8 minute read
SilVER SERViCE
By Duncan Bennett, Member #4171
Atrip to Las Vegas is perfect for a 25th silver wedding anniversary, slightly more so than a trip to Cairns. But Cairns was firmly within the present allowable travel perimeter, and Las Vegas wasn’t, so Cairns it was. A Friday afternoon flight successfully boarded giving the appearance we were going to fit the face mask while never quite bothering to do so, in a mere 2½ hours we landed on the narrow strip of available land just north of the city. The romance pack had been provided by the Shangri-La Hotel, in the form of a bottle of bubbly, and around then the actual activity planning for the weekend started to ramp up out on the balcony. A jet-ski tour had been booked for Saturday morning, and a reef cruise for Sunday, but what about the free period on Saturday post-11am? On a third top-up of sparkling, a brilliant idea was conceived. Why don’t we hire motorcycles?!? The Cairns motorcycle hire scene can be a little disappointing unless you are chasing a 50cc scooter, an engine-free motorcycle a.k.a a bicycle, or a Harley with an engine capacity larger than a Panamax tanker. The Harley option was nearly on except they didn’t have anything available, so we called the unpromising sounding Cairns Scooter and Bicycle Hire. How many motorcycles do we need they asked? Two, Cindy answered. What a coincidence, we only have two! OK, we’ll take them! So, off to dinner. The Shangri-La is only two stories high but was apparently built before stairs were invented so the only way to get up or down involved a very long march to the lifts. Hang-on, I can see a short-cut straight outside said someone in the party, and although a later inquiry couldn’t conclusively determine who had said it, next thing we were in the fire escape and heading down. To a door at the bottom which said the fire alarm would go off it were opened. So back up we went, but all the doors were locked, and the only way out was by setting off the fire alarm. Or calling the front desk and waiting to be let out by a bloke who really didn’t appreciate how funny we were trying
to make the situation seem. A learning from that first night in Cairns, besides don’t try to leave the hotel by the fire escape, was that everything along the marina had to be booked in advance. We tried to get into several places without success, before finally convincing someone at ‘All About Tha Fish’ that we could get through three courses with wines in 15 minutes if they convoyed it to the table bumper-to-bumper.
Cindy trapped in the Shangri-La Hotel fire escape using her on-line will app to delete a beneficiary
Up quite early and breakfasted, we wandered into town to the K-Mart to buy some motorcycle clothing to complement the thongs and shorts. Nothing by Klim or Touratech or BMW Motorrad was available in K-Mart Cairns, so a $20 outlay was made to get pants and tops with the highest breathability rating but the lowest possible water, abrasion and impact resistance rating, perfect for wearing on a scooter in Bangkok, but at least mine was hi-vis. Kitted out for later on, we hit the marina and the NQ Watersports facility for the jet-ski experience.
Who cares about societal norms, I’m on a jet-ski!
Our only previous exposure to jet-skis had been us glaring and making frowny faces toward tattoo-ed Bogans as they raced back and forth just outside the injured turtle rehabilitation area in some ecologically delicate place. So a couple of complete novices filled in the safety induction paperwork and the documentation to waive NQ Watersport’s liability if we didn’t act like total sociopathic idiots out on the water. The jet-skis were fitted with lots of safety gear, including a proximity sensor that would hopefully notice we getting too close to that really expensive yacht and shut the engine down. Out on the water, the jet-skis behaved just like really small fast boats which is not entirely unexpected as they are really small fast boats. We just missed a large crocodile which wasn’t on a jet-ski, before doing some Boganza stunts on the way back due to instant over-confidence. Out of the aquatic attire and into the K-Mart Moto ensemble, we trudged the 1.2 km back into town to the Cairns Scooter and Bicycle Hire and were introduced to the only two steeds in the stable; a Honda Shadow 750 VT and a Suzuki Intruder 250 VL. According to their website; the 250 VL has the pulsing rhythm of a thumping V-twin. It’s the sound of performance and no 250 plays it like this Intruder. An escapist with performance hunger, this cruiser’s threevalve-per-cylinder V-twin, with advanced gearshift technology, delivers the grunt every rider thrives on. Advanced gearshift technology turned out to be synchronising movement of one’s left foot and left hand while backing off with one’s right hand like on every other motorcycle built since about 1930, but big tick to the Suzuki advertising people for making stuff up. Unusually, the hire shop rules dictated that we must be able to demonstrate some ability to ride their motorcycles, so a slow speed wobbly lap or two of the fortunately empty carpark out the front was undertaken to demonstrate our limited cruiser skills. With our supplied open face helmets firmly fastened we headed north.
