LIVING

Are you too busy being busy?

Slow down to speed up!

This time of year is usually one of transition. A changing season, and with it a change of pace, children settling back into school, work shifting up a gear and a renewed focus on routine. It feels like there’s a lot to organize, to complete and to juggle, and things just can’t wait. Add to that the election, the disastrous effects of climate change and extreme weather in our communities, the ongoing (seemingly never-ending) COVID roller coaster, and the various crises in other parts of the world. It’s not surprising so many of us are feeling overwhelmed by events, changing circumstances and a constant stream of new information.

These times of uncertainty, change and crisis seem to demand our immediate attention and response. Everything can feel urgent, so we get busy doing, taking action, working hard, pushing our agenda and judging others who don’t engage in the same way.

Setting up to fail

In addition to the external environment of urgency, there’s also our internal sense of urgency. Many of us have become addicted to being busy. We pride ourselves on the number of tasks we can juggle and frequently set ourselves unrealistic goals for the time available. Being busy can make us feel important and valued. It can fuel our selfesteem. If we’re not constantly doing something, taking control or fighting for a cause, it can feel like we’re not contributing, or being a good person. It doesn’t help that our culture and society reward us for getting things done. We are praised for being driven, resilient and strong.

In truth, urgency and speed don’t serve us well. When we are always in a hurried rush, we end up more exhausted than effective, so urgency can in fact set us up for failure. It’s also not good for our health. In this "fight or flight" mode, the stress hormones of cortisol and adrenaline kick in. These can inhibit our ability to think clearly, to focus and maintain a balanced perspective. We may overlook, or even ignore, stress signals from our body that are indicating we need to step back or step out. In an effort to feel better and find some comfort in the discomfort, we distract ourselves by seeking reward or pleasure elsewhere.

Is your fix friend or foe?

What are your coping strategies? In what ways do you distract yourself when feeling overwhelmed?

Social media, junk food, sugar, alcohol, Netflix…? Or meditation, prayer, exercise, fresh air, self-care…?

Urgency destroys

While it’s possible to work from this place of urgency and rush, it’s not sustainable over time. It’s tiring, for us and others around us, at work and at home. We can become anxious, impatient and judgmental. We may be busy but, we may not be productive or doing our best work.

Ease creates

When we work from a place of ease, in mind and body, even amidst the busyness, we are more creative, calm, clear-headed and balanced. We make better quality decisions and recognize opportunities. As we relax, we are better able to problem solve and work through our issues.

It is possible to operate in a dynamic, fast-paced environment and be at ease because ease comes from within.

Slow down to speed up

Paradoxically, if we want to speed up, we need to slow down. If we want to do more, we need to focus on less.

Here are five simple things we can do to achieve more ease.

1. Notice when we are not at ease: when the pace at which we are living our life is not serving us well, or when the things that are most consuming our time and energy are not the important things, i.e. whatever gives our life meaning and joy or adds value.

2. Set clearer boundaries on our time. That may mean saying “no” or “not now” to some requests that don’t feel right for us or don’t serve us well. It may mean looking at our decisions and choices and asking ourselves if they are aligned to our values – the things and people who matter most. Clear boundaries require us to know, and stick to, what’s OK for us and what’s not OK.

3. Stop multi-tasking and become selective with our attention. Research shows it take more time to multitask – i.e. constantly switch our attention between tasks. It’s better to plan one task and concentrate until it’s done.

4. Breathe deeply from the belly (rather than the chest). Push the belly out on the inhale and in on the exhale. Do this for three minutes, four times a day.

5. Drink plenty of water. We can’t think clearly when we are dehydrated.

As we transition into fall, what one small thing would allow you to bring more ease into your life?

Hazel Morley has worked as a trainer, facilitator and coach for more than 25 years, in England and after immigrating to Canada in 2009. After her own personal health crisis, she shifted gears to focus on strategies for enjoying optimal health.

Feeling you are being treated differently?

Ten ways to deal with the situation

Feeling that you are being treated differently because of religion, gender, race, sexual orientation or ethnicity can be damaging to one’s well-being. When you face multiple and routine experiences of discrimination, you may experience chronic stress and anxiety.

Individuals who feel that people are avoiding them, that they are not being heard, that they are being questioned without any reason by law enforcement or are denied housing, employment or appropriate health care avoid situations where they expect to be treated differently. This can lead to lost opportunities and delays in settlement and integration. As a newcomer, you may not have the time to deal with the issues and take the necessary action. Here are a few helpful ways to deal with it while pursuing your goals: 1. Disclose or share the experience of discrimination with someone you trust. It can be a friend, a peer, a professional or a faith leader. They can offer support, remind you of your worth and share how they handled similar events.

2. Engage in self-care or spiritual practices that can help you relax as well as give you the strength to deal with these difficult situations. Prayer, meditation or chants can be effective in relaxing your mind and body. Making time for exercise can reduce stress and improve your sleep as well.

3. Journaling can be a helpful way to detail the incidents immediately after they occur. It can help you to go back and see what happened and how you felt about it. Writing down in a journal can alleviate anxieties, help you see patterns and avoid situations that trigger similar emotions. 4. Channel your anger and other emotions through artistic pursuits or hobbies such as writing a story, making a short movie or writing poetry. This has helped many people cope with these negative experiences.

5. Practice appropriate responses in these situations. Reacting calmly or not reacting at all may be the best response for one’s safety and security based on the situation. If needed, enroll in a training program to identify and manage emotions.

6. Empathize with others experiencing unequal treatment. Supporting and validating others can show them that they are not alone and that their experiences are not ignored.

7. Take a stand by joining and supporting a group advocating against all forms of discrimination. You can volunteer your time, use your social media account to educate or make a monetary donation to support the cause.

8. Expand your knowledge about the process, resources and laws prevalent in Canada to take action against discrimination. You will feel empowered to know what help is available if needed, if your claim is valid and what steps and channels are available to pursue it.

9. Embrace your own heritage and culture through music, books, art or films and strengthen your ties with your community. The feeling of belonging will build your selfesteem and make you more resilient to face other future challenges.

10. Learn to recognize the emotions, signs and symptoms you experience and monitor to see if they are interfering with your ability to perform your routine activities. This will help you to seek help from a professional who has the competence to understand your experiences.

Feeling that you are subjected to discrimination when you are struggling to find your footing in a new country can bring up negative feelings that are hard to shake it off. It is important that you don’t dwell over it and remain hopeful by focusing on your strengths, values and beliefs.

Celebrate successes, embrace diversity and create social support networks that are safe and welcoming for you and your family. However, if you notice signs of mental distress, talk to someone, and if you decide to report a situation, get help from the right people!

Making banking easy with the information you need to set up your financial future right. Find out more today.

Visit:

CanadianImmigrant.ca/Newcomer-Financial-Guide today!

Nandini Tirumala is a mental health wellness coach, educator and advocate with 25 years of experience in Canada with a special focus on mental health support services for newcomers and immigrant families.