The Bournemouth Rock - issue 6

Man scales bank building

Thai lands in Bournemouth Page 10

Jonathan Beal

Reports that a man had scaled the Natwest building scaffolding in central Bournemouth triggered a police cordon around the square area of town. The cordon extended from the Debenhams department store towards Richmond Hill and Lush cosmetics store last thursday night. Armed response units were thought to have been on hand, together with a police negotiator who accompanied a citizen into the cordoned area.

The alarm was raised at 9.45pm, provoking the cordoning off of the area and the arrival of a fire service supervisor on the scene. The surrounding bus routes traversing Gervis Place were also disrupted; being moved towards Westover Road as replacement services became available from beside the Odeon cinema. As onlookers stopped cars to enquire about the disruption, officers were persistent in offering no further information.

At first, it was thought that the incident may have been a gas leak on the square due to the presence of at least two fire engines. Later this was proven incorrect as locals travelling back from a fashion show at Beale’s department store were updated on the situation unofficially.

Turn to page 3

The Bank Holiday weekend played host to the third annual Thai Food Festival in Bournemouth Square.

Thousands of visitors enjoyed authentic Thai cuisine, entertainment and, for a change, some sunshine

Holograms: Dead or Alive?

The 2012 Festival Special

Page 15

Page 19

Your special Cherries end of season pull-out

Inside

2 news

Thursday 10 May

| The Rock

Bike thefts from compound Sam Thomson NEWS EDITOR

THURSDAY MAY 10, 2012

News

Councillor’s EDL Twitter storm

9

Opinion

Supermarkets cause obesity

17

The secure cycle compound outside Kimmeridge house SAM THOMSON

Features

A summer break for every budget

26

Sport

Pearce’s Team GB squad

30

Tweet beat

“

America wakes up to the news that France has sacked its socialist President, and elected a Communist. @ianvisits

Email

”

jdennirocks@gmail.com

Facebook

Bournemouth Rock

Twitter

@BournemouthRock

Three bikes have been stolen from a secure bike lock-up on Talbot Campus in recent weeks, according to security staff. Opportunistic thieves are following staff and students into the compound, which is surrounded by a high metal fence and protected by a key-card entry system. Cyclists are charged a £5 deposit for the key-card, in the hope that their bikes will be more safely secured.

William Mitchell, 18, left his £350 bike locked up inside the compound over Easter: “When I returned, all that was left were a couple of bits of the bike and part of the lock. I got a crime number, but the police said they wouldn’t be interested unless there was CCTV footage. The head of security told me the footage from that period had been deleted and there was nothing else he could do.

“He added that my bike was the third to be nicked in recent weeks.

Security said that over Easter they are

massively understaffed in terms of security and that’s partly to blame as to why my bike was stolen.

“He told me criminals would follow a person into the compound, wait, nick the bike they want and wait for someone else to come in and then follow them out. I think the whole system is flawed.”

The Rock approached the university for comment, but no reply was received.

Martin Handford, chairman of the Bournemouth University Bike Users Group, explains that not all of the blame for bike thefts is with the criminals: ”These bikes probably didn’t have a very good lock on them. Really, people should be locking their bikes up with high-quality, gold-standard D-Locks. They are much cheaper to buy in the student shop than they are elsewhere.

“The university has spent tens of thousands of pounds into putting lock-ups in place, but you can’t stop people from getting into them.

The British public are notorious for holding doors open.”

University under redevelopment Tazz Gault

ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR Redevelopment will be underway during the summer to update many parts of Bournemouth University.

Plans show that a new canopy will be installed over half of the St Michael Cobham library courtyard, in addition to improved seating in the outside area.

Poole House will also be relandscaped to create a central courtyard to provide students with a social space, as a glass canopy is due to be installed. From this, shelter will be provided between the rear of Poole house and the Poole House lecture theatre complex.

There is currently very little sheltered outdoor seating across the Talbot Campus.

“This has been requested by students,” confirmed SUBU

President, Toby Horner.

“SUBU is pleased that the university is investing heavily into the student experience.”

The university will also be building a disabled access ramp at another entrance at Kimmeridge House, one of the newest learning facilities on campus.

Also scheduled to be refurbished are the SportsBU facilities which will include a new Fitness Training Zone, a dance studio, a large aerobics area and refurbished sports hall.

“The work will all be completed in time for the new academic year in September and key BU events such as open days, exams and Festival of Design and Innovation have all been considered too,” said Scott Bellamy, Student Communications manager at Bournemouth University.

This week, the university will begin work to raise awareness with students about the up and coming

changes to get opinions and to let more people know.

“We will start the student focussed communications this week,” confirmed Scott.

“We have also engaged with student groups throughout the journey to ensure the work we are

going to do is the right stuff.

“The work is due to begin on Monday May 14” said Scott.

There are other building works planned to improve the experience on campus for students and staff including work at the Landsdowne campus which are near completion.

already making a name for themselves within the very competitive web design market.

After a series of small university projects at the start of their first semester, the four, David O’Donnell, Tom Allison, Joe Benton and Andy Joyce, quickly established that they had a variety of different skills and abilities that complimented each other, so they decided to form 8bit Lemon Design and Brand Agency.

When asked how they got started, David O’Donnell stated:

“An opportunity to produce some designs and concepts for the charity ‘Against Malaria’ came to light, so we jumped at this chance, as this was for such a good cause, whilst also giving us the opportunity to put to practice what we had learnt.”

Since then, 8bit Lemon has grown from strength to strength, adding two new members to the team - Lee Giles and Louie Babb - and boasts projects on five different continents including many local businesses.

Last Monday saw the well

anticipated release of their own website www.8bit-lemon.com, and when asked why this has only just been released Tom Allison replied: “Although we knew we needed our site to go live, we had commitments to our customers that took, and will always take, priority over our own needs.”

The 8bit site is already receiving accolade for its quirky design and content from their colleagues, as well positive posts from hundreds of their followers on Facebook and Twitter.

The area outside Poole House is being relandscaped SAM THOMSON

The Web just got a whole lot fresher

Drew Sleep

ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR Over the years Bournemouth University’s Internationally renowned Media School has produced students that are awarded some of the most prestigious positions within the media industry. Last October four first year Interactive Media Students took the bull by the horns, and are

news 3

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

Chaos caused as man scales Natwest building

Police presence in the town centre provoked a lot of extra attention from passers-by JONATHAN BEAL

Jonathan Beal Continued from page one

As the Lola-Lo nightclub began to gather crowds queuing for entry, an initial concern of safety was raised by the volume of students and clubbers on Richmond Hill by students and doorstaff. It is thought that the presence of armed officers may have been due to the emergency services lack of clear information surrounding the condition of the man in question.

At one point, the man is clearly seen climbing the scaffolding in a blue hooded jumper.

Students attested to hearing aggressive shouts from the man in question as he continued to climb the buidling. Onlookers were largely positioned beside

cordons that did not directly face the Natwest building which may potentially have provided dangerous publicity and unwanted public interest towards the man; whose motives were largely unclear.

An armed officer, together with who we believe to be a police negotiator were seen shouting up to the man, who had reached the fifth level of scaffolding which was set alongside the building. Despite the public nature of the incident, police officers would not offer any further information throughout the incident and course of events.

One ladder that allows access to upper areas of the scaffold structure was seen to be uncovered within a fenced off area.

The next day on Friday evening, another man attempted to climb the same scaffolding causing the police to cordon off the area once more.

4 news

Thursday 10 May

| The Rock

Can you hear wedding shells?

Editorial Team Editor in Chief Julia Denni Chief Executive Sam Watt

News Editor Sam Thomson Deputy NE Harriet Rose-Gale Assistant NE Drew Sleep Assistant NE Tazz Gault Opinion Editor Oliver Hill Features Editor Vikki Hutton Assistant FE George Underwood Sports Editor Jonny Byrne Assistant SE Andy Mitchell Chief S Reporter Tom Bennett Chief Sub Maisie Buchan Assistant Chief Sub Will Richards Picture Editor Sophie Outen Head of Design N Lee Giles Head of Design O Charlotte Blake Head of Design F Carrie Mok Head of Design S Rachel Currie Brand Designer Tom Allison Letters to the editor must be signed (including the course of Bournemouth University students, the working title and school for staff members, company name, or home address for individuals outside BU).

Prior to the publication, letters will be verified for authencity by the editor.

Anonymous letters will not be published. The editor reserves the right to edit all letters in regard to libel law, length, taste, grammar and punctuation.

Letters to the editor: jdennirocks@gmail.com

Advertising:

bournemouthrockads@gmail.com

Rachel Currie

Bournemouth has made history by being the first beach to hold a wedding ceremony directly on the sands.

Not only that, but the whole event was broadcast live on TV. Kate Smith and Frazer Seed won a competition organised by ITV1’s Daybreak to be the first to get married on a beach in the UK. Viewers watched the lucky couple tie the knot at 8am on Friday April 27, under the shelter from the blustery 25mph wind and rain, in a decorated marquee.

Beach Weddings Bournemouth arranged the nuptials after being granted a license to hold legal civil ceremonies on the beach last year.

The company has built a special beach hut ‘chapel’, which will stay on the beach until October during the peak wedding season.

Pippa Bunce, the company’s marketing director, said they have received a large amount of interest: “We’ve got a lot of weddings booked for 2012. We’re taking bookings now for 2013 and have even had a couple of

enquiries for 2014 so it’s all looking very positive.”

Being Great Britain, the rain made a few appearances on Kate and Frazer’s big day, but white umbrellas were on hand to keep the bride and her guests dry as they made their way to the aisle.

The event drew a small crowd of passersby, who braved the 8-degree cold and showers to catch a glimpse of the bride and groom.

Despite the weather, Kate, 23, and Frazer, 31, made a brief appearance after the ceremony to thank the onlookers for stopping by and posed for a few photographs.

Accommodation at the four-star Highcliff Marriott for the couple and their guests was included in the prize, as well as flowers, a cake, the bridal gown and a fully dressed marquee that held up to 30 guests.

The couple, from Preston, Lancashire, held their wedding breakfast at the cliff top hotel after the ceremony, using the West Cliff Lift as transport for them and their guests.

Another surprise was arranged for the newlyweds, as they were given a luxury 13-day cruise, stopping off around Italy and Spain, for their honeymoon.

Frazer proposed to Kate while she was recovering in hospital from a

The happy couple and family members on the beach RACHEL CURRIE near-fatal car crash seven months ago.

She suffered a fracture to her lower back, five broken ribs, a broken right femur and two metatarsals.

This made the day even more special for Kate, a supervisor at Starbucks, who is still recovering from her injuries.

Postal workers complain of ‘ruff’ treatment Sam Thomson NEWS EDITOR

Royal Mail are asking dog owners to be more responsible with their pets, after an increase in attacks on their staff in Bournemouth.

In the past year, there have been eleven incidents where dogs have attacked postal workers whilst

they are on their rounds.

Dog attacks on delivery workers are all too common, and can cause severe physical and psychological trauma – a far cry from the comicbook image of the postie being simply chased out of the garden.

The Communication Workers Union (CWU), which represents 70,000 Royal Mail workers, estimate that between 5,000 and 6,500 of it’s members are victims of dog attacks every year.

Postmen are frequently threatened by canines when working

OLIBAC

The CWU launched its Bite-Back campaign, after two postal workers nearly lost limbs in two separate attacks back in 2008. The campaign aims to bring attention to the issue of dangerous dogs and push for more responsible dog ownership.

The campaign has already had some success, with new legislation being introduced in Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland to tackle the issue.

Dave Joyce, the CWU’s Health, Safety and Environment officer is spearheading the campaign, and says that current legislation on dog ownership is a real threat to delivery workers: “The Dangerous Dogs Act 1991 is one of the worst pieces of legislation to ever be committed to the statute books. There are no pro-active preventative measures to protect people from dog attacks.

“The postal service deliver to 29 million addresses, six days a week, to every private and public premises in the UK. Postal workers are committed by law to deliver mail and are offered no protection from dog attacks by criminal law.”

Last month, the government announced plans for compulsory microchipping of puppies and to close a loophole in current legislation, which absolves owner responsibility for dog attacks on private property.

However, these plans are only subject to consultation, and do not go far enough, according to Joyce:

“In April 2010, I got a personal written assurance from David Cameron to review the law, but two years on Westminster still haven’t taken it forward. We weren’t very happy with the changes that they announced, and we’ll keep pushing to get proper changes made.”

Since 2001, eleven people have been killed by dog attacks in the UK, and around a quarter of a million people are bitten by dogs each year, costing the NHS millions of pounds. Joyce says that the problem of dangerous dogs has “crept up on the nation” in recent years, but that the problem lies with the owners of dogs rather than the animals themselves: “Responsible dog owners have nothing to fear. There are 9 million dogs in the UK and the majority don’t present a problem. Good owners socialise their dogs. Bad ones don’t and they aren’t just a threat to postal workers, but neighbours, other people and children. These people are a real threat to the British public.”

Moves to tighten legislation have come under fire last week from Conservative MP, James Gray, who suggested that dog owners would be the ones to suffer. Speaking in the House of Commons, he said: “There’s a risk that not one single criminal thug who breeds illegal dogs at the moment will go tripping into the vet’s to have their puppies microchipped.”

news 5

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

Mixed opinion on Boscome plans Tazz Gault

ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR Public opinion has been split as Bournemouth Borough Council continues to redevelop Boscombe.

Some locals claim that there has been too much focus on encouraging new businesses to set up with less interest to those that have stood the test of time.

Since the economic crisis began, Boscombe has seen numerous stores close or decide to move due to not renewing their lease such as Robert Dyas, TJ Hughes, Peacocks and Argos.

An attempt to find the route of the problem has been on going, but some argue that no matter what the council do, it will still make no difference.

“I have been involved in the regeneration scheme and have gone to a lot of the meetings that Bournemouth CIC have held.

I think that until you properly fund and introduce money into Boscombe it won’t go very far,” argued Ralph Grundy, a Boscombe resident for the last 16 years.

“Its biggest problem stems from the housing as people are living on £65 a week benefits. There is no spare money to spend in shops; after they take out the £15 a week top up and £15 a week gas and electric, there’s nothing much left to live on. You know it is never going to improve when people are living like that.”

Ralph is a homeowner, a private landlord and a company director and has run his own business in Boscombe since he moved there.

“People have no chance of getting a job if they live in the BH1 postcode – the stigma of living here assumes you are a drug addict or an alcoholic, and that is not always the case,” said Ralph.

“I think Boscombe will continue to go downhill for the foreseeable future. All it has currently is a 99p store and a Poundland so no one wants to be here.”

However, owner of the company Edible Love, Angus Miller, argues that the regeneration of Boscombe is on its way to becoming a success.

“I came to Boscombe about three years ago, and although so many people have been putting down the idea of what the council are doing with a lot of places closing down, there have been a lot of newbies opening up.

“People used to say ‘what on earth are you doing living in a place like that?’ but now I can see people doing a fantastic job – Boscombe is an absolute joy to be in.”

The council state that local people and businesses are at the head of future development for new and old businesses to help keep jobs and trade local.

Tony Williams, Chief executive of Bournemouth Borough Council said that he is “delighted” that The Bournemouth Development Company has signed up to the Local Employment and Skills agreement to help “in such challenging economic times”.

The Vintage Market is also another development that the Boscombe Regeneration Partnership have worked on which has shown great success. However, a local stall owner at the Boscombe market said: “Our rent has gone up since the

Vintage Market was set up and since the council chose to focus only on new businesses. It seems harder to survive when you’ve already been surviving compared to those that are fresh faces. It’ll take more than making Boscombe look pretty to make it a success.”

Carly Earnshaw, Media and Communications Officer for Bournemouth Borough Council told The Rock she has been involved and has seen the work the Council have done for Boscombe and its surrounding areas.

“The recent bid for Boscombe to become a Portas Pilot Town demonstrates the work that

we are doing to support the existing businesses,” she said when questioned on whether old businesses are cared for as much as the new.

Charity shops have also been hit, with many on the Boscombe high street in struggle or fear of closing, including the Salvation Army shop that has already shut, and Shaw Trust, which is due to soon.

“The rent is often too high for the number of people that walk through the door. People still complain about the price, despite it being dirt cheap,” said one charity worker who asked not to be named.

“Shops come and shops go so it

affects us either way. Right now, we’re not getting the footfall that we need and we never seem to know the reasons why more shops are closing down. They may have lost their lease, I’m not sure,” said Linda Love, 60 who works at a local Boscombe charity shop.

“We are always looking for more support and for charity shops to not be forgotten about,” said Linda.

As Boscombe continues to be questioned as to whether it will improve to the extent hoped, new and old businesses will continue to work with the council to increase the footfall to Boscombe centre, and hopefully public opinion too.

