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MAR | APR 2019

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Weddings

Unique nuptials for LGBTQ couples

Corporate Diversity Better business with inclusion

On the Waterfront Boston Harbor CEO Kathy Abbott

Gender-Bending Fashionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; MFA showcases nonbinary style

Impresario Remembering Chris Harris

MAY

2 2019

LGBT Executive Networking Night WITH KEYNOTE SPEAKER

Congressman David Cicilline PAGE 44

ANSEL ADAMS ALBERT BIERSTADT WINSLOW HOMER DOROTHEA LANGE GEORGIA O’KEEFFE ROBERT RAUSCHENBERG KAY WALKINGSTICK FRANK LLOYD WRIGHT ANDREW WYETH FEBRUARY 2–MAY 5, 2019

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Nature’s Nation: American Art and Environment has been organized by the Princeton University Art Museum. Leadership support has been provided by Shelly and Tony Malkin; Annette Merle-Smith; Henry Luce Foundation; and the National Endowment for the Arts. Carolyn and Peter S. Lynch and The Lynch Foundation, The Andrew W. Mellon Foundation, Jennifer and Andrew Borggaard and Kate and Ford O’Neil provided generous support. We also recognize the generosity of the East India Marine Associates of the Peabody Essex Museum. 161 Essex Street | Salem, Mass. pem.org

Alexandre Hogue, Crucified Land (detail), 1939. Oil on canvas. Gift of Thomas Gilcrease Foundation, 1955 Gilcrease Museum, Tulsa, Oklahoma. © Estate of Alexandre Hogue.

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publisher@bostonspiritmagazine.com

From The Publisher With spring inching closer and closer (hopefully), there is no question Love is in the Air. Add in the fact that all of us at Boston Spirit are hopeless romantics, and what do you get? Boston Spirit’s Wedding issue. It’s been a few years since we’ve dipped our toes into the world of weddings and it’s great to be back. We are very happy to bring you our 2019 Wedding issue complete with great stories, lots of great LGBT-friendly business partners and more. Need a beautiful ring? A once in a lifetime venue? We’ve got you covered. Speaking of spring, that also means that Boston Spirit’s annual LGBT Executive Networking Night is back. Over the years this event has grown to be the largest of its kind in New England with more than 1,000 attendees each year to go along with approximately 50 companies exhibiting. This is THE PLACE to network, look for a new job, take part in one of our professional development sessions and hear our featured speaker. We could not be more excited about our speaker this year. You might have heard that protections and advancements for the LGBT community are under attack by the federal government. Our speaker this year is fighting back…and fighting back strong. Rhode Island Congressman David Cicilline is the most senior gay member of Congress and a co-chair of the Congressional LGBT Caucus. Congressman Cicilline has been a remarkable leader for the community and a longtime champion of LGBT equality, and you will want to hear what he has to say. Boston Spirit’s 2019 LGBT Executive Networking Night with Congressman Cicilline will take place on Thursday, May 2, at the Boston Marriott Copley Place. Details on the event and RSVP information can be found on page 44. We look forward to seeing you there. In the meantime, we’ve got the Fenway Health Men’s Event and Women’s Dinner Party, Dinnerfest to support Victory Programs, the Beacons of Light event by MassEquality and Taste of the South End by AIDS Action. We look forward to seeing you at all of these great events.

David Zimmerman Publisher

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Boston Spirit Magazine supporters Age Management Center American Heart Association Artefact Beauport Hospitality Brian Gerhardson–Ameriprise Cambridge Savings Bank Celebrity Series Classic Harbor Lines Club Café Comcast DeScenza Diamonds Discover Central MA Discover Newport DJ Mocha Dover Rug East Boston Savings Bank Eastern Bank Echelon Seaport Equinox Resort Fenway Health Foxwoods Resort Casino Frank Webb Home Gardner Mattress Giblees Menswear Johnny Appleseed Trail Association Lark Hotel Group Long’s Jewelers Lucia Lighting Marriott Copley Place Mistral Mitchell Gold & Bob Williams Mountain View Grand resort Museum of Fine Arts Museum of Science Nantucket Chamber of Commerce New Bedford Tourism Partners Healthcare Peabody Essex Museum Provincetown Tourism Robert Paul Real estate Rockland Trust Seasons Four Takeda Pharmaceutical The Inn on Peaks Island The Verve - Natick Tufts Health Plan Victory Programs World Pride

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As We Go To Press Do you know what publicly traded U.S. company, in 1991, became the first to officially recognize same-sex couples by offering its gay and lesbian employees domestic partner benefits (like health and dental insurance) that mimicked those provided to married straight people? Here’s a couple hints: it was based in Cambridge, Massachusetts, and it was eventually bought by IBM. The answer? Lotus Development Corporation. Thirty years ago, Lotus was one of the largest software companies in the world. Those of a certain age will remember Lotus Notes and Lotus 1-2-3, the most widely used spreadsheet software application before Excel. It’s been almost three decades since Lotus and the rest of corporate America began taking the lead on LGBT rights. Today, thanks in large part to the thousands of companies that followed Lotus’s lead throughout the 1990s and into the 2000s, LGBT rights have a strong foothold in the entire American landscape—from

Contribute your opinion: editor@bostonspiritmagazine.com

4 | BOSTON SPIRIT

sea to shining sea. And marriage equality is the law of the land. Yes, many of our basic rights as LGBT people are under threat. And in some states, some rights have yet to take hold. But overall, it’s been a pretty good run for the past few decades. It’s also important to recognize that even as we are witnessing a backlash against these rights on the political front, corporations are more dedicated than ever to including and celebrating their LGBT coworkers. Rob Phelps’ informative story on “The Changing Nature of Corporate Diversity” demonstrates just how solid business support is for diversity and inclusion, including for LGBT people. Consider Boston-based law firm Seyfarth Shaw, where “at least one diverse candidate is interviewed for each associate opening,” according to one of the firm’s partners, Kate Perrelli. Consider too, Boston-based global software and services technology company PTC, which trains “100 percent” of its

managers on diversity. You can’t do more than one hundred percent. In a moment when so many LGBT civil rights feel endangered by politically shifting winds, it’s helpful to remember that legislative and judicial methods are only one way to secure equality and dignity. Corporate America, sometimes quietly, sometimes boldly, often leads the way on LGBT rights. Read Phelps’ fascinating article for more on this developing area of LGBT activism. Even while we lose political ground, corporations are forging into new territory for their LGBT employees. Politicians listen to money. Money talks. They listened before and they will listen again. Keep talking, corporate America. Keep talking.

James Lopata Editor

WEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;RE INTRODUCING SOMETHING A LITTLE DIFFERENT THIS SEASON.

les petite seats

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Cultural Nourishment

Contents MAR | APR 2019 | VOLUME 15 | ISSUE 2

Hit List Cultural Nourishment Ace Distiller Theater Inclusive Safe Space to Celebrate Senior Spirit Jamaica Plain project sets older LGBTQ life experiences to music From the Blogs Newsmakers | Rhode Island Newsmakers | New Hampshire Newsmakers | Connecticut Newsmakers | Vermont Newsmakers | Maine

Feature

The Dream, the Drive, the Desire

Play Ball!

Coming Home

Bright Light

18 20 22 24 28 30 32

Seth Hyde reflects on 40 years of Beantown Softball League Remembering night life impresario and community leader Chris Harris

Seasonal

Love Equals Love

Uniquely Yours Truly

What makes a wedding day a truly special Day? Only each couple can say. No two couples are the same—and no wedding should feel like a cookie-cutter experience.

Culture

A Second Skin

Major MFA show “Gender Bending Fashion” focuses on nonbinary style

Setting the Great Gay Poet to Music 76

The Changing Nature of Corporate Diversity

How New England-based companies are leading the way with more inclusive policies and practices

8 10 12 14 16 18

Love Equals Love

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The Changing Nature of Corporate Diversity

On the Waterfront

How Boston Harbor CEO Kathy Abbott strikes a delicate balance between environment with economics

Spotlight

Ace Distiller

Jazz legend Fred Hersch performs ‘Leaves of Grass’ in concert

Creating Art and Creating History Wicked Queer, Boston’s LGBT Film Festival, turns 35

A Second Skin

Boston Ballet dancer Paulo Arrais is ready to embrace new challenges

Boston roots run deep for classical superstars Kirill Gerstein and Thomas Adès

Calendar

New England Events

Boston Celtics Pride Night HRC New England Gala First Event Conference Transgender Jobs Fair Founding Members Meeting Mass. LGBTQ Bar Association Winter Party

89 90 92 93 94

Tough, But No Sob Story

Scene

Coda

Fashion icon Isaac Mizrahi recounts life story in pages and on stage

Tough, But No Sob Story

A C E N T U RY OF STY L E T H AT DA R E S TO B R E A K THE RULES

March 21â&#x20AC;&#x201C;August 25 Generously supported by the Carl and Ruth Shapiro Family Foundation, the Fashion Council, and the Coby Foundation. Additional support provided by the Museum Council Special Exhibition Fund.

Media sponsor is

Alessandro Trincone, Annodami (detail), January 2016. Photographer: Gioconda & August. Model: Andrea Antonelli.

SPOTLIGHT Trending STORY Scott Kearnan

Hit List NEWS, NOTES AND TO-DOS FOR EVERY GAY AGENDA

David Burke FACEBOOK

LOG ON to OutInMaine.com, William Forsythe’s “Pas/Parts” PHOTO Sabi Varga

CAST A STYLISH SPELL on your house.

“HausMagick: Transform Your Home with Witchcraft” is a brand-new book by Erica Feldman, the lesbian owner of HausWitch Home + Healing, a bewitching boutique in Salem, Massachusetts. In “HausMagick,” Feldman offers a “magical instruction manual” for creating a beautiful and harmonious living space using principles derived from astrology, tarot, and other true tools of the craft. Save the broomsticks for spring cleaning. More: hauswitchstore.com

SHAKE YOUR POM-POMS and give a cheer for Steve Harrington, the inaugural honoree of the Boston Celtics’ Pride Night. The team recently reserved about 200 seats for LGBTQ fans at the first annual event, and celebrated Harrington from center court. The executive director of the North Shore Alliance of GLBTQ Youth, Harrington has competed in every Gay Games since the 1982 inception of the series, and has won multiple gold medals for basketball. For more on NAGLY: nagly.org

APPLAUD a stunning pas de deux. In

February, Charles Carignan and Michael Cerruti became the first gay couple to co-chair Boston Ballet’s Ball, an annual black-tie benefit for one of the country’s most esteemed professional dance companies. At press time, the ball was expected to raise over $1.5 million at a soiree celebrating William Forsythe, the influential choreographer whose work is explored in “Full on Forsythe,” a Boston Ballet program presented from March 7 through March 17. More: bostonballet.org

Steve Harrington

a new website founded by Calais, Maine native David Burke. Burke, a gay army veteran, recently launched the site to help LGBTQ folks find social events, supportive businesses, inclusive churches and other resources in the Pine Tree State. The idea was a response to his own experiences growing up gay in his rural hometown, Burke told “Bangor Daily News.” His goal is “to bring the resources to the community and the community together.” More: outinmaine.com

BRUSH UP ON YOUR KNOWLEDGE of queer

local history by reading “The Hub of the Gay Universe: An LGBTQ History of Boston, Provincetown and Beyond,” a new book by author Russ Lopez. Available in April, the tome chronicles a fascinating history — from the anti-sodomy laws of colonial Massachusetts to the Bay State’s role in equal marriage, from legacy of Provincetown as a queer haven to the

PUBLISHER David Zimmerman EDITOR IN CHIEF James Lopata MANAGING EDITOR Robert Phelps [rob@bostonspiritmagazine.com] ART DIRECTOR Dean Burchell CONTRIBUTING LIFESTYLE EDITOR Scott Kearnan [lifestyle@bostonspiritmagazine.com] CONTRIBUTING ARTS EDITOR Loren King CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Alyssa Gillin, Tom Joyce, Nina Livingstone , Natalie Nonken, Kim Harris Stowell CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Joel Benjamin COVER PHOTO Greg Gorman ON THE WEB [bostonspiritmagazine.com] TALK TO US [feedback@bostonspiritmagazine.com] EDITORIAL CONTACT [editor@bostonspiritmagazine.com] PUBLISHING AND SALES CONTACT [publisher@bostonspiritmagazine.com or 781-223-8538] THE FINE PRINT Boston Spirit magazine. A Division of Jake Publishing, LLC Published by Jake Publishing, LLC. Copyright 2004 by Jake Publishing, LLC. All

MAR | APR 2019 | VOLUME 15 | ISSUE 2

rights reserved. No part of this periodical may be reproduced without the written permission of Boston Spirit magazine. Neither the publishers nor the advertisers will be held responsible for any errors found in the magazine. The publishers accept no liability for the accuracy of statements made by advertisers. Publication of the name or photograph of any person, organization or business in this magazine does not reflect upon one’s sexual orientation in any way. Boston Spirit Magazine, 398 Columbus Ave. #395, Boston, MA 02116

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ZAFA Wines founding of the transgender institution the Tiffany Club. More: russlopez.com

UNCORK A BOTTLE of ZAFA Wines, a Vermont-based label from Krista Scruggs, who is making major waves in the natural wine world – and, as a queer woman of color, bringing much-needed representation to her industry. Scruggs is making name with grapes from her biodynamic farm, totally free of pesticides, herbicides and other unnatural agents. Green Mountain State oenophiles can find her at CO Cellars, a Burlington tasting room shared with popular Shacksbury Cider. More: zafawines.com

ADVANCE THE FIGHT for LGBTQ

rights by joining GLAD Forward, a social group for young LGBTQ people and allies interested in supporting the work of GLBTQ Legal Advocates & Defenders, one of the country’s most vital organizations of its kind. Scope the scene at its “Drinking Progressively” event coming to gay-owned Dorchester Brewing Company in Boston on Thursday, April 4. The $30 ticket includes dinner, games, and a chance to sip suds with fellow philanthropists. More: glad.org/forward [x]

Dorchester Brewing Company

SPOTLIGHT Nightlife STORY Scott Kearnan

Oompa. PHOTO Leonardo Claudio

Cultural Nourishment BOSTONIAN POET, RAPPER AND HIPHOP ARTIST OOMPA RELEASES ‘POOR KID PEDAGOGY (HUNGER)’ Oompa knows what it’s like to be hungry. With her next album, she aims to nourish others. The Boston-born poet, rapper and hiphop artist was one of 24 musicians who recently received Iguana Music Fund grants from Passim, a Cambridge, Massachusetts nonprofit that works to foster the development of dynamic New England performers. Oompa is using her grant to support the creation of her next album, “Poor Kid Pedagogy (Hunger)”, and will be showcased alongside other recipients at Harvard Square’s Club Passim on Monday, April 8. This latest record isn’t just an anticipated release from a rising music star. It’s an opportunity for Oompa to share her own experience of physical and emotional survival—and thereby show solidarity with others who have experienced marginalization because of intersecting identities related to sex, race, and class. “It’s about how poor people learn to belong to each other: what family means, what friendship means, what rivalry means as a poor person,” says Oompa,

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a queer, black, masculine-presenting woman. “And it explores some of those other identities. I’m interested in seeing what people consider respectable and safe. I’m experimenting with whether or not people’s perceptions will change based on what they learn about me.” For Oompa, the “hunger” referenced in her album title has taken several forms. She has known it literally: before she received her nickname, Lakiyra Williams grew up poor in Roxbury, raised by an adoptive mother whose death left her homeless for a period. But she has also known a different kind of hunger: the longing for community that comes with feeling othered, starting at a young age. “I didn’t have examples of queer people in my life whose lives weren’t constantly questioned or endangered,” says Oompa, who came out as a teenager. In a hip-hop world “dominated by straight, cis men,” she says she still has to work harder than others to prove herself—and counter assumptions that her art will only be relatable to other queers.

“There’s only one song in my discography that talks directly about my queer experience,” says Oompa, referring to the track “Your Girl.” And yet, some still pigeonhole her work. “It’s funny that people see you and have this understanding of who you are, without ever pressing play.” If they do, they’ll find an artist with plenty to say on many subjects. Oompa first honed much of her craft in slam poetry performances and open mic nights, and since those days, she’s built striking success. She was the 2017 Women of the World Poetry Slam champion, and was nominated for New Artist of the Year at the 2017 Boston Music Awards, among other accolades. Her debut album, “November 3rd,” received raves. “Poor Kid Pedagogy (Hunger)” seems poised for similar praise. Oompa plans to get candid and confessional on tracks like “Joy Back,” about her journey to retake her happiness from the grip of depression. More generally, the album focuses on the relationship between hunger and choice, says Oompa. “What is choice, really, when hunger is an issue?” she asks. “What choices are yours to make, and what are the results of just trying to survive?” By sharing her own struggles, Oompa hopes to carve space for communities that are too often sidelined, particularly “poor, black and brown, and queer kids” that are “left outside of respectability politics.” “The world is a really isolating place at times,” explains Oompa, who worked as a middle school teacher before diving full-time into her music career. “As poor kids, as ‘hood kids, with the intersection of race and class, there are ways that young people are isolated from what feels like the rest of the city, and the rest of the world.” And yet, from that isolation, something much bigger can be born. “You have a unique way of looking at the world and being resourceful,” says Oompa. “When you don’t have, you have to use what you’ve got to get what you need. I think a certain language is born in that.” “When you speak a certain language with another person, it becomes a connection. And if you have a bunch of people who speak that language, it becomes a community.” Speak on it. [x]

oompoutloud.com, passim.org.

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SPOTLIGHT Cocktails STORY Scott Kearnan Privateer Rum CEO Maggie Campbell opportunity in my field, that means everyone with a natural inclination, passion and excitement will be there. And that makes for better distillers.” She’s become one of the best, ever since the then-philosophy student visited a Scotch distillery when she was 20, setting in motion a series of spirits-related mentorships and studies that have led her to her current role at Privateer, where she is consistently raising the bar on expectations. The fast-rising star is also vice-president of the American Craft Spirits Association. Campbell is proud to provide representation of the LGTBQ community on the national scene, and to inspire other queer folks to pursue their goals in the industry. After all, coming out wasn’t easy for her; she no longer speaks to her biological mother. She also uses the power of her platform to make a difference. For instance, Privateer’s rainbow flag-boasting “Pride Label” rum is available year-round, not just in June, and a portion of proceeds benefits LGBTQrelated organizations like Fenway Health, the Boston Alliance of LGBTQ+ Youth (BAGLY), and Boston GLASS (Gay & Lesbian Adolescent Social Services). “In the earlier parts of my career, it wasn’t something I talked about a lot,” says Campbell of her place in the LGBTQ community. “I had negative forces in my life trying to make me smaller than who I was.” “Now it’s a huge part of what I do, how I see things, and how interact with life and the people around me.”

