Serious.Life Magazine - November 2008 by Tulsa Design Works Inc

The serious pursuit of a fulfilling, contented and happy life.

Bob Stoops: Visiting the Kids Elections & God

Living Faith: Dr. John Barnett Marriage & Money

A Changed Life: Steve Pavlina

Magazine Monday: Readers Write

www.seriouslifemagazine.com

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

SERIOUS.LIFE.MAGAZINE

NOVEMBER 2008

W W W. S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M T M

ADVERTISING@SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

SERIOUS.LIFE.MAGAZINE

NOVEMBER 2008

W W W. S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M T M

ADVERTISING@SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

inside features inside features 30 editor editor readers.talk readers.talk serious.life serious.photos 36 serious.life serious.spirit serious.money serious.pho serious.family serious.spir serious.health 42 serious.extras serious.mon serious.fam serious.hea serious.extr

8 serious.photos

Great photos and captions submitted by our readers.

12 dear.brent

Brent answers a question submitted by a reader

14 serious.spirit

Spiritual growth, answers to life and personal maturity.

18 serious.money

Each month we talk about personal finances and good money management.

22 serious.family

Great families, great relationships and great stuff about living life!

28 serious.health

Find out how to live healthy, be fit, enjoy life and take care of yourself.

Bob Stoops: Visiting the Kids

Your Editor’s daughter has been visited by Coach Bob Stoops in the hospital several times. So we asked him if he would tell us a little about his work with the kids.

Living Faith: John Barnett

In our “Living Faith” series this month we sit down with Dr. John Barnett who shares with us some incredible stories about his life and ministry.

Steve Pavlina

Widely recognized as one of the most successful personal development bloggers on the Internet, Steve Pavlina answers some of our questions about life, his and ours.

48 serious.extras

All sorts of great stuff, different topics, humor and your content.

Are you a writer or photographer?

We are always looking for people who want to contribute high quality content and photos to the magazine. Shoot me an email if you’re interested: editor@seriouslifemagazine.com

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

This is the most important page that has ever been put in a magazine. Or at least one of the most important in this magazine.

Do you have a FREE monthly subscription to Serious.Life.Magazine? www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe (we NEVER share your information, period)

Would you tell your friends about Serious.Life.Magazine?

Tell your friends about the mag and the free subscription with this easy one-click link. www.seriouslifemagazine.com/friend

Do you have some great photos?

Send them to us with a caption and we’ll print the best in our Serious.Photos section. You can include a link to your website or blog. www.seriouslifemagazine.com/photos

Are you a writer, or wish you were?

Submit your article or story, and if it’s good enough, we’ll publish it! www.seriouslifemagazine.com/writers

Do you want to advertise in Serious.Life.Magazine?

Reach a wide audience at very affordable rates with live interactive ads. Buy an ad in the PDF version, and you’ll get an ad on the website for FREE! www.seriouslifemagazine.com/advertising

Do you have a comment, suggestion or question? Send the Editor your feedback. www.seriouslifemagazine.com/contact

SERIOUS.LIFE.MAGAZINE

NOVEMBER 2008

W W W. S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M T M

ADVERTISING@SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

SERIOUS.LIFE.MAGAZINE

NOVEMBER 2008

W W W. S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M T M

ADVERTISING@SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

features editor readers.talk serious.life serious.phot serious.spiri inside features serious.mon editor readers.talk serious.fami serious.life serious.photos serious.spirit serious.heal

A Letter froM THE

What’s all this business about living a serious life? Is it being somber all time? Is sacrificing all the fun in life now for some reward in the sweet by and by?

The serious pursuit of a fulfilling, contented and happy life. Publisher Tulsa Design Works, Inc

Editor-in-Chief/Designer Brent Riggs Copy & Proofreading Carolyn Hill Terri Williams

Contributing Writers Steve Cummins David Dolan Jim Nienhuis Russ Weir

Subscriptions www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe Website www.seriouslifemagazine.com

Editor editor@seriouslifemagazine.com Advertising sales@seriouslifemagazine.com

Serious.Life.Magazine TM

Serious.Life.MagazineTM is published monthly. Reproductions in whole or in part without permission are prohibited. Serious.Life. MagazineTM is not responsible for the return of unsolicited artwork, photography or manuscripts and will not be responsible for holding fees or similar charges. All digital submissions and correspondence will become property of Serious.Life.MagazineTM. Statements made, implied or expressed in Serious.Life. MagazineTM do not necessarily represent the editorial position of the publisher.

A serious life is fun, pleasure and recreation tempered by delayed gratification that stems from the maturity of knowing that hard work, self-sacrifice and preference of others is just as important, if not more, than our own enjoyments. A serious life is contentment based on principles and eternal perspective, not on circumstances or self focus.

A serious life is the most free, most fun, most happy and most fulfilled life because it is anchored in timeless truth that transcends fickle humanity and opinion. Seriously great!

LIVING A

Brent Riggs

Editor-In-Chief

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

A serious life means having the right priorities. An outside observer of our culture would rightly surmise that pleasure, sex, money and Self are the most common priorities. For those pursuing a truly serious life, priorities look more like eternal considerations, family, character and serving others.

Comments & Feedback letters@seriouslifemagazine.com

The serious pursuit of a fulfilling, contented and happy life.

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

Cover Photo Brent Riggs

We chose the title “Serious.Life” to set us apart from all the pop-culture, image-over-substance, feel-good-but-meaningless entertainment/information that saturates media today.

serious.life serious.photos serious.spirit serious.money serious.family serious.health serious.extras

My beautiful daughter at the Guatober Fest in Myrtle Beach (Katie Nyblom)

www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe

Hurricane Ike The western sky as the

outer bands of Hurricane

Ike circled into the Houston

area on September 12, 2008.

(Donna Newell - Katy, Texas)

Soccer players celebrate a goal at a state

championship game.

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

Celebration!

>> SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

serious.life serious.photos serious.spirit serious.money serious.family serious.health serious.extras Foster Home

Our daughterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s foster

home in Guatemala.

(townsendgirl.blogspot.com)

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

A sunset in northeast Oklahoma (Jerry Palmerpalmerimages@gmail.com)

Antigua A dog waits to be let into this home in

Antiqua. Looks like

he has â&#x20AC;&#x153;knockedâ&#x20AC;? alot on this door.

(brent@brentriggs.com)

Beautiful Beautiful flowers in early spring.

W E WA N T T O P U B L I S H Y O U R G R E AT P H O T O S

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

Submit your photos online here: www.seriouslifemagazine.com/photos

We want to show everyone your great pics! Send us your best photos along with a caption, and every month, we will publish some of them for everyone to enjoy.

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

from a local park

serious.extras dear.brent

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

Dear Brent, I am in a relationship with someone I truly love but do not trust because of his previous cheating. How can I, with God’s help make this work? Should I even try? T.L. - Indiana

No, you should not try. You are not even married, and he has already shown a propensity to be unfaithful to your relationship so much so that you already state you do not trust him. You should go ahead and move on with your life. However, for me this begs bigger issues. I cannot tell you the heart ache that I routinely see in people who follow this pattern of what appears to be “pretend marriage” via dating. This almost always involves sexual activity and an equal number of “yeah but you don’t understand, we are in love, we’re going to get married”. Then get married and quit pretending that you are. People want all the benefits (that’s code for sex) but not the commitment or responsibility. There seems to be this unwritten but acceptable excuse even within the Christian community that yes, fornication is wrong, BUT if you are REALLY in love, and you REALLY plan to get married, God kind of winks at your sexual immorality. What a deception. It’s pretend marriage without the commitment.

What is your question for Brent? Send it to dearbrent@ seriouslifemagazine.com

I know that I will get laughed right off the farm but I’m still a big advocate of courting and encourage young people all the time to have their parents who love them and will not be blinded by emotions, help them evaluate and choose a worthy spouse. Courting allows people the time and opportunity in a safe environment to get to know each other before their hearts and minds are clouded by stirred up sexual desire. Involved parents help a young person during a time when they can be easily confused by emotions or physical attraction. There’s this unsaid rule in society that dating is the norm and that people must go through this cycle of

pretend marriages, breakups and sexual infidelity until they finally get married. It is the source of untold amounts of heart ache, emotional destruction and sexual ruin that does not see full harvest until later in a marriage. I realize I’m like a mosquito trying to shove a herd of elephants when it comes to this issue but hopefully one young person out there, or one set of young parents, can read it and maybe avoid the sewer trap we call “dating”. (Yes, I know... there are some Christians who go through the dating scene perfectly fine and never commit sexual sin and go on to have great marriages. But overall dating is a disaster for families and relationships if you measure the results across the board.) ~

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION

SERIOUS.LIFE.MAGAZINE

NOVEMBER 2008

W W W. S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M T M

ADVERTISING@SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

serious.photos serious.spirit Elections & God serious.money serious.family serious.health serious.extras By Brent Riggs

e are staring at an election that is probably the most polarizing in all American history. Rightly so, people are concerned about what is in store for America. Change is coming, and it doesn’t appear much of it is for the good. With that in mind, I offer you a Biblical perspective of elections and politics.

Romans 13:1 Let every soul be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and the authorities that exist are appointed by God. (NKJV)

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

Whoever gets elected is exactly who God wants elected. Sometimes, as Christians, we don’t like that and strive to find reasons we “failed” to get someone

elected. Now don’t get me wrong... we should vote, campaign and participate in our great country to elect those officials we believe will best represent God’s will for our country. However, we should never fret, fear or be anxious about the results. Paul left no wiggle room: there is NO authority except from God, and whoever gets elected was appointed by God for His reasons. Yeah, but what about when a plainly ungodly man gets elected? There are a number of reasons God allows this (and many I’m not smart enough to think of): • God may be allowing judgment to occur; this is certainly becoming more probable as our country descends into wickedness and drowns in innocent blood from murder, abortion and euthanasia

• God may use wicked rulers to refine His Church • God may be handing us over to our own desires, removing His protection; much like when Israel chose wicked Kings • God may be allowing us to “reap what we sow”

There are no doubt many other (and probably better) reasons God may “appoint” the wicked to reign over us. The point is, whoever ends up being elected tomorrow morning will be elected because God has ordained it to be so. It has become popular to “disown” any elected official you don’t like; especially the President. How often have we heard publicly some celebrity or pundit declare “he’s not MY President; I didn’t vote for him!”. This is very inappropriate for Christians. Look at what Peter tells us:

By Bob Walters Acclaimed postmodern writer David Foster Wallace, the recently deceased author of Infinite Jest, once said, “The only thing that is capital T True is that you get to decide … what you worship.” This particular truth coming from a postmodernist – someone who shuns the ideas of absolute truth or of a God who is the final arbiter of right and wrong – is astonishing. It was part of his 2005 commencement address at Kenyon College. In adult life, Wallace said, “there is no such thing as atheism. There is no such thing as not worshipping. Everybody worships. The only choice we get is what to worship. And an outstanding reason for choosing some sort of God or spiritual-type thing to worship – be it J.C. or Allah, be it Yahweh or the Wiccan mother-goddess or the Four Noble Truths or some infrangible set of ethical principles – is that pretty much anything else you worship will eat you alive.” Wallace lists money, things, our own body, beauty, intellect and sexual allure – our self-centered default settings – among that which we will unconsciously learn to worship in the absence of a conscious spiritual focus. Wallace eloquently describes how our automatic, hard-wired human selfcenteredness traps us and spiritually kills us, i.e., eats

us alive: we will fear the loss of money, the loss of beauty, power and allure, the inadequacy of not knowing everything. Wallace is saying that my conscious faith in Christ or your conscious faith in something else pulls our

You get to decide what you worship

Visit Bob’s blog at believerbob.blogspot.com/

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

human passions away from, and hence gives us freedom from, our self-centeredness – our utter focus on self, and on self as God – that was Satan’s leverage in the Garden with Adam and Eve. Wallace went on to say, “the really important kind of freedom involves … [our individual] … discipline … to care about other people and sacrifice for them, over and over, in myriad petty little unsexy ways, every day.” Unwitting as it may have been, that is an excellent description – a capital T Truth – of what Christians are supposed to be. Wallace suffered from long-term depression and committed suicide Sept. 12. I doubt he would have read so much Christian theology into his address, given that he couldn’t bring himself to spell out “Jesus Christ” (J.C.). But Jesus was unmistakably in that piece of writing. We choose what we believe. True. Choose wisely. ~

(continued next page)

What We Choose to Believe

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

1 Peter 2:13-17 Therefore submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord’s sake, whether to the king as supreme, or to governors, as to those who are sent by him for the punishment of evildoers and for the praise of those who do good. For this is the will of God, that by doing good you may put to silence the ignorance of foolish men— as free, yet not using liberty as a cloak for vice, but as bondservants of God. Honor all people. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the king. (NKJV; emphasis mine)

Spiritual Growth > Truth > Eternal Perspective

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

SERIOUS.LIFE.MAGAZINE

NOVEMBER 2008

W W W. S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M T M

ADVERTISING@SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

Our leaders would do well to heed the words of Jesus to Pilate. Pilate was proudly declaring HIS power when Jesus rightly reminded him that the only reason he had any power was because God gave it to him. I’m sure that went over well. We would see incredible change if every authority understood this principle. However, it doesn’t matter if they do, or don’t. No leader has power unless given by God; and if God gives that power, He has His reasons why. Who would have guessed that God had a reason for appointing the brutal and ruthless Pilate to lord over His people in Israel. Pilate was key player in fulfilling the most important events in world history. Who’d a figgered? (that’s “who would have figured?” for ya’ll Yankees!) We are to honor and obey our rulers. How far? Until they require us to do something that is clearly violating God’s law, precepts or principles. We have some clear examples in Scripture:

God’s law is higher than man’s. God’s authority is greater than man’s. God’s will is sovereign over man’s. So while we are to “honor the king”, we don’t “honor the king” over the

John 15:20 Remember the word that I said to you, ‘A servant is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you. If they kept My word, they will keep yours also. (NKJV)

As our society slips further into the abyss of materialism, socialism, paganism and immorality, this will only become more true, and more probable. The prudent parent and the alert church leader should recognize this and begin preparing the sheep for the wolves. We ignore this reality to our own peril (and our children’s). God is in control. God appoints ALL leaders as He wills. We are to submit and honor those leaders unless they ask us to disobey God. And it doesn’t matter whether we like it, or whether or not we voted for them.. ~

Brent Riggs is an author, mentor and Bible teacher. For Bible teaching and answers, visit his ministry website at www.seriousfaith.com

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

Acts 5.29 - the Apostles refused to stop preaching Christ Dan. 3:16-18 - Daniel and his friends refuse to bow down and worship an idol of the king Ex. 1:17; 2:1-4 - Hebrew midwives and Moses’ parents disobeyed the law about killing their sons.

King of Kings. Regardless of who is President; regardless of which party is in control... Christians above all people are to be humble citizens who set the example for all of society. Will we be “thanked” or rewarded? No. We’ll be persecuted and taken advantage of most likely. Our Master was treated much worse and He was a perfect citizen; so why should we expect different for following Him? In fact, the Bible promises this will be the case.

John 19:10-11 Then Pilate said to Him, “Are You not speaking to me? Do You not know that I have power to crucify You, and power to release You?” Jesus answered, “You could have no power at all against Me unless it had been given you from above. Therefore the one who delivered Me to you has the

greater sin.” (NKJV)

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

Peter didn’t give us any conditions or exceptions. He didn’t say “submit yourself unless you didn’t vote for the guy”; or “this is the will of God as long as the politician is a conservative”; or “Fear God and honor the King as long as the King honors God”. It would be nice (humanly speaking) to have those conditions, but we don’t. As Christians we have a higher calling which understands that God is completely in control no matter who is in the White House. Reagan, Clinton, Bush or Obama.... GOD IS IN CONTROL. Submission doesn’t mean giving up the right to dissent, disagree or work to get another person elected. That is all a part of our political process. A spirit of submission is an attitude that respects authority, not passive approval to any leader or ideology. If you’re guy is not in the White House (or headed for the White House) as you read this, and your party is not in control of the Senate, or your state... it is NOT a reason for despair, anxiety or discouragement. It simply means that you need to now direct your efforts towards trying to discover God’s will and reason for who HE appointed to rule over you.