Boscombe has seen numerous shop closures since the global economic crisis SALLY ROSE MCCORMACK

Bournemouth beachfront is still bare Hannah Wood

Buildings are being demolished for new attractions SAM THOMSON

Bournemouth’s sea front appears empty, despite over five million visitors each year, and ranking higher than Ibiza as one of the world’s best beaches.

Despite a handful of restaurants and basic leisure facilities, the beachfront looks surprisingly bare.

The pier, in desperate need of renovation, requires you to pay just to walk along its rotting wooden slats. Scaffolding often obstructs the scenic view and the endless lull of workmen drilling and painting can turn an enjoyable trip to the seaside into something quite strenuous.

Compared to the likes of Blackpool Pleasure Beach and even Wales’ Barry Island, whose sea front is lined with hundreds of bars, restaurants and even theme park

rides, Bournemouth beach seems somewhat inadequate.

During those occasional summer days the beach is thriving with tourists, yet for the majority of the year it looks more like a ghost town.

The current lack of tourist attractions around the beach has been argued to be aiming to keep its authentic feel, but others say it has been neglected.

Bournemouth Council told The Rock that they do not feel the lack of attractions on the sea front is a significant issue, however are making renovation plans. Council spokesperson for Bournemouth Tourism department stated: “We do actually have a Bournemouth sea front master plan for new businesses, however nothing official has been announced as of yet,” said a Council spokesperson for Bournemouth Tourism department.

“With regards to the cinema complex that dominates the landscape, plans for it to be

demolished are set to go ahead. In replacement, Bournemouth Council has made plans for an outdoor activities ground which will ‘host various shows and events’.”

Tina Hart, a resident in Bournemouth, talks about how the beach could be improved. “The seaside needs more attractions for children, perhaps a permanent fun fair or more child friendly restaurants.” She added: “I love Bournemouth sea front but admittedly there is not a lot to do in the colder months. Whereas waitress Hayley Bradley disagrees, “I think there is enough to do along the beach front. It is better to keep the hustle and bustle in town away from the coast.”

Despite, the lack of attractions lining the coast and many buildings in need of refurbishment, no doubt Bournemouth will always remain one of the most popular seaside destinations in the UK.

news 7

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

Punching for joy after 350 years Hannah Peers Bournemouth beach is a picture of seaside tradition with its amusement arcades, mile-long rows of deckchairs and century old pier. Yet nothing says seaside tradition more than a red and white striped puppet booth and cries of ‘that’s the way to do it!’

Punch and Judy shows have entertained beach-goers across the country for hundreds of years and next week, bad-tempered seaside mascot, Mr Punch, will be celebrating his 350th birthday.

Infamous for having fights with his puppet wife, Judy, and hitting a crocodile with a stick, it’s unsurprising Mr Punch has faced an onslaught of criticism and controversy. But the feisty puppet has survived the torrent of personal attacks to become the seaside icon that adults and children alike love to hate.

Paul Wheeler has previously performed Punch and Judy shows in Dorset. He said “seeing the smiling faces, the children laughing, having the older generations coming up to you saying they haven’t seen a Punch and Judy show for ages. It brings back memories for people. It’s the best job I’ve ever done.” Paul bought his first professional puppets in 2005 and has since appeared on ITV’s This Morning,

alongside Stacey Solomon, and featured on Channel 5’s Great Adventure’s with Paul Merton.

The first recorded appearance of Mr Punch was noted in the diary of Samuel Pepys on May 9 1662 at a show in London’s Covent Garden. Back then Punch was a wooden puppet on strings, known as Pulcinella, but over three and a half centuries he’s evolved into the hand puppet families are familiar with today. To celebrate Punch’s birthday The Big Grin event will take place in the Covent Garden Piazza, on Saturday May 12, to commemorate where he was first spotted. Celebrations will include performances from various puppet masters from around the world which include Japan and Australia as well as America.

One of the puppeteers making an appearance at The Big Grin is Professor Dan Bishop. He has held shows all over the world and has performed in 15 different and various languages.

“The icing on the cake has been going overseas. I’ve been to over 100 international festivals in the past 20 years,” said Dan. Punch may have faced his fair share of criticism in the past but Dan believes Punch’s attitude is the key to the puppets charm and is what makes the puppet show so well known and iconic.

“The different things that Punch was doing and the way he acts was airing people’s particular frustrations in their lives.”

University cuts carbon footprint Tayla Woodard

Bournemouth University (BU) will go green with a new biomass boiler that will reduce the university’s carbon emissions by 259 tonnes per year, adding to the collection of projects in place to make BU more environmentally friendly.

The boiler will provide space heating for Poole house and will burn locally sourced renewable woodchip as fuel, replacing 80% of the gas usage in the building.

The project is to launch fully in autumn 2012 when the boiler will be installed, reducing the University’s carbon footprint by 3%.

This is in line with the plan to cut carbon emissions by 30% by 2016.

BU’s environmental officer Amanda Williams said: “This is an exciting project and staff and students have reacted

very positively to the plans.

“This is just one of a number of carbon reduction projects that have either been completed or are under way by the University.”

The scheme will attract a government subsidy of £42,000 per annum through Renewable Heat Incentive payments, in a proposal to revolutionise the way heat is generated and used.

The boiler will be saving CO2 emissions that are equivalent to the burning of 29,036 gallons of car fuel, and will excel in energy performance levels in comparison to other similar sized buildings.

The university has been enthusiastic to implement a variety of environmental changes such as the switch to LED lighting in Dylan’s bar, mixed recycling facilities, more eco-friendly vending machines and The Student Switch Off campaign, all of which are among a number of projects contributing to the university’s carbon management programme.

The iconic puppet show Punch and Judy is remembered by people of all ages around the world PAUL WHEELER

Charity race twist Paula Torres Moneu A charity race with an edible twist has been designed by a local student.

Anna Degn Hansen, a 20-yearold student from Denmark, has decided to organise a peculiar fundraising race to help the homeless shelter situated by the side of Cranborne House, one of the Bournemouth University’s Halls of Residence.

“You basically have to run two miles, then eat a dozen donuts and after you run another two miles. Extreme-ness!” explained Anna.

The idea to do this started when Anna and her friend Michelle began to do a series of challenges to have a good time.

“We’re both a bit insane so we began by doing the cinnamon challenge [eat a tablespoon of cinnamon in one mouthful],

which we both failed at. The video was hilarious so we wanted to do a whole series of challenges and film them,” explains Anna.

This challenge in particular got a lot of attention from her friends, so she decided to create an event on facebook called ‘The donut challenge race’ to attract as many people as possible.

“The last one was just more popular than the other ones and since it’s a race we thought it’d be cool to make a day of it down by the beach. People could come cheer, there would be a classic finish line and a prize for the winner,” said Anna.

“Only after I thought about doing it for charity instead so the runners who participate get people to sponsor them for the race.

Then the money collected would go to the homeless shelter next to the halls of residence in Landsdowne, Cranborne.”

The money raised will go directly to St. Paul’s Night Shelter, with the aim of helping to

improve its facilities and make the stay of its visitors as pleasant as possible.

The race will take place on the June 3 at 12pm by the Bournemouth Pier. Everyone is invited to make the event community based and be a part of this unusual race in the name of charity.

8 news

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

Named butt unashamed Paula Torres Moneu

It’s the ultimate hangover cliché – the usual headache and dry mouth are hard enough to remedy, but student Oli Mitchell woke up with something a little more permanent.

The 20-year-old student woke up after celebrating Southampton’s promotion to the Premier League, with a tattoo of his friend’s name

on his backside.

“I have no idea why I did it, but we were celebrating and were drunk so it was just banter,” said Oli. “I was going to get ‘Saint’s on there, but then Alex suggested his name instead, so I thought, ‘why not?’ and went for it!”

The experience is also a bit of a blur for buttocks star, Alex O’Niell.

“Oli had kept it quiet that he wanted to get a tattoo, but when we found him, that’s where he was. As he is a Man United fan, I ques-

tioned why he was getting ‘Saints’ on his bum and as a joke said he should get my name. As soon as I mentioned it he thought that was a better idea,’ said Alex.

This joke has cost Oli £70 and a lifelong reminder of his friend Alex. Removing a tattoo is a hard procedure and it never completely disappears, plus besides all that it is an expensive operation.

Oli told The Rock: “When I looked at the picture I started to remember, we were so excited about

it that Alex took a picture of my tattoo with his face next to it.

“I don’t regret it at the moment, it was a laugh, but I guess I’ll get asked a lot of awkward questions by girls about this ‘Alex O’Niell person’.”

Getting a tattoo is something a person has to think through before doing it because it’s something you’ll have until you die. At least this tattoo is in a location where not many people will see it, so Oli doesn’t have to explain his story to that many people.

Bottom line: The costly tattoo of a close friends name proudly displayed on Oli Mitchell’s behind after a drunken night out ALEX O’NIELL

Weather warning has caused wildlife worries Tazz Gault

ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR Dorset wildlife sanctuaries warn that the cold weather England is expecting could put wildlife in danger.

It has been feared that May will be the coldest for 100 years after spring hit Britain unusually early.

Nigel Nelson, founder of the organisation Bournemouth Bird Rescue highlighted that there have been an increase in birds referred to them through the changing and inconsistent weather.

When asked whether there is a worry that the cold spell will cause more birds to be in danger, and whether people should be more aware, Nigel said: “Yes, yes and very much so.

“After the recent hot weather, we were expecting more than the usual amount of loss and deserted birds to come in, but then the weather reversed again. Having said that, it

always seems to be a game of swings and roundabouts,” said Nigel.

Another Dorset based sanctuary, Monkey World has also raised concern about the weather we have been told to expect.

Marketing and PR manager said: “Monkey World continually appeals for towels, blankets and bed linen as the primates use them throughout the year, although more so during colder times.”

Monkey world are still eager for more donations as they celebrate the sanctuary’s 25th anniversary this year.

The sanctuary highlight that old and used items are more than welcome as long as they are clean, but they are unable to accept anything crocheted or stuffed.

Temperatures have been predicted to drop as low as 5C with bitter winds and even snow across the country.

For more information, please visit www.monkeyworld.org and bournemouthbirdrescue.webs.com

Iran Injustice Tazz Gault

ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR A Dorset teenager hopes to raise awareness in Bournemouth by setting up a campaign to defend their right for their religion and beliefs in Iran.

Their religion, Baha’i Yaran, emphasises unity across many different aspects of other religions, and believes in the equality of men and women and that everyone deserves the right to an education and that all social and economic sectors should be unified.

University students all over the country have been protesting and trying to raise awareness for those who have been persecuted in Iran.

Shadnaz Rahimi, a Televison Production student at Bournemouth University, hopes to follow in her sibling’s footsteps and raise awareness in Dorset after her sister organised a demonstration in London.

“We would love to bring it to Bournemouth now, but it needs planning and to be worked on to give it the best impact possible.

We have ideas on the table, but we think people need to understand more before they’ll be willing to support.

“My grandfather in Iran has been in prison for seven and a half years because of his belief, and the Government there are getting away with it.

“There are currently seven political leaders who have been held in captivity for over 10,000 days and this cannot continue,” said Shadnaz, currently in her first year of university.

The campaign asks people to look at their website, canyou-solve-this.org to keep this a global issue and to get more people involved.

Shadnaz, her friends, family and other Baha’i’s will continue to work on bringing the campaign to Bournemouth.

Dorset Police top ten most reported issues

Ducks seek warmth from the plummeting tempertures DSB NOLA

Dorset Police have released a list of their top enquiries made to them. The list consists of: lost and stray dogs, drink and drug driving, missing persons, police station opening times, noise pollution, property, anti social behaviour, custody enquiries, vehicles, road traffic collisions and alarms.

Dorset police have now published on their website answers to all of these enquiries for public access.

news 9

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

Big hair, big tunes Tazz Gault

ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR A Dorset-based radio is giving people the opportunity to learn how to DJ. The internet based company, Afro*Disiac offers free access to computers and the internet, to provide learners with a safe experience at the Afro*Disiac studio.

“People will be asked what they already know and what they’re interested in learning and will be supported throughout their journey as they decide where to go next,” said Raymond Nyenje, co-founder of the radio company.

“We are unique in that we let our DJ’s express themselves creatively with no play-lists on the agenda, that way they are able to play right from the heart.”

Afro*Disiac started as an event night in London back in November 2009, which was aimed at those who enjoyed underground music.

It first came to Bournemouth in 2010 and was seen in events held at the Lounge Bar every last Saturday of the month.

“I got fed up with the nightclub politics in Bournemouth, with DJ’s being restricted from being creative on the decks,’ said Raymond.

“I teamed up with a friend, Jonathan Hibberd to create the station to help facilitate and aid the development of creative DJ’s,

presenters, artists and musicians through our active DJ network membership on the whole of the south coast.”

The radio is based in Christchurch, and provides live audio and video streaming of non-commercial music every day of the week.

As a Community Interest Company, it strives for community cohesion and relies heavily on social networking. Community Interest Companies conduct a business for community benefit, and are not purely for private advantage.

Many genres of music are involved, including reggae, SKA, 60’s, 70’s, 80’s, trance, jazz funk, hip-hop to try and attract different people from any age group.

“We want to be able to offer fans music from all genres at any given time. We had gotten fed up with commercial music being played on the radio and the constant drivel being spouted by the presenters.

Because of this, we brainstormed and worked out that people really want a station that played music you never hear anywhere else.”

“Our aim is to get people to say, ‘WOAH, where did that come from?’ as each song plays.”

There are currently on going events for people to get involved in when clicking on the events page on the website, as well as the ability to hire a DJ. It is also broadcasted through flash media players including Windows Media Player and iTunes so many people are able to take part.

Drew Sleep

ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR

Afro*Disiac is open to anyone wanting to learn the trade AFRO*DISIAC

Councillor in EDL Twitter row Drew Sleep

ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR A Bournemouth councillor posted a message on the social networking website Twitter advocating the English Defence League. Conservative councillor Sue Anderson, Councillor for the Moordown

Ward sent a message to another Twitter user explaining that the English Defence League (EDL) are the only people who stick up for the English. The tweet stated: “nobody except the EDL stick up for the English.” Cllr Anderson also tweeted another account; “@notagateway” co-run by Deepa Naik to “go back where you came from.”

The English Defence League are

Cllr Anderson has since appologised for her tweet

DREW SLEEP

Teething bead necklaces are a strangulation risk to babies

a far-right movement that opposes what it considers to be the spread of Islamism, Sharia law and Islamic extremism in the United Kingdom.

The English Defence League have become synonymous with violent protest and aggression. The English Defence League have met widespread criticism from the government, police and public.

During his election campaign, Prime Minister David Cameron described the English Defence League as “terrible people”.

The tweet has been removed from Cllr Anderson’s twitter profile and her profile picture has been removed. Louise Ann Davies from Taff’s Well, Cardiff managed to save an image of the tweet and post it on her on twitter account.

Davies’ post was then subsequently ‘retweeted’ by more than fifty people further exposing Anderson’s message.

Cllr Anderson released a statement saying: “This comment was made in haste, without thought and without understanding the

racist policies espoused by the EDL. “For both comments I apologise unreservedly. I abhor intolerance in any form.”

Cllr Anderson suspended her own membership of the Bournemouth East Conservative Association and the Bournemouth Conservatives Council Group. She said: “I have been made aware of the party’s disciplinary procedures, have submitted myself to these and will cooperate fully with their investigations into the matter.”

The Councillor’s tweet was met with controversy and back-lash which resulted in many people have called for her resignation.

The mother of four also announced that she would be referring herself to the Bournemouth Council’s Standards Board as soon as possible in response to the negative criticism she has received.

Cllr Sue Anderson’s Twitter account is no longer available.

Visitors to her profile will now see the message “sorry, that page does not exist.’

Bournemouth Trading Standards have issued warnings to parents about purchasing amber teething necklaces. The necklaces are designed to be worn by babies to calm them when they are teething.

The amber in the necklace is said to naturally help babies with the pain of teething, but the necklaces have been flagged as a strangulation hazard.

The necklaces are being sold online through auction websites as well as being sold by local businesses. Traders in Bournemouth have been warned by Trading Standards and have been advised to take the necklaces off their shelves.

David Morton, Senior Trading Standards Officer said: “These particular necklaces have been withdrawn from the market in a number of European countries as a result of the safety issues. However, we know that they are still produced in countries such as Lithuania and being sold via the Internet through a number of well-known and established websites.”

Trading Standards are warning parents not to give the necklaces to their children, as there is a high risk of choking.

David Morton said: “I would urge local residents to not purchase these necklaces and put a child’s safety at risk. We have examined these products and due to small parts they pose a potential choking hazard.”

In addition to this, necklaces can be dangerous to small children because they can catch on fixed objects.

Amber teething necklace seller ‘Amber Pumpkin’ said: “The necklace has been laboratory tested to release if excessive force is applied which ensures the highest safety.

“We insist your child only wears the necklace under adult supervision and do not sleep wearing the necklace. If used properly, they are safe and offer a natural relief from teething pain.”

