Nov/Dec 2021
Tips
to feeling happier in your own skin
www.businessfitmagazine.com
Bisila ko Boko
bal lo g o t l a c lo m ies fro n a p m o c g in k Ta
Society of Hispanic Entrepreneurs S.H.E is an organization which functions at local, national and international levels to advance women in personal and business development. It focusses on equality for women and girls through advocacy, education, philanthropy and much more. Using SHE’s three pillars of Mindset, Body and Spirituality, we create business with amazing purpose aligned with the United Nations Sustainable Development Goals for the world.
Join the Ambassador program now and become a leader for Latinas in your community Connect with us. Together is Better info@hispanasemprendedoras.eu | +32 468 21 88 87 | +1 (281) 703-1135 (USA)
Dear Business Fit readers, I just feel thankful, thankful to be surrounded with such an amazing team who has made this last issue of the year possible. To my dear Claire, the editor in chief and Leo the master behind the design I cannot thank you enough for your support and willingness to help me in my hardest moments. But hey life it’s about that, it is about thriving and about being vulnerable, about being the best version of yourself and I believe that I have done something good to deserve people like you. I am thankful to all the contributors who have become part of the family Business Fit. Our previous cover had our great friends Lilli and Maike, we are thankful to have you ladies. These last two year have been a crazy rollercoaster for me when I decided to take care of my health and when the team knew I was not well enough they stepped forward ...this act of kindness shows me that the world can be better, that we all can be better. We all need that right now. To be compassionate and be there for one other. You do not know what another person is going through. When those miracles start happening, they do not stop. I have had an offer for the first issue in 2022 and we will be six years old in January . To celebrate we will be having some little changes and we will be keeping you informed about them in our social media. Of course I recommend this issue with the amazing Bisila Bokoko on our cover, her incredible life of achievement and her passion as a philanthropist, as well as many other spectacular articles that will help you to move forward in these difficult times. Business Fit has helped me to move on, with the team we have created.
So one of the most powerful values today would be gratitude to all of those who are there for you no matter what. So thanks to my family and last but not least to my dearest Viola Edward, who has been there for me since the very beginning in 2016. Thank you all for showing me that together we are stronger and that Together is always better.
I love you all Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year 2022
Verónica Sosa Publisher www.businessfitmagazine.com
FIT FEATURES
Education - p46 The Changing Face of Education Zeynep Dereli
The Importance of Sleep for Brain Function Ben Rein p8
Body
The Business of Being Body Positive Sara MarsdenShreeve p18
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Hearing the Alarm Bells Viola Edward p12 Stop the Blaming Game Penelope Magoulianiti p16 Navigating the Mess in the Middle Lynda Holt p28 Earth spins. So do we. Veronica George p42
Bisila Bokoko p32
New Mindset New Results Sam Mills p54
What Motivates People Is What Motivates People Don Zillioux p6 Becoming a Sidepreneur MaL!sh p22 Stability and continuity of family and business. Next Generation. Elena Howarth p56
Publisher & Founder Verónica Sosa Business Fit International Advisory Board Viola Edward Vikki Thomas
REACH OUT For information on advertising or placing an article in Business Fit Contact us: Email: editorbfm@gmail.com Phone: +32 472 134 230
Contributors Ben Rein Bisila Bokoko Don Zillioux Elena Howarth Ghislaine Bouskila Irmela Neu Jules Francis Lynda Holt MaL!sh Penelope Magoulianiti Sam Mills Sara Marsden-Shreeve Veronica George Viola Edward Zeynep Dereli General Editorial Coordinator Claire Morley
The Power of Intention Irmela Neu p50
Art and Design Director Leo Collier-Bett Hitting the Reset Button Jules Francis p18
Graphic Designer Adverts Javier Sanchez
Health
Healing from the Inside Out Ghislaine Bouskila p14
Copyright © 2021 by Verónica Sosa. All rights reserved. This Magazine or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher.
M-20318-2017
5
Business
What Motivates People Is What Motivates People
6
Thought leader and senior advisor in effective change management, Don Zillioux, Ph.D., points out how it is not possible to motivate people, it is a very objective emotion and is individual to each person.
Q: What really motivates people? A: What people want is what motivates them.
Most top managers and personnel departments act as if they had the inside track on sprinkling “motivation dust” from on high. A salesman with a major corporation was sprinkled thus. One year he ranked in the top 20 salespeople for his company. He got a letter from headquarters: “Congratulations. Because of your outstanding record, we are taking you and your wife to Bermuda for the week with the other top salespeople.” He called his boss. “How much is it going to cost the company to fly my wife and me to Bermuda and wine and dine us for a week?” His boss said, “Between $8,000 and $10,000.” The fellow said, “Good! Send me a cheque.” His boss and everyone in the company got very upset. They thought he was disloyal, unappreciative, and a money-grabber. Concerned about these impressions, he finally called his boss and said, “I’m a little confused. Is going to Bermuda with my wife part of my job? If it is, we would love to go. But if Bermuda is a reward for my accomplishments, send me the money. I’d like to take my wife and four kids to Hawaii.” This story points out a reality that most managers don’t understand: What motivates people is what motivates people. If you recognise the truth in that statement, you will quickly understand both the good news and the bad news about motivation. The bad news is that you can’t motivate people. The good news is that if you can find out what motivates some of your employees and provide them with the opportunity to satisfy their needs, they will do good work for you. How do you tell what motivates people? First, ask them! Our salesman would have been much happier if his boss had simply asked him what
he wanted as a reward for his outstanding sales record. If you would rather not ask people, then observe them. Watch what they do with their free time. For example, suppose one of your staff loves to play golf. The motivator for that person might be a chance to play on an outstanding golf course in another area. If you understand what motivates people, you can avoid a lot of performance problems. Suppose you have a person who’s done terrific work. You say, “Ed, I’ve gotten you a really good raise.” But maybe money is not an issue for Ed. His wife works, they both have good incomes. What Ed wants is more responsibility and opportunity for growth. You say to another employee, “Alice, you’ve done such a wonderful job, I’m giving you more responsibility.” But maybe Alice is hurting for money and likes her job. What she wants is a raise. So you’ve “missed the boat” with both people, and it will show up in future performance or turnover. Once you know what motivates a person, how can you improve performance? You have to make a deal: If they do well, they will get such and such. The power of matching organisational to individual needs was illustrated by a manager of a small company. At the beginning of every fiscal year, he set goals with each of his people. Then he said, “If you accomplish these objectives and the company does well, this is what I will pay you. Rather than money, is there anything you would prefer?” One of his employees who was a divorcee with two children dreaded Saturdays because of all she had to accomplish. What she wanted was Wednesday afternoons off. The person who kept the books asked to have his master’s degree in accounting paid for by the company. Another woman, married to a macho truck driver who didn’t believe in stylish cars, requested the use of a company car. The point I am trying to make is: You can’t motivate people. But if you can discover what does motivate individuals in your company, and find a way to reward them with what they want, they will do better work for you. That sounds like a win-win situation to me.
Don is an author, founder and chief scientist of Strategic Development Worldwide. Don is the co-founder of TinyClassroomTraining.com, the highly effective and newly released on-line soft skills training for supervisors and managers. He is the author of The Results-Focused Organization, the Field Guides for Managers and Supervisors and Effective Instrument Based Training. www.sdwnet.com & donz@sdwnet.com
7
Body
The Importance of
Sleep for Brain Function 8
Neuroscientist, Ben Rein, Ph.D., tells us why cutting out a few hours sleep to get more done is counter-productive and just how important enough sleep each night is for our heath and for us to be fully productive. The brain is a remarkably powerful organ, handling an incredibly high volume of complex functions daily. To manage this intense and constant workload, the brain rightfully requires a significant amount of restorative rest. As a scientist trained in the workings of the brain, I’ve learned extensively about the importance of sleep for brain function. However, it has been my observation that perhaps the most alarming - and unfortunately, the most common misunderstanding of the brain that most people hold is about the importance of sleep. Many seem to view sleep as an expendable, unimportant time of the day which can be altered freely depending on one’s needs. More work? That’s okay, I’ll just cut a few hours of sleep tonight. Late night out? No problem - I usually feel fine with just a few hours of sleep anyhow! This way of thinking must change, especially for those who aspire to be productive and efficient operators. It is not only my opinion that sleep is important; there are decades of scientific and medical studies demonstrating the importance of sleep, and the health risks associated with sleep deprivation. Here I will outline the general health risks associated with sleep deficiency and provide actionable methods to improve your sleep quality. As someone who routinely sleeps 8-9 hours per night, I can assure you that the impact of sufficient and effective sleep can be immediately felt and observed in your daily performance. I hope that this article will provide you with the understanding and tools to experience those improvements yourself.
The impact of sleep deprivation A remarkable number of important functions depend upon sufficient sleep, including your ability to maintain attention, and tasks that involve working memory(1). Have you noticed feeling much less sharp after a bad night of sleep? Perhaps you struggle to manage multiple tasks at work, or you have trouble following presentations. Indeed, these may be signs that you’re not getting enough sleep. Interestingly, sleep deprivation can also impair more basic
9
Body
functions such as the ability to detect and discriminate between emotional states based on facial expressions(1). Sleep deprivation can also alter the systems in the brain that regulate reward processing, which can lead to altered risk-taking behaviours and impulsivity(1). There is conceptual basis to believe that these alterations in brain function may also bias a sleep deprived person to select more energy-dense, unhealthy food options(2). Compounding with this, sleep deprivation can alter glucose metabolism and reduce insulin sensitivity(2), and is associated with increased hunger(2) and greater rates of obesity(3). Sleep has a profound impact on mood, and poor sleep can increase risk for depression(3) and anxiety(4). In the long term, compromised sleep can predispose to dementia, diabetes, and cardiovascular disease(4).
Methods for improving your sleep First, let’s keep it simple: get more sleep. Prioritising sleep has been one of the greatest and most important decisions of my life. If you are able, try extending your sleep by one or even two hours a night (or 30 minutes, if that’s all you have time for) and see how you feel. Sleep extension has been shown to improve many of the metabolic consequences of sleep loss including glucose regulation, insulin sensitivity and appetite, with additional improvements in mood(2). The average adult should aim for at least seven hours of sleep per night, though I would personally recommend eight hours for optimal function. Stay on schedule. Another important lesson in sleep health is maintaining a consistent sleep schedule. Aim to get in bed and wake up at roughly the same time each day. I’ve been using the same schedule for so long (10pm–7am) that I’ve never owned or used an alarm clock. Sticking to a consistent schedule will make the most effective use of your body’s natural sleep regulation systems. In contrast, inconsistent bedtimes will make for more difficult wake-tosleep transitions and can lead to poorer quality sleep(5). Be committed to your schedule: instead of staying up late to finish that bit of work, head to bed and finish it in the morning. Anecdotally, I’ve found that I complete tasks more efficiently after a full night’s rest, thereby saving myself time and preserving my night of sleep.
