://www.facebook.com/jacewjacobs/ https://www.youtube.com/jacejacobs https://www.instagram.com/jacejacobs https://twitter.com/jacejacobs

JULY POEMS

BY SKYLAR SNOW POETRY August 1st-7th -World breastfeeding week- We discover the huge benefits of breastfeeding.

August 8th -International cat day- A celebration of all our feline friends!

August 19th-World photo day- A worldwide celebration of the craft, art, history, and science of photography.

Share your awesome photos on social media and use the tag #WorldPhotographyDay August 24th -International dog day- A day to celebrate man's best friend!

July 24th-August 30th -National finishing month- An encouragement for everyone to try fishing.

Skylar Snow Poetry is a Poetry and blog writer.

Aspirations to study Forensic Psychology as a degree. deartherapyblog.wordpress.com https://www.instagram.com/deartherapy/

-Breastfeeding is best feedingBy Skylar Snow Poetry Breast milk is so perfectly designed, Prevents infections and diseases, Breast milk is always there and so kind, A bond created, a world of sun that never freezes.

Prevents obesity and sudden infant death syndrome, Including cardiovascular disease in adulthood, Preventing cancer, osteoporosis known as weak bone, To breastfeed does the mother and the baby the world of good.

-Meow celebrationBy Skylar Snow Poetry

Feline friends, they're everywhere, Meowing and purring without a care, A kitten or cat that presents a doting stare, Best friends like an apple and a pear,

Big eyes, long whiskers, lifetime of love, Affection to be first and always put above, For the cat loves you even in the rough, Petting a cat will never be enough,

Perfect paws, attitude with loyalty, A cat by your side is a feline of royalty, Every cat deserves the upmost spoilty, Cats are to be celebrated for they are wonderful and free.

-A photo of a thousand virtuesBy Skylar Snow Poetry Take a photo, enjoy the art, History and science are no longer worlds apart, It's such a beautiful craft, To take a photo that will always last,

Snap, snap, enjoying the crystal clear view, Taking photo's of the world including all the love we do, Nature and nurture within one single shot, A picture is a thousand words to never be forgot,

Photography is a worlwind wonder, Capture the storm and the intrusive thunder, Taking peace and tranquility within a photo, Hope and determination of the world we'll never let go.

-Precious barks in the nightBy Skylar Snow Poetry

Woof woof, another dog barks for joy, To play with their favourite chew toy, Full of cuddles and appreciation, Offering you love from an entire nation,

Paws, toe beans, jaws that growl, When your not there they begin to prowl, Always there to see you at your best or worst, A dog's love is never to be a curse,

Eyes that are filled with their wonderus soul, Loving you no matter how life takes it's toll, A dog is a man's best friend, Hand in paw until the very end.

-Fishing for freedomBy Skylar Snow Poetry

Enjoy trying fishing with a friend or family, Such peace in fishing it can never be a tragedy, Calm with a zen of natural vibe, Catching fish can make you feel so alive,

Hook and bait, sun or rain, To be fishing life won't ever be the same, A new kind of peace can be found, Sitting on a camping chair or the ground,

They just keep swimming, ready to be caught, A fun thing to do when they remain to be saught, Perfect to fish for a fun time of better, You can still enjoy it as the skies get wetter.

WHAT'S COOKING

Strawberry Summer Salad

By Bernadine Otto

The Ingredients 1 cup sliced strawberries 1 cup of thinly sliced red onion 5 cups baby spinach leaves 3 cups mixed greens ¼ cup chopped pecans ¼ cup feta cheese crumbles

The Method Add all ingredients to a salad bowl. Sprinkle with feta cheese. Serve with salad dressing of your choice

Turkey Romaine Salad

By Debra Letchworth

This salad came about from wanting to put together a quick & easy supper on a hot day. I went to the fridge and pantry to see what I had on hand.

Romaine? Check. Sliced turkey? Check. Salad dressing? I went to one of my stand-by dressings – the Harissa Tahini variety. Mushrooms? Check.

And something crunchy? There were the roasted broad beans I’d recently discovered.

The Ingredients 1 head romaine lettuce 4 slices roasted turkey, chopped 1 portabella mushroom, diced 2 Tbsp harissa tahini salad dressing 2 Tbsp raw sauerkraut 2 Tbsp toasted broad beans

The Method Chop romaine lettuce and portabella mushrooms and place in a large bowl. Add dressing and stir until thoroughly mixed. Chop turkey slices. Top salad with sauerkraut, turkey, and broad beans.

Serve with crackers, fruit, and yogurt and savor the flavor combinations.

Harissa Tahini Salad Dressing

By Debra Letchworth

The Ingredients 2 Tbsp tahini 2 tsp harissa sauce Juice of 1 small or 1/2 large lemon Water to make desired consistency -typically I use 2-3 teaspoonfuls

The Method Measure out all ingredients into a small bowl.

Stir until smooth. Pour on salad.

Yes, it's that simple.

“Kindness is always beautiful" - Unknown