BLACK AND PINK NEWS
SUMMER 2019
A GROUP SHOW OF CURRENTLY INCARCERATED LGBTQ+ ARTISTS ON VIEW JUNE 2 — SEPTEMBER 8 CRAFT CONTEMPORARY
OPENING JUNE 2, 3–6PM ONTHEINSIDEART.COM 5814 WILSHIRE BOULEVARD LOS ANGELES CA 90036 CAFAM.ORG
Volume 10, Issue 3
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A message from Dominique... Summer 2019 I’ve been watching Pose repeatedly lately. It brings me a sense of peace. It reminds me of my past. Also, sadly it feels like our present. Pose is this beautiful new television show on FX depicting the experiences of Queer POC in the late 80’s in the ballroom scene in New York City. The mothers of the houses - all Trans women of color are complex, beautiful and maternal. I cry during every episode (Y’all know I’m an emotional Pisces). It reminds me of one of the women who raised me into adulthood - Miss TiTi. Miss TiTi was the first Queen I ever laid eyes on. Growing up in the hood of North Omaha (yes we have ghettos in Nebraska) folks were either gay or straight in my mind. A deeper understanding of Gender identity, sexual orientation and expression wouldn’t come into my life until my late 20’s. But Miss TiTi was my 101 course. Her full name was TATIANAALI-EL I know - GRAND as hell right?! But for our conversation we gon call her what we all called her Miss TiTi. She was all women and all power. I met her on the yard at Omaha Correctional Center in August of 2001. I was 6 month into my 8-16 year sentence. I remember she walked up to me and said : “You’re my daughter. You don’t know that yet but you are”. I remember laughing because
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1. I’d never had anyone refer to me with any sort of feminine connotation 2. I didn’t know this lady from a can of paint, Chile who did she think she was talking to? I hadn’t experienced togetherness in a long time. 330 days in county jail and 4 months in diagnostic had made me feel...different.
And yes, we fought each other lol like cats and dogs you hear me? I’ll never forget being on room restriction and catching one of my sisters talking to my crush in the law library lol BABY that was a scene!
So she proceed to cut her eyes at me and explain WHY I was her daughter. We had the same birth name (I would eventually legally changed my name to Dominique Morgan in 2004, she said that I was “fish” and that I needed to embrace that and last but NOT least she knew I was innocent and she would not let them (the system, the yard and these men) change that.
Miss TiTi had been in and out of Nebraska’s prison system her entire life. She used to say : “You’re my smart daughter. You’re not going to be like me”. I used to say but what’s wrong with being like you? I wanted to be strong. I wanted to be respected. She always seemed so sure...
I was innocent in all the ways that are scary in prison. I hadn’t seen much of the world. In my mind things were black and white. There were good people and bad people. Racism wasn’t real...ya know just holding court in the clouds lol. She showed me how to do my hair which had grown down my back by then. She taught me how to shave with those terrible prison razors. She taught me how to fight. How to READ. How to stand my ground. How to hustle. How to hold my head up high. She was everything I needed in that moment when my Daddy had just passed and my Mother was too filled with grief to be present. She also held me accountable to protecting my sisters on the yard. If I had food, we all had food. One of us fight? We ALL fighting. No one was alone anymore.
But we always worked it out. We always came back to the center.
Momma TiTi went home January of 2006. A few months later I was at the Lincoln Correctional Center in Lincoln, Ne walking past the TV in the day room. I’ll never forget I was cooking burritos for one of my friend’s birthday. The news was playing in the background and I heard TiTi’s dead name announced. They said she had stolen a car from a local grocery store and there was a high speed chase. Momma TiTi had crashed and she was killed instantly on impact. I was devastated. I remember grabbing my things and running to the shower to cry. I would cry in the shower so no one could see my tears... I came out the shower and the yard was buzzing with the news of TiTi’s passing. I didn’t know one of my neighbors on the gallery was her nephew. He was able to tell me more about the situation and we laughed and shared stories about her. I felt better remembering her with
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other people who loved her like I did. That day I decided to figure out what she saw in me. What she meant when she said I was going to be better than her. I don’t think I can ever be “better”. At the time I couldn’t process what we mean when we want more for those who come after us. I prayed to live up to her expectations and legacy. She was nurturing. She was innovative. She was passionate. I stand on her shoulders. What I’ve realized over the last year and a half or so is that WE stand on each other’s shoulders. That’s the beauty of being a family. A unit. A movement. I’m thankful for all of you. For giving me a reason to wake up. To keep working. To keep growing. Also in a family we are all different. We bring differing skills and ideas to the table. Diversity of thought is dope. I can’t promise you that you’ll read my letters and feel like I’ve given you the best abolitionist thought you’ve ever read.
Dominique Morgan
Summer 2019
Black & Pink News
I can however promise to bring in voices that can give you that important knowledge. I won’t attempt to be all things to everyone. I know many of you look for abolitionist education and thought. And I promise we will provide that for you in articles and guest writers. Also many people need other things to feed their soul. I want to make sure we offer that sustenance as well in the newsletter. In the next issue we will focus on self care. The winter issue we will dig into comprehensive sex eductaion. Many of you write letters about discoveries with your gender and sexuality and I want to offer great resources for you. Through all of this the underlying goal is liberation. My only goal in these letters are to create a space where you don’t feel alone. Your story isn’t singular. A few things before I go… We will be launching a contest in the next issue to to give our lovely newsletter a name
for
our
15th
anniversary.
I get all your letters when you address them to me. I get busy and can’t write back as quickly as I like ( I do have a few pen pals I write on the regular) but I always get them. I want you to know I appreciate your kind words and I love you very much. I want to shout out: Lloyd Green in Whiteville, TN My guy Milhouse, David Nabity in the Fed system My good sis TJ King Deshawn McCoy in Tennessee Colony, TX Stay safe, love on each other and make sure that you hold on to your peace. In solidarity,
Dominique Morgan Executive Director Black and Pink, Inc. Omaha, Nebraska
Miss TiTi
Volume 10, Issue 3
In This Issue News you can use Welcoming Advocacy Team Members pages 7-8 What Were the Stonewall Riots? pages 9-10
Profiles of Stonewall Activists Storme DeLarverie pages 11- 12
Marsha P. Johnson
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blackandpink.org Black & Pink Hotline The hotline phone number is (531) 600-9089. The hotline will be available Sundays, 1-5 p.m. (Eastern Standard Time) for certain. You can call at other times, as well, and we will do our best to answer your calls as often as possible. We are sorry that we can only accept prepaid calls at this time. The purposes of the hotline are: Supportive listening: Being in prison is lonely, as we all know. The hotline is here for supportive listening so you can just talk to someone about what is going on in your life. Organizing: If there are things going on at your prison—lockdowns, guard harassment, resistance, or anything else that should be shared with the public—we can help spread the word.
work toward the abolition of the prison-industrial complex (PIC) is rooted in the experiences of currently and formerly incarcerated people. We are outraged by the specific violence of the PIC towards LGBTQ people, and we respond through advocacy, education, direct service, and organizing. Black & Pink is proudly a family of people of all races and ethnicities. About Black & Pink News Since 2007, Black & Pink free world volunteers have pulled together a monthly newspaper, composed primarily of material written by our family’s incarcerated members. In response to letters we receive, we send the newspaper to more prisoners every month! Black & Pink News currently reaches more than 9,400 prisoners!
pages 13-14
Sylvia Rivera pages 15-17 Miss Major Griffin-Gracey pages 18-20
Black & Pink family Our PRIDE pages 21-23 On The Inside Art Exhibit pages 24 - 26
Letters pages 27-31 Poetry pages 33-37
Give us a call! (531) 600-9089 Sundays, 1-5 p.m. EST
We look forward to hearing from you! This is our first attempt at this so please be patient with us as we work it all out. We will not be able to answer every call, but we will do our best. We apologize to anyone who has been trying to get through to the hotline with no success. We are still working out the system. Thank you for being understanding. Restrictions: The hotline is not a number to call about getting on the penpal list or to get the newspaper. The hotline is not a number to call for sexual or erotic chatting. The hotline is not a number for getting help with your current court case; we are not legal experts. Statement of Purpose Black & Pink is an open family of LGBTQ prisoners and “free world” allies who support each other. Our
Disclaimer The ideas and opinions expressed in Black & Pink News are solely those of the authors and artists and do not necessarily reflect the views of Black & Pink. Black & Pink makes no representations as to the accuracy of any statements made in Black & Pink News, including but not limited to legal and medical information. Authors and artists bear sole responsibility for their work. Everything published in Black & Pink News is also on the internet—it can be seen by anyone with a computer. By sending art or written work to “Newspaper Submissions,” you are agreeing to have it published in Black & Pink News and on the internet. In order to respect our members’ privacy, we publish only first names and state locations. We may edit submissions to fit our anti-oppression values and/or based on our own editing guidelines.
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Black & Pink News
August 2019
Summer 2019
Volume 10, Issue 3
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The Black and Pink Policy and Advocacy Team Happy Pride! I want to take a moment and introduce Black & Pink’s new policy and advocacy team. Some of you may know us from our time on the Board and from work in the community. For those who don’t, a warm hello to you. I am David Booth, the Director of Policy and Advocacy. As Director, I am responsible for setting and implementing the policy and advocacy strategy for Black & Pink, which includes collaborating with the Chapters to develop and strengthen their strategies. Lastly, I have oversight over the National LGBTQ Criminal Justice Working Group and support Mike in his role with the group. Michael Cox is joining the team as the Deputy Director. In this role, Michael is responsible for coordinating the Working Group and advocating for changes in federal policy. Life has blessed me with the experiences of living behind prison walls, navigating genderqueerness, and moving through trauma. I’ve been free from my concrete closet since January 2007. It’s been a long and hard journey filled with many lessons, during which I realized I don’t need to fit any expectation of how I’m to show up. My authentic self and its many complexities are enough. We are all enough as we are, and it’s important to mirror this belief in our work. These lessons form a curriculum painstakingly
David Booth, Director of Policy and Advocacy for Black and Pink
learned from my lived experiences with the PIC, trauma, working within the policy world for over five years, and the privilege of learning to lovingly hold my complicated self that informs the liberation we will achieve with Black & Pink. Michael, free since 2012, believes in the power of community.
He is passionate about centering the needs and voices of directly impacted people. He is a member of Black & Pink’s Boston chapter, the Working Group, and Massachusetts Against Solitary Confinement. Most recently, he was appointed to serve on the Special Commission on the Health and Safety of LGBTQIA Prisoners.