Amber Pumpkin have taken the necklaces off their websites until further notice.

10 news

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

In Pictures: Bournemouth Thai Food Festival

The third annual Thai Food Festival, raising money for the Bournemouth Thai School SAM THOMSON

Sam Thomson NEWS EDITOR

A small slice of Thailand came to Bournemouth Square last weekend with the third annual Thai Food Festival. Visitors were treated to a huge variety of authentic Thai cuisine, with entertainment from Thai performance group, the Yupa Show Team and even lessons in Thai boxing.

The festival, which was raising funds for the Bournemouth Thai Language and Culture School, gave families of both Thai and British heritage a chance to meet, socialise

and explore Thai culture and cuisine.

Preserving traditions among the large Thai Community is central to the festival, according to festival organiser Piyanan Tepnarin: “There is quite a big Thai community here and it has been the Festival and the Language school are renowned by the Thai Government.

My daughter was very young when I set the school up and I thought it was important for her to be bilingual, but also to encourage Thai mothers to still speak the language to their children. A lot of people struggle because all they hear is English.”

“The council supports us and always has done – they are very good. It’s really good that they

help us at a time when there is little money.”

Fashion Student Rattana Thonthuean. 19, was perfomers taking part in the festival, as a member of the Yupa Show Team.

“We are part of the entertainment and do Thai dancing - we usually do these sorts of things in Southampton, but this is the first time we’ve worked in Bournemouth.”

Talking about keeping Thai Culture in the UK, she said: “I am Thai so I dance because it’s part of my culture and it’s good to have a laugh. I love showing people our culture as there are loads of Thai students and people who live here.”

news 11

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

Nationwide bomb scare Tazz Gault

ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR

Crisis at UCL university as students are evacuated GABRIEL POWER

Bournemouth University has warned all staff that the university is on a high-risk alert in case of a bomb scare.

On May 3, Stuard Laird, Head of Estates at the university sent out an email to all staff outlining the procedures put in place in case they are needed.

“If we received a call we would act on the advice and the support of the emergency services,” said Stuart.

This follows a number of universities over the country receiving calls alerting staff of hidden bombs on campus, all of which so far have been a hoax.

In Bristol late last month hundreds of pupils were evacuated from one of the halls of residence, and the local area was cordoned off, after an anonymous email was received.

UCL and Durham have also had recent bomb scares which were later announced as hoaxes.

“There were a lot of rumours at first that the bomber had the bombs attached and that there were gas canisters. Apparently he stormed into an office, threatening to blow himself up and then began throwing all the office furniture out of the windows. It was that point that the police took over,” said Harriet Allen, 19, a student at UCL. Laura Jacobs, 19 from Salisbury also had a similar experience at

Durham University.

“I heard some girls outside my window shouting that were was a bomb scare in the castle so they told me to leave immediately. There were really loud sirens and we weren’t allowed back for hours,” said Laura.

Stuart Laird has confirmed that Bournemouth University has not yet received a call and that “thankfully it has been a number of years since we had anything at BU as it was probably around ten years ago.

“There is obvious concern and threat for the university to consider sending out a message,” said the universities Press and PR manager, James Donald.

The origins of these calls remain unclear as investigations are still underway to trace the caller.

Netball meets vampires

Amy Dyduch

The varsity netball team at Bournemouth University has won a competition to appear in the first ever netball horror movie.

The Bournemouth University Netball Club (BUNC) earned the chance to be in Netball Sucks - a feature length horror comedy about a bloodthirsty vampire netball team - through Twitter.

Captain Madeleine Gough said the squad are “extremely excited” and admits the news still hasn’t sunk in.

“It’s literally hilarious that this is going on. We were only sort of messing about when we were tweeting and now it’s actually happening – it’s so funny,” she said.

Producer of the film Roopesh Parekh, said the Netball Sucks team are “extremely proud to have BUNC as the winners,” and added, “the enthusiasm the girls have shown for the sport is incredible.”

Madeleine, 22, admits BUNC are not sure what to expect, “it seems like it’s got quite a dark vibe to it,” she said.

But Roopesh assures the film, which has a £2.5million budget, is light-hearted and hopes it will be received well by both netballers and the general public.

“It’s the Bridget Jones of Horror Comedy. It’s Dodgeball meets Hot Fuzz. It’s what we’ve all come to love and expect from Sports Comedies. And you’re guaranteed a bloody good laugh along the way,” he said.

Georgina Townshend, writer and director of the film, is also looking

Bournemouth University’s netball team are thrilled to be part of the new movie, Netball Sucks, and can’t wait to get stuck in KAT HANNON forward to working with BUNC and was impressed by their interest towards the film.

“From day one of the competition the girls were all on board and showed great attitude and banter, which is a massive feature within the film,” she said.

After hearing they had won, BUNC were quickly contacted by Georgina regarding the next stages of their involvement with the film.

“She wanted headshots of us all, I guess to check that none of us were like The Undateables,” said Madeleine.

The 14 members of the team attended a photo shoot at Surrey Sports Park in Guilford, which gave Georgina and the Netball Sucks crew more of an idea of BUNC’s specific role within the film.

She said: ”We obviously want to give them something special, and I’m after meeting them we now know exactly what that will be.”

This is Georgina’s first feature film and after specialising in directing at the University for Creative Arts she is thrilled to be able to merge her two passions – film and netball.

She said: “All through my life, the two have seemed to combine.

I decided I wanted to be a film director, and the first feature I wrote was about netball.”

Captain Madeleine thinks the squad’s “humorous” Tweets meant they fought off competition from other netball teams. “Loads of other people tweeted as well but I think they picked us because our tweets were quite funny,” she said.

The 15-certificate movie will be filmed in South West London and Kingston, before it is then released in

May next year.

It will follow protagonist Juliet whose vampire netball team, the Dark Diamonds, abduct umpires and turn them into vumpires at the hope of being promoted to the Super League.

“Netball Sucks is about friendship, and having a good time. We can see that that is exactly what team BUNC is all about,” Georgina added.

For more information follow them @netballsucks on Twitter.

12 news

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

Meet the new Miss Dorset Tayla Woodard Local student Annabell Newman has been crowned “Miss Dorset” after competing against 60 others from the region in the battle of good looks.

19-year-old Marketing student Annabell was chosen as the winner after surviving an online voting stage, and two further stages ending with the Gala ceremony in Weymouth. Newman is delighted to have won the title.

“I was so nervous standing waiting for the results because I knew I had given it everything I had got. I thought my legs might give way at some point but then when they said my name. I felt so overjoyed and happy and proud of myself for doing it,” the winner told The Rock.

The contestants are also assessed on personality criteria alongside their overall goodlooks and charm.

“I had to have a one on one interview with the judges and they asked me various questions such as what made me enter the competition. I also had to impress them on stage on a sort of cat walk, and then we were asked a question on the spot on the stage

Students meet ‘arry Tayla Woodard

in front of an audience, so I had to be confident, clear and passionate when talking to them.”

The 12 “Miss Dorset” finalists raised £2,000 for their chosen charities, proving that the event isn’t just about being beautiful.

Annabell has already defeated 22,000 applicants for the “Miss England” competition and will compete for the title in the final heats during June against 60 other girls, all hoping to achieve the ultimate title.

“There will be lots of opportunities not only for the winner but for all of the girls in the final so it should be an amazing experience.”

Three daring Bournemouth University students met Tottenham Hotspur manager Harry Redknapp on Sunday night after knocking on his door at his home in Sandbanks.

Spurs fan Alex Hatton couldn’t believe his luck when his wife answered the door, and ‘Arry agreed to meet them after they had tracked down his home on Google maps.

“We just decided to do it on a whim because we were bored and we were shocked when we saw it was really him.”

Luke Scott asked Redknapp if he was hoping to carry on with Gareth Bale next season to which he replied: “Don’t worry mate, he’s staying with us.”

Redknapp also assured the boys that the team would finish in a top 4 spot this season, qualifying for the champions league next campaign.

The three students were pleasantly surprised at how “down to earth” Harry was considering his high profile status. Student Tom Morgan added: “Despite him being such a busy man he still showed interest in us and asked questions about University and what we are studying, he is a genuinely nice guy.”

Luke Scott and Alex Hatton met Harry Redknapp at his home TOM MORGAN

Nursing Success Poole Hospital held an annual awards evening, where a record point of nominations were awarded to fundraisers, midwifes, cleaners, volunteers and other hospital staff.

The event was held to announce those people, who, according to patient’s opinion, showed the highest standards of care, understanding, professionalism and medical skills.

Among the winners listed was Bournemouth University student nurse, Rebecca Miln, who received an individual prize for patient care.

Undergraduate nursing leader, Sara White told The Rock: “There are no words to describe how proud I am to see all the achievements and successes that we have been up to so far and, hopefully, in the future, clients will know about the high standard of BU graduates.”

Rebecca Miln is not the only person who has already stood out as a brilliant nurse. Late last month, Ian Jones, a patient from a Royal Bournemouth Hospital, sent a letter of praise to four female Bournemouth University healthcare students, saying he felt very proud and honored to have been nursed by them. He added that nothing could have been better than to the service that he recieved in 14 days while the students were in practice. In the letter he wrote: “It would be difficult not to observe, they were as good if not better than some of the professionals.”

OPINION

Editorial

Julia Denni

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

Gastric band or cream cakes?

This week’s elections have sent chills to governments across Europe. The historic results in France and Greece are worrying for politicians who advocated austerity. Is getting fit not on the programme anymore?

The shock of the results set the markets tumbling. After paying for

a gastric band, Greece has decided to order cream cakes by turning their back on rigor, that was once imposed by Germany and the European Union.

France as well decided to knock on the head the diet of austerity of conservative Nicolas Sarkozy, and opted for a softer touch.

François Hollande: a more bland choice than his predecessor and referred to as Flamby, after the wobbly crème caramel product, Hollande has conquered the voters but not yet the European leaders.

It seems that Angela Merkel has lost her right hand man that helped her impose her firm views on the direction that Europe should be taking.

The French socialist leader, reminiscence of Ed Miliband, falls into the category of politicians that lack charisma and true political character. Yet Mr. Ordinary has won against the “bling-bling” president Sarkozy who, like David Cameron, implemented stringency measures in the country. Austerity has become in France less popular than Hollande, who is now flying

on the myth and legacy of the idealised last left-wing president Mitterand.

Likewise, the Greeks have bailed out and have rejected both medicine and gastric bands paid by the EU, and would rather have cupcakes.

So, what’s to be done to get European countries fit?

The dreary diet option has clearly been discarded, as Europe seems to be fed up with rigid economy measures. Is the future for the EU and Greece stuffing themselves with cakes and treats until the reality catches them really the best option?

Perhaps the best way is to sign up to a gym while stuffing yourself with food from M&S and Waitrose, or in other words, striving for the best quality but with little compromise. It might seem like the picture perfect democracy, but Greece may end up biting its nails for the mistakes made, and France left longing for the return of Nicolas Sarkozy peculiar style.

Everyone likes a surprise, as really, there’s no fun in always knowing what is around the corner.

to 47 cases and I am told that my lovely Carrera Vulcan mountain bike is the third victim of thievery in recent weeks. On this basis I can only assume Boscombe has hideously festered into a place that makes Brooklyn, New York look like Sandbanks, Poole.

This has been the first time that I’ve been directly targeted by criminals in my life and unlike some, I wasn’t in need of a box of Kleenex and a hug from a councillor - I was angry and annoyed.

I was frustrated not just for the obvious reasons but also because it dawned on me that there is in actual fact very little we can do to stop crimes like these.

It turns out if you want to keep your bike safe in today’s world there’s very little you can do short of setting it in concrete – if an illminded felon wants something of yours bad enough they will take it from you.

Back to the economy and shock horror I’m not overly worried out the fact that we are in recession again.

Before you dismiss me as some kind of swivel-eyed madman answer me this, are you or any of your mates concerned?

I am pretty certain the answer is no. What’s more, the first quarter of the year is bound to be the weakest of all because it directly follows the festive season where we all struggle to keep a grip on our finances and become hard-up in the subsequent few months.

We are relentlessly being reminded by that violated looking panda, otherwise known as leader of the Labour Party, that growth in this country is flat lining and Balls is adamant the government has “cut too far and too fast”.

We need to show the world that

Britain is not a penniless rock in the North Atlantic and shake our debt as soon as possible. Let me illustrate this for you. It’s like losing weight

JEAN-MARCAYRAULT

opinion 13

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

The dreaded ‘R’ word Oliver Hill

Obesity

Supermarket are making you fat

17

Tweet beat

“

If you vote for Britain's Got Talent/ X-Factor but NOT for local elections - kindly go sit in the corner and question why you are here.

Email

ohillrocks@gmail.com

“

@caroline hirons

OPINIONS EDITOR You might have noticed that in this issue the Opinion section has gone all soft and arty on me. So in a bid to cure this I’m going to talk about that most depressive of words ‘recession’.

Firstly I think I’ll use some facts and figures to bring my section back down to Earth. According to the latest statistics published by the Office for National Statistics (ONS), the British economy shrank by 0.2% in the first quarter of this year making this a ‘double dip’ – for those who aren’t terribly economically minded this has nothing to do with the popular sherbet sweet.

The thing is, I knew that the UK was heading downhill again a whole day before the ONS delivered the bad news, because my beloved bike had been nicked by some immoral, pilfering yobbo. I’m sure this all sounds very Daily Mail and it’s about to get even more so.

Despite being locked up in what the university brands as its ‘secure compound’ in one of the safest and most affluent parts of the country, it was stolen over the Easter break which must mean that things are getting bad out there. This sort of crime in the BH12 postcode of Bournemouth alone has rocketed in the last few months from 28

by only eating celery. Celery isn’t pleasant to eat or terribly popular but you know it’s the only way shift the pounds.

Has the double dip recession caused a rise in crime? GEORGE TULLY

14 opinion

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

We have lost pure talent Francesca Earnshaw

I’m only 19 years of age, and am already thinking of using the phrase ‘once upon a time’ to start this. The negative type. Although I wasn’t there, this ‘once upon a time’, from what I can see, was a few decades of pure motivation, dedication, grit, passion, pursuing dreams. The ‘high’ life.

Rock ‘n’ roll - the stories of trashing hotel rooms, and chucking TV sets out of windows. Drugs, sex, volumised hairstyles, distressed denim, tattoos, cigarettes, rehab, back-to-back gigs, cutting guitar riffs, edgy magazine interviews, skin tight leathers, feathers, eyeliner… and epic, hard guitar music at the forefront of it all.

Classic rock.

Although times have changed, I still feel it should be questioned about the release of new artists into the industry. For bands like The Beatles, Black Sabbath, Deep Purple and The Sex Pistols (a tiny portion of a near never-ending list), it was gruelling hard work to achieve their positions.

Numerous new bandnames, combinations, step-ins, replacements and arguments flitted around even the biggest bands in rock, yet now? One Direction, for example, had the world come to them, and never truly chased the

world. It’s shows like the X Factor which, in my opinion, isn’t even the scout for talent it claims to be.

Fame-hungry artists flock to the show to see if they have a ‘shot’. In One Direction’s case, five individual artists were strung together, and didn’t even have to win the X Factor to earn worldwide popularity, fame and support.

Within a year they had gone from being completely unheard of, even to each other, to one of the biggest names in Pop today and to add to the shock, all they do is sing. Do they stay up until the early hours penning down the most clever of lyrics, as intricate as clockwork, venturing deep into their own hearts to convey what they wanted to at the time?

Okay, they all chipped in on a couple of songs from their album.

“The way that you flick your hair gets me overwhelmed”? No. Please.

How long would that have taken them to come up with if it was their own words, anyway?

Where’s the “I’m as free as a bird now, and this bird you cannot change” (Lynyrd Skynyrd) the “Oh well, the night is long, the beads of time pass slow. Tired eyes on the sunrise, waiting for the eastern glow” (Led Zeppelin) and the “Did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts? Hot ashes for trees, hot air for a cool breeze, cold comfort for change?” (Pink Floyd).

The lyrics you could take mental notes of. That perfect combination of words to the flicker of intensity

‘Real’ musicians like The Beatles are declining due to TV contest programmes PINEAPPLES101 from the guitars. All the hard work behind it. Where are the guitar solos that erupt through the songs, the drum solos, the visions of sweat and ache after listening?

TheUKTop40 today is a plague of auto-tune, computerised beats and, realistically, tack.

Though radio stations and TV channels still exist to honour rock, like the occasional Motley Crue or Guns ‘n Roses track creeping in amongst the new flood of metalbased artists, it still feels like true, pure classic rock is dying. The

occasional The Answer or Black Stone Cherry song will reignite the passion once felt before, but really, nobody these days can slay a guitar like Eddie Van Halen or Slash could.

