Bible Studies for Life - Students (Leader) by LifeWay Christian Resources

BIBLE

STUDIES FOR LIFE

FALL 2013 | LEADER GUIDE RONNIE FLOYD | GENERAL EDITOR

PRESSURE POINTS RELATIONSHIPS COLLIDE

SESSION 1

THE PRESSURE OF TRIALS

The Point Joyful trust in God will get you through any trial.

The Bible Meets Life Life is filled with struggles. Maybe you’ve heard the saying, “when life gives you a lemon, just make lemonade,” but that’s a lot easier said than done. When you’re going through a trial in your life, the last thing you want to hear is a cheesy saying. You need real help and a real understanding of God’s purpose for your struggle. The Bible is full of people who were dealt hard hands in life, but through faith and perseverance they trusted God. In the book of James we find a game plan for overcoming our trials and turning them into joy.

The Passage James 1:1-4

The Setting The book of James is a letter (an epistle), and James is clearly identified as the author in the greeting. Epistles were often used as a means of spurring the recipients to change a behavior or a belief in response to the authority and guidance of the sender.

1 SESSION 1

WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY? James 1:1-4 (HCSB): James, a slave of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ: To the 12 tribes in the Dispersion. Greetings.

Consider it a great joy, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials,

knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.

But endurance must do its complete work, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing.

Key Words SLAVE (v. 1) Because Jesus is God, He has the right to tell us what to do and how to do it. ENDURANCE (v. 3) Endurance is steadfastness, faithfulness, and being true to the end. God is the object of and guide for loyal persistence. MATURE AND COMPLETE (v. 4) The phrase describes that which has reached the end desire, is fully developed, and functions at full capacity with nothing unused.

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 2

ENGAGE

(15 MINUTES)

GET INTO THE STUDY ENGAGE: Begin the session with one or more of the Engage options on the next page. GUIDE: After you have created the experience with the Engage options, invite group members to turn their attention to the picture on page 2 of the Personal Study Guide (PSG). SAY: “One of the pressures we all face is trials. Everyone seems to have advice for us when we are going through tough times.” DISCUSS: Have students discuss the question at the bottom of page 2 of the PSG: “What’s the last thing you want somone to say to you when you’re struggling?” Encourage students to explain why they chose their answer. Allow time for each student to respond (a response now will encourage them to respond to other questions later in the study). GUIDE: Call attention to The Point on page 3 of the PSG. Explain that this is the key idea to keep in mind as the session is studied in this group session (it appears

THE POINT

at the top of each session page).

Joyful trust in God will get you through any trial.

ASK: Ask for a volunteer to read aloud each of the paragraphs in The Bible Meets Life on page 3 of the PSG (assign a paragraph per volunteer if group size permits). READ: James 1:1-4 (page 4 of the PSG). PRAY: Transition into the Bible study by pausing to thank God for His Word and to ask Him to help your group choose to trust God in the midst of trials.

3 SESSION 1

Engage Options YY Lead with Action

Lead your students in a game of Jenga® (bring your own Jenga or ask if any of your group members have one you can use for the session). Play a normal game one turn each and then apply the following “trials” one at a time as the game progresses (remind students they may use only one hand in Jenga). 1. Add a 6-second timer to each person’s turn. 2. Students must alternate which hand they use to play. 3. Students may not use their thumb while playing. After the game, award the winner a prize if you’d like or simply transition to the session and say: “Pressure can get to you and when you add trials to pressure, life can get pretty tough. Let’s look at what the Bible teaches us about facing trials.”

YY Lead with Atmosphere

OPTION: Build a giant Jenga set out of 2x4s. You will need fifty-four 10 and 1/2 inch long pieces to make this work. You can typically purchase the 2x4s and have them cut at your local home supply store.

Arrive before your students if possible and place a piece of paper on each chair that says: “Today every student will sing a karaoke song. Please circle the song you will sing and hand it in to your leader.” List several songs you think fit your group. When it’s time for your group to begin, say, “We won’t actually be doing any karaoke today. Some of you may have been nervous about singing in public. This kind of pressure builds up in our life when we are challenged to do something that makes us uncomfortable. Let’s look at what the Bible tells us about dealing with pressure and specifically, trials.”

YY Lead with Media

Show a video of rubber bands making a watermelon explode. Say: “Pressure is

OPTION: One of the best videos of rubber bands making a watermelon explode is in slow motion (always watch any video you use prior to meeting to ensure it is appropriate for your group and church).

something we all face and it grows stronger when we face trials. Just like each rubber band added additional pressure until the watermelon exploded, trials can build up the pressure in our lives. Let’s look at what the Bible teaches us about pressure and trials.”

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 4

IMPART

(10 MINUTES)

STUDY THE BIBLE

The Point: Joyful trust in God will get you through any trial.

TIP: There is no quick fix for trials and struggles. A misconception is that Christians won’t have to face trials and struggles in their life. Ensure that students understand that following Jesus guarantees that we will face trials.

JAMES 1:1-2 DISCUSS: Have students respond to the question at the bottom of page 3 of the PSG: “Who in your life is good at making the best out of bad situations?” SCRIPTURE: 1 James, a slave of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ: To the 12 tribes in the Dispersion. Greetings. 2 Consider it a great joy, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials. —James 1:1-2 SAY: “It’s not a question of if, but when we encounter trials. Let’s take a look at the various types of trials we face.” GUIDE: Call attention to the four types of trials on page 5 of the PSG (1. Temptation, 2. Sickness, 3. Persecution, 4. Trouble). Lead students to discuss each of them. SAY: “James points us to the phrase, ‘consider it a great joy,’ as the appropriate response to trials we face.” DISCUSS: Lead group members to discuss the question on page 5 of the PSG: “What keeps joy from being your first response when trials feel overwhelming?”

TIP: If you get “I don’t know” as a response to discussion questions, try to share your own answers and have students respond. Use this as a last resort as you always want students to maximize discussion if possible.

5 SESSION 1

GUIDE: Draw attention to the way we can consider it a joy to walk through trials. Discuss each of the three bullet points on page 5 of the PSG. SUMMARIZE: Recap that the Bible is clear that we are to trust God in our trials and have an attitude of joy.

Commentary JAMES 1:1-2 One problem with encountering trials is that you aren’t expecting them. You fall into a situation or circumstance that was unforeseen and it surrounds you. James tells us trials are inevitable. It’s not if you encounter them, but when you encounter them. It‘s just a matter of time. No Christian should presume that their life is going to be problem free. Trials are varied. They come in all shapes and sizes. 1. Temptation—An enticement to sin, whether it’s a click on a computer screen, a mean word, or an unhealthy appetite (we will dig on this more next week).