Spiritual Growth > Truth > Eternal Perspective

serious.spirit serious.money Marriage & Money serious.family serious.health serious.extras By Brent Riggs

ere’s a question:

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

My girlfriend and I are Christians, and truly seek to have a relationship, and a marriage that is pleasing to God. She is graduating college in a year with a large amount of debt. I am already working, I have no debt, and I am saving diligently. It’s looking like I might enter into marriage with a net worth of $20k, while she’d have about $20k in student loans with little to no assets. I’m all about sharing and giving all of myself for my wifebut not an ex-wife (I’m trying to cover all bases, and prepare for the worst). I have no reason to believe that our marriage wouldn’t work, but from a stewardship point of view, I want to protect myself. Although it’s frowned upon by Christians, would a prenuptual agreement be a good idea here?

If one of you are still in college, and considering some other indicators from the rest of your question, I would say you need to wait a couple of years to consider marriage. Wait for some of the

and finances in general, you are in for big trouble. Just because she has debt (college loans?) doesn’t necessarily mean she has loose attitudes about finances, but apparently you doubt her financial discipline since you are not 100% sure your money and savings are “safe” given an impending marriage. If you are entering marriage, then “you” don’t have a net worth ALONE. Your net worth is the unconditional combination of “you” and “you” (both of you). If marrying this young lady is not worth investing your “diligent” savings in order to start your marriage debt free, then you have some growing up to do before considering marriage. While you may be good at saving, you need some work on your attitudes about a marriage and “net worth”.

I’m not sure my money will be safe with my new wife stress to be relieved, and you have some time to mature about what marriage really means, as well as develop a correct attitude about money. If you both do not have the same convictions about debt, saving

Personal Finances > Debt Reduction > Stewardship

Every mature spouse has reason to think their marriage will not work out. Your rhetoric to the contrary, you are NOT all about “sharing and giving all of myself” for your wife or the only issue you would be addressing is how fast can you write the check to become debt free to start your new marriage. What savings did you have before GOD GAVE IT TO YOU? Have you ever stopped to consider that God gave you the ability, discipline and blessing of saving that money so that you could start your marriage debt free? So that you could bless the woman who will give her life to you? So that you could demonstrate your gratitude to God by considering that money GOD’s, and asking HIM what you should do with it? Another if.... if your wifeto-be is obviously financially undisciplined, why are you considering marriage to her at all at this time? Why aren’t you pursuing financial education as a couple with something like Dave Ramsey’s program? You should have EVERY reason to believe your marriage “won’t work”. Every mature and smart spouse does. This is the naïve thinking of the young and inexperienced. Stress over money, in-laws, sex, work, family, friends, children... there are myriads of reasons why it is possible your marriage “won’t work” and you should be alert to all of them. Your desire for a Godly marriage does not make you immune to adultery, abandonment or a broken

home. The first and primary reason that should concern you that your marriage “won’t work” is the attitude you are displaying about finances and “oneness”... before you’ve even popped the question. Prenups are frowned upon by Christians for a reason. They display an innate misunderstanding of marriage and are selfishness cloaked in “good stewardship” in all but the most extraordinary cases. All of this may sound very harsh,

(continued page after next, right side)

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference. Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

serious.spirit serious.money I Am Falling and serious.family I Fear I Can’t Get Up serious.health serious.extras

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

ou are not alone. In today’s pending economic crisis this is the feeling of many Americans. Many came into what they felt was the acquisition of the “American Dream” which meant home ownership, a car, and a white picket fence (or whatever your preference). Inflated appraisals on homes, sub-prime loans and variable loans that inflated faster than the homeowner could have foreseen caused thousands of foreclosures. According to the Washington Post, between July and September of this year, 2,700 homes went into foreclosure a day. That is up over 1000 homes a day from a year ago. More than 4 million homeowners with a mortgage were at least one month behind on their payments at the end of June. According to the Mortgage Bankers Association, a record 500,000 homeowners had entered the foreclosure process. This is a crisis. People feel like they have fallen and can’t get up. This has especially impacted homeowners and investors in what was considered “hot markets” like

helped the market in South Carolina stay pretty steady is the real estate market kept at a 5 percent increase a year despite the excitement in other states. The bottom line is high appraisals caused people to carry a strong spirit that a home was an investment, future money in the bank, rather than a place to live and call home. Most people do not stay in their home for 30 years and many thought they would sell and make a profit before the variable rate would even change. Many Americans were caught off guard. Now they are experiencing a loss due to the drop in value. They have fallen and feel they can’t get up. As America continues to be a transitional country due to career changes, family needs and sudden tragedy, they find themselves having to sell their home sooner than expected and the market is not in their favor. A plummeting economy has brought the unemployment rate to 6.1 percent and people can no longer keep their financial commitments. They too have fallen and feel they cannot get up. Is there a happy ending to this story? Yes! Communication is key in any relationship…personal or in

is there a happy ending to this story? Florida, California, Nevada and Arizona. According to an active realtor in South Carolina, appraisals in these hot markets were inflated up to 20% a year. She said what has

business. Communicate with your lender before it is too late. Discuss options like deferred payment plans, maybe lowering your interest rates. Your lender wants you to succeed. If you have fallen, let them help you discover ways to help you get up. ~

About the Author: OceanView Investment Services Corporation is the parent company of OceanViewEquity. com and its affiliate websites. Since founded, our top goals and priorities have been to maintain the integrity of service we provide and the guaranteed satisfaction of our users and customers alike. We provide Borrowers nationwide with a service geared to make the loan process as stress-free and simple as possible. Our Lenders and brokers across the country are given accounts to access borrower information and make successful loans.

Personal Finances > Debt Reduction > Stewardship

Marriage & Money... cont’d.

and even a little too blunt (not “loving, like Jesus” is what we hear today) but look at it this way: if a little hardnosed advice today and being ticked off at me saves you 75 years of marital misery and a couple of divorces... I’d say that’s a pretty good bargain. Before considering marriage: • You both need to get some very Biblical and in-depth marriage preparation from a Godly, mature couple. • You both need to complete a Biblical financial program. I recommend Dave Ramsey. To proceed into marriage with your current attitude about money and matrimony is going to very likely result in a marriage that “won’t work”. If you REALLY do seek a marriage that is “pleasing to God” then run this advice by several spiritually mature Godly adults and see if they concur. You have nothing to lose and a lifetime of happy marriage to gain. ~

Brent Riggs teaches people about getting out of debt, reducing expenses, increasing income and being a good steward of finances on his blog: www.brentriggs.com

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference. Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

serious.money serious.family Grandma Hodge serious.health serious.extras By Steve Cummings

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

he year was 1978 when my Grandma Hodge came to live at our house. She had long flowing white hair that she wore up in a bun until bedtime, and then it spread across her shoulders and down her back like a heavy snow that had fallen quietly during the dark of night. I used to be amazed by her nightly transformation. By the time Grandma Hodge moved in with us, my four older sisters and two older brothers had already married and moved out, leaving my parents and me to occupy a once chaotic but happy 1300 square feet, three-bedroom, one bath house. That’s right, nine people and only one bathroom. There was never a dull moment growing up in that home. Grandma Hodge was already well into her 80s by the time she moved in with us. I was 14 going on 18 and thought my grandmother was the grandest person in the world. Just like yesterday, I can remember her giving me a couple of dollars and saying, “Now you walk down to the store and buy me a jar of Bruton snuff and a block of chocolate, and you can have the change to buy whatever you want.” I always liked the traditional RC Cola and a Moon Pie. My mother was the fourth of Grandma’s 11 children. Grandma

and my Grandpa Asa had raised all their children in a poor coal mining camp in Alabama called Sloss Holler. Grandpa Asa died the year I was born, so I never got to know him except through the stories that Grandma so often told me about him. She remained faithful to Asa Hodge long after he had died. I can still hear her say, “Asa Hodge is the only man I’ll ever love.” He was her favorite thing to talk about, and I loved to listen. Although I never knew him, to this day I feel like I know him well because of the stories she told me about him. By the time Grandma Hodge died, she had close to 100 children and great- grandchildren. She loved them all and they all loved her. She was highly respected for her unconditional love and wisdom. Oh, the lessons about life she taught us all. Of course, I was her favorite grandchild. Well, that’s what she always told me. I believed it too, until the day of her funeral when I found out that she had told all of her grandchildren that each of them was her favorite. We were all a little disappointed to learn the truth. She knew how to make you feel special. The few brief years Grandma Hodge shared her life with us were priceless. The things I learned from her have served me well through the years, especially as it relates to marriage and family. Many of my parenting skills came from Grandma Hodge. Love and wisdom just oozed out of her. It seemed like every word she uttered was memorized

Marriage > Parenting > Communication > Recreation

We have lost much in our society by marginalizing the grayed. from some book of wisdom and was rehearsed numerous times before she ever said it. It is unfortunate that the hoary head is not respected as in days gone by. We have lost so much by marginalizing and dismissing our wise elders in this modern era. Instead, the focus today is often on the young and beautiful, the worship of the body instead of the person. Gone are the days of two and three generations living together under one roof, with each generation learning about what is important in

life from the previous generation. When an elderly person dies, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s kind of like a library burning to the ground, and thousands of volumes are lost. However, people like Grandma Hodge are such rare volumes that they live on through us our entire lifetime. ~

Steve Cummings is a full-time minister and life strategies coach, who conducts family and communication workshops, instructing people on how to improve all aspects of their interpersonal relationships. Email Steve: steve@tusculum.org

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference. Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

serious.money serious.family Parenting The Wayward serious.health serious.extras By John Barnett

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

ne of the greatest challenges in life is raising children. After years of combing through every verse of the Bible dozens of times, I still haven’t found the perfect family—a family with a godly dad, a godly mom, and children who are submissive their entire time at home, and grow up to move on into godly marriages and homes. This just isn’t recorded in the Bible. What we do find in God’s Word are some godly parents who have both godly and ungodly children; we also find some ungodly parents who have all ungodly children, while other ungodly parents end up with some godly children. There just doesn’t seem to be a parenting pattern that always works. So what is the answer for us as we parent? When God blesses us with children, He asks us to give them back to Him in dedication. That is what Christ’s parents did way back in Luke 2:22. That is also what godly parents have done through the centuries. But what happens when we

dedicate them and they don’t turn out as we had hoped and planned? To answer that very relevant question, look with me again at the entire process of child rearing: Christian parenting and our stewardship of the precious lives of our children. When we as parents present our children in dedication back to the Lord, we are declaring: “These children belong to You, Lord.” Dedication is our public acknowledgement of God’s ownership of them (Psalm 127:3). We can then rest in the joyful reality of being stewards of the promises of God’s Word. The Bible repeatedly records godly men and women with less than godly children. That is because godliness is a choice; it is an obedient response to the Lord. Godly children can not be made; nor can godliness be forced upon them. They grow that way, by God’s grace, with—or sometimes even without—godly parenting. The bottom line of Scripture is that God never holds us responsible for how our children turn out—only for how we raised them. So let me remind you again of the truths parents affirm when they hold up their precious children to the Lord in dedication of themselves to godly parenting as stewards of their children for the Lord: I will raise the children God gives me for His glory; I will surrender them back to Him; I will have His peace when it is hard, and when they are making their own choices that will shape their future lives; I

Marriage > Parenting > Communication > Recreation

God never holds us responsible for how our children turn out. will always pray for them, always love them, and no matter what happens—I will have God’s peace because I gave them to Him—and raised them for Him as best as I knew how and could do. Whatever place you are in your parenting— anticipating children, in the midst of raising children, sorrowing over a wayward child, or looking back over wonderful (or not so wonderful) years of parenting— why not go over these dedication truths in your own hearts as parents? If you have surrendered your children to the Lord already,

then reaffirm in your heart these five simple truths: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

I raised the children You gave me as my very own; I surrendered them back to You; I will have Your peace when it is hard, and when they are making their own choices that will shape their future lives; I will always pray for them, always love them, never give up on them or You; and no matter what happens— I will have Your peace because

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

>> SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference. Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

SERIOUS.LIFE.MAGAZINE

NOVEMBER 2008

W W W. S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M T M

ADVERTISING@SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

Marriage > Parenting > Communication > Recreation

Parenting... cont’d. I gave them to You, and raised them for You as best as I knew how and could do. If you are a believing parent, and your child has gone astray from the Lord, how should you respond to a wayward child? What comfort is there for parents when this happens? What hope can we have after all the years we loved them, earnestly prayed for them, read God’s Word to them, nurtured them in the ways of the Lord, and sought to guide them as best we could? Here are some truths that comfort our hearts—and the hearts of the many parents we have encouraged over the years:

A Wayward Child . . .

feet firmly planted on the Solid Rock (Psalm 40:12)! 11. A wayward child challenges us to never give up on him or her. In one of the darkest hours in my job as a dad, I sat with one of my children watching a movie. One line, which was clearly stated twice by Alfred the butler to Master Bruce, will always stay etched in my mind: “So you haven’t given up on me yet?” To which the butler answered resoundingly, “NEVER!” I challenge you to say the same in your own heart, to your partner, and by your actions toward a wayward child all your life—Never will I give up on you, for God will never give up on me!

John Barnett has been teaching the Word of God for 31 years and is currently the Senior Pastor at Calvary Bible Church in Kalamazoo. Email John: jb@dtbm.org

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

I hope that these truths will give you strength when the parenting path gets rough— whether for a moment, or a few weeks or months, or even for the rest of your life. Beloved, God is faithful, so never stop trusting Him—and never cease waiting upon Him! Remember: Faithful prayer, in step with God’s plan in His Word, is God’s most powerful key to unlock children’s hearts as we disciple them for Christ. ~

A wayward child is no surprise to God. Every day of our life (Psalm 139) was written in His book—even the darkest of days! A wayward child is an opportunity for God to see our response. Our response is what matters to God most. He is watching and waiting for what we will do, to whom we will turn—and when we turn to Him, our Lord is glorified. A wayward child drives us to pray for what we may think is impossible—their return to the Lord and us.