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Improve your sleep hygiene. Sleep hygiene refers to the measures taken to obtain high quality sleep, including creating a conducive bedroom environment for uninterrupted rest. This typically involves things like maintaining a quiet/dark bedroom, turning off the TV before you go to sleep, and keeping the temperature low. Here’s what the science says. First, avoid caffeine. I go to bed at about 10pm and I never have caffeine after 3pm. Caffeine has been shown to disrupt sleep when taken near bedtime(5), so get your cup(s) in as early in the morning as possible. Also noteworthy: nicotine and alcohol can both disrupt sleep(5). Next, keep your room as quiet as possible; ambient noise will increase night-time awakenings, thereby reducing sleep quality(5). Turn off that TV! If you have ambient noise that cannot be reduced, ear plugs or white noise may be effective intervention strategies. Finally, keep a dark room. This one may be obvious, but try to prevent any sources of light (including sunlight) from waking you. Countermeasures include black-out curtains or an eye mask. Exercise can improve your sleep quality the night of(5), and long-term exercise training similarly seems to improve subjective sleep quality, particularly in those with sleep disturbances(5). The sweet spot to exercise seems to be 4-8 hours before bedtime. Many believe that exercising near bedtime has the opposite effect and may worsen sleep, but evidence actually indicates that exercising within four hours of bedtime does not impair sleep and may even improve it(5).
Stop using electronic devices before bed. We all do it – we lay in bed for the night, and just before closing our eyes, we scroll through our phone or laptop, watch TV, or even read from an electronic screen. Studies indicate that a large portion of individuals (about 90% of Americans) use electronic devices before bed, a practice which is evidenced to disrupt sleep quality(2, 3). The reason for these sleep disruptions is deeply biological: in the brain, the regions which primarily regulate circadian rhythm (called the suprachiasmatic nuclei) are largely dependent upon levels of light entering the eyes(2). Daily shifts in natural light guide the brain’s production of hormones that regulate your alertness, namely melatonin. Thus, exposure to artificial sources of light - even at low levels - may disrupt the body’s production of melatonin, and dysregulate the onset of sleepiness in the evening(3). It is recommended that you stop viewing TV, computer, and phone screens about one hour before bedtime. If possible, exposing yourself to bright natural sunlight during the day may also help enhance alertness. So how many hours do you sleep per night? After reading this, will you make any changes? I sure hope so. If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me directly!
References
1. Krause AJ, Simon EB, Mander BA, Greer SM, Saletin JM, Goldstein-Piekarski AN, et al. The sleep-deprived human brain. Nat Rev Neurosci. 2017;18(7):404-18. 2. Potter GD, Skene DJ, Arendt J, Cade JE, Grant PJ, Hardie LJ. Circadian Rhythm and Sleep Disruption: Causes, Metabolic Consequences, and Countermeasures. Endocr Rev. 2016;37(6):584-608.
Let’s keep it simple: get more sleep
3. Owens J, Adolescent Sleep Working G, Committee on A. Insufficient sleep in adolescents and young adults: an update on causes and consequences. Pediatrics. 2014;134(3):e921-32. 4. Research IoMUCoSMa. Sleep Disorders and Sleep Deprivation: An Unmet Public Health Problem. In: Colten HR AB, editor.: National Academies Press; 2006. 5. Irish LA, Kline CE, Gunn HE, Buysse DJ, Hall MH. The role of sleep hygiene in promoting public health: A review of empirical evidence. Sleep Med Rev. 2015;22:23-36.
Ben Rein, Ph.D. is a neuroscientist working in the lab of Dr. Robert Malenka at Stanford University, studying the neural basis of social behaviour. Outside of the lab, Ben is a science communicator, sharing educational science videos to an audience of >600,000 subscribers. He is also the Founder & President of the Aspiring Scientists Coalition, a community organization providing guidance to students in science. benreinresearch@gmail.com
11
Mindset & Emotion
A Service-Minded Leader is Able to Hear the Alarm Bells
Before They Ring
Personal and Corporate Advisor, Viola Edward, explains how the practice of giving and receiving are the two aptitudes which define real leadership, where a leader helps other to develop and grow beyond their expectations. To be deserving is like a bird with two wings, a dual energy that many of us long to develop. The two wings are of equal importance, one is surely receiving and the other is giving, both of which enable the free and expansive flight of the beings that we are. The development of giving and receiving can be outlined in the vocation of service. This can be practiced as a generous and responsible empathetic passion towards ourselves and others and is voluntary as love is in an environment of
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coexistence. The practice implies a number of skills such as understanding, patience, solidarity, kindness and of course the empathy that allows us to put ourselves in the shoes of others and understand their needs and aspirations. These two aptitudes are what define real leadership, because a leader is the one who helps others to develop beyond what they can imagine. They are the ones who ask themselves if they have helped the people they have guided to be more authentic, portraying the desire to serve freely, to fulfil something more than the expected, expanding their field of action with generosity and empathy, lovingly satisfying the needs of others. Their services are received with happiness, which is ultimately what giving produces.
Whenever someone asks us for help, let us realise that this person is giving us the graceful opportunity to give, that wing of our spirit which nourishes our self-esteem. This light of breaking dawn illuminates our steps, in addition to the path of the other. They, in their turn, will pass on the light contributing to the happiness of all, both the one who asks and the one who gives. This symbiosis is in accordance with the power of adaptation and creates so much collective good.
to perceive the alarm bells before they ring, to counteract the role of the relentless judge in sentencing employees. A judge is someone who stands in a desert of non-humility. Vocational service can be expressed through solidarity with the commitment to serve that goes beyond the satisfaction of the business relationship. It is the intangibles that builds customer loyalty, which is what a public, private or altruistic organisation such as an NGO will always require.
The vocation of service as a business strategy.
Service as an inner motivation is a permanent capacity and its power will depend on how freely it can be exercised. Encouraging and motivating this virtue will become a business advantage because it will generate value, enthusiasm and also personal and collective growth. This will translate into important benefits such as the consolidation of the work team in favour of the goals. Coercive actions to meet the objectives of a company will only generate uncertainty and erratic behavioural traumas in individual and group performance.
We live in a world which is changing towards an interconnected global vision. With a single click, employees and customers can make known the achievements and dissatisfactions of companies. The reputation of organisations can rise or fall in record time, when economic consequences are driven by such unsubstantiated observations. The socio-economic crises suffered by many countries have sharpened the needs of the working world: human capital, services, customers, technology and business partners. The conglomerate that encompasses society as a whole has been overcome by an existent and perceived reality, causing companies to turn their gaze towards valuation strategies that incorporate the social responsibility and vocation of service as an indispensable component for the evolution of the social amalgam of the structure. Vocation is a call or intrinsic desire to perform a certain activity, career or profession; while service is the capacity to attend, care for or protect others. The approximation of both concepts is a mixture between the material of the vocational and the immaterial of service. This implies that a person’s academic merits are not enough if he or she does not have the desire (vocation) to help and care for others. This combination has the virtue of distinguishing people from facts, which is a shift in the vision of making decisions based on facts and not on people. This shift implies another non-material asset associated with service, which is the humility
How to identify intangibles in human capital such as service vocation? Here are some clues: Positive attitude for performing their activities as a team with a perception of empathetic affinity; commitment to the fulfilment of tasks among all; linkage between those who do and what is done as the final product; honesty of feeling, vocation is born from within, it is not imposed, therefore who serves from their inner calling does not lie in their delivery; self-disposition to do with freedom for the benefit of the result; initiative to support the collective achievement, which leads to the resolution of conflicts that may delay the realisation of the objectives; willingness to give; love for what they do and with those who share that doing. Service as a vocation is a source for self-improvement and continuous improvement. Team members with a vocation for service have already won the race because they know with conviction that together it is better.
Viola Edward, is a Personal and Corporate Advisor and multi-awarded Mentor. Humanitarian, pioneer of Breathwork, emotional wellbeing/mental health fitness in the workplace since 1993. She is focused to support people in their transformation for a greater good. Co-owner of GRIT Academy, partner/ ED of Creative women Platform, Author Breathing the Rhythm of Success and Who Makes the Bed? co-author of thirteen more books. www.violaedward.com
13
Spirituality
HEALING
from the Inside Out
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Therapist, blogger, workshop facilitator and author, Ghislaine Bouskila, shares with us her spiritual journey letting go of emotional baggage and learning to heal from the inside out. My spiritual quest started over 30 years ago when after the birth of my first child, disease, despair, and a feeling of intense confusion led me on a journey to recovery. I didn’t know back then what I needed to recover from, but I certainly knew that the way I was living my life wasn’t what I was wishing for myself, or for those around me! I knew I had to let go of emotional baggage preventing me to love my life in the present tense, being able to be in my body, awake, and in my senses, seeing, hearing, and feeling life and the people surrounding me. What I discovered is that healing is the gift of life! That illness was my teacher and my body, my Guru. That health is the recovery of the parts of ourselves we had to let go of in order to feel safe, accepted and loved. I set out on a long journey which saw me changing careers and studying modalities for health and wellbeing, I had never heard about! Feng Shui was the first one to catch my attention. My life was in such disarray that I needed to reorganise it somehow. So I started from the outside in! I reorganised my home so I could feel safe because I was feeling so much fear about everything, all the time. I needed an anchor, somewhere to protect me from the outside world, somewhere I could feel nurtured and peaceful. I created a cradle to welcome my birth into a new world.
This is when Breathwork entered my life and when all the tears I hadn’t shed could be released in a gentle and safe way. This is when laughter and joy could be expressed truthfully. With Breathwork, I rebirthed. Today, I have very deep in my heart the desire to spread the word that healing is innate, accessible and the purpose of our incarnation on Earth. We are here to heal ourselves, our ancestors, and Mother Earth. We are here to learn about Love, about how to Love ourselves and others and how to allow Love in. Love is the most powerful energy there is. It heals fears and guilts and replaces them with miracles. Love is the language of Mother Earth. My journey in healing from chronic health symptoms, such as Crohn’s disease, chronic fatigue syndrome and Lyme disease combined with 20+ years of clinical practice using modalities such as kinesiology, breathwork, energy medicine and spiritual psychology has led me to create my Conscious Energy Medicine method of enquiry and healing. Conscious Energy Medicine is the medicine of love, compassion, simplicity, and truth. Conscious Energy Medicine is grounding therapy. It is in grounding, uniting, and collaborating with Mother Earth, that profound healing happens. Our healing is intertwined with the healing of the planet. Our needs and the need of Gaia are one and the same. Healing the mind to create Peace; healing the body to connect with Truth, healing the Spirit to feel Presence and healing the soul to live in Grace.
I became a Feng Shui consultant. Visiting client’s home, I realised another step was necessary indeed, for them and for me and it was time to start the profound, deep and satisfying innerhealing journey. The healing from the inside out.