TIP: Students need to know that life will be filled with trials. Looking at trials as a means for spiritual growth can change our attitude toward them as we embrace Christ’s maturing of our faith.

2. Sickness—Sometimes it’s not your sickness, but the sickness of another person. 3. Persecution—Suffering for Christ is to be expected for a believer. 4. Trouble—It could be any adversity, affliction, or circumstances sent by God—or allowed by Him—to test or prove your faith, holiness, or character. Such troubles can be financial hardship, bad news, difficult people, hard circumstances, troubled relationships, broken down cars, layoffs, or loud dogs living next door. Joy isn’t typically our first response, so how do we get to a joyful attitude when dealing with the pressure of trials? James actually commands Christians to: “Consider it a great joy…”. Joy is a careful and deliberate decision. Don’t rely on your inner feelings or emotions; instead rely on God. Think about what God is asking you to do in the midst of your trial. YYSee the trial through His eyes. YYLet Him manage your feelings.

TIP: Make sure to let students know that joy is the ultimate goal in trials, but we are all aware that it is a difficult first choice. Christ can empower us to make it our first choice —even when it doesn’t feel like it.

YYListen for what He’s telling you to do. Then do it.

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 6

IMPART

(10 MINUTES)

STUDY THE BIBLE

The Point: Joyful trust in God will get you through any trial.

JAMES 1:3 SCRIPTURE: 3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. —James 1:3 DO: Have group members complete the Action Point titled What Would You

ACTION POINT

Do? on page 6 of the PSG. Allow time for group members to share their insights. WHAT WOULD YOU DO? A friend or family member has been diagnosed with a serious illness. 1. Joy and trust in God could benefit me by: 2. Joy and trust in God could benefit this friend or family member by: 3. Joy and trust in God could benefit others by: DISCUSS: Lead students to discuss the question on page 6 of the PSG: “What are some emotions you feel when you’re going through a trial?” TIP: Ask students for their input and opinion. Always value their answers but never be afraid to correct error or point to the truth in the Word.

7 SESSION 1

GUIDE: Draw attention to the Tony Dungy quote on page 6 of the PSG. Read it and have students discuss what they think it means. SAY: “Our faith is being tested the most during trials. God accomplishes something very specific through trials in our life: patience and kindness that endures.”

Commentary JAMES 1:3 How do I consider it joy in the middle of a trial? By knowing what God will do as a result of the trial. The testing of your faith is for approval. The root concept is that you are tested for the purpose of being accepted, received, and welcomed by God. What is being tested is your faith. This isn’t a test of your personal strength or wisdom, but it is a test of your faith in the strength and wisdom of God to see you through. Faith is a muscle that must be exercised in order to gain strength. The

TIP: Ensure that students know that God is not arbitrarily handing out tests of faith. He is building Christians to glorify His name and mature in their pursuit of Christ.

less you use faith, the easier it is to lose faith. The testing results in something. God never arbitrarily punks you with a test for no reason. Testing of your faith always prepares and works effectively to accomplish something very specific. God’s goal in testing is endurance. He is developing staying power in you. The word endure means to remain under. We sometimes call it perseverance, faithfulness, or steadfastness, but it is God’s work of developing your spiritual muscle and resolve to stand firm. You become unswerving from His deliberate purpose and your loyalty to faith even in the midst of the greatest trials and sufferings. Remember the story Jesus told about the different soils (Luke 8:4-15)? A lot of people hear the word, some even with great emotional reaction. But in the end, the only seed that was fruitful was the seed that endured in the soil. If you are ever going to bear fruit in your Christian life, then perseverance and staying

TIP: Make the connection between being a Christian and growing through trials versus those without Christ and the trials they face. This distinction can be helpful in understanding Christ’s role in allowing trials in our life.

power are not optional. If you are being tested it means: 1. You are a child of God and you have faith that can be tested. 2. You have a faith worth developing and refining in God’s eyes. 3. God has a plan to strengthen you, prepare you, and ultimately to welcome you. 4. You have the assurance of the presence of God. Because when He refines us, He never abandons us.

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 8

IMPART

(10 MINUTES)

STUDY THE BIBLE

The Point: Joyful trust in God will get you through any trial.

JAMES 1:4 DISCUSS: Ask students to answer the question at the top of page 7 of the PSG: “How have you been encouraged by the way someone you know has responded during a trial?” SCRIPTURE: 4 But endurance must do its complete work, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing. —James 1:4 GUIDE: Read James 1:4 and make the connection between trials and the work of endurance: maturity, completeness, and lacking nothing. EXPLAIN: Help students walk through the process of endurance and the decisions TIP: When discussing topics about life, try to relate the issue to something students face everyday.

they have to make regarding trials found in the paragraph on page 7 of the PSG. DISCUSS: Ask students to talk through the different choices they have when it comes to endurance and trials: the pain of the trial or the pointless pain of regret and grief. YY I don’t have to study. I can avoid that pain, but then I won’t pass and that will

bring pain of its own. YY I don’t have to lift weights in the off season, but I don’t have to win either. YY I don’t have to let God complete me, but I’d miss out on all of

my purpose in life.

9 SESSION 1

Commentary JAMES 1:4 We are to let endurance do its work in our lives. That work is a command that is to be heeded in an ongoing and constant basis. When you submit to the process of endurance and allow the shaping and strengthening of your faith, the goal is ultimately reached: completeness, perfection. YY I have to consent to let endurance shape and mold my faith until its

work is complete. YY I can choose to take the easy road and avoid the pain of the process of

building endurance through trials. I can run from it and try to escape it in favor of a trial-free life. Or I can embrace the work of endurance in my life and become open, pliable, humble, and teachable. Which is less painful? Both paths can be painful, but one brings about pointless pain and wasted grief. You go from God-inflicted pain that has a purpose to self-

TIP: The trials that students face may seem shallow to you depending on your stage of life. But to them these struggles are a major issue. Empathize with them as you walk them through these issues.

inflicted pain that amounts to heartache. But the pain endured through trials is both positive and progressive, moving you toward a happy and rewarding end. YY You can avoid the “pain” of study, but in doing so you also avoid

passing the class. YY You can avoid the “pain” of working, but in doing so you miss out on

being able to eat. YY You can avoid the “pain” of lifting weights in athletic training, but in

doing so you miss out on becoming a winning athlete. The purpose of surrendering to God’s trials and the effect He is working to produce is that you might become perfect, complete, and lacking in nothing. God is working around your life so that He can work something in and through your life. His desire is that you be 100 percent complete in Him. YY Perfect—Having reached its end, complete, mature, fully developed. YY Complete—Fully developed, running at full capacity with nothing unused. YY Lacking Nothing—Nothing left out or left behind. Nothing inferior. You are

TIP: Help students see that there is a difference between pain with a purpose and pain that amounts to heartache as a result of our unwillingness to deal with it biblically.

fully equipped and prepared.

