One For The Road

“...this guy was following us down the Autobahn on his motorbike, it was like something out of The Terminator, we couldn’t lose him.” Orchards regale an awkward journey down the Autobahn in Germany, love in Paris and touring as a menstruator.

Imagine the scene, stand still traffi c just outside of Cardiff after travelling all day from Brighton. There had been a major incident just outside of the city centre and we were due for load in literally 30 mins. Lucy was on her period (which honestly happens every time we have to travel, it’s like it knows) and it had got to the point where she desperately needed to change her pad. So, all the lads got out the van and covered as much of every window as they possibly could. Holding coats up so the stationary cars around us couldn’t see in. There’s often close calls when you’re on tour as a menstruator but that was for sure a unique moment and hopefully one she doesn’t have to re-live! We fi nally got to the venue just in time to load in. The venue was an old bus drivers’ social club. To say the locals drinking in the bar weren’t the most savoury of characters is understatement, after our show and a couple of disagreements later we left for Brighton. Heavy journey.

When we were on tour in Europe in 2018 we stopped at a service station on our way to Hamburg. We ended up talking to a motorcyclist who was asking if we were in a band etc. Ended up letting him know we were on our way to Hamburg to play a show to which he said “Ahhh I have no plans, I’ll come to Hamburg with you for the rock n roll show”. We all thought he was joking, so we jumped back in the van, got back on the motorway and thought nothing more of it. Then, 10 minutes later our tour manager alerted us to the fact this guy was following us down the Autobahn on his motorbike, it was like something out of The Terminator, we couldn’t lose him.

Finally after a swift manoeuvre from our tour manager Jon, we took the quickest of turns into this tiny German town and hid in a McDonalds car park. We got to the venue and were all looking over our shoulders thinking he was going to pop out somewhere and terminate us all.

On a more positive note, we fi rst played in Europe in 2017. We played a sold out show in Paris and met some lovely people after the show at the merch table. When we played in Paris again a year later a couple came up to us at the merch table again, they said they had both met whilst watching our set a year before, they were now a couple and were expecting a baby. The smallest Orchards fan ever! We were hoping they would have said they called their kid Peggy, but no dice.

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