A LAUGH WITH DOUGIE !

A saintly old nun was confined to bed in the last days of her life with all the other sisters hovering around her all the time to tend to her every little need. Late into the night the elderly old dear whispered softly that she was so thirsty and she would love something to drink. One of the younger sisters scurried off to the kitchen and came back a few minutes later with a large glass of milk. The old nun took one small sip and closed her mouth again. The sister in charge wondered about this for a moment and then she took the glass of warm milk, emptied most of it out and topped it up again from a bottle of whiskey that they kept in the parlour for visitors. The old sister took another sip but this time she sat up in the bed and knocked back the whole glass. Dreamy now with the whiskey, she lay back down on the bed and drifted off to sleep. A few days later when she was a little weaker again, the mother superior asked her if she had any final message for the community. The old nun opened her eyes for a fleeting moment, smiled and whispered softly, whatever else ye do…DON’T SELL THAT COW!

So the inspector arrives in the school one day to question the children about all the different things that they were learning. He eventually turns his attention to Geography and asks the boys and girls to put up their hands if they could explain which was nearer…New York or the Moon? The teacher grimaces with despair when she sees little Paddy shoot up his hand…the Moon says he full of confidence….and how do you know that young man? the inspector asks….Paddy just couldn’t believe the inspector could be so thick… Well says the bould Paddy…ya can see the moon from here…..YA CAN’T SEE NEW YORK…..CAN YA ? ? ?