I feel proud to be able to wear Aerosmith and Iron Maiden bandshirts which my dad bought at their gigs. At one time, he bought his first Alice Cooper ticket for £1.

It’s odd how Take That and Lady Gaga can be worth way over £70 at the O2 arena now, but again times are changing.Personally, I’ll never let go of classic rock, and hope to even

to reiterate the mantra of the far right: multiculturalism is bad – and I put it to you that there is no such thing as a “European culture”, nor is there a “white culture”. What does exist, I’m experiencing right now, is national cultures. I know Muslims from Turkey who, because they have spent the larger part of their lives in Britain, have more in common with the average, ethnical Brit than I, who just moved here, do. There is such a thing as British culture, and by moving here I am intruding on it.

I assure you, I am without malice; I’m not here to conquer your isles. Yet, I would be lying if I said there aren’t things I would want to change.

The fear of such change is what made Anders Behring Breivik murder eighteen year old Andreas Edvardsen, and sixty eight people with him, on the island of Utøya. Andreas, too, was a white European. Now, it would be awfully arrogant to think that every 50th Brit encourages the slaughter of multiculturalists, but it would be, of equal magnitudes, naive to think that there aren’t those who support it. To paraphrase Swedish historians

Håkan Blomqvist and Kjell Östberg: Mass murder is what makes Anders Behring Breivik unique – his views are shared by many. By definition, extremists must always exist. But in a world where today’s extremism is becoming the popular opinion of tomorrow, I can’t help but wonder to what lengths the new extremism will go. Sure, the current enemy might

pass it down to my children.

The new wave of UKTop40 individuals probably will still be taking over.

Pitbull’s lyrics disgust me now with “In Brazil they’re freaky, with big old boobs and their thongs, blue yellow and green!”

I hope one day soon the UK can wake up and make way for artists willing to bring back the strength of the time of Zeppelin where “There’s a lady who’s sure all that glitters is gold and she’s buying the stairway to heaven” would never die.

Should I feel threatened?

Robin Gustafsson COLUMNIST

Like the girl guides that so often figure in American movies, the right extremist movement has rung the doorbell of Europe, eager to sell their biscuits.

In Norway, Anders Behring Breivik is on trial for massacring some 70 socialist youths; in France, Marine Le Pen and her Front National got every fifth vote in the first round of the presidential elections; In the hung parliaments of Sweden and Denmark, governments have to bargain with the far right to get enough votes to pass legislation; and here in Britain the British National Party is gaining support, and these are just some examples.

They all have the same main goal, which could, perhaps harshly, be summarized as “to rid their birth-nation of multiculturalism”.

As a Swede among Brits, I ask you: should I feel threatened?

Five years ago, the visions of that political alignment was referred to as extremism by the common man, and sometimes still is by the media.

But it’s not extremism anymore. As more and more people realise that their allegiance lies with the ‘extreme’ right, the edge of the meaning is wearing down. Take France, where, statistically, in every family there is one member who supports Front National – making that political view de facto conventional and moderate.

On the political spectrum, left-toright, it is of course still extremely right-winged, but, as far as public opinion goes, it has become commonplace. The people have taken a fancy to the guides’ cookies. Based on the fact that in 2010’s general election 2% of votes went to the BNP, every 50th person I meet on the street wants me out of the country. Knowing that, I ask you again: Should I feel threatened?

By now I imagine people, perhaps rather annoyed, asking themselves: “What has this guy got to fear? He is European, AND he is white.”

Whilst both are true, I would like

Breivik admitted that he killed 77 people last year DMITRYVALBERG be non-western cultures. But what happens when the scope is widened and it’s realised that I, as a Swede, am as much a threat to British culture, and all other non-Swedish cultures, as any Muslim, Jew, or African.

Fearing that that day might come sooner rather than later, I ask you: should I feel threatened?

opinion 15

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

Vs Legends resurrected to perform again Jessica Long

Sam Thomson

There were gasps when the rapper Tupac joined Snoop Dog and Dr Dre at the recent Coachella music festival, even though he was shot dead in 1996.

It was all thanks to new technology which allows eerily life-like holograms to be projected on stage.

Even though it costs thousands of pounds, it was priceless to fans of the rapper who thought they would have never seen their hero upon a major music stage again.

But some say that this is unethical and these stars should be remembered for when they were living.

However, think about the huge stars that are no longer with us. The Elvis Presley’s, the John Lennon’s, they were born to perform, it is what they loved and I don’t feel they would have any objections to being in the spotlight again, even if it is in holographic form.

Since the Tupac performance, there has been rumours that the Jackson 5 will reunite for lucrative tour, with the hologram of Michael Jackson imposed on the stage to bring arguably one of the biggest bands of all time back together.

And for fans of Michael, who spent hundreds of pounds for tickets to his O2 shows in 2009, this would make up in some way for not only missing out on seeing their hero live, but also give them a chance to pay their respects in a spiritual kind of way.

This technology has no limits to where it can go. Just image if at the Olympic opening ceremony they were able to reunite The Beatles or Queen, this would definitely put an end to all the arguments of which British heroes of music should perform.

And if people don’t feel comfortable with the idea, then don’t watch. Just allow real music fans to roll back the years.

Michael Jackson and Tupac - two of the most famous late stars please the crowds SAM MATTACOTT

Rock ‘n’ Roll is a dangerous profession. It’s claimed the lives of it’s biggest and brightest. The mythology of dead musicians is something close to the heart of any real music fan. I say real music fan, not out of any kind of cultural elitism, but because I don’t know how a real die-hard music fan can feel comfortable watching a 2-D projected image of a long-dead performer appearing as-live, even if it is just a bit of fun. This has all been spawned by the appearance of a “holographic” rendition of the legendary rapper Tupac which appeared alongside Snoop Dogg at Coachella in April.

Snoop Dogg is absolutely berserk – I like him a lot – but there is something just creepy about him telling Tupac, who has been dead since 1996, to show “these mother effers what kinda party they at” only for Tupac to do exactly that (it was nuttin’ but a gangsta-party, in case you were wondering).

What if Tupac didn’t think it was a particularly gangsta party. I’ve seen Snoop Dogg live, and it was one of the least ‘gangsta’ parties I’ve ever been to. It was quite genteel, apart from the continued repetition of the n-word. My problem is that, in reality, Tupac was never properly consulted on the issue at all. The holographic Tupac cannot have any of the spontaneity, autonomy, personality or future that the real Tupac had. The possibilities for this kind of technology are limitless - but that’s whats wrong with it. The current trend for nostaligia in music has had it’s upsides - like the return of Pulp, Blur and The Libertines - but at least these people are still alive (or only just in the case of Pete Doherty).

Hendrix, Cobain, Lennon, Curtis – all of them are so revered for their talents in life, and the misfortunes that took them away. When the life of a musical legend is cut short, that spark that made them a genius dies with them. To try keep that spark glowing beyond the grave is the very definition of flogging a dead horse.

film? Well I know one little cinema that still exists called Haslemere Hall. Situated in Haslemere (funnily enough) in Surrey, the small building consists of just one screen but is comfortably suitable for film viewing.

Run by the ‘friends of Haslemere Hall’ the average age of the volunteers that run the place is, I would say about 85. However this brings an old English charm to place.

After entering the cinema you may congregate in the bar, putting in an order for your gin and tonic for the

was an old woman sitting next to me who during the rocking chair scene was heard saying to her husband “that sounds like our radiators”.

Also a conversation between two sides of the aisle resulted in: “The dog doesn’t die in the book so let’s hope he doesn’t die in the film, although he might for dramatic effect.”

It’s comments like these that make visiting a small independent cinema so thrilling and I wish that every cinema experience were like it.

NEWS EDITOR

www.sa.mattacott.com

Exclusive illustration for The Rock

Independent cinema’s a real gem Lucy Pullen

Sometimes the big mainstream cinemas aren’t fulfilling enough to get the whole experience of going out to watch a film.

Many multiplexes these days are bland and unfriendly with high priced snacks and drinks.

What happened to the classic cinemas where the experience was about much more than the

interval. Yes they do things by halves here. Usually at a critical moment in the film, it stops whilst the audience, have a break in the bar sipping on a G&T or purchasing a small tub of ice cream.

A bell is then rung to signal the second half and the audience sweep back into the hall to enjoy the rest of the film, however there’s a small few that will dare to come back late, who will receive a collection of ‘tuts’ from audience members as if they have come late to a lesson. This is the other great

thing about small cinemas, the sense of community. Upon my recent visit there to see ‘Woman in Black’ I had a fantastic time.

You can feel the sense of togetherness within the audience, one example was when, during the film, a young girl near the front row screamed and together the audience laughed and clapped.

It makes you feel like you’re in your own front room watching the film. In Haslemere you find the occasional eccentric, one of whom

STAFF

WANTED Editor-in-chief Assistant editor

News editor Deputy News editor Assistant News editor Opinions editor Assistant Opinions editor Features editor Deputy Features editor Assistant Features editor Sports editor Deputy Sports editor Assistant Sports editor Head of design News Head of design Opinion Head of design Features Head of design Sports

Chief Sub Assistant chief sub

Photo editor Assistant photo editor

Online editor Assistant online editor Social media editor

Chief Executive Assistant Chief Executive Head of Distribution Head of PR Writers Photographers Illustrators Designers Subs Advertising Business Distribution PR

All positions are reopening for the 2012-2013 academic year. Application forms will be available on the website: www.bournemouthrock.co.uk Applications closing on October 16, 2012

contact applyrock@gmail.com to apply

opinion 17

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

Supermarkets are to blame for making the British nation obese Adele Couchman COLUMNIST

Discount shoppers are more likely to be overweight TEACHERNZ

In the light of the current British obesity pandemic, it is estimated that nine out of ten adults will be overweight or obese by 2050.

With this harrowing prediction revealed, common sense would suggest that a scheme aiming to combat our truly terrible eating habits was always bound to be on the cards. Unsurprisingly, fast food chains and their low price grub in particular have been stigmatised for contributing to the mess of our nation’s cholesterol ridden diet.

Yet, if we really are concerned about the demon produce that expands our waistlines, our attention should instead be diverted to the places where we get our food from almost on a daily basis: supermarkets.

As far as I’m concerned, eating out is still quite a rarity for the majority of us.

However, taking a trip to the local supermarket is undoubtedly not. With their commitment to the government’s ‘calorie reduction pledge’, the giant food suppliers may appear to have adopted an angelic stance towards tackling

Britain’s number one health crisis.

Yet, you only have to stroll through the entrance to any giant food store to discover that the supermarkets’ alleged commitment to the government’s healthy eating scheme is an absolute joke.

Nearly all food on special offer and at a slashed price is, you guessed it, junk food.

As previously mentioned, budget grub appealing to the current economic climate has meant that fast food available at a pocket friendly price has been demonised for contributing to Britain’s frightening obesity figures .

Yet, astonishingly, not a word has been uttered about buy one get one free doughnuts available at the local Tesco.

Going onto the ASDA website, a link displaying the supermarket’s special offers is one of the first things that greet my eyes.

Unsurprisingly, I am only shown a sugary and fatty feast of crisps, chocolates and fizzy drinks, all alluringly available at a cut price.

Most alarmingly, according to the ASDA website, there are more cakes and deserts on offer in the entire store than salad and fresh fruit and vegetables combined.

Of course, many would argue

that no matter how tempting cheap convenience grub may be, we have a wonderful thing called free will when it comes to deciding what goes in our stomachs.

After all, with many types of fruit and veg available at a reasonable price nowadays, it’s fairly easy to prepare a healthy meal.

Yet, if you are on a tight budget and can purchase buy one get one free chocolate digestives, who in their right mind would not stock up on two?

As well as the supermarkets, convenience stores also seem to be neglecting the green stuff when it comes to their special offers.

Within a devilish Costcutter offer brochure, it struck me that a pre-prepared salad, a cartoon of orange juice, potatoes and a pack of tomatoes were the only available fruit and veg displayed amongst the generous amounts of calorific goods in bright labels.

If KFC were to introduce similar buy one get one free deals on bargain buckets there would be a national outcry.

Despite this, with supermarkets getting away with only slashing the price of grub that gives us heart attacks, it’s unlikely that Britain is going to get any slimmer.

New fitness craze is like ‘hell on Earth’ Oliver Hill

OPINIONS EDITOR Last week The Rock team took some time away from their desks to make a few promotional videos for our shiny new website - coming soon to an internet near you.

Editor-in-Chief Julia arranged for us to take part in something called Crossfit. In short it involves thrashing your body through a variety of exercises until you bring up your latest meal or crumple into a perspiring mess on the floor.

If you were to meet me for the first time I can almost guarantee that one of the first things you would think is “I bet he doesn’t know his deltoids from his pectorals” and you’d be right. I have a pair of match sticks for legs and pipe cleaners for arms. It is possible for me to lift my own body weight, albeit once and I then need several hours rest before a repeat performance is possible.

My dislike for all things fitness related probably stems from the fact that I find the whole affair embarrassing and cringe-worthy.

Firstly you have to dress in

shorts regardless of the weather and look stupid when trudging through the rain to get to your spinning class or whatever.

Speaking of which, I actually witnessed the horror of a spinning class a while ago and I have to say I’ve seen Taiwanese prisons that offer a more pleasant experience.

Crossfit is all about being fit across the board, from long distance running to pulling a ten-tonne lorry with your little finger.

As I was told to do many awkward and frankly stupid things with my body it felt like I was descending through the seven circles of hell, and could almost hear the instructor and other crossfitters thinking “you are pathetic and my shoulder muscles are twenty times the size of yours”.

In the background men in moist vests were making noises I deem inappropriate for a public place.

If you are the kind of person who likes the smell of other people’s sweat and enjoys being repeatedly told by another man to “push your bum out more” then Crossfit will definitely do something for you. All it’s done for me on the other hand is cause me to need a Stannah stair lift to reach my bedroom.

Members of The Rock team try CrossFit, a principal strength and conditioning program SCOTT CRAIG

cherries special 1

CHERRIES

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

Your 3-page Cherries pull-out special

Email

jonnybyrnerocks@gmail.com

Season 2011-12 special Since The Rock began in December 2011, the sports desk has been committed to bringing you unrivalled inside access from the Seward Stadium with player profiles, news and features with the Cherries’ brightest stars.

With that in mind, we thought it was a fitting way to end our debut season by looking back at the whole campaign on the pitch.

Okay, so mid-table isn’t what we all wanted for the boys in red and black, especially with the mid-season

hope of Maxim Demin’s investment, but all things considered, with several players moving onto higher levels before the campaign began, things could have been worse – many clubs in similar circumstances find themselves in relegation battles.

And it’s not like it’s been dreary – there have been many highs and lows, so here it is, the story of the season with a series of pictures, bought to you exclusively by your Bournemouth Rock!

Up the Cherries!

2 cherries special

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

August 2011 It’s a rough old start for Lee Bradbury’s new-look squad – despite a reasonable start in cup competitions, the Cherries lose four of their opening five league games in the opening month.

Eventual title winners Charlton cruise to a 3-0 victory before an impressive home win against Sheffield Wednesday, however, defeats to Stevenage, Carlisle and Walsall leave Bournemouth fourth bottom in the early standings.

Dagenham and Redbridge of League Two are crushed 5-0 in the League Cup before a creditable performance in defeat against West Bromwich Albion ends the Cherries’ interest – Hereford United are comfortably seen off in the Johnstone’s Paint Trophy with a 4-1 victory at the Seward.

September 2011 Defeats to Notts County and Chesterfield heap more pressure on the beleaguered Cherries who sink to second bottom of League One ahead of two crucial away fixtures against bottom-of-the-table Leyton Orient and thirdbottom Exeter City.

When it matters most, Bradbury’s boys perform, recording a first win at Orient since 1948 with a dominant display and goals from Harry Arter, Wes Thomas and Marc Pugh – a first away clean sheet of the season helps Bournemouth gain back-to-back wins, with a 2-0 success at the Grecians, but the month ends in disappointment with a 2-1 defeat at Hartlepool United and the Cherries lie 18th in the League One table, a point off the drop zone.

October 2011 Bournemouth draw for the first time this season after a drab stalemate at Tranmere Rovers, which is quickly followed by two more matches that end with the spoils being shared, disappointingly at home to Rochdale and more impressively at MK Dons – the side is making progress, but the league position is still precarious with a defeat at Bury and a draw against Colchester United leaving Bradbury’s men back in the bottom four.

However, an impressive win 3-1 at Preston North End in front of over 10,000 supporters gives the side confidence in a month that also saw Johnstone’s Paint Trophy progress againstt Yeovil Town, even if it was done the hard way, the Cherries battling through to win 3-2 after leading 3-0.

November 2011 Back to back wins are secured when Scunthorpe United are despatched 2-0 with daylight between the Cherries and the danger zone, but a 6-0 thrashing at Brentford ends any Wembley dreams in the Johnston’e Paint Trophy, while the FA Cup produced another of its shocks when Gillingham won their replay with Bournemouth 3-2 after a 3-3 draw at the Seward amidst controversy over how light the new FA Cup balls were.