Ace Distiller

We’ll drink to that. [x]

PRIVATEER RUM CEO MAGGIE CAMPBELL SETS THE BAR HIGH Massachusetts has a rich, centuries-old history in rum distilling. But Maggie Campbell represents its bright future. “Boston is a city that embraces powerful, queer professional women in food and drink,” says Campbell, the out, bisexual president of Ipswich-based Privateer Rum, a nationally lauded craft spirits maker. Colorado-born and California-bred, Campbell faced challenges ascending the ladder of her male-dominated industry—and still deals with issues like bi-erasure today. But she has become a hugely respected leader in her field, and has ushered Privateer’s unfiltered, unsweetened, unadulterated varieties of rum to award-winning status. One trade publication even called her “the unsung savior of American rum.” It feels poignant that she’s accomplishing it all while helming production for a

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brand founded by the direct descendant of Andrew Cabot, a colonial-era distiller and privateer during the American Revolution. After all, powdered wig-wearing forefathers probably didn’t anticipate a self-identifying “soft butch” bisexual woman would wind up such an important, influential figure in the premium spirits industry. But Privateer recognized her unassailable expertise and opened a door to leadership when distillers elsewhere would not. The Boston area, she says, has been a bright spot in a business that is slowly evolving. “When I first started in the industry, I can’t think of one LGBTQ-Ace distiller I knew,” says Campbell. Now, she’s increasingly meeting more non-binary, trans, and other LGBTQ folks in the spirits world. Privateer has a number of queer employees. “That means we’re getting the best talent,” says Campbell. “If everyone is seeing an

RUM BOULEVARDIER “I love this drink because I can make it in 30 seconds flat and it comes off as classy,” says Campbell. “People can assume it is sweet from the ingredients, but the key is the balancing bitter ingredients the Campari and Vermouth bring.”

11/4 oz Privateer True American Amber Rum 1oz Campari 1oz Sweet Vermouth Mix all ingredients over a large ice cube. Stir. Garnish with orange twist if desired.

PERFECT STORMY “For something fresh,” says Campbell.

2oz Privateer Silver Reserve Rum 4-6 oz ginger beer 1-2 dashes Angostura bitters Combine rum, bitters and ginger beer in a glass. Fill with ice. Garnish with a lime wedge.

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SPOTLIGHT Theater STORY Scott Kearnan

Theater Inclusive

BOSTON’S THEATER OFFENSIVE CELEBRATES 30 COMMUNITYEMBRACING YEARS

Thirty years after the curtain went up on one of Boston’s most vital theater organizations, the now-nationally lauded nonprofit is refreshing its act. “I feel like a participant. I’m doing the Theater Offensive, I’m not leading the Theater Offensive,” says Abe Rybeck, who founded the LGBTQ-focused outfit in 1989. Since then, the pioneering queer arts group—known for its edge, intellect and adventurousness—has evolved into a national model for organizations of its kind. In 2016, Theater Offensive’s 1994-founded True Colors: Out Youth Theater program, even became the first LGBTQ arts group to receive a National Arts & Humanities Youth Program Award from the White House. Along the way, Rybeck, easily recognized on the arts-world social scene for his trademark chandelier earrings, has become synonymous with Theater Offensive, seen as its mascot as much as its founder.

We have no reason to doubt that. For three decades, the Theater Offensive has stayed vital and relevant precisely because of its ability to adapt and evolve—something made clear with a glance through the photos that were displayed in a retrospective exhibit at Boston City Hall in January. It was the kickoff to a year full of 30thanniversary events and surprises, promises the team. Next up, Theater Offensive will present “Alleged Lesbian Activities” with Last Call, a New Orleans-based, multiracial collective of queer artists who focus on neglected areas of queer history. “Alleged,” described as a “denim-clad, glitter-crusted, powerballed eulogy for the American dyke bar,” will be staged at Jacques Cabaret April 4–7.

He trusts them implicitly.

The organization’s ability to pivot in its approach is nothing new. Rybeck launched it as an offshoot of United Fruit Company, a gay men’s guerilla theatre troupe that celebrated and magnified the fringes of queer art and activism. In 2009, Rybeck recognized a uniquely unmet need within the queer arts and introduced a new programming philosophy: Out in Your Neighborhood, or OUT’hood, which centers voices from communities of color, transgender folks, and other LGBTQ identities underrepresented by other arts initiatives.

“I trust them to create a new Theater Offensive that can do things I couldn’t even imagine,” says Rybeck.

As it enters its fourth decade, the Theater Offensive will deepen its commitment to representing voices and issues reflective of

“The brand of the Theater Offensive is so closely tied to Abe personally,” admits Evelyn Francis, interim artistic director. Though Rybeck still serves as founding director, he says he’s really handed the reins to Francis and Harold Steward, Theater Offensive’s interim executive director.

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the most marginalized within the LGBTQ community. “The Theater Offensive has always been a responsive organization,” says Steward. From mobilizing around the AIDS crisis to fighting on multiple social justice fronts, the group is like the “first responders” of arts orgs, he says, rushing to where the need is. Right now, that means supporting communities weighed down by multiple oppressions against the backdrop of a city in major gentrification mode. To succeed, Theater Offensive will need supporters to accept a change in how its leadership looks. “One of the biggest challenges we face is the racism and transphobia in the queer community,” says Francis. “If you look at who leads theater companies across the country, the vast majority are white, cisgender men.” She believes Theater Offensive supporters will stand by the organization’s important work, no matter where it focuses its spotlight. After all, its ever-evolving mission is actually a form of consistency: for thirty years, the Theater Offensive has offered others a platform — through the stage. “We have such a strong foundation in the community that understands the importance of the Theater Offensive,” she says. “People will take this journey with us.” [x]

thetheateroffensive.org

N AT I C K

B O STO N

B U R L I N G TO N

800.368.3778

W W W. D OV E R R U G . C O M MAR | APR 2019 | 15

SPOTLIGHT Community STORY Scott Kearnan

Safe Space to Celebrate AIRSPRAY WORCESTER ELEVATES EXPRESSION, IDENTITY AND EQUALITY New Englanders are lucky to live in one of the most progressive corners of the country, at least as it relates to LGBTQ issues. Still, the need for inclusive spaces remains. Just ask Philippe Berry. It wasn’t easy for them to grow up as a queer, nonbinary person in a conservative Christian family in Worcester, Massachusetts. Berry is 24, but didn’t know a gay person until high school, and didn’t come out until college—which may surprise folks who think that all young LGBTQ people have it easy today. But now that Berry feels able to express themselves fully, they want to build a community in the central part of the Bay State that helps other queers connect and celebrate every aspect of their identity. Berry is the director of Airspray, a twicemonthly dance party that brings together every stripe of the vibrant LGBTQ community. Airspray events are held on the first and third Fridays of the month, typically at Electric Haze, a hip bar and live music venue in Worcester. They draw a spirited, progressive crowd that gathers for glitterfilled nights of great music, good vibes and a chance to write new chapters in queer culture, even in an era when gay bars and other LGBTQ-specific gatherings spots are much fewer and far between. “I wish there had been something like this when I was a kid,” says Berry. “It would have opened my eyes to the way the world can be.” The Airspray series was originally founded by Heather Mangione, a Brooklyn native who wanted to fill the void of queer nightlife she discovered after moving to Worcester for grad school. (And yes, the name is a fun reference to John Waters’ “Hairspray.”) Though Worcester is Massachusetts’ second largest city, it only has one full-time gay bar: MB Lounge, previously known as the Male Box. Despite the renaming, you can imagine that the venue continues to attract a relatively specific subset of the larger LGBTQ community. Airspray aims to be even more inviting to folks across all sexual and gender identities. No surprise, then, that Airspray is hosting the after-party for “Queer AF: Art and Fashion,” a March 1 fashion show and fundraiser produced by Love Your Labels, a new Worcester-based organization with the mission to, “advocate and develop programs

16 | BOSTON SPIRIT

Airspray dance party for people fighting for acceptance and visibility and play an active role in elevating a dialogue around expression, identity, and equality.” “We want to break down stigmas, and the associations we have with who can wear what,” says Berry, who is vice-president of Love Your Labels. They work in a buttonedup academic institution, and know what it’s like to get strange looks when they show up to work in a dress. “Queer AF,” which will be held at Worcester’s historic Bull Mansion, will bring together national and regional designers — like Massachusetts native Sam Donovan, alum of “Project Runway All Stars” — to “showcase their art on models representing a broad intersection of identities.” Funds raised from “Queer AF” will be used to launch Love Your Labels’ new youth fashion program, Empowerment Through Expression, which will help young people learn how to conceptualize, sketch and create fashion designs that break down barriers and binaries, allowing allow them to express themselves honestly and authentically.

There will also be live performances from acts like “RuPaul’s Drag Race” contestant Joslyn Fox, a Worcester-based queen who, in “boy drag” as Patrick Allen, DJs many of Airspray’s parties. Allen will also spin at the “Queer AF” after-party, back at Electric Haze. Other recent Airspray events have included a 1990s-throwback soiree, and future themes include a Bacchus-channeling “Midsummer Night’s Dream” party in June. These are more than just excuses to hit the dance floor. LGBTQ bars and clubs have historically been spaces in which the community mobilizes politically and innovates culturally. They are still important, even today, and especially in cities where such venues are rare. “If we don’t have spaces to collect together around our common identities, common goals, and shared experiences, we aren’t going to be able to create even more culture,” says Berry. “Without them, we won’t be able to expand our outlooks.” [x]

facebook.com/airspray508

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SPOTLIGHT Community STORY Bob Linscott Ken Mendoza [LEFT] with Palaver Strings musicians Su Yin Chan and Lysander Jaffee. PHOTO courtesy Palaver Strings

Senior Spirit

Jamaica Plain project sets older LGBTQ life experiences to music Our current LGBTQ elders lived in a time that barely resembles the world today. For starters, homosexuality was against the law in all 50 states and there was no acceptance, protections or community supports. The stories from those who lived during this time are a vital part of LGBTQ history, but sadly, few have the resources or courage to write them down to be passed on to future generations. Thankfully there is one group in Massachusetts that is committed to bringing some of these stories to life and using them for social change. Palaver Strings is a musician-led orchestra currently based in Boston whose mission is to use music to address social issues, promote education and healing, and inspire peers and community to support the arts. When Palaver Strings comes to a new community to perform, they seek out the relevant social issues in that area and use them to inform their music and

18 | BOSTON SPIRIT

their community programs. In 2017, when the orchestra selected Jamaica Plain, Matthew Smith, 28, the co-artistic director and JP resident, proposed that Palaver Strings undertake a project that would engage with the LGBTQ community. In their search to find issues that were important they realized that one of the most overlooked groups within the LGBTQ community was their elders. Smith saw this as an opportunity to break some of the negative stereotypes about older LGBTQ people and create a forum for cross generational dialogue through music and social action. His co-artistic director Maya French and the rest of the orchestra were fully on board, and the LifeSongs project was born. After reaching out to The LGBT Aging Project and JP-based Ethos, the orchestra began to get the word out about the project to LGBTQ seniors in the area. Bostonian Ken Mendoza, 72, had a difficult time when he was coming out in the

1960s. He didn’t think he would ever be a part of a community or be accepted by his family or peers. When he heard about LifeSongs, he knew he had to participate, even though he wasn’t a singer or songwriter. After the first meeting when his team of orchestra members asked him about his life, he spoke about old journal entries he made in high school. He still had those journals, and he used those words to frame his song, which opens “I’d like to know if a man can love another man/ And if that so-called unnatural love is really so unnatural.” This is the process that Palaver uses with each season of the LifeSongs project. They select three to five LGBTQ older adults each year and assign each participant to a team of three musicians and a lyricist. In the first two meetings the senior talks about his or her life including the challenges, celebrations and lessons they learned over the years. These sessions form the framework for the song that is created, and Matt Brady, Palaver’s resident lyricist, supports the team to turn these stories into a song that captures the essence of that person’s life. The lyrics are then set to music, orchestrated, rehearsed and performed during one of Palaver’s public concerts. That first year of LifeSongs featured three songwriters. Palaver also collaborated with a handful of singers from The Boston Gay Men’s Chorus who volunteered to shadow or sing with the songwriters to give them extra confidence. Now in its third year, the project is supported by grants from the Mass. Cultural Council and The Boston Foundation’s Equality Fund. Smith has been deeply touched by the range of themes that come out in the songs over the years as well as the diversity of LGBT elder songwriters who have joined the project. This year’s cast includes three African American older adults, an older lesbian social activist and a 93-year-old gay man who didn’t come out until his 80s. The experience working with the musicians in Palaver has been incredibly

powerful for each of the songwriters. Bradford Greer, one of the current participants wrote Smith and said “I hope you know that when you pick up your instruments, you open your hearts and unleash hope into the world”. Smith is pleased that Palaver has been able to literally and figuratively turn these stories into songs that define the heritage and diversity of this generation of LGBTQ elders. He adds that as a younger gay man it is critical for him and his peers to hear these stories about being happy, having rich friendships and relationships that last a lifetime. For the first time Palaver Strings will be doing three public performances with this year’s LifeSongs participants including Ken Mendoza’s song which has been translated into four-part choral harmony and will be performed with singers from The Boston Gay Men’s Chorus accompanying Mendoza. When Mendoza was asked what this experience with Palaver has mean to him he shared a story from last year’s Pride festival. “I was asked to perform my song at the 2018 Pride Lights festival and I was

LifeSongs production team and participants. PHOTO Bob Linscott on the stage and terrified, but I looked out in the audience and saw all the members of Palaver who were looking up at me with such love. I realized that I had found the support and community that I never imagined was possible when I was younger.” LifeSongs will be performed at The Boston Center for the Arts on March 8

at 2 & 7 PM and March 9 at 7 PM. For more, including song samples, visit www. palaverstrings.org. [x]

Bob Linscott is assistant director of the LGBT Aging Project at The Fenway Institute.

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SPOTLIGHT News STORY Rob Phelps

From the Blogs NEWS HIGHLIGHTS FROM BOSTONSPIRITMAGAZINE.COM to present the pre-game colors, an LGBT artist to sing the national anthem, the Green Team performing in Celtics Pride shirts, a big Pride flag circling the court numerous times, the TD Garden lit up in rainbow colors, Gay Games veteran hoopster Steve Harrington presented a “Heroes Among Us” award, Gay Basketball League team members doing post-game shootout, and courtside seats for Harrington and friends along with free T-shirts and discounts for LGBT attendees.

Boston Bruins David Pastrnak [LEFT] and Charlie McAvoy at Boston Celtics’ Pride Night. PHOTO Maddie

Allies in the crowd donned the Pride Night T-shirts too, including Boston Bruin David Pastrnak, who watched the game with his teammate Charile McAvoy and their dates.

Meyer/Getty Images, courtesy Boston Celtics

BOSTON CELTICS HOSTS FIRST LGBT PRIDE NIGHT

“What’s cool about this is how yawn-inducing it might appear,” reported Outsports on January 11.

At the Boston Celtics first annual LGBT Pride Night on January 9, the team celebrated in a big way, inviting Outvets

Explained the Outsports story, “Fifteen years ago, a male pro athlete would be leery of being seen wearing an LGBT pride shirt. We used to have pro athletes avoid even answering questions about having a gay teammate out of fear of being labeled, so things have definitely changed for the better. “ For more photos on the Boston Celtics Pride Night, go to page 89.

DELARIA TAKES OVER PIED BAR IN P’TOWN The super-talented TV, film and Broadway actor, singer and part-time Provincetown resident Lea DeLaria is taking over Provincetown’s super-storied Pied Bar. On Jan. 8, reports The Provincetown Banner, “the Provincetown Licensing Board approved the transfer of the common victualer and alcohol licenses to DeLaria’s company, which is called A Lea DeLaria Joint LLC. The bar will apparently be renamed ‘The Club.’”

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“There will be no change in any aspect of the operation,” DeLaria’s lawyer, John Connell, told the Banner. “We look forward to livening the space up and making a go of it.”

“Mutual of Omaha’s categorical exclusion of Truvada users from life and long-term care insurance was irrational and based on a gross misunderstanding of how HIV gets transmitted.”

Reports the Banner, “For decades, the waterfront property nestled in an alley at 193A Commercial St. has served as a social center for lesbian life. In the 1950s it was the Ace of Spades, in the 1970s it morphed into the Pied Piper and in the 1980s became today’s Pied Bar. What was once a hotspot has lately become more low-profile. But its new owner, actress, singer, comedian and “professional lesbian” Lea DeLaria, is anything but.”

“We’re incredibly grateful to GLBTQ Legal Advocates & Defenders and the Massachusetts Attorney General’s office for taking this on,” Mayer added.

MAJOR INSURANCE CO. MUST PROVIDE TRUVADA TO MA RESIDENTS Thanks to an investigation by Massachusetts Attorney General Maura Healey’s office, a separate lawsuit by GLBTQ Legal Advocates and Defenders (GLAD), and the assistance of Fenway Health, one of the largest insurance companies in the US, Mutual of Omaha, has agreed to stop denying both health and life insurance to Bay State residents using the HIV prevention

Lea Delaria medication Truvada, according to a recent press release from Fenway Health. Fenway Health assisted both the AG’s investigation and GLAD’s lawsuit by providing expert testimony and research by Dr. Kenneth H. Mayer, medical research director and cochair of The Fenway Institute. “Multiple studies have long shown that Truvada is an incredibly effective way to prevent the transmission of HIV and it is standard to offer it to gay men and others at high risk of infection,” Mayer said.

Said GLAD AIDS Law Project Director Ben Klein, “Ken has been working in this field since day one of the epidemic. His detailed and comprehensive knowledge of PrEP and HIV prevention, coupled with his ability to clearly and directly explain the science were instrumental in this process,” said Ben Klein. Moreover, in its announcement the Massachusetts Attorney General’s office stated that the company “revised its underwriting practices to ensure that it does not deny, rate, or otherwise take any adverse action against any Massachusetts resident who applies for any type of accident, life, sickness, or health insurance with Mutual of Omaha, including long-term care insurance, based on the applicant’s use of Truvada for PrEP.” [x]

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SPOTLIGHT News STORY Kim Harris Stowell

Newsmakers | Rhode Island This Just in from the Ocean State Since Marriage Equality passed in Rhode Island, both the House and the Senate have singled out those bills that appear to be related to solemnization for same sex couples, and passed them separately. For the LGBTQ community, a bill like Kazarian’s will end the practice of the General Assembly treating their marriages in a second-class fashion.

US Congressman David Cicilline

US HOUSE GUARANTEES LGBTQ STAFFERS ANTIBIAS PROTECTIONS The House of Representatives, which now has a record eight LGBTQ members, passed legislation last month that protects staffers from employment discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity.

A hearing was held in mid-February, at which local reporter Steve Ahlquist referred to the current system as “institutionalized bigotry.” Another witness found the practice degrading, and added “like any bride in the world, I just want my wedding to be perfect, not separate but equal, because separate is never really equal.” The bill has been held for further study.

Chris Harris

RIP CHRIS HARRIS

MORE EQUALITY FOR LGBTQ MARRIAGES Rhode Island State Representative Katherine Kazarian has introduced a bill that would eliminate the power of legislators to pass judgement on marriages they disapprove of. Kazarian’s bill will authorize the governor to designate a justice of the peace or any other person in each town or city to solemnize marriages. If passed, the bill will allow anyone to act as an officiant during a marriage after filling out a simple online form.