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After serving six years in prison as a gay cis-man, he earned his B.A. in Political Science from Clark University. Currently, he focuses on structural change through policy and advocacy work in both Massachusetts and Washington, D.C. Our Chapters and Members are the lifeblood of Black & Pink, and your voices are vital to developing and implementing our collective strategy. We offer each of you a promise to consistently and collaboratively show up. In our roles, we will work to provide our Members with the tools and resources for effective organizing and advocacy against systems of violence and oppression. We’ll update our inside members periodically with the new changes, which will include strategies to build their advocacy and support their leadership towards the abolition movement. Keep an eye out for updates! Thank you for your dedicated efforts to liberate us all from the PIC. We are inspired by your time and commitment towards a world without prisons. Together, we can make this world a community where we can love and live full and safe lives free from oppression. In solidarity, David Booth, Director of Policy & Advocacy Michael Cox, Deputy Director of Policy and Advocacy
Michael Cox, Deputy Director of Policy and Advocacy for Black and Pink
Volume 10, Issue 3
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What [happened at] Stonewall? The story of the historic demonstrations
By JOSH JACKMAN AND LYDIA SMITH www.pinknews.co.uk June 28, 2018 Stonewall was a crucial, era-defining moment in the struggle for equality. In the early hours of June 28 1969, a gay bar in the West Village of Manhattan became the epicentre of an event that changed the course of LGBT history. The days which followed the uprising against police who frequently targeted The Stonewall Inn along with other gay bars were momentous. Led by prominent activists Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera, who were trans women of colour, the demonstration psparked an
The Stonewall Inn (Flickr Creative Commons, yosoynuts)
and the reason why we celebrate Pride Month in June. Rivera and Johnson also later cofounded the organization STAR, or Street Transvestite Action Revolutionaries, a group dedicated to helping homeless young drag queens and trans women of colour. Johnson was known for her fierce activism and advocacy of homeless queer people and sex workers, as well as saying the ‘P.’ in her name stood for “pay it no mind” – now the title of a documentary about her life. Johnson was one of the first to resist police intimidation at the bar, and Rivera is rumoured to have thrown the first bottle. Then, when lesbian activist Stormé DeLarverie was attacked by police for saying her handcuffs were too tight, the riot broke out.
How did Stonewall start? On June 28 1969, the police stopped by The Stonewall Inn on the grounds of checking for alcohol law violations and other transgressions – something they did frequently. What actually occurred, as was often the case, was police intimidation and demands for payoffs – dubbed “gayola” – in return for not arresting or publicising the names of customers. It was police procedure at the time to take anyone dressed as a woman to the bathroom, before arresting them if they were revealed to have been assigned male at birth. But that night, a dramatic turn of events changed the course of the LGBT movement as
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gay customers, drag queens and transgender patrons resisted. Johnson, a drag queen and gay liberation activist who was celebrating her 25th birthday at the Stonewall Inn that night, was reportedly one of the first to stand up to the intimidation and galvanise support. Johnson’s friend and ally, Rivera, who was a fellow activist and drag queen, also took action by throwing a bottle at the police. Both women, instrumental in the LGBT rights movement, are credited with playing major roles in the backlash against police brutality at the Stonewall Inn. Other Stonewall customers threw bottles, coins and other items at the officers, as tensions which had built for a long time finally boiled over as those inside the bar were dragged outside by police. The crowd erupted after a lesbian called Stormé DeLarverie was hit over the head by police for complaining that her handcuffs were too tight and the rioting spread as sympathisers joined in the resistance. Shouts of “gay power” and “we shall overcome” could be heard down the street as support spread. According to US gay Craig Rodwell, quoted in an article by author Lionel Wright, “A number of incidents were happening simultaneously. There was no one thing that happened or one person, there was just… a flash of group, of mass anger.” As news of the fracas spread across the city, the group of angry demonstrators swelled until the police were forced to take refuge in the empty bar. “I had been in combat situations,” Detective Inspector Pine is
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quoted by Wright as saying. “But there was never any time that I felt more scared than then.” The crowd, which was made up of all shades of the LGBT community, flocked to Christopher Street to take part in this revolutionary act of defiance. Although the police, backed up the Tactical Patrol Force, tried several times to break up the crowd, they were outwitted by rioters who would simply disperse, regroup and attack from a different direction. The violence in Greenwich continued for more than three nights, with members of the LGBT community using the riots as a much-needed opportunity to distribute leaflets and information, to educate others amid the chaos.
What happened after the Stonewall riots? In short, the organised fight for LGBT equality was born. The Gay Liberation Front was formed in the wake of the riots to protest against the social oppression of the LGBT community. Michael Adams, the Executive Director of Services and Advocacy for GLBT Elders, has said that “in the early days of the modern LGBT movement, the Gay Liberation Front was one of the most visible and vocal organisations promoting equalityfor the LGBT community.” Similar movements were quickly established in Canada, France, Britain, Germany, Belgium, Holland, Australia, and New Zealand.
Why were the Stonewall riots such a turning point? Many historians and journalists
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have pointed out that during the 1960s the whole social climate was changing. The Vietnam War had radicalised the American youth. As young men went off to war many became involved in homosexual relationships, while back in the States there was, according to Wright, an “opening-up of US society” that could not be quashed. The black civil rights movement was gaining ground, French students had gone on strike the year before, the Communist Party had campaigned for gay rights and returning servicepeople had stayed in port cities like Manhattan. Craig Rodwell is quoted as saying: “There was a very volatile active political feeling, especially among young people … when the night of the Stonewall Riots came along, just everything came together at that one moment… There was no one thing special about it. “It was just everything coming together, one of those moments in history that if you were there, you knew, this is it, this is what we’ve been waiting for.” Nearly half a century on from the Stonewall Riots, the global LGBT community still faces significant problems. In many South Asian and Middle Eastern countries homosexuality is still illegal and still, as far as the law goes, punishable by death. In many European countries and even in the UK – in Northern Ireland – the campaign for equal marriage continues. Anti-gay bullying is still prevalent in schools and workplaces, and anti-LGBT sentiment is still being combatted across the world. But for many, that fight has its roots in those dramatic riots in Greenwich all those years ago.
Volume 10, Issue 3
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Drag Herstory: A Drag King’s Journey From Cabaret Legend to Iconic Activist By Elyssa Goodman
www.them.us March 29, 2018
At Stonewall and beyond, Stormé DeLarverie walked in lockstep with queer history. RuPaul’s Drag Race has made drag more popular than ever — but as much as we love the queens on screen, it’s important to know the drag legends who paved their way, making the art form what it is today. “Drag Herstory” will focus on iconic drag performers throughout history, providing essential knowledge about the world beyond Drag Race*.* There are several well-known photographs of Stormé DeLarverie (pronounced, as she puts it in the documentary short Stormé: The Lady of the Jewel Box, “Storm De-Lah-vee-yay”), but perhaps the most famous was shot by none other than legendary portraitist Diane Arbus. In the image, DeLarverie sits elegantly on a park bench in a slimcut suit, one leg crossed over the other, with shiny black ankle boots on her feet and a hand bearing both a glimmering pinky ring and the very end of a cigarette. The image, titled Miss Stormé de Larverie, the Lady Who Appears to be a Gentleman, N.Y.C., was taken in 1961. At the time, DeLarverie was the emcee, musical director, and occasional stage manager of the Jewel Box Revue, a touring drag cabaret known for its slogan “25 Men and One Girl”;
they performed three or four shows a day at famous nightclubs and venues in New York City and across the country. Jewel Box audiences, which were made up of queer and straight patrons as well as families who loved the show, knew who the 25 men were. The “female impersonators,” as they were called back then, graced the stage in lush gowns and lashes. But audiences often spent much of the show trying to figure out who the “one girl” was — until the very end, when their emcee, DeLarverie (who would begin performances in a perfectly tailored suit and occasionally a mustache), revealed her true
identity during a number called “A Surprise With a Song.” DeLarverie performed as a drag king, or “male impersonator,” as it was known in the past, with the Jewel Box Revue from 1955 to 1969. Prior to that, she had been a singer with big bands — as swing and jazz orchestras were known — since 1939. DeLarverie was born in New Orleans in 1920. Having a white father and a black mother, she was never issued a birth certificate because interracial marriage was against the law, but she celebrated her birthday on December 24. While growing up, she was so often bullied, attacked, and beaten by peers for being biracial — one incident left her with
Storme Delarverie (Flickr Creative Commons, Andre)
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a leg brace, another resulted in a scar from being left hanging on a fence — that her father ultimately sent her away to private school for her own safety. She also spent some time as a teenager in Ringling Bros. Circus, riding jumping horses sidesaddle. At around 18, she realized she was gay and decided to move to Chicago: She said she feared she’d be murdered if she stayed in the South. In the 1940s, DeLarverie sang as “Stormy Dale,” dressed as a woman. But in 1946, she was in Miami visiting Danny Brown and Doc Brenner of the venue Danny’s Jewel Box, from which the Jewel Box Revue would later spring, and they needed some help with the show. People said she couldn’t do drag for the show, she mentioned in an interview, and that it would ruin her reputation, she said in another one. But she didn’t care. She said she had planned to stay for six months but that those six months turned into 14 years. “It was very easy. All I had to do was just be me and let people use their imaginations,” she said in Stormé: The Lady of the Jewel Box. “It never changed me. I was still a woman.” “Men’s jackets were loose, but the pants were skintight. And if I ever took my jacket off onstage, the dirt was out,” she said in the aforementioned documentary. “But you know the strange thing is, I never moved any different than I had when I was wearing women’s clothes. [The audience] only saw what they wanted to see and they believed what they wanted to believe.” DeLarverie became so celebrated that she began circulating in highly respected crowds, among the likes of Dinah
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Washington and Billie Holiday. Dressing in traditionally masculine attire, she may have inspired other lesbians of the era in New York to do the same. Then, in summer 1969, the historic Stonewall uprising happened. And DeLarverie was there. There’s still some debate about whether she was the “cross-dressing lesbian” who threw the first punch that initiated the event (ostensibly at a cop who told her to “Move along, faggot,” because he apparently thought she was a man). But her presence there turned her into an icon in LGBTQ+ history after the riots — which she felt were not so much riots but an act of disobedience and rebellion, she would say later. Nonetheless, these events gave greater momentum to the gay rights movement in the U.S., and DeLarverie is today revered for her monumental contributions to the gay rights movement. Shortly after Stonewall, DeLarverie’s girlfriend of 25 years, a dancer named Diana, passed away, and DeLarverie left entertaining almost entirely. Instead, she became a bodyguard for wealthy families during the day and a bouncer (though she didn’t like the term and much preferred “babysitter of my people, all the boys and girls”) at several lesbian bars in the West Village at night. DeLarverie was also known at the time for roaming the West Village vigilante-style — she had no tolerance for what she called “ugly,” meaning rudeness, bullying, or behavior that was otherwise intolerant of her “baby girls” at the bars she was protecting. DeLarverie Cubbyhole’s at 438
started original Hudson
at the location, Street,
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and then became the security guard when it changed hands and became Henrietta Hudson, in 1990. She was on staff there until 2005, when she was 85. DeLarverie also became a board member of the Stonewall Veterans’ Association and was an annual fixture at New York’s annual Gay Pride Parade. “She literally walked the streets of downtown Manhattan like a gay superhero,” longtime friend Lisa Cannistraci told The New York Times upon DeLarverie’s death, in 2014. “She was not to be messed with by any stretch of the imagination.” DeLarverie would continue to sing at charity events and fundraisers around New York, too, specifically for victims of violence and domestic abuse. Having experienced a difficult upbringing herself, DeLarverie always sought to provide protection for others, whether it was at the Jewel Box or Henrietta Hudson. As she said in a 2001 documentary short called “A Stormé Life,” “I’m a human being that survived. I helped other people survive.”