Ghislaine Bouskila, is a therapist, blogger, workshop facilitator and author. She has made it her mission to share how the gentle power of the breath together with the unconditional force of Love are essential for the healing, well-being and creativity of a person. Her motto is: Now is the time to heal and Love is the way! www.consciousenergymedicine.com
15
Mindset & Emotion
STOP
the Blaming Game
Certified Transformational Coach, Speaker, Trainer and Author, Penelope Magoulianiti, explains how by showing our vulnerability and feeling the emotions we have been trying to avoid, will help us deal with victim mentality and start to heal. I’ve been asked many times during my coaching sessions, “How can I forget when I’ve suffered so much?” And usually, my reply is, “Why are you still insisting on continuing to suffer?” When we insist on reliving a painful experience, the result we create is to stay stuck in a situation
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which hurt us in the past, and we cannot move on to making a different, better life. Creating a better life requires getting rid of the victim mentality. By blaming others for something that happened a long time ago, we keep ourselves as the victims. Victim mentality is not a weakness; it’s a pattern. We’ve been blaming for so long what happened to us, it seems impossible to move on. We don’t understand that the only result we are achieving with this behaviour is to continue giving our power to those who have hurt us, even though they no longer belong to our present.
Who do you blame for things you don’t like about yourself?
For me, it has always been my father. I’ve tried so hard not to follow in his footsteps that I’ve ended up blaming him for every misfortune I’ve encountered in my adult life. When I found myself working with an incredible coach, and after hearing me complaining and blaming him for ten minutes, she asked me: “Up until when are you going to blame him? Aren’t you grown enough to become responsible for your actions?” Wow!!! DEFENSIVENESS is one of the victim mentality traits. If you feel the need to defend your actions, then this is a sign. Another trait is COMPLAINING. If you are complaining a lot about how they treated you, blaming others for your misfortunes, or finding excuses for your behaviour, then you are putting yourself in the position of the victim. Understand that EVERY VICTIM NEEDS A VILLAIN. Whenever I look for someone to blame for something that happened in the past, I put them in the position of the villain and myself in the victim’s place. And it is from this place, I have feelings of helplessness, anger, and resentment, and I feel disempowered and worn out.
Rising above is the way to move forward
I am not discounting the fact you may have had terrible experiences in the past. What I am challenging you to do, is to stop reliving them now. I know it might not be easy, but why do you insist on continuing to hurt yourself? What benefit does it serve? NOTHING. NO BENEFIT. It just keeps the pain raw and makes you feel helpless, while it destroys any chance to create a happier and more fulfilling life. The truth is, if you keep blaming you will end up destroying your health, your wealth (and I am not referring only to money), and your relationships. Not many people want to be around bitterness and anger. Not many of us want to stay in a
controlling relationship because you try to control your partner when you are in a victim mentality. You’re rejecting anything that is said to you which may be lovely and loving, and you are trying to make them say the things you want to hear because you’re afraid to let your guard down and allow yourself to become vulnerable.
You are enough
With a victim mentality, we are unable to believe we are enough. We carry this idea that there is something wrong with us. When you identify yourself as a victim, usually it is paired with something like “I am not good enough; there is something wrong with me.” Vulnerability is the way to start changing the idea you are missing something and need “fixing.” Stop blaming is doable, but it requires you to be willing to become uncomfortable. Like anything else in life, you must decide to change. Tell yourself “No More” and be inclined to let go of the past. And you will know you are on the right path when you are willing to feel negative emotions without trying to avoid or change it. If you are willing to feel the fear, if you are eager to hear the feedback without becoming defensive, without complaining, that’s when your power will start to emerge. That’s when vulnerability will crush the victim mentality any day of the week. Have a good look at your life, and answer the following questions with honesty: • • • • •
When I feel anger, who am I blaming? Am I blaming myself? Am I willing and open to feeling whatever comes up? Can you identify the thought or thoughts causing the feelings? Can I take full responsibility for how I feel?
If you find you’re in a victim mentality, start working on being more vulnerable with yourself and others. Allow yourself to feel the emotions you’ve been avoiding and hiding from for so long. And if you choose to do that, you’ll be on your way to a better life and better relationships both on a personal and a professional level.
Penelope Magoulianiti, is a Certified Transformational Coach, Speaker,
Trainer, Author of Women, Motherhood & Independence, and Creator of the Goddess Diary©. She has combined 20 years of corporate experience with her passion for personal development to create transformational training under the brand “Feminine & Powerful” for women wishing to live fulfilling lives. watch.thepowerfulfeminine.com/s/HPPWHG
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Body
The Business of Being
Body Positive
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Positive Psychology Champion and Awardwinning Image Consultant, Sara MarsdenShreeve, shares with our readers five tips to promote self-acceptance and self-worth to give you the confidence to feel happier in your own skin. In a world where people buy from people it’s so important to step out from amongst the noise of competitors and make your mark with everything you have to give that makes you and your business great. You are the face of your business and are quite aware that first impressions count, but what if you struggle embracing all that you are? You know you are an expert at what you do but you don’t feel authentic or comfortable in your own power, skin, clothes and more. Feeling unconfident in these areas can have a negative knock-on effect with your social and business interactions as well as potentially stirring up self-sabotage or steering you away from otherwise fruitful opportunities. In today’s world, it’s not surprising that more and more women (and men) are feeling like this, unsatisfied and unhappy with themselves on many levels because of the pressures exerted on them to look a certain way. That is why the body positivity movement is becoming so important to promote the acceptance of ALL bodies regardless of shape, size, colour, ability, and gender in the face of undesirable social ideology and questionable beauty standards.
Surround yourself with positive peeps
Being Body positive is only one aspect of building that all important happier self-image, but it is something that needs to be embraced. By working on yourself, you are inadvertently working on your business too, so a positive and healthier outlook can only deliver more success and progress the more you practice it. You are the biggest and most valuable investment you’ll ever make in your business. Learning how to be more body positive takes time and is approached on various levels that inevitably promotes self-acceptance and selfworth which grows into the confidence to be happier in your own skin and I’d like to share five ways in which you can start today.
1. Mind-Set – Tiny tweaks tailor transformations It’s not easy trying to change those negative beliefs you have about yourself that have been ingrained for so many years. Our experiences have shaped how we see our bodies from childhood to the current day and we all have different stories to tell. However, it’s never too late to put things in perspective and learn how to turn those thoughts around and build more positive neural pathways. I often recommend practicing visualisations, affirmations and taking time out to meditate or just quiet your mind but anything that promotes mindfulness and allows you to reconnect with what lies within has the power to build you up and shine a light on all that has gone unnoticed, forgotten, or put aside for too long. Little things like changing your passwords to positive mantras or strong self-descriptions are useful, or you could give yourself an authentic job title showing that you are an expert in what you do. Ensure it goes on your email signatures, social media bios and gets an airing at networking events. The more you see, hear, and say good things about yourself, the more you believe it and step into your power.
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Body
2. Self-Care Learning to like yourself a little more comes with the investment of taking time for yourself in activities promoting happiness and a sense of self development in any form. It’s not just about getting your nails done or having a facial, it’s about expanding your mind, using your body and experiencing new things. Swim that lake or join that salsa class. Sometimes it’s just about reaching out to other professionals for help or guidance and appreciating all that you can be, learn and do. Spending time looking after your needs outside of work is the most important thing you can ever give yourself.
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3. Body – Don’t let the scales define you. Your weight should not define the living, breathing human being within, you are so much more than that. You are skilled, talented, loved, and awesome in every way and a number on a scale or label in your dress does not mean that you aren’t any of those things. There is no happiness in diets, and it can take over your life and even have a detrimental effect on your mindset because they feed your ‘not good enough’ thoughts and make you wait to be happy, promising the holy grail at the end of it when you’ve lost the weight or got abs to die for.
Yes, a balanced and nutritious diet is important but the restriction, the control and the sadness surrounding what your weight is and what you should and should not eat, is not. Reconnecting with your body and looking at your relationship with food and eating is far more fruitful. Often, we have forgotten to listen to our natural hunger signals and have learned to eat emotionally which leads to poor eating habits and food choices.
4. Wardrobe – Wear your happy Whatever makes you feel good when you put it on has a superpower! Whether it’s the colour, the pattern, the fabric, the style or the positive memories associated with it, wear it with a smile and find more of the same. Your clothes help you express your personality, empower your confidence, and can show the world who you are and what you’re about, plus, they are powerful tools to wield in all arenas of life, and psychologically can provide so many benefits if worn in the right circumstances. If you don’t believe me, look up ‘enclothed cognition.’ Clothes can also be your friends and work with your body and proportions as well as hitting that ‘happy confidence’ button. Learning to find the right garments for you, your lifestyle needs, and your budget is something that can serve you forever and is an investment which keeps on giving. Embracing your distinctive features or assets, having a unique dress sense or happen to love anything with hearts on is being authentic and is part of you, so feel empowered by what makes you different.
5. Surround yourself with positive peeps Being in the right environment with like-minded people who support, inspire, and motivate you will always be better than hanging around mood hoovers and emotional vampires who suck out your soul. These people need to be kept at an arm’s length or at least relegated to less frequent interactions.
full of people who get you and have things in common. Follow people on social media who are positive role models, have the same ethos and who are great influencers and experts in their field. They have no doubt overcome great challenges you resonate with. You don’t need to envy them or compare yourself, just listen, watch, and learn from them because they often have just what you need to grow. On the flipside, have a social media cleanse from time to time to keep your feeds full of positivity, inspiration, and knowledge. So, there you have my five useful tips to get you started on the road to body positivity and a happier self-image and I hope you can implement at least one in your day to day. Just remember that you can learn to “Rock What You’ve Already Got.”
A positive and healthier outlook can only deliver more success
Therefore, seek out groups, forums, or events
Sara Marsden-Shreeve is an award-winning Image Consultant, Coach, NLP Practitioner, Positive Psychology Champion, Body Positive Advocate and the Co-Founder of the Wellbeing Inspiration Network, based in Derbyshire. Sara is also an avid blogger, frequently appears on BBC Radio and writes articles and guest posts for online magazines and collaborations. www.the-imagetree.co.uk
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Business
Becoming a Sidepreneur 22
Regular contributors, MaL!sh, have made some changes in their business situation, with Lilli now working for a corporation while still being involved with MaL!sh, she shares the challenges of being a Sidepreneur and gives us some tips on how to manage it.