22 | BOSTON SPIRIT

“Hedwig and the Angry Inch”

When approaching a topic so potentially incendiary as gender identity, having people from different backgrounds and experiences in the room helps frame the resulting theatrical production in a broader, more fluid light.

The inclusion of nondiscrimination provisions was especially notable considering that federal law does not currently cover discrimination against LGBTQ people.

votkazarian63.com

“HEDWIG” A COLLABORATION AMONG

3 RI THEATER COMPANIES

Out gay Rhode Island Congressmember David Cicilline, fresh off his reelection victory in November, spearheaded the effort to include the new ruling.

RI State Rep. Katherine Kazarian. PHOTO courtesy

Donations in tribute to Harris can be made online to the ‘Chris Harris Tribute Fund at the National LGBT Cancer Network’ at ChrisHarrisTribute.org or by check mailed to Chris Harris Tribute Fund at the National LGBT Cancer Network, Hope Artiste Village, 1005 Main St. Suite 2137, Pawtucket, RI 02860. This fund will be used to establish a LGBTQ cancer prevention and education program in Rhode Island and beyond.

Rhode Island is mourning the loss, at age 51, of Chris Harris. Known affectionately as the “King of Clubs,” he was a constant in the New England LGBT community, offering them safe places to dance and be themselves. His characteristic greeting, “What’s up, Provi-DANCE!” was familiar to many who attended his legendary events. (See related story on page 42.) Last year, Harris was awarded the 2018 Pyramid of Pride Award for his lifetime of service to LGBTQ Rhode Islanders, and he has been named an honorary marshall in Rhode Island’s 2019 Pride Parade, which will take place on the evening of June 15 in downtown Providence. An ‘EPIC Celebration of Life’ event took place on January 15 at the Providence Biltmore Hotel, followed by a parade procession from the Biltmore to the after-party at Club EGO, where Harris was co-owner.

That was the case for the team that staged the rock musical “Hedwig and the Angry Inch” in January. A collaboration between Academy, Counter Productions and Epic theater companies, it was the reimagining of John Cameron Mitchell’s show, with Epic’s Artistic Director Kevin Broccoli playing Hedwig in the story of a botched sex change operation performed on an East German rock singer. A dream role for Broccoli, the show got good reviews from Broadway World, who wrote, “The production … is so satisfying to watch, and is an overwhelming spectacle of music with an incredibly talented cast.”

TONING DOWN THE GAY JOKES The fictional town of Quahog, Rhode Island is breathing easier, since “Family Guy” executive producers Rich Appel and Alec Sulkin have announced their intention to phase out gay jokes. Citing changes in climate, culture and their own personal views, the news will be comforting to Stewie Griffin (whose is voiced by RISD grad Seth McFarlane), the adult-like baby who was often the butt of gay jokes. [x]

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SPOTLIGHT News STORY Rob Phelps

Newsmakers | New Hampshire Headlines from the Granite State

truth and because I wanted to be the person I needed when I was younger,” Dignard said. “Being denied that opportunity put up absurd discriminatory barriers and created serious trauma in my life. No transgender service member should have to suffer through uncertainty about the acceptability of their identity or feel pushed out of their job for expressing who they are.” As New Hampshire’s first openly LGBTQ member of Congress and a co-chair of the Equality Caucus, Chris has spoken out against the ban and believes that transgender military service members and veterans are always welcome in the People’s House. A UCLA study from 2014 said there are more than 15,000 transgender Americans in active duty and 153,000 transgender veterans, noted the press release.

PAPPAS BRINGS TRANS NAVY VET AS STATE OF UNION GUEST

In Manchester, the senator vowed to fight for legal reforms to campaign finance, antidiscrimination, criminal justice, environmental and abortion rights, according to the New Hampshire Union Leader. “Every generation has tried to take on a mission to make this country stronger and better and that is why I am so angry at what President Trump has done putting hate into the dialogue of this country,” Gillibrand said. “He is dividing us, making us weaker and not stronger.” “Senator Gillibrand has spent her career fighting for equality—for LGBTQ people, for workers, for women and for families,” said Human Rights Campaign President Chad Griffin. “From fighting back against Donald Trump’s transgender military ban to pushing for LGBTQ nondiscrimination protections through the Equality Act, she fights for what’s right and she never backs down.”

At the State of the Union address on February 5, New Hampshire Congressman Chris Pappas brought Tavion Dignard, a transgender US Navy veteran, as his guest. Dignard, a transgender man, began serving in the Navy in 1998 and was honorably discharged in 2002. He is currently an undergraduate at the University of New Hampshire. President Trump’s transgender military service ban would prevent qualified people such as Dignard from serving our country, noted a Congressional press release from Pappas’s office. “President Trump’s transgender service ban weakens and politicizes our military despite the ridiculous claims of improving military cohesion,” said Pappas. “I’m so glad Tavion will be with me to tell his story, share his truth, and stand as a warmly welcomed guest of the United States House of Representatives. As lawmakers, it’s our job to hold the Trump Administration accountable for its discriminatory policies. Denying transgender Americans their right to serve this country is a disgrace. They deserve equal treatment by their government and the law,” Pappas said. “I thank Congressman Pappas for this unique opportunity to share my story and be a part of this incredible experience,” said Dignard. “I came out as a transgender man because I wanted to live my authentic

24 | BOSTON SPIRIT

‘SOLIDIFYING EQUALITY’ GILLIBRAND: LGBT RIGHTS ARE ‘PERSONAL FOR ME’ Factor in what you will about her role in deposing Minnesota Senator Al Franken, a powerful LGBT ally. But New York Senator Kirsten Gillibrand is also a provenly reliable ally of the LGBT community. And she’s been among the first 2020 presidential candidate to start stumping in the Granite State. In an early campaign stop in Manchester on February 2, Gillibrand voiced her support for LGBTQ rights, which, she said, are “personal for me,” noting gay family members as well as gay wedding ceremonies she had performed. Her track record in Congress has consistently earned her a perfect 100 percent on HRC’s Congressional Scorecard.

The most recent Human Rights Campaign annual State Equality Index (for 2018) gave a shout out to the Granite State for groundbreaking progress including the legislation’s passing and Governor Chris Sununu’s signing antidiscrimination protections for transgender individuals in employment, housing and pubic accommodations and protections for LGBTQ youth against conversion therapy. The Index rates all 50 states and DC on six areas of law—nondiscrimination, health and safety, hate crimes and criminal justice, youth, parenting, and religious refusal and relationship recognition. The Index then assigns each state to one of four distinct categories, placing New Hampshire in the second highest, Solidifying Equality. [x]

SPOTLIGHT News STORY Natalie Nonken

Newsmakers | Connecticut Articles from The Constitution State

Raghib Allie Brennan. FACEBOOK

BILLS TO BAN ‘GAY OR TRANS PANIC’ DEFENSE Lawmakers in both Connecticut’s senate and house proposed bills to ban the so-called “gay panic” defense. If passed, a defendant accused of committing a violent act would no longer be able to introduce a victim’s sexual orientation or gender identity as a defense. “A criminal defendant may not use the shock of learning that the victim of the defendant’s crime was gay or transgender to justify or excuse the violence perpetrated by the defendant against the victim,” reads the senate bill number 58. The bill was put forth by Senate President Pro Tempore Martin Looney. Over in the house, Reps Raghib Allie-Brennan of Bethel and Jeff Currey of East Hartford had introduced a similar bill (HB6306). Both bills have been referred to the judiciary committee. Along with Rhode Island’s recent passage of a similar law, Massachusetts Senator Ed Markey and Congressman Joe Kennedy III introduced similar national legislation in July last year. —RP

NEW HAVEN PRIDE CENTER HOSTS ANNUAL DOROTHY AWARDS On March 2, New Haven Pride Center will host its annual Dorothy Awards. The event is described as one “designed to recapture the excitement of the formal events of years gone by.” It is the New Haven

TCC Dorothy Awards

Pride Center’s biggest annual fundraiser. It typically attracts over 200 attendees, and raises over $125,000 for the Center. The nonprofit organization uses this money for the many groups and programs it offers. This year’s honorees include community educator Roslyn Sotero, Trans Lifeline Hotline Program Director IV Staklo, Planned Parenthood community organizer Juancarlos Soto, and Partners Café owners David and Bernard Klemens. The event includes dinner, an open bar, a silent auction, and more. Details can be found at dorothyawards.com.

TRIANGLE COMMUNITY CENTER CELEBRATES TRANSGENDER DAY OF VISIBILITY Norwalk’s Triangle Community Center is hosting an event to celebrate Transgender Day of Visibility this March. According to the group’s Facebook page, attendees “will have the opportunity to meet new people, learn new things, and have a day for themselves.” The goal of the event is “to highlight the experiences of transgender people in Connecticut.” TCC also hopes to create a welcoming space for members of the community to make connections. Transgender Day of Visibility, which takes place every year on March 31,

is a day that honors the lives of genderqueer, nonbinary, and transgender individuals. The purpose of the event is to create a platform that ensures that transgender individuals will have the proper visibility, and that their stories will be heard. The Triangle Community Center’s celebration will take place on March 30th. For more information, visit the TTC’s Facebook page.

LGBTQ BUSINESS BREAKFAST COMES TO HARTFORD IN APRIL The Connecticut Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce hosts regular networking breakfasts around Connecticut. This April, the Business Breakfast networking event comes to the capital city. On April 4, members of the LGBTQ community, as well as allies, are invited to come enjoy breakfast at Vivo’s in the Hartford Marriott Downtown. As described on the group’s website, the CTGLC “provides valuable business development opportunities, financial access and educational resources to the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) and allied business community in the greater Connecticut area.” For more on events or membership, visit ctglc.org. [x]

MAR | APR 2019 | 25

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The Blue Lane The newly installed HarborWalk and CoveWalk gives visitors a chance to walk across the city’s hurricane barrier as well as abundant recreational opportunities including outdoor trails, bike paths and beaches. Located nearby, Fort Taber—a 50-acre waterfront park—provides over a mile of ocean frontage located on scenic Clark’s Point which projects into Buzzards Bay.

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Explore whale ecology and conservation, and the history of SouthCoast Massachusetts at the Whaling Museum. Bordered by cobblestone streets overlooking the harbor, the Museum tells the story of human interaction with whales in the world’s oceans, and reveals

the history of the “City that Lit the World.” Marvel at massive whale skeletons and exhibits based on America’s longest painting, which takes you on a whaling voyage around the world. Climb aboard the world’s largest ship model. See outstanding collections of fine and decorative art, including scrimshaw and Golden Age Dutch maritime paintings. Ask about holding your unforgettable wedding in one of the Museum’s unique spaces. whalingmuseum.org

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Annual Events JAN Moby Dick Marathon FEB-DEC AHA! Art, History, and Architecture (2nd Thursday of the month) MAR New Bedford Half Marathon MAY Viva Portugal/Zeiterion Theatre JUN New Bedford Jazz Fest JUL Cape Verdean Recognition Week & Parade JUL New Bedford Folk Festival/Zeiterion Theatre JUL-AUG Summer Sound Series (concerts on Pier 3) AUG Feast of the Blessed Sacrament (Largest Portuguese Feast in the World) SEP Food Truck & Craft Beer Festival OCT WHALE International Wine Festival OCT New Bedford Chowder Festival OCT Oktoberfest DEC Holiday Happenings DEC City Celebrates! New Year’s Eve

destinationnewbedford.org MAR | APR 2019 | 27

SPOTLIGHT News STORY Rob Phelps

Newsmakers | Vermont Green Mountain State Update

them,” Kaplan told NECN. “The best prevention of suicide and self-harm is your internal sense of belonging,” Kaplan said. “What more powerful place to belong than being a part of a team? And in order to have access to that team, you have to have a place to be able to go to change.”

Sanchez-Perez will not only expose him to imminent danger, but will also highly impact the feeling of safety for LGBTQ+ immigrants across Vermont. His detention has already deprived Vermont of a valued and constructive community member.” According to Vermont’s independent media Seven Days, an online petition from Migrant Justice had garnered over 1,000 signature before the end of January.

GENDER-NEUTRAL LOCKER ROOM AT BURLINGTON HIGH

“Beto” Sanchez-Perez

PRIDE CENTER DECRIES ICE DETENTION OF LGBT COMMUNITY LEADER In late December, Cruz Alberto SanchezPerez, a dairy farmer known as “Beto” who’s worked in Vermont since 2016, was arrested by Immigration and Customs Enforcement as he left a court hearing for a traffic stop unrelated to his immigration status. He is now facing deportation.

A newly converted gender-neutral locker room greeted students, faculty and staff returning from winter break to Burlington High School. The conversion of an unused referees locker room that transgender or gender nonconforming students can use, complete with a lockable are and shower, is part of a growing trend in state schools to add them, reported New England Cable News in early January. “It’s so awesome that we finally have one,”

A member of the Burlington-based advocacy nonprofit Migrant Justice, SanchezPerez is also a valued member of the Pride Center of Vermont community. States a January 23 press release: “Pride Center of Vermont has come to know Beto through our work to improve services for LGBTQ+ migrant farmworkers. Beto has been actively involved with Pride Center of Vermont by helping to develop programs for LGBTQ+ migrants in Addison County. He has also participated in workshops with Pride Center of Vermont staff with the goal of improving the ability of local service agencies to serve Spanish-speaking LGBTQ+ clients.

LARGE RALLY PROTESTS HATE GROUP’S VANDALISM In response to hate signs plastered on two LGBT community spaces and a synagogue last week in Burlington, a large “Love Will Prevail” demonstration was held in downtown Burlington on Friday, February 8. The so-called “Patriot Front” hate group targeted The Pride Center of Vermont, Outright Vermont and Ohavi Zedek Synagogue with inflammatory posters. According to a New England Cable News report, “the Southern Poverty Law Center says members of the Patriot Front long for an America made up of only people like them, espousing racism, anti-Semitism and intolerance under the guise of preserving the ‘ethnic and cultural origins’ of their European ancestors.” “We are here, we are stronger together, and this is not the kind of Vermont we will stand for,” said Dana Kaplan, the executive director of Outright Vermont.

“Beto is a valued member of both migrant and LGBTQ+ communities. He has the initiative and leadership abilities that make him stand out as a leader in the groups in which he participates. As such, we have found him to be the kind of person who works effectively to make Vermont a better, more equitable, and more welcoming place for all of its residents. He is an asset to our community who deserves our love and support, especially during this trying time.”

Ezra Totten, a transgender freshman who runs cross-country with the school’s team, told NECN. “Oftentimes, I wasn’t able to practice,” he said, noting skipped trainings due to not always feeling comfortable or safe changing in the guys’ dressing room.

Pride Center, states the release, “is concerned that the detention and potential deportation of Cruz Alberto “Beto”

Dana Kaplan, executive director of Outright Vermont, agreed. “We absolutely applaud

28 | BOSTON SPIRIT

Burlington, Vermont, rally

Dana Kaplan

“It’s about equity,” the school’s principal Noel Green, who approved the conversion, told NECN.

Reported NECN, the three targeted organizations “also drew the support of Governor Phil Scott at his weekly press conference Thursday. In response to a question from NECN, the Republican called on state and community leaders, as well as all residents of his state, to work toward a Vermont that’s free of hate. “‘We can’t tolerate this kind of action,” Scott said of the group that plastered its posters specifically on the LGBT and Jewish organizations. “While free speech is something that’s near and dear to our hearts, that’s not free speech, that’s hate speech. And we have to eradicate that.’” [x]

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SPOTLIGHT News STORY Rob Phelps

Newsmakers | Maine

News from the Pine Tree State

REP. HICKMAN DELIVERS ROUSING KING DAY SPEECH Craig Hickman, the first openly gay AfricanAmerican state representative, addressed a crowd at the Old South First Congregational Church in Farmington on Martin Luther King Jr. Day. “The arc of my life corresponds almost exactly to the span of time since Dr. King handed us the baton in the struggle for beauty, love, peace and justice, and so it seems serendipitous that I would be standing before you today delivering these remarks,” Hickman said. “And even as I stand here, living proof that we have come a long way, let us never deny nor disremember the events that show us we still have a long way to go.” Hickman spoke movingly about his own life, his father’s life and the legacy of Dr. King, with an overarching message of the work still to be done, reported the Kennebec Journal and Morning Sentinel. Today, he said, blacks are still incarcerated at rates disproportionate to whites, “prolonging a new slavery of mass incarceration with no presidential emancipation proclamation on the way,” reported the Journal. “Racial profiling, lynching, poverty and voter suppression still exist.” “We are at a crossroads,” Hickman said. “The soul of this nation is sick. There is no time for silence. There is no time for despair. The election outcome was good, but we must still organize. We must still show up. We must keep the faith. We must have hope, and above all things, we must always vote.”

30 | BOSTON SPIRIT

SPILL THE EQUALI-TEA Equality Maine is proudly hosting its ninth annual LGBTQ+ youth conference on March 8 on the Biddeford Campus of the University of New England—and calling it “Spill the Equali-Tea” all it’s literally overflowing with activity. The full event brings together youth, families, educators and other professionals in a dialog to elevate LGBTQ+ youth. Topics include youth-adult collaboration, student organizing, art and self-care, law and policy, literature representation, mental health and more. Light breakfast and lunch will be provided. Registration is open until March 4 at equalitymaine.org, and more details are available by sending an email to mwilliams@equalitymaine.org. Financial assistance is available.

HOULTON PFLAG GOING STRONG Way up on the Canadian border, a local LGBT group in the Aroostook County town of Houlton is sending positive vibes throughout its community. Bangor-based The County gave the small but active PFLAG Houlton a shout out for its advocacy and education in an early January feature: “In June 2015, the Houlton group became officially recognized by the national PFLAG organization. The group meets at 6 p.m. on the third Wednesday of each month at the Cup Café in the basement of the Unitarian Universalist Church on Military Street.

Meetings are confidential and open to anyone. “Membership is small, Holden said, with only about seven individuals attending regularly, but it has grown in the past year. Efforts to spread the word about the fledgling group have been done through information booths set up at the Houlton Agricultural Fair or at Houlton’s Potato Feast Days craft fair. “The group also branched out to other areas in 2018, with some members marching in two parades representing PFLAG Houlton — the Bangor Pride Parade and the Fort Fairfield Potato Blossom Parade. “We were encouraged with the amount of vocal support we got from onlookers at Potato Blossom,” group member Sarah Bosse, told The County. “We are also helping MaineTransNet’s (MTN) efforts to start transgender support groups in Presque Isle and Houlton in 2019. This effort is part of carrying out their initiative of supporting transgender persons of all ages throughout the state.” The group is working with GSTAs (gay, straight, transgender alliances) in local schools to host an alternative prom this spring for LGBT high school students and their allies across the county. “And finally, in 2019 we hope to increase our community advocacy regarding the harm associated with conversion therapy, as well as AIDS/STD awareness and prevention,” Bosse said. For more, email pflaghoulton@gmail.com. [x]

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FEATURE Business STORY Rob Phelps

Seyfarth and Shaw at 2018 Pride

The Changing Nature of Corporate Diversity How companies in New England are leading the way with more inclusive policies and practices Only a few years ago, equal pay for women, job opportunities for people of color, accommodations for the differently abled and antidiscrimination protections for all marginalized groups were front-and-center issues in the struggle for diversity and inclusion in the workplace. Of course this all remains true. The struggle goes on. However, in recent years many large corporations in New England have been hard at work developing policies and procedures to address these issues, and some of these companies in our region like Eastern Bank and Harvard Pilgrim Health Care started D&I initiatives as early as 25 years ago, simply because they recognized it was the right thing to do.