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 10

IMPACT

(10 MINUTES)

APPLY IT TIP: Encourage students to take the next step and follow through with one or both Live It Out activities this week. Contact them midweek with a text, email, or call, and encourage them as they apply what they have learned.

READ: Ask for a volunteer to read aloud the three ways we can choose joy in the midst of a trial in Apply It (page 8 of the PSG). GUIDE: Lead group members to consider which of the three suggested responses to the Bible study most closely applies to them and their current circumstances.   ASK: “Which of these responses do you personally need to focus on most as you live this session out?” Allow time for responses.

WRAP UP READ: Call for a volunteer to read the last two paragraphs on page 8 at the end of Apply It. Remember, Jesus can empower you to experience joy in the midst of trials and build spiritual endurance in your life as a result. GUIDE: Challenge your group to complete one or both of the Live it Out activities for the week. Let them know you will discuss them next time you meet.

11 SESSION 1

ONE CONVERSATION™

Use these discussion starters to help foster a spiritual conversation with your family.

THE BIBLE MEETS LIFE: Life is filled with struggles. Maybe you’ve heard the saying, “when life gives you a lemon, just make lemonade,” but that’s a lot easier said than done. When you’re going through a trial in your life, the last thing you want to hear is a cheesy saying. You need real help and a real understanding of God’s purpose for your struggle. In the book of James we discover how, through Christ, we can overcome our trials and turn them into joy.

JAMES 1:1-4 Concept: Good Attitudes

PRESCHOOL MATTHEW 5:1-12

LIFE POINT: We can trust God. • What are some ways that Jesus showed kindness to people? • Who is kind to you? • How can you show kindness to other people?

LIVE IT OUT: Think of different reactions to scenarios your child has faced. Tell those reactions to your preschooler, and ask him to say whether each action shows a good attitude or bad attitude. Help your child think about how Jesus was kind. Talk together about one person he can show kindness to. Help him think of a way to show kindness to someone and to carry it out.

KIDS MATTHEW 5:1-12 LIFE POINT: Keep a good attitude at all times. • Why did Jesus say you should be blessed when people persecute you? • Are you ever teased because of your Christian beliefs?

LIVE IT OUT: Sit down with your child, and make a list of attitudes, both good and bad. Ask your child to draw a facial expresssion that a person with each of those attitudes might have. Remind your child this week that when he faces a problem to ask himself what he thinks Jesus’ attitude would be when dealing with that problem.

STUDENTS JAMES 1:1-4 LIFE POINT: Joyful trust in God will get you through any trial. • What’s a struggle we’ve faced together as a family? • Are you struggling with anything right now I can help you with? Discuss the following quote: “You can’t always control circumstances. However, you can always control your attitude, approach, and response.”1 —Tony Dungy 1. Tony Dungy, Whitaker, Quiet Strength: The Principles, Practices, & Priorities of a Winning Life (Carol Stream, IL: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., 2007), 16.

LIVE IT OUT: Your student has been encouraged to do one or both Live It Out activities in the personal study guide. Ask if he has chosen to do either of the activities. If so, help by: If he plans to complete “Connect the Dots” and reflect on how to respond to trials: • Remind your student that God uses trials for our good. • Help him think of the best way to respond to specific trials he may face. If he plans to do “Endurance” and choose a reminder of the purpose of trials: • Let him help you pick a visual reminder of endurance. • Tell him about how God has strengthened you through trials.

SESSION 2

THE PRESSURE OF TEMPTATION

The Point God won’t tempt me, but He will provide a way to resist temptation.

The Bible Meets Life For students, temptation may be as simple as feeling pressure to tell a lie to avoid trouble or peek over a classmate’s shoulder to get an answer for a test. They can feel the pressure to buy the latest gadget or wear a certain brand of clothing just to feel accepted by their friends. But there’s a downside. Giving in to temptation leads them to a place they don’t want to be. The apostle James helps us understand the reality that temptation is nothing more than an invitation to evil, an opportunity to do wrong based on a promise of some pleasure or perceived gain.

The Passage James 1:13-18

1 SESSION 2

WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY? James 1:13-18 (HCSB): 13

o one undergoing a trial should say, “I am being tempted by N God.” For God is not tempted by evil, and He Himself doesn’t tempt anyone.

ut each person is tempted when he is drawn away and B enticed by his own evil desires.

T hen after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin, and when sin is fully grown, it gives birth to death.

Don’t be deceived, my dearly loved brothers.

E very generous act and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights; with Him there is no variation or shadow cast by turning.

By His own choice, He gave us a new birth by the message of truth so that we would be the firstfruits of His creatures.

Key Words TRIAL AND EACH VARIATION OF TEMPT (Jas. 1:13-14; except in the statement that God is not tempted)—translate the Greek verb from which comes the noun, “trials” (Jas. 1:2; see previous lesson). The translations highlight both the connection and the distinction between trials and temptations. In these verses James shifts his meaning from hardships to the inner experience of enticement to sin. TEMPTED (Jas. 1:14; ESV omits “evil”)—The single Greek word means a longing or desire. While it can be used of a good or natural desire, in the New Testament it most frequently refers to desiring that which is forbidden, as the context in James reflects. Thus, evil desires are not only those “big” lusts but also the longing for any forbidden thing. BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 2

ENGAGE

(15 MINUTES)

GET INTO THE STUDY ENGAGE: Begin the session with one or more of the Engage options on the next page. GUIDE: After you have created the experience with the Engage options, invite group members to turn their attention to the picture on page 2 of the Personal Study Guide (pictured to the right). SAY: “We’ve all felt the pressures of temptation, and some are stronger than others.” DISCUSS: Have students discuss the question at the bottom of page 2 of the PSG: “In what school subject are you most tempted to cheat?” Encourage students to tell why they chose their answer. Allow time for each student to respond (a response now will encourage them to respond to other questions later in the study). GUIDE: Call attention to The Point on page 3 of the PSG. Explain that this is the

THE POINT

key idea to keep in mind as the lesson is studied in this group session.

God won’t tempt me, but He will provide a way to resist temptation.

ASK: Ask for a volunteer to read aloud each of the paragraphs in The Bible Meets Life on page 3 of the PSG. (Assign a paragraph per volunteer if group size permits) READ: James 1:13-18 (page 4 of the PSG) PRAY: Transition into the Bible study by pausing to thank God for His Word and to ask Him to help your group choose to obey God in the midst of temptation.