Sidehustler, Sidebusiness, Sidepreneur(ship) There are many names for the opportunity to fulfil your dreams and create additional income. Interesting to know is that many people don´t know what a Sidepreneur is, and the association with hustling/hustle is often negative. The work reality of many looks like this: your workplace is not 100% secure and, in general, the way you work has changed: constant home office, no business trips, no trade fairs or highlights and you only meet your colleagues and customers virtually. Self-organisation and discipline are required. Times may be challenging, but at the same time, businesses have never had so many opportunities to reach customers all over the world at low cost. A start-up doesn’t have to be complicated or expensive, you can adapt the activities to your everyday life and your obligations. Building a side business can make you independent and worry free for the rest of your life. You have the luxury of time to see if your idea has market potential. If you become a full-time entrepreneur, it often feels like you have this one shot, and you succeed or you lose. Additionally, you feel deprived of the flexibility to experiment, try different things, and figure out the “right” business model before jumping in full time. The security of a regular, steady income and the possibility of realising yourself are not mutually exclusive but require some concrete steps and a good preparation. As we announced in the last issue, Lilli is back in the corporate world, and a Sidepreneur now. Here are her learnings on how to start, what challenges you might face and how to handle them.
Take your time every evening and write a To-Do List
If you decide to start a side business, you are taking a huge responsibility for you and your life. Of course, you are super excited, and you want to make it work. In the first weeks you are motivated and dedicated: after your day job you are spending your evening working on your side business. Do your best to treat your entrepreneurial job like a real job. It is, for all practical purposes, a very real job. It may not have its own corporate structure, a copy room, and a coffee maker, but it’s a real job nonetheless. I recommend that you set a regular schedule for working on it. Whether it’s nights, weekends, or lunch hours, create your schedule and stick to it. After a short while in the Sideprenuer game you will realise that: Time management is a huge challenge. For the time being this is a challenge for me. But time management can be learned, and you should be aware that it is the base for your success. Whether in the day job or your side hustle. Lilli’s top tip: have a calendar you like and work with it. It can be also an offline calendar where you can write and draw. Take your time every evening and write a To-Do List and set priorities for the next day (for your day job and your side business). Schedule fixed times for your business with exact topics f.e. Monday 7pm -9pm develop a social media strategy. Next thing to keep in mind and work on is your LinkedIn presence. Your LinkedIn profile is not only important for your employer or job search, but also a game changer for your side business.
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Business
Prepare yourself for a longer journey to success
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Lilli’s top tip: Invest time and money in a great LinkedIn profile and strategy. This will help you to create a presence and build a network. I am inviting you to check out our free tips for a convincing profile: www.malish.global/linkedin-free-pdf-en
No matter how many full-time, part-time and family commitments you have, you always need to carve out time for learning new things. Learning is not stealing from any employer, and it prepares you for your future in any career or business. Don’t wait for anyone to pay for courses or give you time off for training. It won’t happen.
Another important topic for your side business is the establishment of tools and systems which are tailored to you and help you to keep an eye on your side business, to organise yourself well and to successfully expand your hustle. How do you do this?
The advantage of quitting your day job early is that it removes all excuses, and all doubts from you and others – like “This new start-up is only a hobby”. There is nothing that drives an entrepreneur like being hungry, dependent on the outcome, and seeing rising debt. Without self-discipline, many aspiring entrepreneurs find that a single focus is the only way anything ever gets done. This was also our thought when we founded MaL!sh in 2018 and quit our jobs immediately. The concept of sidepreneurship was not known back then.
Lilli’s top tip: have a contact data base in place from the very beginning. As a start, even an excel file will do. Collect business cards in one place and make notes on them. Think about your customers – how and where do you want to approach them and what is your sales process. These are just a few points you should have in mind. In my first weeks as a Sidepreneur I am learning a lot about my priorities and way of working. To be able to manage my day is currently a little challenging but helps me as well to set the right targets for the day and week. Very important are realistic milestones which you have to take seriously. It is easy to make excuses when other priorities (from the day job) cause you to miss the milestones, but predictable results make your success. Talking about success, prepare yourself for a longer journey to success. Learn to look for small signs of success to keep you in the game.
Potential conflict of interest issues with a current employer should be explored openly
There is certainly additional risk associated with working a paying job during the day and working on your side business nights and weekends. First is the risk to your health and family life. If you lose these, all the business opportunities in the world don’t matter. Then there is the risk of upsetting your current employer by missing deadlines, reduced productivity, or even getting embroiled in a legal conflict of interest or for intellectual property ownership rights. It’s best to be up-front with your employer, with an honest commitment that your side hustle will not impact your commitments or results. Potential conflict of interest issues with a current employer should be explored openly, with the resulting agreement documented, to preclude the possibility that you might lose everything later as your business succeeds. On the positive side, your employer may like what you have in mind, and become your first customer, investor and biggest supporter. Also be aware of the handcuffed feeling you will undoubtedly experience: Massive limitation. Instead of making business, launching your website, or generating sales, you are limited in your actions. This is the reality of the part time entrepreneur. There is always more you can do in your business. But due to the limitations of time, there is only so much you will do. Important is that you are not blaming yourself for it. Be realistic and do not lose your enjoyment of it.
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Business If you envision a future where you can give up your day job and rely on your side hustle, it’s time to stop viewing it as a side hustle. It’s a business now - a growing, thriving, evolving business. And you? You’re the CEO. Reset your perspective, so you can pursue productivity with the kind of laserfocused determination your business deserves. How do you know when it’s time to consider becoming a full-time entrepreneur? A good rule of thumb is when the income from your parttime business is generating at least as much as your full-time job. Either that, or you have the real potential to earn that much if you are able to commit your full-time hours to the work.
Be realistic and do not lose your enjoyment of it.
What I am experiencing is the importance of a support system. Ups and downs are a part of the journey. When you feel you are down or desperate, ensure you have a support system around you. It may be family, friends, or people whom you collaborate with on a regular basis. Speaking to them and talking about your ideas and concerns will keep you motivated to go ahead. We are happy to have each other as sparring partners, for our MaL!sh business and Lilli´s day job. To be a sidepreneur there must be some sacrifices as well. As soon as you have decided on something, you may not be able to continue with everything you used to do. Like partying every evening or saying yes to all your friend’s invitations to hang out. One of the qualities you may have to adopt is to learn how to say no to several things without having to give an explanation. At the same time keeping yourself balanced and focused is the primary requirement. For this you need to allow time for your activities. Recharge yourself from time to time by taking breaks and indulge in hobbies. Go out for a movie or take up something that isn’t related to your business or office work. Once you are back at work, you will be fully charged to give it your best.
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Maike Benner and Lilli Rohde founders of MaL!sh Consulting, an international business consultancy and coaching company. Combining their experiences and strengths in people management, financials, tools and system, communication and leadership MaL!sh offers a variety of services for companies and individuals. www.compagneur.com - malish.global/about/malish-business/
Mindset & Emotion
Navigating the
Mess in the Middle 28
Teacher, Author and Entrepreneur, Lynda Holt, talks about ‘the mess in the middle’ the space between crisis and resolution and gives us three key things we can all do to navigate through it. Compassion and kindness are part of the human condition, they are essential to our collective and individual survival, yet we are consistently judgmental and critical of those we perceive as different. While the research and neuroscience around this may appear complex, the reason this happens is simple, it’s fear. Basically, our brain’s job is to keep us alive, therefore repetitive tasks and behaviours are its default. We unconsciously strive to make sense of ambiguity and remove uncertainty by drawing on perceptions, experiences and internal stories to guide how we show up and interact with the world. Neurologically, fear is designed to keep us safe, to give us pause before we run into mortal danger and to trigger an internal chemical response (the fight/flight response) which enables us to survive the threat. Think about an antelope grazing on the plain, it spots an approaching lion out of the corner of
its eye and quite literally runs for its life. After a while the lion finds something easier to chase, so once the antelope feels at a safe distance it stops running and goes back to grazing on the plain – fight/flight is resolved everything goes back to normal. That is exactly how humans were designed to work too, except we don’t – our big brains go over and over what happened, what might have happened, what others might think and so on and so on. Welcome to the mess in the middle, that seemingly infinite space between the acute crisis – being chased by a lion – and resolution – grazing on the plain. In humans, resolution happens when the uncertainty is resolved and, critically, you’ve made peace with what’s happened and your role in it. You get stuck in the middle when the acute crisis is over, but you are nowhere near resolution. The pandemic is an obvious example of this. Lives and businesses have been upended, and while our individual experiences may be different, few of us have been untouched. Many of us felt like we were juggling rather too many balls - health, work, home schooling, technology, finances and of course, mental wellbeing – it’s been a lot. Most of us have many other personal experiences of ‘crisis’ or sudden change, not always huge ones, but things which leave us questioning ourselves or our businesses, things that leave us feeling out of sorts, unsure of people we thought we could rely on, or uneasy in some way.
Most of the threat we humans experience is psychological
Depending on how you deal with stuff, you might be tempted to push through, just keep going or you might melt under the duvet and pretty much everything in between. Think about the antelope for a moment – if you keep running and running you become exhausted, if you stay under the duvet too long you probably get eaten by the lion. Somehow you need to find a way to return to grazing on the plain. Most of the threat we humans experience is psychological, the continual recycling and reanalysis of what was, what is or what might be. Unchecked this provides endless internal dialogue and emotional processing to navigate,
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Mindset & Emotion
creating enormous demand on your time and energy. Your ability to manage this and preserve your emotional wellbeing – or find your way back to the plain, is key to resolution. Preserving your emotional well-being is a bit like managing your bank balance – it fluctuates, sometimes it’s flush, sometimes it’s tight, either way you can’t ignore it. If you keep taking out without putting anything back, you will finish up overdrawn and eventually bankrupt. Think irritable, tired, unwell, burnt out and in poor mental health. Small deposits regularly create a reserve you can draw on in those times you need a bit extra. Understanding how to keep fluctuation of your emotional balance within a manageable range is key to survival, yet most of us take it for granted. Spend some time looking at what fills you up emotionally and what drains you, this might be people, activities, circumstances, or space - it’s personal to you. Once you understand what this is make sure you are putting enough into your wellbeing account to cope with outgoing demands.
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This takes compassion, kindness and resilience. Compassion is about connection, acceptance, and kindness. Humans are innately compassionate. Our brains are wired for connection and belonging, you get a neurochemical surge, or natural high, from acts of kindness and feeling connected. This builds your resilience and fills your emotional bank.
Why are we so judgemental? This also has to do with brain chemistry – we are designed to be like the antelope: to reside in rest and restore mode unless under immediate threat. Our adrenaline fuelled lifestyle – always accessible, information overwhelm and having never-ending internal dialogue – all lead to an over stimulated nervous system, existing in constant low-level fight/flight mode. This makes us more fearful, more anxious and even potentially more aggressive. Judgement plays an important, if unhelpful, role in reducing fear. If you can judge another as
different, they’ve a different background, made different choices, behave differently – you can distance yourself from the threat – they are not like me, so this won’t happen to me. In very simple terms this alters your brain chemistry. In the very short term this might calm your brain a little, in the longer term it usually gives you more to worry about, because once you’ve created that difference, that distance, you break connection and compassion thus reducing your helpful brain chemicals. This othering of people, or even whole communities, effectively turns them into a threat – and in extreme is the basis of many of the ‘isms’ we are collectively working so hard to heal.
concentrate on what you can do something about and resist the temptation to catastrophise. If you’ve enjoyed this and want to read more visit www.bravescene.com/inspirations or join us in www.facebook.com/groups/ BraveScene
So how do we fix it? There are three key things we can all do to navigate the mess in the middle.