On a more positive note, the Cherries keep clean sheets in all three league games this month, beating Wycombe Wanderers 1-0 at Adams Park before a 0-0 draw against Oldham Athletic – the league table makes for much better reading, as Bournemouth sit 15th with a seven point cushion over the relegation places.

January 2012 The year starts well with a 2-0 home win over Wycombe Wanderers thanks to goals from Wes Thomas and Michael Symes in front of over 7,000 supporters – this is followed by a 2-2 draw at Walsall before Notts County and Tranmere are beaten at the Seward signalling a stark contrast in fortunes on home soil – it took Bournemouth just 19 days to register more home league wins than they had in the last four months of 2011.

All of a sudden, Cherries fans are thinking about leaving League One from the top end rather than the bottom – on January 21 they sit 8th in the table and trail 6th-placed Stevenage by just two points.

On the cusp of the play-offs, the jitters kick in though, and a 0-1 reverse at Chesterfield meant that the Spireites completed a league double over Bradbury’s men, despite going on to be relegated.

December 2011 Russ Wilcox joins the Cherries’ management team as Lee Bradbury’s number two and enjoys what proved to be one of Bournemouth’s biggest results of the season, a 1-0 win at promotion chasing Huddersfield Town, ending the Terriers’ unbeaten home run in the league, which had stretched to almost a year – they had also been unbeaten in 43 league matches prior to their previous match against Charlton.

A 2-0 home defeat to Sheffield United followed, but four points from trips to Brentford and Yeovil Town ended the year on a positive note – half way through the season and the green shoots of recovery are apparent with the Cherries perched in 13th place, their main cause for concern being just two home wins from ten league games at the Seward as opposed to six victories from 13 on the road.

cherries special 3

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

April 2012

The poor run continues – Charlton Athletic and Sheffield Wednesday beat Bournemouth before a goalless draw with Carlisle and a closely fought 1-0 win against Brentford.

Oldham Athletic edge the Cherries out at Boundary Park to end Bradbury’s era with Paul Groves and Shaun Brooks placed in charge until the end of the season – Russ Wilcox, Bradbury’s assistant, is put on gardening leave just four months after arriving at the Seward.

Groves kicks off with two draws in his first week, a 2-2 scoreline is well earned at Stevenage before Yeovil hold Bournemouth to a goalless draw four days later.

Chasing the top two, Sheffield United take all three points with a 2-1 win, but Groves enjoys his first success, guiding his charges to a double over Huddersfield, however, a measly two point return from Bury, Colchester and Scunthorpe gives the caretaker manager a run of only one win from seven games in charge.

The season ends with a 1-0 win over Preston North End, as Charlie Daniel’s second half penalty proved pivotal against Graham Westley’s men, leaving the Cherries in 11th place in League One following a tumultuous campaign at the Seward Stadium.

ALL PHOTOS: AFCB/MICK CUNNINGHAM

March 2012

February 2012 Exeter City are put to the sword with a 2-0 win to keep the top six dream alive, but it was a false dawn as a drastic turn for the worse ultimately cost boss Lee Bradbury his job – a goalless draw at Hartlepool is followed by three straight defeats to Leyton Orient, Rochdale and MK Dons.

The season in numbers W. THOMAS

9

The Cherries used seven more men in the League this season compared to 2010-11, with the total figure of different players standing at 35.

Wes Thomas ended the season as the Cherries’ top scorer in League One with 11 goals.

44 Number of League appearances goalkeeper Darryl Flahavan made for AFCB this season, the most for any player, missing just one match in League One.

The final result Bournemouth ended the home campaign with a better home defensive record than 3rd placed Sheffield United, but were amongst the lowest home scorers in the league with only 23 goals – only Hartlepool United ended with a worse record.

In a strange quirk of fate, the Cherries ended up 15 points behind the play-offs and 15 points clear of relegation in a season when there were hopes and fears of both.

Overall, the Cherries were the 3rd lowest scorers in the league with 48 goals from 46 games, but had the 8th best defensive record.

features 19

FEATURES

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

The

FESTIVAL

Vikki Hutton

FEATURES EDITOR

Win!

Free tickets to Brisfest

24

‘Oh yeah’ The Subways are back

25

Email

vhuttonrocks@gmail.com

Brace yourselves, summer is on the horizon and with any luck, the British weather will hold out long enough for us to lap up two months of total freedom. For thousands of you, that freedom is epitomised in the festival season; from burning the candles at both ends to being at one with the great outdoors, something about sleeping rough with your

special

friends in a field that is filled with comfort food, endless booze and great music has come to represent a summer well spent.

In a special edition, The Rock has your ultimate festival experience sorted – from where to be seen, to what to be seen in, and what the people in the tent next you might be getting up to! So read on and whet your appetite for the festival season ahead. And if none of that floats your boat, turn to p26, where we’ve helped plan an alternative summer break for every budget.

d o o g l e e f r es u o Y al memori@aphumphries festiv

Glastonbury, Glastonbury, by far the most incredible festival I've had the pleasure @curriecurrieee of attending Isle Of Wight is my favourite by far, have seen Blondie, Rolling Stones, Muse, Jay-Z and the incredible Paul McCartney over the years @willjrichards Reading Festival '09, I'd just finished my GCSEs and my three favourite bands were headlining, I'd never felt freeer

20 festival special

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

Summer festival hot spots

£189

weekend

With no Glastonbury this year, Carrie Mok and Will Richards give the low down on which festivals are your best bet for a fun weekend, both here in the UK and across Europe Reading and Leeds Festival £197.50

weekend AUGUST Friday 24 to Sunday 26 Richfield Avenue, Reading and Bramham Park, Leeds, England

€220

weekend

The August bank holiday weekend double-headers have been the most popular set of festivals in recent history. This year’s line-up is a cracker, with Foo Fighters, The Cure and Kasabian topping the bill.

Ones to watch: The Black Keys, At The Drive-In, Bombay Bicycle Club, Spector

V Festival

SOLD OUT weekend

AUGUST Saturday 18 to Friday 19 Hylands Park, Chelmsford and Weston Park, Stafford,

€290

for 9 days

Taking place the weekend before Reading and Leeds in Stafford and Chelmsford, V Festival is the pop to Reading’s rock. Chart favourites Nicki Minaj and Ed Sheeran are there, alongside legends The Stone Roses and The Killers return.

Ones to watch: The Stone Roses, Frank Turner, Madness, Ben Howard

Isle of Wight Festival JULY Friday 22 to Sunday 24 Seaclose Park, Newport, Isle of Wight, England

£190

weekend

The first big festival of the summer has a real mix. Headliners Bruce Springsteen, Tom Petty and Pearl Jam suits the dads, but Jessie J, and Tinie Tempah will have the youngsters satisfied too.

Ones to watch: Bruce Springsteen, Pulled Apart By Horses, Noah & The Whale, Lana Del Rey

Bestival

£180

weekend

SEPTEMBER Thursday 6 to Sunday 9 Robin Hill Country Park, Isle of Wight, England

Also taking place on the southern Isle is Bestival, taking place in early September. Florence & The Machine is rumoured to join New Order and Stevie Wonder as the third headliner.

Ones to watch: Sigur Ros, The xx, Stevie Wonder, Emily Barker & The Red Clay Halo

€135

weekend

Main Square Festival

JUNE Friday 29 to Sunday July 1 Arras Citadel, Pas-de-Calais France

Main Square Festival is relatively new to the festivals scene having only taken place in the last ten years. The last few years it has been sited at the UNESCO heritage site Arras Citadel in France. Nearby car parks are free for ticket holders.

Main Square is a beautiful site for a festival taking place amongst 17th Century French houses. Seriously, how often can you watch the likes of Wiz Khalifa in a Citadel?

Ones to watch: Pearl Jam, Blink -182. Incubus, The xx, The Rapture.

SOLD OUT weekend

£190

€155

weekend

weekend

Rock Werchter

Pukkelpop

JUNE Thursday 28 to Sunday July 1 Haachtsesteenweg, Werchter, Belgium

AUGUST Thursday 16 to Saturday 18 Kempische Steenweg, Kiewit Hasselt, Belgium

Taking place in Belgium, 30km from Brussels and ticket holders automatically get free train and bus transport to the festival. Rock Werchter puts most UK festivals to shame with their secondary stage alone with a great choice of dance acts on the Pyramid Marquee stage mixed with hip hop and blues artists, making it perhaps an even better stage than the Main Stage…if it wasn’t for the fact that the Chilli’s were headlining.

Ones to watch: Deadmau5, Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Rise Against, Jack White, Wolfmother.

Boasting strong line ups with an incredible diversity year after year (check out their History on the website) Pukkelpop is just like Rock Werchter. They’re both in Belgium and ticket holders can get a free e-ticket by train or bus to the festival site but may have to switch trains to get there depending on which airport you arrive from.

Ones to watch: Bjork, The Stone Roses, Foo Fighters, The Hives, The Black Keys, Jacques Le Cont (Youtube his Mr Brightside remix) and Lykke Li.

£175

weekend

Latitude JULY Thursday 12 to Sunday 15 Henham Park, Southwold, Suffolk, England

Latitude is one of the more beautiful and serene UK festivals, set in the heart of the Suffolk woodland. The music definitely reflects this, and classic pianist Ying Yang is the first of his kind to ever play a festival in this country. There’s a lot of comedy also on offer.

Ones to watch: Bon Iver, Explosions In The Sky, Tim Minchin, Michael Kiwanuka

9

d

s

festival special 21

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

T in the Park JULY Friday 6 to Sunday 8 Balado, Kinross-shire, Scotland

T in the Park has always been the Scottish equivalent to both Reading and V Festival rolled into one. This Summer, T in the Park brags that it is “the line up to end all line ups”.

Ones to watch: Florence + The Machine, The Subways, The Temper Trap, Howler

Location location location The Rock’s resident sexpert talks festival foreplay and sex in new places

Peace and Love

I

JUNE Tuesday 26 to Saturday 30 Borlänge, Sweden

Peace and Love is devoted to understanding yourself and others, encouraging pacifism. It takes place in Borlange near Borlange airport with a different theme each year to tie in with its message and this years theme is ‘A new world’.

The objectives of Peace and Love make it a fresh and very different festival to the experiences which UK festivals offer. Ones to watch: Rihanna, Billy Idol, Regina Spektor, Bloc Party, M Ward.

Roskilde

JULY Saturday June 30 to Sunday July 8 Roskilde, Denmark

Tha Danish festival is 35km from the capital Copenhagen where you can get trains directly to the festival.

Roskilde technically takes place over nine days with warm up dates from June 30 to July 4 and the actual festival taking place from July 5 to July 8. The festival takes place over nine days butit only costs around 35 euros a day, in comparison to a typical British festival which costs around 50. The ones to watch: The Cure, Bon Iver, Machine Head, Pretty Lights, The Shins.

Download JUNE Friday 8 to Sunday 10 Donington Park, Leicestershire, England Metalheads will be getting their fix at Donington this summer, with a crazily good line-up. Black Sabbath have reunited, and they’re joined by the mighty Metallica and The Prodigy.

Ones to watch: Biffy Clyro, Black Sabbath, Chase & Status Don Broco

Others to see 2000 Trees in Gloucestershire with 65daysofstatic and Gallows, Southside in Germany with Eagles of Death Metal and The Black Box Revelation, Benicassim in Spain with The Stone Roses and De La Soul, Ruisrock in Finland with The Mars Volta and Metronomy, Oya in Norway with St. Vincent.

Dress for the fest Look the part this summer in pastel colours, floral prints, retro sunnies and muddied boots

Joe Kent

Festivalistas, embrace the summer sunshine with clothes to match the eclectic and colourful festival vibes. Fear not the mud and freak downpours, and go crazy with colour, prints and pattern. Pastels are the big trend this season, so a

pair of vibrant pastel shorts is musthave festival attire.

Try mixing it up with the traditional t-shirt, but go bold with stripes, geometric patterns, or a zany print to stand out from the crowd.

Alternatively, you can max out your pattern palette by mixing or matching your top with your bottoms. Floral over floral, stripes versus Aztec print, bird print and polkadot... There are plenty of

JOE KENT

options to choose from. Of course, make sure you always have a pair of cool and colourful sunglasses at hand to fight the glare and keep your favourite bands in eyesight. Try a pair of Spitfire shades (available at ASOS), for a truly quirky style.

And don’t forget those allimportant Wellingtons, for even the sunny days. Hunters are naturally the favourite choice, with their vast range of colours in a gloss finish.

f you want to unlock the door to more passion and excitement in the bedroom then consider getting out of the bedroom. Don’t get sex in new places and voyeurism (dogging) confused as the latter implies arousal from watching or participating in outdoor public sex – which can leave you facing a dry spout of up to six months in a prison cell if caught.

The law states you should act within the realms of taste and decency when engaging in sexual practices. The Safe Outdoor Sex website states: “These laws are not here with the aim of catching everyone who fancies indulging in a spot of outdoor nookie, but more to cover unacceptable sexual behaviour.”

Channel 4’s Great British sex survey, carried out last year, revealed that young people are more willing to fulfil a fantasy at the workplace, school or college – with 27% admitting to educating themselves with the experience. It also showed that southerners are most likely to have sex in pools. This however is not recommended – even a chlorinated pool can have enough bacteria to do some serious damage, so leave the doggy paddling to the professionals.

Cosmopolitan asked over 1,500 of their readers for their frisky favs which are both achievable and legal. 29% of women suggested washing machines, 48% on the kitchen table and 37% in a tent. With the Festival season approaching there’s no harm in getting adventurous as long as you’re sensible when deciding who to share your sleeping bag with. Alfresco frolicking can be a strong bonding experience but make sure your partner shares your dream location as an uncomfortable environment can leave some running for the exit.

If you’re not prepared to risk the romp in new places then discreet flirtation can be just as affective.

Become a sexual opportunist with little gestures such as footsie under the table or going commando in public to heighten the sexual tension.

If you’re after a dream scenario invest your time into finding the best place because it’s all about location, location, location.

XXX

22 features

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

Photo of the fortnight Sam Wilkinson has produced the photo of the fortnight.

This photo is of the American hardcore band Backtrack, they were half way through their UK headline tour with two bands called Broken Teeth and The River Card.

This show was at a venue called the Broomhall Centre in Sheffield put on by my

friends Jordan and Lee. It included 10 bands from around the UK and Europe and plenty of intense moshing, as you can see. This show was my last day home for the Easter break so it was a good send off to see a lot of friends and some good bands all in one day.

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

features 23

24 festival special

!

N I W

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

Q&A from the stage

The Bournemouth Rock, in conjunction with Brisfest, is giving away one of five pairs of FREE tickets to Brisfest 2012. Check out the details below to be in with a shot of winning this festival fabulous prize.

Bournemouth DJ Charlie Banks prepares for his first summer on the UK festival scene SAM BAGGETTE

Dan Vaughan Meet Bournemouth boy Charlie Banks, who can’t wait for the festival season. Having been to many as a punter, this year Charlie will be taking to the stage as a performer.

Booked to play at a number of festivals across England, Charlie Banks is a name to watch out for.

Despite being only 18, Charlie has been DJing for three years.

A regular of We Are Your Friends ‘The Block Party’, Charlie has also recently started a new student night at Dusk ‘til Dawn every Thursday.

Hi Charlie, are you looking forward to the festival season?

It will be my first appearance on the UK festival scene, so I’m really looking forward to it. I’ll be DJing at Gottwood (Anglesey, Wales), Glade (Norfolk) and Noisily (Leicester).

How does it feel to be making your first steps up the festival ladder?

Great! Having spent so many summers there as a fan it’s strange that people will be coming to watch me. It’s all part of expanding my fanbase and getting my music out there to more people. Hopefully I can meet some other DJs, which will help me to grow and learn.

What are you most looking forward to, performing or ‘mingling’ with other DJs?

Performing, no doubt. It’s mental to be booked to play in front of a crowd. From going to festivals as a paying customer, I know that the

crowds are really different at each event. But the crowd is probably the best thing about every single festival; people are just so chilled and friendly. They’re there for a good time and not having to worry about the humdrum of everyday life.

night for music lovers. Much of the rest of the Bournemouth clubbing scene is quite commercial and you hear the same stuff week in, week out. Get Satisfied is for people who want to party to songs that are not just cut and pasted from the Top 40.

Which festivals are your favourites?

What do you think of Bournemouth’s club scene?

Reading, Bestival, and, of course, Glastonbury – I really think that everybody should go to Glastonbury at least once. It’s the greatest festival in the world. I tried my best to see all of it and got nowhere near. It’s non-stop too. You could party for the duration of the event.

Have you got hopes of playing at Glastonbury someday?