3 SESSION 2

Engage Options YY Lead with Action

Bring small containers like paper sacks or boxes to the meeting space, one per group member. Put a little Monopoly money or small change in a couple of them and some random items like napkins or pens in the others. Have donuts or another snack students would enjoy available when your group arrives. Let the group know you’re going to hand out snacks, but before they eat you have an offer for them. Show them the containers you have prepared (this works best if they are all set up on display). Ask students if they would like to trade their snack for what is in one of the containers. They get to choose which container, but they have to give up their snack. Mention that there is money in some of the containers. Once every student has made their choice, allow them to open their

OPTION: Ask a few students to play as game show hosts, presenting the containers and talking through what each person “wins” when they trade for a container.

container. After the disappointment settles, let them have their snacks back and say: “We are all tempted by different things. Some of you were tempted to take what was in the container without knowing what you would get. Temptation always offers us something we think is worth the risk. But, just like what we found in the containers, temptation never truly delivers and we end up disappointed.”

YY Lead with Atmosphere

Make two or three “WET PAINT” signs on poster board and hang them on the walls prior to your meeting. As students enter watch their response to the signs (don’t mention them or draw attention to them). Start the lesson by asking students about the signs. Did anyone touch the wall? Was anyone curious about the “new paint”? Say, “Isn’t it interesting that a WET PAINT sign can tempt some to touch the area and see, while others are content to remain curious. Today we are going to look at how temptation works and how we can fight it.”

YY Lead with Media

OPTION: Search for a video of Ken Basin answering the million dollar question wrong on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire. (Always watch any video you use prior to meeting to ensure it is appropriate for your group and church.)

Show a video of a game show moment when someone risked it all and lost what they had. After watching, say: “Temptation works differently for different people and for this contestant, it was worth risking a lot of money. Today we’re going to take a look at how temptation works and what we can do to fight it.”

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 4

IMPART

(10 MINUTES)

STUDY THE BIBLE

TIP: Temptation works so well because it makes some big promises. Make sure students understand that the promises of temptation are lies. While they may seem good for awhile, they ultimately work to turn us away from God.

The Point: God won’t tempt me, but He will provide a way to resist temptation.

JAMES 1:13 DISCUSS: Have students respond to the question at the top of page 5 of the PSG: “Why do we give in to temptation?” SCRIPTURE: 13 No one undergoing a trial should say, “I am being tempted by God.” For God is not tempted by evil, and He Himself doesn’t tempt anyone. —James 1:13 SAY: “Temptation makes promises that it can’t keep. Let’s look at a couple.” GUIDE: Call attention to the two promises of temptation on page 5 of the PSG (1. gain 2. you won’t get hurt). Allow students to respond to each. DISCUSS: Lead group members to discuss the question on page 5 of the PSG: “Where do you think temptation comes from?” GUIDE: Direct your group to read the statements Scripture makes about

TIP: Use the Share This box as a way to encourage interaction between what they are learning and social networks like Twitter, Facebook, Google+, etc..

temptation on page 5 of the PSG (1. Temptation is inevitable 2. Temptation never comes from God). SAY: “These two statements from the Bible impact the way we respond to temptation.” DISCUSS: Lead students to discuss the impact these truths have on our response to temptation. SHARE THIS: Point students to the Share This box on page 5 of the PSG. Explain that these boxes are there for them to make a brief note about something they feel is worthy of sharing from the session via social media. Encourage them to do so as you work through the session.

5 SESSION 2

Commentary JAMES 1:13 Trials and temptation are not the same. Trials bring hardship, difficulty, or an ordeal. There is not anything necessarily good or pleasurable about a trial. During his trial, Job lost everything and there was nothing pleasurable about his experience. Abraham faced a test unlike any other when he was asked to sacrifice his son, Isaac (Gen. 22). He faced a test of his faith, but there was nothing about it that appealed to him in his flesh. The pressure from temptation, though, comes from its appeal. Temptation is typically characterized by a couple of promises: 1. Temptation always promises you some gain. It may be fun, more money,

TIP: The difference between a trial and temptation is that temptation offers a perceived pleasure or gain, whereas a trial is characterized by hardship and difficulty.

pleasure, satisfaction, or an appeased palate. The grass of temptation will always appear green. 2. Temptation will also promise that you won’t get hurt. You can get away with it, nobody will know, or it’s no big deal. You won’t get burned like others. You are different. You can handle it. Temptation promises that you are going to be much better off because you indulge. Temptation makes promises it can’t deliver because they’re not true, but James makes two statements that are true: 1. Temptation is inevitable. It’s not a matter of if you are tempted, but when you are tempted. Temptation comes to all of us. It came to Jesus in the wilderness, in the garden of Gethsemane, and at many other times in between. Temptation comes to a monk in a monastery as surely as it comes to a mom who stays at home with her kids. None of us are exempt from the reality of temptation. 2. Temptation never comes from God. Regardless of the type of temptation you face, one thing is certain: God isn’t the source of it. We know this to be true because of the nature of God. First, James 1:13 tells us God is not able to be tempted. The Greek for this Scripture literally means that God is “untemptable.” God is holy and fully self-sufficient. There is nothing God

TIP: Everyone is tempted, regardless of who you are. Knowing this will help you determine the best method for dealing with the temptations you face in life.

lacks or needs, so no offer from the evil one appeals to God. Second, God is not able to tempt us because He is good, loving, holy, and righteous. He cannot and will not pressure us to do anything contrary to His character.

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 6

IMPART

(10 MINUTES)

STUDY THE BIBLE

The Point: God won’t tempt me, but He will provide a way to resist temptation.

JAMES 1:14-15 SCRIPTURE: 14 But each person is tempted when he is drawn away and enticed by his own evil desires. 15 Then after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin, and when sin is fully grown, it gives birth to death. —James 1:14-15 GUIDE: Draw attention to the two points on page 6 of the PSG (1. Temptation is unique to each individual 2. Temptation always follows the same predictable process). SAY: “Because temptation is unique to each individual, a temptation for me may not be a temptation for you. But whatever your temptation is, the process of being tempted is the same for all of us.” DISCUSS: Allow students to respond to the statement above and then invite them to answer the main question on page 6 of the PSG: “When does desiring a good thing become a temptation?” DO: Have group members complete the Action Point titled Tempted? on page 6 of the PSG. Allow time for group members to share their insights. ACTION POINT

TIP: Your group will learn more if they’re involved with the session. Ask them to read, respond, and discuss.

Tempted? You want to see a movie your parents have told you not to watch. You’re tempted to tell them you are seeing something else so you can go. 1. What do you gain by disobeying your parents in this situation? 2. What do you lose by disobeying your parents in this situation?