Artwork by Crista Facciolla courtesy of amplifer.org
Volume 10, Issue 3
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Meet Marsha P. Johnson, an iconic LGBTQ rights leader who’s sure to inspire you By Angelica Florio www.hellogiggles.com June 11, 2018 Because June is LGBTQ Pride Month, the upcoming weeks will include parades and celebrations all around the world. None of the month’s excitement would be happening without the 1969 Stonewall Riots, though, and those events couldn’t have happened without Marsha P. Johnson, the transgender woman who helped lead New York’s gay liberation movement. While most people now recognize Johnson for her role in the Stonewall police raid, which happened in the early morning hours of June 28th 1969, the activist had already made a name for herself in New York City’s Greenwich Village neighborhood before the uprising took place. After the Stonewall Riots, too, Johnson continued her work as an activist, notably working as an advocate for AIDS patients’ care before she died in 1992. Johnson was born in 1945 in Elizabeth, New Jersey. According to The New York Times, she was the fifth of seven children in her working-class family. After graduating from Thomas A. Edison High School in 1963, Johnson moved to New York City. From there, she began going by a new persona called Black Marsha. The term “transgender” wasn’t used during Johnson’s lifetime, but the activist
Marsha P Johson (Flickr Creative Commons, Randy aka Randolfe Wicker)
usually used female pronouns and sometimes called herself either gay, a transvestite, or a queen. Johnson’s Life in New York After she’d moved to New York City, Johnson worked as a prostitute and a drag performer.
Due to the heavy, violent police presence in gay communities during the 1960s, Johnson faced systemic discrimination and was arrested often. The New York Times reports that “she stopped counting after the 100th [arrest].” According to The Daily Beast, Johnson maintained a cheerful disposition and was seen
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as a fixture of the West Village. After Johnson became as Marsha P., the drag would tell people that stood for “Pay it no
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known queen the P mind!”
The Stonewall Uprising Johnson and her friend and political partner, Sylvia Rivera, are credited with igniting the events at Stonewall on June 28th, 1969. The Stonewall Inn on Christopher Street had served as a safe space and a hub for LGBTQ folks to gather. When the police raided the bar to arrest 13 people on dubious charges, many of the bar’s attendees decided to fight back. Based on many eyewitness accounts, Johnson and Rivera were among the first people to fight back against the police officers’ outright discrimination against gay people. As her Penn State biography states, most of Stonewall’s patrons were members of marginalized groups, even within the LGBQ community, including people of color, trans people, butch lesbians, drag queens, and other nonmainstream queer identities. The Stonewall uprising — which many people call a “riot” or “rebellion” — lasted six days and attracted hundreds of people to Christopher Street to demand LGBTQ rights.
TransvestiteAction Revolutionaries, or STAR, in 1970. That group championed the rights of young transgender people, and according the The New York Times, STAR used a tenement to house, clothe, and feed trans youth. Johnson also continued performing as a drag queen during the early 1970s. In 1972, her group the Hot Peaches began performing, and in 1975, Andy Warhol photographed Johnson for a collection called “Ladies and Gentlemen.” Although Johnson was thriving while working as an activist and touring the world with the Hot Peaches during the ’70s, she began struggling with mental breakdowns, and she frequently checked in and out of psychiatric institutions. AIDS Activism Like with so many members of the LGBTQ community, the AIDS crisis of the 1980s greatly affected Johnson. She cared for her activist friend Randy Wicker’s
boyfriend, David Combs, who died of AIDS in 1990. That year, Johnson contracted H.I.V., which she didn’t reveal until 1992. Johnson’s Tragic Death On July 6th, 1992, Johnson’s body was found in the Hudson River. At the time, the authorities called the death a suicide, but The New York Times states that many of Johnson’s friends questioned that designation. Later that year, Johnson’s cause of death was reclassified as “drowning from undetermined causes,” and then in 2012 the authorities re-opened the case to look again at Johnson’s cause of death; it remains open. In many ways, Johnson opened the door for so many people to identify themselves as proudly LGBTQ, and more specifically as transgender. Although her life came to a tragic and mysterious end when she was just 47 years old, Johnson’s legacy as an activist and performer should always be remembered.
Street Transvestite Action Revolutionaries (STAR) Following the events at Stonewall, many activists started groups advocating for gay rights, including the Gay Liberation Front, Human Rights Campaign, GLAAD, and more. As an offshoot of the Gay Liberation Front, Johnson and Rivera co-founded Street
Marsha P Johnson and Sylvia Rivera (Wikimedia Commons)
Volume 10, Issue 3
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How Sylvia Rivera Created the Blueprint for Transgender Organizing
By Raquel Willis
www.out.com May 21, 2019
The trans activist’s most enduring legacy lies in the institutions she built, inspired, and forced to change. Two years before her death, Stonewall veteran Sylvia Rivera served as muse for a photography series captured by Valerie Shaff. The black-and-white images feature the outspoken activist dolled up with razor-thin eyebrows, a bold lip, and wind-strewn hair on a makeshift encampment near the Hudson River. A nearly 50-year-old
Marsha P Johnson and Sylvia Rivera (Flickr Creative Commons, Jerimarie Liesegang)
Rivera was living there in protest of the mostly gay- and lesbian-focused organizations and community groups at the time — particularly, The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Community Center (then known as the Lesbian and Gay Community Services Center Inc.), which was mere city blocks away. Rivera contended that the mainstream LGBTQ+ organizations were ignoring the needs of local homeless youth and transgender people. For her, the LGBTQ+ nonprofit industrial complex had grown into something far different from the initiatives she’d spearheaded throughout her lifetime.
“Sylvia was really for the democratization of our movement. She was unwilling to have an agenda be set behind closed doors by the most elite people in the community,” says Dean Spade, a trans activist and associate professor at Seattle University School of Law. “We see this even now: There are always battles over how homeless people and people with psychiatric disabilities are treated at LGBTQ+ centers and events. The battles over those exclusions are an example of carrying on Sylvia’s work in a deep way.” When Rivera left the world due to complications from liver cancer
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in 2002, her work served as a bridge: on one side, the advocacy world dominated by gay men and lesbians who had historically excluded trans people; and on the other, an increasingly more vocal trans community and an uprising of trans-led organizations. For this next generation of activists, Rivera’s groundbreaking creation of Street Transvestite Action Revolutionaries (STAR) and the accompanying STAR House represented one of the first major initiatives centering trans and gender nonconforming people in our community. According to Trap Door: Trans Cultural Production and the Politics of Visibility edited by Tourmaline, Eric A. Stanley, and Johanna Burton, “Rivera and [Marsha P.] Johnson have especially been invoked by contemporary advocates working to imagine a world beyond today’s neoliberal and homonormative social justice landscape.” As the volume notes, there were other organizations at the time with varying degrees of radicalism in their politics — the Queens Liberation Front, the Transvestite Legal Committee, and the Transexual Action Organization among them. Nonetheless, STAR has had the most enduring legacy. This is particularly notable, considering STAR’s first iteration disbanded after the 1973 Christopher Street Liberation Day. During the march, which is a precursor to today’s Pride celebrations, Rivera and her cohorts were heckled by onlookers and fellow participants, mainly gay men and lesbians who were unsupportive of STAR’s organizing efforts. At the time, STAR (and the trans community in general) was deemed adjacent to the priorities of
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Gay Liberation, and organizers worried their inclusion would send the wrong message to the press and general public. In fact, it wasn’t just STAR that disbanded. “Sylvia left the movement after the first few years because she had been refused the right to speak after one of the Pride marches,” says Randy Wicker, a longtime activist and late-in-life friend of Rivera’s. “She left for 20 years.” But in 1992, when she learned of the mysterious death of her friend and fellow organizer, Marsha P. Johnson, Rivera was lured back into organizing work. Some eight years later, a 25-year-old transgender woman named Amanda Milan was killed by two men in the streets of New York. Milan’s brutal murder, which occurred just before that year’s Pride Parade, crystallized Rivera’s enduring frustrations with the queer community: When Matthew Shepard was killed, his death prompted widespread outrage, organization, press outreach, television spots, and even legislative attention. Rivera, reignited, refused to let Milan pass without demanding the same outrage. Following Rivera’s lead, the trans community mobilized around Milan’s murder, prompting an astounding 300 people to attend her funeral. Rivera, still unafraid to call out the transmisogynistic respectability politics of the cis gay elite, was disappointed that the Human Rights Campaign, now the largest LGBTQ+ advocacy group in the United States, hadn’t taken up the often overlooked murders of transgender people as a worthy cause. “Trans people were very angry at the Human Rights Campaign.