32 | BOSTON SPIRIT

More recent progress has been facilitated by grassroots organizations like Freedom Massachusetts, the nonprofit geared toward bringing together advocates for transgender rights across a wide range of interests—from government agencies and law enforcement to faith leadership, educators, labor unions and the business community. As a result, initiatives like the Massachusetts Freedom for Business Coalition were created. Launched in 2015. major corporations joined the coalition to endorse transgender rights and spread the word to their wide audiences of colleagues and customers. A year later, Governor Charlie Baker signed into law transgender protections, which were overwhelming defended

against the referendum to roll them back at the ballot box last November. As progress rolls forward in communities where corporations are based in and serve, the value of businesses better reflecting the people in these communities has become clearer.

Good for business Winson Wang, a Boston-based corporate banking associate at TD Bank and New England chair of the bank’s LGBT business resource group, said his company strives to “recognize the differences among people, better understand each individual’s unique characteristics, and engage those differences to create a work culture of belonging and collaboration.” This is very good business practice “because when someone is comfortable bringing their whole self to work, then it’s more likely that that person will contribute to the best of their abilities. And if everyone at the bank feels that way, then

“ When someone is comfortable bringing their full self to work, then it’s more likely that that person will contribute to the best of their abilities. And if everyone at the bank feels that way, then the organization ultimately benefits from all those people operating at their full potential.” Winson Wang New England LGBT business resource group chair, TD Bank

the organization ultimately benefits from all those people operating at their full potential,” Wang explained. “This allows us to have more innovative solutions, more creative problem solving, and to share different viewpoints so that we can establish better, more robust practices here at the bank,” he said. In other words, diversity and inclusion are very good for business.

Brains and passion Having a more diverse workforce, of course, begins at the hiring stage. At PTC, the global software and services technology company headquartered in Boston, a new employment initiative called “Hiring for Brains and Passion” was enacted in 2018. Kathy Cullen-Cote, vice president for human resources at PTC, described the program like this: “When you hire someone because they look and sound and have credentials just like everybody else, we know that doesn’t work. We wind up with people who just want to see a nail and grab a hammer and bang it in.” So PTC trained “100 percent” of its managers across the globe on a new approach that includes a panel of diverse members of each team for every job description, and revamped their entire recruitment practices with an eye toward developing D&I at PTC. Similarly, TD Bank is expanding its hiring pool to include “more diverse individuals who are reflective of the diverse communities that we serve,” said Wang.

They do this through initiatives like job fairs, resume workshops and mentoring programs. With major offices in Boston, the global law firm Seyfarth Shaw implemented a version of the NFL’s “Rooney Rule,” where teams must interview ethnic minority candidates for NFL senior-level positions, including head coach. Seyfarth’s policy, started in 2016, ensures that “at least one diverse candidate is interviewed for each associate opening,” said Kate Perrelli, a partner working from the firm’s Boston office. As a result, diverse hires among Seyfarth’s associates climbed to 44 percent in 2017. That same year, women of color and LGBT employees together made up 65 percent of Seyfarth’s associates and partners.

Employee resource groups As corporations work toward including a more diverse workforce, they are also turning to their employees for guidance on policies and practices that foster diversity and inclusion and make the work environment more comfortable and productive. Based in Boston for more than 200 years, the venerable financial services firm Brown Brothers Harriman has offices across six continents with a commitment to furthering its D&I policies in every corner of the globe, including less socially progressive regions around the world. According to Raymond Cyr, vice president working at the Boston headquarters, they do this largely through

Dr. Claudia Coplein, head of wellness, MassMutual

Case study: Corporate leadership answers diversity groups with action A great example of corporate response to D&I issues in the workforce is MassMutual’s progressive new expansion of benefits, rolled out in January 2019. “These expansions are a direct result of employee feedback,” said Dr. Claudia Coplein, head of wellness for the Springfield, Massachusetts-based corporation, which is also opening new offices at the Boston Seaport this year. With over 450 voices nationwide in the company’s LGBT Employee Business Group (EBG), Pride, there came plenty of feedback on LGBTQ issues through this group, just one of the company’s eight EBGs that consistently share their concerns with corporate leadership. Started 11 years ago, Pride is the company’s first EBG, but equally active are groups focusing on the interests of women, African Americans, Latinx, Asian Americans, veterans of armed forces, people with disabilities, young professionals and the allies of all of these groups. Their members make up more than 20 percent of the company’s workforce, and of course this number only reflects the percent of employees who’ve joined these groups.

CASE STUDY [CONTINUES 35] MAR | APR 2019 | 33

CHANGING NATURE [FROM 33] their Affinity Network Community, which includes 10 groups representing a rainbow of diversity from the Pride network of LGBTQ employees, to networks for people of color, women, “diverse ability allies,” parents, young professionals and a “global employee network” promoting multicultural awareness. “These networks were created from the shared belief that we all benefit from a workplace where colleagues are comfortable being themselves. Employees with different backgrounds and interests come together to expand their knowledge, strengthen career skills and build new relationships through volunteer activities, networking sessions, and other events that promote global knowledge sharing and community building across the firm.” Commonly known as ERGs, or employee resource groups, each of the corporations in this story are increasingly relying on them to help develop the policies and practices that enhance their workplaces and ultimately their bottom lines. Ryan Trapani-Goldberg, a cofounder of the LGBT resource group at PTC, started working at the company about three years

CHANGING NATURE [CONTINUES 36]

“I encourage everyone working in corporations to gather and form ERGs if they don’t already have them. It just feels great to come to work fully as you are.” Ryan LGBT employee resource group cofounder, PTC

Ryan Trapani-Goldberg [RIGHT] and husband Dan Trapani Goldberg at Boston Pride

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CASE STUDY [FROM 33] To assemble the 2019 benefits expansion, leadership listened to all employees, whether or not they were members of the groups, while making sure the interests of every EBG had a significant place at the planning table. “We wanted to make sure our benefits are designed to be adaptable to diverse situations and be inclusive to everyone,” Coplein said. The company already had a strong record, consistently earning a score of 100 on the Human Rights Campaign’s Corporate Equality Index, for example. But its leadership wanted to do even better.

Redefining ‘loved ones’ Take the expansion’s redefinition of “loved one,” now defined by each employee. “Who are we as a company to determine who is important to an individual? The truth is that everybody’s situation and circle of loved ones is different. This is an opportunity to empower our employees to define family and loved ones on their own terms.” This approach applies to the expansion of their “caregiver leave” program, which understands an employee may be caring for young children but maybe also parents, or a grandparent, or a college roommate, or you name it. This is now true too for bereavement leave, where a traditional plan might offer five days off for an immediate family member defined as a parent, child or spouse, or three days for extended family like a cousin, nephew or in-law. “We’ve done away with that completely,” Coplein says.

“We’ve not only increased the amount of paid time off, but we leave it up to the employee to define who the loved one is, and how much time they need to grieve the loss.” As for bringing new family members into the world, benefits for family planning, fertility and parental leave are greatly expanded as well with 10 weeks of fully paid time off for mothers to recover from the birth of a child plus an additional eight weeks for parents of any gender to bond with their new offspring. Fertility treatment and medication coverage no longer requires the “medical necessity” definition of “infertility,” Coplein said, “because quite frankly members of the LGBTQ community or people who choose to be single parents could never meet that definition. So again, who are we to decide how you should create your family?” Transgender services are another major piece of the expansion. The company already covered the basics for those going through gender affirmation like hormone therapy testing, mental health counseling, genital surgery, and mastectomies. That coverage has now expanded to things previously not considered medically necessary or “cosmetic” in nature. “For a person going through gender affirmation, that’s not cosmetic,” Coplein said. “To maximize their success, their appearance needs to be fully transitioned.” Other key areas of expansion are in behavioral health and cancer care. “We want to destigmatize mental health issues, and we want to make care more accessible for all,” Coplein said, who

CASE STUDY [CONTINUES 36]

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CHANGING NATURE [FROM 34]

CASE STUDY [FROM 35]

ago. He said they’d been an informal LGBT group that had met for lunch for about 20 years. Times had changed, and the people in it felt more comfortable “going public” by the time he’d come on the job. As soon as they did, he said, no one looked back. His coworkers not only supported them but they asked for advice about LGBT family members and other questions that led to a more comfortable working environment. PTC’s branding department even created T-shirts for the group to wear at Pride parades and other events. Together, the ERGs developed a website for all employees to follow, so everyone can learn more about each other, share interests and build relationships. Trapani-Goldberg and his husband and PTC colleague Dan, marched in their first Boston Pride parade with PTC last year. “It was amazing,” he said. “So many LGBT employees marched together, but you know what? There were even more non-LGBT employees marching there with us. PTC is an amazing place to work. I encourage everyone working in other places to gather and form ERGs if they don’t already have them. It just feels great to come to work fully as you are.” [x]

MassMutual at Northampton Pride stressed that the company is similarly committed to supporting employees and their loved ones facing cancer and has greatly expanded benefits there too. Another new program is in paid volunteer time. MassMutual already sponsors a host of community-related events, but now employees can take time off to share their talents and skills with causes closest to their hearts. “Who are we to decide what sort of relationship one has with their community and various causes? We’re

leaving that up to each individual,” Coplein said. Overall, Coplein said, “This expansion is another step in MassMutual’s cultural evolution to become a more flexible and inclusive company. We feel it’s important to build upon what we’ve said is our foundation of trust and integrity and help our employees take better care of themselves and the ones they love, and we’re willing to stand behind this to be an inclusive employer of choice.”—RP

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FROM DOWNTOWN TO PROVINCETOWN 36 | BOSTON SPIRIT

FEATURE Environment/Business STORY Nina Livingstone

On the Waterfront How Boston Harbor CEO Kathy Abbott strikes a delicate balance between environment and economics Growing up on Cape Cod, Kathy Abbott watched as housing developments consumed the land and pollution crept into the bay. By the age of 14, she’d set her sights on environmental work. In 2016, Abbott, was named president and CEO of Boston Harbor Now (BHN), making development and environmental preservation working companions. With a staff of 12 and a $4.2 million budget, she is clear about BHN’s priorities: “Accessibility and climate resiliency of our waterfront and islands. “A combination of unprecedented development of the waterfront and sea level rise created the need for a stronger advocate and implementer on the harbor,” says Abbott of BNH’s creation—the merging of

the Boston Harbor Association with the Boston Harbor Island Alliance. “There is a limited amount of waterfront and the public has rights to filled land (a significant portion of the waterfront) and to the harbor. It was critical that we take a stronger stand to protect, plan and build for the public’s use and enjoyment of the harbor,” she added. In the 1980s, Harborwalk was conceived in a waterfront plan. Abbott explains. “Its purpose was to provide public access to the waterfront in Boston. Boston has 47 miles of waterfront and Harborwalk has been built on approximately 43 miles of it. Taking action is the ethos of Boston Harbor Now, with Harborwalk and the National and State Park leading the way.

Kathy Abbott

“Today, in the face of climate change and sea level rise, it is critical that Harborwalk become as much about protecting us from the rising tide and storm surge as it is about access,” she explains. “We can’t responsibly provide access without resiliency.” But numerous challenges remain: how to build up and build out and create the waterfront described in Resilient Boston Harbor, the city’s plan to protect Boston neighborhoods and enhance the waterfront. How do we finance it publicly and privately? What are the changes we need to make to regulations to enable this work? How do we organize ourselves to get it done and how do we prioritize the efforts required?

Balancing work of personal life These are the questions that dominate Abbott’s day, which usually stretches

MAR | APR 2019 | 37

late into the night with mandatory social events dotting her jammed calendar. There is no “typical day” on her schedule, she says. From board meetings to fundraisers to strategic planning sessions to dinner meetings, Abbott is constantly on the move. So how does she cope with the stress? “I usually ride my bike, weather depending, from my home to my office—four miles each way ... that’s 40 miles a week,” she says matter-of-factly, adding that she occasionally walks the route. Yoga and meditation are where she finds her moments of calm. Being creative in the arts—learning how to play the ukulele, painting, cooking, reading—provide other outlets. “And spending time with people I love,” she says, topping off her list. A striking woman, 5-foot-5 Abbott describes herself as athletic, which does come in handy. Even in her usual combination of dress and scarf, she moves quickly. To make a meeting on time, you may find Abbott running from building to building, or if time is really tight, taking the classic shortcut across streets, down sidewalks, through parking lots and

clearing the occasional guardrail. The latter is not a story she often shares, perhaps because it came with a split up her dress and a dash to the door, slipping into her seat right on time. Although Abbott, who is an openly gay woman, says she no longer sees herself in a male-dominated field, although she won’t discount the fact that men do outnumber women in leadership positions. “I am heartened by the number of women now stepping up to lead politically [both] locally and nationally,” she says, as well as the progress lesbians have made in all arenas. Being named among Boston magazine’s “100 Most Influential People in Boston” may be a title she proudly carries, yet it isn’t what keeps her motivated. Perhaps instead it’s the photographs she shares of storm surges taking over playgrounds, covering park benches and filling nearby Boston streets, offering us a glimpse into the future—a future where those same places are filled with smiling children and happy families.

A critical juncture “Boston Harbor Now sits at a critical juncture between the private and public sector on waterfront development and economic issues; and with the private, city, state and federal governments on park issues,” Abbott says. “It is about understanding and respecting the different needs and perspectives and always negotiating for the best possible outcome for the greatest number of people. “Ten years from now we hope that we can be proud of our harbor and that everybody—every child growing up—has an opportunity to own it. “Public and private parks and open spaces, these are the backbone of a more accessible, engaging and resilient waterfront that protects and greatly enhances the lives of our people and our economy,” Abbott says. Last summer, Boston Harbor Now created and launched the Harborwalk Web Tool, which enables the public to easily find out where they can go and what they can do on the waterfront; the public access

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program to the islands grew from 19,000 to 35,000 youth and families. “But like any other nonprofit the single biggest challenge isn’t the work, it’s finding ways to raise the funds and generate income to support the work,” Abbott says. “How would I describe the harbor? The city is almost half land and half water. The harbor is Greater Boston’s largest public open space with 34 islands, hundreds of miles of shoreline, views in every direction of sea, sky, and islands, including cargo ships, sail boats and Boston’s skyline,” she says. Harborwalk 2.0 is the next step. UMASS Boston studied the potential for building a barrier across Boston Harbor from Winthrop to Hull and determined that it would take 30 years and cost approximately $18 billion, says Abbott. “As we learned last winter, and in watching weather impacts on other cities around the country, we need to be addressing the issues of the changing climate now with shore side protections. The barrier will continue to be looked as we work hard in the next 12 years to mitigate carbon and make Boston carbon free by 2050.”

Boston Harbor Abbott credits Boston Mayor Marty Walsh, Amos Hostetter and the Barr Foundation, the Green Ribbon Commission, and Gov. Charlie Baker for putting Boston in the national spotlight in its efforts to address climate change through adaptation and mitigation.

“Now it is up to the rest of us to accept responsibility and act,” she says. To become a supporter of Boston Harbor Now, contact jgarvey@bostonharbornow.org or call 617-223-8667. [x]

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FEATURE Sports STORY Tom Joyce

Martin Johnson, 1978 State Rep. Barney Frank throwing out first pitch, 1979 [RIGHT] Seth Hyde, 1978 [LEFT]

Play Ball!

[MIDDLE]

Seth Hyde reflects on 40 years of Beantown Softball League In 2019, Boston is a city where the LGBTQIA community is especially strong and enjoys a wide array of social opportunities to connect with one another. Four decades ago, however, that was hardly the case, but Seth Hyde helped lay the foundation for it. Hyde was the first commissioner of the Beantown Softball League, which enjoyed its 40-year anniversary in 2018. While there are more than a dozen LGBTQIA sports leagues in the city nowadays, the BSL, in many ways, could be considered one of the pioneers as the first to compete outdoors. A baseball fan himself, Hyde’s trips to the now-closed Chaps after attending Red Sox games with his straight friends led to what was revolutionary for the time. “I would see other guys wearing Red Sox hats,” Hyde said of his Chaps trips. “The stereotypes were so drilled into us, so whenever you found someone who was

40 | BOSTON SPIRIT

Seth Hyde, 2018

gay who liked sports, it was a revelation. It was really great to see people who also enjoyed the Sox.” In 1977, a pair of gay softball leagues in New York and San Francisco held a tournament which received coverage in many national gay publications at the time-which left Hyde intrigued and led him to suggest the idea to some of his gay friends,

who also had a volleyball group going in the city at the time. Hyde spoke to some local gay bars about potentially sponsoring teams and they put an ad in the now-defunct Gay Community News with a meeting date; another man saw the ad and got group together at a bar at the same time. Ultimately, the two groups merged together to form the initial league for the 1978 season. In 1980, the league became more serious under Hyde’s control. He was elected commissioner that year and was the only person in the league who used their full name. Many of the players were not out of the closet yet, so they went by their first name and an initial. That season, they played 20 games from May to August and their playoffs ran through Labor Day. They even had practice nights during the week because it was one of the few outlets they had; it also did not hurt that everyone in the league had played a lot of sports growing up. “It was a wonderful thing to have,” Hyde said. “Back in those days, gay bars were the only outlet for the community. Not only was it scary to go into a bar because someone you know might see you go into

the bar, but it was scary to be there since you could run into someone you know or a relative. It was a difficult time to be gay and a lot of people didn’t have large circles of friends.” “We weren’t isolated, but for a lot of gay men and women, it was a very lonely time,” he added. “My mantra is that the gay community is made up of a lot of building blocks. All of these organizations are a part of what the gay community is today. To have been a part of one of the building blocks is very rewarding. We never would’ve dreamt in our wildest imagination that it would still be going to this day.” Now, the skill level in the league varies with a greater participation rate; in spring 2018, there were 21 teams across four divisions, the teams compete on weekends and every year, there are two seasons: spring and fall. Hyde said the league ended up splitting into two seasons per year because in July and August, its members like spending their weekends in Ogunquit and Provincetown.

“ I think it’s been a pretty positive experience for everyone involved,” he said. “People have met their life partners in the league and things like that. ” Seth Hyde “It’s not the same level of play nowadays, but the enthusiasm and the social networks that are growing out of it are very nice to see,” he said. “It’s awesome to think 40 years later, we’re still giving people an opportunity to meet others like them, especially if they’re new to the city or new coming out. It’s pretty cool.”