7 SESSION 2

Commentary JAMES 1:14-15 Temptation is unique to each individual. Some may be tempted by chocolate cake, others by a bag of chips. We all experience temptation and we experience the same types of temptation (1 Cor. 10:13), but the specifics of our temptations can be as unique as each individual. James says temptation comes when each of us is carried off by our own lusts and desires. What is a temptation for me may not be a temptation for you. Some people are easily tempted to react with anger to a situation; others never get angry. Some

TIP: Understanding that temptation customizes itself to our individual desires and lusts equips and encourages us to help each other as we struggle.

people are easily tempted by sexual images; others can easily look away. Some of us are tempted by food to engage in overeating and gluttony, and others of us can walk away after a salad and an apple. There are temptations that you face that those around you don’t battle. Temptation always follows the same predictable process. James outlined a process from the world of fishing. An angler takes bait and throws it in front of an unsuspecting bass under a log. The fish is just minding his own business and isn’t looking to hurt anyone or to get hurt. But he does have a natural urge to eat. It’s a good urge. It’s part of life. But when the worm is thrown in his face, his desire is awakened and he decides he would really like to eat. So he swims out from the safety of his log, and in one giant gulp, swallows the bait. It’s at that point the fish realizes that he’s been duped and he’s no longer in control. He is being pulled against his will in the direction of the angler’s boat, the net, the cooler, and ultimately the oven. So what kind of bait is used on you? James says we are tempted when we get

TIP: Although temptation uses the same predictable process every time, we still fall for it. Knowing the process can help us understand how to fight temptation.

carried away and enticed by lust. You have a desire—maybe even a God-given desire—for food, friends, or approval. These things aren’t bad in and of themselves, but when the desire consumes us, it’s wrong. Desire out of control is deadly. Satan tempts us to get carried away by our lusts (Mark 4:19, Col. 3:5, Gal. 5:24, 1 Tim. 6:9, 2 Tim. 2:22; 4:3, 1 Pet. 1:14, 1 John 2:16-17).

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 8

IMPART

(10 MINUTES)

STUDY THE BIBLE

The Point: God won’t tempt me, but He will provide a way to resist temptation.

JAMES 1:16-18 SCRIPTURE:

Don’t be deceived, my dearly loved brothers. 17 Every generous

act and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights; with Him there is no variation or shadow cast by turning. 18 By His own choice, He gave us a new birth by the message of truth so that we would be the firstfruits of His creatures. —James 1:16-18 GUIDE: Read James 1:16-18 and make the connection between God as the giver of every good thing we have and our temptation to make those things our priority. DISCUSS: Invite group members to respond to the question on page 7 of the PSG: “How can we fight temptation before it strikes?” EXPLAIN: Help group members grasp a few ways we can battle temptation listed TIP: Be mindful that this week’s topic is very personal. Never make a student share if they don’t want to.

on page 8 in the PSG. (Also located in the commentary on the next page.) 1. A relationship with Christ. Because of who we are in Christ, we can resist temptation through the power of the Holy Spirit.. 2. God’s Word. We can use scripture to respond to the pressures of temptation. 3. An escape route. God will provide a way out for us as we stand against temptation and the pressures associated with it. SUMMARIZE: Read the quote by C. S. Lewis at the top of page 8 of the PSG (“Only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is.”) Challenge students to explain why this quote is true. Add your own personal story or insights about temptations you have faced or overcome in your life.

9 SESSION 2

Commentary JAMES 1:16-18 We see in James 1:16-18 that God is the giver of every perfect gift. As the bestower of good things on His children, God is communicating His desire to help us and care for us no matter what temptations we may face. When the good things that God gives us become our priority over Him, we are tempted to make them our focus. The pressure of temptation is great, especially in this critical time in the lives of students. So how do we deal with the pressure of temptation? Consider the good and perfect gifts God gives us. Instead of leading us to evil, God provides what we need to do good and live righteously. Let’s consider just three.

TIP: It’s key for students to understand that God equips us to combat temptation. It is His desire that we win the battle with our desires and lusts.

1. A relationship with Christ. Too many of us think we are helpless to resist temptation. But you are a child of God—a saint—and you are called to be holy and blameless. You are a child of the King with full authority over the enemy and with the power of Christ in You. Jesus Christ takes up residence in your life and empowers you by His Holy Spirit. Because you are a child of God, sin is not an option. So repent and live like a Christ-follower. 2. God’s Word. When Jesus was tempted, He used Scripture to respond to the pressure of temptation. Memorize God’s Word and hide it in your heart. 3. An escape route. One of God’s gifts to us is the promise from 1 Corinthians 10:13. God will provide a way of escape and help us stand up to anything we face. God’s escape route may be a telephone ringing, a whisper in your conscience, or a friend’s accountability. Don’t walk past God’s opportunity to bail out. Call out to the Spirit of Christ inside of you for help.

TIP: Express the importance of using God’s Word to defeat the lure of temptation. Point students to Psalm 119:11 for a clear understanding of Scripture.

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 10

IMPACT

(10 MINUTES)

APPLY IT TIP: Make sure everyone in the group has decided on their next step. Encourage them to put what they have learned in the session into practice this week. Encourage them through the week with an email, text, or phone call.

READ: Ask for three volunteers to read aloud one of the three suggested ways to apply this study in Apply It (page 8 of the PSG). GUIDE: Lead group members to consider which one of the three suggested responses to the Bible study most closely applies to them and their current circumstances.   ASK: “Why did you choose the one you did, and how does it fit your life situation right now?” Allow time for responses.

WRAP UP READ: Call for a volunteer to read the last paragraph on page 8 at the end of Apply It: Remember, sin may offer temporary pleasure, but we will experience permanent consequences when we give in to temptation. God desires for us to defeat our temptations through His power and experience life at its fullest. GUIDE: Challenge your group to complete the Live it Out options for the week. Have them turn to page 9 and 10 of the PSG and look over both options. Explain that each option will help them put into action what they have learned in the session. Let them know you will discuss them next time you meet.

11 SESSION 2

ONE CONVERSATION™

Use these discussion starters to help foster a spiritual conversation with your family.

THE BIBLE MEETS LIFE: Temptation is a reality for all of us. Even Jesus was tempted. We can’t avoid it, but we don’t have to give into it. The Book of James helps us understand that God does not tempt us, but He will provide a way to resist temptation. Because of the work Christ has done on our behalf, we can see temptation for what it is and through Him we can overcome any temptation.

JAMES 1:13-18 Concept: Temptation

PRESCHOOL MATTHEW 5:1-3 LIFE POINT: God provides for us. • What are some ways God provides for you? • How can you thank God for providing you the things you need, like the Bible? • How does the Bible help you make good choices?

LIVE IT OUT: Look around your house and name all the things that God provides for you, like the Bible, food, clothes, and water to drink. Pray and thank God for giving us the Bible to help us make good choices. Thank God for giving us Jesus, who died for us and who forgives us when we make bad choices.