A wayward child opens to us a situation where only God can encourage us in times like this (I Samuel 30:6b)! 5. A wayward child fills us with hope as we remember that God isn’t ever through with us as long as we live—and neither is He ever through with our wayward child. 6. A wayward child reminds us we have a perfect heavenly Father as we see our own imperfections reflected by our children. 7. A wayward child humbles us as we remember how often we also have failed our children (Psalm 130:3), and failed to respond correctly to our perfect Father. 8. A wayward child rebukes us because we expected so much obedience from our imperfect parenting, yet we ourselves gave our heavenly Father such imperfect obedience— even though His parenting was perfect! 9. A wayward child makes us believe more and more each day that God is able to do that which we could never do: touch their hearts, soften their hearts, and turn their hearts back to Him (Ezekiel 36:26-27)—and to us. 10. A wayward child shows us God’s never ending grace as each wave of fear and sorrow rolls over us, but we find our

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

serious.family serious.health Wonders of Epson Salt serious.extras

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

psom salts are named for the mineral rich waters of Epsom, England, where they were known at least as far back as Shakespeareâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s day. When bathing, the magnesium sulfate (Epsom salt) is absorbed through the skin and is an inexpensive and natural way to reduce stress, treat skin problems, and draw toxins from the body. Epson salt has been a long time remedy natural remedy for a number of ailments. An Epson salt bath is known to relieve aching limbs, muscle strain and back pain. In addition, it has been known to heal cuts, reduce soreness from childbirth and relieves colds and congestion. Furthermore, Epson salt will flush toxins and heavy metals from the body. Epson Salt is a natural stress reliever too. Stress drains the body of magnesium. An Epson salt bath absorbs magnesium into our body thus helping to relieve stress. The magnesium helps to produce adequate amounts of serotonin, a mood-elevating chemical within the brain that creates a feeling of calm and relaxation. Epson salt has many uses, as an all body exfoliate to remove dead skin cells and promote circulation, as a foot soaking agent to smooth, relax and refreshes your feet and neutralize odors, and as a facial

exfoliate. Below are some easy skin care recipes using Epson salt. The cost is minimal yet very beneficial for your skin. Just Like the Spa! Massage a handful of Epsom Salt mixed with 1-tablespoon bath oil or olive oil and rub all over wet skin to cleanse exfoliate and soften the rough spots! Rinse well. Note recommended on freshly shaved legs. Easy Facial Cleanser: Mix Â˝ Tsp of Epsom Salt into cleansing cream for a deep-pore cleansing. Massage on skin. Rinse with cool water. Pat dry. Epsom Salt Detox Bath Recipe 1 Cup Epsom salt 1 handful sea salt 2 Tablespoons bath oil Pour the ingredients into the tub while the tub is filling. Epson salt has wonderful properties and uses that are beneficial to the mind, body, and soul. In addition, the cost of a box of Epson salts is so minimal compared to all the fancy packaged skin care products, that you can indulge yourself as much as you like. For those people that suffer from high blood pressure, heart problems, or diabetes, you should consult your doctor prior to using an Epson salt bath. Additionally, the information provided above is not intended to replace the care or advice of a physician if you suffer from skin disorders, severe stress or anxiety, or other health problems. ~ Carol Belanger, author of 300+ Skin Care Recipes

Fitness > Healthcare > Diet > Lifestyle

Brittle Nails – Causes & Symptoms Brittle nails are usually not associated with a medical disease. Brittle fingernails are a common condition, occurring in about 20% of people; more women than men develop brittle nails. Brittle nails usually break or peel off in horizontal layers, starting at the nail’s free end. The signs and symptoms of brittle nails include: • peeling at the nail tips • easy breaking • inability to grow the nails out What Causes Brittle Fingernails? Everyone has brittle nails to some extent, some more than others. Aging can cause slowed nail growth and dull, brittle, or yellowish nails as the flow of moisture and natural oils to the nail bed declines. A lack of moisture or too much moisture can worsen an already brittle condition. Dry heat, detergents, nail polish remover, or harsh chemicals encourage cracked and dry brittle nails. On the other hand, too much moisturizer, hand lotion and a lot of time underwater leaves nails too soft for tearing. The nutrition for dry, brittle nails includes the establishment of a healthy diet and ways that continuously enhance the condition of the brittle nails of the person and the increasing desire to stay away from fatty, junk foods.

Dry, brittle nails is a problem that thousands of women face. Nails dry-out in the winter time because of intense hand washing to stay healthful and because of all the dry air that is around generated as a result of heaters. Health Nutrition aids to control your fingernail health and provide a cure for dry, brittle nails. A inadequacy of B-complex vitamins, specifically biotin, will create ridges along the nail bed. A diet deficient in calcium inflicts to dry,

brittle nails. Quite a number of vitamins and minerals have been proposed for the prevention of brittle nails. Refrain from biting your nails. To help, kick this habit keep nails short, and paint them with a dark coloured polish. (Every-time you bite you’ll be conscious of chipping the polish). www.articlesbase.com/ nutrition-articles/brittle-nailscauses-symptoms-and-healthynutrition-tips-372616.html

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference. Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

Bob Stoops:

Visiting the Kids At Children’s Hospital

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

By Brent Riggs

n July 2008, our three year old daughter Abby, adopted from Guatemala, was diagnosed with Leukemia. Since then, we have been simply and utterly amazed at the goodness and tenderhearted care that has come from every direction. Whether at home or in the hospital, there is a never ending stream of people asking how Abby is doing, asking how they can help our family, visiting, cooking, anticipating our needs and offering assistance. We are relative new-comers at a large church in Norman, and yet countless people have brought us meals, provided baby-sitting and continue to dream up ways to help us care for Abby. The nurses at the hospital have been kind, helpful and accommodating. Many of them are Christians, and all of them have been warm and loving to Abby. Even the “mean” one, Nurse Betty, is just a softy down deep and treats Abby like her own. People from all over the world who we’ve never laid eyes on send cards and gifts. There are hundreds of blogs, websites and families praying for Abby. There is rarely a day goes by that we don’t see, or hear about, someone doing something kind for us, praying for us or volunteering to do something to help us care for Abby. It’s seems like there is nothing quite

like a sweet little child getting sick that brings out the best in humanity. So it was a pleasant surprise, but not a big surprise one day, to see Coach Bob Stoops walk into the hospital room. It seems that even head coaches of top ten college football teams have soft hearts for suffering children. Coach Stoops frequently visits the children at the OU Children’s hospital yet you wouldn’t know it unless you were one

of the families there. When I contacted his office to request the interview, I was told in no uncertain terms that he did not do interviews about his charitable work. It’s hard to fault someone for his humility. However, I persisted and informed them that we were not a sports magazine and that the article would be about helping the children. Much to my surprise, I received a call a couple days

later saying that Coach Stoops had agreed to an interview! Brent: Coach Stoops, thanks for visiting with us today, and first let me personally say, as a dad, thank you for visiting my daughter Abby on several occasions. Coach Stoops: I’ve enjoyed visiting her. I think I’m going to be up there again tomorrow and hope to see her.

Brent: Well, thankfully, she’s actually not in the hospital for a change. So she’ll miss getting to see you, but I know we are all happy that she’s at home and doing well right now. Coach Stoops: Well I’m glad to hear that good news. Let’s hope she’s not there very much at all in the future.

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

>> SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

SERIOUS.LIFE.MAGAZINE

NOVEMBER 2008

W W W. S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M T M

ADVERTISING@SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

yet continue to have hope and to give their lives to care for their children. My players really have the opportunity to see what it’s like to be selfless and courageous by going with me on these visits. Brent: From your experience visiting the kids, what would you say to other people about getting involved in helping the families of these children and what they could do for the kids themselves? Coach Stoops: I think as much as anything, it’s spending the time to get to know them and learning to relate to them and what they are going through, letting them know that you’re thinking of them, that they are important and special, and encouraging them to continue the fight and not to give up hope. I would tell them to encourage the families to stay hopeful and positive even in the face of such great difficulty. I would tell them that prayer is a great help for all involved no matter what situation.

Can you think of any specific examples or times when the players have really learned something by joining on those visits and seeing the children? Coach Stoops: Off the top of my head I can’t really think of any specific instances, but I don’t think there’s any doubt that they learn a lot and they develop an empathy for others when they see the kind of difficulties and struggles that the kids are going through. As young men they realize that if they ever get to feeling bad about themselves, all you have to do is go visit these kids who are dealing with real difficulty and trials, and then you realize you really don’t have all that much to feel bad about. It’s obvious that the players and myself are genuinely inspired by the courage that is on display by these children who are in a fight for their lives. Brent: Have any of the players made any comments about the visits that stick out in your mind? Coach Stoops: Again not any specifics, but each of the players at different times will reach a point where they are inspired by what they see and really develop their own character by seeing how much hope and joy is in the lives of those precious little kids who aren’t even sure they’ll survive. They see the same thing from many of the families of these children who often are more aware of the seriousness of the situation

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

Brent: Well, I know you’re busy with the football season, so let me get right to the questions I wanted to ask you. How did you and your wife get started visiting the children at the hospital? Coach Stoops: I don’t remember exactly, it started a long time ago. It was way back in probably about 2000 when I first met Kay Tanger, a volunteer who is at the hospital a lot and knows everything that goes on up there. She knows a lot of the families and many of the children at the hospital and had been going to visit and volunteer for quite a long time. Kay knew all the nurses and all of the staff and knew her way around, and with her help I got started visiting the children and have been doing it ever since. Brent: Whenever you come to visit, you bring one of your players. When did they start coming with you and how did all of that get started? Coach Stoops: As I began to make the visits on a regular basis, it was just a matter of informing the players and letting them know that the opportunity was available for them to join me in visiting the children. Of course it wasn’t real easy for them to make time between all of the classes, activities and football, but I just let them know that they were welcome to come with me, and many of them took me up on the offer. Every Thursday or Friday that I’ve made plans to go, I tell them they can either ride with me or meet me there and we would go up and see the children together. Brent:

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

SERIOUS.LIFE.MAGAZINE

NOVEMBER 2008

W W W. S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M T M

ADVERTISING@SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

article without me (laughs). Brent: Well, I’ve got more than enough from you to help encourage others to help. I’m more than grateful that you’ve taken a few minutes to share your thoughts with us today. Thanks a lot, Coach Stoops, and best wishes for the rest of the football season. Coach Stoops: Thank you. I was glad to visit with you. Say “hi” to Abby for me.

programs, not just Children’s Hospital. So I would say that anything related to those events, the Children’s Hospital or the Oklahoma University Medical Center, would end up benefiting these children.

>> SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

Brent: Do you have any final words you want to say as we end the interview? Coach Stoops: To be honest, it’s really kind of a hard topic for me to talk about. It’s not really my nature or personality to want to go around and talk about my charitable work or what I do for others, especially to the media. So you have to figure out a way to write a lot of your

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

Brent: Coach, are you involved in any charitable organizations or events that you would like to let our readers know about? Coach Stoops: I am involved in several specific things, but I would say that anything you can do to help the Children’s Hospital is going to benefit all of the kids there. We have the Bob Stoops Champions Foundation that is run through our office, and we have two events a year, a golf tournament and a bowling tournament on different dates. Those events support children’s organizations both in Norman and Oklahoma City, all sorts of different children’s

---------Every day we continue to learn a new life lesson as we care for Abby and see the goodness it brings out in other people like Coach Stoops. I remember thinking on his first visit, “If a guy like that with so much responsibility and such a busy schedule can still make time to go and visit, encourage and help some little kids (who don’t even know Bob Stoops or what in the world an Oklahoma Sooner is), then anybody can make time to do it.” I know there are a lot of people constantly tugging at your heartstrings for different causes. There is a lot of need in this hurting world. All I can tell you from my own personal experience is that there is really nothing like the joy and inspiration you receive when you witness these little kids fighting a life or death battle and yet they still smile when you smile, laugh when you laugh and find sincere joy in the simplest of honest pleasures. They have short memories and deep hearts. It is truly a tangible lifechanging lesson that confirms Jesus was right when He said we should all strive to be more like the little children. ~

Living Faith: John Barnett

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

J 36

The Word-Filled Man

ohn Barnett is an amazing man. Although he is one of the gentlest men you’ll ever meet, tender-hearted and patient, don’t mistake that for a lack of courage, conviction or toughness. He is a man’s man, fiercely loving his wife, caring for his large family with selfless devotion and willing to take risks for his faith that would have most of us shrinking in hesitation. It’s my pleasure to sit down and interview him for our “Living Faith Series” where we discover the lives of men and women whose faith overflows into lives all around them. Serious.Life: John, it’s really great to talk with you. Before I ask you few questions, I know you’re constantly on some adventure, so what have you been up to recently? John: We’ve been over in Scotland for the last couple of weeks, and that’s where I pretty much lost my voice. They don’t heat things over there, and it’s quite an experience to be in those cold stone buildings. So I’ve been fighting a cold and losing my voice since we got back. I was there preaching in the church that Dwight L. Moody started, and they are still faithfully reaching out to the community of Edinburgh. It’s

really amazing because what you see there is a church filled with either twenty-somethings or senior citizens. The two or three generations in between have basically been lost to the church in that area which is common all over Europe. So even as I was giving a message to an audience full of young people with tattoos and earrings, they were all very sincere and zealous about their faith. On Saturday they wanted to have a marathon teaching session, and so I taught them for five hours straight with just a few minutes break here and there. There were all sorts of children and young adults eagerly waiting to hear as much as I would teach them. It’s good to know that a generation of Christians are alive and well in a country where the official church (Church of Scotland) is expected to be

extinct by the year 2012. They are shutting down churches and selling off property at an amazing rate. Serious.Life: Well John, tell us a little bit about how you grew up, your family life, who influenced you and your spiritual background. John: I grew up in a small town in Pennsylvania happy as can be until I was old enough to realize that my parents were extremely unhappy. Starting at about age 6, my parents were emotionally separated and lived completely separate lives even within the house, but they always remained totally committed to staying married and raising us in a Christian household. There were lots of fights, screaming, even breaking some dishes, and it was routine turmoil inside of our home. My dad built an apartment down in the basement of her home, and while we all lived in the same structure, my parents literally lived in separate homes inside of our home. Divorce was never an option, they just lived their lives and existed under the same roof. No matter how much they didn’t get along, they still agreed that we needed to be raised in a Christian home, read the Bible and serve the Lord. Of course that was a real paradox for me as they would scream and yell at each other all the way to church but once inside the church gave

no indication of what was really going on in our family. Witnessing them live that way really caused me to want to make sure that my marriage was not like that. They caused me to go looking for mentors and other examples that could show me what God really

Christian author. At the time of hearing him, I had drifted away from the Lord and was pursuing many different business opportunities. Jim preached a sermon about wasting your life and wasting the opportunities that God has for us to serve him. So on that

meant for a family to be like. One good source of those examples was missionaries that we routinely hosted and cared for in our home. I would get to meet these wonderful people and couples, and through that God provided me with real living examples of good relationships and families. One of the missionaries, named Silas Fox, had a deep impact on my life because he taught the Bible even though he was blind. He could quote every text that he taught and had memorized incredible amounts of Scripture. I asked him about it one time, and he told me that he believed you should never teach the Bible until you have read it at least one time more than your age and continue to read the Bible every year of your life. That began my lifelong habit of reading the Bible through at least once a year. Another person who made a big impact on my life at that time was a fella by the name of Jim Berg who has since become a very successful

day in 1975, I resurrendered my life to God’s calling and headed off to Bible school. I was 19 years old and was doing quite well for that age professionally, but I sold it all and went to school, and that’s where I met John MacArthur. Serious.Life: John, before you move on I wanted to ask you whether or not you saw your parents’ decision to raise you in a Christian home despite the discord and their living separate lives... did you see that as hypocritical or as a sacrifice? John: As a young person I wobbled back and forth between the two viewpoints. Sometimes I saw it as very hypocritical and wanted no part of it, and at other times I saw it as an admirable sacrifice on their parts to want to stay together for the sake of us kids and raise us in a Christian home. All of my close relatives growing up were divorced, so it would have been very easy for them to get divorced as well. It would not have

My Parent’s were a paradox to say the least

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

>> SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

(continued next page)

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

Living Faith, cont’d.

caused much of a ripple in our extended family. My parents specifically and directly told us frequently that they were committed to staying together so that we would not be from a broken home and would be raised as Christians. As the years went by, my parents fought less and less, but they still lived separate lives. We were all together in our home, but they lived completely physically and emotionally apart from each other. No one at church knew they had a problem. They would sit together, serve together in different ministries and spend their summers doing missions work, and no one had a clue that they were completely emotionally detached. They never had a relationship their entire lives, which was tragic. Serious.Life: Well they’re sacrificing conviction certainly flies in the face of today’s common thinking where people think their personal happiness is the first priority on God’s list. I cannot tell you the number of people I know who are divorced for the sole reason that their spouse was not happy and was convinced that a loving God would not want them to spend their whole life being unhappy. John: Yeah, looking back I have a lot of admiration for them and their determination to stay together despite their own personal feelings. The lesson is clear for us by looking at them that the Lord does not promise to solve all of our unhappiness

or incompatibilities. What God is after is our obedience and submission, and while we may spend a lifetime on this earth being unhappy, God will reward us for all eternity for our commitment to the truth. I can see now the race so differently, and their experiences in life were so incompatible that they really had no chance of ever being happy. Because of that, I am very careful to counsel people before they get married to make sure they really know the person and really evaluate whether or not their lifestyles and expectations are compatible. After my mom died, my dad totally focused his life on serving the Lord and evangelism. He died last December, but until his death he was very active was and every day was able to tell people about Jesus. Even at 82 years old, he lived in a small house that was at the center of a large suburban area that built up around him.

