A Way of Being with Children: Promoting Positive, Trauma-Informed Interactions with Children

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A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

The attitude we choose to have about the situation determines the nature of our response.


When we choose to accept people, we avoid passing judgment or imposing our opinions

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN WORDS MATTER

FEAR/INSECURITY Lazy Messy Loud Naughty Bad at writing You never listen You always yell

VS

SAFETY/MUTUAL RESPECT Kind Thoughtful Patient Good at sharing Helpful Independent You are a strong reader


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Acceptance is at the heart of developing good relationships.


By accepting the child, you are valuing the person not the behavior.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


By suspending judgment, a child feels safe to change.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


Focus on the child’s positive qualities and help her build the skills needed to no longer act out to get your attention.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


Pay attention: the child can teach you about his world when you follow his lead.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


Separate the difference between your feelings and thoughts and those of the child.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


Focus on “what is.” Stay in the present and practice being mindful.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


Believing the child can do it may be enough to encourage him to try and, ultimately, succeed.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

When we to choose Believe the child is able learn, to accept people, wants to learn, and will learn.


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

A positive relationship is based on respect, dignity, non-judgmental acceptance of one another, and care for each other’s well-being.


Children with special needs are a gift that challenges us to respond in the best way we can.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


“I have come to a frightening conclusion: I am the decisive element in the classroom. It is my personal approach that creates the climate. It is my mood that makes the weather. As a teacher, I possess tremendous power to make a child’s life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration. I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal."

-Dr. Haim Ginott

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


The first relationships or bonds in a child’s life often determine the way that child perceives the world.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

A teacher’s encouraging tone of voice can make the child feel safe to explore his or her world.


The quality of a child’s early attachment affects the rest of her life because attachment is an essential part of how a child’s brain develops.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

It takes a village to raise a child. - African Proverb


The teacher-child relationship has become one of the most important connections in children’s lives, affecting their future well-being and their ability to connect with and relate to others.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


Words often only have one meaning for the young child. Words are understood as literal and concrete.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

What a child experiences with parents and caregivers, including how those adults respond to him, shapes his development as he adapts to the world.


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

The functioning of the mature brain is a reflection of early experiences.


Brain development and social mastery occur when the child is in her comfort zone, feeling safe and secure.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


Repetition, structure, and consistency are important for the child to learn.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

A child’s positive development is created within the context of his relationships with caregivers.


A trauma-informed approach involves acknowledging the role trauma may play in an individual’s life and being sensitive to the results of that trauma.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


An equity lens helps us see where challenges and opportunities exist, so that we can make intentional steps to ensure more equitable outcomes for all individuals and communities.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

“The greatness of a community is most accurately measured by the compassionate actions of its members.” -Correta Scott King


Children in positive community environments feel that they have people to trust and that the adults in their lives will notice when they do well or accomplish things.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


Resiliency can be encouraged, modeled, and taught through strong, secure attachment in the early years.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A child’s ‘bad behavior’ may be caused by discomfort and pain from sounds, taste, touch, or sight.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Our ears take in sounds and help us understand the noises around us.


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Smelling something familiar from childhood can remind us of both good and bad past experiences.


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Our vision provides much of the information we need to understand where we are and what is happening around us.


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Positive touch allows for attachment between parents/caregivers and infants. It provides the foundation for a positive emotional climate.


If a child’s proprioceptive system functions correctly, he knows where his body is and how to move it appropriately.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


When a child’s vestibular system is not functioning correctly, they cannot control their arousal level or easily transition from being active to being quiet.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Caregivers must be aware of sensory integration and how it affects a child’s ability to self regulate, self-control, and the possible ways that a child may be seeing the world.


There is always reason for the misbehavior of a young child. As adults, we have to be investigators to figure out what a child is trying to tell us.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Most sensory avoiders are oversensitive: they experience sensory input more intensely than the average person, and they avoid it because it’s overwhelming to them.


Most sensory seekers are under-sensitive to input: they look for more sensory stimulation.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


“Play for a child is as water for a fish, the jungle for a monkey, or the desert for a cactus.” -Carol & Bryon Norton

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

We often learn more about children’s thoughts, feelings, motivations, and struggles when we watch them play than when we talk with them or ask questions.


Play is an essential activity that teaches children many of life’s skills and lessons.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


Structure is the scaffolding in the classroom that creates a sense of order and safety for the children and the teacher.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


Having a safe, quiet, personal space helps children to feel secure.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


When we listen, we are letting the child know that we respect and appreciate him.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Reflective listening is hearing what the child is saying and reflecting back to the child, without judgment, what you think the child may be trying to say or express with her words or actions.


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Encouragement helps children appreciate their own qualities and feel capable and worthwhile just as they are.


When a child makes a mistake or misbehaves, it is an opportunity to teach, not to punish.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Setting limits makes the child feel safe.


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Setting limits without saying “no” gives the child a chance to correct his mistake without feeling judged.


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Setting limits teaches respect for another’s property.


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Setting limits protects other children.


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Setting limits protects the child.


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Setting limits protects the caregiver.


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

Create an atmosphere that allows the child to shift from unacceptable behavior to acceptable behavior by avoiding judgment as a part of setting limits.


ACT: Acknowledge the feeling. Communicate the limit. Target an Alternative.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


Choices give the child the opportunity to learn to problemsolve and take responsibility for his actions.

A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN


A WAY OF BEING

WITH CHILDREN

We learn to see the world through the child’s eyes by participating in the child’s world.


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