how to pray when things are going well The times in my life I have felt the most grounded in my faith were also the most dramatic. I would go to the adoration chapel every morning, and sometimes every night, to open or close my day vocalizing a whole monologue of life drama to relay to the good Lord, looking for peace or answers. I would most always walk out with a sense of satisfaction. It was like therapy. Great stuff. In those times, I had a mission. There was a certain problem to analyze. A puzzle to solve. A wound to heal. An important decision to make. Even in the fast pace of life, the adoration chapel was the slow down I needed, and if not there, it was the paddle board on Cane River or sitting at the boat launch of Sibley Lake with a journal and rosary in hand, bare toes dipped in the water. Fast forward five years, and I’m sitting at a desk and computer thirty-seven hours a week, and there’s no “drama” to relay and figure out. I’ve ticked off all the boxes I was once praying for. A cute little house with one of my best friends and a kitty cat named Niko I have a love-hate relationship with. I finally prefer fruits and vegetables over Papa John’s Pizza. I can make a mean homemade lasagna and homemade sauce. I have a job that allows me to be creative and work with wonderful people and a sparkly ring from the literal love of my life with the bluest eyes and curliest brown hair and the most beautiful voice. For the most part, I got all my answers and my happily ever afters. It’s the end of the movie, and I’m sitting in the epilogue. What happens after that? Why does my spiritual life taste stale when life is so sweet? As I’ve settled into the 8-5ish work life balance, fallen into the daily grind of get up, work, go home, sleep, I’ve sunken into this wave of complacency, content where I am, life and resume wise, but my conversations with God go a little like, “Uh hey, yep. Still here. Existing. And there’s nothing I can do about it. Thanks though. You’re awesome. Aight I’mma head out.” When things are going well, it’s hard to just sit with God and be present and happy. I had tried sitting in the chapel and giving prayers of thanksgiving, but it felt more obligatory and empty gestured than spiritually moving. I was feeling this way when writing this article, four hours to my deadline, and not a single word. I had been feeling this moody
Prayer doesn’t always look like kneeling in a chapel. Aside from adoration, some of the best prayer time I’ve had was paddling on Cane River and splashing my Chacos in the water, soaking in the sun for hours at a time.
sense of existential angst in what should be the happiest time of my life. Like, I made it to the perceivable finish line to all the things I wanted to be “happy” and somehow, I was less satisfied than I was before. Just kind of... existing. We live most hours of our days cooped up in offices, houses, next to TV screens, our phones on hand for any text we need to whip out O.K. Corral style. At the end of the day, we are mentally exhausted, and that just doesn’t have the same satisfaction of physical exhaustion. It’s hard to sit still to pray when I’ve been sitting still All. Day. Long. When our spiritual health is lacking, our physical health can sometimes be a good place to start in getting back on track. Eat some fresh veggies. Get in the dirt. Sit on the porch and listen to the birds sing. Splash your feet in the water. Wade into God’s creation unapologetically and wholeheartedly. If you’re struggling to run from one church group to the next or worry about whether or not you’ve said enough prayers or rosaries this week before going to sleep, give yourself permission to slow it down and take yourself on a prayer date out in nature to disconnect from the fast paced, productivity worshiping society we often find ourselves trapped in. So if I had one piece of advice to get out of a complacent, existential, spiritual rut, it’s to take your prayer outside. It’s May! The weather is great! Get those negative ions by walking barefoot in the grass. Breathe in the fresh oxygen straight from the trees instead of the recycled air of an HVAC unit. Say a rosary with your toes scrunched in the dirt, eyes closed, sun baking on your skin. (Wear your sunscreen though!) In my own personal and not so humble opinion, we were never meant to praise God solely from the confines of our man-made structures, inevitably falling into a monotonous drone of just going through the motions for the sake of tradition. Sometimes the best refresh is a change in perspective. So put on some sunscreen, throw on a hat, grab your rosary, and take a spiritual walk. The weather’s beautiful. The water’s great. The next puzzle to solve is presence.
MAY 2022
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