I’m A Circle, You’re A Square by Blue Beetle Books

Participant Manual

I’m a Circle You’re a Square Effective Workplace Communication Ingrid Vaughan

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w o r k s h o p s your passion

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w o r k s h o p s your passion

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w o r k s h o p s your passion

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I’m a Circle – You’re a Square Effective Workplace Communication An Encore Workshop developed by Ingrid Vaughan

Participant Manual Author: Ingrid Vaughan

To order an Encore Workshop please visit our website www.encoreworkshops.com

Encore Workshops is an imprint of Small Business Success (a division of Blue Beetle Books Inc.)

Blue Beetle Books Inc. www.bluebeetlebooks.com www.smallbusinesssuccess.ca

Tel: 778.265.3070 Email: janie@bluebeetlebooks.com

© 2012 All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, transmitted in any form or by any means electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, or stored in a retrieval system without the prior written consent of Encore Workshops.

Encore Workshops If you would like to find out more about Encore Workshops please visit our website www.encoreworkshops.com.

table of contents 7

Introduction

Looking Back

Looking In

Looking Out

Dealing with Difficult People

Communicating Through Conflict

INTRODUCTION

Ever wondered why one of your team is happier with her door closed and never seems to want to engage in conversation? Does the employee who dominates every staff meeting drive you crazy? Ever thought about why some people always need time to â&#x20AC;&#x153;think things over?â&#x20AC;?

Effective Workplace Communication teaches you basic personality and work styles that will enable you to finally understand the people you work with. Just understanding is not enough however; this workshop takes you one step further and gives you the tools you need to help you communicate more effectively with your managers and the rest of your colleagues.

I’m a Circle—You’re a Square—Participant Workbook

What are you going to learn?  Examining your communication history  Looking at your communication models  Evaluating your own communication patterns  Understanding communication styles  The four behavioural styles  Communication strategies  The Art of Flexing to others  How to Handle Negativity  Dealing with Difficult People  Using tact and skill in difficult situations  Strategies for dealing with difficult people  Knowing when to let go  Communication Through Conflict  Developing assertive communication skills  Strategies for moving through conflict effectively  Steps to diffusing anger  Finding common ground  Keys to successful conflict resolution

© 2012 All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, transmitted in any form or by any means electronic , mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, or stored in a retrieval system without the prior written consent of Encore Workshops.

I’m a Circle—You’re a Square—Participant Workbook

What Are Your Expectations? Take a few moments and list the expectations you have for this workshop. Your facilitator will offer you an opportunity to discuss these at the beginning of the session. 



Your Challenges Consider the challenges you face surrounding the subject of this workshop and jot down a few of them in the boxes below. This may help you identify questions you might like to ask your instructor as the workshop progresses. 



ÂŠ 2012 All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, transmitted in any form or by any means electronic , mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, or stored in a retrieval system without the prior written consent of Encore Workshops.

Module One

Looking Back Module one encourages you to take a look back at your communication historyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the lessons you learned about communication from your family when growing up. It then goes on to look at the various communication styles and primary and secondary communication models. From here you will look at how the past has modelled your current communication style. During this session will make some very interesting and personal discoveries about themselves. You will then have the opportunity of defining and learning more about your own communication style.

I’m a Circle—You’re a Square—Participant Workbook

Examining Your Communication History What words did you hear?      

What patterns did you see?      

What lessons did you learn?       The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn’t being said. Peter F. Drucker

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Notes _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________

I’m a Circle—You’re a Square—Participant Workbook

Looking at Your Models Communication Styles Passive I’ll do it your way - I lose you win Aggressive You’ll do it my way - I win you lose Passive/Aggressive I’ll say I’m doing it your way but I’ll do what I want - I win Assertive Let’s do it in a way where we both get something we want - we both win

Primary Communication Models

Secondary Communication Models Siblings

Teachers

Extended Family

Peers

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I’m a Circle—You’re a Square—Participant Workbook

Evaluating Your Communication Patterns Factors That Contribute to Your Communication Pattern . . . Your Reaction to What You Were Modelled ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Your Personality ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ Your Level of Self-Esteem ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________

They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel. Carl W. Buechner

© 2012 All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, transmitted in any form or by any means electronic , mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, or stored in a retrieval system without the prior written consent of Encore Workshops.