He made it a point to knock on every door of every house and visit every family in the neighborhood to share the Gospel with them. Through his efforts, many people and families in the community came to know God. He was truly a model to me of Psalm 92 that talks about growing old in the Lord. Serious.Life: So you went off to college, and you met John MacArthur and began a lifetime of ministry. Tell us more about that... John: John MacArthur and I became friends, he invited me to come to church, and from that day until now has been a faithful mentor to me. It was through John’s influence and his teaching that I gained my insights into ministry and shaped the model that is still followed today. It was also at that time that I met my wife Bonnie. Growing up in such a stressful house, I never dated

a girl more than once in high school or college. I always pray that God would send me the right girl. The same friend that introduced me to John MacArthur also informed me one day that he had a girl he wanted me to go out with. I asked him her name, but he told me just to go out with her and he would tell me more about her later. I remember the very first time we met, she opened the door, and I looked in her eyes and said to myself, but not her, “This is the girl I have been praying for.” I didn’t tell her that until the next night. Serious.Life: So you at least waited one whole entire day? John:

children; two are in graduate school, two are in college, and the other four, whom we refer to as “the buddies,” live at home and our homeschooled. Serious.Life: You talk about a couple of people who were influential in your early life. What about now? Who is influential currently in your life and ministry? John: Well, by far I still have to say that John MacArthur is the most influential person in my life. To this day he is my mentor and advisor and shapes my ministry and teaching. John has been influential in letting me know about each of the churches that I’ve been a pastor at and

honestly say that you never gave up on me, lost sight of how I could be useful for God and never failed to give me encouragement and hope for the future. John: It was my blessing because through all the troubles you had personally and in some of your business relationships, I saw that you never lost your passion to learn more about God and communicate it to others. You were like Jeremiah going through a really difficult stretch in your life, and I never failed to see the Lord’s light shining through your life unlike some of those who were being very self-righteous towards you. Serious.Life: I learned a lot from you during that time in watching your example about how you never give up on someone and never write them off as hopeless or useless. John, I know you have a lot of incredible stories and great memories you can share. What are a couple of the most interesting? John: In the late 70s, I was asked to take a team into Morocco, the heart of Islam, to deliver a trailer full of Bibles. World Radio had been transmitting into the Islamic countries, and they had over 6000 requests for the Scriptures. They assembled our team, and we had a trailer full of Bibles being hauled by a big van as

I waited one day to tell her she was the one.

>> SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

many opportunities that I’ve had over the years. I still speak with him routinely, meet with him when possible and covet his advice and example. It is my personal prayer that someday I’ll be mentoring and helping to guide the lives of men in the same way that John has faithfully mentored me for 27 years. Serious.Life: I can certainly relate to what you’re saying, John, as you yourself have been extremely influential in my life. Through the roughest part of my history and what appeared to be my worst failures, I can

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

Yes, the very next day I told her I thought she was a girl I’ve been praying for. Of course I assume she thought I was nuts, and I was scared I might run her off, but she stuck around. So we met in May, got engaged in July and married in December of that same year. We immediately went to a ministry in California and had our first two children, Johnny and Estelle. Then we moved to Rhode Island where I pastored for five years, and there we had James, Julia and Joseph. After that, it was in Oklahoma where Jeremiah, Elisha and Elizabeth were born. We have eight

(continued next page)

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

Living Faith, cont’d.

we drove through Europe over land and took a ferry into Morocco. I was 21 years old at the time and didn’t know how scared I should have been. Everyone in the team got violently ill with the flu almost to the point where we couldn’t walk, and we were concerned about being able to continue. Looking back, I realize that the Lord used the flu to really humble us and open our eyes to what He was going to do. As we approached the border to Morocco, we saw that every single car was thoroughly searched. All cargo, suitcases, the insides of the cars, the trunks and anything you were carrying was being opened up and very carefully examined by border guards. As I pulled up to the checkpoint, I started to open the door but felt it bump against something. As I turned to look out the window, I noticed the guards standing there. He had his knee against the door keeping me from opening it, and all he did was take out his hand and say, “Passport.” So I got my passport, and he took a quick look at it and waved us through, trailer and all, without searching one single thing. We found out later on that we had reached the border right at the moment they were changing work shifts, and the guard did not want to get off late so he was waving people through without checking them. That was amazing enough, but the most amazing was still to come. Of course everything there is written in Arabic, and all we had was a piece of

paper that gave the name of some man we were supposed to meet. We were told that he would be in the city of Fez, but other than that had no address or other information. So we drove to the city, and all we needed to do was take turns praying and asking God to direct us to the man we were looking for. We drove around making various turns and going down different streets, and when it finally came time for me to pray, I suggested that we simply pull over and stop and pray until God clearly directed us what to do. So there we were sitting in this narrow alley, parked next to the curb with our van and our trailer praying that God would give us direction. After a few minutes, a man walked up and tapped on our window. We rolled it down, and he said to us, “I have been waiting for you. I have been praying that God would send you to me.” God had led us to park right in front of the apartment where the man lived who we were looking for. Not only that, but all this occurred at a time when the evening Muslim call to prayer was happening. This distraction allowed us to carry the Bibles up to his apartment without being noticed because everyone was in their home or business praying. God answered our prayer and brought us exactly to the right location at exactly the right time even though we had nothing more than this man’s name to go on. I believe that we will be blessed to meet in heaven many people who came to know God because

of those Bibles that were delivered by God’s hand. It was because of this event that my faith in God was completely solidified and I realized that no matter what He called us to do, He will help us to do what He has asked. There would be many times throughout my life after that event where Bonnie and I would step out in faith and do something we felt led by God to do and knew beyond doubt that God would provide and give us the way to accomplish what he was leaving us to do. Serious.Life: Over the course of your life and all that you’ve experienced, how has your view of life and people changed? John: I am more confident now that God can say, change and use anyone regardless of his background or history. I keep running into more and more people who earlier in my ministry life I may have thought would never come to the Lord or didn’t appear to have any hope of ever getting their lives straightened out. All the time I see people who hear the simple gospel and their lives are radically changed no matter how bad it may appear at that point. They are not perfect by any means, but the change is very real and they began to transform before your eyes. Instead of hoping for and looking for the perfect church, the perfect ministry opportunity, and the perfect Christian people to be a part of it, I now realize that God will surprise me at who He will use

to accomplish His will. God can change anyone who wants to change regardless of how messed up they have been. Serious.Life: This series is about “living faith.” What does that phrase mean to you? John: The apostle Peter wrote about living faith in a time of great suffering. Living faith is becoming more of an issue and more of a need every day as the world moves farther and farther away from anything resembling God. Living faith is the knowledge that our inheritance is incorruptible and that no matter what happens in this life we view things with an eternal perspective. A living faith does not fade away and is not hidden. My challenge to your readers would be that no matter what comes our way - a global recession, socialism or

persecution - we have a living faith because it is based on eternal life and hope that can never be taken away from us no matter what happens in this world. Serious.Life: John, wrapping up this interview, what would you like to say to our readers? What thoughts or challenge would you like to leave them with? John: I would like to leave your readers with the thought of Colossians 3, verses 16 and 17, that the goal of my life is to let God’s Word richly dwell in me. The only way we can know God’s will and live a full life is to know His word. If I could only have one thing in my life and had to choose one single thing, it would be to have God’s Word. So I encourage your readers to let the Word of God fill their minds and fill their lives by making a time each

and every day to read the Bible and find out what God says. Five or 10 minutes a week or hearing a sermon on Sunday is not enough. God’s word is a 72 hour message, that’s how long it takes to sit down and read the entire Bible. If you’re doing that 10 minutes a week, you are starving yourself spiritually. The greatest lessons I’ve learned in my life was when that old blind man told me that I should be reading the Bible once a year minimum and I should read it at least one time for every year of my age. That has been the biggest blessing to me and one of the biggest factors of my growth and ministry. So I would leave your readers with this encouragement, to open their Bibles and spend a significant amount of time each day reading God’s Word. ~

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

>> SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

Land of the Book - John and Bonnie have been leading tours to Israel for many years.

Steve Pavlina:

A Changed Life Looking To Change Lives

teve Pavlina is widely recognized as one of the most successful personal development bloggers on the Internet, attracting more than two million monthly readers to his website, StevePavlina.com. He has written more than 700 articles and recorded many audio programs on a broad range of self-help topics, including productivity, relationships, and spirituality. Steve has been quoted as an expert by the New York Times, USA Today, U.S. News & World Report, the Los Angeles Daily News, Self Magazine, and The Guardian. It was our pleasure to interview Steve and find out a little about what makes him tick:

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

What was your life like growing up? What are the things that shaped your ideas and future choices? Who were the people that were influential?

I grew up in a very Christian family in Los Angeles. I attended 12 years of Catholic school and went to church every Sunday, so my life was highly structured from a young age. I learned to be organized and disciplined, but as I entered my late teens, I began to reject having my beliefs dictated by others. I felt a strong

desire to learn about other belief systems and to explore life outside the box of Catholicism, although I didn’t really get a chance to do that until I moved out at age 18. Both of my parents were career employees. My father worked for an aerospace firm, and my mother was a college math professor. This gave our family great financial stability, but I often felt that my parents’ path was way too rigid and wouldn’t be a good fit for me. I was a left-hander being raised by two right-handers. As a young adult, the idea that I had to pursue a singular career path felt very wrong to me. I also decided that it would be more rewarding to start my own business instead of getting a job. I wanted the freedom to choose my own projects instead

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

In your book, you tell the story of some bad choices that led you down the wrong path. What were some of those choices and what motivations drove you during that time?

In my late teens, I fell into a pattern of shoplifting. At first it began as something I did just for the thrill, like a college prank, but soon it developed into a habit and then an addiction. I would get arrested, do some community service, and go right back to stealing. This pattern continued for more than a year. After a while, shoplifting didn’t feel like much of a choice to me. It was more like a compulsion. I got hooked on the adrenaline rush that came from stealing. One time I was caught shoplifting two candy bars with a total retail value of $1.40, and I had $40 cash in my wallet. The security guards who caught me were justifiably outraged. My friends knew what I was doing, and many of them tried to talk some sense into me, but I would always dismiss them with joke responses. I was in total denial about what I was doing. I was so addicted to the momentary thrill of shoplifting that I couldn’t bring myself to face where it was leading me. But my friends were right of course, and eventually I was expelled from college because I kept ditching classes to go shoplifting instead. Looking back, I think my

going far beyond the scope of my high school classes. For example, when I was 16, I would program my graphics calculator to create intricate fractal images. This encouragement helped me learn the value of going through life at my own pace instead of following along with what everyone else was doing. When I was 22 years old, I met a woman named Erin who was in many ways my polar opposite. She was a very loving, intuitive person who made new friends easily. Our relationship developed quickly, first as friends and then as romantic partners. Over a period of years, we both had an amazing transformative effect on each other. I taught her to go after her dreams and to overcome her fears, and she taught me to open my heart and to connect with people. Erin and I have been married for more than 10 years now, and we run our personal development business together, working from home.

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

of having someone else assign them to me. I wasn’t inspired by other entrepreneurs at the time. I simply realized that I didn’t want to live the same kind of life my parents did; I knew it wouldn’t make me happy. Doing the opposite seemed like a good place to start. My parents were both very logical people who kept mostly to themselves, so our home was ruled by the head and not the heart. I don’t recall hearing the words “I love you” uttered in our home, and displays of physical affection were virtually nonexistent. Consequently, while I was very smart and disciplined, my social and emotional intelligence lagged far behind. I felt much more comfortable around computers than I did around human beings. In high school I threw myself into my studies, and I found that I was unusually good in math and science. Fortunately I had some encouraging teachers who recognized my aptitude and helped to push me. They could see that the normal curriculum wasn’t challenging me, so they went out of their way to give me special assignments and exams. I loved the extra attention and worked even harder,

shoplifting addiction was a result of too many repressed emotions coming to the surface. I wasn’t happy with the path I was on, but since I was in deep denial about that, shoplifting became an outlet for subconscious selfsabotage. Once my college plans were totally derailed, I had plenty of time to think about what I really wanted to do with my life. Even though this process might seem very destructive at first glance, I feel grateful today because it was a consciousness-raising experience for me.

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

Did you have a “revelation” moment that turned things around, or did it happen over time?

It was actually a little of both. In order to maintain the adrenaline rush from shoplifting, I had to keep taking bigger and bigger risks; otherwise I’d start feeling terribly empty inside. Eventually, I pushed too far and got arrested for felony grand theft. With my priors, I was looking at spending the next 1-2 years in state prison. As I sat in jail after the initial arrest, I experienced this overwhelming feeling of responsibility. I realized that no one had done this to me. I’d done it to myself. My own choices had led me down this path, and I had to accept responsibility for all of it. Even though I hadn’t made those choices consciously, they were still my choices to make. I surrendered to the certainty that I’d be spending the next year or two in a jail cell, but I realized that after I was released, I’d be able to start fresh. I knew I couldn’t solve all my problems overnight, but

I saw that I could potentially grow into a better person. I could change the course of my life by learning to make better decisions. That was the moment I first glimpsed the awesome power of conscious growth. It didn’t matter what my present circumstances were. By making new choices, I had the power to consciously direct my life’s path from that moment on. What happened next still blows me away to this day. When I went to court a few months later, the court mistakenly processed my case as a first offense. The felony charge of grand theft was reduced to a misdemeanor, and I was sentenced to 60 hours of community service instead of having to go to prison. I could scarcely believe it. I did that community service like it was a dream job! It took years to fully process the revelation I had in that jail cell. I was only 19 at the time, but I felt like I’d been given a tremendous gift. From that moment on, I committed myself to a path of conscious growth. I decided I would become the best human being I could be. At the time I had no idea what that meant, but I’ve made considerable progress since then. Running a personal development website is certainly a much better way to serve others than sitting in jail. Was the change instantaneous and lasting? Or were there a lot of “two steps forward and one step back” in the transition? From a mental and emotional perspective, the shift was indeed instantaneous and lasting.

After that experience in jail, I was no longer the same person. I stopped shoplifting, and I began to spend a lot of time reading books and listening to inspirational audio programs instead. Over a period of years, I gradually built a more positive life for myself. I began making real, independent decisions instead of allowing so much of my life to be guided by compulsive or socially conditioned patterns. I went back to college, starting over as a freshman, and I graduated with two degrees in only three semesters by taking triple the normal course load. I’d never done anything like that before, but the experience taught me that I had the ability to consciously direct the course of my life and that I didn’t have to remain a victim of my past. After graduating from college, I launched a computer game development business and ran it for 10 years. Then in 2004, I retired from game development and launched StevePavlina.com, a website devoted to helping people on the path of conscious growth. These changes definitely weren’t fast and easy. I had to work very hard on myself, but I made steady progress, and I don’t feel that backsliding was a real problem. I think this is due in large part to the way I evaluate my progress. Instead of looking at external factors like how much money I’m making or what level of career success I’ve achieved, I simply go to a mirror and look myself in the eye. I keep staring until I see my 19-year old self staring back at me – the scared teenager who committed himself to a lifelong path of conscious growth while sitting

in jail. I ask myself if I’ve been honoring the promise he made. Have I continued pushing myself to grow? Am I a better human being this year than I was last year? Am I making real choices, or is my life being driven by unconscious habits? The man in the mirror is the ultimate judge. When I look in his eyes, I immediately know whether I’m on the right path or not. And if I’ve gotten sidetracked, then it becomes clear that I need to make some changes.

