Always and Forever by Amanda Steinman

Dear Collin,

I am sorry it has taken me so long to write. I have been busy, touring around the city, studying, and working; but, me being busy is no excuse to not write or return your messages. It is time for me to be honest with you and myself. I did not know exactly how to say the things I am about to say. Before I begin, I want you to know how much I truly love you and have loved our time together. I had so much fun visiting you before I left for Italy, getting to see where you work, your office, and your apartment. That was a weekend I will never forget. I have decided to stay in Italy. I have been offered a full-time position as a teacher. I will be teaching young children how to speak English. With that being said, I think it is best that we go our separate ways. I am in Italy and you are in Chicago. If I knew when I would be returning home, or if I was returning home at all, things would be different. I truly am sorry. I love you and I hope, someday, we will see each other again. I wish you the best and send my love. I love you, Collin, always and forever.

Love, Caroline

It is a late Wednesday afternoon in the dead of winter. The snow is falling quickly from the sky, covering the footprints that the previous bypassers had just recently left behind. Collin stares blankly out the window of his office on East Madison Street in Chicago, two blocks from Millennium Park. He has everything he always dreamed of having: his dream job, car, and home. He is a successful CEO of Centro, a company that provides software solutions for companies in the advertising industry. But there is one thing that Collin does not have—Caroline, the girl he has been longing for. Fifteen years have passed, but it feels like just yesterday. After a few minutes, Collin begins to realize that one of the bypassers below had stopped and is staring back at him. A few moments later, the face becomes a familiar one and the memories of Collin’s college days quickly return.

“Caroline, we have spent countless nights in here studying together, but yet we never speak more than a few words or spend time together outside of the library. Why don’t we stop studying and you let me buy you a drink? Just this once.” said Collin. Collin had been waiting for the right time to ask Caroline for a drink, but he had been nervous of the results, and what they would do to their friendship. If you could even call their relationship a friendship. They spent every night in the library

studying together, but only speaking to the other when they had a question about the assignment. Nothing more. “Just this once,” Caroline replied. Collin and Caroline left the library and walked down the street to a bar. Collin had picked this bar because he was hopeful that it would not be as busy as the others, giving them the opportunity to talk without interruptions. As the evening went on, one drink turned into another. Eventually, when it was time for the bar to close, Collin led Caroline out of the bar and down a couple blocks to his apartment. As they entered the apartment, they begin to kiss. As their kissing continued, it became more intense. The next morning, Collin woke up and realized that the other side of the bed was empty. Caroline had gotten up and left without even leaving a note. It was then that he realized that he did not have her phone number because they simply always met in the library, never sending a text message or calling beforehand. That evening, like always, Collin arrived at the library to see Caroline sitting in their normal booth, studying. As he approached her, she did not say anything, acting like nothing even happened the previous evening. Finally, after an hour, Collin broke the silence. “Caroline, are you not going to say anything? You just simply left without saying goodbye or leaving a note? And now, you sit here, acting like nothing happened between us? Did last night mean nothing to you?” asked Collin. “Of course, it meant something to me. I have done nothing but want you since the first day I saw you. That was when I fell in love with you. It was love at first sight,” said Caroline. From that moment on, Caroline and Collin were no longer classmates who studied together. They began doing everything together. They were inseparable.

After graduating from high school, Collin moved from his hometown, Chicago, to Columbia, where he would be attending The University of Missouri. Mizzou is the home of one of the oldest formal journalism schools in the world. This was the journalism school where he hoped he would turn his childhood dreams into a reality. From a young age, Collin had planned to be a sports broadcaster for the NBA. Throughout his first two years, he enjoyed his college experience, along with all of his friends, staying out too late, drinking too much, but still, somehow making it to class on time the next morning. Even though he was attending his classes, he wasn’t passing them; which, eventually ruined his dreams of becoming a sports broadcaster. As he sat in his apartment alone, Collin was left to decide where to go from there. He had officially hit rock bottom; his childhood dreams were ruined and his friends were nowhere to be found. On top of everything else crumbling to the ground around him, Collin had just recently received a letter in the mail from Caroline, his girlfriend, informing him that instead of just spending her semester

studying abroad in Italy, that she decided to move there. She had been offered a full-time job, teaching children how to speak English. Caroline wrote that she loved him and always would, but that for now, she thinks it’s best that they go their separate ways, and maybe their paths would cross again someday. He was officially alone in a world full of billions of people. Collin spent the remainder of his time in college in his apartment, only leaving to go to work or class. He changed his field of study to business. With this major being general, he was hopeful that he would have a wide range of careers to choose from post-graduation. Following his graduation from the University of Missouri, Collin returned home to Chicago, where he accepted a position as an assistant at Centro. Five years ago, Collin thought he had ruined his life by being forced to accept the fact that he was no longer going to be able to be a sports broadcaster. Even though he did not achieve his childhood goals, Collin has done well for himself. He is wealthy, successful, and he lives the life all single men in their late twenties dream of living. But one thing has been missing, and Collin couldn’t figure out what it was until the by passer standing on the street, in the middle of the snow storm, smiled up at him. It was in that moment, that for the first time in years, he felt complete. “Caroline,” Collin said.