Caregiver Tips: How to Support a Senior Who Is Resistant to Care Wherever you provide senior care, in Texas or elsewhere, you will at times run across clients who are reluctant to receive care. In these cases, forging a strong and trusting relationship with them is perhaps even more important than when the client is already happy to have your help. Without this kind of relationship, you cannot provide them with the in-home care they require. Following are a few of the steps you can take to support an aging client who is initially resistant to care.
Understand the reasons for resistance. One of the first steps to take when dealing with a client who is resistant to care is to try to understand the reasons for their resistance. There are many reasons an elderly person may not want geriatric care. For instance, if you are a caregiver for a patient with dementia, that person may be incapable of understanding why they need care. Other clients may suffer from a deep sense of pride that makes them feel ashamed of the fact that they need help, or reluctant to admit that they can no longer do everything for themselves. Some may fear losing their dignity or their independence, experience anger at their failing health, or worry about how they will pay for their care. One way to pinpoint the cause of your client's frustration is to discuss their feelings with them. You could also put yourself figuratively in their situation, and imagine what it would feel like to be unable to accomplish certain tasks, to suffer from a progressive illness, or to face a future of declining memory. Doing so will enable you to pinpoint actions that can help to alleviate their resistance. For instance, a client who is afraid of losing their independence may be more amenable to your help if you allow them to do the things of which they are still capable.
In addition, understanding the reasons for your client's resistance can help you to empathize with them. Once you can imagine what it would feel like to be in their position, you will be better able to respond compassionately to them. This patient and compassionate attitude will be essential in helping you to gently encourage them to accept your help. Remain patient with your client. Displaying patience and compassion is another important element in supporting an elderly client who is resistant to care. A successful caregiving relationship, as with any relationship, must be forged over time. You should not expect your client to fully overcome their uncertainty after one conversation or one shift. Instead, their resistance will more than likely dissipate over time, as they gradually get to know you, see the benefits of your help, and begin to trust you to provide them with excellent care. As a result, patiently continuing to offer help, providing a listening ear, and offering companionship and understanding is important in changing your client's attitude toward your home health care services.
Patience is also required if you are to take the small steps in your caregiving job to build trust with your client. For instance, instead of immediately taking over all of the shopping and meal preparation, you could simply offer to help your elderly client prepare their shopping list and accompany them to the store. Eventually, you could offer to go to the store while they remain at home, and slowly work your way toward completing all of the shopping and meal preparation for them. Taking small steps requires patience, but may give your client the time they need to acclimate to your presence and support. Allow your client to make as many decisions as possible. As people age, they gradually lose the ability to do certain things that they once took for granted. For instance, they may lose the ability to drive, to move around easily, to cook, to clean, or to engage in certain hobbies. This loss of control is often a major contributing factor in their resistance to care: They do not want to admit that there are things they can no longer do, or they resent losing control over certain aspects of their lives.
While the areas in which your client needs help are often out of their control, there are still many ways in which they can exercise independence. Recognizing and respecting these areas is a key step toward helping them accept your aid, because it reassures them that you want them to be independent as much as they do. In fact, the purpose of home health services is to help them maintain their independence longer than if they were in a long-term care facility such as assisted living or a nursing home. There are many ways for you to reaffirm your client's independence. For instance, if your job is to take over shopping and meal preparation, you can still allow them to make the shopping list (or assist you in making it). They may be able choose what they eat each day, even if you prepare it. If they have preferences for how their food is cooked, or what pans you use for certain dishes, or what time of day they eat, you should allow them to make these decisions. If they can still participate in some of the meal preparation (such as pouring drinks, setting the table, cutting vegetables, etc.), involving them in these tasks can give them a sense of independence and control.
Winning your client over from a place of resistance will probably take time and effort. However, with understanding, patience, and a willingness to give them control when possible, you may be able to more easily reassure them of your support and encourage them to accept the valuable help you have to offer.