I really hope so! If I can keep improving, keep reaching people then hopefully one day I’ll be a big enough name to make it.

So you’re from Bournemouth, is that where you started DJing?

Yeah, it is. I started DJing when I was only 15 in places like Club 176, The Winchester and Sherbert. I was lucky enough to then be given a chance by fellow DJ Zoo Look and Dirt Crew Recordings, who really helped me out a lot early on.

You’ve just started a new night at Dusk ‘til Dawn, tell us about it?

It’s called Get Satisfied and it’s a student night which happens every Thursday. We play house, hip-hop and a bit of garage. There are cheap drinks and good music that you won’t hear elsewhere. I really think that Bournemouth needed a quality

It’s on the up. ‘We Are Your Friends’(WAYF) has always been a good night and ‘The Block Party’ always has very good acts.

You’re somewhat of a regular feature at The Block Party, where else have you played?

I recently played a big night in London at Loft Studios. That was a cool venue. I also headlined in Bokum, Germany at a club called Audiophil a few weeks back. The crowd was 300 people strong, incredible night. I also played in Guimaraes in Braga, Portugal whilst they were celebrating being the cultural capital of Europe.

And a load of places in Brighton, Southampton and, of course, Bournemouth.

And finally, what advice would you give to any budding musicians who dream of playing at festivals?

The best advice I had given to me was to get into producing while you’re young. Being able to produce opens up so many avenues and will improve you as an artist. It definitely helps to get your name heard whilst at the same time improving your knowledge of music. http://soundcloud.com/charliebanks

features 25

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

FI

Marvel Avengers Assemble LM

R

EV

Ben Tyrer

JOHN GRIFFITHS

Dicky Addicott & Tayla Woodard The last time pop-rock trio The Subways were in Bournemouth they were shooting an iconic live performance for the Guy Richie film, RocknRolla. The band returned to The Old Firestation last week with their new album “Money & Celebrity”, a record ridden with political jibes at celebrity culture and materialism.

Its upbeat, quintessentially British sound is greatly due to Stephen Street’s production style and is a stark contrast to the album’s predecessors, “Young for Eternity” and “All or Nothing”.

The rise in digital-based music in the last decade has caused a decline of interest in guitar-based bands like The Subways, but fearless and true to their rock ‘n’ roll roots, the band continues to produce punchy albums lined with melodic acoustic tracks.

Bassist Charlotte Cooper, who demonstrates an energetic and seemingly possessed on-stage persona, places even greater emphasis on the importance that live shows now hold: “I think the one thing that will never die is live music. I don’t think people will ever get sick of going to live shows. Record sales are dwindling, and all this crazy

Pop-rock trio The Subways take to the stage at The Old Firestation in Bournemouth stuff which is completely out of our control, but one thing we are in control of is we love playing gigs.”

The Subways are no stranger to large main stage performances, with Glastonbury and Reading Festival being among the many the band have under their belts, but The Old Firestation provided an intimate and intense atmosphere, an environment the band strives in.

Potent material from all three albums was blasted from the trio, and whilst material from the new album possesses a pop influenced undertone, the tracks were not out

CARRIE MOK

of place against a back catalogue of heavier tracks such as ‘Rock n Roll Queen’ and ‘Kalifornia’.

Cooper gave an insight into the political impetus behind the new record: “He [Billy] spent a lot of the time writing the songs for this album in front of his TV at home, with BBC 24 in the background, and on a more personal level a lot of his friends and family had lost their jobs. That’s what he was really exposed to and what influenced him lyrically.”

As the gig neared to an end, Billy couldn’t resist crowd surfing almost every square metre of the crowd,

assisted by the sweaty reaches of fans whilst Charlotte’s gritty bass and Josh’s solid rhythm maintained the hold of crowd.

Prominent features of the set were ‘Rock n’ Roll Queen’ and ‘Oh Yeah’ with the defining moment being Charlotte’s favourite live track to date, ‘We Don’t Need Money to Have A Good Time’, the song that “people go mental for”.

The Subways will round off the monstrous European Tour this Summer, finishing off with dates in the UK before travelling to Greece for five shows.

George Underwood

loud chorus’ structure among the songs of ‘Born Villain’, which drags in a sense of monotony. When it gets the juxtaposition right, as in ‘Lay Down Your Goddamn Arms’, the choruses can be exhilarating and even uplifting. Faster songs like ‘Murderers Are Getting Prettier Every Day’ and ‘You’re So Vain’ – a cover of the Carly Simon classic featuring Johnny Depp, that will probably be one of the most surreal songs you hear this year – also help to add at least a little variety.

Unfortunately, though, these are exceptions to the rule.

There aren’t that many bands you can compare Marilyn Manson to, but unfortunately in this case that will likely mean ‘Born Villain’ will struggle to find takers outside of its established fanbase rather than making real waves in the modern music scene.

Marilyn Manson/Born Villain ASS’T FEATURES EDITOR

TECHNIQUE PUBLISHING

@

W

THE SUBWAYS

IE

JEN SPRINGALL

It’s probably an understatement to say that Marilyn Manson isn’t for everyone, but then it’s hard to imagine who he is actually suited for – apart from Marilyn Manson fans, who are likely already sold on Born Villain anyway. Industrial metal fans will be left wanting more of an electro edge, while heavy metal fans won’t find much of the genre’s trademark heart-pounding excitement here – despite overdriven guitars and intense drums being in abundance, they are wasted on slow, stripped down songs and often feel out of place compared to the soft vocals and steady beats.

In fact, there are few deviations from the ‘steady beat/quiet verse/

Five movies, ten hours of cinematic adventures and over one billion in ticket sales worth of anticipation is finally over, as Avengers Assemble swoops into cinemas.

The Earth is in serious peril, courtesy of the sneering Loki (Tom Hiddlestone), who has captured the ‘Tesseract’ – an unlimited energy source, exposition fans! – and is planning to fly in an alien army to help him control the earth. With a threat of this magnitude, S.H.I.E.L.D director Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson) tries his best to assemble a team of superheroes who could work together to stop him. Placing demi-god Thor (Chris Hemsworth), The Hulk (Mark Ruffalo), Captain America (Chris Evans) and selfdescribed “genius billionaire playboy philanthropist” Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr) all into one room goes about as smoothly as you would expect.

Avengers Assemble is no normal comic book movie though.

Obviously, it has a cast of characters who have all held their own in films, so it’s near miraculous that director Joss Whedon – of Buffy The Vampire Slayer fame – manages to ensure that the ensemble works well together.

Mark Ruffalo is perhaps the first actor to create a truly compelling movie Hulk, with an odd mixture of serenity and depression.

It also might be the funniest noncomedy you’ll see at the cinema all year, with quips galore being sprinkled all over the script, another hallmark of its director.

As you would expect, Downey Jr’s Iron Man gets the best lines, his glib personality mocks anyone who comes within a mile radius of him, and the scenes featuring him in a toe-to-toe verbal duel absolutely sparkle with wit.

Then there’s the action. It’s impressively filmed - with one tracking shot that could end up being the most memorable shot of the summer –and scenes of utter carnage mixed with subtle character moments that give them personality over bombast.

Avengers Assemble is perhaps the finest Marvel superhero movie yet, something that will please the hordes of fans when they pour into the cinema to see it.

26 features

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

We’re all going on Julia Denni

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

JOHN47KENT

HAN BRUCE

HTTP2007

SHADOWGATE

Close to home

0 0 5 £ under

and

Corsica, France

Scotland If you’re not too worried about getting a tan, why don’t you try kayaking Scotland?

The ghosts and the Loch Ness monster still attract the superstitious, but most travelers go looking for a subtle blend of raw nature and wildlife, rich history and unique culture. Lovers of heather-covered moors and romantic cliffs and waterfalls will return fulfilled, especially if they venture into the northwest, to explore the Highlands.

This region is among the best preserved in Europe with fewer than ten people per square kilometer. Don’t miss out on trying the authentic Scottish whisky! The only potential dark cloud on your trip is the rain.

So make sure you pack your wellies!

Corsica is a land of contrast where the mountain rises from the sea. Called the Isle of Beauty, the Mediterranean Island has a lot to offer: From the paradise of beaches to steep mountains. Isolated in the bush, houses of stone and slate keep family secrets and memories of vendetta.

The Corsican identity also has a regional language and a strong culture. Coveted by the great powers of the Mediterranean, who have left a rich architectural, religious, military and urban legacy, Corsica was successively in the hands of Rome, Vandals, Moors, Byzantium, Pisa and Genoa, before becoming French, two centuries ago.

Northern Ireland Long-neglected by tourists because of tensions between Catholics and Protestants, Northern Ireland shouldn’t be overlooked – it is a region of magnificent heritage. Belfast, where large urban development projects are underway, has become a dynamic and pleasant capital. Derry, the second city of the province, has so much charm despite its troubled past. Northern Ireland boasts spectacular scenery, from the Antrim coast with its famous Giant’s Causeway (pictured) to the Sperrin Mountains.

Cornwall

Who said you need to get on a plane to go on a surf trip? Cornwall is one of the best surf spots in the UK. So, don’t hesitate taking a road trip down to the beautiful coast and be sure to buy yourself a traditional pasty while you’re at it. For most, the stunning landscapes hold some happy childhood memories but it may be time to create some new ones. Newquay’s nightlife is perfect for the summertime too, sweet and so much fun.

an

29CM

DANIEL SPENDER

MONTECRUZ FOTO

FEDERICO CAPOANO

Top student destinations

£4d 0un0der

Serbia: Exit Festival Croatia A fascinating transition between Central Europe and the Mediterranean, Croatia is a crossroads of cultures and influences. The outstanding coast and crystal waters are the pleasures of sailors and snorkelers and architectural gems such as Split, Šibenik, and the pearl of the Adriatic, Dubrovnik.

The inland beauty of untouched national parks and glorious lakes offers a nice alternative to the seaside with incredible wildlife including 400 mountain bears.

Spanish islands: Ibiza, Majorca & Minorca

Greek islands: Mykonos, Zante, and Corfu

The perfect destination for clubbers and sun seekers, the contrasted beauty of the Balearic Islands combines the excesses of the night and the relaxed attitude of the day. With Ibiza’s amazing nightlife known as one the best in the world, your holiday is going to be ‘caliente’.

The classic lads and girls-only holiday – sea, sex and sun are on the programme and you won’t be disappointed. More than just a student destination, the Greek islands have plenty to offer: water sports, snorkeling, architecture, history, scenery and culture can add up as long as you’re not too hungover.

Festival lover? Already experienced the best England has to offer and you want to try something different? Exit Festival in Serbia is what you’re looking for. It started in 2000 in rebellion to Milosevic’s government, with 96 hours of non-stop music. It takes place in the historic Petrovaradin fortress in the heart of Novi Sad only an hour from the Serbian capital Belgrade on 1km of beach. With more than 50 international headliners including Duran Duran, Guns’n’Roses and Wolfmother, the event attracts more than 50,000 festivalgoers per day from around the world.

features 27

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

a summer holiday SARA MARLOWE

MARCO LAZZARONI

Adventure and discovery

0 0 5 1 £ and r

unde

DAVID BERKOWITZ

Sri Lanka Mexico

Rich in archaeological monuments, magnificent beaches, and stunning colonial cities, Mexico is one of the finest expressions of the excessiveness of Latin America. Immediately evoking pre-Hispanic civilizations, tropical forest, cactus deserts and adventure, Mexico is the exotic and colorful symbol of a happy holiday.

Sri Lanka is a country with two faces: the scars of the tsunami of December 2004 gradually fade while the tension between Tamils in the North and the government are still strong. Tourists are still showing their love to the charming features of Ceylan: the fields and spice gardens, beaches lined with coconut trees, beautiful tea plantations lining the mountainsides, but also the cities swallowed by the jungle and returned to civilization today, the Buddhist temples, and huge statues of the reclining Buddha.

Tanzania

Bali, Indonesia Although small, Bali is a very popular destination. The “Island of the Gods” has a rich diversity of unique landscapes; beautiful beaches of the south, perfect surf breaks all year around, green mountains through breathtaking volcanoes and rice terraces.

Above all, the warmth of Balinese allows visitors to easily discover the vibrant culture and an authentic island steeped in traditions.

In Bali you are guaranteed to have a good time.

DOMINIK BATSCH

Berlin’s attractive power lies in the ultramodern city centre, the Mitte, and the quarter of Potsdamer Platz, but it also preserves an alternative area in the districts of Kreuzberg and Prenzlauer Berg, with plenty of vintage and organic shops. A real trendsetter, the capital is known for its dynamic nightlife and creativity.

£3d 0un0der

an

ZERO ONE

WOLFGANG STAUDT

Berlin

DOMINIK BATSCH

Weekend getaways

The breathtaking beauty of Tanzania is reminiscent of the origins of man and gives you the best nature has to offer. From huge spaces roasted by the African sun, mountains, including the eternal snow of Kilimanjaro, volcanoes sprung from the bowels of the Earth and unforgettable safaris, to the turquoise water of the coastal islands of Zanzibar and Pembla and its fragrant spices influenced by Eastern cultures. Tanzania is a destination you will remember for the rest of your life.

Rome Rome is the Italian city of excellence, a feast for fine food and wine, splendid architecture, and warm Roman people.

Nowhere else is 28 centuries of history represented in one city: temples and Roman amphitheatres, countless churches testifying of the early days of Christianity, baroque and Renaissance palaces, fountains and squares, medieval alleys – all styles mix together in one unique city.

Amsterdam

Bicycles are going to be your new best friend to explore the stylish city of Amsterdam by day. Don’t miss out on the historic city centre, the picturesque canals and waterfront, the museums, the ultramodern architecture and the windmills of the countryside.

Amsterdam’s hectic nightlife reveals another visage as the sun goes down. The famous Red Light district, the coffee shops, bars, clubs, pubs and “window girls” bring an electric twist to what the city has to offer.

Barcelona Popular with tourists from around the world seeking for a compromise between urban streets and the beach, Barcelona is teeming with nightlife, shopping and cultural attractions. It exudes an air of perpetual holiday, with the houses of Gaudí cohabiting with Gothic architecture and the waterfront lined with palm trees, bars and restaurants.

sport 29

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

SPORT

Floyd flaunts flair Jordan Key

Cricket Popularity rising?

33

Road to Wembley

Playoffs promise

35

Tweet beat

“

I think it's sad there's other football on FA Cup final day @tim lovejoy

Email

”

jonnybyrnerocks@gmail.com

Pretty boy Floyd may have cemented his place as an all time great, beating Puerto Rican star Miguel Cotto with a 12-round unanimous decision in Las Vegas.

Fight fans across the world were left fulfilled when the two prizefighters met at 154 pounds. The pace was unrelenting throughout the 12-rounds as both men went at one another for the WBA light middleweight belt.

Mayweather is a controversial figure in the world of boxing, his arrogance and egotism grates with many fans of the sport. The HBO series 24/7 showed a glimpse into his personal life and training regime, whilst also touching on the prison time Mayweather faces in June. Cotto, on the television series seemed a much more affable family man, with a kind heart but an astringent determination to win. Unfortunately his family couldn’t help him in the ring as was comfortably beaten.

Mayweather looked very slick, letting Cotto come forward but slipping elegantly the clubbing punches. Cotto’s tactics were to utilise that fabled left hook to the body that had crippled so many fighters before. He closed down the ring forcing Mayweather onto the ropes for most of the fight, trying to test Mayweather’s heralded tight defence. Success was limited but did bloody the nose of Mayweather who, by the end knew he had been in with a live wire. His tactics seemed a little more effective, soaking up vicious

rallies from Miguel Cotto on the ring supports and then forcing him back, unleashing stinging 1-2’s and camera friendly right hooks.

By the end of the fight you could make a case for Cotto to maybe have earned a draw, but the judges ringside saw the fight with a much wider margin, two judges scoring it 117-111 and the other 118-110. I feel this was harsh on the efforts of the Puerto Rican fan favourite, as even Mayweather admitted he was “the toughest dude I ever fought”.

The future for each fighter looks like it can go in multiple routes.

Cotto may call for a rematch, which would be entertaining, but ultimately pointless because for all his positives, Cotto’s style is too one dimensional for him to have a serious chance of winning. He may also face Mexican rising-star Saul ‘Canelo’ Alvarez, who fought on the undercard of this bout, beating a jaded yet feisty Shane Mosley.

This would bring huge PPV figures but Cotto probably is too much of a

step up for the 21-year-old unbeaten fighter.

Mayweather was once again asked about his nemesis Manny Pacquiao and whether that fight may happen after his stint in prison. Floyd claimed he was up for a showdown, but managed to dodge giving an answer on whether he would split the purses 50-50 with the Pacman. Sergio Martinez recently claimed he could come down to 154, stoking the flames for a potential fight which would excite all boxing fans.