KIDS MATTHEW 4:1-11 LIFE POINT: Resist temptation by following Jesus’ example. • How did Jesus respond when the devil tempted Him to sin? • What are some ways that you are tempted? • Can you think of a verse that will help you when you are tempted?

LIVE IT OUT: List several temptations you face regularly. Consider what your response will be when faced with those challenges this week. Use James 2:8 to remind you that temptations can be turned around to produce good. Recognize that Jesus was tempted just like we are, yet never sinned. Thank Him for His perfect life and His death in our place.

STUDENTS JAMES 1:13-18 LIFE POINT: God will not tempt me, but He will provide a way to resist temptation. • What leads to temptation? • Do you have any questions for me about how I face temptation? • What can I do to help you with the things that tempt you? Have a conversation around this quote: “Only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is.”1 —C.S. Lewis

LIVE IT OUT: Your student has been encouraged to do one or both Live It Out activities in the personal study guide. If she has chosen to do either one, help your student by: If she plans to complete “Focus” and memorize Proverbs 4:25: • Ask your student to recite the verse to you during the week. If she hasn’t memorized it, encourage her. • Memorize the verse with your student. If she plans to do “Team Up” to find an accountability partner: • Encourage your student if she has yet to find an accountability partner. • If you have had a positive accountability partner experience, share it with your student.

1. C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity (New York, NY: HarperCollins, 1980), 142.

SESSION 3

STAND DOWN

The Point I don’t have to get my way to solve a conflict.

The Bible Meets Life What happens when you disagree with someone? It can break a relationship or maybe even lead to years of anger and bitterness. Disagreements can result in division even if neither person was wrong. When it comes to conflict, we all have to answer the question, “Is being right more important to me than this relationship?” Sometimes in conflict getting our way is not the primary objective. God’s will. Relationships. Bigger picture. We must consider each of these things as we address conflict.

The Passage Genesis 13:1-18

The Setting The time in Egypt had been profitable for Abram. His nephew, Lot, remained with him but between Abram and Lot, there was not enough land for all their livestock. This led to quarrels among their herdsmen. Abram gave Lot his choice of land. Lot chose the land to the east—the land that looked better—and Abram occupied the land of Canaan. The land Lot chose eventually returned to Abram and his descendants.

1 SESSION 3

WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY? Genesis 13:1-18 (HCSB) Then Abram went up from Egypt to the Negev—he, his wife, and all he had, and Lot with him. 2 Abram was very rich in livestock, silver, and gold. 3 He went by stages from the Negev to Bethel, to the place between Bethel and Ai where his tent had formerly been, 4 to the site where he had built the altar. And Abram called on the name of Yahweh there. 5 Now Lot, who was traveling with Abram, also had flocks, herds, and tents. 6 But the land was unable to support them as long as they stayed together, for they had so many possessions that they could not stay together, 7 and there was quarreling between the herdsmen of Abram’s livestock and the herdsmen of Lot’s livestock. At that time the Canaanites and the Perizzites were living in the land. 8 Then Abram said to Lot, “Please, let’s not have quarreling between you and me, or between your herdsmen and my herdsmen, since we are relatives. 9 Isn’t the whole land before you? Separate from me: if you go to the left, I will go to the right; if you go to the right, I will go to the left.” 10 Lot looked out and saw that the entire Jordan Valley as far as Zoar was well watered everywhere like the Lord’s garden and the land of Egypt. This was before the Lord destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah. 11 So Lot chose the entire Jordan Valley for himself. Then Lot journeyed eastward, and they separated from each other. 12 Abram lived in the land of Canaan, but Lot lived in the cities of the valley and set up his tent near Sodom. 13 Now the men of Sodom were evil, sinning greatly against the Lord. 14 After Lot had separated from him, the Lord said to Abram, “Look from the place where you are. Look north and south, east and west, 15 for I will give you and your offspring forever all the land that you see. 16 I will make your offspring like the dust of the earth, so that if anyone could count the dust of the earth, then your offspring could be counted. 17 Get up and walk around the land, through its length and width, for I will give it to you.” 18 So Abram moved his tent and went to live near the oaks of Mamre at Hebron, where he built an altar to the Lord. 1

Key Words CALLED ON THE NAME OF (v. 4) This expression was first used for worship in Genesis 4:26 and also in Genesis 13:4. It means to acknowledge God by worshiping Him. QUARRELING (v. 7) The Hebrew word used here described a public legal dispute or strife between two hostile parties. Although the word’s original meaning related to physical conflict, it most frequently described a verbal dispute.

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 2

ENGAGE

(15 MINUTES)

GET INTO THE STUDY ENGAGE: Begin the session with one or more of the Engage options on the next page. GUIDE: After you have created the experience with the Engage options, invite group members to turn their attention to the picture on page 2 of the Personal Study Guide (PSG). SAY: “Conflict is a part of life. Regardless of the issue, sometimes we want to “win” the argument rather than resolve it.” DISCUSS: Have students discuss the question at the bottom of page 2 of the PSG: “As a kid, what was something you’d claim as “Mine!” Encourage students to explain why they chose their answer. Allow time for each student to respond (a response now will encourage them to respond to other questions later in the study). GUIDE: Call attention to The Point on page 3 of the PSG. Explain that this is the key idea to keep in mind as the session is studied in this group session (it appears

THE POINT

at the top of each session page).

I don’t have to get my way to solve a conflict.

ASK: Ask for a volunteer to read aloud each of the paragraphs in The Bible Meets Life on page 3 of the PSG (assign a paragraph per volunteer if group size permits). READ: Genesis 13:1-18 (page 4 of the PSG). PRAY: Transition into the Bible study by pausing to thank God for His Word and to ask Him to help your group resolve conflict even when they don’t get their way.

3 SESSION 3

Engage Options YY Lead with Action

Open the session by asking students to choose between some of the following options. The goal is to get students to pick a side and be ready to argue their position. YYTheir

favorite team (school or professional)

YY Facebook, YY Favorite

Instagram, or Twitter

style of music

Once students have chosen, ask them to “debate” with someone who disagrees with them about why their choice is best. Once students have had a chance to argue for their choice say: “We can disagree on certain issues but none of these things are important enough that they are worth losing a

OPTION: Encourage students to come to the group wearing their favorite team colors. If some of the students play for a team, encourage them to wear their jersey if applicable.

relationship over. Let’s look at what the Bible teaches us about solving conflict even when we don’t get our way.”

YY Lead with Atmosphere

Decorate the meeting space with local or professional team colors, posters, or simply have team names on a whiteboard, chalkboard, or printed out on sheets of paper. The goal is to create an environment that highlights rival teams. If your students all attend the same school, use professional or collegiate level teams to decorate. When it’s time for your group to begin, say: “Some of you may be fans of the teams represented around the room today. Choosing a team often puts us at odds with the rival team and rival fans, but in the bigger picture, it’s never worth a relationship to root for a team. Let’s look at what the Bible tells us about dealing with solving conflict even when we don’t get our way.”