With the dwindling presence of gay bars in the city, the league’s social atmosphere has also changed. Following games, the teams used to go to the bars that sponsored them. While a few teams still have sponsors, Hyde said the social gatherings in the summer also include pool parties, trips to Provincetown and attending tournaments in other cities where they party together. “I think it’s been a pretty positive experience for everyone involved,” he said. “People have met their life partners in the league and things like that.” Hyde also said during the 1980s, the league became involved with the AIDS Action Committee of Massachusetts, doing what they could to help fundraise and spread awareness for the cause which impacted them directly. “When I look at pictures of my teams from back then, each time I can see three or four people who died from AIDS,” he said. “That’s the sad part of it. But the good part is that we were very involved with funding and spreading awareness for it as well.” [x]

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FEATURE Memorial STORY Scott Kearnan

Bright Light Remembering night life impresario and community leader Chris Harris Chris Harris lit up the night. If you came out or came of age in New England’s gay nightlife post-2000, you probably partied at one of the many vibrant events conceived by Chris Harris Presents, named for the beloved producer and promoter. During a period when many gay clubs shuttered in the Boston area, Harris was credited with keeping alive a certain brand of big-room excitement—from massive military balls and performances featuring “RuPaul’s Drag Race” vets, to concerts

and club nights at EGO, a Providence, Rhode Island club he co-owned. His profile grew over the years, and he wound up tapped for circuit parties around the country. When the sun went down, he didn’t just illuminate the darkness; he filled it with every color of the rainbow. Harris died in January at age 51, following a battle with cancer. But those who knew him best say that his legacy will live on in the memories he made. “He was a force of nature, a self-made man, and an

Chris Harris amazing friend,” says DJ Richie LaDue, who worked with Harris regularly at events like EGO Saturdays. “Trying to describe Chris is like trying to describe what a hug feels like. When a person goes to a Chris Harris event and sings and dances and laughs and drinks and flirts and kisses and twerks and vogues and gets wildly entertained by famous

drag performers those fun, awesome feelings that are created and shared are his legacy. He was keenly aware of how important it is for all people to have a place to either escape or celebrate their lives.” Rafael Sanchez of Gay Mafia Boston, Harris’s events business partner and his EGO coowner, shared some thoughts on social media.

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“I’m grateful to have been able to share this life with you and know one day we will meet again to keep the party going up there,” Sanchez wrote in a post addressed to Harris posthumously. “As promised, your legacy will be kept alive and dreams we shared will be fulfilled.” Though many New Englanders best knew Harris for his parties, friends and peers also point to his big heart. DJ Dena Cucci, one of Harris’s closest friends, remembers the support he showed when she was diagnosed with breast cancer 10 years ago. “He insisted on me getting a second opinion, and came to the appointment,” she says. “I was a nervous wreck.” To help her relax, Harris blew up surgical gloves like balloons, and hid them in drawers and cabinets for the doctor to find. “We laughed all the way home,” Cucci says. “He knew something that stupid would help me relax, and I’ll never forget it.” Harris, a Rhode Island native, was also dedicated to building a bigger, stronger community in that smallest state. He supported homegrown talent like the Perry Twins, now an LA-based DJ, remix and production duo with regular tour dates around the country. “Derek and I wouldn’t have the DJ careers we have now if it wasn’t for him,” says Doug Perry. He remembers when Harris cohosted a redcarpet release party in West Hollywood for the Twins. “It was a really big moment for friends from Rhode Island to experience and accomplish something like that together.” Rhode Island Pride honored Harris’s lifetime of service to the local community by awarding him its annual Pyramid of Pride Award shortly before his passing.

The organization’s board of directors has also named Harris as an honorary marshall in its 2019 Illuminated Night Time Parade, which will take place on Saturday, June 15. Similarly, Boston Pride has named Harris as an honorary parade marshal for its upcoming parade on Saturday, June 8. Linda DeMarco, former president of Boston Pride and current acting president of its board of directors, hopes Harris will be remembered for his great generosity—including support for Boston Pride that goes back to 2007, when he produced a major fundraiser for the organization. “He wrote a check for us for $10,000, and I almost died,” says DeMarco. “For Boston Pride to get a check like that then was unheard of.” Harris’s support continued over the years. “Even if he didn’t make anything from an event, he always gave some to us,” she says. The bright light Harris shared won’t be forgotten. DeMarco recalls the “Celebration of Life” event that followed Harris’s passing, which took place at Providence’s Biltmore Hotel and was followed by a parade procession to EGO. Along the way, there were fireworks—and that, she says, was all too perfect. Once more, he brightened the night sky. “He always wanted fireworks,” says DeMarco. “It was his way to say, ‘celebrate your identity, celebrate love, and enjoy life.’” Donations can be made online to the Chris Harris Tribute Fund at the National LGBT Cancer Network at ChrisHarrisTribute.org. This fund will be used to establish a LGBTQ cancer prevention and education program in Rhode Island and beyond. [x]

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In May 2018 over 1,200 area LGBT professionals attended Boston Spirit’s LGBT Executive Networking Night, along with 54 companies exhibiting at the event. Whether you are looking to grow your business, network with other in your industry, or looking for a new career, this is the event for you. You must RSVP to attend this event. To RSVP visit Boston Spirit online at bostonspiritmagazine.com.

THURSDAY MAY 2, 2019 Boston Marriott Copley Place, 6–9:00 p.m.

FEATURED SPEAKER

RHODE ISLAND CONGRESSMAN DAVID CICILLINE

You must RSVP to attend this event

RSVP

There is a $15 admission fee at the door to attend the event.

44 | BOSTON SPIRIT

In addition to being one of us (a New Englander) Congressman Cicilline is the most senior gay member of Congress and a Co-Chair of the Congressional LGBT Equality Caucus. In 2015 Congressman Cicilline introduced the Equality Act to extend comprehensive anti-discrimination protections to the LGBT community in public accommodations, housing, employment, federal funding, education, credit, and jury service. In most states, it is legal for employers, renters, and educational institutions to discriminate against Americans based on their sexual orientation or gender identity. The Equality Act prohibits discrimination across all 50 states by expanding the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and other existing civil rights laws.

IN ADDITION TO OUR FEATURED SPEAKER THERE WILL ALSO BE SEVERAL PROFESSIONAL AND PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT SESSIONS TAILORED SPECIFICALLY FOR LGBT PROFESSIONALS PRES E N T I NG SPONSORS

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MAR | APR 2019 | 45

SEASONAL Weddings STORY Scott Kearnan

What makes a wedding day a truly special Day? Only each couple can say. Planning a wedding can be pretty overwhelming. Everyone has advice to offer, professional help can be expensive, and even the best DIY efforts are sometimes DOA. But one of the best ways to find inspiration is to simply read up on how other real couples created their most special day. From wild parties to simple affairs, we’ve rounded up a few very different weddings that prove every approach has its pros. So, go ahead. Read about these sweet romances, then start celebrating your own.

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BRYAN& LUCY GUILLAUME JANELLE SALVATORE &SUE &BOBBY &RACHEL 46 | BOSTON SPIRIT

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BRYAN&SALVATORE 48 | BOSTON SPIRIT

Bryan & Salvatore Finocchio-Forte Bryan Finocchio-Forte is a professional event planner. His first wedding? His own. “I was always anti-wedding,” explains Bryan, whose company 33 Munroe typically focused on nonprofit and corporate events, fashion shows, and dinner parties. Nuptials weren’t really on the agenda. “I didn’t want to be in that market. It seemed crazy.” But then it was time for Bryan and his now-husband, Salvatore Finocchio-Forte, to create their own super-stylish, summertime wedding. Appropriately enough, the couple first met in the midst of a production: a community theatre staging of “West Side Story,” in which the future beaus played members of rival gangs. Eight years later, they married at the chic Liberty Hotel in Boston. Professionally, the venue was a poignant one: It’s where Bryan staged the first installment of Catwalk for a Cure, a series of cancer-fighting fashion fundraisers he launched back in 2010. More importantly, though, it was the perfect setting to create a day that married the couple’s different visions. Bryan wanted an urban feel, while Salvatore craved outdoor space with plenty of plants. The Liberty offered both: The hip hotel, known for a buzzy cocktailing scene in its atrium lobby, is a historic former jailhouse that now boasts both beautiful ballrooms (just right for the reception) and a cool courtyard (to host the ceremony). To add even more lushness, the couple worked with Bloom Couture Floral Studio to create whimsical, topiary-like designs. Greenery like French eucalyptus dominated, while pops of orange flowers also made their way to the couple’s boutonnieres, where they were accented by fragrant rosemary. In addition, the Liberty is dogfriendly — pretty important, since their pooch Duncan served as ringbearer for the ceremony.

“We decided early on that we didn’t want to do a super traditional wedding,” says Salvatore. “We wanted it to feel like a party.” To make that happen, the couple opted for unassigned seating and buffet-style stations, rather than a formal coursed dinner. Guests enjoyed some of the gents’ favorite foods: from tuna lollipops to buffalo chicken sliders, to Maine lobsterbedecked pasta with cheese. Dessert came from Union Square Donuts, a cult-favorite pastry shop in Somerville; the cake was just for cutting.

We decided early on that we didn’t want to do a super traditional wedding. We wanted it to feel like a party. Salvatore And on the beverage side, each groom chose a signature cocktail. Bryan opted for the Hot ‘N Dirty, an elixir of vodka, spicy Sriracha sauce and pickle juice that is served at the Blue Ox, a top restaurant in their town of Lynn. Salvatore selected the Ginger Mule, vodka with pineapple juice and ginger beer. “We wanted people to eat when they wanted to, and dance when they wanted to,” says Salvatore. Dance they did, to tunes that DJ Trex (aka Thomas White) selected after listening to a four-hour Spotify playlist the couple provided to illustrate their general sonic style. The couple’s hands-on approach should come as no surprise, especially given Bryan’s events-oriented career. He was methodical and organized even in his Christmastime marriage proposal: After they decorated their tree, Bryan presented Sal with a series of six ornaments representing each year together. Every ornament told a piece of their story, from the black dog that looked like

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Venue

The Liberty Hotel Photography

Nicole Mason, Newbury Photographs DJ

Thomas White (DJ Trex) Florals

Bloom Couture Dessert

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Ted Baker and Cole Haan Duncan to the NYC taxi that referenced their love for the Big Apple and Broadway. The last ornament was a glass bulb bearing the big question: “Will you marry me?” He never thought he’d love to plan weddings, but after experiencing the happiness and excitement of his own nuptials, Bryan enthusiastically expanded his events work to help other couples build their ideal day.

And yet, Salvatore also shares some pretty sage advice to future newlyweds: unless it’s literally your job, don’t turn the wonders of wedding-planning into work. “Enjoy the process of it,” says Salvatore. “It can be a really overwhelming process, and really stressful at times. Remember why you’re doing it. Everything’s going to be worth it.”

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LUCY&SUE

Lucy Abbott & Sue Pawlishen To celebrate their future together, Lucy Abbott and Sue Pawlishen gained newfound inspiration from the past. The sweet couple were married amid the beautiful rust-colored foliage of a New England fall on the grounds of the Amherst Woman’s Club in Western Massachusetts, the region where Sue grew up and Lucy went to college. The clubhouse, an 1864-built Italianate Renaissance mansion, sits across the street from the Emily Dickinson Museum, where Lucy once worked. It was founded as a place for women to gather and advance conversations around literary, scientific and other cultural topics during an era when such spaces were quite rare. “She wanted to create a place for women that was, at the time, revolutionary,” says Lucy of the club’s pioneering creator. “We wanted this mix of history and the outdoors.”

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“She loves old things. I joke that’s why she loves me,” laughs Sue, who is eight years Lucy’s senior. They first met at the same hot yoga class, practicing mat-by-mat for about three months before Lucy finally asked Sue out for a date. Their love blossomed, and soon Sue popped the question at perhaps the most iconic romantic landmark: the Eiffel Tower, where they shared a picnic and Lucy received a painstakingly-created replica of a 1910 Tiffany’s engagement ring. The structure of the wedding ceremony was particularly important to the couple, who emphasized the equality of partnership by walking down the aisles simultaneously, escorted by their parents. They worked with Lucy’s friend, an interfaith minister, to create a mix of traditional and new age-inspired components: say, a ring exchange coupled with small rites associated with the four elements. Lucy’s college

acapella group even surprised them with a surprise performance of the Beatles song, “And I Love Her.” Later, during the reception, Lucy serenaded Sue herself with “The Way I Am,” a love song by feminist, folksy singer-songwriter Ingrid Michaelson. The celebration was full of many other personal touches. For instance, they eschewed a wedding cake for cider donuts and a wedding pie from nearby Atkins Farms, topping the latter with two decorative birds. “We always ask each other, ‘What kind of bird are you?’” explains Lucy, referencing a line from the whimsical, New Englandset film “Moonrise Kingdom,” from one of their favorite directors, Wes Anderson. The couple felt surrounded by a “bubble of love” on their special day, says Sue. That support made it easier to express themselves, and their love for each other, in a way that was truly authentic—including when it came to wedding attire. “There was a lot of anxiety about that on my end,” says Sue. “I wanted an outfit representative of my best self. I didn’t feel comfortable in formal dresses. On the

other hand, I didn’t feel comfortable in a full suit, tie and pocket square. I was on this spectrum, trying to find clothes that truly defined me.” She found those clothes while browsing the J. Crew wedding collection online, stumbling upon a blazer in the same fabric and cream color as Lucy’s vintage-glamour-style dress from Anthropologie’s wedding brand, BHLDN. There was exactly one blazer left. It was the perfect match, and Sue paired it with a pair of blue pants. Outfit hunting aside, planning a queer wedding was pretty smooth cruising, says the couple. Though, these history lovers acknowledge that was only so because of the trailblazers who led the way. “The special thing about this area is that it wasn’t a bumpy road for us at all,” says Sue. “It had been paved like a major highway with palm trees. It was easy because of all the people who came before us, put themselves out there, and said, ‘I want to hold hands. I want to get married. I want to do this.’” “We got to experience marital bliss on the shoulders of everyone who came before us.”

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GUILLAUME &BOBBY

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Guillaume Bagal & Bobby Gondola Jr. By virtue of their careers—and gregarious personalities—Guillaume Bagal and Bobby Gondola Jr. are fixtures on the region’s social scene, often spotted rubbing shoulders at philanthropic galas and other events. So for their own wedding in Newport, famed for its Gilded Age entertaining, they found a way to throw an unforgettable blacktie party that still carved out opportunities to share their special day in private. Newport is also where the couple got engaged in 2016, during the annual Governor’s Ball to support scholarships to Salve Regina University, where Bobby went to college. Guillaume invented an excuse to steal Bobby away from the crowd, luring him upstairs at swanky Ochre Court, a French chateau-style mansion. Once they were alone, Guillaume proposed—and when the newly-betrothed emerged to return to the festivities, the guests, clued in to the exciting news, surprised them with applause and hoisted toasts of champagne. The bubbly continued to flow at their wedding last August, which transformed the 1850s-built

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Fairlawn estate into a fabulous fete that combined old-world class with contemporary doses of wit and whimsy. Attendees arrived via trolley from the Newport Congregational Church, where the couple held their ceremony inside the only surviving architectural interior by celebrated artist John La Farge. Guillaume’s father became a Universal Life minister to officiate, and the newlyweds held a receiving line to personally thank guests on their way out, sending them off with champagne and macaron ice cream sandwiches. Once at Fairlawn, guests were greeted with glasses of locally-made frozen lemonade spiked with a choice of rum, vodka, or tequila. Gracie’s, a four diamondawarded restaurant in Providence, closed its restaurant for the day just to cater their wedding with an elegant yet informal dinner. “We’ve attended a lot of events together, so we considered: what are the things we talk about, from a guest’s perspective?” says Bobby, who also tapped some of the event organizing experience he honed as

director of global philanthropy for Hasbro, and in his current work as associate vice president at Community College of Rhode Island. “I wanted a bustling cocktail format, and Guillaume wanted to make sure our guests were fed and full.” Smartly, the couple shared their own private dinner before joining the crowd. The champagne bottle from their engagement served as a flower vase-centerpiece, and they again made a point to savor a special memory sans distraction. After all, there was plenty of excitement at the reception. After cutting a rainbow tiered caked baked by Bobby’s sister, the party was “crashed” by a gourmet-Frenchfries food truck and a kooky crew of “monsters” wearing oversized creature masks from Big Nazo, a Providence performance group known for its innovative, over-thetop puppetry. Vanderbilt-era Newport, this was not. Choosing “culturally competent” vendors was a priority for Guillaume, who leads diversity and inclusion at Blue Cross Blue Shield of Rhode Island and is former

president of Washington, DC’s Gay and Lesbian Activist Alliance, the country’s oldest continuously active LGBTQ civil right organization. “Looking at the politics of our vendors was really important to me,” says Guillaume, who tapped a photographer from DC that had experience properly lighting the different skin tones of interracial couples. Guillaume is originally from Cameroon and Bobby is a Massachusetts native, so the DJ’s selection mixed American pop hits with vibrant African house music. The florals also incorporated beautiful African flowers, including Bird-ofparadise, Guillaume’s mother’s favorite. After the wedding, the couple flew to Turks and Caicos on a honeymoon that Bobby booked as a surprise. Pretty fitting, considering the couple first met by happenstance at an airport, when Bobby complimented Guillaume’s jacket; by the time got on his flight, Bobby had already texted his friends that he’d found the man he was going to marry. They’ve never stopped celebrating.

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MAR | APR 2019 | 57

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MAR | APR 2019 | 59

JANELLE&RACHEL Janelle Heideman and Rachel Schneewind Janelle Heideman and Rachel Schneewind planned their wedding the same way that they launched their relationship: by filtering out the unimportant to focus on what really matters. When Rachel stumbled upon Janelle’s online dating profile, she was most struck by a single line: “It was something along the lines of, ‘By the way, I’m trans, and if you can’t handle it, don’t bother me,’” recalls Rachel. She was struck by Janelle’s proud forthrightness in the often-toxic environment of online dating, where issues like sexual racism and transphobia are still too common. “I liked the attitude,” says Rachel. “Life is short!” laughs Janelle. A spark was lit, and their story began to unfold (IRL) — from a first coffee date to, eventually, sharing a home. That’s where they were when Rachel finally, and suddenly, felt the courage to propose. She

60 | BOSTON SPIRIT

wasn’t prepared, but she couldn’t let the moment pass her by. “We were sitting in bed, the Sunday after Thanksgiving, and I said, ‘Will you marry me?’” says Rachel. Directness and authenticity again paved their way. “I didn’t buy a ring ahead of time, I didn’t go to some fancy setup and have somebody secretly taking pictures from the bushes. I was just like, ‘If I don’t say it now, I’m never going to have the nerve.’” Janelle’s answer was immediate: “Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!” When it came to planning their ceremony and reception, they started by sorting the emotionally significant from the superfluous. Rachel says that while boning up on wedding-planning books, they came across one especially helpful question: “Off the top of your head, what do you most want from your wedding?”