Miguel Cotto (left) was no match for Mayweather (right), who achieved a unanimous win SPORTSANGLE.COM

Don’t hang Hodgson yet Show me the Money

Jonny Byrne

SPORTS EDITOR The England manager’s job is the toughest role, not only in football, but in the world - besides maybe traffic wardens. Us Brits love to hate our national manager and the appointment of Roy Hodgson has continued this trend.

Already fans and critics are angry over the appointment of the ex-West Brom and Liverpool

manager, suggesting that the job is above him and that he doesn’t have the experience to lead our ‘underachieving’ nation.

Let’s just jump down from our unearned high horse for a second and wake up to what’s really going on. Hodgson is great at helping struggling teams to recover and that is what we are at the moment.

He proved his abilities to turn teams around when at the helm of both Fulham and West Brom, turning both teams into tougher, more credible Premier League outfits, and even took Fulham to a European final - something we’ll all be hoping for this summer.

I’m not saying that he is a better choice than Redknapp, but let’s not dismiss the man before he’s started.

Let’s do that if we fail to make it out of our group on June 19.

Andy Mitchell

ASS’T SPORTS EDITOR From one managerial appointment made, to one to come – just who will be the next manager of AFC Bournemouth?

In reality, there has been little speculation so far, possibly pointing the way for Paul Groves to remain in the Cherries hotseat. Groves has won only two of his eight games in charge at the Seward Stadium, but victory

over Preston North End on the final day gives the ex-Grimsby boss a ray of hope, if indeed he wants the job.

Unsurprisingly, Groves is the bookies favourite – in his first interview for the club’s website he referred to chairman Eddie Mitchell’s desire to have him more involved in first team affairs. Others appearing on the betting shortlist include Mark Cooper, son of Leeds legend Terry, and Mark Robins, successful in League Two with Rotherham United.

The second favourite looks to be the most interesting, with ex-Walsall and Luton Town boss Richard Money in the running – “Dicky Dosh” has a reputation for attacking sides and after just 48 goals in the league this season, the Cherries need an injection of goals. My cash is on Groves, but a move for Money would be dough well spent.

30 sport

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

Road to London 2012:

Meet the Team GB football hopefuls

In just eleven weeks Team GB start their Olympic Football campaign against the rest of the world, determined to win Gold in front of a home crowd. This week The Rock looks at who could make the men’s squad and what our chances are against other teams.

Penalties A Gold medal match has only been decided on penalties once, when Cameroon beat Spain in 2000

Gareth Bale

Did you know?

ADIDAS

Tottenham’s game changing left-winger has taken the Premier League by storm over the past couple of seasons. Gareth Bale has competed against some of the world’s best players, but very rarely for his country due to Wales’ lack of international tournament play.

With a phenomenal work rate and incredible pace on and off the ball, Bale has the ability to run at defences and force errors in an opposing with ease, often changing games and not allowing defences to rest and reset their line. It is these attributes that will work in Team GB’s favour against sides such as Senegal and the United Arab Emirates in the early stages of the tournament. Meanwhile his resilience and perseverance against even the strongest defences in the world will benefit us greatly in later games.

Bale has already appeared wearing Team GB’s Olympic kit suggesting that he is a dead cert to make Stuart Pearce’s squad this summer. Bale’s ability on the pitch, as well as his professionalism off of it are exactly what Pearce will be looking for and will be a necessary asset to the team if we want to get our hands on a Gold medal.

Players must be under 23 years old, but three members of the squad can be overage

Medals Table The GB squad have only ever won two medals, both Gold in 1908 and 1912

Rules Olympic football follows the same format as most international football tournaments. Matches are 90 minutes long and played by 11 players on each team.

Sixteen teams are split into four groups with each team playing each other once. The top two teams progress to the knockout format quarterfinal. Winners progress to the semi-final with the two winners of those games competing in the final for the Gold and Silver medals. The losers compete for Bronze.

Players must be twenty-three or younger to be eligible to play in the tournament, however each team may include three players who are older than the age limit.

Six stadiums are being used for matches: Wembley (London), The Millennium Stadium (Cardiff), Hampden Park (Glasgow), Old Trafford (Manchester), City of Coventry Stadium (Coventry) and St. James’ Park (Newcastle).

Danny Welbeck Welbeck has had tough competition during his club career. Having to fight for position against the likes of Wayne Rooney, Dimitar Berbatov, Javier Hernandez and Michael Owen, it is no suprise that he has been unable to secure a constant place in the Red Devil’s squad. Loan spells at both Preston North End and Sunderland have allowed Wellbeck to muscle his way back into United’s squad and has featured on several occasions this season.

With four England caps already under his belt, the forward may be hopeful for a place in Roy Hodgson’s Euro 2012 squad, with the added bonus that if he is not selected he would have to be extremely unlucky not to be considered for Pearce’s Olympic team. He has certainly proved his worth.

At only 21, Welbeck shows signs of constant improvement and given a couple more years could become a permanent fixture for England.

Aaron Ramsey

Aaron Ramsey will almost certainly be in Stuart Pearce’s summer squad, with the young Welshman already proving himself on the international stage. Despite only being 21, he’s already been handed the armband for his country, making him the youngest Welsh captain ever.

His Premier League credentials are impressive too, with regular performances in Arsenal’s

competitive midfield when he’s fit.

This is one of his main problems though, after recovering from an horrific leg break in 2010 he’s had niggling injuries that have forced Arsenal to ship him out on loan to Nottingham Forest and Cardiff in order to drum up some form.

He could be a real star for the Team GB squad though, and would link up well with his fellow countryman Bale and complement a midfield that could contain some older experienced stars that will give him license to roam forward and create goal-scoring

opportunities.

Some of the world’s top celebrities will be fearful of Ramsey’s potential appointment though. Four of his goals for Arsenal have been followed by a notable person’s death – so far Osama Bin Laden, Steve Jobs, Muammar Gadaffi and Whitney Houston have fallen victim. So whilst the public want to see him appointed, some will hope he’s overlooked so they can have a relaxing summer.

Ramsey should start warming up for this summer’s tournament now as his place is almost guaranteed.

sport 31

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

2400 1900

Number of footballs that will be used during the competition

Football was first introduced in this year at the Paris Olympic games

8

Team GB have only made eight appearances at the Games

504

Total number of men and women competing in the Games

6-1

Team GB’s biggest defeat was against Bulgaria in 1956

ADIDAS

Jack Rodwell Alex OxladeHe’s already been seen modelling the Team GB kit, so you would assume that Jack Rodwell will be representing us come July. Stuart Pearce knows him well too, having worked with him in the Under 21s. His most notable performance under Pearce was his first start in the 2009 European Championships, where he scored against Germany and received praise for his all round performance.

He operates mainly as a defensive central-midfielder, guarding the defence whilst utilising his wide range of passing to set up attacks. He’s an intelligent player that could operate effectively in the Team GB squad and it surely won’t be long before he becomes a regular England international.

The two caps that he has received have come through a 1-0 win against Spain and three days later against Sweden. There’s a chance that he’ll be snapped up for the Euros and therefore not for Team GB, but with Scott Parker performing much the same role, his

place is in doubt.

Everton have reaped the rewards of their homegrown talent too.

Rodwell has been at the club since he was seven and is now a regular for the first team. His consistently brilliant performances have seen him attract interest from Chelsea, Man United and Tottenham and he’s valued at around £20million.

Rodwell will help steady the Team GB ship at the back this summer.

Did you know?

Women’s teams weren’t introduced into the Games until 1996 at Atlanta

Golden oldies Ryan Giggs

Chamberlain

‘The Ox’ has been an integral part of Arsenal’s current campaign, and despite his age has had a promising debut in the Premier League. Despite playing in the same position as Theo Walcott, another of Southampton’s young protégées picked up by the Gunners, Oxlade-Chamberlain has managed to hold a starting XI position against strong European opposition. There is no doubt that Alex will play a much larger role for his club next season, especially after Arsene Wenger forked out £12million for the youngster to snatch him away from the south coast.

Utilizing his raw power and bursts of speed, OxladeChamberlain brushes off

Medals Table With three Gold medals, Hungary have won more than any other country

No player has more experience of top flight football than Manchester United’s Ryan Giggs. With limited experience of international tournaments due to Wales failure to qualify for major tournaments, Giggs could consider the chance to play on an international stage if Pearce chooses to call on him.

Paul Scholes As arguably one of the most prolific English midfielders to grace the pitch, Paul Scholes has adapted his game continuously throughout his career in order to compete against younger, faster players. Scholes revealed his disappointment at turning down the opportunity to play at the 2010 World Cup; could he take the opportunity to represent Great Britain if asked?

From left: Paul Scholes, Ryan Giggs and David Beckham could be chosen to be the three overage players for the GB squad at the Games

defenders and finds pockets of space to break into creating goal scoring opportunities from the right-wing. The Ox is renowned for playing without fear, even against world class players, an asset that will definitely have Stuart Pearce considering him for the Olympic Squad. However, the same could be said for new first team boss Roy Hodgson, who may plan to take the Arsenal youngster to the European Championships in June, ruling him out of Olympic selection.

Oxlade-Chamberlain is the ideal player for a short summer tournament, and after impressing in his first few England Under-21 performances it won’t be long until the England first team comes calling.

An Olympic Gold Medal would certainly speed up this process.

Who are we up against?

Senegal

July 26 – Old Trafford, Manchester Senegal were the last team to qualify for London 2012 beating Oman 2-0. Pearce has stated that he will be taking no opponent lightly and although we should beat Senegal they are able to call on Newcastle’s Demba Ba and Papiss Cisse who have taken the Premier League by storm.

United Arab Emirates David Beckham Pearce hasn’t yet ruled out Beckham from his shortlist and growing speculation suggests that he will play a part in this summer’s games. Beckham’s leadership will be a great asset to Team GB’s younger players and his ability on the pitch is still obvious to fans.

Very few people would not like to see David Beckham with an Olympic Gold medal and hopefully after this summer that will be a reality.

July 29 – Wembley Stadium, London UAE topped their Asian Olympic qualifying group B. England will feel confident against the tournament underdogs but with a host of young relatively unknown players, Pearce’s men should be carefully not to underestimate the Asian hopefuls.

Uruguay

August – Millenium Stadium, Cardiff Uruguay should be Team GB’s toughest rivals in Group A. They finished second to Brazil in the 2011 South American Youth Championships to qualify for the Olympics. If manage to include talisman Luiz Suarez and Diego Forlan as two of their allotted ‘senior’ players, they could become real medal contenders.

sport 33

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

Is cricket on its way up?

A Realist’s Perspective Dan Welling

Hendry the greatest ever?

Successful England players like batsman Kevin Pietersen could be partly responsible for the rise in popularity of the sport GARETH1953

Josh Green Imagine these two questions being posed by a child to a friend of theirs when stuck with nothing to do one evening, and have a quick guess as to which one you think would be met with greater enthusiasm. “Fancy going to football training tonight?” or “Fancy a game of cricket tonight?”

I may be being presumptuous here, but I’m going to predict that you answered with the first question. Historically, you would most likely have been right.

However, times are changing, and things are looking up for cricket as a rapidly growing sport.

What other country can claim to be number one in the male and female Test rankings, reigning men’s and women’s World Twenty20 Cup champions, female reigning ICC World Cup champions, and hold the Learning Disabilities World Title?

I’m 99% sure that the vast majority of you reading this didn’t know about every single one of those current rankings, but it is this large amount of success that seems to be the driving force behind cricket becoming a much more widely played and supported sport.

Gone are the days where it was a

sport only played by the privately educated population. Since its launch in May 2005, the ‘Chance to Shine’ program (through the cricket Foundation charity) has reached 1.4 million state school children in 71,699 hours of coaching time, and is on target to reach its ten-year plan of re-instating cricket as a ‘played sport’ in a third of the country’s state schools.

It seems that growth is not only occurring at a youth level either.

Adult club memberships are up 14% on 2009 figures, and with the Government’s Active People survey quoting that nearly 200,000 adults are playing at least once a week, it seems that the nation is really taking

the game to heart.

Enough statistics though – my point has been made.

The question now is, how can you get involved? With both the England & Wales Cricket Board and your local Dorset County Cricket Board supplying information on local clubs and schemes in your area, there really is very little excuse why you can’t give the sport a go if you haven’t already.

With both the Men’s and Women’s Twenty20 World Cup’s taking place later this year, what better time to experience the game first hand whilst following your national side? Get involved in the cricket revolution!

Van Persie matches Henry’s record Maisie Buchan Despite an embarrassing 3-3 draw against mid-table Norwich last Saturday, Robin Van Persie’s two goals meant that the Arsenal captain has now matched previous Highbury hero Thierry Henry’s 30 Premier League goals in the 2003/04 season.

When the Gunners visit West Brom away on Sunday for their last match of the season, the Dutch international will no doubt be determined to score in order to beat the record and pinch Henry’s title. Although the Frenchman holds permanent position at The Emirates stadium in the form of a (questionable looking) bronze statue - one of three honouring ‘club legends’ – and returned to the club for a brief loan spell earlier this year, he has not played for the Gunners since leaving for Barcelona in 2007.

Wenger has needed someone

to fill the 34-year-old’s boots for some time. The signing of Marouane Chamakh looked to have the potential to make a difference to the squad, but instead the Moroccan has been disappointing fans since 2010.

There was of course Cesc Fabregas, but he was always destined to return to Barcelona.

Looking at Van Persie in 2011/12 – the highest scorer of the league so far and PFA’s player’s player of the year – it’s hard to imagine him being anything but Arsenal’s star player.

However the 28-year-old’s career has been largely dogged by injury and he has only had a chance to reach his true potential at the end of last season - remaining injury free and clinical in front of goal ever since.

In 2009 he signed a long-term contract and was quoted as saying that: “My heart is with Arsenal and I just can’t picture myself in a different shirt”.

Despite Henry repeatedly telling fans a similar thing, could RVP finally be the one to stay, and secure his place as the hero the Gunners so sorely need?

Van Persie

V Henry

11/12 30

Season Goals

03/04 30

37

Appearances

37

12 170

Assists Shots

9 171

£2.75m

Goals to game Ratio Price tag

£11m

2004-

With club

1999-2007

0.81

0.81

When Stephen Hendry retired from the snooker game midway through the 2012 World Championships, inevitable questions were asked as to whether he was the best ever. If the cold hard facts are to be believed then the simple answer is yes.

Seven world titles, five UK titles, eleven maximums – three of which came at the Crucible with the last coming in his first round this year – and 36 ranking titles over a 18 year time period – eight more than his nearest rival Steve Davis. All this must surely point to naming Hendry the undisputed king of the green cloth.

But we Brits have never liked winners. So often we prefer the gutsy underdog or the man who plays by his own rules but plays them with style. Men like Alex Higgins and Jimmy White have always won many more hearts then the Scot and always seem to be niggling little thorns in Hendry’s side whenever the question of best ever comes up. Hendry’s continued dominance over the nation’s darling Jimmy White made him unpopular with the 90’s generation and unfortunately that has never been forgotten.

Whilst Steve Davis continues to play for love even after 17 years without a ranking trophy, Hendry was never going to do that. The unquenchable thirst for titles and winning is what defines Hendry and if he wasn’t going to win anymore, he might as well have left.

As a snooker fan I personally just missed Hendry’s pomp during the 90’s, winning six titles in a row before Ken Doherty ended his run in 1997. All I saw were flashes of the Hendry people referred to the as the greatest ever. Snooker does allow players to carry on their careers a lot longer than most other sports and the longer you stay around the dimmer your legend becomes.

So is Hendry the greatest ever? At this stage, yes. Men like Higgins and White had the power to entertain the masses but not the steel needed to win major titles one after the other. And while they had the game to match Hendry on occasions, they don’t have the titles to match him.

There is only one man who could overtake Hendry in the foreseeable future, Ronnie O’Sullivan. The greatest natural talent in the history of the game, a man who could obliterate anybody including Hendry if he put his mind to it has the popularity and the game to usurp the ‘Great One’. But his mind is fragile and his talent has only won him three world titles. He has a long way to go before he can match the man of steel.

34 sport

Devil's Advocate

Red-emption

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

Burning rubber in Barcelona Mugello testing: The Rock looks back on the weekend’s first in-season test since 2008, and preview Sunday’s Spanish GP

Jasper Taylor Looking at the Premier League table won’t be a favourable pastime for Kenny Dalglish, with his side currently sitting in 8th position. If they stay there, it will be their joint lowest finish in Premier League history. On the face of it, this sounds quite bad but Liverpool’s season has largely been a success.

Reason number 1: A trophy.

Okay, I hear you snickering at Liverpool because they’ve won the Carling Cup but I might then ask you how your team did. Surely losing in the Carling Cup is more embarrassing than winning it? Anyhow, this was Liverpool’s first trophy since the FA Cup in 2006, a year after they won some game in Istanbul. If it was a new piece of silverware in the dust-collecting cabinet that the fans wanted, then Dalglish and his team delivered.