But it hasn’t got footpegs! Oh hang on, they’re way out the front!
The road to Port Douglas starts with a bit of teaser past the airport before the motorist becomes bogged in urban tedium: lights, roundabouts, roadworks. Up to full noise and delivering the grunt every rider thrives on was a state the Shadow and the Intruder could only dream of, until past Palm Cove when it became reality. Our limited cruiser skills didn’t impede us, the Shadow and
NOVEMBER 2020 the Intruder handled well on the scenery overload Captain Cook Highway in the beautiful weather. The traffic was light, the seats were comfortable, all was right with the world.
Dressed for Far North QLD cruising success
In a disappointingly short space of time we reached the outskirts of Port Douglas, which seem to go on for a lot further than the population of 3,500 should require. We’d heard rumours of the possible presence of BMWMCQ ‘Rona Refugees Mario and Fiona in Port Douglas, with a quick phone call confirming both their presence and their availability for lunch. Van people are subject to every form of discrimination in society – antivanners, vanists, and the Ku Klux Van are out to get them - yet still they are always proudly front and centre with their small dogs. Mario and Fiona boldly and unashamedly described their van activities including walks through the hinterland, sipping a quiet Chardonnay, and having an antipasto platter assembled from market fresh ingredients. Truly great fun and we were very fortunate to have them contribute at an appropriate social distance to our anniversarial memories. Back on and cruisin’ south, the pace picked up and the ride could be truly appreciated due to the mounting familiarity with the machines. Firstly, cruiser seats are basically a couch. Wearing a track suit with dodgy waist elastic and a stained hoodie would feel fine on a cruiser, especially as the feet are already up in the reclined position like you are watching your big screen TV with a huge bowl of Cheezels to hand. Secondly, a big surprise is the handling; the expectation was that a cruiser would handle like a Reliant Robin half full of mercury, but in fact the Shadow was on rails around the tight corners and a pleasure to ride. If I was asked to promote a mode of transport, the Honda Shadow would definitely rank well above the Costa Concordia, the Reliant Robin, and camels.
No surf, but no box jellyfish yet either
Back to Cairns via the sweaty suburban tedium and into the Scooter and Bicycle Hire premises without a single navigational disaster, our appetite for riding up in FNQ has been in no way satisfied. An official anniversary dinner rounded out the busy day, and on the Sunday we completed the last of the big two-five activities schedule with a rough boat ride out to the reef for some snorkeling action, fortunately survived without boarding the Porcelain Princess.
Perhaps next year a ride up from home is on the cards to really explore the northern regions of Queensland. Just not on cruisers though.
Big thumbs up all round for the first 25 years
FisH & CHip ridE 2020
Hosted by Duncan & Cindy Bennett
Join us for the annual Fish & Chip Ride to Morgans Seafood, Scarborough
Meeting Point:
2:30pm for a 3:00pm departure at Ferny Grove, in Cassimaty Park - opposite BP service Station on Samford Road.
Route:
This will be a led ride (ride leader and tail end Charlene) through the hills, dams and interesting back roads of the area.
Dinner:
Arriving just before 6:00pm to Morgans Seafoods in Scarborough where “your meal is almost caught and cooked before your eyes”! We will order from the extensive takeaway meny and ”Dine waterside in our attractive outside dining area - set in tropical gardens with shelters, umbrellas, tables & chairs so you and your guests can dine in comfort with the backdrop of a dozen or so trawlers, luxury yachts, comical pelicans, fidgety seagulls and our fishing folk.”
RSVP:
Either indicate “GOING” on the Facebook event page (not MAYBE as you won’t be counted) or send an email to editor@bmwmcq.org.au stating how may are attending.
NOTE: This is very important for the venues COVID plan. Those who have not