Today I strive to center my life around the core principles

It took me about 2-1/2 years to develop this model, which is deceptively simple to apply. By checking in with these three principles, I can quickly diagnose any problem situation and begin heading in the direction of a practical solution. For example, recently I decided to stop selling advertising on my website, even though that decision meant giving up about $100,000 in passive annual income. I came to this decision by filtering it through the principles of truth, love, and power. When I checked in with the principle of truth, I had to acknowledge that I didn’t feel good about some of the ads that were being displayed on

of truth, love, and power, a philosophy I developed while working on my book. I grew tired of approaching personal growth from a fragmented perspective. I wanted a more holistic model. Instead of following different rules for improving my health, relationships, career, and so on, I sought to define a core set of guiding principles that I could trust to point me in the direction of positive growth regardless of circumstances. I thought this would help me achieve greater consistency, such that my career, relationships, habits, lifestyle, and spiritual pursuits would all support each other congruently instead of creating conflict.

my website. For example, I’d post an article about health habits, and a third-party ad network I used would show ads for fast food restaurants. The truth was that the ads were a bad fit for my message, even though they were making me a lot of money. When I consulted the principle of love, I saw that if I kept generating income from advertising in the way I’d been doing, I’d be putting profits ahead of people. The ads weren’t really serving my readers, and many people found them annoying. I also realized that even though I’d make less money, I’d feel much better about my own website if it didn’t have any third-party ads on it. I could

What is your foundation today? Where/who/what do you draw your core principles from?

see that taking the ads down was the more loving choice. And finally, when I considered the principle of power, I realized that the ads had become a disempowering crutch. I was using my website to sell other people’s products, but the more empowering choice would be to develop and offer my own products. That would provide a better service for my visitors, thereby empowering them. And I’d probably be able to generate more income from my own products than from third-party ads, so it would be a more empowering choice for me as well. Once I applied these principles to the decision of whether or not to continue selling advertising on my website, the answer became clear. Since I’ve learned to trust in these principles, I was able to commit to that decision, and I removed all thirdparty ads from my website in October 2008. Today the only products being promoted on my website are those I personally recommend. This wasn’t an easy decision, but I feel strongly that it’s the right choice, both for myself and for my readers.

Instead of looking at external factors like how much money I’m making, I simply go to a mirror and look myself in the eye.

>> SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

Regardless of your current circumstances, you can use the principles of truth, love, and power to turn your life in the direction of positive

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

Many of our readers are no doubt at a decision point in their life. What things would you have them consider or think about as they consider which direction they want their life to take?

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

SERIOUS.LIFE.MAGAZINE

NOVEMBER 2008

W W W. S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M T M

ADVERTISING@SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

life, or are most of your decisions being made by others? Did you choose your current line of work, your financial situation, your relationships, and your current health habits? If you aren’t experiencing a life of your choosing, then it’s time to get in touch with your real desires and make some new choices. Changing directions won’t be easy, and you’ll likely be criticized for it, but it’s definitely worthwhile. Your happiness is a direct result of your alignment with truth, love, and power. The better your alignment with these principles, the faster your circumstances will improve, and the more value you’ll share with others along the way. What would you say is the greatest lesson that other people can learn by reading your story?

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

What is the future of Steve Pavlina? Where are you headed? What can we anticipate and be looking forward to?

The most intelligent thing you can do with your life is to grow. By committing yourself to a path of conscious growth, you’ll create an amazing life for yourself – a life of your own choosing instead of one controlled by forces beyond your control. Then by sharing your experiences and lessons along the way, you can provide tremendous value for others. So the more you grow, the more you contribute. By passionately pursuing your own path of growth, you actively make the world a better place for all of us. This is a wonderful way to live.

My website experienced some dramatic traffic growth in its first few years online, but now that it has matured into a stable online resource, I want to build upon its success to expand into other media. Writing my book was the first step in this direction, and after seeing it receive such glowing reviews, I’m highly motivated to explore other media such as downloadable products, personal coaching, online video, and live workshops. I’m constantly looking for ways to deliver more value to people. My wife and I have reached the point where we can’t maintain the business and develop new outlets at the same time, so we have to start hiring help. On the domestic side, we recently hired a housekeeper to save us time at home. And now we’re starting to recruit others to help us grow the business as well. I’m much more inspired by service goals than financial ones, so I really like the idea of starting a non-profit organization as a way of institutionalizing my work. Specifically, I’d love to build a global organization with thousands of local clubs around the world, so they’ll be easily accessible to billions of people. At these club meetings, people would come together to help each other improve their lives in a very holistic way, touching upon health, relationships, career, finances, spiritual growth, habits, and more. I think our world could definitely use an organization like this, so we can help each other learn and grow. We all need that kind of positive support in our lives. ~

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

growth. There’s always a way for you to make your life even better than it is now. First, what is the truth of your situation? What do your perceptions tell you? What do you intuitively feel? It’s important to acknowledge the truth as you see it, even if you feel powerless to act on that truth in the moment. It’s better to admit the truth and feel powerless to change than to allow falsehood and denial to creep into your life. Secondly, are you connecting with what you want, or are you stuck with what you don’t want? Are you connecting with people who love and support you, or have you fallen into the trap of having too many disempowering relationships with critical people? Many people hold the mistaken belief that we must settle for whatever relationships come to us, but we always have the freedom to release relationships that don’t serve us and to consciously go out and create new connections with people we like and respect. If your life is filled with unsupportive relationships, that’s a problem you can correct by conscious choice. You’ll be much happier and more fulfilled if you learn to let go of people, activities, and situations that reinforce negative thinking. Spend time connecting with positive, encouraging people, and they’ll help elevate you to a whole new level of being. Be loyal to your best self, not to your pity posse. Thirdly, are you aligned with power? Are you disciplining yourself to take action, or are you sitting on the sidelines watching life pass you by? Are you consciously creating your

serious.health serious.extras

Adoption

It Changed My Life

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

By Erin Henderson It sounds very cliché to say that an experience was “life changing”, but the day that I walked into AHOPE, an orphanage in Ethiopia for HIV+ children, I truly left a changed person. My husband, Josh, and I were in Ethiopia adopting our ninth child in February of 2006. I was 29 years old and Josh was 31. We had kids at home ranging in age from two years to 10 years, and including our new son, Benjamin, six of the nine kids had joined our family through the miracle of adoption. Someone who knew that we were traveling to Ethiopia to get Ben asked if we would be willing to gather and deliver some donations to an orphanage for HIV+ children.

I was more than happy to help gather the donations, and the youth in our church jumped in and did a fabulous job loading us up with gifts for the kids. But I told Josh that there was just no way I could go to the orphanage, and that he would have to take the donations there himself. I had a hard enough time emotionally visiting Ben’s orphanage, where the kids were all healthy and were all matched with families or would soon be. I was just sure I couldn’t handle going to an orphanage where the kids all had a life threatening illness and had no hope of being adopted. I pictured kids who were sickly, lonely, sad and hopeless. I cried just thinking about it. But my Heavenly Father knew better than I (of course),

and when the time came to bring the donations to AHOPE, I just knew that I was supposed to go with Josh and see the children. And so I did. I think back to that day as I was getting out of the cab at AHOPE. I had no idea how much my life was about to change, in more ways than one. First, we met some of the incredible staff. We could tell that they were motivated by love and concern for the children, and what they were accomplishing was amazing. We had also been asked to interview the director of AHOPE while we were there for a fundraising video, and as I asked more and more questions, I found myself completely soaking up her answers. I got a crash course education in the HIV crisis in Ethiopia, care for HIV+ children, and the needs of HIV+ orphans. I could feel the wheels in my brain whirling, and the flutters of a new passion starting in my heart. And then we met the children. I was sitting on the cold orphanage floor, playing with several little boys and showing Ben how to use the camera and get pictures of the kids, when I saw her. My heart literally stopped Land of the Book - Mom to Mercy (13, USA), Nathan (11, bio), Ryan (10, bio), Des for a second, and then it started to race. My eyes filled with (10, USA), Shane (8, bio), Benjamin (7, Ethiopia), Amanda (7, Korea), Maggie (6, tears, and all I could do for a Vietnam), Belane (4, from AHOPE in Ethiopia), Marcus (4, USA) and finally, Solomon moment was look at her. She Tsega, 2 years old, home from AHOPE in Ethiopia on March 8, 2008

Get a FREE subscription: www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe

Belane

>> SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

these children for adoption. Was it possible we could adopt this girl? On one hand, I knew we were stretched financially. I knew it would be difficult to cover the costs for another adoption. I knew everyone would think we were nuts. I knew we understood very little about caring for an HIV+ child. But at the same time, I knew what my heart felt -- I wanted to be that little girl’s mom. I got into the cab when it was time to leave, and the tears started to flow. I looked out the window and all of the little children were gathered on the front step, waving good-bye. I tried not to look at her, but I did, and seeing her little hand waving back and forth and that beautiful smile made my heart ache in a terrible way. That day I did not know much about HIV. I had no idea what that little girl’s prognosis

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

was a small girl, I guessed to be about two years old. Her freshly shaven head gave her away as a fairly new addition to the orphanage. She had a tattered and stained long-sleeved yellow shirt on with a denim jumper over it and little white sandals on her feet. I turned to Josh who was swarmed with children and said, “Josh…look at her.” I was so choked up that I couldn’t say anything else. Josh turned, looked and smiled, but was then quickly overtaken by the boys again. I bent down and motioned for her to come to me and she did without any hesitation. I sat down right there and she snuggled into my lap. I could not explain why I was so drawn to her. She was not the youngest child in the room. She was not the cutest (although

she was beautiful), she did not stand out physically in any way, and anyone who knows me well, knows that I am a huge sucker for little boys. There were tons of darling, sweet and friendly little children in that room that afternoon, but I only had eyes for one. I rocked her in my arms, held her fat little toddler hands, rubbed her sweet hair that was just starting to grow back, and felt my heart swell to the point that I didn’t know if I could take it. She melted into my body like my own babies do…in that way that says, “I am yours and you are mine and this is where I belong.” As I sat there and held her, I started thinking about the basics I had just learned about HIV. The kids did well on treatment. The virus was not transmitted in household settings. And, they had just started trying to place

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

serious.health serious.extras

was. I had no idea if it was even possible to adopt her. But I knew she was mine, so I had to find a way to get her home. I spent several months educating myself (and Josh) about HIV. We talked to a Pediatric Infectious Disease specialist and found out that HIV could not be transmitted in any type of casual contact and that an HIV+ child would not be a risk to the rest of the family. We found out that her long- term prognosis would be excellent, that she would live in great overall health, and that parenting her would not be much different than parenting any other child. We found out that although there would be a lot of extra red tape, it would be possible to adopt her. We prayed a lot, maybe more than I had ever prayed about anything. My answer was always the same. “She is mine.” We plowed ahead, determined to get her home. It didn’t matter that we already had nine kids or that she was HIV+. Many people questioned what we were doing, and there were times that without the power of knowing that what we were doing was right, I don’t know if we would have had the strength and the courage to move forward. Belane finally came home in November of 2006. During the time that we waited for all of the paperwork to be completed so we could travel back to Ethiopia to get her, I made myself an “expert” on parenting HIV+ children and on adopting HIV+ kids. Although at that time adopting HIV+ children

was almost completely unheard of (she was the fifth HIV+ child from Ethiopia to ever be adopted), I blogged about our story openly and honestly, in hopes of educating and possibly even inspiring others. During those months, some other families became interested in adopting HIV+ kids. I received emails from people considering HIV adoption, wanting to know more. I became sort of the go-to person for information about HIV+ international adoption. When I traveled to Ethiopia to get Belane, my passion to advocate for those children was multiplied many times over. It was amazingly joyful to have Belane in my arms again but so heartbreaking to see so many beautiful, joyful children who were so full of life and so full of love and yet had very little hope of ever being adopted and ever having a mom of their own again. I took a lot of pictures of the kids waiting, and went home with a renewed commitment to dedicate myself to advocating for HIV+ orphans. In the Bible, in the book of Matthew, chapter 25, verse 40, it says, “And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.” In my eyes, HIV+ orphans truly are the “least of these”. In January of 2008, I was hired by Adoption Advocates International, the agency we used to adopt Belane and the first adoption agency working

in Ethiopia to actively try to find homes for HIV+ children, to be their HIV+ Adoption Coordinator. I advocate for HIV+ orphans, monitor their health care, speak with prospective adoptive families, provide them with information before, during and after the adoption process. Best of all, I get to see these children, who are truly some of the most vulnerable on earth, join loving families and thrive. AAI now has over 60 HIV+ children from Ethiopia either home with new families or in the process of being adopted. While there was almost no information available regarding HIV+ adoption when we were starting the process to adopt Belane, now there are wonderful websites, email groups and organizations created by dedicated people (mostly adoptive parents) who share my passion of advocating for HIV+ orphans. Other adoption agencies have started to place HIV+ children for adoption. The red tape involved in placing HIV+ kids has been dramatically streamlined and expedited. Things have changed so drastically in the last two years that it truly is miraculous. Along with fueling my passion to advocate for HIV+ orphans, something else very significant and life-changing happened while I was in Ethiopia getting Belane. We saw a little boy who had just been brought into the orphanage. He was a year old but could not even sit up. He was emaciated and so sick that his eyes were glazed over. They

www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe

were open, but if he saw us, there was no sign of it. I asked if he was going to be available for adoption, and they told me that they didn’t think he would live through the weekend. I went home and could not forget him. Again the Holy Ghost spoke straight to my heart. “He is yours.” In February of 2008, I traveled back to Ethiopia to get my beloved Solomon Tsega, who is now a robust three year old. The little boy who had once so given up on life that he was barely there is now so full of life that he touches everyone who meets him. He has some lasting effects from being so close to death, but his recovery has been nothing short of a miracle, and the doctors have high hopes for his long-term health. Belane is now almost five years old, is the picture of health, and is quite the sassy princess. With 11 kids, my incredible husband and a job that I care so deeply about, life is wonderfully full. While medically speaking, HIV is very easy to “live with” (much easier to manage than diabetes, hepatitis and many other conditions), socially, there is still a nasty stigma and a great amount of ignorance surrounding the disease. Most people living with HIV agree that dealing with the social and emotional aspects of the disease are much more challenging than dealing with the medical aspects. Here is what I wish everyone knew about HIV:

- HIV CANNOT be spread through casual/household contact. HIV is not spread through hugging, kissing, shaking hands, sharing toys, sneezing, coughing, sharing food, sharing drinks, bathing, swimming or any other casual way. It has been proven that HIV and AIDS can only be spread through sexual contact, birth, breastfeeding and blood to blood contact (such as sharing needles). HIV+ children (and HIV+ adults who practice safe sex and do not use drugs) are not a risk to those around them. - HIV is now considered a chronic but manageable

disease. With treatment, people who are HIV+ can live indefinitely without developing AIDS and can live long and full lives. - People who are HIV+ deserve to be treated with love, respect, support and acceptance as all people do. If anyone wants more info on transmission, these websites are great resources: www.cdc. gov/hiv/resources/factsheets/ transmission.htm and here: www.thewellproject.org/en_ US/HIV_The_Basics/ Visit Erin’s blog at: fullhousehandshearts.typepad. com. ~

