The Herald Indoor /Outdoor CAR BOOT SALE

PO Box 8, Markfield, Leics. LE67 9ZT Tel: 01530 244069 info@markfieldherald.co.uk www.markfieldherald.co.uk

Saturday 9th September 9am - 12 noon at the

Copt Oak Memorial Hall, LE67 9QB (Next to the Copt Oak pub)

Trinity Methodist Church Markfield

SERVICES & INFORMATION www.markfieldmethodistchurch.org

FB: Markfield Methodist Church

Sunday 13th August

10.30 a.m. Morning worship

Sunday 20th August

10.30 a.m. Morning worship

3.00 p.m. CTiM United Service at Ulverscroft Priory

Sunday 27th August

2.30 p.m. Welcome Service for Rev Jimi Kaci

Sunday 3rd September

10.30 a.m. Morning worship

Sunday 10th September

10.30 a.m. Morning worship

Sunday 17th September

10.30 a.m. CTiM United Service

The Herald is a monthly local magazine delivered free to approximately 4,000 homes and businesses in Markfield, Field Head, Stanton under Bardon, Thornton and Bagworth. Contact Mike Wilkinson with your articles, news items or advertising enquiries.

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Outdoor £5 – no need to book Indoor £10 – must be booked

Entrance 50p - children free

Booking or further details ring 0116 2674746 or 01530 244229

We extend an invitation for you to join us for worship as well as at our other regular activities. You will be made most welcome.

Music Cafe

Thursday 24th August, 14th September, 28th September

Don’t be on your own - have a change of scenery & join us for a music-based afternoon of friendship, fun & refreshments on the 2nd & 4th Thursdays of the month. For more information please contact Linda on 01530 242607.

“Come for a Cuppa”

Every Wednesday 10.00 - 12.00

Come and meet each other on Wednesday mornings. There is no charge for the refreshments and you can “borrow a book”. Just come through the main church building and you’ll find us in the back room.

Coffee Morning for Christian Aid

Saturday 16th September 10.00 - 12.00

(More information can be found on the front page.)

Harvest Ploughman’s Lunch

Saturday 23rd September at 12 o’clock

We invite you to join us for lunch as part of our Harvest Thanksgiving weekend. The cost is £8.

For more information & tickets please contact Linda & Bill on 01530 242607 or Ann & Ian on 01530 242166.

Amusing Signs

On the trucks of a plumbing company: “Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”

Pizza shop slogan: “7 days without pizza makes one weak.”

Sign over a gynecologist’s office “Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”

Door of a plastic surgeon’s office: “Hello. Can we pick your nose?”

On an electrician’s truck: “Let us remove your shorts.”

In a non-smoking area: “If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.”

On a maternity room door: “Push. Push. Push.”

At the electric company: “We would be de-lighted if you pay your bill. However, if you don’t, you will be.”

In a restaurant window: “Don’t stand there and be hungry. Come on in and get fed up.”

In the front yard of a funeral home: “Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”