Once more, filtering helped things take form. The answers were easy: friends, family, and fun. “It didn’t have to be fancy, I just wanted the maximum number of people I loved,” says Rachel. They focused their budget on building a flush guest list, and chose the recently renovated Holiday Inn Boston Bunker Hill for its easy parking and convenience to public transit, musts for out-of-town guests and those with mobility issues. For outside vendors, they refined their search by asking members of their Boston queer community for recommendations of inclusive, embracing businesses. “I was fairly anxious,” admits Rachel. But they were able to identify supportive vendors like Fiore’s Bakery, a popular spot in their queer-friendly Boston neighborhood of Jamaica Plain. Fiore’s crafted a strawberry pie for the brides and mini-cupcakes for the guests, who included a number of folks from the local LGTBQIA+ community. One attendee called the event, “the

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queerest wedding she’d ever been to,” says Rachel. There was diverse representation on the faith front, too. They had two officiants: a Pagan priest, representing Rachel’s spiritual path, and a Unitarian Universalist minister, whose approach was more accessible to some guests. The ceremony included a handfasting, a Celtic-rooted ritual in which couple bind their hands together with ribbon (the origin of “tying the knot”). Janelle and Rachel also jumped over a broom, a tradition with folk roots in both Africa and the British Isles. It was challenging to find a first-dance song that made sense for same-gender couples, but they landed on the Carpenters’ “Top of the World.” The old standard

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“Drink to Me Only with Thine Eyes” served as a guest singalong, and loved ones played roles in other ways: one of Rachel’s niblings (a preferred genderneutral term for children of siblings) played the violin. By forgoing unnecessary frills to include more friends and family, they made their special day truly unforgettable—and unabashedly their own. Their biggest tip for others? Focus, and filter. “You need to let go of what’s really not that important,” says Rachel. “That actually becomes a process of learning what really is important.” For Janelle, three words sum it up: “Follow your heart.”

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SEASONAL Weddings STORY Scott Kearnan

No two couples are the same—and no wedding should feel like a cookie-cutter experience. Honor the uniqueness you and your true love share by thinking outside the box when it comes to venues, vendors, and other elements that will make your matrimony into something really marvelous—and most important, yours. From an over-the-top overnight package in Vermont to a pre-ceremony boot camp that will whip you into gown—or tux-ready shape, here are some of the more interesting options to add to your agenda.

PHOTO Isabela Martignon

Treat Yourselves to Luxury at Equinox One of the most exceptional resorts in Vermont is celebrating a milestone anniversary with two extremely different, yet equally exciting ideas: a free wedding giveaway, and one of the most lavish getaway packages you’ve ever encountered.

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The Equinox Golf Resort and Spa was founded in 1769, two full decades before the Green Mountain State even achieved statehood. To commemorate its 250th year, the picturesque property is encouraging couples who get engaged on site to share their experience on social media using the hashtag

#EquinoxCelebrates250. One lucky twosome will be selected to win a complimentary wedding ceremony, inclusive of the facility fee, champagne toast, and bridal suite. The offer will also be extended to lovebirds who book a renewal or anniversary celebration with 20-plus guests. Then again, it’ll be hard to beat Equinox’s extravagant “Luxury Anniversary Package,” a partnership

with Land Rover. If you can pay the power-player price tag of $250,000, you’ll get a weekend partial buyout for family and friends, plus spa treatments for each guest and a bevy of other amazing amenities: like roundtrip helicopter rides from Boston or NYC; a customized dinner under the stars; expert-guided experiences in flyfishing, falconry, and hiking up majestic Mount Equinox; and a Land Rover off-roading adventure over an 80-acre challenge course. Plus, of course, you’ll keep the car. Of course, most couples can’t count on a complimentary ceremony or bankroll a quarter million-dollar celebration. But regardless, there’s still plenty of reasons to consider the idyllic Equinox for a wedding. Nestled in the mountains, the main resort and its sister property—the Inns at Equinox, a collection of 33 additional buildings—holds much history within their walls. Equinox has been visited

PHOTO Isabela Martignon by multiple presidents over the years, and the romantic 1811 House is actually the former home of Abraham Lincoln’s granddaughter. Today, the Equinox is a favorite for weddings thanks to its varied venue space: from ballrooms to the Pond Pavilion, an al fresco option by peaceful blue waters at the foot of the highest peak in the Taconic Mountain range. There’s also a championdesigned golf course, soothing spa offering only-in-Vermont treatments (like a maple body scrub), and multiple

restaurants—from the Chop House, a sleek steak destination, to the Falcon Bar, where guests can canoodle over an open-air fire pit while sharing from a menu of 20 globally-sourced cheeses and chocolate truffles. And besides, if you’re going to tie the knot, picking a place in the midst of its quarter-millennium anniversary has one other advantage: awesome karma, obviously.

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More unique ways to customize LGBTQ nuptials that caught our eye

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hitched at Bride Pride, the world’s largest all-woman wedding (and renewal) ceremony. Now in its third year, and previously officiated by out comedian Kate Clinton, this mass wedding in Provincetown will be included in the Guinness Book of World Records if it brings together at least 100 couples on Saturday, October 19 — the penultimate day of the annual Women’s Week. Register by September if you want a chance to make history as a couple; either way, feel good that Bride Pride will make a donation to Cyndi Lauper’s True Colors Fund, supporting LGBTQ youth. More: rouxprovincetown.com/bride-pride

SET A HIGH BAR for creativity by serving your wedding guests handcrafted beer and wine you made yourself. At Saltbox Kitchen Brewery, a suds-making sibling of nearby Saltbox Farm in quaint Concord, Massachusetts, visitors can now [CONTINUES 69] 66 | BOSTON SPIRIT

Make Your Own History at Asa Waters Mansion John McElroy II is dragging a 200year old mansion into 2019. The Asa Waters Mansion in the small, quaint town of Millbury, Massachusetts is an indisputably beautiful and historic property. Built in 1826 for its wealthy namesake, a successful gunsmith, the mansion eventually became a stop on the Underground Railroad, according to McElroy. In more recent years, the storied mansion, which is listed on the National Register of Historic Places, has been used primarily for special events like weddings. And for good reason: The Georgian Colonial mansion — which sits on lovely, landscaped grounds in the pretty Blackstone River Valley — is gorgeous and stately, just as impressive today as when it was first constructed. But when McElroy arrived as the mansion’s new executive director two years ago, he realized there was an untapped opportunity to widen the property’s appeal — and make it clear that the Asa Waters Mansion was going to build on its progressive legacy

by being a proudly LGBTQ-friendly venue for weddings. “The man who built the mansion was ahead of his time, an abolitionist who felt strongly about helping people and put his life and reputation on the line,” says McElroy, recounting elements of the mansion’s Underground Railroad-related history. “I think it’s really meaningful that, 200 years later, his home is still being opened to people who might be rejected somewhere else. Connecting to that is really special.” As his first act of bringing contemporary queer energy to the historic property, McElroy organized a drag brunch that initially raised eyebrows – and more importantly, interest. It was a sellout, thanks to appearances by Worcester- and Providence-area queens like Kandi Dishe. Next, McElroy is organizing the mansion’s first-ever LGBTQ wedding show on June 12 at 6 PM, an evening mixer that will bring queer couples together with LGBTQ-owned or supportive vendors.

“We want to do a show where people know they’re welcome and can be 100-percent comfortable,” says McElroy. The mansion has experience in hosting LGTBQ weddings, and McElroy made sure that same-sex couples were included in a recent photo shoot showing off the marvelous mansion as a truly unique venue — something that LGBTQ folks, especially, ought to appreciate. “We’re challenged on a daily basis to think outside the box and think creatively,” says McElroy. “The mansion is a very different kind of venue. It’s not a country club ballroom. It’s truly a piece of history that guests will talk about and remember.”

asawaters.org Ros Kav Photography

C O U NTRY SO P HI STI C ATI O N Nestled among the idyllic Green Mountains in Manchester, Vermont, The Equinox provides an enchanting backdrop for your wedding celebration. Our resort showcases several indoor and outdoor spaces from 20 guests to 350 guests with view. Whether you’re hosting a lavish dinner or an intimate gathering, our team will ensure that it exceeds your expectations. We’ll meet your every need with the grace and the professionalism you expect from Manchester Village’s most treasured hotel destination. Recently engaged? Come visit us with a complimentary tour and 50% off your facility fee if you book by March 31, 2018. For more information, contact Rachel LeClair, Professional Wedding Planner at 802.362.7854

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Make Your Own Wedding Bands at Stonybrook Fine Arts If you like it, you put should put a ring on it. How about one you made yourself? When it comes to finding the right wedding ring, there is no shortage of fancy jewelry stores all over New England. Family heirlooms great, if you’ve got them. And the Internet is flooded with impersonal retailers touting low-cost convenience. But if you want to wear something that feels totally unique to your special twosome, you should swing by Stonybrook Fine Arts, a metal arts and sculpting school in Boston’s Jamaica Plain neighborhood. There, the expertled classes include recurring workshops specifically designed to help loving couples craft their very own wedding bands.

The studio, founded in 2005, has lots of experience working with LGBTQ couples, says managing partner Anne Sasser. She adds that no prior experience in metalworking is necessary; Stonybrook experts guide lovebirds through the whole process.

Wedding band-making workshops are typically held on weekends, and last about four hours. Ring prices range from $675 for silver bands to $1475 for platinum bands. White, 14K and 18K gold options are also available, and all prices include two “practice” bands in copper

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create and brew custom recipes to yield 2.5- or 5-gallon kegs for their wedding or special event. (The picturesque farm makes a perfect location, too.) Over in Dorchester, the waterfront Boston Winery gives visitors a chance to participate in the wine-making process themselves, and choose a membership that lets them draw up to 288 bottles from the batch throughout the year — and stock that open bar. More: cateringbysaltbox.com; bostonwinery.com.

SAY “I DO” in a ceremony with an officiant who truly understands equal love and shares the spirit of inclusivity. April WardStanbrook, a Brockton, Massachusettsbased Justice of the Peace who bills herself as the “Offbeat Officiant,” has extensive experience marrying LGBTQ lovebirds. But unlike other J.P.s, who run a bit dry, Ward-Stanbrook brings a pop of playful personality—not to mention, bright pink hair and cool tattoos—that queer couples will certainly appreciate. She’s also an ordained minister in the Universal Life Church, and can perform ceremonies in the Bay State and Rhode Island. More: apriljp.com

or silver, so you’ll be able to perfect your sculpting form before moving on to your final material. (Engagement ring-making workshops are available too, and Sesser says that the school also hosts bachelorette welding and metal casting parties.) Who knows, maybe you’ll discover a new talent worth developing. Burgeoning artists can always check out some of the school’s other offerings, including multi-week workshops in mold making, figure sculpting, and more. But it’s these unique wedding band-crafting classes that make Stonybrook most unique. Sasser says that couples receive a bottle of champagne to celebrate the completion of their handmade creations, and Stonybrook’s building also houses Project TransAction, an

artisan maker of leather goods— belts, suspenders and other accessories in rich colors and edgy patterns—with a following in the local queer community. So you may walk away with even more of your wedding outfit figured out. (Need something for the honeymoon? Project TransAction also makes adult leather accessories under the moniker Dirty Darlings.) Barely-single ladies and gents with Beyoncé-level budgets can certainly choose to splurge anywhere on a ring for their betrothed, but Stonybrook’s bands are competitively priced and come with a unique experience that couples will treasure forever. You can put a ring on that, but not a price tag.

stonybrookfinearts.com.

ELOPE on a

private island right off the coast of Maine. The Inn at Cuckolds Lighthouse is an 1892-built station on an Atlantic Ocean island, now used as two-suite luxury lodging for the ultimate romantic escape. The stunning locale offers a “private island elopement” package that accommodates up to six people on the island, and includes a lobster bake, wedding cake, and bouquet. The ceremony will even be officiated by the property’s captain, who also offers boat tours of Boothbay [CONTINUES 70] MAR | APR 2019 | 69

[FROM 69] Harbor. Leave wedding-planning stress on shore — and dive into matrimony with a splash, just the two of you. More: innatcuckoldslighthouse.com

TIE THE KNOT IN YOUR BIRTHDAY SUIT at Frog Meadow, a men’s clothing-optional bed and breakfast in serene southern Vermont. The idyllic property, a charming country locale with mountain views and gorgeous gardens, is close to Rock River, site of a storied gay nude beach. And it tends to attract guests seeking new ways to explore their sexualspiritual identity through workshops like “heart-centered touch retreats.” (A buy-out would be a heck of a bachelor party.) But best of all, co-owner Scott Heller is a Universal Life Minister with plenty of on-site officiating experience. So leave the worries with your clothes: at home. More: frogmeadow.com START YOUR RIDE AS A MARRIED COUPLE

at one of the most unique venues in the region: the New England Carousel Museum in Bristol, Connecticut. The fanciful facility, originally an 1837-built factory, houses a collection of over 100 ornate, antique carousel horses — plus a 200-seat ballroom with a stunning Venetian crystal chandelier. (And yes, you can take wedding photos during indoor carousel rides.) The effect of the place is so stunning and special, it’s even hosted celebrity nuptials: Pop star Paula Abdul held her East Coast reception here. If you want to make your spouse “forever your girl” (or guy), here’s a venue with wonderful whimsy. More: thecarouselmuseum.org

LOOK YOUR BEST in a custom wedding dress from Seam Couture, Providencebased designer Harper Della-Piana’s bespoke brand of handmade gowns. Della-Piana has lots of experience working with lesbian and genderqueer clients to create high-fashion and vintage-inspired dresses, plus perfectly [CONTINUES 72] 70 | BOSTON SPIRIT

Fit Up for the Big Day with Endurance Pilates & Yoga Ask anyone who has been married: wedding ceremonies go by fast. The photographs that result, on the other hand, last forever— which is why many couples work hard to get in shape for their special day. If you’re going to preserve the moment, it might as well be one you’ll want to look at again. Enter: “Endurance Brides,” a boot camp–style fitness program from Endurance Pilates in Boston’s South End. The idea is to help newlyweds feel their happiest and healthiest, says Julie Erickson, the studio’s owner. To do that, Endurance Pilates offers personalized instruction—for future brides, grooms, and their wedding parties—that helps clients achieve their unique goals. “Sometimes I want to put bumper stickers on the back of wedding gowns that say, ‘Body by Endurance Pilates,’” says Erickson. Endurance will work with couples, together or individually, to devise personalized fitness plans. Pilates is a particularly effective discipline because it encourages the development of long, lean musculature, says Erickson. The exercise emphasizes the kind of slow, controlled movements that re-sculpt the body and lead to lasting results. Pilates training also builds an instinctive, constant engagement of core muscles that lasts well after class instruction has ended, says Erickson, whose studio also teaches yoga and barre. When

you’re walking down the street with a sense of general activation in your abdominals, a certain clench that suggests “you’re about to take a punch in the gut,” you know you’ve retained some of those important principles of Pilates that help clients wear their wedding day finest—say, backless gowns or super-svelte tuxedoes— without fear or self-consciousness, says Erickson. Most betrothed clients begin their fitness journey about a year before the wedding date, she adds. And classes cover wide ground for the groom, bride or wedding party. (Boot camps as bachelorette-bonding activities are increasingly popular.) But Endurance makes a point to focus specifically on fitness outcomes that will help in wedding-day ways. For example, Erickson says that improved posture is a particular area of emphasis; clients want to look their tallest, leanest, and most poised for picture-taking. Pilates is helps get them there. It also helps couples who enroll in boot camp together to step into their next chapter with a sense of camaraderie and commitment to health. “It helps couples start out on the right foot together,” says Erickson. “They’re committing to a lifetime of fitness together,” says Erickson. Repeat after us: I do.

For more info on Endurance Pilates and its wedding boot camp fitness program, visit endurancepilatesandyoga.com.

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GO CRUISING one last time—on Boston Harbor, that is. Charles Riverboat Company has five vessels that hold up to 145 people for sails around the harbor or the Charles River. And they’re able to accommodate weddings, giving guests the unique opportunity to marry unmoored, with a covered canopy deck, dance floor, premium bar and more. The fleet is pretty fantastic, from the Valiant, a 97-foot yacht with a wicker-furnished bar and salon inside, to the Lexington, a 75-foot, two-level paddleboat. Before you drop anchor, take one more spin together on the sea. More: charlesriverboat.com

April Ward-Stanbrook, Justice of the Peace MA, RI

Frog Meadow NEWFANE, VT

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Asa Waters Mansion MILLBURY, MA

Inn at Cuckolds Lighthouse

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CULTURE Exhibition STORY Loren King

Woman in bicycle bloomers, 1900, by Raphael Kirchner

Coat from Rad Hourani’s Unisex Couture Collection #9, Paris, fall/winter 2012

A Second Skin Major MFA show “Gender Bending Fashion” focuses on nonbinary style “You can never be overdressed or overeducated,” Oscar Wilde famously quipped. While many envy Wilde’s flamboyance and wit, fashion—whether stylish or subdued—has long been an important form of self expression for LGBT people. It’s a way to communicate who we are to ourselves, each other and to the world. Looking at fashion through the prism of gender transgression is a subject as big as the powdery blue Valentino dress Lady Gaga wore to this year’s Golden Globes (with her hair dyed light blue to match). But the Museum of Fine Arts Boston is embracing the task, mounting a major, multimedia exhibition, “Gender Bending Fashion,” that opens March 21 and runs to August 25. This exhibition looks across a century of haute couture and ready-to-wear fashion that has challenged rigid, binary definitions of dress. Though it looks back, the exhibit is driven by the contemporary

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moment, says Michelle Finamore, the show’s curator. “One of the things that inspired me to think about this as a subject is what is happening in the world of fashion as it reflects changing mores, these changing ideas of gender especially for millennials and Generation Z where they are thinking about gender as a spectrum rather than something that’s completely binary-driven.” The exhibit will feature more than 60 boundary-pushing designs, presenting the work of groundbreaking contemporary designers including Rad Hourani, Jean Paul Gaultier, Alessandro Michele for Gucci, Palomo, and Rei Kawakubo in the context of historical trends. These include the garçonne look of the 1920s, a decade that Finamore likens to the modern era in terms of boundary-pushing. “Women started dressing in male style attire; even the body type became a boyish ideal [with] hair bobbed, often so close — a shingle

Tuxedo worn by Marlene Dietrich in the 1930 film “Morocco” bob. Women were entering the workplace; going out to cocktail parties and bars; they are becoming independent, participating more in sports and appropriating men’s attire.” The second era that saw a seismic shift in gender bending fashion was the “peacock” revolution of the 1960s and early ‘70s when “unisex” clothing became a thing, blurring the lines between male and female, notes Finamore, and men started to wear more color and patterns, blouses, caftans and jumpsuits. Though women have not stopped wearing pants since trailblazers like Marlene Dietrich and Katharine Hepburn made them fashionable, Finamore admits that skirts and dresses for men have caught on only fleetingly. Despite some social media enthusiasm for the “utlilikilt,” basic attire other than pants for men remains at best a niche. “Gender Bending Fashion” is a multimedia spectacle that also features video of runway footage, film clips, photography, some paintings and illustrations, a collection of vintage postcards, and record albums since the show pays particular attention to the influence of the music industry and musicians who broke gender barriers with their personal fashion style

Suit from Ikiré Jones’ “Born Between Borders” collection, spring/summer 2014

such as David Bowie and Jimi Hendrix and current icons Lady Gaga and Janelle Monae. “Janelle Monae was always on my list to include. She came onto the scene with a real gender bending style and maintained it after coming out, which was a key moment for her, professionally,” says Finamore. Lady Gaga’s LGBT anthem “Born This Way” will be featured on the exhibit’s mix tape that will play throughout the galleries. The show will feature a pair of Lady Gaga’s shoes, designed by Newton native and School of the Museum of Fine Arts graduate Thom Solo who has outfitted style icons from Gaga to Katy Perry with dazzling footwear. Solo is accessorizing the show’s mannequins, says Finamore, and the Lady Gaga shoes will have a special place in a separate room called “the fashion and gender lab” where visitors can explore ideas raised in the show and share opinions. “Lady Gaga’s shoes are in there because in terms of creative expression and her own perspective, she has been inspirational

for people who don’t fit in the box,” says Finamore. Besides celebrities and haute couture, however, it was important to Finamore and her team to connect couture with the real-life experiences of people. So they put out a call through social media to any Bostonians “who dress with some gender fluidity” to send images to the MFA. “We got great response and great images and these are incorporated into the exhibition,” Finamore says. It may sound simplistic, but the exhibit underscores the notion that fashion statements are highly individual and deeply personal. “Many people like wearing a uniform. But many want to dress in a way that expresses who they are or how they see themselves,” says Finamore. “Collections come out every day and conversations around gender expression, the language about gender, changes every day, too. I knew [the show] would be the start of a dialogue. It is not the final word, but it will encourage people to address the subject and, hopefully, be enlightening for people.” [x]

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CULTURE Music STORY Loren King Fred Hersch. PHOTO Steve J. Sherman [OPPOSITE] Fred Hersch. PHOTO Vincent Soyez

2017’s Five Best Memoirs by both the Washington Post and The New York Times. Hersch, on tour in Germany, conducted an interview via email with Boston Spirit about Whitman and “Leaves of Grass.” [BOSTON SPIRIT] What about

‘Leaves of Grass’ made you consider it for this composition? How did you choose the Whitman texts—it’s such an epic work, how did you approach it?