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference. Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

serious.health serious.extras

Adoption

God’s Painted Picture

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

By Carol Bauman In March of 2005, our lives were changed, our hearts were filled, and a love for two little boys grew more than we could have imagined. My husband and I were introduced to our sons, Parker Tereso and Mason Fernando. Our adoption journey was quick and smooth. Just six months after starting the process, we were able to

bring our little boys home and start the family every adoptive parent dreams of. Parker was 2 ½ years old and had the face of an angel. Mason was five months old and fulfilled my dream of having a baby. While Parker was lacking nutrition, Mason was terribly ill. He was suffering from a very rare male genetic disorder called Wiskott-Aldrich

syndrome. His immune system was greatly compromised, as washis platelet production. Mason’s only hope was a bone marrow transplant. Faced with a long and painful road ahead, we became very strong through Mason. He pulled through every illness, overcame every set back, and survived a stroke and a transplant. After spending

Get a FREE subscription: www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe

The Baumans

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

inquisitive questions and has an imagination that would thrill anyone. Because he was sick for so long, he was held most of his tender life. Getting him to sleep in his own bed and sleep through the night is still quite a

AFTER THE TWINS, WE FINALLY FELT LIKE WE WERE A COMPLETE FAMILY

and have parents that loved her as their own. We had three siblings and a family that was more than we ever dreamed of. The story doesn’t stop there. Just when we thought our family was big enough

challenge. However, it’s the midnight chats that keep that challenge at bay. This midnight chat began like every other one. It was past midnight, I was more than half asleep and Mason was more than wide-awake. “Mommy, why is the light so bright in the potty room when it’s dark, why do cows ‘moo’ but people don’t, how come the sun goes away and then comes back when it’s wake up time,” and so on. Suddenly a question brought me out of my slumber, and my eyes opened to meet his big, dark, and innocent eyes. “Mommy, why am I this color and you are that color?” He gently touched my arm and his face filled with sincere curiosity. I never imagined this particular discussion would occur this way. I suppose I

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

18 months in the hospital and receiving more than 200 blood transfusions, one would never know he was ever so sick. Today, Mason is a courageous and energetic four year old. Just after bringing Mason home from his transplant, we also brought home the boys’ biological older sister, Lauren Esperanza. Lauren was a 9-year-old girl who was eager to be united with her brothers

and complete in every way, I became pregnant with twins. After suffering several miscarriages and fertility problems, yet another dream came true, and the kids were just as excited as we were. On June 5, 2008, Henry and Susie Grace entered the world with siblings that embraced them as their own. It was then that we finally felt totally complete. As Mason gets older, he becomes more and more curious. He asks the most

(continued next page)

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

SERIOUS.LIFE.MAGAZINE

NOVEMBER 2008

W W W. S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M T M

ADVERTISING@SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

Mason - God paints the grass and sky, the toys, the doggies, and even food.

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

never knew or guessed how or when it would come up. After all, Mason, Parker, and Lauren didn’t “seem” adopted to me. They never did. They were mine from day one. They have my heart and it is as simple as that. But Mason knew there was something different. Before I could answer, he said, “I know! It’s because God painted you that color and he painted me this color, right?” Completely speechless and holding back tears, I smiled. He was very sure of his answer and went on to tell me that God paints everything. According to Mason, God paints some things green like the grass and some things blue like the sky, some doggies brown and some white, some food good and some food yucky, some toys red and some toys yellow. He even compared me to another little boy’s mommy at his school. He said his friend’smommy was painted a different color than her little boy, but she was still his mommy. This little boy was adopted from Guatemala too. It all made perfect sense to him. That night I learned something invaluable. I pictured something amazing. I saw something so wonderful and beautiful through the eyes of a four year old. I saw God painting. My son taught me that we are all painted differently. We are all special no matter how we are painted. It doesn’t matter where we came from or how we got here. God painted us and all that is around us. His picture is perfect. Our family is perfect. It is perfect because that’s the way God painted it. ~

serious.health serious.extras

Magazine Monday

Each month we choose a blog post that is submitted and publish it, unedited, just like it appears on your blog.If you would like to have something from your blog considered, submit it here.

Blog: Atlas Shrugs Global Network Initiative - a loss of religious freedom? By Randall Rathbun If 57 nations of the Organization of the Islamic Conference have their way in the United Nations, and the “Defamation of Religions resolution” is approved, it may be a crime, soon, to publish Atlas Shrugs - Pam Geller of

Atlas Shrugs (left) at a recent

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

Florida political event.

material on the internet deemed to advocate “religious hatred”. This document states that it is wrong to associate Islam with human rights violations and terrorism, and that it is deplorable to use the internet to incite xenophobia, or related intolerance and discrimination towards Islam (and any other religion) and that defamation of Islam and Muslims must be effectively combatted. One is forced to ask what motive is guiding terrorists, if not a religious one, which they have said in their very own words? So how does this affect the internet? Simple, on October 28, 2008 the Global Network Initiative was publically announced, in their own words

“a consortium of companies, civil society organizations, investors and academics” with a “comprehensive collaborative approach to regulate the Information & Communications Infrastructures worldwide for the express purpose of protecting and advancing freedom of expression.” This organization has quietly met for 2 years hammering out an agreement binding upon their members. These members include Microsoft, Yahoo and Google and other major IT players on the world stage. While proclaming that protection of privacy is their foremost concern and that the GNI advances fundamental human rights, one must read the fine print buried in their “Principles”. What is not apparent is that if the GNI intends to abide by the United Nations “International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights [ICCPR] and article 20 item 2 of the ICCPR which states “Any advocacy of national, racial or religious hatred that constitutes incitement to discrimination, hostility or violence shall be prohibited by law.” then it will be illegal to post such material on the internet, period! It appears that a chilling silencing of religious expression on the internet

Want us to publish a post from your blog? www.seriouslifemagazine.com/yourblog is about to occur, if the Defamation of religion resolution is approved and the GNI promises to abide by its founding principles subservient to the ICCPR articles. We need to remember that Yahoo was accused of assisting the Chinese government in supplying the identity of “political dissidents”. One does not need to imagine what might be next on the horizon. Caveat Lector! atlasshrugs2000.typepad.com

Blog: At Shore’s End Writer...Interrupted By EarthMommy One popular mantra among writers is the idea that “you can’t fix a blank page”, meaning

that lousy writing is better than no writing at all. Often times though, when I have the opportunity to write, I am unable to conquer the blank page. I often find myself seated, pen in hand or keyboard under my fingertips, feeling as blank as the page before me. When I sleep soundly I dream vividly, and upon awakening I have much to write about. But life demands my immediate attention, and my dream-inspired places, scenes and characters fade quickly into oblivion. Many a story with enormous potential has been miscarried in this manner. Even the inspirations that come from my own life experiences are no match for my mountainous writer’s block. Many a tale from my real life

has failed to make it to any form of print, so what hope does fiction even have? It if weren’t for blogging I would never write at all. I have my addiction to public journaling to thank for the fact that my writer’s brain gets any exercise at all. When I do write, is is my habit to write out of sequence. I tend to write what I feel, rather than planning out a scene from start to finish and writing it that way. In fact, most of my pieces have never progressed past a file folder or CD full of random, unconnected scenes. I’m not good at the bridge work that it requires to pull them all together into a completed work. (continued next page)

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference. Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

serious.health serious.extras

There have been many times in my life when my writing has been much-needed therapy. Be it journaling, poetry or fiction, much of my work today has filled some need in me that was not otherwise to be met. When I was a young teen struggling with isolation and lonliness, the characters I created were much needed friends. Later, as a young bride and new mother, trapped in a negative home situation, my writing provided me a safe place to go and an outlet for emotions that no one else seemed to understand. These days there are internet groups for almost everyone in every situation, full of people going through similar things in life. For most of my life though, I was isolated and often lonely. As a young mom whose toddler just would not sleep, I spent hours feeling like I was the only one in the world awake at 2 am rocking a crying, restless child. With tears running down my face, I prayed that she would just fall asleep. My own sleep deprivation only compounded my sense of failure and inadequacy. Had it not been for a red spiral notebook and green felt tip pen, I might not have made it though that time. I’m older now, and wiser. I have experience to guide me, other moms to share with and a wealth of information at my fingertips when it comes to parenting, marriage and other topics of concern to me in my daily life. I guess it could be observed that I don’t need my writing as much as I used to. Be that as it may, the desire

to write is still there and still strong. The urge to put ink to paper in some format the other is always with me. Romances, adventures, women’s fiction themes and more roll around in my head while I go about the daily tasks before me. No matter how carefully I plan, how many notes I scribble down or how many characters I nurture to life, I Can’t quite seem to bridge the gap to making them a literary reality. Somehow I am always..... interrupted. ~ www.atshoresend.com

Blog: Forever-n-Always I Chose You By Jill Yesterday turned into many blessings through pain. Abigail came to me before lunch complaining her right side her next to her belly button. She had complained once before about this a month ago. This time I could tell she was truly in pain. Abigail is not one of our children who brings you every boo boo. She ate a small lunch and laid down for nap. I hoped that when she woke up maybe her tummy would feel better. Five of our children woke with colds and she was one of them...so I thought maybe this was just part of her cold. When she woke up the pain was still there. I spoke with our pediatrician who instructed me to give it one more hour and if not better to go to hospital to eliminate the chance it might be her appendix. An hour passed and she was still in pain. Scott came home and I left with her and Lexi

for the ER. That was 6:15pm. I prayed as I drove with a dear friend and continued praying all night long. The kids and Scott were praying for her at home too - they asked Daddy to pray several times each before going to bed. How precious! We arrived, got checked in and within 10 minutes were taken back to begin what would turn out to be a very long night for all of us - filled with many blessings along the way! Abigail was a trooper and very brave. She cried quietly when they placed the IV in and took her blood vs the last experience I had with her when she came home where it took 3 very large nurses to hold her down to take two small vials. It might have helped just a wee little bit that Mommy was a dancing fool for her this time and I was NOT the person holding her down. She got to giggle and cry at the same time. Next up urine samples and what an experience that was for both of us. I’ll leave out the details on that one, but trust me it was messy! After being there for two hours, we were told she would need a CT Scan of her lower abdomen to rule out appendicitis, even with her blood work coming back normal and initial urinalysis. They were not comfortable with her pain, where it was located and how long it was lasting. They said it was definitely not a virus or stomach flu. A CT Scan meant four more hours at least of being there. Abigail had to drink 10 oz of this icky stuff mixed into grape

www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

right back. I walked to the exit knowing I couldn’t miss them leaving. The woman with them was alone, so I introduced myself to her and said, “I’m sorry about your friend, I will continue to pray for her.” She looked at me with a look I won’t soon forget and said, “Thank-you! That is my daughter-in-law and my son. She needs all the prayers you can remember to offer up to our Father.” Immediately regret took over my heart. Oh, Lord I’m so sorry for not listening. Yet, He was not done with me of them, this situation and giving me a chance to be fully obedient. The motherin-law and I continued to talk as her son filled out all the discharge papers. In only a few minutes together I was able to learn all about their situation, the cry of this womans heart for her son and his wife and how desperate she was to see her daughter-in-law come to know God intimately. Her son is a born-again believer - thank YOU LORD for that! The son walked past me and I think his shame in the situation drove his eyes right to the ground vs. looking at me while I continued to speak to his mom. He went and got his wife, they walked past me and the entire time I just prayed for the Lord to grab her life so boldly that her heart would be driven to the ground before Him and she too would become a child walking with her Father. The mother-inlaw said good-bye to me and I assured her I would continue praying for them.

that. I began praying fervently for them and all the nurses and doctors working with her. I could see the pain in the young husbands eyes and the motherin-law stroking her sons hand to reassure him she was there for him. I watched but didn’t know who they were too each other yet. I just assumed who they all were to each other by how they treated one another. Interesting right? They will know you love Me, by how you love one another. Nope praying for them was only half of what He wanted me to do. He continued to tell me, “go and mee them.” Lord, it is midnight, I’m tired and I can’t be trusted to know if You are really asking me to go and introduce myself to them, I thought to myself. Yet, that was what I continued to feel was being said to me in my spirit. So, now was the time to show Him I am walking by faith when I am seriously not comfortable in a situation I have found myself. I was like Abraham, go and leave your entire family. He took his nephew Lot with him. I didn’t do everything God asked either, just the parts that felt comfortable to me or what I thought He really meant. I was sure now that I was going to miss all blessings He had for me through this experience. I was not faithful with what He has given me, nor was I being obedient to His soft voice. I grieved the Spirit and knew I needed to do as I was told. By this point they were being discharged. I only had one chance left to meet them and now was the time to go do it. I told Lexi that I would be

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

juice once an hour - two times. Then wait an hour for the scan to be done. Did I mention she was a trooper!? It was midnight by the time they did her scan. She was asleep on and off before it. Only woke long enough for them to do the scan and then agreeably went right back to sleep. Yes Mom, with a smile. Ok, I don’t know about you, but at this point I don’t think I would have been so chipper! Meanwhile, let me explain what was going on around us in the ER - several young boys came in with mono, stomach flus and then came in the lost, hurting and lonely - five patients with major psych issues - a 20 something man drunk to almost death, a late 20’s woman who cuts herself (accompanied by her husband and mother-in-law), an elderly woman who is lost and very ill. There were more but these were the ones that God had brought tonight for me and wanted to see if I was listening to His voice? In between all the lab work for Abigail I kept an eye on the young couple with the motherin-law. I was not being noisy - I was being pulled in my spirit to go over and talk to them. God was telling me, “Pray for them. Go over and talk to them. Tell them I am here with them. Pray for them.” Ok, was He kidding, go over and talk to a couple that is in the ER for cutting herself and telling a guard I know strange right, but it feels so good??? Me Lord? You want me to go over there? Is this my flesh? I think I heard you say pray for them. Ok so I will do

(continued next page)

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

serious.health serious.extras

I walked back into the ER and made sure the girls were both OK. They were sound asleep. This time instead of being idle next to them, I walked around to see who else needed lifting before our Father. Oh my heart felt the pain of the darkness in this place. I asked God to protect me and the girls while we were there from danger, foul language and anything that might bring hurt to their precious hearts. A family quarrel brought police and security running past our room earlier and that was enough excitment for both of them. I also took time to read With Christ in the School of Prayer. Chapter 23 - was on the verse above John 15:16. I had many hours to meditate on what was being explained in this chapter and the lesson: obedience the path to power in prayer. Nothing happens by chance with God. NOTHING! I almost missed the blessing of learning this lesson hours before that couple entered the ER. If you have been following along with me on Monday Morning Reflections and Fearfully Fabulous Fridays you know that God is working in my life in these very important areas: obedience, trust and faith. Now instead of just learning about it, He was giving me an opportunity to live it out. I almost blew it! I lost sight of all for your glory and honor Father. I let go of trusting that small voice speaking to me. I questioned instead of like Abraham, Moses and OT saints that just did what the

