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Her Health: AN EXTRAORDINARY GIFT
AN EXTRAORDINARY GIFT
BY SHEILA HELMBERGER PHOTOS BY JOEY HALVORSON
One of the greatest marvels of modern times is that families are created in so many ways. And the right person can make the seemingly impossible become a reality for another couple.
Nine years ago, Maggie Schilling was able to do that.
When she met her husband, Troy, he had a son. The couple added two more children to their family, another son and a daughter. Maggie and Troy wanted more children of their own, but she says she had thought about becoming a surrogate for a long time, too.“
Maggie Schilling, far left, is pictured with her family, son Kaden, husband Troy, son Easton, daughter Olivia, son Avery and daughter Brynlee.
PHOTOS BY JOEY HALVORSON
It all kind of fell into place,” she says.“
At one of my checkups after my daughter was born, I mentioned to Dr. Uhlman, my OB, that I had been looking into surrogacy and asked her if she knew much about it. I had filled out some applications for some agencies already, but I hadn’t turned anything in yet. Dr. Uhlman knew a nurse practitioner at Lakewood who was working with a family that were looking for a surrogate.” She contacted the NP and let them know there was someone interested in surrogacy in the area, and the two got us connected.”
Pat and Tami had suffered heartbreak in past pregnancies. They had lost a set of twins and she delivered a baby boy that passed away. Doctors told her after an emergency surgery following complications from her last pregnancy that they were able to leave her ovaries to make it possible for her to someday use a surrogate.
Maggie Schilling gave a local couple an extraordinary gift by agreeing to be a surrogate for them.
PHOTOS BY JOEY HALVORSON
The two couples talked. They decided they were a fit. This was a journey they would take together.
Most of the agencies Maggie had talked to had been out of the Twin Cities. “I never really thought about it being someone local,” she says. “So that was exciting.” Going through one of the other agencies meant the parents could have even been from out of state. Living nearby would allow Tami to accompany Maggie to her doctor appointments and share in every step of the pregnancy.
Maggie went to their fertility clinic and had some initial medical tests done. “They had to make sure I was able to carry for them,” she says. The couple paid for a private insurance policy that would cover all of Maggie and the babies’ medical costs. Questionnaires were filled out by the two couples and visits were made together and separately with a psychiatrist. “We were asked about all kinds of issues, including how we each felt about abortion if something would be genetically wrong,” says Maggie, “It was my body but their babies, so we had to agree on different things.”
Next, Maggie started on the necessary medications and injections to help ensure a successful pregnancy.
Johnathan is the son of Tami and Pat, born via surrogacy with the help of Maggie Schilling.
PHOTOS BY JOEY HALVORSON
“We transferred an embryo they had frozen first, but that one didn’t take,” says Maggie. They tried again, using a fresh egg retrieval and two embryos. Neither of those took either. Maggie says a third time with another fresh egg retrieval transferred three embryos successfully. She was pregnant with triplets. “From the beginning we were told one of the embryos might not make it. At the first ultrasound they heard three heartbeats,” says Maggie, “but ‘Baby C’ was not as big as the others and at 12 weeks there were only two.” She was put on bedrest.
She says the support of her family was especially important in her decision to become a surrogate. “Thank goodness for my husband and my parents,” she says.
“I had two kids at home and my mom would help with our little ones during the week and take them to daycare. When my husband wasn’t working, they were home with us, but I definitely counted on him,” said Maggie.
— Maggie Schilling
The day after Thanksgiving Maggie went in for a checkup and had started preterm labor. It would still be 17 weeks before the babies were due. She was put in the hospital for a couple of days and would be in and out until mid-December, when she was admitted until the babies were born.
The morning of Dec. 23 at an ultrasound, Maggie learned she was already dilated to a six. “I was at 31 weeks,” she says. Medical personnel were nervous, but the decision was made to try to fly Maggie and the twins to Abbott Northwestern Hospital in the Twin Cities, where the parents hoped she would deliver. A Minnesota snowstorm had other plans.
They made it as far as St. Cloud before having to land. “The parents made it,” says Maggie, “My husband made it.” She landed in St. Cloud at 11 a.m. and around 4 p.m., a baby girl, Aundreia, and a baby boy,
Aundreia is the daughter of Tami and Pat, born via surrogacy with the help of Maggie Schilling
PHOTOS BY JOEY HALVORSON
Johnathon, were born. Both weighing 4 pounds, 3 ounces. Maggie was discharged the next day and was home with her own family for Christmas.
“For me, mentally,” she says, “being a surrogate was easy. From the beginning, I never felt these were my babies. When we talked about them at home with our other children, we always called them Pat and Tami’s babies. The doctors referred to them as their babies. I knew I was doing this for them.”
The twins she carried are 9 years old now. She sees photos of them and is still in touch with their mom. Since being a surrogate, Maggie and Troy have added another daughter and a son to their own family. “If you are able to do it, I really don’t think anybody would regret doing it for someone,” she says.
Sheila Helmberger lives in the Brainerd area and is a frequent contributor to Her Voice.
