The 7 biggest mistakes people make during a declutter project and how to avoid them
Starting a declutter project may not only seem overwhelming, but also take a lot of courage. We all have our ostrich moments, when we put our heads in the sand and hope it’ll all go away! Helen Sanderson, Then a friend comes around, a pipe starts leaking or your chaotic paperwork lands you with a fine, and you get a short sharp shock. Whatever it is, something makes you look at things differently. All of a sudden you realise the piles of stuff are bigger and you’re in even deeper than you thought. Not a nice feeling.
Don’t know where to start?
95% of my clients tell me they’re stuck because they feel overwhelmed. They DO want to sort it, CAN sort it, but just don’t know where to start. I believe clutter is mainly a psychological block, showing itself in the form of all that stuff sitting in your front/back/spare room, bedroom or garage. The greatest barriers to your desire to sort it out are your own thoughts, beliefs and delusions. Because we all know you don’t need a degree to clear a room! My mum always told me to tidy my room (I’m sure most mums do), as it was a reflection of my mind. She had a point. Your outer world is a reflection of your inner world. Is that hard to hear?
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
Action Is Always Better You want to be free from the nag sitting on your shoulder saying: ‘Sort this out! You’re shameful and no good for letting things get like this!’ Not only that, on a practical day-to-day level, life’s probably getting tougher. You keep losing things, your muddled paperwork might make you behind on your tax return and you may not be setting your kids the best example you’d like. You generally feel tired, drained and unwell, wondering ‘Why am I living my precious life like this?’ This has to stop. The good news is you don’t need years of therapy to sort out your inner world and piles of clutter; you just need to start clearing it – NOW! I guarantee having a tidy home lifts a great weight off your shoulders and gives you a shining smiling presence.
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
It’s Okay To Need A Hand Which I’m guessing is why you’ve ended up checking out Calm From Clutter. Whether you just have a backlog of paperwork to sort out or a few rooms to declutter, we can work on it with you and help restore your peace of mind. However if you’d like to make a start yourself, I thought it would be helpful to share a list of mistakes to avoid. These will help give you the best chance of succeeding and getting the job done. Good luck! Helen
Don’t persuade yourself the problem really isn’t that bad Denial is the first major mistake people make when they want to sort out their clutter. To be frank, if you’re still in denial nothing will get done. The first step is awareness – that things are out of hand, you’re not happy and you need to do something about it. I’ve worked with hundreds of people, many of whom have come to me head in hands, and they only get results when they accept it’s gone too far and want to change. Things only start to change at that point.
“The greatest need of our time is to clean out the enormous mass of mental and emotional rubbish that clutter our minds.” Thomas Merton 7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
2
Don’t start without a clear goal and timescale in mind
This is a bit like setting off on a journey without a map. Having no idea where you’re going or when you need to get there will lead to problems. Of course there’s a time and a place for following your personal flow and allowing the moment to move you. But there’s very little chance it’ll move you to declutter your home! Not setting goals and time limits means things can drag on and on and then assume a life of their own – rather like that pile of clutter that’s become such a formidable presence in your life.
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
“What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from.” -T.S. Eliot
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
3
Don’t think you have to do it all at once
Big mistake no 3. All-or-nothing thinking is often the main thing keeping you stuck in a rut.
You may want to clear a mountain in a short period of time, but beware of underestimating how time-consuming the job will be. This can lead to fatigue and depression, set you up for failure and feed your inner procrastinator – all of which is damaging to your self‑esteem. So pace yourself.
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
“By perseverance the snail reached the ark.” Charles H. Spurgeon
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
4
Don’t underestimate the power of procrastination!
Often people start with the best of intentions then get distracted. This is particularly true when doing something you don’t like, or find challenging and emotionally overwhelming. It’s a common habit – we all do it.
And let’s not forget the allure of social media, texting friends or even mundane things like putting on a wash or baking that cake. Try to be mindful or your specially allocated time will be quickly eaten away.
No-one has ever lost weight without risking temptation, or got to the gym without making a focused and committed decision to do so. The same applies here! 7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
“I don’t wait for moods. You accomplish nothing if you do that. Your mind must know it has to get down to business.” Pearl S. Buck
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
5
Don’t start too big
Once you have the enthusiasm to get going, you may feel you can tackle the whole room. So you begin with the desk, then move to the stuff on the floor, then start on the drawers once you realise you need space to put things in. Before you know it, your two hours are up and you haven’t achieved much. And if you feel disheartened by your lack of progress, this can feed into the limiting belief that there’s no point, you just can’t do it. So the cycle goes on.
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
“Do the difficult things while they are easy and do the great things while they are small. A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” Lao Tzu
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
6
Don’t forget all your things need somewhere to live
You may have read this before but it really is true! How can you clear up if you don’t know where things are going to go? Clothes go in a cupboard, but where do you put parking vouchers, light bulbs, keys, sunglasses and all the other necessities of daily life? That’s when you get into the habit of NOT putting things away. It sounds tough, but not planning where to put things is another way of unconsciously setting yourself up for failure – and one of the reasons you got here in the first place.
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
“Out of clutter find simplicity.” Albert Einstein
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
7
Don’t think you have to throw away or keep everything This belief can be the stumbling block preventing you from starting a declutter project or seeking the help you need from a friend or a coach like me.
Of course you don’t have to get rid of every single thing. Think of it as weeding your garden. It’s about distinguishing the weeds from the good plants which flower and give you joy. Every flower needs space and light and doesn’t thrive in a crowded bed. On the other hand, trying to keep everything is also a way of defeating your own objectives. You need to be realistic about the need for change. 7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
“It all depends on whether you have things, or they have you.” Robert A. Cook
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
© Helen Sanderson 2019
A Final Word Don’t give up and resign yourself! It’s easy to get into catastrophic thinking, feeling that it’s no good or simply not seeing the woods for the trees. Just keep an eye on your clutter cycle and what comes up when you’re trying to make a big change in your life (see the process map opposite). I hope you find this booklet helpful and wish you the best with your decluttering project. If you’re considering working with a decluttering coach, it might help you to know that some people use us not just for support and guidance, but because our presence makes them accountable to someone other than themselves. And sometimes that accountability is the difference between really making the changes you want and running out of steam half way. So if you’d like more advice please just get in touch. We share lots of handy tips and inspiration online so why not follow us on Twitter @CalmFromClutter, like us on Facebook at Ministry Of Calm or sign up for my newsletter at www.helensanderson.com Helen Sanderson
The declutter process cycle map Š Contemplation Dread
Motivation Mot otivation
Sta Start Met needs: n Peace Harmony ony eing Wellbeing
Excit Excitement Euphoria Euph Determination Dete
Completion etio on Action A
Determination ion Persistence Sense of relief Sens
Giving up p
Self-doubt Self-do oubt or doubt doub bt in other
T Tiredness Waning
Boredom
7 biggest mistakes people make when decluttering
Š Helen Sanderson 2019
Visit www.helensanderson.com or call Helen Sanderson on 07989 230244 for a free 15 minute chat about your project. You can also email helen@helensanderson.com Find us, follow us, like us Helen is founder of the Ministry of Calm. To discover more about our philosophy of calm find us at www.ministryofcalm.com or follow us using the details below. Twitter
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