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Feature
HELICOPTER VS. HANDS OFF Students discuss how their family’s style of parenting impacts them
Kolbie Christensen
editor-in-chief
Natalie Lindmark
editor-in-chief
A
t a time in high schoolers lives where discovering oneself and approaching the real world is in front view mirror, parents can sometimes slam on the brakes for them. Parents have long lasting effects on high school kids specifically when it comes to how they parent and their parenting style. Whether it be a strict or laid back, hands on or hands off, helicopter or distant, parenting styles have a large effect on their children’s motivation, decisions, grades and thought process and a variety of different ways kids respond to these styles. Students in this feature have been left anonymous as a way to fully describe their parents’ rules and restrictions. Anonymous senior girl at BV West would describe her parents as strict and overbearing. Watching her grades closely and monitoring that she turns assignments in on time are two things her parents do frequently. “My parents look at my classes pretty often and always check for late/missing work even if I didn’t get points off. They get very upset and I’m not allowed to do anything with friends or for personal pleasures during the week if my grades are bad,” Anonymous said.
Another aspect of their parenting style is expecting her to get A’s and high B’s in all her classes, and aren’t allowed to hangout with friends when her grades are bad. Phone tracking apps are a constant debate between children and parents all over and Anonymous has the same debate with her parents. Meaning she has the app but most of the time she leaves her phone in another place than where she truly is to avoid her parents. Anonymous first noticed how strict her parents could be two years ago and due to those rules and restrictions feels as though she can’t always tell her parents the truth. “Probably sophomore year when I had to start lying about a lot that I was doing even though it wasn’t really wrong, I just knew they would say no if I asked,” Anonymous said. As a senior she knows that her next step is college, which she is looking forward to. Not having her parents constantly watching over her is a big plus. But, she does share the warning her parents gave her about going to college. “I am going to a school far away so I will have a lot of freedom. My parents are paying for part of my college though and they have warned me that if I get bad grades I
will be right back at home,” she said. Another anonymous senior boy feels the same about his parents and believes that they are too strict on him. Stating that his parents are constantly aware of all his plans in and out of school. Anonymous has felt their overarching presence since seventh grade and feels it has never been lifted. Like many kids with strict parents Anonymous is expected to get good grades and is grounded when he doesn’t achieve those standards. Which has happened to him before. With the recent COVID-19 pandemic and school being online since August, parents have new ways of monitoring their children and their school work. Including making sure kids don’t miss their class Zoom. Anonymous knows what it’s like to miss a class, even if it was an accident. “Yes they do and for the one class I missed because of a mistake, they flipped out and lectured me,” he said. Similar to the senior girl, Anonymous is planning on going off to college next year and still knows that he will feel his parent’s presence and pressure. “I know that my parents