[FRED HERSCH] To me, Whitman

Setting the Great Gay Poet to Music Jazz legend Fred Hersch performs ‘Leaves of Grass’ in concert Fred Hersch is a renowned jazz composer and pianist; a twelve-time Grammy nominee who has regularly garnered jazz’s most prestigious awards since he burst onto the scene. But one can imagine even he may have been daunted by the idea by setting to music the poetry of Walt Whitman, considered the inventor

of free verse, jazz’s literary equivalent. Hersch in 2003 composed a breathtaking celebration of Walt Whitman’s “Leaves of Grass,” orchestrated for two voices, to great acclaim. ‘Leaves of Grass” was selected to open the 2017 Jazz at Lincoln Center season at the Appel Room. Hersch and his orchestra, accompanied by

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vocalists Kurt Elling and Kate McGarry, will perform “Leaves of Grass” on March 23 at 8 p.m. at the Berklee Performance Center. In his 2017 memoir “Good Things Happen Slowly” Hersch recounted his life in music as well as his struggles and triumphs as an openly gay, HIV-positive jazz musician. The book was named one of

was a master improviser with words, unique in all of literature. There are no rhymes in most of his poems, but they have an internal rhythm that made me think that they would be hospitable to a jazz-influenced setting. I started with a copy of the Deathbed Edition of Leaves of Grass and went through the book from beginning to end and marked (in pencil) poems, parts of poems and titles that resonated with me. It was not an academic project so I condensed some poems—and didn’t feel compelled to set poems just because they were well-known. Then I typed out everything I had marked, printed them out and cut them out with scissors and put them on the floor of my studio. All of this took about nine months (with some help in the sequencing from dramaturg Herschel Garfein) before I wrote any music. [SPIRIT] How long did you work on the project? [HERSCH] I composed the music

at The MacDowell Colony in Peterborough, NH in one month, January of 2003. I

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orchestrated it in February and hand-copied the parts for the March 2003 premiere. [SPIRIT] Since Whitman is such a historical gay figure, were you struck by any particular passages in ‘Leaves of Grass’ that are deeply personal/sexual/ erotic in language and content? [HERSCH] When I first read

Whitman in college (at New England Conservatory), it blew me away that he was writing so openly about “manly attachment” in the mid-late 1800s. But I did not use any of the “gay” poems—the Calamus Poems. I used part of the title of my favorite one, “When I Heard at the Close of the Day” as the inspiration for an instrumental piece “At the Close of the Day.” And I used a line from his poem “The Sleepers” that refers to men sleeping “lovingly, side by side, in their bed.” I am an out gay jazz musician, for sure, but all of that is in the background. I wanted to use his amazing words to express big thoughts and emotions that I feel myself.

[SPIRIT] Some passages are sung and some are spoken. How did you decide to arrange it that way? [HERSCH] Each of my

approaches to individual sections of text was unique to that text. At some point, I just thought it would be a nice change to have the poetry recited without music. Likewise, I didn’t feel that it had to be “jazzy.” Certainly

it is a piece that is performed by great jazz musicians, but the improvisations are minimal and each member of the ensemble only gets one solo feature. It’s all about the words and the emotions and philosophy that they convey—and my idiosyncratic approach to them. [SPIRIT] Is the band the same one you have been touring with and how long have you worked with these musicians? [HERSCH] Most of them I have

worked with for a long time and in many contexts. Many members of the band are on the 2003 recording of the piece, and bassist John Hébert has been a member of my working trio for 10 years.

[SPIRIT] What qualities do Kurt

Elling and Kate McGarry, who will be singing ‘Leaves of Grass’ in Boston, bring to the songs that is important to you as the composer? [HERSCH] I wrote Leaves

with Kurt Elling in mind. I knew him, loved his singing and he is himself a poet and lyricist. (He refers to the piece as a “jazz oratorio.”) Both he and Kate have great diction (very important for obvious reasons), amazing musicianship and sing with deep feeling. They have performed this piece together well over a dozen times and they each are perfect for it. [x]

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CULTURE Cinema STORY Loren King

Scene from the Guatamalan film “José”

Creating Art and Creating History Wicked Queer, Boston’s LGBT Film Festival, turns 35 Wicked Queer, Boston’s annual LGBT film festival, is celebrating its 35th year milestone, making it one of the oldest continuously running LGBT events in the country. But instead of growing weary in middle age, Wicked Queer stays relevant by continuing to push boundaries. Thanks to a young, all-volunteer staff of devout cinephiles, the festival remains committed to showcasing diverse international films that provide both longtime and new audiences with same thing: an authentic queer film experience. “I love that Wicked Queer exists. As a filmmaker, a film fan and a queer, I love the opportunity to share stories of our community,” says Shawn Cotter, the festival’s new executive director. Longtime executive director James

Nadeau earlier this year passed the reins to Cotter who has been involved with Wicked Queer for more than eight years, serving as director of programming and operations manager. Nadeau says he’ll remain involved with the festival in other capacities such as fundraising and advising. “I wanted this year to reflect Shawn’s vision,” says Nadeau. “We have a good team this year and that gave me the confidence to step away. A festival should have some turnover so [films are programmed] through different eyes. It has to be relevant.” Running March 28–April 7 at locations around Boston including the MFA and Emerson College’s Paramount Theater, the festival’s opening night film and party will take place at the Brattle Theatre. The festival was still being

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programmed at press time, since both the Sundance and Berlin film festivals (in January and February) often provide key films for Wicked Queer, but some high-profile titles are already in the mix (see sidebar). The festival has drawn a consistently loyal audience all of its 35 years. Nadeau, whose “day job” is teaching film at MIT and Lesley University, notes that the numbers increased after 2013, the year of the Boston Marathon bombing, when organizers moved Wicked Queer up to March/ April from May. “It shifted the demographic because the festival no longer interfered with finals and graduations. Our audience got younger instantly,” he says. Because of the mix of older and younger viewers, Cotter says that, at 35, it’s important

for Wicked Queer to move forward and look back at the same time. He has programmed a retrospective screening of Marlon Riggs’s landmark 1989 experimental documentary about black gay culture, “Tongues Untied,” which will be followed by a discussion. “The film is as powerful and provocative today as it was 30 years ago,” says Cotter. “What does it mean to view the film through a contemporary lens? That is the power of cinema.” It’s also the strength of the festival that it showcases a variety of films and genres, with many filmmakers in attendance. Besides features and documentaries from around the world, Wicked Queer screens numerous programs of short films that audiences cannot get anyplace else. “I’m a short filmmaker myself so I know how hard it is to get into festivals. I want to support filmmakers as much as possible and give them a place to show their work, to create art and create history,” says Cotter. “This is a space to celebrate queer culture.” Also new to the team this year is programming director Katie Shannon, who had

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Gay All Over: Wicked Queer brings the world to Boston Director Li Cheng, who emigrated to the US from China, made the film with nonprofessional actors in a neorealist tradition after conducting extensive interviews with gay and marginalized youths across Latin America. The film follows gay, 19-year-old José (Enrique Salanic) who lives with his mother (Ana Cecilia Mota) in a tiny apartment in Guatemala as they struggle to make ends meet. As his mother peddles sandwiches at street markets, José directs motorists to fast food restaurants from a busy intersection. When he falls in love with Luis (Manolo Herrera), a young construction worker from coastal Izabal, José is forced to deal with his sexuality that he’s kept hidden from his protective mother. The film portrays gay love blossoming in the shadows of a repressive culture where crime, violence and strict religious beliefs are formidable obstacles. Wicked Queer will also screen many powerful documentaries this year. “Every Act of Life,” written and directed by Jeffrey Kaufman, is a lively, moving portrait of American playwright Terrence McNally whose landmark 1995 Tony Award-winning “Love! Valor! Compassion!” featured a group of gay male friends grappling with loss in the age of AIDS. The prolific McNally,

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T:9.875”

One of the hits out of last year’s Berlin Film Festival, Marcelo Martinessi’s debut feature “The Heiresses” from Paraguay is among the much-anticipated titles in this year’s Wicked Queer. It’s about a lesbian couple, the older Chela (Ana Brun) who shares her well-to-do home with her girlfriend Chiquita (Margarita Irún). Their staid life is suddenly upended when a bank debt forces them to sell off possessions. As Chela begins to part with furniture, silverware and paintings, the losses threaten her sense of identity. But when Chiquita is sent to prison by a court order and Chela is left to grapple with living without her partner, the losses become emotional as well as material. Forced to re-define herself, Chela finally starts to open up to who she really is and what she ultimately wants. The film quietly and subtly examines marriage, love and loyalty as it delves into Chela’s psychological, sexual and identity issues through her crisis. As her house empties out day by day and she sheds her past, she seems ready to embrace new friendships and a new sense of her place in the world. “José,” awarded the Queer Lion at last year’s Venice Film Festival, was the first Guatemala and Central America film ever presented at the prestigious festival.

volunteered with the festival for several years before taking over the programming role from Cotter. Shannon’s love for Wicked Queer is personal: she had two short films in the festival in 2003. Shannon also directed the feature documentary “113 Days” (2013) which followed the women’s lacrosse team at her alma mater, Stonehill College, during the 2012 season. Shannon earned her MA at Emerson College and now teaches at Stonehill besides making films. In booking films for Wicked Queer, says Shannon, “Nothing is censored. We want a variety of films that give something to everyone.” One of the reasons that Wicked Queer has thrived for 35 years is the commitment of volunteers who meet regularly, view hundreds of submissions, discuss and swap favorites with one another, and who often take on greater responsibilities with the festival. “We begin [planning for Wicked Queer] in the summer. We’re always thinking about new ways to engage the audience. We want to give them authentic films that tell the stories they can’t see anywhere else,” says Shannon. Both Shannon and Cotter say a diverse slate of films is crucial to a well-rounded event but they are partial to comedies simply because queer comedies are harder to find. “We’re trying to be more joyful and celebratory. We are 35, right?” says Cotter. “We are striving for inclusion and a place for everyone. You can watch stuff at home. But there is no comparable experience to watching in a group and having a collective emotional response. It’s magical.” Nadeau agrees. “What we show is of paramount importance to a lot of people,” he says. “To sit and watch a queer film with others is a transformative experience.” [x]

wickedqueer.org

Ana Brun and Margarita Irun in the Paraguayan film “The Heiresses”

who wrote about LGBT lives in many of his plays, helped launch the careers of Nathan Lane, F. Murray Abraham, Audra McDonald, Doris Roberts, Patrick Wilson and Joe Mantello who are all interviewed in the film, along with other stage stars from Christine Baranski to Chita Rivera. An early champion of marriage equality, McNally talks about his Texas childhood; his early relationship with writer Edward Albee; the violent protests for his play “Corpus Christi; surviving lung cancer; and how he found lasting love with his now-husband, producer Tom Kirdahy. From Australia is writerdirector Sue Thomson’s “The Coming Back Out Ball Movie” which follows a group of older LGBT people invited to attend

a ball celebrating their gender and sexual identity. Many of the attendees are facing the complexities of aging and isolation, so the event is the chance to be among other LGBT seniors and to share with them love, acceptance and the simple joy of being alive. Danish director Helle Jensen’s “Meet Miss Rosewood!” follows this self-described transgender-terrorist on the New York hardcore performance scene. The film is about the wild side of Miss Rosewood, but it also explores her life backstage, where she goes by the birth name of Jon Cory, and has a family who is trying to understand the stage persona through which Jon lives out his dreams and fantasies.

Director Caroline Berler’s “Dykes, Camera, Action!” is an irresistible trip down memory lane for any film buff. It looks at queer women’s cinema from the mid-twentieth century through today, with clips that include Barbara Hammer’s “Superdyke,” Rose Troche’s “Go Fish,” Lisa Cholodenko’s “High Art,” Cheryl Dunye’s “The Watermelon Woman” and Desiree Akhavan’s “Appropriate Behavior.” Those interviewed who provide social and cultural commentary include B. Ruby Rich, Jenni Olson and Sarah Schulman who discuss with humor and insight their experiences seeking women like themselves on screen and how they’ve expressed their own queer identity through film. —LK

MAR | APR 2019 | 81

CULTURE Dance STORY Loren King

The Dream, the Drive, the Desire Boston Ballet dancer Paulo Arrais is ready to embrace new challenges Boston Ballet principal Paulo Arrais is having a high-profile season. The out dancer will star as Franz in the Ballet’s production of Balanchine’s “Coppélia” in March and later this spring he’ll make his debut as a choreographer in a major Boston Ballet production, “Rhapsody” with a score by George Gershwin. A native of Goiania, Brazil, Arrais began ballet training when he was 11. After studying at the Paris Opera Ballet School and the Royal Ballet School in London, he spent three years at the Norwegian National Ballet, before coming to the United States in 2009, first to join Alonso King’s LINES Ballet and then, a year later, Boston Ballet. Within

just two years, Arrais became a principal dancer, starring in Boston Ballet’s productions and appearing as a guest artist for companies around the world. But he happily calls Boston home. “I love Boston. Boston Ballet has allowed me to grow and find my voice as a dancer and creative artist,” he says. Although Arrais has danced the role of Frantz before — “I like Balanchine’s modern approach of continuous movement and attack,” he says — he’s eager to inhabit it in the Boston Ballet’s new production of “Coppélia,” a romantic comedy of mistaken identity with a score by Léo Delibes. It runs March 21–13 at the Boston Opera House.

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“I like to challenge myself; my skills are better now, so I can take [the role] to the next level of acting of musicality and partnering,” he says. “Frantz is a flirt. He’s like the cutest boy in the village; he flirts with everyone and gets away with it because he’s so charming. The relationship with the audience is interesting in this version. I get to flirt with the audience, too, and let them connect with the ballet.” That accessibility he adds makes Coppélia a “great ballet for kids.” At 31 and in fine shape, Arrais is not ready to step away from leading roles anytime soon. But he’s eager to bring his experience and knowledge to the creation of his own dances. In 2017 he staged an original

ballet, “Castle,” for Boston Ballet’s BB@home program. “Rhapsody,” which runs May 16–June 9 and consists of five ballets by choreographers who push the boundaries of dance, will be the showcase for the world premiere of Arrais’s “ELA, Rhapsody in Blue,” his first work for the Boston Opera House stage. “ELA” has deep personal ties for him. “ELA” means “she” in Portuguese, Arrais’s native language, and his ballet is inspired by his mother and aunts who were powerful figures in Arrais’s young life, he says. “I have a lot of femininity in me and I am proud of it. I have done psychoanalysis and the more I dig into the past, the more I see strong

[ABOVE]

Paulo Arrais in John Cranko’s “Romeo and Juliet.” PHOTO Liza Voll courtesy of Boston Ballet

[OPPOSITE, LEFT]

Paulo Arrais in Wayne McGregor’s “Obsidian Tear.” PHOTO Rosalie O’Connor courtesy Boston Ballet

[OPPOSITE, RIGHT]

Paulo Arrais. PHOTO Liza Voll courtesy Boston Ballet women and the huge influence they had on me.” For “ELA,” Arrais has choreographed a corps of 15 men, who will function like a flock of birds, he says, and a single ballerina. It represents Arrais’s own journey and “how much the feminine in my life has helped me develop a sensitive man. It taught me to be compassionate. Especially now with the political climate, I am turned off by toxic masculinity. Enough is enough.” His dance’s focus on a strong, central woman is connected to the #MeToo movement, he says. “Women all over the globe are saying, ‘No, No, No.’ It’s a delicate subject to talk about. It takes, for lack of a better word, balls to come forward and when someone does come forward, it helps all women. “We have a duty as artists to reflect the human crisis we are living through. That goes beyond the walls of the Boston Ballet,” he says. “If I have the platform of nine shows at the Boston Opera House, why not do something that matters?”