Reason number 2: FA Cup final. Even if you were to mock the Reds for their Carling Cup victory, getting to the FA Cup final is no mean feat. Especially when you’ve had to beat Man U, Stoke and Everton to get a pop at the trophy. It wouldn’t be fair to say that Kenny Dalglish has turned Liverpool into a cup team – they’ve been that for over 20 years.

Reason number 3: European football. It might not be the dizzy heights of the Champions League that Liverpool fans would have dreamt of but European football was essential in any form. Only a fool would suggest that the Europa League is redundant – some of the best European entertainment has come from the competition and teams such as Athletico Madrid, Schalke and Bilbao would be a stern test for the Reds and would give some of the inexperienced players a chance to ease themselves into the European challenge.

Reason number 4: The team.

They’ve actually got quite a good side. In a season that has seen them dogged by injury, they’ve fielded 11 good individuals in most games, even if they haven’t merged as a team. This shows an improved depth of squad and even Andy Carroll is beginning to tick. If he, Suarez and Gerrard can stay fit, Liverpool have real potential next season. It’s a big if though - I said the same at the start of this campaign. All of this without Lucas too - their best player from last season - who solifies the shaky defence.

In a year of sinking ships, Liverpool are sailing towards a successful future.

Red Bull will look forward to the Spanish Grand Prix after their success in Catalonia in 2011 - Sebastian Vettel won this race last year SLITZF1

“

Ash Hover

The roaring sounds of the 2.4 litre v8 F1 engines have been sparse over the past three weeks, but the sport returns to our television screens this weekend, with the start of the European phase of the season.

The teams have had a three-week race break, but were seen on track last weekend for the first in-season test since 2008, at the Mugello circuit in Italy.

Italy’s very own Ferrari were the main pushers for the in-season test to be held, as the Scuderia F2012 has lacked performance in the first four calendar races. However, Team Principal, Stefano Domenicali and his team arrived at the track with very minimal upgrades to the car, something that ‘shocked’ Sky F1 expert, Ted Kravitz.

“

I expect Lotus to be very competitive at Barcelona.

It’s going to be very, very close between the top teams. This is the only circuit where the teams have already tested with the new cars, and the set-up is crucial as the track changes with the wind and temperature. All the teams have updates for the first European race, which makes it even more interesting and even tighter at the top. “I have won here twice, and there’s nothing better than winning in any Grand Prix. Those two wins are my only podiums in the event.

”

Kimi Raikonen

It’s the first European race of the season, so it will be all hands on deck after a successful Mugello test. It was a tricky start, but it finished off well and we head to Barcelona with good miles on the car and an understanding of some new avenues. I like the Barcelona track, we do a lot of work there and it’s a track that’s been good to me in the past. I got pole there for the last two years and converted it to a win in 2010, so I’m looking for a strong weekend. It’s tight amongst the teams, so we’re mindful that we need to get everything right to get a good weekend

”

Mark Webber, Red Bull 2011 Qualifying - 1st, 2011 Race - 4th

Red Bull’s Christian Horner questioned the usefulness of the test as well, adding that, “it’s very beautiful and the food is very good, but we are spending a lot of money and honestly we didn’t feel the need to come here”.

Both Jenson Button and Lewis Hamilton chose to play no part in the testing sessions either, many have questioned the in-season test, including Caterham’s Vitaly Petrov, who branded the Mugello circuit a “very dangerous track”.

But a number of teams, including Lotus, have described the testing sessions as ‘interesting’, claiming they have found a number of good directions to look towards ahead of the Spanish Grand Prix.

Frenchman Roman Grosjean, fresh off his first career podium finish at the previous race, was the early pace-setter, beating double world champion Sebastian Vettel to the top spot over the first two days of testing.

A number of teams chose to focus on upgrading their cars, but Lotus decided to concentrate on set-up comparison work in dry conditions, focusing purely on this weekend’s race at the pacey Catalunya circuit; a track where car set-up and gear ratio changes could prove vital.

All the teams head to Spain revitalised and recharged after the understandably stressful period in Bahrain, and the drivers must be looking forward to getting behind the wheel without any external distractions.

As for the race, 27-year-old Brit, Lewis Hamilton, who has finished third three times this season, said the fight to win the Spanish Grand Prix is wide open.

“It is all so hard to read,” said Hamilton.

“It is so difficult to predict who will be at the front because of the form this year.

“

Barcelona can be a funny circuit: we all test there so regularly that every driver knows it like the back of his hand, yet it can still be an extremely tricky place to get absolutely right. But, because every team is so dialled in to the track, even having a well-sorted car isn’t necessarily the answer because it’s sometimes the smallest differences that determine the order.

”

Lewis Hamilton

“We did well in winter testing at Barcelona and that was good for us, but they (Red Bull) won last year’s race.”

And with rival Sebastian Vettel leaping above Hamilton in Bahrain, the 2008 World Champion must

“

Of all the current GP tracks, Barcelona is the one that we know the most because we have done so much testing there in recent years.

That said, the knowledge that you gain at the tests doesn’t always help due to the changing wind direction that occurs there, which can sometimes give you a nasty surprise, especially into Turn One. But in general, a car that functions well aerodynamically in Barcelona will work everywhere - so it will be an interesting weekend. We have been working on the package for Barcelona at this week’s test, but we will still have set-up work to do there on arrival

”

Sebastian Vettel, Red Bull 2011 Qualifying - 2nd, 2011 Race - 1st

be eager to get back ahead of the German. Something he couldn’t achieve in either of the past two years.

F1 fans across the globe can look forward to an exciting return to the track, which almost feels as if the season is starting again after such a long break.

The teams come to Barcelona with a number of positive car changes, and with the approval of the Mercedes Petronas controversial, but performance enhancing dual DRS wing system, everyone is keen to see each manufacturers take on the drag reduction tool.

Both Sunday’s race, and Saturday’s qualifying sessions will commence at 1pm GMT, a much healthier time compared to the previous four races, and many will be eager to see who has come out of testing on top, whilst enjoying a lovely Sunday roast, I’m sure.

sport 35

The Rock | Thursday 10 May

Road to Wembley Craig Rodhouse

With the Premier League reaching its finale this weekend and the Football League Playoffs taking shape, there is still plenty to play for in the four divisions.

Premiership

Man City edged towards a first Premiership title after two second half goals from Yaya Toure were enough to secure a 2-0 victory over Newcastle. With Manchester Utd only managing to win 2-0 themselves against Swansea, City’s superior goal difference should mean that victory over QPR will secure the title. However, if United can better City’s result when they play Sunderland, the Red Devils will grab a 20th league title at the expense of their neighbours.

With Arsenal, Tottenham and Newcastle all failing to win at the weekend, the battle for the Champions League will go to the final day. The Gunners know that victory over West Brom will secure third spot, whilst local rivals Spurs know that three points against Fulham will seal the final Champions League place. Newcastle would need to better Tottenham’s result to cap an incredible season with European

qualification.

Chelsea find themselves rank outsiders to qualify for Europe through their league position and find their destiny out of their hands.

However, victory against Bayern Munich in the Champions League final would secure Champions League football for the Blues, meaning that only the top three teams in the Premiership would qualify.

At the bottom of the league, a bizarre final few minutes on Sunday saw the relegation picture turned on its head, ahead of the final league games of the season.

Bolton entered the final minute of their game against West Brom with a 2-1 lead and believing that they would head into the final game of the season with survival in their own hands. However, a 90th minute equaliser from James Morrison plunged Owen Coyle’s side back into the relegation places. The Trotter’s misery was then compounded when they discovered that QPR had scored a last-minute winner themselves.

Owen Coyle’s side now find their destiny out of their own hands and must beat Stoke on the final day whilst relying on slip-ups from the sides around them to survive.

Championship

After Southampton’s final day victory over Coventry secured their place in the Premiership, muchfancied West Ham had to settle for

a playoff spot. They would face a Cardiff side, who had to come from a goal down against Crystal Palace on the final day, to secure the final playoff place in the division.

A brace from midfielder Jack Collison in the first leg in Wales saw the Hammers take a healthy 2-0 aggregate lead back to East London.

The other playoff semi-final would see the other two sides to have been relegated from the Premiership last year meet; Birmingham and Blackpool. The first leg at Bloomfield Road saw Ian Holloway’s Blackpool take a 1-0 lead to St Andrews.

Thomas Ince’s deflected shot proved to be the only goal in a cagey opening leg.

League One

After the relegation picture was determined in the penultimate weekend of the season, all attention turned to the top of the table heading into the final games of the campaign.

Sheffield Wednesday occupied the final automatic promotion place, one point ahead of arch rivals Sheffield United, knowing that victory over Wycombe would clinch promotion. A comfortable 2-0 victory saw the Owls seal a return to the Championship, meaning Danny Wilson’s Blades would have to settle for the playoffs.

With MK Dons and Huddersfield having already secured their places in the playoffs, there was only one available spot remaining. Stevenage

went into the final weekend occupying the final playoff place - level on points with Notts County but knowing that their superior goal difference would mean that victory would secure sixth spot.

County’s 4-1 victory over Colchester meant that Gary Smith’s Stevenage had to beat Bury at home.

Goals from Craig Reid, Joel Byrom and Chris Beardsley sealed a 3-0 victory, securing sixth position and keeping alive hopes of back-to-back promotions.

Playoff Fixtures: Sheffield United v Stevenage MK Dons v Huddersfield

League Two

With Swindon and Shrewsbury already securing the top two promotion places in the league, it was left to Crawley, Torquay and Southend to battle it out for the final automatic promotion space.

Crawley’s victory over Accrington on the final day secured backto-back promotions for Craig Brewster’s men and left the other two sides to prepare for the playoffs.

Cheltenham’s victory over Plymouth meant they took sixth place, whilst Rotherham and Oxford’s failure to win on the final day meant that Crewe’s draw against Aldershot was enough to grab the final playoff position.

Playoff fixtures: Southend v Crewe Torquay v Cheltenham

Pugh scoops Cherries gong Tom Bennett Marc Pugh picked up the top prize at the AFC Bournemouth end of season awards, as he was crowned Player’s Player of the Year on Sunday night.

The 25-year-old winger has been on scintillating form this year, and was given a number of other awards before the Cherries home victory over Preston North End on Saturday, including supporter’s player of the year.

He also picked up the Albert Einstein award (for biggest idiot) as he was tested against his fellow professionals in a series of general knowledge questions.

Pugh was handed the title after incorrectly stating that Canada had the highest population in the world and that Saturn was the closest planet to the sun.

Scott Malone was handed the worst haircut award at the annual ceremony, as voted for by the rest of the team.

Emotions ran high towards the end of the evening as Warren Cummings picked up the lifetime achievement award for his service to the club. The one-time Scotland international was almost speechless after hearing of the respect he has earned from his teammates throughout the years.

Former Manchester United manager Tommy Docherty was on hand to make an after-dinner speech in which he recalled several hilarious moments throughout his football career.

Cologne drop under a cloud

With the season across all competitions drawing to a close, it’s destination Wembley for those who can hold their nerve KOLTREGASKES

Fans of Cologne in Germany’s Bundesliga responded to their side being relegated by engulfing their stadium in black smoke.

They played their final game of the season on Saturday against Bayern Munich with a win needed to secure their top-flight status.

After striker Lukas Podolski was given an emotional sendoff before the game, ahead of his move to Arsenal, the match turned ugly.

Cologne lost 4-1 to the Champions League finalists and after Bayern’s fourth goal in the 85th minute fans let off smoke bombs all around the stadium.

Nobody could see further than five metres as the stadium was covered in thick, black smoke.

This coming weekend sees the finale of the Premier League relegation battle. I wonder if we’ll see similar scenes over here when three teams are eventually relegated?

36 sport

Thursday 10 May | The Rock

ANDREW ORMAN

Dolphins denied historic promotion Andy Mitchell

ASS’T SPORTS EDITOR Poole Town came within minutes of an historic return to the Southern League Premier Division on Bank Holiday Monday, but were foiled by ex-Portsmouth legend Steve Claridge who helped win the play-off final for Gosport Borough after extra-time.

The Dolphins, who had lead through Marvin Brooks’ first half

volley, thought they had survived a second half onslaught, but their hearts were broken a minute into injury time when 46-year-old Claridge struck after the clock had passed 90.

Justin Bennett, who hit 31 goals for Gosport in the league before his winner against Sholing in the semifinal, also bagged himself a goal in the decider before Claridge’s second wrapped the tie up for Borough just eight minutes into the additional half-an-hour.

The gut wrenching defeat left Tom

Killick’s men agonisingly close to a Premier Division return 20 years after they were relegated – since then, they have crashed through four divisions but returned through three of those in recent seasons.

The Dolphins were forced to leave Poole Stadium following that relegation in 1992 and groundshared at Hamworthy United and Holt United before being forced into parks football in the Hampshire League through trouble finding a suitable ground.

They were eventually housed back in the town on the edge of Oakdale Middle School’s field on Tatnam Road where they rebuilt the club from scratch.

Poole battled their way back to the Wessex League Premier Division and won it by a landslide 15 points in 2008-9, only to be denied promotion to the Southern League South & West because Tatnam’s facilities weren’t up to scratch.

Killick kept his side together and Town cruised their way to the title again, but still ground grading prevented them going up.

2010-11 proved to be third time lucky as the club achieved the

necessary Football Association ‘E’ ground grade to take their place in the Southern League this season.

The Dolphins were hotly tipped to challenge for promotion again, and after recovering from a rocky start and an FA Cup run, Poole improved their squad with key players like left-back Keith Emmerson, star midfielder from Dorchester Town Steve Devlin and Yeovil Town first year professional Rhys Baggridge on loan.

Town lost just two of their final 23 league matches, spanning over half a season to move from playoff outsiders to certainities with a couple of weeks of the season left.

Eight wins and a draw from their final nine league games secured second spot for a rejuvenated side, and handed Killick’s team home advantage in both play-off matches.

The first step towards promotion was taken last week by beating Hungerford Town 2-1 thanks to goals from Carl Preston (pictured celebrating the strike) and Devlin.

Monday’s final proved a bridge too far however, and the Dolphins will hope to win the league outright next season.

I don’t believe it!

Elvis lives on!

Swansea City manager Brendan Rodgers has encouraged his fans to wear as many Elvis Presley costumes as possible in their final game of the season against Liverpool next weekend.

Despite losing 2-0 to Manchester United at the weekend, Swansea have enjoyed a successful inaugral season in the Premier League that has come under much praise for their Barcelona-esque style of play.

Rodgers told BBC Sport: “Next week is going to be brilliant. I will be asking all the fans if they can wear as many Elvis Presley costumes as we can because when we got promoted the bookies said there was a greater chance of seeing Elvis Presley than us staying at this level.

“As a show of our achievement and a bit of fun we’ll ask for our supporters for that and we’ll see what their reaction is.”

Last week saw 170 Hartlepool United fans dressed as smurfs to celebrate their final game of the season and Rodgers’ idea could have been inspired by their antics.

Swansea currently sit 12th in the table going into their final game of the term.

Christchurch lift Wessex Cup Andy Mitchell

ASS’T SPORTS EDITOR Christchurch FC capped their best ever season by lifting the Sydenham’s Wessex League Cup, beating Brockenhurst 3-1 to secure the club’s first senior honour in over twenty years.

After finishing third place in the Wessex Premier with a record points total, ‘Church lost 2-0 to Bemerton Heath Harlequins in the Russell Cotes Cup final, but made no mistake this time around.

The final, played at Bemerton, was a keenly contested affair despite Brockenhurst playing a division lower than the Priory.

Graham Kemp’s side started the match well and after a clever exchange with James Burden, Mark Smith almost gave ‘Church the lead on six minutes, but his 20 shot grazed the crossbar.

Priory weren’t to be denied, and midway through the first half Sam Griffin peeled away at the far post to slam the ball under ‘keeper

Scott O’Rourke, despite appeals for an offside flag.

The match became scrappy, but Christchurch were still the better side until four minutes after the break when a spectacular strike from Warren Kenna levelled the scores – veteran Kenna saw Joe Prodomo off his line and lobbed over the ‘Church ‘keeper from 30 yards.

All of a sudden, Kemp’s players looked nervy and hesitant, but against the run of play they managed to retake the lead with 15 minutes to go, a moment that proved pivotal in the match.

Smith pinged a ball from deep into the feet of top scorer Ben Osborne who rounded O’Rourke to finish from an acute angle and turn the tide back in ‘Church’s favour.

Priory dominated the rest of the game with substitute Russell Cook twice going close to a decisive third – O’Rourke clawed his goal bound effort away before Mike Mead cleared a shot off the line.

Eventually the third arrived when Ross Lloyd bundled Paul Roberts to the ground and Osborne added a second from the penalty spot.

Christchurch FC ended their best ever season with success in the Wessex League Cup final ANDY MITCHELL