Summer 2019
You don’t realize how marginalized trans people were. HRC considered them a fringe group,” Wicker remembers. “I don’t think they had any understanding of gender identity and issues of freedom and gender expression.” Tired of waiting for their reform, Rivera instead remade STAR. Milan’s death became a symbol: tears shed transformed into a rallying cry. Despite continued silencing and erasure from the larger landscape of LGBTQ+ nonprofits, Rivera fought fiercely in the last two years of her life. She continued to publicly excoriate the proposed Sexual Orientation Non-Discrimination Act (SONDA), which had been periodically introduced since the 1970s and failed to provide protections for trans people. Wicker recalls Rivera meeting with the Empire State Pride Agenda on her deathbed, pleading that trans people not be left out of the legislation. Ultimately, they were — and gender identity wouldn’t be included in the law until New York Governor David Paterson issued an executive order seven years later. Within a year of Rivera’s death in February 2002, the beginnings of a national network of trans-led organizations began to emerge. Transgender Law Center was founded in San Francisco in July of that year by recent law school graduates Dylan Vade and Chris Daly. A month later, Spade exalted the legacy of Rivera in the formation of the Sylvia Rivera Law Project, a multiracial legal aid organization centering trans, gender nonconforming, and intersex people who are low-income. While he was inspired in part by his own discriminatory run-ins with law
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enforcement and the legal system as a trans man, he also set out to enshrine the radical, intersectional approach to organizing and activism that Rivera utilized throughout her life. “We designed our organization as a collective, using a horizontal structure. We don’t pay lawyers more than we pay people who don’t have a degree. We’re focused on trying to actually build the political capacity of our movements and make change from [the most marginalized],” Spade says. “I think all of that work is in the vein of what Sylvia was asking for because she came from movements in the ‘60s and ‘70s that were very much volunteer-based, grassroots, and trying to build mass mobilizations.” In the next decade, more trans organizations and initiatives would find their footing,
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including the National Center for Transgender Equality. And now, more than 15 years after Rivera’s death, the landscape of trans-led organizations across the U.S. looks drastically different. In fact, Borealis Philanthropy’s Fund for Trans Generations (FTG), which supports trans-led initiatives, boasted supporting 93 groups and organizations in 2018. That same year, The Trans Justice Funding Project aided nearly twice as many specifically grassroots efforts. Though often forgotten or completely erased, Rivera’s impact far exceeds the lore and legend surrounding her involvement in the Stonewall Riots. Her decades-long commitment to building infrastructure for trans and gender nonconforming people to thrive has had a lasting impact
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on the world of organizing, on an almost molecular level. In any instance of trans social justice work, a fair question of measure would be, “What would Sylvia do?” “Sylvia was a very disruptive person who entered movement spaces and demanded to be heard and wasn’t afraid to break the rules, make people uncomfortable, and push for things that were unhearable inside some of the white-led gay and lesbian politics that were more dominant,” Spade says. “The tradition of those kind of tactics are something we really hold on to by lifting her up and honoring her in all of her depth.” Eight months before her death, Rivera was invited to speak at the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Community Center, the institution that had once ignored her pleas for support on behalf of the trans community. In a signature moment of righteous defiance, as chronicled by Lawrence La Fountain-Stokes in the Center for Puerto Rican Studies’ 2007 CENTRO Journal, she said, “The trans community has allowed the gay and lesbian community to speak for us. Times are changing. Our armies are rising and we are getting stronger. And when we come a-knocking — that includes from here to Albany to Washington — they’re going to know that you don’t fuck with the transgender community.” Correction: The final quote from Sylvia Rivera at the LGBT Community Center omitted a necessary attribution to Lawrence La Fountain-Stokes and CENTRO Journal for the original transcription and documentation.
Sylvia River (Flickr Creative Commons, Jerimarie Liesegang)
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Summer 2019
TransVisionaries: How Miss Major Helped Spark the Modern Trans Movement By Raquel Willis
www.them.us March 8, 2018
In TransVisionaries, trans activist Raquel Willis talks with trans elders who helped kick off and shape the trans rights movement as we know it today. As we celebrate International Women’s Day, we must elevate the brilliant and powerful transgender women of color who have paved the way for today’s social justice movements. Miss Major GriffinGracy has spent more than 40 years advocating for the marginalized, whether in prisons or on the streets. Born and raised on the South Side of Chicago, the trans activist came to know herself in the 1950s and 60s, when police raids of queer bars were rampant and the thought of LGBTQ+ people speaking out against oppression was novel. She, alongside other vanguard activists like Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera, emerged from the perilous 1969 Stonewall Riots with a commitment to support her sisters and other trans family. Though Miss Major’s lifelong leadership is now widely acclaimed, the road hasn’t always been smooth. She spent several stints in prison during the 1970s, and credits her radical political stance on issues like abolition and Black liberation to those experiences. Despite her own run-ins
Miss Major with activist Tourmaline on the cover of Out magazine
with white supremacist, cisheteronormative systems like the prison-industrial complex, she has always played a role in building up and motivating the trans community. In MAJOR!, a feature-length documentary that chronicles her life, many of her close friends and confidants share the positive
influence she has had on their lives and the various local communities she has lived in. In 2005, Miss Major joined San Francisco-based Trans Gender Variant and Intersex Justice Project (TGIJP) as a staff organizer, and later as executive director, to
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lead their efforts advocating for incarcerated transgender women. She officially retired in 2015, but her fire continues to burn. She is currently working on building House of GG’s, a safe haven and retreat house for the transgender community. We caught up with Miss Major to discuss her long fight for liberation, self-care, and her thoughts on the current political climate and what it means for trans activism. What does it mean for you to be 40 years into your activism and to be an elder now after getting involved in the movement at such a young age? When you’re doing this out of care and concern, you really don’t think about it as activism or a movement. You think of it as — for me — protecting my girls. Getting to this age is interesting, because things are better than they were when I was growing up. There’s still the stigma of being a trans person, but the world is changing and we are more prominent than we’ve ever been, in a semi-positive light. They’re still killing us, they’re still throwing us underneath the jails, but there are people that are not a part of our community who are bitching about the injustices that they are doing to us. That’s a major step. You’re right; so much is different now. There are so many young folks that are owning their identities at single-digit ages. What were the dynamics of your family and how did you understand yourself as a kid? At that point it was, as it is now, a matter of survival. It’s interesting to think about when I was younger
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— the constraints and the way I had to negotiate through in order to maintain breathing every day. My family would say, “Oh, that boy is acting way too femme, chile” or “You need to beat the ‘shim’ out of him.” They tried, but you know us trans people are some tough sons of bitches. We don’t take that shit, especially the Black girls. We understand what we’ve had to go through as a culture and as a people. It becomes a matter of standing up for who we know we are. It’s not that we believe we’re this or that. We know that’s who we are. When the dust settles, I want my trans girls and guys to stand up and say, ‘I’m still fucking here!’ You grew up on the South Side of Chicago. Do you have any family still there that you see? Well, everyone else is dead. My father’s family was small and my mother’s family was large. All of my aunts are gone. I may have some cousins here and there. Of course, they’re not going to keep up with me. As I was living my life, I didn’t have time to hold connections to people who would rather I die than breathe and be successful. You’ve lived in a lot of places, but you most recently moved from San Francisco to Little Rock for your current project. What is it and how did you come up with the name, House of GG? The technical name is GriffinGracy Historical Retreat and Educational Center, but that’s a lot for people to remember. When I came up, there were houses that developed in New York, like like the House of Crystal Labeija
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and the House of Xtravaganza. They started in order to help the younger girls who were on the street. They helped them learn the things they needed to do to survive, like how to negotiate with the cops and what to do if they got busted. I thought in honor of them and all they’ve done and tried to do, I would keep the thought and feeling of them alive with the House of GG. I want it to be a retreat where I can bring the girls here and help to create a sense of family for our community. We saw each other about a month and a half ago at the Creating Change conference, when you received the Susan Hyde Award for Longevity in the Movement. I know that was complicated because you talked about the weirdness of having white, cis gay people honoring you in that way after all of these years. Yeah, these white, over-privileged, entitled, stick-up-their-ass motherfuckers who hate us, nudge each other when they see us, talk about us as we walk by no matter what city we live in. It’s not that all of them are bad. There’s about three out of the thousand that have some sense and respect people for who they are. I had a lot of personal issues over this. I said in my speech, ‘It took 40 years for me to get up here. You motherfuckers are late.’ They want to rant and rave and act like, “Oh this is the thing to do!” Miss Major is not your token. You need a token? Well, go to the subway and buy one and get on a fucking bus. In accepting the award, I wanted to make sure that I stood up for my community and who I am [by letting] them know that
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they have been doing this shit to me since I was a kid and it hasn’t stopped. The only reason they don’t do it to me now is because I’m an older woman. We are in a moment of visibility like never before. What does that mean to you with the political backdrop of the Trump Administration? This president wants to eradicate us from the face of the earth. He doesn’t have a belief system and he’s not a politician. When he won this, my worry was that our community would become so fearful of what he may do, that they [might] run blindly into the closet and hide. This is a time that we can’t hide. We need to have our presence known. I don’t want to see trans people on the endangered species list. I’m hoping being out there myself that people will see me going on and believe that we can do this. There’s a lot of younger organizers and activists coming up now. Do you have any tips for folks doing this work? We have a right to be angry, but you have to be angry in degrees. You use your anger to come up with ways to dismantle the bullshit that is oppressing you in the first place. There has to be a way to manage this so you accomplish the goals you set out for yourself. It’s not an easy thing, but you must nurture, take care of, and look out for yourself too. If you don’t take the time to heal your wounds and soothe your ills, you can not be of any benefit to anybody else. What do you do for self-care, Mama Major?
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Black & Pink News
I’m a person that likes music and TV. I liked Big Band Era stuff like [George] Gershwin, Count Basie, Peggy Lee, Martha Washington, Dinah Washington, and Billie Holiday. On days when I’m feeling kind of icky, I’ll curl up with my dog, Moose, and watch TV. We’ve had her since my kidney surgery. If I need a little masculine attention, I’ll go get it.
At the time, we didn’t think of each other as legends. We were just young girls out there trying to have a good time. Crystal and I met on 34th and 8th Ave. getting ready to jump into the same car to turn a trick. He made a really sarcastic comment saying, “Well, I want the light skinned girl.” I got pissed the fuck off and so did she. We walked away and went to eat at Dunkin’ Donuts.
Were you ever married? Was there a desire for you to have that kind of life?
After all is said and done, what do want your legacy to be?
You know, I did [have that desire] when I was younger. My closest friend at the time was Crystal Labeija. She had the most beautiful wedding and I was one of her bridesmaids. Then, I said that’s what I wanted. Eventually, I thought, “Well, I’m an ex-hooker. One man? I don’t have time for that.” I liked having long, engaging romantic affairs for maybe three to six months [at a time]. Then I would bring somebody else in.
I would want my legacy to be: If ain’t right, fucking fix it, whatever it takes. I’d want to be remembered for trying to do the right thing and care for all people. We’re all part of one another. I would want people to understand who we are as human beings. I want us to look at the similarities more than the differences. This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.
I didn’t realize you and Crystal Labeija were so close. Y’all are both such legends. How did you meet her?