George Gershwin’s jazzinfused score was selected for the program by Boston Ballet artistic director Mikko Nissinen. Arrais admits it took him some time to warm up to Gershwin’s classic score. “The music is theatrical. But I heard emotions in it; chaotic moments” which fit with his depiction of a woman’s life and her choices. “The most important thing to me is the emotion in the piece,” he says. Arrais says that working with some of the most influential choreographers in ballet, including William Forsythe, Sol Leon and, especially, Boston Ballet resident choreographer Jorma Elo, gave him the confidence to impart his own vision for dance to a company. Ballet, he says, requires “the dream, the drive and the desire.” A choreographer must also have “the poise necessary to lead a room, to understand egos, and to bring out the best in each dancer.” [x]

bostonballet.org

MAR | APR 2019 | 83

CULTURE Music STORY Loren King Kirill Gerstein

Coming Home Boston roots run deep for classical superstars Kirill Gerstein and Thomas Adès Pianist Kirill Gerstein, a major concert artist who performs all over the world, considers Boston his “American hometown.” “It is the first place I came to in the states; it’s where I studied and where my

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parents still live,” says Gerstein, who was born in Voronezh, Russia and as a child taught himself to play jazz by listening to his parents’ extensive record collection. He arrived to Boston at 14 to study at the Berklee College of Music — the youngest

student ever to attend the prestigious school. Acclaimed jazz musician and longtime Berklee teacher Gary Burton “was one of main mentors and orchestrated my coming from Russia to study,” he says. “My mother came with me when I went to Berklee because I was just 14 and the college said it would make an exception and take me as a student but somebody had to come watch over me. My mother, being a musician, came first and my father followed later.” Gerstein’s roots in Boston grew deeper after completing his Berklee studies in three years. “Very quickly I met Ralph Gomberg, the legendary soloist with the Boston Symphony Orchestra,” says Gerstein of the BSO principal oboist who died in 2006 at 85. “He was my first connection to the classical world of Boston’s music community and this is how I ended up with Tanglewood in summers and essentially my first contact and exposure to the BSO as well.” Gerstein’s affiliation with the BSO has thrived as his career flourished on the international concert stage. He’s played with such prominent European orchestras as the Czech, Munich, Rotterdam and London Philharmonics; in North America, recent engagements include performances with the New York Philharmonic; the Philadelphia and Minnesota Orchestras; and the St. Louis, San Francisco, Atlanta, Baltimore, Detroit, Indianapolis and Montreal symphonies. Gerstein is the featured artist for three concerts with the BSO on March 7, 8 and 9. Composer Thomas Adès, appointed BSO Artistic Partner through 2019, will conduct the program of Liszt, Tchaikovsky and the world premiere of his own composition written especially for Gerstein. In his new role with the BSO, Adès will conduct the orchestra in Boston and at Tanglewood, perform chamber music with the orchestra players, and lead the summer Festival of Contemporary Music. The London-born Adès, renowned as both a composer and a performer, works regularly with the world’s leading orchestras, opera companies and festivals. He’s also a film composer who wrote the acclaimed score for the 2018 biopic “Colette” starring Keira Knightley as the

celebrated 19th century French author who pushed gender boundaries. Adès and Gerstein’s BSO concert program includes Franz Liszt’s “Mephisto Waltz No. 1” which depicts a scene from Nicolaus Lenau’s 1836 poem “Faust” in which Mephistopheles plays demonically on a fiddle during a wedding. There’s also Tchaikovsky’s emotionally intense and magnificently orchestrated Fourth Symphony, completed in 1878 which represents the culmination of a traumatic period in the composer’s life; and the world premiere of Adès’s Concerto for piano and orchestra. Gerstein and Adès will also perform a two piano concert together March 15 at NEC’s Jordan Hall for the Celebrity Series of Boston. Their program for this concert includes Claude Debussy’s “En blanc et noir” and “Lindaraja”; Igor Stravinsky / Dmitri Shostakovich’s “Symphony of Psalms”; Witold Lutosławski’s “Variations on a theme by Paganini”; Adès’s Concert paraphrase on “Powder Her Face”; and

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Thomas Adès. PHOTO Brian Voce the crowd favorite, Maurice Ravel’s “La Valse,” with both pianists showcasing their virtuosity on the keys. “One puts these programs together as a sort of dinner menu,” says Gerstein. “It’s stuff we’re interested in playing and has certain threads … We are fond of Ravel, so that’s there, and Stravinsky’s Symphony

of Psalms has a Boston connection, too. Stravinsky was commissioned to write it by the BSO” in 1930 by conductor Serge Koussevitzky to celebrate the 50th anniversary of orchestra. “Tom and I have a rich history together,” says Gerstein who has collaborated with Adès since about 2006. Gerstein performed the Adès’s composition “In Seven Days” which they recorded in 2012 and reprised last summer Tanglewood. The pair also performed the two piano program there. “The two piano concert was an idea we conceived in Boston,” says Gerstein who recalled that Adès told his friend that he wanted to write a piece specifically for him. “He said, ‘I want to write a proper piano concerto for you’ as if the piece we were doing wasn’t proper,” Gerstein recalls with a laugh. “And, six years later, here we are.” [x]

bso.org, celebrityseries.org

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Calendar Dinnerfest Auction Victory Programs is a multi-service nonprofit that works to address myriad issues: homelessness, the opioid epidemic, mental illness and more. But the name of this annual benefit nods to the inception of the Boston Living Center—now part of Victory Programs—as a series of community service dinners that offered care and comfort to those living with HIV/AIDS. Dinnerfest has become a major foodie draw for its silent auction, which features dozens of dining experiences culled from top restaurants around the city. You’ll also find hors d’oeuvres, a JetBlue airfare raffle, and a chance to rub elbows with industry VIPs like Elle Simone, the first black woman to join the cast of the hit show “America’s Test Kitchen.” WHEN

WHERE

HOW

Sunday, April 7

City Winery, Boston

vpi.org

The Men’s Event & The Dinner Party Break out the penguin suits, the cocktail dresses, the rainbow feather boas—and of course, the dancing shoes. It’s time again to fundraise for Fenway Health, America’s largest LGBTQ-focused health care organization, at these annual soirees that attract A-list social scene types, queer health advocates, and hand-shaking politicos too. Eat, drink, dance and—go ahead!—splurge on some silent and live auction items, knowing that your bid will benefit Fenway patients who need and deserve access to quality, culturally competent healthcare. And if that doesn’t convince you: one more glass of bubbly might! WHEN

Saturday, March 9 (Men’s Event), and Saturday, April 6 (Dinner Party) WHERE

Boston Marriott Copley Place HOW

mensevent.org, womensdinnerparty.org

Beacons of Light 2019 MassEquality has played a pivotal role in advancing LGBT equality in the Commonwealth and beyond. But even in a true-blue state like Massachusetts, the national political climate has many concerned that hard-fought rights remain in jeopardy—so show your support for this vital organization by attending the Beacons of Light benefit. It includes a cocktail reception, seated dinner, and awards ceremony honoring the noteworthy luminaries who are making a difference in preserving the LGBTQ community’s victories—and building a future filled with many more. Shine on, and let’s keep making history. WHEN

Thursday, April 25 86 | BOSTON SPIRIT

WHERE

HOW

Courtyard Boston Downtown

beaconsoflight2019. wordpress.com

‘Clairvoyance’ Diana Oh is a lot of things. She is queer. She is Korean-American. She is a performance artist. And she is clairvoyant—at least, as asserted by this one-woman show that sees the hyper-perceptive artist offer up her genre-jumping original music and journal entries in a celebration of self-knowledge. Named a top LGBTQ influencer by Refinery29, Oh recently made waves with “{my lingerie play},” a feminist series of public installations starring the artist in her underwear. We can’t claim to see the future, but we’re pretty sure this badass boundary-pusher has a bright road ahead. WHEN

WHERE

HOW

Wednesday, April 24– Sunday, April 28

Oberon, Cambridge

americanrepertorytheater.org

NUNCH: The Nun Brunch Spending Sunday brunch with nuns wouldn’t normally sound like a blast. (What are we supposed to feast on, communion wafers and red wine?) NUNCH, however, is an excellent way to cap off the weekend. The Boston Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, the Commonwealth convent of the international network of religious-drag activists, will host a special brunch at Club Café to distribute $7,000 in community grants funds to deserving nonprofits; proceeds from this event, meanwhile, will support next year’s awards. Besides brunch food, there will be two hours of live entertainment featuring comedians, musicians—and of course, delicious drag. WHEN

WHERE

HOW

Sunday, March 3

Club Café, Boston

clubcafe.com

Boston Gay Men’s Chorus: ‘Raise You Up’ We all need a lift right now. Find it when the Boston Gay Men’s Chorus presents “Raise You Up,” featuring Cyndi Lauper-penned selections from the Broadway musical “Kinky Boots.” They’ll be joined by Todrick Hall, the YouTube star-turned-Broadway veteran who previously portrayed Lola, the towering drag queen star of “Kinky Boots.” The Chorus will also perform familiar pop tunes— and the powerful 15-minute piece “Seven Last Words of the Unarmed,” a stirring and dramatic composition that uses the final words of seven African-American killed by police. From the buoyant cheering of show tunes to somber reflections on a final breath, “Raise You Up” is a promise of support through song. WHEN

WHERE

HOW

Saturday and Sunday, March 16 and 17

New England Conservatory’s Jordan Hall, Boston

bgmc.org

MAR | APR 2019 | 87

Amanda Palmer: There Will Be No Intermission Tour Presumably, you shouldn’t plan for a bathroom break during Amanda Palmer’s tour supporting her new album, “There Will Be No Intermission.” Not that you’ll want to tear yourself away. The electrifying bisexual artist, who first came to notice as one-half of the dark cabaret act the Dresden Dolls, gets deeply personal on this latest record, covering confessional territory related to “abortion, miscarriage, cancer, grief, and the darker sides of parenthood,” according to Palmer. “Intermission” is a multimedia project, accompanied by an art book that should make for one fantastic souvenir from an assuredly stellar show. WHEN

WHERE

HOW

Friday, April 19

Orpheum Theatre, Boston

amandapalmer.net

‘Cabaret’ Atrocities rarely announce themselves. They often encroach quietly and incrementally, unnoticed until the once-unthinkable is recognized as a frightening new reality. “Cabaret” captures that. Set in 1931 Berlin, it watches the downfall of the Weimar Republic and the rise of the Nazi Party through the horrorstruck eyes of American writer Cliff Bradshaw, English cabaret gal Sally Bowles, and the omnipresent emcee of the decadent Kit Kat Klub (famously played with gender-bending glee by Alan Cumming on Broadway). As racial division and authoritarianism gain traction in America, “Cabaret” feels timelier than ever. But “Maybe This Time,” it’ll be different. WHEN

WHERE

HOW

Saturday, March 30– The Footlight Club, Jamaica Plain Avfootlight.org Saturday, April 13

An Evening with David Sedaris Taste of the South End When it comes to dining, Boston’s South End has generally been one of the trendiest (and tastiest) parts of town. If you’re looking for a chance to graze among all the gourmet delights, here’s your chance: Taste of the South End, a fundraiser for AIDS Action Committee. Over 40 restaurants, including sexy steakhouse Boston Chops, Venetian wine bar SRV, and creative Cuban cuisine specialist Doña Habana will dole out delicious dishes while guests sip specialty cocktails and bid on exciting silent auction prizes. You’ll support the work of a vital organization while also narrowing down your picks for next weekend’s dining reservations. It’s a win-win, really. WHEN

WHERE

HOW

Tuesday, March 19

Cyclorama, Boston Center for the Arts, Boston

tasteofthesouthend.org

From “Naked” to “Me Talk Pretty One Day,” the works of American humorist David Sedaris have continually managed to amuse, engage, and illuminate. His self-deprecating style and openness in discussing life as a gay man have especially endeared him to LGBTQ audiences. And Sedaris’s latest tome, “Calypso,” collects essays that address issues like middle-age and mortality, all as the author decides to buy a beach home on the North Carolina coast. Steal some time to spend an evening with Sedaris when he makes a swing through New England states to share stories—and book signings, too. WHEN

Tuesday, April 9 (Providence), Wednesday, April 10 (Boston), and Thursday, April 11 (Stamford) WHERE

Veterans Memorial Auditorium, Providence; Symphony Hall, Boston; and Palace Theatre, Stamford, CT HOW

davidsedarisbooks.com

SCENE Sports PHOTOS Keith Sliney/Boston Celtics, Outvets, Marc Davino

Boston Celtics Pride Night TD Garden | Boston | January 9, 2019

The Celtics hosted their first (hopefully) annual Pride Night, presenting Steve Harrington with a “Heroes Among Us” award for his contributions to the LGBT community. The team invited Outvets to present the colors and an openly gay singer to perform the National Anthem. The Green Team performed in Celtics Pride shirts and a big Pride flag circled the court numerous times. Outside, the TD Garden rainbow lights lit up TD Garden. That evening, the Celtics beat the Indiana Pacers 135-108.

SCENE Gala PHOTOS Cheryl Richards

HRC New England Gala Seaport World Trade Center | Boston | November 17, 2018

One of the largest LGBTQ fundraising events in New England, the 37th annual Human Rights Campaign’s New England Dinner brought together nearly 1,000 snappily dressed guests working toward full LGBTQ equality and civil rights. Each year, the event attracts individuals from across the country for a festive evening featuring a cocktail reception, silent auction, elegant dinner, live entertainment, and thoughtprovoking, notable speakers—this year’s included Mass. Attorney General Maura Healey, Sen. Elizabeth Warren and Boston Mayor Marty Walsh.

90 | BOSTON SPIRIT

MAR | APR 2019 | 91

SCENE Conference PHOTOS Stevie Crecelius, Karon Wilson and Trans Club of New England

First Event Conference Best Western Royal Plaza Hotel & Trade Center | Marlborogh, MA | Jan. 30–Feb. 3, 2019

The annual First Event Conference brought together the transgender and gender nonconforming community, loved ones, allies and supporting professionals for five days of fun, education and connection-making. Expanded programming helped make 2019 the largest First Event ever, with about 1,000 attendees and featuring over 150 workshops, including tracks focusing on transmasculine, transfeminine, trans people of color, transgender youth and families, and transgender wellness. Among four dozen vendors and sponsors included DCF seeking foster homes for LGBTQ youth and BAMSI offering free HIV/HCV/STI testing. Additional highlights included the annual fashion show featuring 40 transgender and gender nonconforming models of all ages, the Love Disco Ball, a job fair hosted by the Mass. LGBT Chamber of Commerce and a rousing keynote by transgender rights and prison reform activist CeCe McDonald.

Trans teen and parent

Keynote speaker CeCe McDonald and chair Cheryl Katon

Co-chair Bree Sullivan

Co-chair Michelle Hirsch

Political leader Mason Dunn

Singer-activist Nicole Talbot

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Ball Host Athena Vaughn

SCENE Networking PHOTOS TDM Photography

Transgender Jobs Fair First Event Conference | Marlborogh, MA | February 1, 2019

Major sponsor Sephora

The Massachusetts LGBT Chamber of Commerce held its first annual jobs fair at the First Event Conference this year. More than 16 companies committed to building a diverse workforce and actively recruiting for a wide range of professional positions participated at the fair, among them: Eastern Bank, Hanover Insurance, Liberty Mutual, Harvard Pilgrim, Blue Cross Blue Shield of Massachusetts, MassMutual, Seyfarth Shaw LLP, Brown Brother Harriman, PTC, Northeastern University, Thermofisher, Vertex, Tufts Health Plan, TD Bank, Trip Advisor and Jet Blue.

Therapist Diane Ellaborn

DCS Foster Care

The Closet Thrift Store

MAR | APR 2019 | 93

SCENE Business PHOTOS TDM Photography

Founding Members Meeting 50 Milk Street | Boston | January 23, 2019

The Massachusetts LGBT Chamber of Commerce held its Annual Founding Members Meeting. The organization promotes economic growth and viability for LGBT-owned and allied businesses, corporations and professionals throughout the Commonwealth. They do this through advocacy, educational and collaborative efforts. For more, visit http://malgbtcc.org.

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SCENE Networking PHOTOS Courtesy MLGBTQ Bar Association

LET’S DANCE!

Mass. LGBTQ Bar Association Winter Party Maggiano’s Little Italy | Boston | January 17, 2019

LGBTQ and allied legal professionals gathered for a night of winter warmth, reconnection and networking at the Massachusetts LGBTQ Bar Association’s annual winter shindig. It was a night of good food, good company and great times. The event was generously sponsored by the law firm Seyfarth Shaw.

www.mochadj.com INFO@MOCHADJ.COM

CODA Storytelling/Song STORY Scott Kearnan

Tough, But No Sob Story Fashion icon Isaac Mizrahi recounts life story in pages and on stage Fashion icon and “Project Runway: All Stars” judge Isaac Mizrahi strips away all artifice in his new memoir, “I.M.” and its accompanying cabaret-style show, “I&ME,” which comes to Boston’s Wilbur Theatre on Tuesday, March 5. The night of song, storytelling, humor and heart covers vulnerable territory: from growing up gay in his small Jewish community to his struggles with weight and selfimage. He opened up to “Boston Spirit.”

the assignment to find a person in show business and interview them. It could be anyone. I set my sights on the fabulous Gwen Verdon. She was appearing in a show that had just opened on Broadway called “Chicago.” I’m talking fifty-fucking-years ago. I stood outside that theater and waited for that lady and she gave me an interview and it was fabulous. And that was the beginning of everything, that interview.

[SPIRIT] People assume the fashion industry is totally gay[SPIRIT] Why’d you feel brave enough friendly. Is it? Or were there now to share your story as a memoir? obstacles you encountered? [ISAAC MIZRAHI] This is how I work on everything, from It might have been much collections to shows to harder for me if I was straight, writings: like a pregnant lady, trying to get jobs in the fashion going “I forgot how horrible it business. ...When I was a kid, is.” She convinces herself it’s if you were gay, it was just not horrible, she gets into it, much easier to get a job in the and there she is, nine months fashion business. Not because later, screaming on the table. you were giving sexual favors, That’s a great metaphor. Here but because you know more I am ready to publish this the politics, you know more thing, and I’m so nervous. The the creative agenda. That was a bravery isn’t in writing it, it’s in long time ago, and things have publishing it. I know the story, changed, and I’m sorry if that and it was a great catharsis offends anyone. But that was writing the story. But it wasn’t the truth. scary, I didn’t have to be brave to do it. I just had to be diligent [SPIRIT] Was it hard to work in the and honest and hard-working. fashion industry as someone who had issues with his own weight? [SPIRIT] You’ve met and worked [MIZRAHI] It was a terrible lesson with many celebrities. Is there in a lot of ways. There is this anyone that really would have hierarchy of what beautiful amazed your younger self? men are, and what beautiful [MIZRAHI] When I was literally women are. I wasn’t this 13 and I started at a performing beautiful man. I was a fat kid arts high school, on the first who lost all this weight in high day of class we were given

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k.d. lang in concert. PHOTO Matt Duboff

school. When I was young and working for Perry Ellis, there were a lot of beautiful men and women in and out of that studio. And there was this crazy pecking order. We felt like hired help around them. I don’t exactly know what the challenges are for young people working in the fashion environment now, but that was one of the challenges for us: the understanding that the beautiful people ruled and we were their servants. And it did damage. It definitely did some damage. [SPIRIT] I can only imagine. [MIZRAHI] But the thing is, I

never want it to be a sob story. In my book and show, I have to tell you about the fact that I was bullied. I have to tell you about the fact that it wasn’t easy for me as a kid. But I also have to tell you about the fact that I was extremely resilient, something I got from my mother. I never minded a good fight. I was okay defending myself against bullies. What’s funny is, it never hurt me to be bullied about being effeminate. What hurt me was being

bullied about being fat. Being bullied for being feminine was almost like a badge of honor. [SPIRIT] What’s the one thing you hope people take away from your show? [MIZRAHI] I think that if any

of our problems are going to get solved, we have to learn how to communicate and how to tolerate each other’s good-natured foibles. If I get your pronoun wrong, I apologize. Because that has to stop. But you also have to understand, like a Border Collie is conditioned to chase after sheep, for literally thousands of years (we were conditioned that) there were two sexes. ...Especially now, in Trump’s America, everyone has to manage anger a little bit better. I have only loving intentions. That is the truth, darling, that is the truth. I have intentions based in justice, that’s it. The communication, the conversation has to be elevated to a more humorous and less angry place. [x]

thewilbur.com