YY Lead with Media

Show a clip from the movie Finding Nemo in which the seagulls proclaim “Mine!”

OPTION: You can locate “Finding Nemo “Mine” fairly easily with a search of the web (always watch any video you use prior to meeting to ensure it is appropriate for your group and church).

as they chase Nemo’s father. Afterward say: “We look ridiculous when we fight for things that aren’t worth breaking a relationship over. Let’s look at what the Bible tells us about the importance of solving conflict whether or not we get our way.”

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 4

IMPART

(10 MINUTES)

TIP: When asking a discussion question determine if you need to lead with an answer of your own or let students answer first. Some questions need your guidance while others are best left for students to work through.

STUDY THE BIBLE

The Point: I don’t have to get my way to solve a conflict.

GENESIS 13:1-7 DISCUSS: Have students respond to the question at the top of page 5 of the PSG: “When was the last time you argued with someone over their opinion?” SCRIPTURE: 5 Now Lot, who was traveling with Abram, also had flocks, herds, and tents. 6 But the land was unable to support them as long as they stayed together, for they had so many possessions that they could not stay together, 7

and there was quarreling between the herdsmen of Abram’s livestock and the

herdsmen of Lot’s livestock. At that time the Canaanites and the Perizzites were living in the land. — Genesis 13:5-7 SAY: “The conflict between Abram and Lot was based on a “good problem”: they had too much stuff. Isn’t it interesting that we can find a way to argue about anything?”

TIP: Regardless of the amount of time you prepare for a lesson, try not to read too much from the book as you lead your group. If the lesson seems to be dragging spend more time on discussion.

GUIDE: Call attention to the three bullet points on page 5 of the PSG. YYWho gets the last piece of pizza? YYWhat do I do with all the clothes I don’t wear? YYWhich apps do I remove because my smartphone is out of space? SAY: “Even good things can lead to conflict with others.” DISCUSS: Lead group members to discuss the question on the bottom of page 5 of the PSG: “Have you ever had a conflict as a result of a “good problem”? SUMMARIZE: Recap that the Bible shows us that when we face conflict we need to be able to discern between important issues and ones that are not worth losing a relationship over. Direct students to page 6 of the PSG.

5 SESSION 3

Commentary GENESIS 13:1-7 As Abram returned, he was enjoying the promises God had given him. However, he was doing so outside of God’s plan for his life, so God brought severe plagues on Pharaoh’s household. Abram realized that his time in Egypt had been a mistake. He’d failed to follow God’s plan and, therefore, was sinning by enjoying the land at the expense of the wife he loved. In a new land, Abram came back to the faith that caused him to surrender to God’s will in the first place and he built an altar of worship. Through humility, God brought Abram back to where he should have remained in the first place. The altar represented a sacrifice. That was the intended purpose. The Israelites

TIP: As you prepare for the lesson, study a little bit of the background of the story. While the focus of the lesson is the conflict between Lot and Abram, it can be helpful to know what caused their argument.

would sacrifice an unblemished animal on the altar to God. It was the temporary, God-approved measure of dealing with sin until a Savior came. Abram knew he had done wrong in Egypt. He knew he needed forgiveness so he built an altar to recognize that God alone was His provider. At the altar of God, Abram worshipped God. After a time of worship, things tend to look differently. Abram’s outlook on things changed after he paused to reflect and worship God. The abundance of Abram and Lot’s possessions, however, caused a problem because there were too many of them and not enough land and resources to support all of them. They had too much livestock for the land their current land. This was a good problem (too much stuff), but a problem nonetheless. It’s interesting that we can find a way to argue about anything. Who gets the last piece of pizza? What do I do with all the clothes I don’t wear? Which apps do I remove because my smartphone is out of space? Even good things can lead us into conflict with others.

TIP: Make sure and let students know that conflict isn’t always bad. Many times conflict helps us develop and grow in maturity as well as in our faith.

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 6

IMPART

(10 MINUTES)

STUDY THE BIBLE

The Point: I don’t have to get my way to solve a conflict.

GENESIS 13:8-13 SCRIPTURE: Then Abram said to Lot, “Please, let’s not have quarreling between you and me, or between your herdsmen and my herdsmen, since we are relatives. 9

Isn’t the whole land before you? Separate from me: if you go to the left, I will go

to the right; if you go to the right, I will go to the left. — Genesis 13:8-13 GUIDE: Draw attention to the two key questions Abram asked while he faced the conflict with Lot on page 6 of the PSG. 1. What’s most important here? 2. What’s the greater answer to this conflict? DISCUSS: Lead students to discuss how each of these key questions might impact conflicts they face in life. TIP: If an activity is going well, spend more time on it. Never let it take over the entire lesson, but use it as a tool to better connect students with the material.

DISCUSS: Lead group members to discuss the question on page 6 of the PSG: “Have you ever had to give up the right to win an argument because it wasn’t worth it?” GUIDE: Tell students to skim the information in the paragraph at the bottom of page 6 of the PSG. SAY: “Abram rested on the promise that God gave him. Even though he allowed Lot to have the choice of the land, he knew God would provide for him.” DISCUSS: Ask students to discuss what it means to trust God when we stand down in conflicts that aren’t worth losing relationships over.

7 SESSION 3

Commentary GENESIS 13:8-13 As Lot and Abram approach the conflict of who gets to stay in the land, Abram leads with maturity. “Let’s not have quarreling between you and me.” Abram’s words are a picture of what faith should produce in the heart of a believer: humility. He asks two important questions: YY What’s most important here? YY What’s the greater answer to this conflict?

It’s only natural that we seek what is best for us or hold out for what we want. When conflict enters a relationship, most of us want to preserve the relationship, but we’re still going to look after our own interests. After all, “If I don’t look after my own interests, who will?”

TIP: To help guide discussion if you have a very talkative group: Bring an object to the session and ask that only the person holding it speak. This will help those who are less assertive be heard. It may seem weird at first, but students will get used to it after a while.

Compromise can often be an option, but sometimes the best option is simply to put aside our own interests and let the other person “win.” Those times are never easy, but we can receive the greater benefit of preserving and even strengthening the relationship when we consider the interest of others. Have you ever had to give up the right to win an argument for the sake of the relationship? Abraham came to the realization that whatever God brought his way would be best for him. After Abram allowed Lot to have the choice of land and Abram was

TIP: Remind students that God wants what is best for them but sometimes that doesn’t look like what they think it should.

alone with his decision, God honored him by reminding Abram of the promise he had already placed on his life. God would make him the “father of many nations”. Abram was given not only the leftover land, but he was promised north, south, east, and west. His offspring would be “like the dust of the earth”, more than could be counted. It is interesting that today the world’s largest religions lay claim to the land of Abram. His footprint on the earth is surely exponential, just as God promised it would be.