1. Look after our own emotional bank balance – aim to put in more than you take out. Know what fills your wellbeing account and make small deposits every day. Sleep well, eat well and exercise enough to take care of yourself. Know your limits and step back when you need to. You might over stretch occasionally, especially during a crisis, but don’t do it all of the time. 2. Pay attention, both to yourself and to those around you – explore your attitudes, judgements and stories. Seek to connect and not judge by listening and understanding other’s perspectives. This builds empathy, reduces misunderstanding and is good for your neurochemistry. In short be kind. 3. Contribute where you can – share, help, engage – you don’t have to fix everything, just being of service gives you a dopamine hit which is great for your emotional bank balance. Each of these helps to build your resilience and keep your emotional bank balance healthy. Finally, as you navigate the mess in the middle, choose where to put your emotional energy,
Preserving your emotional well-being is a bit like managing your bank balance
Lynda Holt MA, RN, FRSA, CPBP, FInstLM, is a Teacher, Author and Entrepreneur , CEO of Health Service 360/Brave Scene. Her mission is to heal inertia, judgement and fear, enabling people to find their own courage, trade in hope and explore what’s possible. For 18 years she has led business owners and experts towards making the contribution they are here to make.
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Interview
Bisila Bokoko Philanthropy has been a calling
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We are very excited in this issue to feature the phenomenal businesswoman, Bisila Bokoko, renowned for taking companies from local to global, here she tells us her story of becoming an entrepreneur and the joy she gets from her philanthropy.
Who is Bisila Bokoko? Well I believe that I am still a little girl because I continue to have this passion to do everything, and I am very curious about everything. When you have the power to connect to your inner child it gives you the ability to keep going forward in a great state of joy. I would also say, I am a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a wife… I am many things but in essence, this is who I am, a woman in progress.
What made you become an entrepreneur? That’s a long story, I had no reference regarding how to become a women entrepreneur at all. My mother was a nurse and always had a job, she knew that she needed to be there at certain times, and she would have that job for life. I remember when I attended her retirement party a few years ago I said to myself Wow I admire her because: She pursued her dreams, the only thing she wanted to be was a nurse and she has done it. She was radiant, very happy and satisfied. She wanted that kind of safety where you got a salary every month. My dad was an entrepreneur, but I always wanted the level of safety my mum had. When I finished college, I said to myself I want to become a Civil Servant. This was something which had crossed my mind because we were immigrants, my parents in Spain, and then me in the United Stated, so I really wanted this level of safety. Entrepreneurship was not in my radar at all. I was Executive Director of the Spanish US Chamber of Commerce, it was a kind of safe job, in a way I could have made an easy transition to any other company because it had a big network, so I felt safe. But I got fired under very difficult circumstances which I had provoked myself and that reality provided a change of direction. I decided, I didn’t want to be fired again. I had deserved to be fired, I had been a rebel, doing what I wanted to do and not following the rules. However, I realised the only way to do things the way I wanted to do them, was by becoming an
entrepreneur. I was afraid then to do it and if I am honest, I am still afraid today, I still don’t feel fully comfortable about it. Every month is like a rollercoaster, but I have learned to live with that uncertainty, it has become part of my life, and at the end of the day, when you have a passion, you have to follow it.
Who did you surround yourself with to give you the tools to become who you are today? Three years before I got fired everyone in my network was complaining about their bosses, the atmosphere they worked in and their jobs. People would come to me to ask if I had any jobs and I would say, I’m not the labour office, but I always seemed to be getting people coming to me. Eventually I realised it was me who was attracting these conversations. Once I had decided to go my own way, the people who turned up in my life were entrepreneurs. They were super excited about their projects and these people become my mentors. I could not single out one person, many helped me. One friend inspired me by how she put everything together, another had a social conscience and wanted to do good. These people were my support system. I also read a lot, and these books helped me walk my path, I believe it was a mixture of my network and friends, which inspired me.
What is your advice to someone starting out? You have to adopt the persona you want to become at the beginning. It may feel uncomfortable, as if you are an imposter, that you need to study more, do more, be more, but it isn’t like that. You have to believe in yourself that you can achieve your goals and become successful. Maybe you have an important day, a meeting with investors or directors and you feel inside you’re not ready yet, don’t! You have to own it and with practice you will learn you can do it. But to begin with you may have to fake it, until your confidence grows, and you become the person you know you could be.
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Interview
Everyone goes through this process, and we need to learn to be more compassionate with ourselves and not feel as if we are cheating, it is just the procedure we need to go through. We learn by doing, we will make mistakes at the beginning, and we will learn from them. I remember being invited to a conference and feeling I wasn’t ready, I felt sick. Then I said to myself. Stop this! Thinking like this will only bring negative thoughts into your life and you will not grow from it. You may be at the beginning, but the universe has given you the opportunity to be at this forum, a chance to start training, so train! And you keep doing it until one day, it becomes natural, and you feel comfortable with your life, because you earned it. Women should be more compassionate to ourselves. We need to stop comparing ourselves to others, maybe thinking another woman is getting ahead and we will never catch up. We must stop doing that. We all have our own rhythm; our own pace and we need to realise that. It might take three years or five years, it doesn’t matter. You need to love yourself and celebrate every step it takes to get there.
These days you are a businesswomen, was it easy to learn to delegate? Actually I think I got good training at the Chamber of Commerce because I had already been working with a team. Delegation is all about trust. You have to surround yourself with the best people. I recognise there are many things I don’t know and don’t need to know. So often time is wasted trying to do something you are not good at. So rather than do that, get someone else who is good at it, to do it! My job is to make sure deadlines are accomplished; the best type of leadership is where people are left to achieve the goals in their own way. As long as the deadlines are achieved, then everyone is happy, doing what they love to the best of their ability. The keyword is trust! Not interfering with people’s creativity and innovation. I like to surround myself with a diverse group of people, it allows me to see different perspectives. The important thing is to listen and appreciate other people’s ideas.
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How do you take care of your mindset , body and spiritual being? For may years I have followed my rituals and routines. Meditation is part of my daily routine. First thing in the morning, I take 20 minutes to myself, before I check my phone, so I can concentrate on being centred. Some entrepreneurs work differently and are connected to their phones at all times. I will not do that. My mornings are sacred and are dedicated to myself and being centred. Every morning and evening I take some time for writing and journaling. My journal is divided into different categories. One for my affirmations, one for feelings or emotions and one for my wishes, the things I want to accomplish and one for notes of gratitude. I usually wake at 5am, this is time for my myself and my family. I take a walk for an hour, or do Pilates or yoga. Sometimes I have breakfast in my pyjamas which I enjoy too - I love it at the weekend with the whole family and sometimes during the week with my husband. Normally I start my day at 09:00 or 09:30 am. I finish about 3pm when I have my meal . Before I was spending all my time being busy. These days I like to focus for four hours and then enjoy my day . I try to arrange my agenda so the most difficult things are solved between Monday and Wednesday, then on Thursday and Friday I can relax, maybe do some interviews, like this one! Or meetings which don’t take up too much of my energy, or start new projects. On Friday’s at 3pm, I am finished, and it is time for my family and to enjoy life. Maybe a lady’s lunch which I enjoy, I love connecting with people who are creating amazing work for the world, I love that kind of inspiration. I do try to eat as healthy as I can (laughing) even though I love sweets.
How have you managed the Covid situation in your company? Well the first month was shocking to me, I saw my finances going down and disappearing . Before everything started, I had a busy month going on
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Interview tour with my conferences abroad, then I came back to New York and the news said we would be in lockdown. I decided to stop worrying and start doing something about it So I did these two things: Number one: I decided if I had all this time, I was going to use it to study and prepare myself. I started working with some different coaches. I got three different ones and mentors. I am a coach myself, but I decided to be a student this time. It was incredible, I used that time to make a better version of myself. I used that time to see and change, to shift things around, let go of other things, let go of control and perfectionism. A lot of these things you are not completely aware of but then you stop and feel and have the moment for yourself you start seeing them. I took time to heal myself. And number two: I said to myself, well if I cannot do conferences, I will create a YouTube channel and learn. So I started figuring out how to be useful to others. A great advantage of this time was to spend more time with my family, I love cooking African food or Spanish food, so everyone was delighted. It was a good time, but of course in other ways it was a difficult time for a company. In the end we made the best of it, and I am sure that this is what you have to do in life . You cannot change the circumstances, but you can change your attitude.
What was the inspiration behind your first non-profit organization?
This trip was magical because as I was travelling and looking at the situation. Many magical thing happened; I meet a magical person who was the chief of Kokofu a village next to Kumasi. To make a long story short he proposed for me to be the Queen of that town. I just heard the world Queen and I said yes but then when my ego calmed down, I asked what he wanted me to do. How can I serve. He said to me, think about it and call me in three days… So during those three days I was thinking, and a thought came to my mind. I thought, well, I know Africa because of books. When I was a little girl, my parents gave me African books and made me read them and learn everything about Africa because they thought this was the best way I could stay connected with our roots. So after those three days I was thinking they could get connections with the other continents through books. That is how the library was born, when Bisila Bokoko African Literacy Project was born…It was like a calling. The moment I did it I also saw the gift it brought me. After a year of working towards it we opened the first library and I went with a team of friends and people from New York, and I saw and felt the reaction of the locals, the children and everyone together cheering and sharing the happiness. I felt so empowered, full of energy, happy. That was when I realised that being a philanthropist is not an act of generosity. it is selfishness [and here she started laughing] because you feel so good by helping others that you want to do it again and again. It is amazing, the power of giving. So we kept going, more libraries: Uganda, Zimbabwe, Kenya, Guinea Equatorial, Nigeria - different places and it has been such a beautiful journey.
I don’t think it was an inspiration, I think of it as more of a calling. I had not considered being a philanthropist. It had not been in my plans. I had only considered being an entrepreneur and businessperson to make money. But something must have shifted in me. The first time I went to Africa I was 35 and it was an incredible journey. First of all for the first time in my life everyone looked like me…everyone is black. I got to the airport, and I was WOWed I said to myself I am in AFRICA.
Please tell us about the Pikolino project?
I grew up in Valencia in Spain and a lot of my work has been in Madrid, then I moved to New York which is very diverse. I had not connected with my African roots until I was in Ghana for the first time.