Miss Major in 2014 (Flickr Creative Commons, Quinn Dombrowski)
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OUR PRIDE 2019
Earlier this year we asked you, What Does PRIDE mean to you?, in celebration of Pride season. If you did not have a chance to respond, that is okay! Our next issue is all about Self-Care, and we want to have a discussion on what Self-Care is for you. So for our next issue, answer the question: What is Self-Care for you? Please submit your response with â&#x20AC;&#x153;Self-Care Responseâ&#x20AC;? written on your envelope! Our address can be found at the back of this issue! We look forward to receiving your responses <3 These were some of your PRIDE answers:
1) (What does Pride mean to me?) Proud, Rebel, Incredible, Divine, Eternity! Sincerely yours, MacKavelli Michael K. (IL)
Dear
Black
&
Pink
Family,
For so many years I was selfconscious. Always checking my speech, movements, mannerisms and dress. I was constantly using all of my energy when in public and family settings to hide myself. All of this was a direct result of 1 my upbringing, which taught me that gays were an abomination and all fags were going to die and burn in Hell for all eternity. And 2 the constant beatings I endured as a young child from my peers
who thought I was too girly and should be like the other boys. I am gay and any relationships or experiments growing up had to be hidden. I would lock myself in my room and gaze longingly at the TigerBeats and fashion magazines I would steal and hide behind a loose board in my closet like they were porn. For so long my wardrobe consisted of only jeans and T-shirts. I could never wear the clothes I fawned over. It sounds funny but looking back I was in prison even then.
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It wasn’t until I came to ManCI, over four years ago now, that I finally started to find myself. I had a saying that I would write everywhere I could with my blue sharpie, “I’ve gone to find myself... If I should return, before I get back... Please have me wait...” Who would have thought that all it would take was for me to come behind these walls. PRIDE to me means freedom. It means that I CAN stand out in a crowd. That I CAN take a chance and look for love. That I CAN act like myself, talk like myself, dress like myself. That I CAN be myself. I may be locked up for a little while, but I am finally free to be PROUD of who I am. And when I am released I will have the PRIDE that I have longed for all of these years. Be PROUD of yourself my family and stay strong. Know you are loved and even though we have never and may never be together I am always near. Christopher J. (OH)
Dear Black & Pink , It’s MAY!! Hi! It’s been a long while since I wrote, about 3 years or so. I’ve been itching to respond to a few letters now. First off, to Matt in OK. I’m glad I was able to touch your life. Even for somebody who is part of the LGBT community, can also be part of the TB/ADBL community and/ or the Furry/Babyfur community. I think meeting someone who is like me, the person you met and Ricky “AKA: Wiz Kid” (Texas), a lot of people look down more
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Black & Pink News
on us than the gay community. But were just like everybody else. But a lot of times, it’s either past traumas, sexual assaults, or even the age when we realize exactly who we really are, is usually around where our mentality regresses and we live our lives at that age. And the worst part of it is, we’re just as misunderstood as the rest of the gay community. Which leads me to the next and most itching response I’m responding to from May 2018 issue, is to my favorite from Texas, Ricky “Wiz Kid” I really loved your “When I Knew” poem in the March 2018 issue. I really do hope your not stuck in prison for life. I hope you can one day get out and go enjoy activities that you have missed out on. And even though it seems like it’s been three years till your letter was published, in response to my March 2015 letter, I am really glad you responded in such a way that you too built up enough courage to tell your story. I really do feel the same way you did. Your a knucklehead like me who was often bullied and abused as a kid. Like I’ve wrote before, after around 12 I had to shoplift/steal or buy my own diapers because I was a constant wetter. I’d figured you probley would have went through the same. But I did spent the night with others, had accidently wet their beds and then they got blamed for it. But I feel bad that I can’t be there for you, and vise versa for me. But soon I will be home and I can try to find you as a penpal and be able to write to you that way too. But for now the only way to shout out to each other is through here. I wish that some day I can meet you also. Maybe
one
day
we
will.
Thank you Wiz Kid for being somebody who cares and writes back to tell their story similar to mine. I’d like to hear others. Sorry it’s taken so long to respond and write back. To Ravyn (UT), Corderro L. (MO), Timothy (IL), and Christopher (OH), I know incarceration is a hard struggle. Spending your 20’s in prison, being gay and coming out, and having to constantly being looking back on your childhood, those of us who were abused, bullied, suicidal and the like, it seems to be driving point that defines us who we are. I myself was abused, bullied in school, was a bedwetter cause of it, and all in all, we got lead down a wrong road. Because of this, we developed PTSD, social anxiety disorders, became withdrawn into ourselves. Now we have an outlet. We have B&P. I wanna read and hear other stories like mine, like yours. Just let it all out. I wanna hear from people who are furries. People who are gay. People who have had a rough childhood like mine. Like Wiz Kid’s. Like the others I’ve mentioned above. Please let your stories and yourself be heard. To Polo in TX, in your March ’18 paper, I hope you enjoy it and take notice to the interests I’ve mentioned above. To Robbie M. in TX. I would like to know more information on book publishing if you could. And lastly, to MIKE in PA. Thank you for being that guy that really supports the LGBTQ+ community
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at its events. As you know, June 26th, 2015 marked a new era for the LGBTQ+ community. Now it’s May 26, 2019, a month to the day of it being 4 years old and the LGBTQ+ community is going strong. And to the rest of you knuckleheads. Stay strong and Blessed Be. -Max (OH) Editors Note: On June 26, 2015, the U.S. Supreme Court held in a 5–4 decision that the Fourteenth Amendment requires all states to grant same-sex marriages and recognize same-sex marriages granted in other states.
JUNE FEEDBACK Q: What does PRIDE mean to you? A: June 26th, 2015 marked the beginning of an new era for the LGBTQ community. It marked the Gay marriages we’re finally legal federally and by state despite the many controversies that rose during the Supreme court hearings. But me, I know I’ve been gay for a long while. And more now than ever, I support the LGBTQ community and show the pride of the rainbow colors. But specifically, I am 28 year old gay male furry. And that LiL’ wolf pup don’t give a hoot about what people say about or talk down about the LGBT community. Instead, I howl with joy and contentment knowing now that there is a community out there I can go to and take PRIDE in making our community known and how much we respect it.
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As part of the Furry Fandom and the LGBT community, we must take PRIDE in all our work and what we do and show the PRIDE to others, showing that we are confident in ourselves and in who we are. We are not mistake. We are not a disease. We are who we want to be. That is the free will that the Gods gave us. And we take Pride in using every bit of it. -Max “The Omega Wolf Pup” (OH) PRIDE is the feeling of being ourselves - unashamed, living to the FULLEST Notwithstanding and independent of What Might be deemed “right” or “normal” by a world under the influence of such illusion... Brandon H. (NC) Hello To All (Winyan Kte Nunpa) - Two Spirit Woman. Black And Pink Family Around The World Let me introduce myself. My name is Joseph R.S. , 42, Zodiac sign: Leo. Oglala LaKota Two Spirit Woman from Wounded Knee, S.D. on the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation. Raised in Poplar, MT, on the Fort Peck Indian Reservation. I am serving five years / of ten years for Aggravated Assault (Domestic Abuse) (Class 3 Felony) in the South Dakota State Penitentiary in Sioux Falls, South Dakota. Since 6-2514 to 6-21-19- initial parole date. I see the non-compliance board on 6-10-19. Prayers my Two Spirit Woman - Black and Pink Family. Like to say “I love you all you two spirit people around the world.” “Pure love endures thru all.”
To those enduring lifes pain, an struggles, your loved an not alone. “A willow branch bends, an brakes thru seasons, and heavy winds hardships, but a bushel of willow branches is strong, supportive, and endures what may come.” Keep your head up, and smiling thru it all. Much love! <3 Thank you all my two spirit family for all you do for one another, nice to meet you all in love & spirit. My two spirit family I would like to reply to the following question: What does “PRIDE” mean to you? For me PRIDE means - Enduring thru judgements of hatered, race, sexuality, religion beliefs, with endless love, happiness, kindness, humanity, honesty toward all. My love an prayers to you all! Love your sister, JoJo R.S. (AKA - Star) (SD)
Artwork by Megan J Smith courtesy of amplifer.org
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Summer 2019
The On The Inside Art Exhibition
Volume 10, Issue 3
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Letters from Our Inside Family To my Beloved LGBTQ Community, Hello everyone my name is NinMaay and this is my first time writing to you. I’m 24 years old I’m from Palestine, Texas but was raised in San Antonio, Texas. I’m currently a white male of 5’5”5’6” stature. My life has been Hell growing up. First off I got taken into Foster Care on April 9th, 1998 which is my 4th birthday. I was in foster care because my Mom molested me and she was always on drugs really bad. I went to school in several different towns/cities but, I mainly chose to represent my High School which was Thomas Jefferson High School (Go Mustangs!). I was a JROTC cadet with a rank of Private First Class (or E3 for those of you who know about PayGrade). I was on the Crimson Honore Guard Rifle Team and an NCOLS Graduate. I was on the TJHS Tennis Team and would’ve been Varsity if I would’ve stayed there until I graduated from 11th grade. On April 9th 2012 I aged out of foster care and went back to Palestine to reunite with my family after 14 years of being in the Foster Care system. A few days over 6 months of being home w/ my family on October 12, 2012 I got locked up for alleged rape. My court appointed attorney scared me into signing for 20 years. I have been fighting for my actual innocence ever since. My mom accepted my choice to be a T-girl and has been tryin’ to help me prove my innocence. I have an older “Sister” who I’d like to give
a shout out to... Miss Raven M. Rose on the Boyd Unit Love Ya Big Sis and Hope to see you soon! After Prison I plan to join w/ Black & Pink and advocate for our community. I also plan to join # Rainbow Palace and help out with anything I can but also offer up to have my up and coming company called #Gamerse@Play to be used as an Entertainment side to #Rainbow Palace. Anyways... Thanks for listening (reading!). Sincerely your T-Girl in Solidarity Nina-Maay (TX) Peace, Blessings, & Love, My name is Johnson (“Jay” for short). I’m currently doing 20 to life, courtesy of the state of Ohio. I’ve been aware of “B & P” for some time now and have to appreciate everything it stands for. Through the years, people have tries to fix their labels to me; homo, bi, pan... you know. what it means to be me. Here’s the obvious problem with that- the only person that will EVER define me is ME! Who am I? A male born, who grew into a proud man. A man who loves and wants to be loved. Truth is. I don’t know any other way to be, I believe in God, honor my parents, adore my sisters and absolutely love my 2 daughters and 12 nieces and nephews. I’m an artist and a music lover. In short... I’m just Jay.