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 8

IMPART

(10 MINUTES)

STUDY THE BIBLE

The Point: I don’t have to get my way to solve a conflict.

GENESIS 13:17-18 SCRIPTURE:

Get up and walk around the land, through its length and width,

for I will give it to you.” 18 So Abram moved his tent and went to live near the oaks of Mamre at Hebron, where he built an altar to the Lord. —Genesis 13:17-18 GUIDE: Draw attention to the Action Point titled First World Pains on page 7 of the PSG. SAY: “A first world pain is something that seems like a big deal, but in the bigger picture is silly compared to actual problems people face in life.” ACTION POINT

TIP: If a student has a hard time paying attention call on him or her to do most of the reading during the session.

Have students write a few “first world pains” in the space provided on page 7 of the PSG. After everyone has written a few, invite them to share with the group.

DISCUSS: Lead students to discuss how we can take trivial issues and make them bigger than they really are. GUIDE: Read Genesis 13:17-18 and explain that Abram was willing to let Lot have his choice of land and in doing so truted God to provide his needs. ASK: Ask a volunteer to read each of the paragraphs on page 7 of the PSG. DISCUSS: Ask students to talk through the connection between standing down in conflict when it isn’t worth it and trusting God. How do these two concepts relate to each other?

9 SESSION 3

Commentary GENESIS 13:17-18 God told Abram to “walk around the land, through its length and width”. It appears God wanted Abram to enjoy this provision. He wanted him to know what he had. Interesting to me, apparently there is nothing wrong with having a large amount of land, or a mass of wealth. God appears to “show off” the land to Abram. It must be our attitude towards the things we have that can create a problem. Abram had humbly offered Lot the very best of the land. In doing so, he trusted God to care for him regardless of his current land situation. Abram, the man of faith, knew that if he was to be a man who trusted God, he would not be able

TIP: Let students know that choosing to forego a conflict for the right reasons doesn’t mean God will reward us with “choice land”. God doesn’t give us blessings and gifts as a result of our actions, but He gives them out of grace as each one is undesereved.

to rest on his own strength. He would have to rely on God. God honored that kind of humility and faith. The story of Abram and Lot teaches us a great deal about how believers are to handle conflict. Ultimately, if we, the bride of Christ, live in submission to our head and master, Jesus Christ, we will focus on His will and desires. We will look out not only for our own interests but also for the interests of others (Phil. 2:4). When we do, Christ is glorified, the church is strengthened, relationships are protected, strengthened, and restored, and in the end we all benefit. The way the world deals with conflict tells us a lot about the art of compromise, but it doesn’t teach us to win by giving ground. Culture might view such actions as “being a doormat,” but such acts of meekness are a far cry from allowing ourselves to be walked on or giving up our firm stance on biblical truths. Christians can show others the strength and benefits of meekness, as we willingly humble ourselves

TIP: Make sure students understand that there is a time to stand up for what is true. Standing down should never mean compromising our beliefs or faith.

to things that matter most. Healthy conflict results in the best decision, not the popular one, or the one that pleases me. Individuals and groups can “agree to disagree” over matters that are not clearly spelled out in Scripture (as explained in Rom. 14 and 1 Cor. 10:23-32), but we are never to compromise on biblical truth.

BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 10

IMPACT

(10 MINUTES)

APPLY IT READ: Ask for a volunteer to read aloud the three ways we can handle conflict in Apply It (page 8 of the PSG). GUIDE: Lead group members to consider which of the three suggested responses TIP: Let students know that the Live It Out activities are there to help them grow and put their faith into action. If they ever feel like they are just going through the motions to complete them, they may need to take a break from the activities.

to the Bible study most closely applies to them and their current circumstances.   ASK: “Which of these responses do you personally need to focus on most as you live this session out?” Allow time for responses.

WRAP UP READ: Call for a volunteer to read the last two paragraphs on page 8 at the end of Apply It. Our goal should always be to preserve a relationship rather than “win” an argument. We don’t have to get our way to solve a conflict. GUIDE: Challenge your group to complete the Live it Out options for the week. Have them turn to page 9 and 10 of the PSG and look over both options. Explain that each option will help them put into action what they have learned in the session. Let them know you will discuss them next time you meet.

11 SESSION 3

ONE CONVERSATION™

Use these discussion starters to help foster a spiritual conversation with your family.

THE BIBLE MEETS LIFE: What happens when you disagree with someone? It can break a relationship or maybe even lead to years of anger and bitterness. Disagreements can result in division even if neither person was wrong. Sometimes the best option is to put aside our own interests and let the other person “win.” As a result, we both receive the greater benefit of preserving and even strengthening the relationship .

GENESIS 13:1-18 Concept: Walk Away

PRESCHOOL GENESIS 13 LIFE POINT: Sometimes let others be first. • Why were Abram’s and Lot’s workers arguing? • How did Abram and Lot solve the problem the workers were having?

LIVE IT OUT: When sharing snacks or taking turns with toys, encourage your preschooler to let his friend have first choice. Remind your preschooler that it is important to take turns. He will not always get his own way. Remind your preschooler that Abram let Lot choose first.

KIDS GENESIS 13 LIFE POINT: Walk away from things that displease God, and trust His promises. • Why were Abram’s and Lot’s shepherds in conflict? • How did Abram and Lot resolve the conflict? • What did God tell Abram?

LIVE IT OUT: Provide your child with a strip of heavyweight paper. Encourage him to write on one side of the strip times when he finds himself in conflict with others. On the other side of the strip, write E4:32. Help him attach the strip around his wrist to remind him of Ephesians 4:32 when he finds himself in conflict with another person.

STUDENTS GENESIS 13:1-18 LIFE POINT: I don’t have to get my way to solve a conflict. • What is a conflict our family seems to have often? • How can we help each other work through conflict better as a family? Have a conversation around this verse about conflict: • “ To start a conflict is to release a flood; stop the dispute before it breaks out.” — Proverbs 17:14 (HCSB®)

LIVE IT OUT: Your student has been encouraged to do one or both Live It Out activities in the personal study guide. Ask if he has chosen to do either of the activities. If so, help by: If he plans to complete “Response Plan” and develop a plan to help him resolve conflict: • Talk about a conflict you have had recently and how you handled it. • Discuss any conflict you have had with him recently. If he plans to do “Armed For Conflict” and reflect on what the Bible says about conflict: • Ask if he would like you to read the verses and discuss them together at the end of the week. • Choose one of the passages to memorize together.