Excerpt from The Last Adventure of Constance Verity A conversation between Constance “Connie” Verity and her friend Tia, who is hoping to be her sidekick on her last adventure. Connie begins: “The only way to find out is to track down my godmother and see what happens.” “Fine, but I’m coming with you, then.” “No way. It’s too dangerous.” “We are talking about a fairy godmother here,” said Tia. “What’s she going to do? Run me over with a pumpkin carriage? Smother me in an avalanche of ball gowns?” “You’re thinking of fairies from Disney movies. Real fae are dangerous and unpredictable.” “That’s exactly why you should have backup.” “You’d be a liability,” said Connie. “Even better. Didn’t you once tell me that the mark of a good sidekick is being undertrained and overenthusiastic?” “You’re telling me you want to be a sidekick?” “No, I want to be your sidekick. You’re the Constance Verity. You do all kinds of awesome stuff every day. I want in on some of that. I’ve lived a perfectly ordinary life up to this point, aside from those moments when I’ve been dragged into your exploits. What’s it gotten me? A dull job, a divorce, and a house I’ve spent too many years decorating and redecorating. I was just talking to my mom about experimenting with a neoAsian/postmodernist Russian fusion motif.” Tia shuddered. “Dear God, what has my life become? You’ve saved me from space aliens and gangsters. You can at least save me from shopping for tapestries. “And before you tell me no, I’ll just come along anyway, following stubbornly behind until you have no choice but to bring me with you.” “You would, wouldn’t you?” Connie laughed. “Okay, you’re in, but I take no responsibility for whatever happens.” “What’s going to happen? I’ll be beside Constance Verity, probably the safest place in the whole goddamn universe to be.” “Oh, why did you have to say that? You just jinxed it.”
“I didn’t think you believed in jinxes,” said Tia. Connie didn’t. But she wasn’t so sure that jinxes didn’t believe in her, and they’d had a long, long time to build a grudge.