I’m a Circle—You’re a Square—Participant Workbook

Understanding Your Communication Style Defining Your Style

Passive/Aggressive

© 2012 All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, transmitted in any form or by any means electronic , mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, or stored in a retrieval system without the prior written consent of Encore Workshops.

Module Two

Looking In The journey of self-discovery continues in module two where you will carry out an exercise that will help you look at the strengths and weaknesses of your communication style. For the purposes of this workshop the behavioural style names used are: the square, the triangle, the squiggle and the circle. You will learn the attributes, primary needs, strengths and weaknesses of each style, so that you can gain an understanding of each of the styles you will come across when dealing with co-workers, management and customers.

I’m a Circle—You’re a Square—Participant Workbook

Who Am I . . . And Why Do I Do the Things I Do? Strengths Please complete the following exercise. 1.

Choose the attribute in each row that best describes you.

Only check off 1 box in each row across.

Then add the total of each column.

You can make more friends in two months by becoming really interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you. Dale Carnegie

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 Animated

 Adventurous

 Analytical

 Peaceful

 Playful

 Persuasive

 Respectful

 Loyal

 Sociable

 Strong-willed

 Orderly

 Good listener

 Spontaneous

 Competitive

 Scheduled

 Tolerant

 Funny

 Resourceful

 Detailed

 Diplomatic

 Demonstrative

 Outspoken

 Deep

 Consistent

 Inspiring

 Confident

 Thoughtful

 Contented

 Fun

 Frank and direct

 Precise

 Balanced

 Talkative

 Independent

 Organized

 Adaptable

 Innovative

 Decisive

 Balanced

 Controlled

 Bouncy

 Leader

 Perfectionist

 Nurturing

 Popular

 Tenacious

 Chart-maker

 Patient

 Spirited

 Bold

 Persistent

 Friendly

 Cheerful

 Productive

 Reserved

 Inoffensive

 Entertainer

 Positive

 Planner

 Mediator

 Convincing

 Action-oriented

 Sensitive

 Peace-loving

 Optimistic

 Self reliant

 Accurate

 Controlled

 Creative

 Risk-taker

 Researcher

 Likeable

 Enthusiastic

 Sure

 Logical

 Team player

 Motivating

 Forward-thinker

 Frugal

 Agreeable

Total

I’m a Circle—You’re a Square—Participant Workbook

Who Am I . . . And Why Do I Do the Things I Do? Weaknesses Please complete the following exercise. 1.

Choose the attribute in each row that best describes you.

Only check off 1 box in each row across.

Then add the total of each column.

When you have finished both the strengths and weaknesses assessments add the total score in all 4 columns from both tests for a grand total (use the table show at the bottom of this page).

The column with the highest score is your primary personal style; the column with the second highest score is your secondary style.

GRAND TOTAL Column A_____ Column B_____ Column C_____ Column D_____

© 2012 All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, transmitted in any form or by any means electronic , mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, or stored in a retrieval system without the prior written consent of Encore Workshops.

Encore Workshops - an imprint of Small Business Success (a wholly owned subsidiary of Blue Beetle Books Inc.)

If you would like to review the full manual, or discuss your current training needs please call our customer service manager Janie Dunning at 778.265.3070 or email janie@bluebeetlebooks.com.

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Small Business Success will also develop workshops to meet your specific needs. For s more k hinformation o p splease visit w o r k s h o p s www.smallbusinesssuccess.caindex.php/training/custom_training_workshops program your passion • our program

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o r k s h o p s •

our program

your passion

our program

w o r k s h o p s your passion

•

our pro

•

w o r k

our program

w o r k your passion

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our pro