Pikolino is a company based in Elche, Alicante. I remember it was 2005 when she spoke about it, so I have been a part of it since then. We work together creating sustainable and conscious tourism in Masai Mara, we organise beautiful
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Wow that was one of the first projects I was involved with as an entrepreneur, and is very deep rooted in my heart. I actually loved it because the engineer of this project was Rosa Escandel, she is a really good friend of mine and she is the one who had the great idea to match the Masai people with Pikolino .
safaris and we also support the schools through volunteering. Doctors come and donate their time too. I work very closely with the Masai women to help empower them. The project started in 2011 with Pikolino and developed into something much bigger with many corporations getting involved. It is a magical place where we have inspired children to expand their ideas and exchange thoughts.
Tell us about your kids and their education I have given my children space to grow up. I grew up in a house where no one left me alone and my teenage years were a nightmare. I didn’t want them to have the same experience. As a child I would follow the crowd and I wanted to fit in, so I didn’t really know who I was. My kids are my teachers, they know who they are. I remember one Halloween I asked my daughter what she wanted to wear, she said she would go as a homeless person. She loves video games, which I hate. She knows what she wants and as a rebel, she is wiser. I given her space and she has amazed me with the person she has become. As a parent, we need to put trust in our children.
in our mind. We should think about how to be a better person, we always focus on how to make business better, but everything starts from within. So in order to be great in business you have to do your inner work first. If you want to give your best in business, first you have to be the best human being you could be. So my advice would be to work on your personal development . I remember when I started out as a businesswoman and the business was not right because I was not aligned. You have to align the mind and the heart in order to be great and to understand that behind your fears are opportunities. Be vulnerable, feel frustrated if you have to, being strong means that sometimes you admit that you are sad, embrace your emotions .
It is amazing, the power of giving
I wanted to be in show business and my father wanted me to be a lawyer, but I didn’t want that. We have this limited belief that there is only one way to make money, but there are many ways to make money. And we need to learn to raise children by being happy parents.
What is your next milestone? We want to launch a campaign to go to Africa to go to Masai Mara and gather mindful leaders and bring Conscious Tourism to Africa. The project for next year is to continue lectures about diversity which is important for companies because they could work better. Inclusive leadership is the most important tasks for the next year. I will be doing Latin-American next year as well. Women need inspiration to know they can do it too. Venezuela is also a country that I would love to add to the countries we would like to support I want it to be part of my work .
What is your best piece of business advice? The first thing to realise is that most limits are
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Health
Hitting the
Reset Button
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Award-winning health coach and international speaker, Jules Francis, explains replacing old, disempowering beliefs with new empowering beliefs helps us deal with the root of the problem which is holding us back. When was the last time you stopped what you were doing and literally pressed reset on your life? Left an unhappy relationship, ended an unfulfilling job, moved from a house that didn’t feel like a home? Doesn’t it feel great when you take that leap of faith and throw yourself into the unknown! Or does it fill you with fear? We’ve all been there – that place when too many things just get out of hand. Work can pile up, relationships take a back seat, meal plans go out the window and suddenly its seems like you’ve missed the memo that said stop and breathe. I’m Jules Francis and I typically work with career driven women who tend to overindulge in food they know is bad for them but do it anyway. When I work alongside my clients we usually dig into the roots of the issue with food and back to the point it first started or in some cases who it was mirrored on. What we discover every time is it’s never really about food. You see food is a symptom of the larger picture – a sign that says something isn’t quite right. But it’s not actually food that is the real root of the problem. Too often people overeat or under eat or eat food that gives them physical discomfort, but they still choose it. They then get to a certain pain point and in desperation go on another diet, search for a nutritionist or pick up another diet book because they presume the problem is with food.
Does this sound at all familiar? The thing is the issue may not be with food at all – it may be with their beliefs, their mindset, or their perspective on certain situations.
But it doesn’t need to be that way. I take my clients on a deep journey of selfdiscovery to shift their mindset and say goodbye to limiting beliefs so they can feel free with food, find joy in eating and have confidence in their bodies. People don’t tend to listen to advice on what they should eat if they have limited beliefs running the show around deserving or punishment or control for example so it’s best to work with this first. One of my clients, a 45-year-old lawyer from London was always on a diet. She came to see me after she had finally reached the conclusion that diets just don’t work. After spending endless evenings home alone, drinking or eating junk dinners, she knew there was something bigger that needed resolving. We worked together for nine months and in that time, her anxiety went away, her low moods lifted, her clothes started to fit and her confidence came back. She even left her job that we discovered was draining her and found something more fulfilling where she now had enough confidence to walk into. I spoke with her just the other day and I’m delighted to say she sounded on top form.
Doesn’t it feel great when you take that leap of faith
Can you see by focusing on food as the problem means the main issue doesn’t get resolved? They still may lack joy in their lives or wake up feeling bored or go to bed feeling lonely and all of this stays the same when the focus is diverted to food.
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Health
What was it that really shifted for this lady you may be wondering? We worked on all areas of her life before we even got to the subject of food. You see looking first at food means missing all the foundations of the issue. It’s like attempting to add a chimney to a roof when the house hasn’t been built yet. We started instead by replacing her limiting beliefs with empowering beliefs. The first step in replacing old, disempowering beliefs with new, empowering beliefs is to understand the five places our beliefs come from
If you are ready to find freedom in your relationship with food, change your limited beliefs, or hit the reset button on your life, let’s talk and find the best way forward for you. Follow this link to book in a free 20-minute call www.julesfrancis.as.me/exploratory-call or download my free masterclass on the 5 steps to transforming your relationship with food without restricting what you eat. www. julesfrancis.com/5stepmasterclass/
1. Environment
Free yourself from the story that you are a product of your environment. While circumstances may be difficult at times, each of us has the power to choose what you believe in order to step into your full potential.
2. Events
These could be positive or negative. The day you got married. The birth of your child. That big promotion. The death of a loved one. Events impact our lives profoundly causing us to form beliefs, often unconsciously, which affect our entire worldview.
3. Knowledge
Knowledge is not power. Knowledge is potential power. By applying what you know and not just knowing it, you can change your limiting beliefs. When you learn from the best and model them, you can create the beliefs that will encourage you to succeed.
Free yourself from the story that you are a product of your environment
4. Past Results
We all create beliefs around the results of past achievements or failures. But past results do not equal future results. Keep your positive results close in mind so you can always achieve what you set out to do.
5. Future Vision
Create a compelling future for yourself and imagine the way you will feel if that is your future. When it’s anchored in your body, stand up and celebrate!
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Jules Francis has helped hundreds of people to understand the underlying causes of why they have unhealthy eating behaviours. With three decades of experience, Jules has the insight to see what underpins low confidence and how people choose compensating behaviours to deal with it. She is an award-winning health coach, international speaker and co-author of a book on Confidence.
Mindset & Emotion
Earth spins. So do we.
42
Entrepreneur, business consultant and writer, Veronica George, looks at how we can learn lessons from Mother Earth about controlling chaos and bringing order into our lives by being aware of our own ecosystems, both personal and in business. “Everything in the universe is within you. Ask all from yourself.” Rumi The Earth spins at a speed of 1,700km per hour around its axis. This is a mind-boggling speed and what is even more mind-blowing, is that everything on Earth is along for the ride, at the same speed. Yet instead of the expected chaos we should be experiencing, everything is held together in its place. We cannot see or feel this momentum. Why? Because our planet operates on two fundamental principles:
Playing multiple roles can cause our minds to spin
Chaos breeds and the inevitability of this chaos continues to ring true throughout our being.
2. Earth keeps its speed constant while making
So how do we control the chaos and bring order into our lives? How do we hold everything together in its place? Just like Earth, playing multiple roles can cause our minds to spin. The question is, must we spin out of control? Must we believe that for us to achieve all our personal and entrepreneurial goals, we must dwell in this chaos? No. What we need to do is borrow from the example set by our mothership.
These two principles (amongst others) are the mechanisms by which the chaos that should be is controlled and order maintained on our planet and its ecosystem.
Firstly, let’s learn from gravity. Imagine that Earth is a person. Earth became aware that she was spinning and to keep all her inhabitants safe, to control the chaos of them flying off into space, she decided to create a mechanism at her core to keep everything tethered to her.
1.
Earth relies on gravity to maintain an attraction between all objects of mass drawing them toward its centre and keeping them from flying off into space.
sure that you and everything else on it is spinning along with it at the same speed.
As female entrepreneurs, we suffer greatly from the yoke of chaos. This chaos is often brought about by the pressure we face from society’s expectations of our performance in both our personal and entrepreneurial ventures. We are expected to put on an Oscar-worthy execution of our roles as mothers, wives, sisters and CEOs. Failure in any of these capacities is not met with empathy. It is instead met with the narrative of us needing to stick to the traditional roles that someone, somewhere prescribed to us. Failure also becomes a testament to our inability to challenge the status quo effectively despite the many examples of women on the planet who juggle all their roles with precision. Knowing this then drives us to pursue perfection in everything we do just to prove a point even when we know this pursuit, may lead to our own demise.
Lesson: Awareness Are you aware of what is making you spin out of control? Is it your business? As entrepreneurs, we feel obligated to be IN our business day and night. We are engulfed in the day to day to a point where we have no time to take stock on whether we are still aligned to our vision, or even to visualise the future of our venture. What happens next is a loss of control, chaos. We become the dog constantly chasing the bone, instead of the lion, waiting to pounce on its prey. Is it your personal life? Do your family and friends support your vision? When was the last time you reminded them of why you missed the dinner
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Mindset & Emotion
Let your motion be ecstatic not chaotic
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date last week or why you will have to leave early on thanksgiving? Have you checked if they are still aligned and okay for you to continue doing so or are you assuming they are? What happens if they are not? Chaos. We must constantly take time to cultivate an awareness of where our ecosystem, both personal and in business, lies in view of our vision. The reason for this is to make sure everything is working for us and not against us. When things are working against us, then chaos breeds. We can only do this by choosing to unplug and meditate on what drives our core being, our WHY, and how we can align everyone, and everything involved to it. Only then can we create the right mechanisms required to keep the ecosystem tethered to us and control any chaos that would have it flying off into space. Secondly, let’s pay attention to Earth’s speed. Earth discovered that by making sure everything on her was moving at the same speed as she was, spinning at the same pace, she could keep all her inhabitants attached to her surface.