Father asked of them. I don’t want to harden my heart in any way to Him or quench the Spirit - because my true and one desire is to know Him through the eyes of Jesus. Not as I see or think, but through the obedience and love Jesus displayed so perfectly to God the Father all the days of His life and even today. Everything He does is done ONLY to bring glory to the Father, in and through us! Andrew Murray writes, “The application of this in the school of prayer is very simple but very solemn. “I chose you, “ the Master says, “and appointed you that ye should go and bear fruit, “ much fruit (verses 5,8), “and that your fruit should abide, “that your life might be one of abiding fruit and abiding fruitfulness, “that” as fruitful branches abiding in me, “whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, He may give it you.” How often we’ve tried to pray an effective prayer for grace to bear fruit and have wondered why the answer

didn’t come. It was because we were reversing the Master’s order. We wanted to have the comfort, the joy, and the strength first, so we could do the work easily and without any feeling of difficulty or self-sacrifice. But He wanted us to do what He said in the obedience of faith, without worrying about whether we felt weak or strong, or whether the work was hard or easy. The path of fruit-bearing leads us to the place and the power of successful prayer. Obedience is the only path that leads to the glory of God. Obedience doesn’t replace faith or supply its shortcomings. But faith’s obedience gives access to all the blessings our God has for us. In the Gospel of John, the baptism of the Spirit (John 14:16), the manifestation of the Son (14:21), the indwelling of the Father (14:23), the abiding in Christ’s love (15:10), the privilege of His holy friendship (15:14), and the power of effective prayer (15:16), all wait for the obedient. Now we know the great

www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

can best treat them. The doctor is baffled since we eat a very healthy diet and she gets plenty of fiber. This could all be from her early childhood diet and lack of nutrition. Something that I am still digesting from my experience last night and the lesson Andrew Murray taught me last night is what I would like to leave with to think and meditate on as well: “Let us yield ourselves to take up the appointment the Savior gives us. If we concentrate on our relationship to Him as our Master, we should no longer begin each new day with thoughts of comfort, joy, or blessing. Our first thought should be: “I belong to the Master.” Every moment I must act as His property, as a part of Himself, as one who only seeks to know and do His will. I am a servant, a slave of Jesus Christ. Let this be the spirit that animates me. If He says, “No longer do I call you servants, but I have called you friends,” let us accept the place of friends, because, “Ye are my friends if ye do the things which I command you.” I made sure after submitting to His full will for my time in the ER to bring honor and glory to His name through Abigail’s story! That opened the door to share about all of our children coming home to us by the grace of God! I still cringe at most people’s responses when they hear we are in the middle of our 6th adoption of our 8th child, “You are a saint.” I politely say, “I’m nothing and continue to receive all of His blessings to enable us to do His will.” That

broken wife. She was only home less than a half hour and over-dosed on one of her prescription pills for anxiety/ depression. Meanwhile, the young 20 something I mentioned earlier was in dire need of help. Five nurses were trying to get him to wake up, open his eyes, say something and try to get up. I stood just far enough away from all of it to not cause anyone to ask me to move away or if I needed something. I stood and prayed over him. I don’t know how it ended with either of these patients, but I’m trusting God to move mountains in their lives. Why? Because He asked me to pray for them and I believe it is there time to come to Him. I pray they have a chance to know Him now and serve Him boldly with the new chance I believe they were given last night in the ER. Please join me in praying for them and their families. By now it was 3:30am I was eager to get out of there and go home. I knew at this point it was not Abigail’s appendix and surgery was not needed. I praised Him for all that He had done on her behalf. We still needed to wait for the doctor to release her and give me an update on what they believed was going on. They wanted to run one more test and the results will not be back until Monday. Please join me in praying that everything comes back normal on this test as well. Abigail has something wrong with her GI tract and I am taking her to see a specialist in two weeks to begin understand what the issues are and how we

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

reason why we have not had power in faith to pray successfully. Our lives weren’t as they should have been. Simple obedience-abiding fruitfulness-was not its chief mark. We miss the mark! If our goal is not to bring glory to the Father in all we do with sincerity of heart, then we will continue to miss the mark! I saw how easy it is even with my hearts desire to honor Him in all I do. 1am - Test was done on Abigail and we were waiting for results now. I was walking back and forth in this short hallway that connected from one small nurses station to the main one in the ER. Time seemed to be moving slolwy now as I was getting very tired and just wanted to know what was wrong with Abigail. On and off I tried to sleep next to the girls in a chair but it really was impossible being that the chair was very small and hard. So I continued to walk around or just stand outside of her curtained room. 2:45am - I overheard the nurses saying they needed to prepare for a patient who needed their help to bring in his wife. About 15 minutes later, in walked the very same husband I had been praying over hours before. Oh no, my heart sank when I saw him. This time instead of looking down he made full eye contact and I was able to do God’s will. I said, “I’m praying for you. Is there anything I can do for you tonight?” He thanked me and said, “please keep praying.” I did just that! My heart broke for this young man and his

serious.health serious.extras usually brings this stare and silence. Praising God that His truths never return void! I am thankful to be chosen by You Jesus. I deserve nothing and You have blessed me beyond measure. I am grateful to be called Your friend. May I never take that for granted, be loyal and faithful to You, as You are always to me! Teach me Lord to walk worthy of this calling as a friend of Yours, a child of the Most High God and slave bought with Your blood no price could ever pay! Let us in faith and obedience give our whole life to that which Jesus chose us for and appointed us to - fruit bearing. Let us live to bless others, to testify of the life and the love there is in Jesus! forevernevernalways1. blogspot.com

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

Blog: Red Letters

Ethiopian Reflections: Blind Beggar By Jamie The single most amazing part of our recent trip to Ethiopia was the people. In this series of posts I attempt to profile them and the impact they had on me. Worship at St. George’s Cathedral couldn’t have been any more different than where I usually worship on a Sunday. Other than Jesus, it seemed everything was different at this Ethiopian Orthodox Church in Addis Ababa. First, there was the leper who was begging outside the gate. I flashed in my mind to the story in Acts 3 of Peter and John healing the beggar outside

the temple gates. Unlike the apostles, I didn’t tell him to stand up and walk. Instead, I began to think of how ancient this place was. We walked into the courtyard and began to worship. Now, realize the whole service was liturgy in Amharic, so we couldn’t understand a word they were saying. But it was beautiful, I thought on how long these people must have been worshiping like this, back to when the Gospel first came to the Ethiopian people in Acts 8. As we stood, we all noticed a blind woman who was making her way around the courtyard. She would take a shuffle forward, poke around with her stick, then reach down with her hands to make sure she wasn’t about to fall down a step. It was painful to watch — I can’t imagine how her back felt after a day, much less a lifetime of this. As she made her way around, worshipers would walk up to her and give her

some change. To give you an idea of her usual donation, the most valuable Ethiopian coin is worth 1/2 half a birr — about a US nickel. One member of our team stepped forward to meet her needs as well. He quietly slipped her a 100 birr bill — the equivalent $10 USD. As she pulled out her money purse from around her neck, a nearby woman stepped up and began to talk to her. It wasn’t until someone explained it that I understood what was happening. Being blind, she didn’t know how much she had been given. She couldn’t read the bill. The blind woman assumed it was only 1 birr, which was probably as big a gift as she ever got. It wasn’t until the stranger intervened that she realized the gift was 100 times what she thought. As the woman found a special place in her garment to tuck away her gift, I began to wonder how often I do the same thing. How often God gives me a gift, and I treat it

www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe

Blog: Hope4Peyton

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

was going to see me! He was going to tell him mom that he saw me! He was probably going to tell his friends about the beastly sight that forever changed the landscape of his childhood. He would more than likely have nightmares. He might need medicating. I might need medicating. I would be labeled the “naked mom” and no one would ever let their kids play at my house ever again. It would be a felony, right? Would the police let me get dressed before they took my mugshot? Yes, this is how my mind works. Scary, no? A split second decision was made and I took a dive across the room, neither graceful nor flattering, but putting me safely out of visual contact. “Mom? Can we…” “YES! YES! Whatever you want, take the car call some girls cook up some meth just DO NOT come in here!” “Why?” “Because I’m…I’m…folding laundry!” The boy voices fade safely away. Then I hear: “Your mom is really weird.” “Yup.” “She doesn’t like you to see her fold clothes?” “I don’t ask.” He’s a smart boy. www.hope4peyton.org

Would You Let This Woman Watch Your Kids? By Anissa Mayhew Take this as a warning that you may not want to let your kids spend the night over at my house. Not because anything bad happened, but OH, it could

have! The kind of stuff that when shared in the wrong setting makes people pick up their phones and call other people. People with badges and notebooks and big flashy things on their cars. See, our house is really a very casually naked house. The kids run around in the nude, they take great glee at catching me unaware with a big shiny mooning. They flop around in the buff after the shower and enjoy a sweet breeze on their gibblety-bits. No big deal. We aren’t starting a commune but we don’t run from nature’s most natural state. The danger is ME getting out of the shower and making the walk from the bathroom into the bedroom where all my clothes are. I’m just not concerned with my kids seeing me nekkid, traumatic, but no big deal. The bad thing that happened was about two steps out of the bathroom, when I was perfectly in view from the door of my bedroom (akkk OPEN!) and I heard little boy voices in my hallway and remembered that it wasn’t just my own children psyches about to be damaged by the site of my unclothed body….but the children of my friend who had given them to me to watch over…which presumably meant returning them to her unharmed and in no NEW need of therapy. I stood there damply shivering, completely frozen from my inner freak-out. He

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

as routine and mundane, just enough to get me by. What followed was a beautiful picture of grace. This woman fell down on her face and worshiped Jesus, for the great and unmerited gift she had been given. As I watched her weary bones rest and give heartfelt thanks to the King, I wondered how much I needed to do the same thing. Now that I am back in the routine of life in the States, and I am asking God to show me the true value of the gifts He has given me. My wife, my kids, and all my material possessions are unmerited gifts from Him. They are too great for me to ever earn. Most of all there is Jesus, the true gift of grace. Everyday, I know I undervalue Him, and try to tuck Him into a convenient place in my life. Instead, He is worthy of far more than what I can see through my dim mirror. He is calling for all of me to worship him. Worship him with my body, like the blind woman — but also with my time and energy — to glorify Him to the ends of the earth. I am resolved that He is worthy of all my worship, including with my pocketbook to give to the poor in Ethiopia. redletterscampaign.com/blog/

serious.health serious.extras

Science

Ice Age Civilizations

By James Nienhuis

(The following is the introduction to Nienhuis’s book, “Ice Age Civilizations”. Serious.Life Magazine encourages you to purchase this book. It is a fascinating look at how the ancients navigated and mapped the entire earth.)

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

The precise measurements and religious observances of the apparent movements of the sun and constellations of stars, in their orderly and predictable courses in the sky, was a great passion for the ancients, and such is reflected in their

legends, megalithic buildings, and navigation maps, which reveal the ancients’ awareness of the solar equinoxes and solstices, and also, which reveal that they actually measured the precession of the earth’s axis, the slow gyroscope-like wobble of the earth’s axis in space, that would cycle once in 25,920 years. Those ancients could measure the earth with this knowledge because it allowed them to accurately calculate the radius and, so then, the circumference of the earth, and thereby, they were prepared to execute measurements for the accurate mapping and

navigation of much of the globe within a few centuries during the Ice Age. Their star-mapping techniques allowed them to locate geographical points on the earth by measurements of the apparent movement of the locations of constellations from year to year, relative to the circle of the horizon, this apparent movement of the constellations is the visible manifestation of the earth’s slow wobble, like a gyroscope in space. The Great Pyramid of Giza in Egypt is an embodiment of their ancient earthmeasuring capabilities, and

Get a FREE subscription: www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe its astronomicallyderived dimensions reveal the ancients’ precession-measuring, and thereby, their earthmeasuring capabilities. The Great Pyramid is on the ancient Prime Meridian (Greenwich England is on today’s Prime Meridian), and so, the mapping and surveying in ancient times was with the Great Pyramid as the geographical base reference- point, and therewith, ancient megalithic sites are

at key precession- derived distances away from the Great Pyramid. Some ancient maps, to be discussed, prove that the ancients were mapping

10000 B.C., when cavemen were supposedly just learning to farm with stone tools and live in crude villages, and also (ostensibly), to build large

THE ANCIENTS MAPPED AND NAVIGATED THE GLOBE. and navigating the globe during the Ice Age. So then, should we actually believe that this occurred before

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

>> SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

seaworthy vessels with precise navigation equipment to navigate and chart much of the globe? Advanced navigation and mapping doesn’t really come to mind when one considers the image of the “cavemen” of pop archaeology. Supposedly anomalous ancient submerged megalithic constructions are found resting on shallow seafloors near the shorelines in various parts of the world, and with the popular notion that the Ice Age ended around 10000 B.C., it follows that these well-designed and obviously manmade structures of massive hewed and fitted megaliths were built before then, before the end of the Ice Age, and when the Ice Age ended, the snow and ice melted and poured into the sea, to raise sea level a few hundred feet for the submergence of roughly 25 million square miles of land. Mainstream scientists have a major quandary here, should they say that mankind has been navigating the high seas and building advanced megalithic structures since before 10000 B.C., the orthodox timeframe for the end of the Ice Age, or should they say that the Ice Age

(continued next page) 65

serious.health serious.extras

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

Science

actually ended after their own date of circa 2000 B.C. for the characteristic forms and functions of these megalithic structures which are now on the seafloor? The many confirmed submerged megalithic structures, which are found off the coasts of Malta, Egypt, Greece, Lebanon, Spain, India, China, and Japan, are ignored or feebly rationalized by most mainstream scientists, so I urge you to rigorously investigate the reality of these submerged megaliths, and understand the implications of their presence on the seafloor. Great pictures of some of these submerged megaliths can be viewed at www.GrahamHancock.com and www.Morien-Institute.org, so please access these as you read. The ancient navigation maps which we will analyze show accuracies of east-west distances (longitudes) which would not be matched until the late 1700’s A.D., with the invention and use of Harrison’s Chronometer, so the ancients were obviously measuring the earth with another instrument, which was the archaeometer, or Celtic Cross, a form of which are the pieces of an ancient measuring device known as the Dixon Relics which were discovered within the Great Pyramid in the 19th century by Piazzi Smith. This Celtic Cross (the archaeometer) measuring device was a circular hub affixed to the center of a cross, which was memorialized with graveyard tombstones and

jewelry designs, and which, in its original form and function, allowed the ancients to master the measurement of the earth, and thereby, feel a sense of empowerment because of their unusual knowledge about the special relationship of precession time to the dimensions of the earth. The sun was worshipped as the life-giver by these ancients, who also saw cosmic drama being played-out in the apparent movement of the constellations because of precession, so when these sun worshipping measurers-of-the-

earth navigated and settled the globe during the Ice Age, from their original homeland in the Middle East/Egypt, they built megalithic ceremonial tieredplazas and pyramids which are astronomically aligned to measure the solstices and equinoxes of the sun, and they built stone-circles like Stonehenge which are celestial clocks, with which they marked the progress of the constellations’ slow apparent movement along the circle of the horizon, caused by the slow wobble of the earth’s axis, which would cycle once in

www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe 25,920 years. Some of these structures are now on the seafloor because they were submerged when the sea level rose a few hundred feet when the Ice Age icepack melted to pour into the sea. At that time, the snow-blitz of the Ice Age had ended, along with the heavy rains in the middle latitudes, which had made the now-arid Sahara, Middle East, and Indus regions, wellwatered grasslands and forests during the Ice Age, so that massive climate change, within a matter of decades at the close of the Ice Age, caused vast swaths of those previously lush lands to become deserts, and so, to depopulate significantly beginning at around 1500 B.C. Think about it, why would

those ancients choose to initially settle in environments such as those of present day Egypt, the Middle East, and northwest India, which are now mostly parched desert wastelands? They settled in these regions because, before about 1500 B.C., these lands were lush and fruitful, and admittedly near big rivers, but the civilizations in those regions of Egypt, Sumer (Babylon), Elam (Persia), and the Indus-Sarasvati, declined rapidly when the rainfall precipitously declined at the end of the Ice Age, when even the Sarasvati River which was the life-blood of the IndusSarasvati civilization driedup, and when the fruitful grasslands and forests of these

earliest ancient civilizations became the desolate deserts which they are today. In â&#x20AC;&#x153;Ice Age Civilizationsâ&#x20AC;? I present evidence that will cause you to reconsider the popularly held notions about our ancient history which are stubbornly adhered to by mainstream academicians. Keep in mind that mainstream scientists also cannot explain the cause of the Ice Age, so we will explore its necessitated cause as we analyze the origins and early migrations of humankind. ~