I first kissed a girl when I was 7, a boy at 9, and trans woman at 17. I am open to love in all its forms. Which, unfortunately, means I’ve also been a victim of hatred in its many forms as well. I’ve been in A heartspace that lifted me to incredible heights. But also been used, beaten and left in dark places. Admittedly, I didn’t always live (nor love) the right way. Even today, I continue to reap bad seed I sown. On those occasions I’ve felt beat the hell up. One of the places I find solace is in these pages. Although, I know nothing was specifically directed towards me, I just want to thank you all. Thank you for the words of camaraderie and encouragement; for the inspirational stories, poems and art. Thank you for the sense of belonging and love I otherwise wouldn’t have. I love you May you be well, “Without wax” Jay Lorain Corre (OH)
Hello, My dear Friends, Brothers and Sisters of Black and Pink, See, I know that I seem to have very much a problem getting out or I don’t write to the correct people to get things done. Sooo. First, please allow me to introduce my lovely lady self. My birth name is Johnny Lee S.. But But let’s just face it, there is
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just way too many Johnny’s in my family. So I done some soul searching. I never really seen boys and men as the same sex my whole life and I always felt more like a Holly Lynn than a Johnny Lee. Soooo. Holly Lynn is what the world is gonna experience for now on. Anywho, my name is Holly Lynn and I’m 39 years young an 6’3 195 lbs and I don’t classify myself as white sooo. I say Native/ Irish American. Because I am 25% Cherokee and 25% Chactaw Native American and 50% Irish on both sides of my family. I’m pale and blond like an Irish person I can’t keep a tan period. But I have the facial features of a Native American and I don’t really grow facial hair either or body hair. I grow patches and spots. Weellll, I’m writing this letter to let my brothers and sisters know that if you are currently living with a cell ape who likes to steal from you to get whats truly on his mind or starts some shit with his homeboies to get what he wants from you. Don’t fall for it like I did and make sure that you make sure that the C/O’s log it instead of just move you around. Because they don’t want to do the extra paperwork before they go home cause it’s their Friday. And the C/O’s don’t care one way or another what really happens to you. Cause you are housed on closed custody which is one step above Ad. Segg and one step below minimum custody. On the Polunsky Unit on 8 building is all of the unit rejects and pretty soon all of B-Side is gonna be that way 8 building closed custody and 7 building minimum custody. This unit is a truly lock ‘em up/ write ‘em up unit. While I was on G-5-closed custody I was raped and nothing was done about it except
Summer 2019
Black & Pink News
the building Sargent moved me to another cell on another section but the same pod and swept everything under the rug cause it was his f-day and f this transexual/ homosexual f***** a** b*****. I’m not doing all of this paper work. Now that I know what to do I’ve don it just these C/O’s think that I’m trying to pull some kind of move to get shipped. I ain’t. The man stole $13.00 worth of stuff from me and forced me to go down on him almost every night he was in the ell with me. Now that I have a year to go for a chance to come up for parole I want to be case free and I can’t do that on this unit but I’m trying to. I’m trying to start up my meds up to help me feel better about myself when I see breast on my chest and then when I see dangglies between my legs gone. And then when all of the hair is gone will I truly feel my true self. But these C/O’s here are always psychological games on everyone. Like right now I am being housed in a cell on 11 building where the house Ph.D.’s and transit pending people/inmates/ offenders. Here they turn the heat on for 15-20 min then turn the air on full blast when it’s in the 30’s outside for 1 hour all day long. Then when you get sick you have to pay $100.00 for a copay each year. This is used in a means to torture everybody who is back here no matter what is going on. Cold and then hot causes pneumonia. Which is water in the lungs. But the C/O’s don’t care, they just say it because the thermostat is broken. But it never gets fixed because it ain’t broken in the first place. It only breaks when the C/O in the Pickett touches it to turn the A/C on full tilt..
Now this goes along with my rape issue. It too was psychologically done that way to show that there is no place for gay people in prison. Now that I’ve brought it up a year later thinking that it was handled right (logged in and recorded). It was not done and since I’m using someone who grabbed my booty a few times without my say so or wanting him to. They are investigating the other issue too as well now because I want it logged in and looked into as well. I’ve been caught wearing panties 3 or 4 times and nothing has been said or done about it. On 2 of the times I was allowed to keep my panties on and respected as a woman and one of them was a Sgt. and the other was a surprise to me a Nigerian. For those two I want to say thank you for the respect you gave me. I never asked to be in prison. I was forced to take this time from the judge in my court. I was forced to take this 19 years which I’m almost done with. I’ve got 6 years left to do. 3 years ago I was given a 4 year set off and was given every excuse that they had to give and to prove my point they took the STG reason off because I’m LGBT. - Holly Lynn Salute BP Family, Allow me to introduce myself, my handle is “Fly High” from Queens, NYC. I was born 4/20/1982 (“national weed day”). Im 36 y/o which makes me a ‘Taurusthe Bull.’ I would like to proudly declare today, on my b-day, that I am a bisexual man. I would like to thank in chronological order:
Volume 10, Issue 3
‘Jameela,’ my first guyrl-friend and flame when I was 19 y/o; also, ‘Tammy,’ my spanish fly who made my days better when prison was rough on us both when I was 27 y/o; ‘Michelle’ who was there for me emotionally reminding me to be myself, as I went back in the closet, and thought religion would purge me of myself. Most recently, big-up to Chance D Don and Black JazmineMarie, who encouraged me to be me. I officially declared my sexuality in my current prison as bi-sexual. I left the muslim religion. I confided in my Mother and sister and little brother who is effeminately-gay. I have not told my Dad. Also, I’ve been married to a woman (biologically/physiologically by birth) for 14 yrs. I have not confided in her. Im afraid to lose her, break her heart, do to her not willing to understand. This feels like the biggest dilemma of my life Family, and I can humbly say Im afraid. We’ve been through so much over the 14 yrs I’ve been in prison. I met her the year I came to prison. She was 19 y/o I was 21/y/o. She was a virgin, and I deflowered her on our first conjugal visit when she was 25 y/o & I was 27 y/o, around the time I met Tammy, I just mentioned. Not only did I cheat on her, but I did it around the time I took her virginity. Actually two months before. But I intend to tell her February 2019, which is my max-out release date. I feel she deserves to look me in the face, so we can cry together, and decide together if we shall remain together. I feel this is the more honorable way to deal with it, rather than by phone or through a letter. Also, I can’t help but imagine what it would be like to be in a LTR with a trans-woman.
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Our Queenz are so unique, so beautiful, so compatible, that it is hard not to wonder. And what’s ‘so real’ is that, I’m determined to be with a Queen, in spite of what the outcome of my marriage may be. Before I go, I’d like to shout out and send my deepest regards to Mama Rachael (CA) with her ‘Untitled’ poem in Vol. 9 Issue 2. Your poem was so heartfelt! Whats crazy is. Im attracted to older ladies. I’ve never been with a woman Mama Rachael age, in all due respects. But if the Creative forces allow it, I would like to write you big mama, to show some love and support for all your struggles you’ve been through on our behalf. I know... you may feel love, but not appreciated! Im gone family... I leave as I came: As Real and As Rare As They Come! Ethereally Yours, Fly High (NY)
I am an inmate here at C.C.I. in OH. I really despise that word inmate because though the state of Ohio may possess my physical self for the four years and the next four to come, they will never have control over my mind, body, and spirit. I walked through the past 34 years of my life strongly attracted to men, and feeling like a female; my mannerisms, features, body, the whole nine yards. I even sold and wore many Kay cosmetics but never fully came out to family and friends on how I felt and hiding the real person deep inside my soul. So this past year, I grew balls. (On my chest that is) LOL! and I told my parents one evening on the phone. It was hard but it needed to be done and they accepted it and me with love. I’m extremely fortunate. I read in your recent Dec 17/ Jan 18 issue about Tomcat; what a brave soul. I tried being this tough, hairy, and
Artwork by Josh MacPhee courtesy of amplifer.org
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bulky man here in prison, but the true female in me just kept kicking to the surface and screaming to be set free. So, I opened up about who I was and sweet release. What a feeling. I broke off a current relationship because I just couldn’t be me. Now, I’m living for the first time in my life, being true to my inner- most depths and I’m doing so clear and sober and I’m doing it with meaning and purpose and I’m having a blast doing me. It took me coming to prison and losing my outside freedom to find my true self. Don’t get me wrong, not everything is coming up roses. We, yes we, (we meaning a large group of my friends and I) must be careful because this place and staff discriminate against all of us and look for any excuse to kick us out of privileged housing. However, I’m resilient and I don’t let much get me down. I can’t; I refuse. Thats part of my character, that being said, I just have to tell all of my family at Black and Pink, and the entire LGBTQ community: thank you. Your stories and writers are profound. Thanks to Monica (NV) I feel you, congrats! To sincere bBaby, be like me, an
Artwork by Josh Macphee courtesy of amplifer.org
Black & Pink News
overcomer. Damon (OH), love you bro; your words helped. Tomcat (CO), honey you are absolutely courageous... shine on! Thank you all for welcoming me with open arms, I feel the love and I send right back to you all the love you give out. Thank you, Ryan, A.K.A STAR! (OH) Editor’s Note: one of the shout outs in this letter accidentally got cut in the formating process. We apologize.