Lesson: Keep your speed constant Falling behind in anything is never pretty. The result is always a maddened rush to catchup to our desired outcomes. Everyone falls prey to procrastination. However, we must choose to make the conscious intention of maintaining a constant speed towards achieving our personal and business goals. We must also make sure that our ecosystem is operating at the same speed to prevent anyone or anything from either misaligning to the vision or flying completely out of our scope. Setting the intention to keep our speed constant cannot be realised without applying our will power. Will is fundamental to the achievement of any goals. When you set will to choice and intention, you obtain the power to realise your vision. Imagine being in a car moving at a constant speed of 100 miles per hour. Its motion and yours get aligned to the point where you become oblivious of your movement. What happens if the driver suddenly brakes? Chaos erupts. You
may even start yelling at the driver for yanking you close to smashing your forehead on the dashboard. If Earth was to suddenly change its speed without our awareness, we would all feel it and demand an explanation or even seek to abandon the planet completely (if we could). The same principle applies to our ecosystem. If we changed pace abruptly, those within it would demand an explanation or stop being a part of it. Systems we have put in place, would cease to provide us with the benefits they normally would, for their purpose would have become distorted. Earth makes sure she completes a full rotation within 24 hours. Therefore, she must maintain a constant speed to achieve this feat without fail. This intention drives our orientation of when day and night come. Order is maintained across the planet. We must also keep our speed constant to provide orientation to our ecosystem. If you told your family to bear with your absence for only a year as you set up your business, what would happen if you took five years? As for your employees, did you tell them they would receive full salaries after two years when sales increased by 80%? What would happen if this were to not materialise? We must apply will to our vision to keep the speed of pursuing and materialising it constant. This will provide the scope for our ecosystem to operate in maintaining control and order even where chaos is expected. “You are the universe in ecstatic motion.” Rumi. Let your motion be ecstatic not chaotic.
We must apply will to our vision
Veronica George is an entrepreneur, business consultant and writer focused on driving innovation on the African continent. Starting her career as an Executive Assistant allowed her to observe the importance of creating processes and systems in businesses that allow entrepreneurs and C-Suite executives to focus on working ON their businesses instead of IN their businesses. Executive Assist Limited. veronica@executiveassistafrica.com
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Fit Features
The Changing Face of EDUCATION
46
Innovation and Change Leader, Founder and Writer, Zeynep Dereli, introduces our readers to a new form of teaching, one where students from any country or any background will have access to the best education available. The most important output of digital transformation is the ‘intelligence revolution’ we live in, in the ‘Science and Digital Technology era’. In the education system, which will raise the workforce profile envisaged by this digital-based new economic model and social structuring, it is important to have the digital skill level and skills that will realise digital transformation with analytical thinking, questioning and problem solving. The education reform efforts we’ve implemented over the years focus heavily on standardising content and curricula, holding teachers and schools accountable for students’ performance, and getting students into college. Basically, a good education should be either interesting or useful or even both. If you have received a good education, you must remember what you have learned. However, just before our students enter college, they forget about 60% of what they learned in high school. In the light of technological developments, we need an education system encouraging people to be fully human. In fact, machines will push us to be more conscious, think more critically, and express ourselves in a more sophisticated way. We will see the greening of everything that means being human with artificial intelligence in education. Artificial intelligence is changing the definition of intelligence, not the way people think and interact. IQ was once considered the most effective way to measure people’s ability to think effectively and acquire knowledge. However, this is changing rapidly. Now that machines will have IQ, other social competencies which were previously considered unimportant are now gaining importance. These can be defined as curiosity intelligence, emotional intelligence, artistic intelligence, personal intelligence, digital intelligence, moral intelligence, spiritual intelligence and collective intelligence.
student as much as the teacher. There is a serious injustice in education, as the best teachers are concentrated in the richest countries and in the richest cities in those countries. However, with artificial intelligence, there will soon be private teacher robots to teach every student on every subject in front of their own screens. Currently, students will be trained in classes of 20 or 40, with personalised virtual tutor support without any teachers. In developing countries, the best teacher in every subject will teach. If this opportunity in education is used correctly, especially in developing countries with a large young population such as Turkey, very welleducated generations will be raised. With artificial intelligence, we will increase our human skills, to which we have not given much importance until now, and we will have a new education model allowing the emergence and development of individual competencies. In order to keep up with these changes, I would like to draw attention to the fact that we need to have the skills of critical thinking, teamwork, finding the right information, solving difficult problems, creative thinking and developing our emotional intelligence. It is possible to develop these skills, but with the right training methods.
The best teachers are concentrated in the richest countries
In the current global education system, there is no other factor affecting the success of the
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Fit Features
Adults wish we had learned skills in school to help them in life. Unfortunately, they did not learn the competencies they needed during their careers such as tax, justice system, investment, health, money management, time management, team management at school. As a result of the enforced online education due to Covid-19 school shutdowns, the inertia and conservatism against technology in the education sector is minimised and there will be no turning back. Many schools will have to provide remote learning solutions as an alternative or complementary to their existing solutions. This creates a window of opportunity to transition the education industry to a cleaner and circular economy by optimising the mobility of students, teachers along with utilisation of schools and city resources. The ‘new normal’ education ecosystem will increase the utilisation of Learning Management Systems (LMS) as their main software tool to provide remote learning. In the digital age the two worlds of technical and soft skills need to meet. Tech is changing demands. E-learning can serve as ‘equaliser’ and increase efficiency and sustainability. The world is changing rapidly. As educators we need to reevaluate the added value of degrees. A degree does not guarantee employability, and many educational institutions are recognising this. In response, they are starting to unbundle learning into credentials which demonstrate one’s ability to conquer well-defined skills and competencies. So instead of a traditional degree, they offer professional diplomas. TINK offers the special curriculum it developed to its students in a unique educational environment, with its technology infrastructure. We developed a school management software called TinkSmart, that is used by Technology and Humanity Colleges in all of its school management processes including enrolment, student and parent data, class and teacher schedules, online exams, inventory management etc. Before entering the classes, we convey the summary, main ideas and important points of the lessons to the students via TinkSmart. Thus, students come to the lessons prepared and use the lesson hours to discuss and generate ideas.
T Diploma (TD) program is the first diploma program working with any national curriculum and allows schools to prepare their students for the digital age through a hybrid model. Students collect credits to receive a TD and schools can choose the ratio of in class and online courses. TD will be offered via a portal that will allow students to self-pace their learning, collaborate with peers across the world and receive accreditation and college credits. TD schools will combine the best aspects of online learning and the best aspects of traditional classes for an all-inclusive learning experience. Technologyenhanced learning, with properly targeted audience-oriented or customised teaching and learning methodologies, can provide affordable, engaging, and personalised learning. T Diploma, either in a stand-alone format or blended with other types of instruction and training, can efficiently close the knowledge and skills gap if combined with innovative pedagogy (teaching, learning and assessment). We want T Diploma to be the leading hybrid K-12 diploma program for the digital age. Its unique content, school and student personalisation options and AI based learning pathway management will make quality education affordable and accessible.
Providing affordable, engaging, and personalised learning
Zeynep Dereli is the founder & CEO of Tink, Technology and Humanity
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Colleges. Before founding Tink, Zeynep held managerial positions at companies and institutions such as Shell, Atlantic Council and APCO. She has a BA from Princeton University and MA from SOAS, the University of London. She’s a public speaker and writer, also serves on the boards of TUBISAD, and WTech.
CREATIVELY STRATEGIC. RUTHLESSLY FLEXIBLE. SMOOTHLEY EFFICIENT
We are dedicated to your success. To look beyond what is right in front of you. To carving out a path that, while ambitious, guides you and pushes you and your business to become more, to become what you are destined for.
www.mas-connections.com
SERVICES GAP ANALYSIS & METHOD [r] CHANGE MANAGEMENT
ETHICAL PERSUASSION EXCELLENCE & ECOMMERCE
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info@mas-connections.com
Spirituality
The Power of
Intention
50
Specialist in Intercultural Communication in Spain and Latin America, Prof. Dr. Irmela Neu, looks at how discovering the power of intention can become a journey full of adventures and gives us some exercises to help us. We all know that “positive thinking“ has a tremendous effect upon our wellbeing – even more if we combine it with “positive emotions“. The energy which comes from our heart is much more powerful than our thoughts. We need the right combination from both. Sometimes, when we like something very much, we are overexcited and enthusiastic. It may inspire us and give motivation to initiate or to continue a project. Enthusiasm can also irradiate from nature – the colours, smells, beauty – as it touches our souls. The more we are open minded to this, we feel enlightened. It is important to mention that stress cuts us from this source of regeneration and feeling of connexion. Of course, for our daily life we also need our mind to direct enthusiasm in the direction we want. It is like a fire: it needs careful handling, otherwise it would burn too much or too little – with the possible dramatic consequence of burn-out on one hand and lethargy on the other hand – or both at the same time. Our inner fire is a precious resource which asks us to be managed in a sustainable way. “Intention“ is much more than “positive emotions“. It refers to the knowledge of adjusting mind, soul and emotions. What comes first? Does a thought – the mind – invoke emotions, or do emotions trigger our mind? It is the often-repeated question of what was first: the egg or the chicken?
Exercise:
Remember a very touching event, whatever it is: with children, friends, or family, in nature etc. Close your eyes, cross your hands on your heart, breathe deeply in and out, move softly. Let the feeling of enthusiasm overwhelm you. After a certain time, you will feel that your heart, all the cells of your body become wider, they warm up. Without doubt, a smile will appear on your face, your body language will express wellbeing. This reaction comes automatically as a result of an
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Spirituality
immersion in this activity. We can also ask our inner self, our heart which procures us with a good feeling; our mind diving into the ocean of imagination creating happiness. The better we let reality become what we imagine, the greater we feel. As there is a danger of getting lost in the empire of dreams, we establish a strong dialogue between “imagination“ and “reality“. How can we create a harmony between reality and imagination? The answer is clear: by managing our intention. The word “intention“ comes from the Latin language and describes an inner process. In our body and mind, we can distinguish three centres: the vital one, our “belly“, the heart and the mind. Sometimes, the vital centre seduces us to unfiltered, spontaneous reactions; in principle, it is a positive quality, but it becomes negative, when we are dominated by destructive impulses, emotions or basic instincts like anger, fear, hate etc. The consequences may be worthier than the reason of our uncontrolled reaction. Our heart – the second centre – loves all that is connected to love. Our third centre, the mind, is like an institution: it selects, gives ideas, communicates what comes from inside and outside. On one hand, our mind is highly receptible of all the emotions, sensations, manipulations coming from inside and outside. On the other hand, it is able to create a distance, to reflect and to analyse. The three centres are connected by a flow we can imagine and feel as the number 8. The combination of mind and emotions, of the three energetical centres leads us to the very centre of our intention. How to develop its power?
Our inner fire is a precious resource
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To start, please check the five questions:
1. Can you feel the reactions of your body in relationship with emotions and thoughts? 2. Does one of the three life centres act separately creating blockages? (Impulses, old patterns, blockages, unreflected reactions, stress)?
3. Are you open-minded for your intuition? 4. Do you have some experiences regarding
your creativity to find “win-win“ solutions?
5. Can you feel the flow of the number 8
between the three centres?