Author and speaker, James Nienhuis has a B.Sc. in Earth Sciences from Dartmouth College. His blog is www.dancingfromgenesis.com

Sarasvati River Paleodrainage

Imagine the combined riverflows of the Ganges, Indus, and Jamuna Rivers of India, in one river, flowing down from the Himalayas to the Arabian Sea off Pakistan, that was the flow of the ancient Sarasvati River of ancient hindu vedic literature, which was said to have flowed so wide that one could not see the other bank.

www.dancingfromgenesis.com Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference. Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

serious.health serious.extras

Funeral Plans

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

When It Comes Unexpectedly, Know What to Ask

He is 18, just graduated from high school, works in the family business and has a bright future. In the early morning hours of a Saturday, he veers into the oncoming lane of traffic on a road that seldom sees any traffic at that time of day. He dies within minutes of the crash. She will receive her B.A. degree in just a few weeks and has already been accepted into officer candidate school for a career in the U. S. Marine Corps. She is found dead. Alone. The coroner will have to determine the cause of death. The parents will wait to bring closure to her life. They are expecting their first child any day. She goes to the doctor on Thursday morning and everything is fine … the doctor will probably induce labor over the weekend. Saturday morning the baby is delivered. Still born. He is a brilliant, passionate young surgeon. Two small children. Beautiful wife. Well loved in the community and in the church where they worship and serve. She receives a phone call from the county sheriff … her husband has been found on a side road in another county. Self-inflicted bullet wound. He awakens in the early

morning hours, goes to the bathroom, returns to bed and falls across the mattress. Dead from a massive heart attack. There were no warning signs. Death is an unavoidable fact of life, but how do we prepare ourselves for the inevitable, and what does the survivor need to know about making final arrangements for a loved one? Most of us spend more time getting ready to go shopping at the mall than we do preparing for that final breath taken in this life. I have sat with hundreds of people while they made funeral arrangements for a loved one. Seldom are they prepared for this emotional roller coaster. I’ve seen funeral directors with great compassion. Far too often, I’ve seen the opposite … someone working on a commission from the sale of funeral goods and services, pressuring people into buying what they don’t need, paying for it with money they don’t have. It is a good idea to have a trusted friend go with you to the funeral home to help you avoid decisions you may later regret. Most states require certain

information to process a death certificate and disposition (burial or cremation) permit: social security number … name and state or country of birth of the decedent’s parents (the maiden name of the mother of the decedent) … any burial policies or insurance policies you plan to use for payment of funeral costs. Most funeral homes will require payment in full prior to a funeral service or burial, and many funeral homes will not accept payment from an estate of life insurance policy simply because it may be months before the money is available. If the decedent was a veteran or spouse of a veteran, and you want your loved one buried in a national cemetery, you will need the official discharge papers from the military. This document is known as a DD-214 and should not be confused with a framed discharge document. If you cannot produce a DD-214, you may still be able to have the burial at a national cemetery, but it may take up to 2-3 weeks for the military to research your claim. Ask if the funeral home or

www.seriouslifemagazine.com/subscribe cemetery arranges for military honors or leaves that up to you. Is there a fee for military honors? (Usually there is no fee, but some units will accept a donation.) Some honor units will provide a rifle team only for active military or for officers. If you want “full honors” (which includes flag folding, playing of taps, rifle team, and pall bearers), you will need to request full honors. You need to know that in most states, there is an hierarchy of persons with the legal right to make the arrangements and sign the documents for a burial or cremation. And sometimes the person with the right of disposition can make life very, very difficult for the rest of the family. Embalming is not required

in all cases. Ask your funeral provider if embalming is required for your situation. Know what your budget will allow and stay within your budget. Often an arrangement counselor will try to sell you a more expensive casket with “options” such as a sealing gasket, a memory drawer, or a special liner … all for the purpose of increasing his or her sales commission. Neither the casket nor the vault protects your loved one from the natural elements, nor do they necessarily slow down the decaying process. If you are “shopping around” for prices, get the details. You may be shocked at just how many “extras” can be added to a price quote. Does that price include having your loved one picked up and brought to the

Our ads our interactively linked to the sponsor website, and sponsors also get a free website banner ad. For more information and pricing,

www.seriouslifemagazine.com/advertising Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference. Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

funeral home? Is there a fee for extra mileage? If there is a coroner involved, ask what the coroner’s fee is (these fees vary from county to county). Are there extra fees for autopsy repair? If there is a delay in making arrangements or having a burial, will you be charged for each day of refrigeration? If you decide to purchase a casket elsewhere, many mortuaries will require that you be present when the casket is delivered to inspect it for damage and to sign for it. You can almost always match a casket price, or even provide a better quality casket for a lower price than what people can buy from the funeral home. Cremations are far less expensive and are acceptable within most (not all) religious faiths. Perhaps one of the greatest gifts you can give to your family today is that of prearranging your funeral. This might include purchasing a funeral policy which, in many cases, can lock in the cost of your funeral at today’s prices; or it might mean simply writing down the information needed at the time of your death. Other considerations include how you want your funeral to be carried out: speaker(s), music, video tribute, flowers, casket / urn, etc. Just having your desires written down lifts a tremendous burden from your family. You can find out more about Greg England by visiting his blog: gregengland.com ~

serious.health serious.extras

Humor

Why parents go gray... The boss wondered why one of his most valued employees had not phoned in sick one day. Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he dialed the employee’s home phone number and was greeted with a child’s whisper. “ Hello ?“ “Is your daddy home?” he asked. “ Yes ,” whispered the small voice. May I talk with him?” The child whispered, “ No .” Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss

asked, “Is your Mommy there?” “ Yes .” “May I talk with her?” Again the small voice whispered, “ No .” Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, “Is anybody else there?” “ Yes ,” whispered the child, “ a policeman “. Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee’s home, the boss asked, “May I speak with the policeman?” “ No, he’s busy “, whispered the child. “Busy doing what?” “ Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman ,” came the whispered answer. Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the background through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, “What is that noise?” “A helicopter “ answered the whispering voice. “What ! is going on there?” demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive. Again, whispering, the child answered, “ The search team just landed a helicopter .” Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated the

boss asked, “What are they searching for?” Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle... “ ME .” ~~~

The mind is a terrible thing to waste...

An 80 year old couple were having problems remembering things, so they decided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothing was wrong with them. When they arrived at the doctor’s, they explained to the doctor about the problems they were having with their memory. After checking the couple out, the doctor tells them that they were physically okay but might want to start writing things down and make notes to help them remember things. The couple thanked the doctor and left. Later that night while watching TV, the old man got up from his chair and his wife asks, “Where are you going?” He replies, “To the kitchen.” She asks, “Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?” He replies, “Sure.”She then asks him, “Don’t you think you should write it down so you can remember it?” He says, “No, I can remember that.” She then says, “Well I also would like some strawberries on top. You had better write that down cause I know you’ll forget that.” He says, “I can remember that, you want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries.” She replies, “Well I also would like whipped

Got something funny you want us to include? Email it to editor@seriouslifemagazine.com cream on top. I know you will forget that so you better write it down.” With irritation in his voice, he says, “I don’t need to write that down I can remember that.” He then fumes into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes he returns from the kitchen and hands her a plate of bacon and eggs. She stares at the plate for a moment and says, “You forgot my toast.” ~~~

The atheist...

An atheist was spending a quiet day fishing when suddenly his boat was attacked by the Loch Ness monster. In one easy flip, the beast tossed him and his boat at least a hundred feet into the air. The monster then opened its mouth while waiting below to swallow man and boat. As the man sailed head over heels and started to fall towards the open jaws of the ferocious beast he cried out, “Oh, my God! Help me!” Suddenly, the scene froze in place. As the atheist hung in midair, a booming voice came out of the clouds and said, “I thought you didn’t believe in Me!” “God, come on, give me a

break!” the man pleaded, “Just seconds ago I didn’t believe in the Loch Ness monster either!” “Well,” said God, “now that you are a believer you must understand that I won’t work miracles to snatch you from certain death in the jaws of the monster, but I can change hearts. What would you have me do?” The atheist thinks for a minute and then says, “God, please have the Loch Ness Monster believe in You also.” God replies, “So be it.” The scene starts in motion again

with the atheist falling towards the ravenous jaws of the ferocious beast. Then the Loch Ness Monster folds his claws together and says, “Lord, bless this food You have so graciously provided.....” ~~~

Dangerous Comic

Click on the video image below for to see THE WORLD’S MOST DANGEROUS COMIC. www.brentriggsstuff.com/ detail.asp?submissionid=64

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference. Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

serious.health serious.extras

Reader Recipes

The following recipes were taken from the “Adoption Cookbook”. The pics are from the cookbok. If you would to purchase it, go here.

Pull Apart Bacon Bread Ingredients: 12 diced bacon strips or Bacon bits     1 loaf frozen bread dough, thawed 2 tbsp. olive oil, divided                        1 c. mozzarella cheese, shredded 1 envelope ranch salad dressing mix Directions: Cook bacon. Drain on paper towels. Roll out bread dough to 1/2 in thickness; brush with 1 tbsp. oil. Cut in 1 in. pieces. Put in large bowl. Add bacon, cheese, dressing mix and

rest of oil. Toss to coat.  Make pieces into 9x5 oval on a baking sheet; layering.  Cover and let rise for 30 min.  Bake 350 for 15 min.  Cover with foil, bake 5-10 min. longer.   Submitted by Marcia, Grandmother of Aleigha and Mya, Guatemala

Creamy Crab Dip Ingredients: 8 oz. imitation crab meat 8 oz. cream cheese 8 oz. sour cream 2 tbsp. minced onion 2 tsp. dill weed Directions: Chop or food process crab meat. Add all the other ingredients and mix thoroughly. Chill overnight Serve with crackers.

Submitted by Jessica, mother of Jackson and Aiden, Guatemala

S E R I O U S . L I F E . M A G A Z I N E TM

NOVEMBER 2008

Holiday Appetizer Dip

Hope, China 74

Ingredients: 1 (8 oz.) pkg. cream cheese, softened 2 tbsp. milk 1 – 2 ½ oz. jar sliced dried beef, finely snipped (about ¾ cup) 2 tbsp. instant minced onion 2 tbsp. finely chopped green pepper 1/8 tsp. pepper ½ cup sour cream ¼ cup coarsely chopped walnuts

Directions: Blend cream cheese and milk. Stir in dried beef, onion, green pepper and pepper. Mix well. Stir in sour cream. Spoon into 8-inch pie plate or small shallow baking dish. Sprinkle walnuts over top. Bake in moderate oven (350 degrees) for 15 minutes. Serve hot with assorted crackers. Submitted by Phyllis, mother of Kristen, Guatemala

Shrimp Cantellinee’ Ingredients: 1 lb shrimp (cooked or uncooked) or fake crabmeat 2 cloves garlic (chopped in small pieces) 1 tomato, chopped ½ lg. green pepper, chopped 1 onion, chopped 1/3 cup virgin olive oil 1 stick butter 1 package fettuccini ½ cup red wine ½ tablespoon dill weed ½ cup Parmesan cheese ½ tablespoon seasoning salt

Directions: Put olive oil and butter in pan on medium heat. Add chopped garlic, onions and green peppers. Add meat and cook for 7-10 minutes. In another pan, boil water and cook noodles. Add tomatoes and wine, simmer 4-5 min (while noodles are cooking). Add noodles and stir. Add dill weed and cheese slowly, stir and keep on low heat. Add seasoning salt, stir. Serve while hot.

Got a recipe you want us to print? Email it to recipes@seriouslifemagazine.com Submitted By Wendy, mother of Emily Rumki, Calcutta, India and Melody Lishan Faith, Zhanjiang, Guangdong Providence, China

Romanian Chicken Breasts Ingredients: 3 lg. Chicken breasts, halved ¼ c Oil Salt and Pepper 1 c Diced Beef 1 c Chopped onion ¾ c Chopped celery ½ tsp. Basil 2 can (6-oz) Tomato Paste 1 can (13.75-oz) Chicken Broth 1 tbsp. Parsley ½ lb Spaghetti

Submitted by Ann, mother of Alyse Marie, Romania

Shrimp Curry Ingredients: ¾ c. Flour 3 ½ Tbsp curry 4 tsp salt ½ tsp ginger 2 ½ tsp sugar 1 c. minced onion 1 c. pared, diced apple ¾ c. chicken broth 2 c. milk 3 Tbsp butter 3 lbs shrimp, shelled, deveined 1 ½ lbs fresh mushroom caps (or cut mushrooms) ¼ c melted butter 2 Tbsp lemon juice 2 c. cooked rice

Directions: Mix the first 5 ingredients and set aside. Sauté onion

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

Submitted By Wendy, mother of Emily Rumki, Calcutta, India and Melody Lishan FaithZhanjiang, Guangdon Providine, China

and apple in ¾ c. butter until tender. Blend in the flour mixture. Slowly stir in broth and milk. Simmer until thickened, stir often. Remove from heat. Sauté shrimp in 3T butter. Drain and add to curry sauce. Place mushroom caps (I cut them into bite size pieces instead of leaving them whole) in shallow pan and brush with melted butter, broil 3 minutes. Turn and brush with butter (I stir them), broil 3 more minutes. Add mushrooms to curry sauce. Add lemon juice. Serve over hot rice.

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

Directions: Brown chicken breasts in oil. Season with salt and pepper. Remove from pan. To oil, add beef, onion, celery and basil; simmer 5 minutes, stirring. Add paste and broth. Return chicken, cover and simmer 1 hour or until done. Turn occasionally. Add parsley and serve over cooked

spaghetti.

Andrea Marisol, Guatemala 75

Ten percent of ad revenue goes to charities that make a real difference Click this ad and visit our advertiser.

SERIOUS.LIFE.MAGAZINE

NOVEMBER 2008

W W W. S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M T M

ADVERTISING@SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

The New America Brent Riggs

Fast or Slow, Change is Here... Are you Ready?

works. Keeping people fired up means power for a select few. You cannot build character and courage by taking away men’s initiative and independence. An increasing majority in America look to the government to cure all ills, and solve all problems. The result: a decline in personal responsibility and freedom which is bad for all... except the government, but that’s the whole point, isn’t it? ~

SERIOUSLIFEMAGAZINE.COM

producers who will vote you into office. Sadly for America, the nonproducers are the majority now. You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong. We live in a lowest common denominator mindset where the achiever is chopped off at the knees in a misguided policy of affirmation and equality. You strengthen the weak by having the strong as their example and goal, as well as their teacher, not by destroying the strong.

Both political parties are headed in the same direction... the speed is the only variable

You cannot bring prosperity by discouraging thrift. Out of control materialism and predatory lenders have created multiple generations who impulsively buy lifestyle on credit and believe it be their right. The overall amount of debt in our country is BEYOND comprehension. The borrower is slave to the lender. You cannot lift the wage earner up by pulling the wage payer down. You would think this is common sense and yet the business owner is the most taxed, most attacked and most maligned entity in our societal model, portrayed consistently as lucky, greedy and crooked. You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred. And yet, class warfare is the method of choice for most special interest groups. Why? Because it

W R I T E U S AT: L E T T E R S @ S E R I O U S L I F E M A G A Z I N E . C O M

was thinking about how life in America is changing. Regardless of who is elected this week, change is certain... it’s just a matter of how fast. And none of it is good. Whether big government Republicans or Socialist Democrats, we’re going in ONE direction... the speed is the only variable. Consider the following things Abe Lincoln said and think about how far we’ve come from his words: You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich. Our entire political system is built on this tactic. Democrats deny it while openly praticing it. Big government Republicans claim conservatism while quietly going about doing just the opposite. Why? Power. Control. Personal political ambition. Socialism, spreading the wealth, “fairness”... all terms for taking from producers to give to non-

redletterscampaign.com