My dearest Sisters and Brothers, Hey y’all it’s Talia (aka Lady Jade)(aka Jade). I wanted to write to you to let you know what ive been doing to try and help us all here in MD. Those of you I was with at MCTC know a lil bit but not much, so here’s some background on me- 2013 I came out as trans (on the street) lived a year as me until 2015 when I was set to legally get hormones. Sadly, a week before I go to pick up the prescriptions I was falsely accused of solicitation of a minor and found guilty based solely on hearsay and testimony that the state admitted contained lies. I was naïve and thought my PD was giving me good advice not to take a jury trial because I never before had to go to trial. I got fucked by the legal system in MD. I was sent to MCTC in same city and immediately dealt with harassment and shit, some of which came from the “girls” who said I wasn’t a real trans cuz I didn’t meat-gaze and chase dick and don’t enjoy sex. (I’m a rape and molestation survivor) the officers tried to break me, wrote bullshit tickets and at one point convinced my cell buddy to lie and claim I was bullying him for sex (he admitted it was a lie to the investigator) then when on lock up I was kept in a cell with a man who threatened my form day one repeatedly and the guards did nothing, I was taken to ER with chest pains and erratic EKGs but since I was only having a terror induced panic attack I was not admitted and they put me BACK IN THAT CELL! 4 days later he assaulted me and guards did nothing so I threatened suicide the next shift and they were forced
to take me out of the cell. The
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nurse logged it and I was put on suicide watch til the next day when I told psych what happened and he ordered me put in a different cell. I ended up beating the false ticket and got shipped out. Anyway I ended up getting my hormones in august 2016 and have been getting taken for steady updates. When I got to central laundry I began to advocate for continued treatment beyond hormones writing letters to everyone including head of mental health for MD, head of medical services of public safety and even the top guy in DPSCS the secretary of public safety. In my letters I explained the need to offer housing with the women for those who want it. Now for me I was issued bras, given permission to order panties and women’s clothes from catalogs and I got only strip searched of patted down by female officers here and other institutions. What’s better is that the regional treatment team has referred me to the gender dysphoria consultant who is going to be meeting me and telling them what additional treatment should be provided. Also I am writing to hear back from the secretary of public safety about my letter in which I suggested the institution of a preference form to allow trans and GNC people to share at intake if they are confortable with/ feel safe being strip searched by male or female officers and what pronouns they prefer. I also suggested he require offciers to either use the preffered pronouns or none at all when dealing or communicating with trans and gender non conforming people and my final suggestion to him was that he institute a policy where trans people are given the
Volume 10, Issue 3
option of being housed with people of our gender as opposed to being housed by our sex. I laid out all the potential auguments that could be made and then gave the ansers that would invalidate those arguments like for example explaining how since most trans women identify as straight women we aren’t going to want to have sex with a women on top of the fact that many of us are very uncomfortable with our penis and want it gone so don’t want to use it or like in my case have been on HRT long enough that we cant (thank goodness) even achieve an erection. I explained how we are basically the only one(s) of our gender in a living situation with hundreds of people of the other gender. I explained how its at all times alienating and isolating for some of us when people aren’t secure enough to befriend us or talk to us or play cards/pool etc with us placing us in a non segregated solitary confinement of sorts. I explained that some of us are comfortable being around people of our sex and want to be and have an ok time but laid out how it should be up to us if we feel safer with men or women since the PREA standards ay “our own views of where we will be safest shall be given serious considerations” (loosely paraphrased) I explained how each of our situations is different and so decisions should be made on a case to case basis or as PREA states “individual assessments”. I told him why pronouns are important to affirm our identity and failure to use correct ones are harmful when it is intentional. I quoted how the PREA training requirements for staff say they are to be trained how to effectively and professionally communicate with all inmates including gay,
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lesbian, bisexual, transgender, intersex, and gender nonconforming inmates. I detailed how intentionally using pronouns that we don’t identify with or are inaccurate for our gender is harmful and can cause serious mental emotional trouble for some of us, and therefore is disrespectful and is not a “professional and effective” communication method. I have set a precedent for us already in MD by insisting on being searched by staff of my gender not sex. Now I am working on getting policies and precedents in place as far as the treatment for gender dysphoria following the WPATH standards of car. I requested electrolysis/laser hair removal and also am seeking surgery. I sent letters to everyone involved and on April 27th my case will be reviewed by the regional treatment team and I have been referred to the GD consultant who is in the process of reviewing my records and will recommend the additional treatments that are appropriate. Now let me say this though, if you want to walk this path towards gender change you must advocate for yourself. They are not going to just do for everyone what they for one and unless you speak up they are going to just blow you off. Also if they day no stand up for yourself, write to the medical director for your region of state, write to the psych director, write to the head of DOC in your area, write to any outside resources and make sure to cc everyone and a few outside parties like NCLR or NCTE (national center for lesbian rights/ national center for trans equality) or even the ACLU and on your letter note that you have cc’ed these people so they know that you mean business. Also keep your original date the
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letter and make copies and send the copies! That way if they say we didn’t get it you can say that okay I have another copy I’ll send to you via certified mail. Then do so. Remember they expect you/us to give up or lose hope but if you make it a point to show them you are not going anywhere and keep refusing to take no for an answer and keep your name in front of them they will have to pay attention. Do not give up, even if they tell you no 99 times and 100 times or however long it takes. Eventually they will be forced to help especially if you had been in contact with outside groups and they know that. They don’t want a lawsuit no matter how it may seem. Remember this also, if we can get certain treatments and accommodations etc for ourselves it will set a precedent and help make it easier for other girls/guys to get the same things. Lastly if you get/ win something teach your brothers and sisters how to do so. Also don’t leave them in the dark… help each other!! Sometimes we are all we have and the cards are stacked against up so if you see a sister or brother in trouble help them! If you see a LGBTQIA sister brother person in need help them!!! Stop being catty and petty and hating on each other and left each other up. Together we can be powerful and a light in the darkness. Come together as a community you know this prison shit is real painful and terrifying so don’t isolate any of the LGBTQIA people. Let them know they’re not alone, let them know they’ve got family that cares about them, let them know they’re loved. In love and light its everyone’s sister, Lady Jade (MD)
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Summer 2019
MAIL UPDATE
Hello Family!
When I started working for Black and Pink in January of 2019, we were extremely behind in our mail processing. I am ecstatic to say with the help of countless volunteers, staff, and community members, we have been able to catch up to this summer’s mail! While we are still processing your requests, adding you to the Newsletter list, pen pal program, etc. your requests are received and getting processed! I want to always reassure you that someone is reading your words, and we take great care in doing our utmost to meet your requests in a timely manner. I also want to thank everyone for helping our mail room staff by marking your envelopes with your specific requests. For example, if you are writing to us asking for the Newsletter, indicated that on the outside of your letter. If you are requesting multiple things, do write them all! This allows us to process your mail faster and far more effectively! We are so grateful that so many of you have aided in this system! We are honored to read your words and be in solidarity with you. Thank you. Be good to one another <3 In Warmth, Kimberley O’Donnell National Communications Manager, Black and Pink
The full list of “Request Types”is on the last page of this Newsletter
Volume 10, Issue 3
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Poetry from Our Inside Family I SHOW MY PRIDE! I embrace this life with mad love Because it fits me like a glove I don’t cry about the hate Instead I grab my bat and step to the plate If I fall down I will not lay on the ground I will rise And give my haters a surprise I will stand with my girls on the line And we will be fine Hair and nails on fleet Chanting “we won’t be beat” You can shake us But you can’t break us Place us in chains But our unity remains They have murdered some of us But pushing on is a must So this is why I don’t hide I show my PRIDE! Pulse The Pulse within will still beat Your ammunition did not cause the Pulse’s defeat A Pulse was still heard even when the smoke cleared The excitement of Pulse is what you feared Pulse is a place of unity Pulse is an open community Without a Pulse we are dead Your hatred had a Pulse, stuck in your head
Our Pulse is steady and long The victims died with a Pulse, so strong Your guns Pulse, seized My heart’s Pulse, squeezed That day Pulse, bled A tragedy at Pulse, the media said But really it was a Pulse, misled And still our Pulse, is not dead Shaylanna “Queen City Shay” L, NY
“Seed Of Love”
“Oh my Goodness” Fleeing manhood, Embracing a new virginity, all along I have stood expecting some divinity. Sometimes it finds me, sometimes I search Whenever it finds me, I’m not in a church. Temple or circle, good goddess roam, temple and circle God is not alone
You planted a seed, deep within the soil of my heart,
James (IL)
Your friendliness, opens the seed pod within my heart,
“Ain’t I a Woman”
Your caring, takes root within my heart, Your openess, sprouts the seedling thru the soil within my heart, Your trust, strengthes the stem within my heart, Your embracing, feeds the thorns, leaves, an buds within my heart, Your unconditional love for me, blooms open the beautiful roses you planted deep within my heart, “I love you L.J. Moran!” Written by: Joseph R.S. (SD)
Today I woke up and looked in the mirror, and asked myself. Ain’t I a woman? With long hair that I pull over my face when stressed. But am ok after Just knowing that I’m blessed? My beautiful eyes that I wink with a smile, come when I swish my hips. Unconsciously aware of all the stares that come when I dip my hips. Into a nice slow rhythm, that I know will attract. Attention for my beautiful black soul, that shows my culture’s intact. Ain’t I a woman? Who came from the loins of all those women before me. Who understood the pressure
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Black & Pink News
and pain that would be associated with these. Beautifully crafted legs of a gazelle. That are caramel coated and built to excel. Don’t you see the dreams in the eyes of this spectacular creature? And how she steps around the traps that predators have set for her? Oh, what a sight it is but still so sad. That in this day and age she still has to ask. Ain’t I a woman? Isabella (WA) I watched as he came strolling in He is dark and handsome and pretty thin. All he did was walk into the room and I thought I would skyrocket to the moon. One day he sat on his bunk looking pretty hot When I glanced up I thought he noticed me, or not. With the turnaround this place has I wondered if he would stay Then I got to wondering -- could he be gay? There is no way it could be true But if he was -- what would I do? It turns out he actually is gay So it seems good luck might come my way. He wasn’t “out” really Until he met a guy named Eli Now Eli ended up not being happy for his friend He yelled it out loud to everyone he could, in the end. There is no purpose to this story, and I hope it wasn’t too boring But one thing you know is right Pick good friends and don’t fight. As far as the cutie in this rhyme