The three centres function perfectly as long as they are in flow. If we only react from our vital centre, we may feel in the hands of unreflected impulses; they become balanced by the wisdom of our heart and enriched by the mind activities. We can imagine the flow between the three centres as a river filled with fresh water, full of fresh energy. Furthermore, you will notice the richness of your balanced intuition as a wonderful source of answers and questions. It creates the harmony which enables us to become creative, receptive for new ideas, solutions and outcomes. Let‘s focus and feel fully the flow in form of the number 8 and practice the following exercise: Cross your arms and hands at the level of your heart. Move a circle above inhaling and below exhaling. Bound your knees smoothly as part of the movement, and let the whole body move in a natural way. Practice this exercise regularly. Then, use your imagination to intensify the body movement. Even if you don‘t have the opportunity to exercise physically, do it with your inner imagination. The power of intentions comes from the strength to focus our energetical 8. We can direct it to a concrete goal, a wish, a project, a vision. Therefore, we need a clearing process of what is worthy of being focussed by my/our intention.
process, give yourself enough time, space and patience. You may find your own technique and enjoy mind mapping, painting….etc. Check if your imagination is solid enough, positive, feasible and reachable. In order that your imagination becomes the power of intention, let‘s check something very important: does it come from a certain egoism “I want to be the greatest“ or is my intention in harmony with let‘s say spiritual values: • • •
to give and to receive must be balanced knowing and feeling that to give is an inner source of joy. to share with empathy creates a loving community. to be humble, honouring what life offers us as opportunities; life wants us to accept all that happens in our life unconditionally as part of life in order to grow and to become a grateful member of humankind.
Just discover the power of intention as a journey full of adventures.
The power of intentions comes from the strength to focus our energetical 8
Exercise:
After completing the earlier exercise with the 8, write down what you really want, desire, wish, hope. As our brain does not understand a “no“, please find positive words. Welcome this clearing
Prof. Dr. Irmela Neu, from the University of Applied Sciences, Munich/ Germany, specialised in Intercultural Communication in Spain and Latin America and has been published in this field. She has worked with UNESCO in the field of Education. She focuses on seminars in Mindful Communication and in body-based teachings to open our heart, combined with Mindful Communication. Her message: Life is lovely. www.Irmela-neu.de
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Mindset & Emotion
New Mindset
New Results
Mindset and Results Coach, Sam Mills, explains the importance of having a positive mindset and how it can affect every aspect of our life and gives our readers some tips on how to change your mindset to achieve your goals. What do successful people all have in common? They don’t allow challenges and setbacks to hold them back; instead they use them as opportunities to learn and propel themselves forward. In other words they have a positive mindset which makes them resilient and determined. Your mindset filters how you see the world and affects everything you say and do, having an amazing impact on your entire life. Your mindset creates hope and hopelessness, success and failure and enables you to live at peace or war with circumstances beyond your control. It is the software your brain uses to create attitude,
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experience and achievement. Your mindset is critical, impacting whether you are positive or negative and can even be an indicator of how successful you will be or how much money you will earn in your career. The challenge is that our brains are built for worry and caution. It is easier and more natural to think negatively than positively, this worked well and is how we survived as hunter gatherers living in a world with sabre-toothed tigers and the like. Despite the world having moved on, our brains continue to try to protect us and are still programmed to look for the problems. Changing this will change the results you achieve. Our mindset is a result of our beliefs which affect our attitudes and actions, changing our beliefs starts the process of changing our mindset. There are many different mindsets and beliefs
that either hold us back or propel us forward, for example: • • • •
Victim Mindset – It always happens to me, the world is against me Agile Mindset – embrace and see the opportunity in change Perfectionist Mindset – causes procrastination, giving up or never getting started Dreamer Mindset – visionary, believes anything is possible
Carol Dweck wrote about Fixed and Growth Mindsets in her book Mindset: How we can learn to fulfil our potential. People with Fixed Mindsets believe their abilities and opportunities are limited. Growth Mindset people see limitless potential and any setback as a learning opportunity. Research has shown that those with a result focused, growth mindset keep the end result in mind and stay positive when setbacks occur, they also tend to make more money and are happier than those who choose to limit themselves. Those with a fixed mindset make excuses for setbacks instead of learning from mistakes and blame others for not making progress. Observing and being aware of your mindset is the first step to making change: •
•
• •
When you experience something difficult and painful, do you bounce back and continue your journey or do you dwell on it and let it affect your mood? How do you start your day? Do you get on with your workout or avoid it? Do you wake feeling grateful or imagining everything that can go wrong? How do you approach work or meetings? With energy and anticipation or nervousness and apprehension? Is your attitude positive and uplifting or always looking for problems and blaming others?
The way we view life is through the lens of perspective, deleting and filtering things all day every day. Our mindset is one the most pervasive lenses across all our perceptions. When you embrace a new belief your mind will find evidence to support you. As author, coach and speaker Anthony Robbins states ‘What’s wrong is always available, but so is what’s right’.
How do you change your mindset?
For many people the biggest impediment to success is themselves. The beauty of mindset is that it can be a choice, the more frequently you access a positive, growth mindset, the easier it will be to maintain it. Below are other steps that you can take to improve your mindset and consequently the results you achieve: 1 Challenge your limiting beliefs Limiting beliefs are the stories we tell ourselves about who we really are e.g. undeserving of love or success. Hanging onto limiting beliefs causes people to continue to live in negative patterns. Replacing limiting beliefs with empowering beliefs and positive habits will enable you to reach new levels of success. 2 Face your fears Many people operate from a place of fear, such as fear of failure, which prevents them from seeing massive opportunities. Fear is a destructive emotion which you don’t have to accept. Overcoming your fears is a major step towards changing your mindset for success. 3 Change your self-talk Starting the process of changing your mindset can seem overwhelming, but it needn’t be. The smallest changes to the language you use and the thoughts you have can make a huge difference, for example, begin with how you start your day. If you put positive language in your head when you wake up, your day will have a positive flow. 4 Keep taking action Successful people are not smarter or luckier, they are more likely to take action to get the result they want. Do more than talk about the result you want, take action and create it for yourself. 5 Invest in your development Successful people not only believe they can be better, they take action to get there. If you want to change the results you are having and give yourself the best opportunity for growth, sign up for a programme, work with a coach or read more. The best part of investing in your development is the positive results you will see in your business and relationships
Sam Mills, is a mindset and results coach supporting women to rediscover their inner confidence, achieve their goals and go from just surviving to thriving. Sam delivers a number of different services including 1-1 coaching, group coaching and workshops for individuals and organisations on the inner critic and imposter syndrome. Sam can be contacted at sammillscoaching@ gmail.com
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Business
Stability and Continuity of Family and Business.
Next Generation. 56
Private Banker and Senior Vice President at a Swiss private bank, Elena Howarth, provides some expert advice on preparing to hand over your business to the next generation to ensure the smooth passage of family assets to them. Waking up early on a sunny morning, we probably all think of the forthcoming events and meetings leading us to another achievement or just a small step ahead – this is what they call entrepreneurship’s spirit and this is what is driving us through this amazing life. Just stop for a second and look around – who else in your family is sharing this sensation? Are you on your own on this path or will your children follow you? Life has changed and people have started looking in detail into the strategy of family business development and thinking more long term. This subject of transmission is not only the business itself, but also family traditions: values and ways of living and an approach to life. When the time is right and if your primary target is not to sell the business, but to pass it to the next generation, it is extremely important to make provision for a smooth transition to secure family values and standard of living. Having entrepreneurs and business owners as friends and clients for many years, I have noticed how crucially important it is for them to know that their company, their creation will exist long term and for many years after.
It is extremely important to make provision for a smooth transition
So, what will happen to your business, when it is time for you to go? For example, if you decide to become a monk in Tibet (as my friend was saying to avoid naming things directly). Depending on the size of business and organisation of the family, as well as the country concerned, there may be different approaches and scale needed in order to ensure the smooth passage of family assets to the next generation. The situation is to be considered from legal, tax and operational levels. Moreover, the firstgeneration succession is the most important. Families have a wide range of legal tools to achieve this goal. Shareholder’s agreements, foundations and trusts serve the purpose well. Not to forget to ensure how inheritance tax will be paid and to consider implementation of a matrimonial property regime. A family may want to create a Charter describing the family values, strategy, roles and responsibilities of members, and, of course, conflict management. It is actually the easiest way to transmit information and set up guidelines for future generations. The decision on whether or not to include children in the family business is a major question. Who are the potential successors? On one-hand parents are thinking - will my son or daughter be able to sustain the family business and will it be successful? Only 35% of businesses survive while being managed by the third generation (John L. Ward, 2011). Alternatively, some children may have no desire or interest to participate in the business as their life interests lie elsewhere. I came across many families where children do not wish to follow the parents’ steps. The recent generations have different values and they choose different strategies in life – oriented to obtain quick results, less attached to property, wishing for more freedom and independence in life. Sometimes it is already clear when they are still quite young, and then it is up to you to accept the situation and allow life to flow as it is, or try to do something about it. For some families it is preferable to rely on external professionals instead of involving the young generation in business at management
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Business
level. In this case, they can be shareholders of a business without management functions. If your child has no desire to be a part of the business, you may just want to entitle him to receive a portion of the company profits as a beneficiary of a family trust. As life is constantly evolving, the intention of children can also change with time. They may initially agree to participate, but then decide to stop being part of family business and therefore the process of family exit options is an important part of future strategy. Creating the path of quitting means preparing for the partial or complete sale and structuring after the situation.
How do you prepare children to be the future leaders of your business? I am sorry to sound boring, but the key word here is ”education” – to train the younger generation and prepare them to deal with the responsibilities and future roles as owners of your family business and become the new leaders. The more and the sooner children are involved in the details of business and family finances, the better the chance they will be willing to participate actively as entrepreneurs and be successful. We speak a lot about work-life balance, but I think it should actually not only be a balance between the two, but to some extent the successful co-existence, a symbiosis of those two important parts of our life. If after work I want to switch to talking to my children about school, it is fine. However, we often underestimate how important it is to talk to children about what happened at work, what we have been doing and what challenges and successes we faced during the day.
There is no guarantee that your child will be an entrepreneur, but at least he will choose his future profession more consciously. The younger generation have to be part of the dialog – openly discuss family issues and taking part in decision making. Talking of family values together, defining the strategy, making sure they are well equipped to face future challenges. Discussions with close family over dinner or creating a complex constitution on paper for a large and diverse family has the same purpose – to create a common base, share the family knowledge and to minimise potential conflicts in the future. A family in conflict is disastrous for a company. Potential sensitive cases between siblings have to be dealt with before they become emotional. Thinking of all those situations in advance will definitely help the family business owner to avoid concerns, unexpected actions and extra costs in the future and will contribute to the success of the family business for generations to come.
The younger generation have to be part of the dialog
Moreover, there are special education programs for business owning families, designed to help the younger generation to become familiar with the business of their family. Another simple idea is to take your kid to work with you one day to make him feel part of your business life.
Elena Howarth is a Private Banker, Senior Vice President at one of the
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largest Swiss private banks. She has been in international banking and finance for over 20 years with global expertise in private banking, including many years of leadership and management responsibilities. She manages a substantial portfolio of UHNW clients and intermediaries and assisting with family wealth structuring.
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