Don’t worry he’s not mine But in the end He is still a friend. Ronald (OR) COME BACK Where did you come from? Where did you go? Will you come back or don’t you know? Or will you get scared and keep running away forgetting feelings that wont go away You cant shake it or fake it these feeling inside. if youd just stop running ill be by your side Forever your queen forever my king, for the rest of my life or until the world end i’ll love you, you’ll see that you can’t hide and these feelings of memories of moments lost in time And the sooner you realize the better i’ll be and my love will always be here for you from me Kee Kee Keith (PA) “Poem” When days are long, and nights never end Remember you have a best friend. When there are many trials to bear,
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And no one seems to really care; When all your mountains Seem to erupt, and you feel like giving up, When all your plans have gone away, You just can’t face another day; Don’t give up, you have me, “Miley.” Miley (PA) Freestyle Dear Black and Pink fam check me out pretty boi idhs Haters keep hating cause they Know i’m bi They can’t stand to see me every time I walk by ima embrace myself thats just how i feel you wanna hate on my cause you know i’m being real I ain’t never been fake thats just how it is Been through the pain and hurt that’s everyday of life ima stand for our rights like its my last life cause you only live one in this hard life where’s the respect promised to us if we stand and fight People always try to take away our gay rights If we stand as a family no one can take us down cause the love we have is ever lasting life But we gon’ live today to fight another fight so live on, so live on, so live on Fight another fight Sincerely yours, Pretty boi idhs feedback welcome TX PrettyBoi idhs (TX)
Volume 10, Issue 3
“What We Living Like” (Rap verse/poem) You ain’t never been back against the wall ***** Tossed in the kennel had to scrap with the dogs ***** Brawl til your knuckles turned raw against the system I’ll paint a lil picture for the image of the missing Listen *****, aint no amber alerts Aint no hand from you manz reaching down in this dirt They drowning in work but they farther out of sight And if they had a penny for you, you’ll be farther out in life “right” We can really get it on ten toe’s down we can really get us home Put your heart in your hustle lil smart’s lil muscle Lil scuffle on the yard ***** spark you a buster **** ‘em it’s the land of the lawless You judge for your sins like they stand up flawless The bosses but gossip like **** on the low On the low ***** gossiping like **** is a no No I don’t really know about it my good died young all I really know is hobbit’s The scaliest skin with an aliens grin ****** shell’s turned pale couldn’t tell we was men Failed to defend so we headed to the cage Were 20 year bits make you deadly in some spades The deadliest of rage redirected at your peers When it the government officials giving ****** all these years And we day to day living
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That mean you get 40 then it’s 40 that you giving Your shorty turn inches and her inches turn grown Your shorty bout to have a shorty and you still aint made it home Make it known it’s a struggle and it started out black It turnt into the cash everybody got attacked Everybody on this track 20 better to an “L” so if a ***** don’t sell least a ***** won’t fail Y’all get to see Get to see What we living like What we living lik What we living like Y’all get to see Get to see What we living like What we living lik What we living like Edward (MI) My Spirit Can’t Be Broken (A Poem by Amber) People will hate! People will discriminate! People will always find a reason! To try and lessen the value of who I am and what community I represent. But I will not tolerate my spirit to be broken! I am not weak! I am not insecure and I am not confused! I am a trans-woman who will stop at nothing to be treated as an equal in a society of extreme prejudice and sadistic hatred towards anyone who is Different. I am strong! I am beautiful! I am proud! And though times get rough and I just want to give up,
I will not let hatred and discrimination as well as ridiculing words of ecil and indifference break my spirit. I cannot help that I feel like a woman! I cannot help the thought and belief in my heart and mind that I am a woman in a male’s body. And feel as if I cannot break free of this body I have been wrongfully put inside. But I will not give up! I once was broken to the discrimination and the ridicule to the point that I heavily sunk into a broke state. But now I’ve reached a point of unbearable strength. Pride, secureness, and a very powerful need to fight for my rights and stand proud against hatred because hatred always bows down in the presence of love and pride. Because hatred is only insecurity and loneliness, but Love is far more powerful and love is security. The ability to pity the hatred against you to the point that hatred only empowers you to fight against it with love and understanding, and that will help you develop more pride! So transwomen, as well as everyone in the LGBTQ community, you are all very very beautiful and you are so loved. And people like me and Black & Pink truly love you all. So live be these words; I am Beautiful! I am who I am! I am proud! And my spirit can’t be broken! Amber (NV)
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Precious Moments A moment with you, then it’s gone. Precious, treasured, till the next one comes. Days I go without you here. Missing you, then I’m with you, grinning ear to ear. Sweetheart, please! I need you home. Hang in there, we’ll be married in Rome. Precious moments, held in time. Close to my heart, never sold, not for a dime. I miss you lots, I cry each night. I wish you home to hold me tight. Precious moments, washed in tears. Come home my love, relieve my fears. Dear Heart of Mine Dear heart of mine, my will is thine, tell me your wishes three. “I wish for the sum, the moon, the stars and I’d give them all to thee.” Well I wish for peace, for joy, and love. For all let freedom reign. That we’ll be happy and love is long, and never part again. Dear heart of mine, my will is thine and this you know is true. I love you more than life itself and all I want is you. Beloved, honey, you’re my sweet surrender. Oh how I hate to wait. But you are right, my love divine, if only for safety’s sake. Dear heart of mine, my will is thine as we gaze up at the stars. Our love knows no bounds, together we are as we travel near and far. You shine like the sun. I love you so, for starlight is in your eyes. To cuddle with you as sunset falls
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watching happily side by side. Dear heart of mine, my will is thine. Your light shines on the world. For all to see, your heart’s with me, as future is unfurled. Peace will reign for a thousand years upon your world so bright. My search was long, was sad, and hard. I’ve found my Mr. Right. Dear heart of mine, my will is thine, our hearts are one and the same. I’ve half of yours and half of mine. We called each other and we came. We are each other’s anchor and mirrors too. Beloved Angel you’re army side. You are my precious devil, too. Sweetheart you no longer need to hide. Dear heart of mine, my will is thine, your past is dark and painful. Come to me and let me see, I’ll heal your hurts so baneful. You think you’re evil, dark, and bad. Your family tends to agree. You keep your anger and hold it tight. Please let me set you free! Dear heart of mine, my will is thine. I disagree with you. You are not evil, bad, or wrong and I’m in love with you. I see you bright and full of love, just looking for a home. You’ve found one in me, so precious please, I beg you, please come home! End For my loving husband, I’m forever yours. And for all those who fall in love with a “bad” boy, it’s worth it so hang in there. -Aria Kyle (ID)
PESONIFIED!!! STONE WALLS AND BARBED WIRE. THE BARRICADE THAT KEEPS ME HIDDEN FROM SOCIETY. BARBARIC CONDITIONS, HOUSED IN MODERN DAY CAVES. LIVING OFF THE LAND, BREAKING MY BACK FOR PENNIES, MODERN DAY SLAVE. SLEEPLESS NIGHTS, STRESSFUL DAYS. MEAN MUGGING FOR NOTHING, ANTI-SOCIAL TRAITS. DIAGNOSIS, BI-POLAR WITH DEPRESSION. TESTOSTERONE ON STEROIDS. MENIACLE WORKOUTS TO RELEASE MY PENT-UP AGGRESSION. IM STUCK IN A WORLD BETWEEN LIFE AND DEATH. PACING THE HALLS OF A TOMB WAITING TO DIE, FIGHTING FOR LIFE WITH EVERY BREATH. SLAVE MENTALITY MY EVERY THOUGHT IS ESCAPE. FOOT ON NECK, CONSTANT OPPRESSION. MY REFLECTION IS ANGRY, MY ALTER EGO IS RAGE. BATTLE TESTED, FIGHTING A WAR OF ATTRICTION. EVERYTHING UNDER SUSPICION. A DAY WITHOUT CONFLICT, I START TO MISS IT. A GLADIATORS GLADIATOR, THE COLISEUMS CHAMPION SOCIETYS CAST AWAY. SINKING IN THE SAND IM STANDING IN. FACE OF THE ABANDONED MEN, A SOLDIERS RECRUIT.
Shades of Gray (Michael) PA
Volume 10, Issue 3
Judge Me Not Hold back your hatred Speak only words of aspiration For you never know when the distasteful Will become your fascination If you constantly fixate On all the things that other people do You’ll end up skipping a wonderful life And all the things that could happen for you Focus on yourself And all the things you would like to try Because the days are short And you never know exactly when you may die Charles (KY) Sweet Autumn by Vyht Versai Her name was Autumn And in her eyes was a forest on fire Hot Burning Blazing inferno of future hope She touched me Intimately A beautiful soul whose life Lasted but a moment A memory of Smoke & ash Nature’s passion unleashed I remember her smile Full of mischief Longing for fairytale adventures I gave her my heart Sweet Autumn Let her Feast on my yin
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She reminds me of Myself shattered into a thousand prayers Falling into leaves of eternity Falling into seasons of immortal Shawn (OR) ~Beauty~ They say that beauty is... in the eye of the beholder... But to me that implies... That if those who see me... Don’t say I’m beautiful... Then I’m not... Have we not grown at all in the eons of time that we fail to realize that Beauty is NOT in the eye of those who see it or don’t, it just is... Beauty is... Those things that are beautiful... Just because someone says... This, that, he, she, you, me, it is not beautiful Can not change whether or not it is... Beauty is... Those things that are beautiful... Beauty is... That shining light within... Beauty is... A childs first breath... Beauty is... Sunrise after a dark night... Beauty is... Undying love... Beauty is... creation, life, joy, waking up to... your own divinity Beauty is... The things we want to see as beautiful... Beauty is... Me, you, him, her, them, us... A kiss... A breath...
All around us... if we just open our eyes... we will know... we are all beautiful... or at least we can be... if we just let ourselves... Beauty is... Those things that are beautiful... Beauty is... A fact, not an opinion... I’m beautiful because... I say so, Because I am the beholder Because I’m me... ~Fin~ Lady Jade (MD “Alone” Alone she lay Alone she cried She didn’t pray An infant? Why? Alone she laid Alone she cried This child prayed She wished she died Alone she laid Alone she cried The little girl prayed But she had not died Alone she laid Alone she cried This lonely lady prayed As she died inside Alone she lay She did not cry She wouldn’t pray Cause he never died Shannon (MI)
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Summer 2019
Black & Pink News
Call for Submissions Seeking erotic short stories, poems, and art by Black & Pink incarcerated and free-world family members for a new zine. To be mailed, art cannot include full nudity. Please send submissions (and shout out to the authors from the first issue mailed in January!) addressed to Black & Pink — HOT PINK. This is a voluntary project, and no money will be offered for submissions, but you might get the chance to share your spicy story with many other readers! The zine will be sent one or two times per year. To subscribe to upcoming issues of HOT PINK, write to our address, Black & Pink — HOT PINK.
Black & Pink Mailing Information Write to us at: Black & Pink 6223 Maple St #4600 Omaha, NE 68104 Please note that you can send multiple requests/ topics in one envelope! Due to concerns about consent and confidentiality, you cannot sign up other people for the newspaper. However, we can accept requests from multiple people in the same envelope. There’s no need to send separate requests in more than one envelope.
If you are being released and would still like to receive the Black & Pink News, please let us know where to send it! Penpal program info: LGBTQ prisoners can list their information and a short non-sexual ad online where free-world people can see it and decide to write. There will be forms in upcoming issues. Mail info: We are several months behind on our mail. There will be a delay, but please keep writing! Email us: members@blackandpink.org
If you would like to request: If you would like to request:
Address the envelope to: Address the envelope to:
Newspaper Subscriptions, Penpal Program, Address Change, or Volunteering
General
Newspaper Submissions — Stories, Articles, Poems, Art
Newspaper Submissions
Black & Pink Organization or Newspaper Feedback
Feedback
Black & Pink Religious Zine
The Spirit Inside
Advocacy Requests (include details about the situation and thoughts about how calls or letters might help)
Advocacy
Submit to or request Erotica Zine
HOT PINK
Stop Your Newspaper Subscription
STOP Subscription
Queer Liberation March 30 June 2019, NYC ( Flickr Creative Commons, Elvert Barnes) Queer Liberation March 30 June 2019, NYC ( Flickr Creative Commons, Elvert Barnes)
San Francisco Pride 2019 (Flickr Creative Commons, Quinn Dombrowski) Penn State Pride Weekend 2019 (Flickr Creative Commons, Penn State)